Training was different now, but somehow still the same. Toby and Beatrice continued to train every night, all the while pushing each other to be better and get stronger. Their newfound relationship shifted the atmosphere in the training room so now it felt almost more open. At least, for Beatrice, it felt like there was more trust between them. This trust almost felt like a guide when they worked out together, helping them work around and with each other more smoothly than before. It didn't hurt that she might get a quick peck or shoulder squeeze between workout sets or after she hit the target well.

Training was different now. But good different. A different she could get used to.

They had also found new times they could see each other outside of training. Before school, after school, taking any chance to spend even five minutes together. It was their attempt at making up for the fact that they had to hide what they had between them from everyone else. Whenever Marcus had meetings she would help Tobias make dinner. It was easy enough to explain to her parents, they were more than willing to let her assist him. She was actually praised for the idea. Not that praise was supposed to matter to Abnegation. Tris and Toby were worried it would seem suspicious, but no one seemed to give it a second thought. If Tobias didn't want her to help him after his beatings, she figured the least she could do was be there with him before.

Before, he had mentioned that thinking about her distracted him from the pain during the beatings. Memories of the two of them were enough to at least dull the pain, so Beatrice was determined to give him as much material to work with as possible.

He still seemed nervous at the possibility of them being caught. Of course, they left the kissing and more intimate touches for the safety of darkness. But a gentle brush of the back here, head rested the shoulder there, those things were easily hidden. Tobias was worried about it originally, but after the first week or so he began to ease up. It seemed, at least, he had realized what she had, that no one gave them a second thought because they didn't want to inconvenience anyone. Typical Abnegation.

It was Saturday night. They typically trained their normal amount on Fridays and Saturdays and then hung out for an extra hour or so since Beatrice didn't have school the next morning. It was the same schedule they did during the summer. Beatrice had come to savor these moments with Toby. They were special. Which was why her stomach was filled with butterflies and anticipation just like it always was before she saw him.

She was standing in the typical spot alongside her house, waiting for him to come and meet her. Even though all of the lights in the city were off she still didn't like the thought of standing in between their houses. Just in case.

A hand wrapped around her waist, causing her to jump in surprise. Before she could say anything Tobias pulled her to his chest in a hug. She giggled, butterflies flying from her stomach into her chest and her throat. He kissed the top of her head, letting them rest in that position together for a moment. Beatrice sighed in relaxation, feeling safe and cared for. Feeling at home.

"Hi, Bea."

"Hello, Toby." Beatrice twisted around so that she was looking up at his face. He still had his arms wrapped around her.

"How are you doing?"

"Better, now." She squinted at him, "How are you doing?"

"A bit sore, but alright." He pulled her closer, "I'm glad you're here."

"Of course I'm here." She said, raising her fingers to caress his cheek.

"It just," he paused, searching for the right words, "it means a lot that you are always here. You never let me down. It's nice having someone I can trust like that."

She burrowed her head into his chest, trying to soak up the warmth from his body to fight the chill of winter. "I'll always be there for your Toby. I'm not going anywhere."

"I hope not." He laid his head on hers, rocking them slightly back and forth. "I want this, us, always."

"And you'll have it. Forever." She pushed herself on her tiptoes to give him a quick kiss. "Let's get going so we can warm up in the training room." Beatrice shivered once Tobias let go of holding her. They started jogging towards the training room. She relished in how running made her feel strong, especially when she thought back to the first time training when she could hardly catch her breath after jogging. Now it was freeing. Especially when the wind blew through her hair and she could feel her leg muscles tense and relax with every stride.

They trained like usual, falling into their normal routine. The strain in her muscles was comforting in its familiarity. Beatrice had come to love the sound of her fists pounding against the punching bag's leather and knives hitting the target. They were the sounds of her freedom and of her finding herself. This was what she was meant to be doing. This was what she was meant to be doing. Not community service or serving others all day every day.

They finished the normal reps of their exercises and came to sit on the sparring rink. Over time they had brought blankets and pillows to the training room so that during this time they could cuddle together in them. It was a great decision, one that Beatrice found herself often being thankful for.

Toby had his arm wrapped around her back, pulling her close to his side. She rested her head on his shoulder while she caught her breath and felt the adrenaline drain from her body.

"Did you really mean it when you said I would have us always?" Toby asked quietly.

"Yes, I did." Beatrice put her hand on his thigh, rubbing it reassuringly. "Forever and always, remember?"

"I remember." He shook his head. "I've never had anything forever and always. I guess it's just, it's hard for me to trust or believe that it actually is true. It's not your fault. At all. I promise."

"I believe you, Toby." Beatrice twisted herself around to face him while pulling the blanket tighter around her. She held his face in her hands, taking note of the sad and conflicted look in his eyes. "I can be your forever. I can show you what that looks like. I want to."

"You don't have to-"

"I know." She pressed her forehead to his. They were breathing the same air, their lips mere centimeters apart. "It's my choice. It's always my choice. You are my choice, Tobias."

Beatrice felt wetness drip between their cheeks but chose not to say anything about it.

"Thank you." His voice was choked up and full of emotion. She was glad that he felt safe enough to be vulnerable with his emotions like he was around her. He had told her it wasn't easy for him to let down his guard, so it was touching whenever he did. It also was relieving to know that he had some outlet and place to feel emotions because it certainly wasn't possible at his house

"I love you." The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. She had been thinking about them for weeks, this felt like the right time though. Toby's head popped up quickly, accidentally bumping Beatrice's nose.

"I'm so sorry-" Heat flushed across his cheeks. Beatrice giggled, shaking her head.

"Toby, it's okay I don't care."

"Okay, okay."

She held his face in her hands, wiping the tears away with her thumb. "I'm gonna kiss you."

"Please."

And she did. Heat filled her core as she tangled her fingers in his rough hair. It was short, as was expected for all Abnegation men, but still so soft. He gently pushed his tongue into her mouth, deepening the kiss. He put his hands on her sides, pulling her closer to him. She gasped in his mouth, causing him to pull his head away.

"Are you okay? I'm so sorry-"

"Don't stop. Please." He pulled her closer, closing the gap between their mouths once again. He started to run his hands up and down her side, slipping a hand under her shirt. Goosebumps flooded her skin. This felt good. So good. She didn't know what they were doing, she just knew that she didn't want it to stop. Beatrice felt her hips move towards him, bringing their bodies closer than before. She felt Tobias gasp, causing her to smile. She loved that she could make him feel just like he made her feel. "This...this is good. No more. Keep...keep this."

"Okay." He ran his hand up and down her back once again. She felt him smirk against her lips. "I can do that."

Half an hour later, they rested against the blankets. She curled up as Tobias wrapped his arms around her and spooned himself around her body. She felt his chest rise and fall as he caught his breath alongside her. "I love you too." His voice was scratchy, but the emotion was clear in his voice

"You don't have to say it back-"

"I want to though, Bea." He nestled his head into the crook of her shoulder. "No one has shown me this amount of care before. You've shown time and time again that you're here for me. These feelings are real. I love you."

"I wish we could stay here forever."

"We can, in Dauntless." Beatrice smiled, thinking about the possibilities once they got to Dauntless. "We'll have our own place and can sleep together and eat together. We can spend our days together and just be us."

"I love that idea, Toby."

"Just keep thinking about it, Bea." He brushed her hair softly. "Two more years and we'll be there together."

"What am I going to do without you for a year?"

"I don't know. But we'll figure it out. We always do."

"Yeah."

"Don't worry about it now, though. Let's just enjoy this."

"Alright," Beatrice said.

And so they did. They stayed in the cocoon of blankets for another half hour before begrudgingly getting up and jogging back to their town of grey and secrets.