Tricky Measures Chapter 15, a ncis: los angeles fanfic

15TRICKY MEASURES

Chapter 15—Uh-oh

"Kira, can I come in your room?" Anya asked.

"Sure, but why?"

"I wanna show you something, but just you."

"Oh?"

"Oh, yeah!" Anya said, closing the door. "I helped Papa clean out Mama's car! Look!" She sat on the bed, and then dumped out her goody bag.

Kira picked up a handful of the jewelry. "What is all this stuff?"

Anya leaned close to her sister. "I think Mama was a spy like Dedushka!"

"What are you talking about?"

Anya fished around and pulled out the gun license. "Look!" She handed the little card to her sister.

Kira read it, and her eyes opened real wide. "Oh, my God! What does this mean?"

"I think she was a spy back when she met Papa!" Anya squeaked.

"What?" Kira examined the card again. "It doesn't say that."

Anya shook her head. "No, but why else would she have a gun license?"

"I don't know. Maybe we should ask her?"

"Oh, no, no! I think she'd faint if she found out that we know," Anya said sagely. "What's the jewelry for?"

Kira shrugged. "Maybe she went on spy dates?"

"Oh, come on!" Anya shrieked. "Kira, maybe we should just give it to Papa."

"Nuh-uh. This is on you, Anya. I do not want to be involved," Kira said firmly. "Besides, it's Mama's junk, not Papa's. Since you need to give it to one of them, I'd give it to her. It's not Papa's stuff."

Anya gathered up her prizes, and put them back into the plastic bag. "I'll go ask her. Thanks, Kira."

"Callen, is it really totaled beyond repair?"

"Yes, baby. That's what totaled is. It means that something cannot be fixed."

She leaned on him. "This really sucks. I loved that car," Anna moaned.

He hugged her. "I know you did, but it can't be helped."

"I know, Callen. I just don't like hearing it out loud. It's too final."

"Oh, boy, Anna," he sighed. "I'm just glad it's the car that is final, and not you. That I couldn't take."

"I'm sorry, my love. It's hard to deal with."

He readjusted her, and she settled into her niche, putting her head on his shoulder.

"Callen, can we afford to get another car for me?"

"Sure. I don't see why not," he said, smushing her.

A soft knock sounded on the door.

Anna sat up and hastily pulled up the sheets, covering them both. She tucked their ends under her arms, and then sat up between his legs. She leaned back against him.

"Yes?" she called loudly.

Anya opened the door slowly. "Mama, can I show you something?"

"Sure, baby. What is it?"

"Me and Nikolai helped Papa with your car, and I found all this stuff."

"Turn on the ceiling light, baby," Callen said, "and then dump out the bag on our bed."

"Okay, Papa." Anya flipped the switch, and then upended the bag, and all kinds of things fell out.

Anna gawked. "My God! Where did you get all this from?"

"In the glove thingy, Mama," Anya said. "Did I do it wrong?"

Callen put his arm out, and Anya went right to him. He held her close. "No, baby. You did not do it wrong. You did a good job, in fact," he said. He kissed her cheek. "Anna?"

"It's my life's history," Anna mumbled.

"Say what?" He looked at her funny. "Anna, what is all this?" He leaned forward, squishing Anna in the process. He picked up a handful of the jewelry, and examined it closely. "Anna, this is good stuff."

"I know, Callen," she said.

"Anya, would you please excuse us?" Callen said. "I need to talk to Mama privately."

The little girl kissed her father, and stretched across to kiss her mother. "Okay, Papa." She kissed him again, and then left, closing the door behind her.

"Raisa, what's in Papa's box?" Nikolai asked her.

"I don't know. Mama got it for him," she replied. She walked around the carton, trying to figure out what was. "Do you think we should open it?"

"No! It's Papa's box!" He frowned at her. "Hey, Raisa, since it's a s'prise for Papa, shouldn't we wrap it up?"

"Oooh! Yes, Nikolai! Let's wrap it. Come on!" She grabbed her little brother by his hand and brought him over to the sideboard in the dining room. "You got to help me!"

Together, they pulled on the very wide drawer, and got it open. She could see in the drawer, but Nikolai could not, so she held up several rolls of decorated wrapping paper. She handed them to him, and rummaged around for tape. Once she found it, they ran back to the living room.

"Do you gots scissors?"

"No. We're going to have to rip it. Let's tape this side." She pulled a too long piece of tape, and attached it to the paper and the box.

Nikolai took the next piece of tape, and stuck it near Raisa's. It took a while, but they got that side finished.

Raisa stood up and surveyed their handiwork. Then she suddenly shoved the roll off the box, and it hit the floor, and rolled halfway across the room.

"Raisa, what are you doing?" Nikolai screamed. He chased after the runaway paper.

"Nikolaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" she screamed, chasing after him.

"Anna," Callen said. "'What's going on, please?" He put his hand in the bag and pulled out a handful of the jewelry. "What's this from?"

She looked away from him.

"Anna."

"No."

He frowned. "What do you mean No? Look at me."

She didn't move.

Callen stood there, looking at her back. "Anna, what is this stuff from? Your spy days?"

She hung her head.

He became confused. "What's wrong with your spy days? Anna, a lot happened back then, for both of us. It's not the end of the world."

"It might be."

He climbed up on the bed and sat beside her, facing in the opposite direction. "Don't go there. It won't be. It will not be the end of the world.

"Do you have any idea of when I first fell in love with you? We were all trying to catch Karposev, and Arkady was very worried about the girl he had kidnapped—"

She glared at him. "Karposev? How come I didn't see you?"

Callen shrugged. "I don't know. Probably because I was being shot at? Or I was running around on the Russian oil tanker? Or you were in hiding because you shot Karposev twice?

"Anna, that's not the point. I fell in love with you back then. Arkady had a picture of you on his phone, and I was smitten." He paused to regroup his thoughts. "Anna, I don't know how to put this, but I fell in love with you, and to be honest, I wanted you for myself."

Anna turned around so she could see him better. "Callen, all we did was fight."

He smiled his crooked smile at her. "I know it seemed like it, but we really didn't. Anna, we came on to each other, and you know it as well as I do. Why do you think I agreed to help you when you decided to break Arkady out of prison?"

"I don't know—"

"Anna Kolcheck, you. are. being. a. prick.," he said with a very visible smirk. "You know damn well why. Climb off the bed, please." As soon as she was on the floor, he pulled her into his arms, and lifted her face up. Then he stole a gentle kiss. After, he hugged her tightly.

She rubbed her face on him. "Callen—"

"Callen, nothing—" he began. "What the hell?" he yelped as he heard two of their children scream.

Anna grabbed her robe, and tossed Callen his. They got dressed in a hurry, and fled down the stairs. Anya and Kira raced after them.

Callen stopped in his tracks, and Anna bumped into him. She gave him a look, and then moved to his side.

"Guys, why did you scream?" she asked.

Nikolai looked at both of his parents. "The paper goed away."

Callen frowned. "Okay, but why did you scream? You scared us."

"Sorry, Papa," Raisa replied, "but the paper really did get away from us."

Anna studied the colorful mess in front of her. "Guys, what are you doing?"

"Mama," Nikolai began, "we gots to wrap Papa's box. A box that's a s'prise gots to be wrapped."

"So we were wrapping it," finished Raisa.

Anna stared hard at the box. She suddenly realized what it was, and began to laugh. She backed into the couch and leaned on it.

"Guys, this is too funny," she gasped. "Kira, will you go get a pair of scissors, please?"

"Sure, Mama," the girl replied. She went off for the scissors, and returned momentarily. "Want me to cut the paper, Mama?"

"Yes, please," Callen said. He was equally fascinated. "Anna, baby, what's this box for?"

She batted her eyes at him. "You'll see," she said.

The two big girls laughed. They couldn't believe how frequently their mother teased their father.

Kira trimmed the wayward paper, and rolled up the rest of it. Anya collected the shards and shreds, and put all of the paper into the sideboard drawer. Then she hastened back to the living room.

"What is it, Papa?" she asked. "What's in the box?"

"I assure you I don't know," he answered nonchalantly. He shook out his robe, and then sat on top of the colorful box. One knee showed.

Anna took umbrage. "Get off of there, G Callen!" she shouted. She pushed at him, but he didn't budge. "Off! You might break it!"

"Will not."

The girls laughed again. They watched their parents avidly.

Anna pushed on him, but Callen did not move other than to pull her onto his lap. She landed with a whump, with her arms and legs flailing.

"Ow, dammit!" Anna shrieked. She pried herself off him, and clutched at her side, glaring at him all the while. "You big dummy! I still have staples in my side!"

"Uh-oh," Callen said, looking at his girls. The littlest ones laughed at him, and the biggest one slugged him with her fist. "Ow?"

"I'll ow you!" she growled at him.

Nikolai wasn't sure what was going on, but he did know the word "ow," so he went over to his mother and gave her a hug.

"Are you okay, Mama?" he asked. He put his arms up, and she lifted him right away, and hugged him. She kissed his cheek.

"I'm okay, baby," she said. "Papa is a little bit rough today."

The little boy kissed his mother, and slid out of her grasp. He went over to his father, and climbed up onto his lap.

"Papa," he said, taking Callen by the face, "it's not nice to make Mama say 'ow.' You have to be nice to her because her is a girl. That's what Ms. 'Ronika says."

"I guess he told you!" Anna said before she collapsed into laughter. The girls joined her.

Callen laughed, too. "Okay, guys. Enough!" He lifted Nikolai onto the floor before he stood up. "Everybody knows that I did not mean to hurt Mama's staples, but I do have to change the bandages on them. How about all of you go sit on the coffee table, and I'll treat her."

His entire family sat on the coffee table. Anna smirked.

"Oh, ha ha," he remarked, grinning broadly. "Get up, bat, please."

Anna stood up and melted into his arms, and he held her close. Callen gave her a quick kiss.

"Anna, your bandaging needs to be changed anyway, so maybe get comfortable on the couch?"

She shook her head. "Not tonight, Callen. We'll show them tomorrow."

"How come, Mama?" Anya asked. She was very curious about the staples.

Kira studied her parents, and suddenly realized why they were wearing their robes instead of their regular clothes. She decided to keep her suspicions to herself.

"I'm not up to it tonight, Anya. I need to get to bed and stay there, please," Anna replied. She tugged on Callen's sleeve, and looked up at him plaintively.

He nodded, and hugged her closer than ever. "Guys, line up somehow, and then give her a kiss and a hug before I take her upstairs."

"Papa, what about the box?" Raisa wanted to know.

"Tomorrow," Anna said with finality.

"Oh, ma-a-a-a-a-n," Raisa whined, stomping around.

"Raisa!" Callen growled. "I already spoke to all of you this morning about what would happen if you mouthed off. Raisa, you have earned two days of grounding, and you need to go up to your room right now!"

"I don't want to!"

Hurt filled Anna's eyes. She had heard about all of Raisa's non-stop tantrums, but seeing one was something else. Anna put her hand on Callen's arm.

"I got this," she said. "Raisa, sit over here with me." She sat on the couch and waited. Her side ached.

At long last, Raisa joined her mother, and Callen herded the other children upstairs. Nobody dared to object because they did not want to be grounded.

"What if I don't want to?"

"Why, baby? Why do you want everything to be all about you?" Anna sat up straight. "Why? That box belongs to Papa. Not to you."

"Because I have to see what's in it."

Anna became offended. "Why, Raisa? That box is not for you. I got it for Papa. Not anyone else."

"Then why didn't you get me one, too?"

"Excuse me? I don't know who you are, but you certainly are not my Raisa Elizabeth. She is a nice little girl who hasn't been self-centered since she was four years old in preschool. When you're ready to be my daughter again, I'll talk to you. But, for right now, get upstairs to your room!"

At Anna's explosion, three bedroom doors opened wide.

"Guys!" Callen warned.

After Callen spoke, three bedroom doors slammed shut.

"Come!" Anna barked.

Raisa was glad that her mother went upstairs. She had no intention of following her. Instead, she took the TV remote and turned on the TV.

She scrolled through everything, but no matter how hard she tried, she could not get it to open an adult channel. Eventually, she became so frustrated that she threw it at the TV. The screen cracked, and Raisa flew upstairs to her room.

Callen looked at Anna. "What do you think she did?"

"I really don't give a damn at the moment," Anna replied. "But it wouldn't surprise me to learn that she broke the TV."

"What are you saying?"

"Callen, stop being so damn dense! I don't know what's wrong with our little girl, but she is fucked up somehow! She's rude, unpleasant, unhelpful, unfriendly, and generally disgusting to be around, and I don't like it!" she shrieked. "I want my baby girl back!"

Shaking, Anna burst into tears, and held onto Callen for dear life. She curled up in a ball, snaking her arms around him and smothering her face in his groin. She cried and cried.

Callen stroked her hair off her face, and rubbed her back. He felt sick because he knew he couldn't really help her except by letting her know that he was right there.

Nikolai burst out of his room. He ran right into Kira's room, and jumped on top of her.

"Damn, Nikolai! What happened?" She moved him off her, and then sat up.

"Mama!" he cried. "Mama scream!" He burst into tears.

Kira picked him up, and hugged him. She had also heard their mother scream, and it unsettled her.

"Nikolai, I think she is okay because Papa is with her. I also think she got upset by something," she told her little brother.

Anya knocked, and walked in. "Kira, I'm scared." She closed the door.

"Oh, God," the biggest sister replied. She held her arm out, and Anya went to her and hugged her.

"Guys, I think Mama is upset at something, and it hurt her real bad. I don't know if we can help Papa or not, so we better stay in here for now." She lay back against her pillows, and invited them to lie down with her. "Hey, Nikolai, will you go get some of your books, please?"

He brightened. "Okay, Kira! I be right back!" He ran off and returned quickly with a small armload of books.

"Thank you, Nikolai," Kira said, taking them from him. "Climb up again."

He scrambled onto her bed, and settled into his niche.

Kira went through the stack. She chose Chicka Chicka Boom Boom by Bill Martin, Jr. and John Archambault. "'A told B, and B told C…'." she read.

Nikolai clapped his hands with joy when she finished. "Can you read another one?"

"Yah," agreed Anya. "That was fun!"

Kira laughed. "Okay. Let me look…" She exaggerated the time she needed to choose the next story. She particularly enjoyed One Fish, Two Fish by Dr. Seuss when she was younger. "'One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish…'." she read in a sing-song voice.

"Kira, can we drink some pink ink?" Nikolai asked when she was finished.

"Maybe," she replied excitedly, "but not tonight. Not with Mama all messed up."

"Oh, man," Nikolai complained. "Kira, it's okay. I know Mama is messy right now."

She hugged him. "Thank you for understanding," she told him. "Do you guys want to sleep in here tonight?"

"Yes, please," they replied simultaneously.

Kira nodded. "Nikolai, will you turn off the light, please?" While he got up to do that, she turned on her old night light. "Is this okay, guys?"

"Sure," said Anya, turning on her side, and snuggliing against her sister.

"Yah!" Nikolai said. He climbed up directly onto Kira, and buried his face in her neck, and closed his eyes.

"Oh, boy," Kira muttered with a smirk showing across her face. She smiled happily before she closed her eyes.

Callen continued stroking Anna. He could tell that her cries were lessening, and he was grateful. He gently slid out from under her, and fled into the bathroom. When he returned, she was still whimpering, but sleeping. He decided to go check on his children.

He was very surprised that Raisa was by herself, and absently wondered why. He readjusted her so that she was completely on her bed before he covered her up to her chin, and kissed her good night.

Nikolai's room was empty, so Callen went straight to Kira's room to find his missing children. His heart caught in his throat when he saw his son sleeping on top of his sister. Callen leaned across them and kissed Anya good night. Then he kissed both Kira and Nikolai before he covered all three up to their chins.

Callen then wandered downstairs to check everything. All rooms were in utter chaos. Beginning with the kitchen, he cleaned up and straightened up the floors and counters, and the sink. Then he moved into the dining room which, by comparison, was prim and proper. He closed all the chairs, and then cleared off all of the paper goods, which he tossed into the trash basket. He washed the table off, and then shut off both lights.

The living room was mysterious as it was housing the big box. He walked around the box, trying to figure out what it was. All of a sudden, he caught sight of an unwrapped corner, and he snooped. He was dying of curiosity, wondering what Anna had bought for him. He sat on his haunches, torn between being fair and wanting to know what was in the box.

Not too long after Callen got up, Anna woke up. She was very aware that he was no longer under her, and panicked for a moment. She sat up and oriented herself, and then got up to go to the bathroom. When she was finished, she did wonder where Callen was, so she checked each bedroom for him.

Seeing Nikolai sleeping on Kira made Anna feel all kinds of special; she loved when her children slept on her. She felt a deep sadness when she saw Raisa. It upset her to no end, and it frustrated her because she didn't know how to fix it. She poked her nose into Nikolai's room anyway, although she knew that Callen wasn't there.

Anna made her way downstairs. She found him squatting by the box, and she held back a giggle. He clearly did not sense her, so she walked up to him quietly, and draped herself across his back. Then she wiped her face on him.

A huge grin crossed his face. "You're going to knock me over!"

"Will not."

Laughing, he reached around behind him, and patted her. "Get off, baby," he said.

She slid right off him and stood up. "Come."

He stood up and turned around. He hugged her closely, and then released her. Callen examined her face, and, although she was still tear-stained, her eyes were clear, and her expression was calm. He kissed her.

"Anna, my baby," he began, "my curiosity wants to know what's in the box, please." He picked her up, and she wrapped her legs around him. "Please?"

She laughed. "Callen, begging does not become you. How about we open it together?"

"Really?"

"Yes, really. I'm as excited by it as you are." She kissed him, and then wiggled to the floor. "We got this!"

"We do," he agreed. He stood alongside her and tried to figure out what was in the box. Then he looked at her. "Ready?"

"Oh, yes!"

Together, they tore the paper off the box, and then pried open its lids with their fingers.

"Oh, my gosh!" Callen exclaimed. "This is crazy!" With Anna's help, he pulled the ottoman out of the box. "Oh, wow!"

Anna laughed. She was thrilled with her gift, and thrilled with his reaction to it.

"It's the perfect color, too! Anna, this is awesome!" He scooped her up and twirled around. He gradually slowed down, and then set her on the floor. "Spasibo, moya lyubov'."

"That hurt a little, my love, but don't worry about it. Instead, close your eyes, please."

With his customary smirk, Callen closed his eyes.

Anna wrested the lid off the ottoman, and then sat back on her haunches. She waited with an identical smirk.

"Okay. You can open your eyes!"

"Oh, my goodness!" he gasped when he saw the lid. "It opens?"

"Yep!" She stood up. "How about we bring it upstairs and test it out?"

"Okay!"

"Shhh…shhh! Do not wake up the kids!" Anna cautioned. She turned off the switch at the foot of the stairs, and scooted upstairs in a flash. Callen followed her.

After they placed the ottoman where they wanted it, they got ready for bed. Then they lay down on their bed for a few minutes, until Anna had had enough.

She took Callen by the hand and brought him over to the blue chair. They stared at it, trying hard to avoid its lure. In the end, Callen sat down and drew her down onto his lap.

Anna flipped, and knelt, folding her arms. She laid her head on his shoulder, and then decided to wrap her arms around his neck. She hugged him tightly.

"Are you okay, baby?" he asked softly.

"Mostly," she answered, pulling her arms down again.

"Is your side okay?"

"Yes. Callen, it's not that. I hurt from Raisa, and I don't know how to make it go away." She shifted around until her ear was on top of his heart. Tears slid from her eyes, wetting Callen.

"Oh, boy," he said, reaching into the credenza for a small blanket. He wiped her face with it first, and then laid it on his shoulder. "My poor baby. I'm so sorry, but we will get on top of the whole mess, Anna. I promise," he added as he began to rub her back. "Shhh, baby," he soothed.

Anna cried hard again, and all he could do was hold her. He held her as tightly as he could without hurting her. After a while, Callen tapped her, and she turned over so he was cuddling her.

He took the blanket, and wiped her face again. Then he kissed her cheek softly.

She reached up and stroked his bristles. "I love you."

He gazed at her. "I love you, too, bat baby." He kissed her again. "Guess what?" He pulled her up closer to his body.

"What?" she responded, although she didn't feel like playing anything.

"The ottoman is perfect!"

"Yah?" she asked, borrowing one of Nikolai's phrases.

"Yah," he repeated. "Anna, it's perfect. My legs don't hurt, and I can support your whole length if I wanted to."

"Hmmph!" she snorted. "If you wanted to! Hah!" She deliberately turned over, and slid down his legs, resting her head on his groin. "Oh, this is very comfy!"

Callen laughed, and pulled on her. Anna twisted around so that he could cuddle her again. "Stop it, bat baby!" He smushed her.

"I will." She wiped her face on the blanket again, and then flipped over so that she was straddling on him in her favorite place. His bristles teased her forehead. Anna sagged down until her ear was over his heart once more. Its beat soothed in a way that nothing else could.

Callen flipped the afghan off the back of the chair and shook it out. He draped it over Anna and made sure that his legs were covered, too. He glanced at her, and saw that she had fallen into a peaceful sleep, and he thanked God that she was so peaceful. He shifted slightly, and closed his eyes. Callen fell asleep with a quiet smile on his face.