A/N: Short-ish chapter than normal but that's just because I'm about to go on holiday to sunny Spain and then come back for a week and go on holiday again. If my boss is gonna refuse to give me my annual leave spread out throughout the year, then I'm gonna make the most of a block of time off and toast my little body on a beach somewhere you know? get the sunshine England denies me.

The delay this months is thanks to BG3, I'm sorry, the brain rot won't end it's all I wanna do

Thanks to those who read and favourited since last chapter. Especially for Eennio and Allytb420 for reviewing!

Please, I beg for any crumbs of attention, I know I never post but leave me a review pretty please :(

ALL THE THREADS OF FATE

PART II

OUT OF THE WOODS

XIV.

The rest of patrol was a haze. I could not say if there was anything out of the ordinary, or more students sneaking out of bed. I was a somnambulant steered astray by her reveries.

Splitting up had been a bad idea. It'd allowed me some respite to process what I'd seen and heard; it'd lasted too long. By the time I trailed back to Lily, pretending to be unaffected was impossible.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lily broke the tense silence as we climbed up the portrait hole to the Gryffindor common room.

"There's nothing to say."

There was plenty to say, actually. I thought in this case, however, less was more. Anything I said would only show Marlene she'd gotten a reaction.

"That's—" Lily faltered. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Morgaina.

"Perfectly fine." I may have said it with a little bit more force than necessary. Oh, well. She thought I was upset, anyway.

I pushed into our dorm.

It appeared darker than usual; the vaulted ceilings too hollow, the stone walls too constricting. The room's diametre was a fist around my throat. Dorcas and Mary were still awake. Dorcas was reading in bed, a luminous blue ball hovering above her head, while Mary had half her hair in a tight braid and was in the process of braiding the rest. They both looked up as Lily and I entered. Mary dropped her arms, sent Lily a nervous look.

"Mer—" Lily tried once more.

I turned to Dorcas before she could finish speaking.

"Did you know? That Marlene's shagging Sirius?"

Dorcas avoided my gaze, her mouth a thin tight line. Right. So that was a yes.

I turned to Lily as she slumped into her bed, knees tucked beneath her.

"And you found out on Mary's birthday, isn't that right? I woke up and heard your whispers, I just didn't listen enough to find out who..."

I plopped on my bed, bouncing with the effort. My heart was racing, my stomach was riotous but I couldn't quite discern what emotion was flushing through my body.

How long had this been going on? Marlene had played with Sirius's hair at Mary's party and he hadn't even blinked at the gesture. He had called her beautiful on the same afternoon the sight of him laughing had robbed me of breath. Had he fucked her while I cried myself to sleep after our last conversation?

It's not about you. it's not about you. it's not about you it'snotaboutyou

But it felt like it was. I knew they weren't together to hurt me, that I hadn't even crossed their minds, I didn't play any part in their story—but did they all have to keep it from me?

"You could have told me." I told Dorcas.

Dorcas's mouth twisted to one side. Her eyebrows scrunched together.

"When?" Lily asked. I was glad for the distraction from Dorcas's pity. "Meredith, don't take this the wrong way, but lately it's like you are never with us outside of class. You're always disappearing to god-knows-where in the castle, or swimming in the lake, or with your other friends without offering us to join."

"It's been worse the past few weeks," Mary nibbled on her bottom lip, looking more uncomfortable than I'd seen her in years. "We thought... well, we thought you'd found out and just needed some time to process."

My attention snagged on the start of her argument. Few weeks. So, longer than Mary's birthday, then. When Marlene's hair had glowed pink whenever Sirius neared, did it start then? When I'd seen the vague outline of a future I couldn't even dare hope would come to pass, robbed of speech, squeezed between Emilia and Alice as the three of us peered into the same crystal ball, had they been sneaking off to the attics?

I scoffed. "Process."

I rubbed at my forehead. Mary moved to sit beside me. She reached out for my hair, twisting it into four separate sections. The silence was thick as Mary plaited my hair. Lily watched, expectant, but Dorcas busied herself with her book, rifling through the pages.

"I'm sorry," I said to all of them.

I had avoided them, and it hadn't been fair, or very nice. And it had been terribly impolite of me to assume they wouldn't notice I was doing it.

"I've been feeling a little... fragile, I guess. I wished to be alone. But you should have still told me. It would have been better than finding out like that," I added, because my hair had also glowed pink and Dorcas knew why I wanted Mr Inoue's book, so I wasn't fooling anyone any longer. "I didn't—I had no idea Marlene even fancied him."

Except that I did. I simply refused to see it.

That unnamed bloke she'd been devastated to think assumed she fancied Remus was Sirius, because of course it was. If Sirius thought Rem and Marlene were testing the waters, he would have backed off. The fierceness with which she had defended Sirius, his ever-faithful watchdog, always willing to offer aid or take his side by lingering and sitting beside him when last year it had been the complete opposite.

Last year, Marlene had cautioned me against him, quoting the many girls he'd snogged with no intention of pursuing a real relationship. Last year, Marlene had taken my side. Last year, Marlene had spread rumours about him, and given him the cold shoulder in the immediate few months following our break-up. The pettiness had eventually subsided, but I'd assumed it was because she'd noticed I was doing better.

"We know," Dorcas said from where she stood with her arms around one of the bedposts. "It's why I kept quiet, figured you didn't need anything else. Also, you get a little stupid whenever Black is involved."

"Oi." I protested.

Mary tutted, tugging at my hair, so I stilled, looked at Dorcas out of the corner of my eye.

"You know it's true." Dorcas gave me a Look. I bit my lip. "You only need to look at him for your intelligence to half."

My mouth opened, but it was more a reflex, an urge to defend myself I hadn't been able to curb, and no words followed. I was exhausted of feeling... like this.

I wanted things to get better, utterly convinced that if I fixed this one aspect of my life, the rest—whatever the hell my parents were doing in Wales, Fabian's secrecy, my dreams—wouldn't weight as much. My anger wouldn't die; it kept holding on, clutching at driftwood to stay afloat and see another day. I had no idea how to kill it. I had no idea how to explain this to Dorcas and Lily, either, while hoping that Mary would listen when I emphasised how important it was that we kept this between us.

The door opened before I had figured it out. The four of us tensed.

Marlene strode in with her hair up in a messy bun. Though her shirt was buttoned, it was crumpled, and the zipper of her skirt was on the front rather than the side. One of her stockings was bunched up at her ankle, the other secured by her thigh. Her school robes were thrown over her shoulder, her index finger hooked on the neckline. She looked fabulously dishevelled, even with the lightly smudged mascara under her eyes.

"So?" Marlene sniffed. "Let's hear it."

I stared at her. Lily stifled a sharp laugh, almost bitter, that stuck to the back of her throat like a bad cough.

"Come on, Meredith!" Marlene goaded. Complained? I couldn't quite tell, it was a strange tone. It irked me something fierce, anyway. "I know you're mad, so get it over with already."

"Cut it out, McKinnon." Dorcas snapped. "You don't have to rub it in."

Merlin. Maybe I could feed myself to the giant squid next time I went for a swim.

"Is this why you've been so short with me lately?" I asked Marlene without rising to the bait. Or, well, trying. My voice was strained only just. "You thought... what? That it would impress him?"

Marlene laughed like I had just delivered the best joke she'd heard in her life. It was an ugly sound, mean and hurtful. My cheeks burned.

Arms crossed, her stare turned poisonous. "Not everything is about you, you know."

I thought you'd cast a silencing charm, Sirius had said.

You said you wouldn't sneak out tonight! Lily had been outraged.

You aren't mad? Marlene had sounded so perplexed, out of sync, like she had run the scenario several times through her head and I had gone off script.

Not everything was about me, maybe, but this? This she had planned. Instead of pulling me aside and telling me she was dating Sirius, she'd orchestrated an ambush.

"I don't understand." I mumbled. "Why didn't you just tell me?"

I may have been distant, especially towards Marlene, choosing to let the friendship fade away rather than cutting it off at the root, but she and I did share time outside of class. We were working on an herbology project together, for Merlin's sake! It dictated we spent hours a week in the greenhouses by ourselves, and a lot of it was the type of mindless work that was perfect for chatting. It was in one such opportunity, as a matter of fact, that she had told me just last week, she'd been the one to owl Hogwarts: a Gossip about the Ravenclaw cheating scandal.

"You've always acted like he's yours. He's not yours!" She stumped her feet. Her voice took on a shrill quality. "Maybe this way you'll finally get it through your stupid head!"

Dorcas coughed, uncomfortable. Lily was finding her duvet to be the most interesting thing in the room. The flush that had burned my cheeks before had extended to my whole body. I didn't dare look at Mary.

I might have been, once upon a time, a little possessive of Sirius. Since the moment we'd found each other on the Hogwarts express and he had sprawled on the bench with his head on my lap, and Alice's eyes had lingered a little too long on his face, every muscle in my body had tensed, ready, like that simple curious look had been a personal offense. What, are your eyes stuck in one position? had been my exact words to her, I believed. As we grew up, and all the girls started to notice him, I had always maybe-not-so-subtly suggested the girls away from him. Nothing obvious, I had hoped, just a but what about Ben? He has such cute freckles. It hadn't been jealousy exactly, more like I was worried if Sirius fell in love, actual, proper love, we wouldn't be able to be that close anymore. I would have to give him up.

So of course Marlene had expected me to be mad. Of course Marlene had to shove her perceived victory in my face.

"That's not the issue here!" I shook my head. "Marlene, what the fuck? Why would you even consider—you know what he did to me!"

Something I was regretting with every ounce of my soul, and had been doing so since the moment I'd told her. She'd been such a good friend to me then, though, we'd been so close and I'd so desperately needed someone. Dorcas and her parents travelled every chance they got, every break no matter how short. Lily's parents had taken her to Spain that Christmas, the first time since First Year that they travelled abroad. They'd both been unreachable and taking quill to parchment had been impossible, I hadn't had the words.

"Well, it's a bit different, isn't it, babes?" Marlene mocked. "I won't go and try to kill myself. I'm not pathetic."

It was like the air got sucked out of the room. For a moment, nobody moved or even breathed. The sour scowl on Marlene's face dissolved slowly, by fractions until it turned to horror. She slapped her hand over her face. It spurred our dormmates into a reaction.

Mary gasped like she'd been swimming without a breath for too long and was desperate for air. Lily jumped from the bed. Dorcas's what?! sounded as much demand as it was shock.

"Shit." Marlene cursed through her fingers. "Meredith, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that—I wasn't thinking! I only—"

Her voice cut off. She put a hand to her throat, mouth still moving even if no sound came out. I lowered my wand.

"What is she talking about?" Lily asked.

She was so pale, her freckles were grey. I stayed silent.

Dorcas strode forward until she could shake me by the shoulder. "Meredith, what the fuck is she talking about?"

No matter what I said or kept quiet, the whole school would know every step of this conversation by lunch tomorrow. I was so blindsided, not one single idea came to mind for damage control.

"I—" I cleared my throat; it did not dispel the knot there. "I—last December, I—"

"Oh, god. It's true?" Lily gasped. "She's not lying?"

"Sirius found me. He ended things with me afterwards. He said—"

I wouldn't share what he said last week where Marlene could hear. Or Mary, the second worst gossip of our class. This was a disaster. My throat was so dry it was like I'd swallowed sand.

"James doesn't know," I managed to say instead. "I don't—he cannot know. Or anyone else, for that matter. It could ruin me. Please."

"Alright!" Lily assured. Her bottom lip was bitten raw. "We won't tell anyone, right?"

Marlene nodded so fast the bun on her head came loose. Dorcas kept quiet, her face a thunderous scowl, but I wasn't worried. She was the one I should have gone to in the first place.

"I won't say," Mary said. "I shouldn't have even known. This is terrible, I'm so sorry."

I gave her a weak smile, grateful but not too hopeful. Most of the gossip Mary spread, she did without meaning to, because she spoke before thought.

"I'm going to go to bed," she continued. "Give you some space. Mar, come."

She tugged at Marlene's elbow. Marlene refused to move, pleading at me with wide glistening eyes. With a flick of my wand, I ended the silencing charm that had taken away her voice.

She gasped, as if short of breath. "Meredith, really, I—"

"We're done." I interrupted her. "Whatever friendship there was between us ends today. Not because of Sirius Black, in case you missed it. You can keep him forever, I don't give two shits."

Marlene actually had the gall to start crying.

"That's so unfair, Mer." She sniffled. "It was an accident, it just slipped!"

Lily joined Mary by Marlene's other side, gently guiding her away. I got the impression it was less because she sympathized, and more an attempt to deescalate.

"It's late, we're tired," she was saying as she and Mary manoeuvred Marlene to the bathroom. "Let's leave this for another day..."

Her voice faded as the bathroom door shut behind them. Dorcas took a seat beside me.

"Do you want to talk about it now?" She asked after a moment of the two of just staring at each other. "Or tomorrow?"

"I'd rather not talk about it at all, actually."

She huffed. "Shocker."

I laughed, swaying so our shoulders knocked together. Her arm went around my back at the same time I looped mine around her waist.

"Would it make you feel better to know I am no longer suicidal?"

"Not really, no." She muttered. "I'm going to set his hair on fire."

The threat sent a twinge of worry through my chest. Mostly because I knew she might carry through with it.

"I wasn't entirely fair to him, Dorcas." I admitted. "I didn't—I just told him to wait a little while because I was going to shower and then..." I trailed off. "He regrets the way he handled it very much."

"I don't care what he feels!" Dorcas's scoff ruffled my hair. "Merlin, I can't believe—I take back everything I have ever said about how you're always mean to him. Never stop, actually."

Her fierceness brought a smile to my face. Dorcas may not have been as open with her affections as Lily, who was always at the ready with an I love you or wish you were here, but her protectiveness betrayed her. She understood my deliberate solitude a lot better than any of my friends.

"I will just for you." I teased, catching how her nose scrunched up as I pulled away. Right. Maybe she wasn't ready to joke about it, yet. "Salt in his tea, always a good one."

"Try belladonna." She muttered underneath her breath.

I snorted.

"Fine." Dorcas rose to her feet with a sigh. "I'll leave you to it. Just... you have friends, Meredith."

Her words were not patronising. They sounded a promise. I nodded, so touched by the words I struggled to speak. Always, I feared to speak of what happened with more than one person would result in severe judgement, alienation. Mother had always warned me against it, against the public humiliation that would follow. I never expected support, never even dreamt of it. I was a fool for having pushed Dorcas and Lily away.

St Mungo's Hospital's A&E was a chaotic storm from the moment one stepped foot in the entrance.

The wide doors opened to a low-ceiling hall where rows upon rows of chairs stretched. By what I could see of the empty ones, most of them were crooked, armless, and with patchy upholstery. Some of them hadn't even been patched, and the seat had frayed spots of fabric where tufts of fill peeked through. All of them had narrow wooden backs, looking more like they were better fit for a kitchen table than a place where ill or wounded patients may sit and wait. Those who waited sported miserable expressions and hunched shoulders that I doubted only had to do with whatever ailed them.

To the left of this sea of uncomfortable chairs, stood a half-circle counter with the angriest-looking receptionist I had ever seen. She stared at Freyr over cat-eye glasses with such disgust one might fear Freyr had come in covered in dung.

I couldn't hear what they said to each other, the noise drowned anything that was not said right beside me, and Addie and Cressida had taken the spot by my brother's either side.

There was a flurry of witches and wizards with the St Mungo's uniform hurrying about, wrangling unruly patients, calling after each other, shouting orders as they quite literally ran to and from rooms. Some patients in the waiting area had clearly been afflicted with mind-addling spells or potions, and they screamed in horror, or babbled nonsensically. It was overwhelming.

"Merry." A hand on my shoulder made me jump. Addie lifted her hands in appeasement. "Just me. Come on, Freyr's got a room number."

I swallowed, eyes still drawn to the mess around me. I couldn't help but worry a place where lives were at stake shouldn't be this disorganized. Or sad-looking. Or dirty. The lacklustre tile was worrying as were the scuff marks on the walls, and that one stain by the corner that looked suspiciously like old blood. At least it smelled nice, like candyfloss laced with spearmint.

"You don't have to come." Addie offered, hesitant. "He'll be moved to a proper room soon, you can visit then. It's not as disturbing upstairs."

"I'm fine." I motioned to where Freyr and Cressida were waiting. "Let's go."

We walked down a thin passage with glass doors on either side every three steps. Some doors were curtained, hiding whatever occurred behind them. Bottles of green and red liquid levitated above our heads and stopped in front of one such curtained door; it slid open like a window would and a harried-looking nurse with a splatter of blood across her neck and front stepped out to fetch them. The rooms were charmed to keep noise inside, but opening the door had momentarily negated the magic. The screams of pain that came behind the curtain were blood-curling.

Right. So healer was definitely scratched out of the list of career options. Blimey.

Despite the horror, curiosity was a morbid spirit, and so I glanced into each room we passed, regardless of whether it was curtained or not. Sometimes, I spied quick movements shadowed against the mint green of the curtains, quick but controlled, not as frantic as the receiving hall had been. Others, I made direct eye contact with healers or patients. The latter always grimaced or were quick to look away; the former scowled with disapproval. I was quick to avert my eyes.

It was as we neared the end of the hallway that I glanced into a room and made brief contact with a patient. The grimace we shared was but an awkward reflex. I hurried past—only to halt and do a doubletake.

"Meredith!" Addie yelped as she walked right into me.

I ignored her. Because the strange patient was no stranger at all. He was my boyfriend.

I had pushed into the room before I'd really known what I was doing. "Fabian?"

Fabian rubbed a hand down his face. I had a feeling the groan he let out was not exactly one of pain.

"Oh." Addie muttered as she caught sight of him. She sent me the look. "I'll wait outside."

She closed the door behind her, and then it was just Fabian, myself, and a disgruntled healer that looked like no one had ever barged into her examination room uninvited before.

"What happened?" I pressed, when all he did was rub at his eyes and mutter under his breath a long string of curses I'd rather not have heard.

He was sat on an examination table, shirtless, and trousers rolled up to his knee. His left calf was bandaged up quite heavily, but he was swinging his right leg back and forth so I assumed there was no injury there.

"Miss," the healer began, finally snapping out of her stupor, hand already outstretched towards the door. "This is a private room, I'm going to ask you to leave."

"Like hell!" I sidestepped her, chest burning with a fury I wasn't quite sure who it was directed to. "That's my boyfriend."

With the way I spat out the word, I might as well have cursed at him. Fabian sighed. The healer looked at him with a degree of scepticism that was, in all honesty, offensive.

"It's fine." Fabian allowed. "She can stay. Mer, come here."

He made grabby hands at me, only with his right hand, I noted. I did not move. Just stood there with my arms crossed, glowering. He sighed again.

"I'll bind your ribs now, then." The healer announced in a stilted tone, like she wasn't quite sure whether proceeding was protocol or not.

I watched her, unblinking, as she waved her wand in slow gentle motions. Lengths of gauzy bandage levitated from the table beside her and twisted themselves around Fabian's torso a little too tight to be comfortable. When it was done, she made him gulp down two potions that turned him a little grey around the edges.

"Right." She tapped his shoulder. "You're all done. Keep your weight off that leg, clean and change the bandages twice a day. Your ribs are on the mend, but it'll take a couple hours until they're fully healed. We'll release you then. I'd like you to keep the bindings on at least 24 hours, help with the discomfort." She said all this while scribbling away on a chart, barely sparing Fabian a look. "If you're in pain, you can purchase some pain relief draughts with your regular potioneer. Or make them yourself, but I am not liable if you mess up the brew."

I raised my eyebrows at that, but Fabian seemed to think it was funny. "Thank you, Healer Brown."

Healer Brown nodded. She spared him a smile, brief, polite, and impersonal, before she made for the door. I moved out of her way, offering her a slightly more genuine smile of my own, but it seemed Healer Brown was in no mood for chit-chat. Considering the busy waiting room, I couldn't blame her.

"What happened?" I repeated the question the moment the door slid shut behind the healer.

Fabian shrugged. "Ah, nothing, you know. I'm... clumsy."

My eyes narrowed to slits.

"Well, Wales turned out to be a little rowdier than expected." He corrected with a broad understatement. "Don't mess with a Welshman and all that... turns out, they've got a mean right hook."

He let out a weak chuckle, scratching at the back of his head. I pressed my mouth into a thin line to stop myself from snapping at him. Even if he was on the mend, he was still hurt. Welshman or no Welshman, someone had punched him square in the eye, already an ugly purple colour, and he had some cuts on the right side of his forehead. I wanted to hold him and kiss it better. Unfortunately, the constant and blatant lying was making it quite difficult to follow my more caring instincts.

"I'm going to ask you again." I took a step closer. "What happened?"

"I'm telling you!" Fabian protested, only to hiss, one hand pressed to his side.

Usually, this would be the point where I demurred. Played coy. I was sick of lies.

"So, I'm expected to believe that you getting injured on the same day as my father, who was also in Wales, by the way, not sure if you knew that I knew that, was all just a coincidence?" I tested. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Right now? Yes!" Fabian hissed. "Because if you're insinuating what you think you're insinuating, then you know it's confidential, which means I can't talk about it. And St Mungo's is a hospital, in case it escaped your notice, a neutral zone, and makes asking about the thing here in a public place where anyone might hear bloody stupid, especially when I can't fucking talk about it."

I was loath to admit he had a point. That delivery had been fucking abysmal, though.

Fabian stared at me, breath laboured as if he'd run through that speech instead of hissed it at a strange decibel where he wasn't quite whispering. He tugged at the hair on the back of his head, leant forward on one knee.

"Now, will you please come here?" He extended a hand, the switch in tone giving me whiplash. "I haven't seen you in four days and I miss you."

I uncrossed my arms. Fabian watched me, placid, as I took every step necessary to stand between his legs. I wasn't proud of it, but I considered digging my fingers into his side, right on his lower ribs where the bandage hadn't reached. It was a fleeting thought that disappeared the moment his uninjured arm hooked around my waist, his forehead pressed to my temple.

"I'm sorry." He pressed a kiss to my cheek. "I shouldn't have said that. I don't think you're stupid. If anything sometimes I worry you're too clever for your own good."

My hand went to his shoulder, rubbed slow circles until he relaxed under my palm.

"What—" I swallowed, unsure. Asking that before had only made him angrier. I didn't want him to blow up again, so I changed the question at the last minute. "Are you alright?"

Fabian kissed me again, this time much closer to my mouth. His arm tightened around my waist, other hand coming to tentatively rest on my hip, almost like he was testing the movement.

"You heard Healer Brown. I'm fine." He told me. "Worst of it was the leg, but it barely hurts now."

I looked at him, studied his face for any sign that he'd lied and found none. His eyes were clear, expression easy and relaxed. Colour had returned to his cheeks, freckles back to that lovely light brown.

I gnawed at the inner corner of my mouth. "Are you doing what I think you're doing?"

Instead of denying it or arguing some more, Fabian released a resigned breath. "Yes."

"Why didn't you tell me? Don't say because it's clandestine or whatever." I requested. "Please. No more lies."

"I—"

Fabian busied himself with the cuff of my sleeve, fiddling with the seam. I waited and wondered at the even rhythm of my heart, the absence of the dread that had accompanied me each time I toyed with the idea Fabian might be in a secret opposition group. I had confirmation, which might as well confirm that my parents were members, too. Yet I'd reached a strange serenity I could make no sense of. If anything I wanted him to speed things along so I could visit my father, who was waiting somewhere down the hall.

"Things are bad, Mer, really bad, out there."

The tone he used reminded me of that disastrous dinner at the Weasleys, how they'd explained the world to me in slow concise sentences, expecting me to not understand.

"So far the ministry has managed to keep it out of the media, so it's all very hushed up, but... if the rumours are reaching you at Hogwarts, it won't be long until they can't be covered up." Fabian explained with wide eyes. "I want you safe."

He thought the best way to ensure my safety was to keep me in the dark. Even when they'd been sworn to secrecy, I couldn't believe that would include the person he was planning to spend the rest of his life with. There was no need to share specifics, I didn't need nor want them, but he could have made me aware of the situation. Explained what he was doing and why. So I wouldn't be completely blindsided if he got in trouble, or hurt, or Merlin forbid, disappeared.

A pit grew in my chest, a void the size of a needle head which immediately began to eat, eroding into my lungs.

"If we marry," I found myself saying. Fabian's entire form jolted. "Will you decide that the best way to keep me safe is to trick me, and lie to me, and make me doubt my own mind?"

Fabian stared at me with a look I could not quite decipher. It looked like confusion shadowed by something else, which he was working hard to hide.

I was confused myself. Did he think I hadn't known he had asked for my hand? He'd eluded to the idea before, after all. My parents may not have confirmed it in as many words, but our conversation had been quite telling.

"Your father agreed." Fabian spoke after a moment.

He said it cautiously, like it was a reminder. I nodded.

"If we marry?" He repeated.

"My parents may approve, but I still have to say yes."

Fabian did not see that coming. Hurt flashed in his gaze even as his hold on my waist tightened. All the times he'd eluded to our future, I had evaded concrete answers. I supposed he'd taken that as blind agreement rather than hesitation.

"You haven't answered my question." I prodded.

Fabian didn't answer. He kept his head low, mouth pursed as he stared at his trousers. After a moment, his gaze rose to mine, his hand found my cheek.

"I'm sorry." He told me, fervent and soft. "I love you."

The breath got stuck in my chest. He had never said it before, not this directly. I almost smiled. Almost, because it was a lovely sentiment, but it was not an answer to my question. I extricated myself from his arms, gently pushing his hand away as he tried to follow.

"Meredith, what—?"

"My father needs me." I paused by the opened door. "I don't have any more time to waste."