4 months.

There were 4 more months until she would get to see Toby and escape the thick, revolting suffocation of Abnegation. The longing in her chest grew with every day that passed; the only thing that helped was her training and, ironically, her beatings. They were the only times when she was able to distract herself from thoughts of Toby and Dauntless.

Sometimes, when her training was over and the cleaning was done for Marcus, she liked to sit and draw. It kept her hands busy and added another layer of distraction from her all too many feelings. She couldn't keep the pictures, of course, so they inevitably end up in ripped shreds piled in the training room's trashcan.

It was safer that way, without any chance for anyone to see it.

Tink. Her metal spoon hit the bottom of the bowl as she finished her oatmeal. Beatrice sat back in her kitchen chair, mulling over her plans for the day.

She needed to steal the necklace soon. Taking it the night before her choosing ceremony would probably be the safest course of action, but it was also what Marcus would expect. She needed to catch him off guard by taking it sooner. That way, she could hide it in the training room until the ceremony. If she took it during the day, Marcus would be away at work and she would have enough time to run to the training room and hide it there without him following her or knowing where she took it. It would be fine, the worst thing that could happen-

Actually, she wasn't going to think about that.

Might as well get it over with.

After washing and putting away the breakfast dishes, Beatrice walked upstairs and into Marcus's room. Even though no one was home, being in the room still made her skin crawl and bile rise up her throat. The closet that she had been locked in too many times to count stood on the far right side of the room. He wouldn't be dumb enough to keep it in there, so that was one less place to check. Beatrice checked each drawer in his desk, underneath the bed and mattress, and inside all of the dresser drawers.

She found nothing.

What if she just missed it? There was nothing to prove the necklace was even here in the first place. Should she go through everything again?

There was a bathroom connected to the room. She'd check there before worrying about going through everything again. There was a pair of cabinet doors underneath the sink and a few drawers on either side. She checked the top drawer to find it empty. She checked another drawer. Empty. Finally, the bottom drawer that held his hair clippers.

Something in the corner reflected back the overhead light in a familiar silver glint. Careful to avoid the blades, Beatrice reached in and pinched the cool metal.

The familiar weight of the necklace in her hand was reassuring beyond measure. Holding the necklace tight to her chest, Beatrice closed her eyes. If she tried hard enough, she could almost put herself back in the chasm on the rock with Toby. Only four more months, and a good amount of change, and soon she would make it become a reality.

Time to hide it for herself—what she should have done when she first started living here.

Visiting the training room during the day required her extensive knowledge of backroads to avoid any Abnegation or Factionless members. Most of the alternative routes didn't take too much longer, meandering through forests and empty buildings. It wasn't too long before she reached the training room. She opened the door and watched the lights flicker on inside. The air smelt familiar; of sweat and metal.

She walked inside and looked around to find an appropriate hiding spot. There seemed to be something on the training mat, and when she walked closer to pick it up she saw it was a note addressed to her from Toby.

My sweet Bea,

I miss you so much. I hope you are doing well in Abnegation.

I'll be here Tuesday night and if you want, we can meet up

and train together. I can tell you all about Dauntless and

we can spend some time together. I love you with everything

I have. Stay brave.

Forever and always yours,

Toby

Stay brave. Her fingertips fiddled with the heart-shaped charm. Once again, Toby knew what she needed without her having to ask. The next best thing would be to hear it from him in person, which could happen in just a couple of hours if she played her cards right. She would just have to make sure he didn't find out about Marcus.

He hid it from her for years, she could do it this once. Right? Hopefully, he would be too distracted to notice the signs he was attuned to—how she was jumpier than normal, she flinched whenever anyone got too close, and she refused to look anyone in the eyes. She wasn't used to having to hide them since she stayed at Marcus's house all the time. It would be hard, but she could make it work. They both needed to see each other too badly for her to miss it.

As long as Marcus didn't find out about the necklace, which he wouldn't, then she'd get to see Toby in a couple of hours. A weight eased off her chest at the thought of being held in his arms again, even if just for one night.

She decidedly hid the necklace in the supply cabinet and ripped the note, leaving it in the trash alongside her drawings. She left the room how she found it, slightly messy but organized enough, and walked to Marcus's house along the same route she came. She still needed to shower, make lunch, clean the house, and make dinner before Marcus got home at six. But for the first time since Visitors Day, her heart felt light. Marcus no longer had her necklace and she was going to see Tobias soon. It was almost too good to be true.

As soon as she got back to Marcus's house, she got to work on her to-do list. An hour before Marcus would arrive, all that was left was for her to finish dinner. Plenty of time.

Just when she took out the tray of chicken from the oven, Beatrice heard Marcus's key rattle inside the doorknob. Careful to place the hot tray on the oven, Beatrice made her way to the door.

"Hello, Beatrice." She bowed her head in greeting before taking off his coat and hanging it up with his bag.

"Good evening Marcus. How was work?"

"It was very stressful." That was never good. "Thank you for making dinner Beatrice."

"I was happy to help. You must be exhausted, please, sit down." Marcus complied and sat down in his normal seat. She sat across from him, as was usual, and waited for him to start eating.

Marcus always had her wait to do everything after him, which was probably to remind her that she was inferior to him. They ate dinner in silence, as usual. She wasn't allowed to speak unless he spoke to her first. Many nights he didn't speak, leaving her to untangle her string of thoughts. She had to make sure she didn't get caught up in her thoughts, in case Marcus asked her something. The punishment for her 'ignoring' him was terrible, not something she ever wanted a repeat of.

Once they finished their dinner, Beatrice picked up their plates and washed them while Marcus walked upstairs with a beer. She put away the dishes and wiped down the table and countertops and then re-swept the floor. Just as she finished, she heard the sound of heavy footsteps coming down the stairs. Her spine straightened, turning stiff as a board.

Marcus never came back downstairs at night. Normally she would head to her room once the cleaning was finished and would wait until Marcus came to see her. Worst-case scenarios began to spring into her mind. Marcus sounded mad, and when Marcus was mad, bad things happened.

Did he find out about the necklace? He didn't shave until Friday. Why would he have opened the drawer?

Please, be mad about something else. Please, you shouldn't have found the necklace.

If he found out, she was doomed. She wouldn't be in any state to see Toby that night, or any night in the near future.

"Looks like you've been busy while I was gone," Marcus said. The glint was back in his eyes—the same glint that was there when he caught her on the train—which could only mean nothing good. "Care to tell me about your adventures while I was away?"

"Once upon a time, I woke up in an unfamiliar bedroom. I went to get breakfast and all I could eat was disgusting oatmeal. Then-"

Marcus quickly grabbed the oven pan, which was now cleaned and dripping dry by the sink, and made to hit her. Instinctively she ducked, though the metal sheet still caught her forehead. Without hesitation, Marcus brought it back down on her head.

"What's that scar from?" Beatrice asked, pointing at a darkened part of his bicep. Tobias grimaced.

"Flinching. Marcus hates when you flinch. He made sure I wouldn't forget again."

"Shut up, you stupid bitch. You know what I'm talking about." Marcus growled.

"Ohhh, you want to know about the other story. The one about that boring and suffocating neighborhood."

Without warning, Beatrice was pushed up against the wall. Marcus's hand gripped her neck, not tight enough to actually choke her but tight enough to shut her up.

He'd done this before.

The thought disgusted her, especially because she knew who he did it to before.

"I can show you what it's really like to suffocate, bitch. I'm talking about the fucking necklace. Where did you hide it?" Marcus's jaw clenched tightly. Beatrice smirked.

"Somewhere you'll never find it." Beatrice figured he would be pissed regardless—it was guaranteed she would end up in the closet by the end of the night—so she decided to do something no one had ever done before. She spat in his face. "Take that, you bastard."

If she was going to be taken down, she was going down with a bang, not a whisper. Like Toby would want her to.

Toby wouldn't want you in this situation to begin with. He'd want you to stay safe.

Before she could feel guilty about endangering herself, Marcus tightened his grip on her neck strong enough to make it hard for her to breathe. Panic began to rise in her chest, but Beatrice tried to suppress it.

"You've asked for it, you bitch. You need to be taught a lesson. Apparently, your other ones haven't been enough to teach you anything." He kneed her in the gut, causing her to collapse on the ground where he continued to kick her in the side. Blood dripped into her mouth from how hard she was biting her lip to try not scream.

"I'm going to ask you one more time. Where is that necklace?" Marcus spat each word. Fire seemed to burn in his eyes. For the first time since Tobias was beaten for meeting with her, fear overwhelmed her.

"Like I said before, a place where you will never find it." She said, teeth clenched in pain. She braced herself for another kick, but it never came. Instead, she heard a knock at the door.

"Get up and go upstairs, you bitch. If you make a single sound I'll make sure you never make another."

Dazed, Beatrice nodded and pushed herself up. Her bones ached as she walked upstairs as fast as she could. She sat at the top of the stairs to listen, curious as to who would be visiting Marcus at this time of night. Most families would be settling down in their living rooms, getting ready for bed.

"Hello, Andrew."

What was her father doing there?

"Good evening, Marcus. Where is Beatrice? I would like to speak with her."

Why did he want to speak with her? They hadn't seen each other in weeks, months even. Beatrice had been under the impression that her family had given up on her and stopped caring.

"I sent her out on an errand a few minutes ago. She shouldn't be back for a while. How are you doing Andrew? Why don't you come inside?" Marcus quickly changed the topic. Smart.

"I am doing well, I don't plan to stay long. I just came over for Beatrice. We haven't seen her in weeks. I just wanted to make sure she was okay, especially since she isn't going to school anymore. Is she doing alright?" So they hadn't forgotten about her, they were just blindly following Marcus's agenda.

"Beatrice is well. She had the flu a week or two ago and is still recovering-"

"So then why did you send her out on a long errand? No wonder she hasn't recovered, she hasn't been given a break!" It was weird to hear her father defend her, and even weirder to hear Marcus be interrupted. No one ever dared to interrupt him. "Marcus, I agree she needed to learn her lesson, but her punishment wasn't supposed to be separation from society. We agreed she would still be able to visit for dinner and family time, and that hasn't happened once."

"That isn't my fault. It's hers, she keeps misbehaving and making it worse for herself."

Her father paused as if considering his next move. It was nice to be worried about, even though her father didn't know half of it. Or he did and just didn't want to let that on. "I'm revoking Beatrice's punishment."

"Andrew-"

"No. She is my child, not yours. Yours left for Dauntless, remember? I never should have trusted you with her in the first place. She can finish her punishment by helping Natalie with volunteering. I want her home by the weekend."

"Andrew, don't forget who is whose boss here." Marcus's voice became dark, similar to how he spoke right before he beat Beatrice. "I would reconsider if I were you. I don't believe she has-"

"What? Been beaten enough? Been used enough to satisfy your selfish needs? I know what happens under this roof, and I've stood by doing nothing for too long. I want Beatrice back, or I'll personally confirm Erudite's rumors."

Beatrice sat still, shocked. How could her father have known about Marcus for so long and done nothing? She had always known it was a possibility, but to hear him openly admit it was a different story. Why hadn't he spoken up sooner? He could have saved Tobias so much pain.

"Andrew, we've discussed this before. If you do that, I will personally make your family's life miserable. And your childrens family's lives miserable. I could have you all turned Factionless before you even make it back to your house."

"Please-"

"If you don't want that to happen, turn around and walk back home like nothing happened. I want to hear no more of this."

"Yes, of course. Good night Marcus."

"Good night, Andrew. I will see you in the office tomorrow morning." The door slammed shut and Beatrice scrambled into Tobias's old room. She heard Marcus walk up the stairs after her. All of the muscles in her body tensed as she waited for him to enter.

"You bitch!" Marcus yelled. Beatrice cowered backward, pushing herself up against the far wall of the room. "You told him, didn't you? Tell me the truth."

"What-What are you talking about?" She wasn't supposed to know about the conversation downstairs, so she had to pretend like she was oblivious. She wouldn't fool him, even if she hadn't told her father anything. He would believe what he wanted to.

"You know what I'm talking about. What did you tell him?!"

"No-nothing sir!" Marcus clicked his tongue, approaching her slowly. She was shaking. There was no way of telling how bad this was about to be.

"You aren't learning your lessons, Beatrice." Marcus hissed. "All I'm trying to do is help you."

Yeah right.

"Take off your dress, Beatrice."

Weird, he hadn't told her to do that in weeks. It was just a part of the routine at this point.

"If you won't tell me where the necklace is, I guess I'll just have to check for myself. Take off the rest of your clothes."

No. No no no no. This wasn't a part of the routine.

Beatrice slowly began to strip off her clothes. Her shaky hands made the task much more difficult, but of course, Marcus didn't care.

"Faster!"

"Y-yes s-sir." Bruises were already beginning to form along her side where he kicked her before. All too soon, she stood in front of him, naked. Goosebumps coated her skin as her teeth began to chatter from the cold.

"You look so pathetic. What did my son ever see in you?" Marcus walked around her, his eyes burning holes into her skin. "He always was a disappointment. It adds up that he would be interested in one."

Beatrice flinched, looking down at her feet. She wanted to be anywhere but that room at that moment. Anywhere.

"Get down on the floor, bitch." Marcus began to unbuckle his belt, causing Beatrice to freeze. "I said, get down on the floor!" Without hesitation, he shoved her to the floor. "You're getting worse at following directions, Beatrice."

She should apologize, but Beatrice couldn't find the energy or words. Marcus began to hit her with the belt buckle, causing her to gasp in pain. Her vision began to swim in and out, and the pain was almost enough to send her unconscious.

When her body felt battered in every spot imaginable, Marcus suddenly stopped. The room was silent for a moment as if holding its breath in fear of what came next. Marcus removed his pants and crouched down. Beatrice struggled, trying to push herself away from him but it was to no avail. He pinned down her arms and glared at her, a menacing fire still burning in his eyes.

"Maybe this will finally get through to you since you want to make a whore of yourself."

The chill of late-night air brushed through Tobias's hair. His feet hung over the side of the train cart; Abnegation was the end of the route so he had gotten himself settled in the train cart after jumping on. His head rested on the wall of the cart. A smile rested on his face as he thought once again about how he was going to get the chance to see Bea for the first time in months. The mere thought of it caused his mind to spin a million miles an hour and butterflies to fill his stomach.

What if she wasn't there? What if she had decided Tobias wasn't worth the risk and given up on their plan? She wouldn't do that, would she? Something had probably come up last time, the likelihood of it happening again was slim to none...right? She wouldn't purposefully miss a meeting with him, or at least, he hoped she wouldn't.

The worry that Marcus had her lingered in his mind, but Tobias shoved it away. He had checked last time, she was nowhere in sight. The room looked untouched, besides his moved dresser. Marcus didn't have Bea, she was smart enough to avoid him. The thought of her having to exist anywhere near him was enough to cause a shudder to run down his spine.

Fear, anxiety, joy, and anticipation all fought each other inside of his stomach as he jumped off the train and jogged towards the training room. He hesitated before opening the door, unsure of whether or not she would be there waiting for him. He gripped the handle and pushed open the door, watching the lights flicker on. The air smelt just like Dauntless, of sweat and metal, which had come to be a familiar scent that soothed his nerves. Tobias felt his shoulders relax a bit in the familiar environment.

Bea was nowhere to be found.

Maybe she was late? It had just turned midnight, so she could easily still be jogging towards the training room. But as the hours ticked by and 2 am passed, Tobias knew she wasn't coming. He cursed his hope, regretting ever believing she would come. It was so silly for him to get his hopes up, especially after the last time. Maybe she just wasn't interested anymore or didn't think he was worth the risk. Both understandable, but disappointing.

It would have been nice for her to leave a note or something, though. She said she loved him. He loved her. They were going to have a whole future together in Dauntless. What had changed?

Tears started to fill his vision as Tobias leaned against a wall and sat down. Was she still coming to Dauntless? If the training room was any indication, she still planned on it. If she came would she just ignore him? The thought alone was unbearable.

Pull yourself together, Tobias. This is stupid.

Nodding to himself, Tobias pulled himself up and stripped his face of all emotion. He jumped on the next Dauntless bound train and resolved to live the next four months as if nothing was wrong. He would be a perfect Dauntless member and focus on training to avoid the hurt the he held in his heart. Hurt that only Bea could heal.