"I didn't hate you." Edward said to me as we strolled in Ithaca Commons. He frowned broodingly at the path ahead. He was always so brooding and grumpy. As though he had the world's burdens on his shoulders. I figured he didn't hate me, specifically. He hated everyone equally which was a small consolation on my ego. "Your blood sang to me."

Singers, I read them in Carlisle's study. He had a whole shelf specifically for the study of their kind. He had written the books himself. Bound them in thick covers with silver accents.

Volume I: The Vampire Truth and Existentialism (1703)

Volume II : Society of Vampires and How It Was Founded (Volturi) (1735)

Volume IIII: Singers: Temptation and the Theological Implications (1772)

Volume IV: The Physiology of our Species and the Supernatural (1810)

Volume V: The Other Side of Vampirism: Human Blood Substitute and Overcoming Bloodlust (1884)

There were other titles he'd written. All of which I'd consumed in a matter of weeks. Carlisle's books were fascinating and the way he'd written them told me he used to be very conflicted with the creature he'd turned into. Singers, Carlisle wrote in his elegant script, were humans whose blood smelled appetizing to a vampire. Aro called them La Tua Cantante.

Edward had called me his specific brand of heroine.

"You were glaring at me across the room. I wouldn't say you liked me."

Edward crossed his arms. "My throat burned and ached whenever you were in the room. I could barely restrain myself from lunging myself in your direction and draining you."

I looked at him dryly. "Wow, thanks."

We fell into long lapses of silence as we watched passersby go and leave.

"I don't want to be your bonded mate." I said bluntly.

He sputtered. "w-what? Why?" He demanded.

"You're too young for me." I argued.

"We're the same age." He frowned deeply.

"Hardly. You're a hundred and eight."

"This is ridiculous." Edward growled, looking close to throwing a tantrum in the middle of the place.

"I know you've been alone." I started. "And Carlisle presumptuously turned me with the sole purpose of being your mate, but that's hardly fair for me, at all, don't you think? Don't I get to decide what I want to do with my life?"

Edward rolled his eyes. Like my words made little sense. "I wish I could read your mind. Alright then, I'll humor you for now. I could wait. I have an eternity, after all."

Maybe, in another life, I would have found him romantic. I would have climbed in his back and enjoyed the wind in my hair. But I couldn't. Not when all I could think about was Carlisle, his father and my own sire. But the man didn't want me and I couldn't just pluck him out of his wife's arms, could I? And I liked Esme — so different from Reneé. She was caring and gentle. She'd been more like a mother to me than Reneé had ever been.

Yet, despite Carlisle's rejections, I often thought about the way he kissed me. How he plunged his hand into my hair, taking control, and tilting my head to deepen the kiss. Was that a common occurrence to newborns like me to their sire? A ritual of some sort? Like, sealing the pact or something? I didn't know the man. Not even his name when I'd awoken.

I huffed and changed the topic. "What's it like being forever seventeen?"

Edward smiled crookedly. "It's great..."

I thought my life would be different now that I was a vampire. I thought I'd be gallivanting with other vampires in big, haunted castles. The Cullens were disgustingly rich. I knew they had properties around the globe. I supposed I was Isabella Cullen now, too. One of Carlisle's foster kids. But perhaps I was reading too much of Anne Rice's novels and my new life was nothing like Lestat's adventures.

I spent most of my time reading and avoiding Carlisle. I became close friends with Alice, too, and formed a begrudging camaraderie with Rosalie.

Sometimes, I would ask about Charlie.

I missed him. While he wasn't the greatest dad in the world, he was my father and I loved him. I didn't know what Carlisle told my parents or how my death was received. I thought it's better to not know at all. I hoped Charlie didn't mourn for me for too long.

Not sleeping was also weird. I insisted on my own bed to be put in my room. The canopy bed Esme bought made me feel like a princess. And on there, I laid awake at night just staring upwards, waiting for the sleepiness to settle. I'd lay until the dawn set without feeling tired but very restless.

And then there was the absence of hunger. My stomach never grumbled. I missed eating but I never once craved human food to the point of my mouth watering. The only irritating thing was the thirst. When I was thirsty, my throat burned. And animal blood, though unsatisfactory, was enough to satiate the burn.

There was also the matter of me. The first time, I gazed at myself in the mirror, I was taken aback. I was convinced I was looking at a stranger who vaguely looked like me. I was — I didn't want to sound vain but I was beautiful. It was part of the vampire allure to catch human prey. It was then I realized I wasn't looking at Bella Swan. I was looking at Isabella Cullen. The young, pretty foster daughter of Dr. and Mrs. Cullen.

It was enough to make me feel pretty sullen.

"Bella," Rosalie snapped her hands in front of me, shaking me from my reverie. "Have you decided on any of the cars yet?"

I looked around helplessly. I missed my Chevy, too. The statuesque vampire eyed me expectantly. Rosalie loved cars. I often saw her tinkering in the garage. I pointed at the sleek black car to my left. I felt overwhelmed by the amount of money they were willing to spend on me.

Rosalie nodded, pleased. And I breathed a sigh of relief.

"We are not done. You know we have to meet Alice for shopping later."

The Cullens sure did love dragging me around.

"Alice, I'm not wearing that!" I batted her hands.

"Stop screeching, Bella. It's a summer dress and you'll look lovely and delicate in it. Won't she, Rosie?"

Rosalie nodded, bending down to choose a slipper. She shoved them in my arms. "Wear these, too."

It seemed my new sisters made me their dress up doll. Alice kept shoving me a light blue floral strap midi dress. It was sensually pretty. If I were human, I would flush to the roots of my hair. I snatched the offending garment from Alice's hands anyway.

"We're going to a party later. We have to be perfect." Rosalie said.

"A party?" I started to panic. "I can't go to a party!"

"It's one of Esme's elaborate tea parties. You know how she's very excited about these. She rarely gets to arrange little parties like this."

I stammered, "but humans--"

"Bella, you'll be fine." Rosalie soothed, brushing a hand through my hair. "You're a gifted shield. Haven't you shown great restraint these past months? And we are in a human store, right now."

I groaned. It was true. After meeting Eleazar, Carlisle's dear friend and cousin by the Denalis, I was declared to be a shield. A very strong one, the man said with approval. I didn't know what that meant exactly except it kept me safe from Edward's prying mental reading and Jasper's emotional manipulation.

"Fine." I bit out. "Fine."

Alice clapped and shoved me into the dressing room.

We arrived at the party early. The weather was perfect for an outside event. It was cloudy and there were no signs of rain pour. Esme was in the garden, fussing over the tables, porcelain, and the various selections of finger sandwiches and pastries. There was a chocolate fountain I deigned to taste — gagging when it touched my tongue. Alice forced me to sit so she could fix my hair, tying a big blue ribbon in my hair.

She beamed at me once she was finished.

I returned her smile ruefully. I really was their barbie doll, wasn't I?

When the guests started to arrive, I kept myself busy by strolling around the garden with a glass of cold pink lemonade in my hand. I saw Carlisle arrive dressed in a blue oxford shirt and white slacks with his blond hair in a disarray. He was so handsome, it made me feel ill. I hid myself in one of the tall bushes and turned to walk the other way.

I was stopped by a taller figure and I crashed into him, sending both of us in the ground with my lemonade in his shirt.

"Are you okay?" The man said, chuckling good-naturedly. I immediately righted myself up and grimaced. Thankfully we were behind the bushes.

"I'm sorry." I said, offering my hand. I seemed to surprise him when I easily helped him up. "I'm really, sorry. I —"

"It's fine." The man's eyes twinkled. "I have a spare shirt in my trunk."

"That's — that's great." I offered awkwardly.

"Have I met you before?" He asked, tilting his head.

"I don't think so." I dusted my dress from dirt. "I'm Isabella Sw- Cullen."

He shook my hand, grinning. "Ah, pleasure to meet you. Anthony Beaufort, Miss Isabella." I wasn't used to being so ogled openly. This dress wasn't really helping my cause. "You must be Carlisle's sister, yes? I think he mentioned having a sister to me once."

Human men were getting stranger the longer I spent time in this man's presence. I could actually feel his eagerness, and lust through the rush of his blood. It was ... fascinating . Exhilarating, at best. I stared up at him curiously. His pupils dilated and he stepped closer to me.

Oh ... OH.

Was this the vampire allure Carlisle had written in one of his books?

I broke the eye contact to break him out of the haze. He shook his head. "Are you opposed to taking a stroll around the garden and nibbling on some sandwiches?"

I was about to refuse when an authoritative voice interrupted me. "Isabella, sweetheart, I think Alice is asking for you inside." Carlisle stopped beside me and cocked his head toward the house.

"Anthony, I see you've met Isabella." Carlisle said pleasantly.

"Your sister and I were just getting acquainted."

"I'll go find Alice." I muttered.

He dropped a kiss on my temple as I walked away. I breathed shakily.

I saw Alice inside holding trays of cookies. "Carlisle said you were asking for me?"

She gave me a weird look. "Was I? Well, I suppose you could put these cookies in the pastry stands. They smell heavenly."

They did smell heavenly. I mourned at my loss of appetite for human food. I roved my eyes around the garden to search for Carlisle. He and Mr. Beaufort were talking and nodding. As though sensing my eyes on him, he met my gaze. His golden eyes seemed more dark. I figured Carlisle hadn't fed yet. I looked away to carefully place the cookies in the stand.

Had Carlisle noticed I used my allure on the poor man? He looked angry. I bit my lip worriedly. It wasn't as if I knew what I was doing. Not wanting to ponder about his anger, I sat with Rosalie who was busy talking with the other seated guests and poured myself tea.

Tea was consumable at least, I thought with relief.

"You must try these caramel éclairs, Bella. They're good!" Rosalie said enthusiastically, shoving me a plate of her uneaten éclairs. My eyes twitched from refraining to glare at her.

"They're divine, Rosie." One of her friends agreed.

I groaned when Edward emerged from the garden's entry door, his expression brightening upon catching sight of me. Emmett followed closely behind him.

Helplessly, I took a bite of the éclair and downed the disgusting taste with tea, slamming the teacup on the plate as I swallowed.