It had been a few weeks after Beatrice visited Toby in his room after his beating. It was a Friday, just after school was let out for the weekend. While she was walking back home to start dinner, Tobias ran up to her. As soon as he approached she became alert at the sight of Tobias's shaking hands and short breath. Why was he running? What was he doing there? Marcus would be home any minute, work ended early on Fridays so they could prepare for the weekend community service projects. Tobias needed to be home, not here with her.

"Hello, Tobias." His full name sounded foreign on her tongue, but she couldn't risk using his typical nickname. Not out in public like this.

"Hello, Beatrice. Do you mind speaking with me for a moment?" She glanced around and was relieved to see no one walking around. Beatrice nodded and they walked towards a gap in the line of houses where trees and shrubbery grew freely.

"What are you doing here? Why aren't you at home? Won't Marcus be there any minute?"

"Marcus is going to be late tonight." Toby's chest rose and fell while he tried to catch his breath. "He told me this morning. There's going to be a meeting or something and he is going to eat dinner there." He grimaced while Beatrice felt her heart wrenched with frustration. She hated knowing there was nothing she could do to help. Even when she could sneak into his room to help after beatings, it didn't make up for the fact that his good-for-nothing father still beat him. It was unfair how he had to worry about what time his father would be home or whether he would receive a beating. His own fathers' meetings shouldn't be something that he needed to dread.

"Hey," she touched his shoulder gently, savoring the sparks that tingled in her fingertips. "No training tonight, okay? You need rest. If you want I can come to your room again and-"

"No." They stood a foot apart from each other. Too close but much too far at the same time.

Stop, I shouldn't think about this right now. Or ever.

What she wanted was pointless, but there was no use in trying to convince herself out of her feelings. She thought about him all of the time. All. The. Time.

"No?"

Toby sighed, brushing the side of her rib cage with his hand as if to reassure her. Heat shot through her core and all Beatrice could think was how she hoped her cheeks weren't betraying her with a blush.

"I can't have you risking yourself like that. If your dad found out, or if, God forbid, my dad found out, who knows what would happen. I don't want you to get hurt, especially if it is because of me." His concern only fed the heat spreading throughout her chest, though she tried to pretend it didn't by faking a glare at him.

"Okay, then I won't come to visit you. But we aren't going to train tonight." She realized how his brows furrowed and the features of his face had fallen. Whether his pained look was at the concept of missing training or the prospect of what later tonight held, Beatrice wasn't sure. She flicked her eyes away from his to focus on a much less interesting shrub that she couldn't be distracted by. "How about we go visit the meadow to hang out? We haven't been there in forever."

His lips tugged upwards in a small smile, though his eyes lowered to the ground. "That sounds really nice actually." Why was he refusing to look at her? Beatrice couldn't help but worry there was something more going on that he wasn't telling her. "But we start training again tomorrow. We can't slack off on it."

"Yes, yes. Of course trainer Toby." She stuck out her tongue, causing a small chuckle to escape his lips. His eyes lightened a bit, releasing some of the pain that seemed to weigh them down. The pain lingered as an echo, but she was relieved that he visibly relaxed a bit. Beatrice loved how she could make him smile and laugh despite how much there was to hate in his life.

"I should get home soon, Caleb is going to start wondering where I am," Beatrice said softly.

Toby nodded with a sigh. "Alright, I'll see you later then?"

"Yeah!"

He took a moment to look at her again, mouth posed as if he were going to say something, but he must have decided against it before waving goodbye and walking back towards his house. Beatrice took a moment to pause before she followed in the same direction towards her house. It was somewhat habitual for them to do this, never to be seen walking together in case anyone got suspicious.

Beatrice needed to tell him about how she felt. She should tell him, even though the prospect of those words leaving her body caused fear to bubble up from her stomach and threaten to explode. She didn't want to throw her feelings onto him, especially if he didn't feel the same way. Which he probably didn't. What if she ruined their friendship? It would be throwing away the one good thing she had built for herself.

There was the chance he did like her the same way. That thought was almost scarier, but also gave her hope for the future. She wasn't sure what would come from that but it was nice to think about.

Maybe that night was the night to finally tell him. They would be in the meadow which seemed like a nice place for it. She could steal food from dinner and set up a picnic. Especially since she knew Tobias hadn't eaten in who knew how long. They could eat and she could tell him how much she cared for him. And go from there.

Her house was in sight. When Beatrice walked in she found that Caleb hadn't gotten home yet. Thinking quickly, she ran upstairs to grab a pillowcase for the food. She came back down the stairs and opened the closet, scanning the shelves to see if there was anything she could take without anyone noticing. Rolls from a bag on the top shelf, apples from the fruit bowl on the counter, crackers from a box in the closet, and plates from the cupboard. The rest she would have to steal during dinner.

Caleb still hadn't arrived by the time she was done, so Beatrice took the chance to drop the bag off in her dresser upstairs. When the door creaked open she went back downstairs, as if she were just arriving and putting down her bag.

"Hi, Caleb." She began to take out the pans for dinner and he came over to assist her. Habit. As always.

"Hello, Beatrice." He said. How did he always keep his voice so monotone? "Here, let me help you with that."

They cooked dinner together, moving around each other silently. Beatrice found her thoughts drifting to daydream about sometime in the future when she could do the same with Toby. Soon enough, their parents came home and set the table for them. Beatrice took her seat at the table, said the normal family prayer, and began to eat. While her parents were talking to Caleb about school and his newest science project, she managed to slip her chicken into a brown paper bag she took from the kitchen. She slipped the bag into a pocket in her dress before continuing to eat as normal.

It was Caleb's turn to wash the dishes so Beatrice stayed with her parents to talk in the living room after dinner. Soon enough it was bedtime and Beatrice went to her room to 'finish her homework.' She put the chicken and some cooked vegetables she slid off her plate with it into the pillowcase and packed a blanket by wrapping it around the plates. Then, it was just time to wait.

Tobias groaned as he pushed himself off the ground and walked into the bathroom. His stomach flipped as he saw his reflection in the mirror and realized he looked like a mess. A bruise decorated his jaw and dried blood flecked off the skin around it. He used a wet shirt to wipe off his face the best he could and then re-wet it to place on his aching ribs. All the while he tried not to think about how much he wanted Bea there with him.

You can't think that, Tobias. That is selfish. You should be glad she is safe.

Right. That's why he made her train with him every night. Risking her safety and for what? Him? He moved to wipe off his back and hissed in pain when the cloth touched the raw welts.

You can do it. Right after this, you can go to the meadow with Bea.

Knowing that she would be waiting for him thereafter his beating was the only thing that had kept Tobias from succumbing to the black dots filling his vision.

He needed to tell Bea that night about how he felt. It was cruel to keep it from her. But then again, maybe it would be cruel to tell her. Especially since she probably didn't feel the same way. He could just stuff his feelings for her into a hole in the back of his mind and they could continue being friends for however long.

But that wasn't realistic, and he knew that. He would continue to feel the butterflies when he thought of her, the electric feeling when they touched, and the warm feeling in his stomach when she talked to him. The reasonable thing was to tell her the truth. That he loved her and had for a year now but was too cowardly to tell her. It was only fair he told her so she could choose what she wanted to do. She could reject him and think his feelings were disgusting and fear any closeness with him. Or, by some miracle, she could feel the same way towards him.

What would that even mean for them?

Too soon. One step at a time, Tobias.

He needed to tell her. He might as well do it tonight while they were in the meadow. It was as good a time as any.

He managed to finish cleaning himself up a reasonable amount by midnight and grabbed a random shirt before climbing out his window. The pain from his beating dulled when he saw Bea waiting for him on the road between their houses. Nausea from his pain was replaced with a warm, fuzzy feeling and a smile.

"Hey," Bea whispered. She seemed to be out of breath and he noticed a trickle of sweat run down her forehead. He squeezed her arm lightly, hoping that it would come off as nothing more than a greeting and not as desperation to be close to her.

"Hey." He looked her over, trying not to linger too long. "Have you been running without me?" He was teasing, but his curiosity was genuine. Bea blushed.

"Maybe." She teased back, a smirk on her lips. "Come on, let's hurry." Tobias raised his eyebrows, his curiosity increasing.

"Why are you in such a hurry tonight, Bea?" It was less of a question and more like him commenting on her eagerness.

"Come onnnnnn. If you hurry up you'll find out sooner."