"... Why ? Why do you want to join us ?"

…

That old man might be a problem with me getting into Pontifica Cohors. He seems to have some apprehension of me being a fallen.

Fair is fair, especially since I do plan to not be the kind of 'normal' member. And I kinda also want to leave it at some point.

"While I wouldn't mind such a thing, shouldn't you at least explain your thought process going into it ?"

Nice assist, Andoain !

"It's nothing complicated, I simply don't want to live on the street and die freezing outside."

Take that, something that strikes at your hearts to force you into pitying me !

"... I see. If that is what you wish, then I shall see if you possess at least one qualification. Tell me, what is your goal in asking us that ? Depending on your answer I might write you a personal recommendation letter."

What the hell.

Why would the seemingly soldier with fallen related PTSD be telling me this kind of thing ?

Me, the guy who is a fallen ?

Is it some kind of trick to make me hopeful and then fuck me up ?

Some kind of thing that will allow him any kind of instant gratification for the apparent damage my 'kind' gave him ?

Any kind of thing that will help him in his revenge against the fallen-

"Are you ok ?"

… Andoain ?

"You are shaking, little one."

… Ah… I was doing it again, wasn't I ?

"If you are not ready, then you can wait to answer Cassius. Don't worry, he might seem scary but he is someone with a big heart."

… Well, him misunderstanding the situation is good for me. I really need to subdue my overthinking habits.

… It's just 'that' that I have to deal with, after all.

Right..?

Then, something classic, that can get their heart pumping and get the waterworks flowing, a touching story of a hobo kid helping other to no longer be the burden he was before, to give back what he receive, with endoctrinement added to it so I don't seem like some kind of future traitor.

"No, I'm fine. I was just thinking of what to answer. I… I would like to get stronger. Just enough that others wouldn't take me for some kind of blemish here. Maybe I could help others enough that such things wouldn't matter anymore…"

… Please, make it my bullshiting work. At least I hope Andoain isn't the passing emotionless douchebag he will become.

"... I see, of course, that would be on the forefront of their minds…"

"Cassius, wouldn't it ..?"

"... Fine, I'll allow it."

..? Seems like they have something that would work well for it.

At least I should be able to get Andoain on my case to get them to accept me.

… I really don't want to have to get on normally, it would take years and with the church basically begging to get a justification to abduct me I really don't want to stay on the streets more than I need to.

Sleeping in the empty alleyways aren't the best ways to live you know ? Who would've guessed ?

Anyway, it all makes more sense to follow them and get a bed and food.

At least it'll be better than begging on the streets and surviving off of weekly donations.

"Follow us, you fal-... Kid."

Well, I can guess he still thinks I'm a nuisance.

Fine by me, I don't exactly need to have him in my good graces to survive there, just to do well enough that they won't throw me out.

In the end all of the things I need are mostly with those assholes, so I'm kinda stuck going there.

By those assholes I mean the Church. Well, considering how Andoain ends up and how Cassius is treating me I would also qualify them as assholes, but well, that isn't here nor there.

My parents being former members might give me better treatment there than on the streets, which is why I'm even considering joining an organization that basically hates my kind (the fallens) with a passion.

I should probably force the issue, the issue being what happened to my parents.

"Yes."

…

But not today. Forcing the knife deeper into the wound isn't the smartest idea right now.

I need backing, legitimacy and drive.

I'm just missing backing right now.

Legitimacy with my background, and as for my drive…

Well, if I could have some kind of 'childhood friend' relationship with the cast of Penguin Logistic, it'll give me a chance to defect somewhere if I fuck up here too fast.

Emperor is one hell of a backer, considering his political might.

Most people who would consider what I'm saying as bullshit, Emperor could make Signora Sicilia move, and more importantly, force the Wolfs to acknowledge his faction in their 'game'.

Gathering the losers might not seem impressive, since they were kind of desperate, but managing to force all of them to move, them being extremely prideful and inconsiderate to their environment, even if it was to allow them to act on their desire of vengeance, is one hell of an accomplishment.

… I'm rambling again.

And with that, came the end of this unnerving discussion.

Somewhere ..? / At the same time /

Right here, right now, behind the pristine wall of the White City, people are getting restless.

"... He refused us again. This is one of the most unnerving missions I have ever had."

"You shouldn't make it a habit, Cardinal."

"... I know. But it's not as if I can help it, I'm doing as much as I can overtly. Anymore and I'm basically dead, the Pope does not want anything to get out, and I understand exactly why. You too, should understand that things around here aren't the same since those two are gone."

"I know, getting him is the only reason why I need to do such a thing. Lowering me to… this… is the most frustrating thing that you could imagine for someone as great as I."

The prideful thing, such an innocent soul.

Someone who doesn't understand just what he is trying to unleash upon this chaos ridden land, underestimating the gravity of the situation.

"... In the end, forcing his hand isn't possible, the Pope owes a great deal to those two, and if I make a bigger move, the Apostolic Knight will hunt me down."

"I am keenly aware of this predicament, which is why I gave you two more months and gave you time. The deal I proposed is closing off… One extra week is all I can give you, because I needed him yesterday."

'Ah, if only she was still alive, I wouldn't need to bow my head to such a bastard.'

'Ah, if only he was still alive, he would've seen through all of this already and killed them all.'

'Ah, if only the Pope wasn't lamenting his little brother's death, this place would've been brighter than this broken thing.'

…

If only…

Marcellus didn't understand why he was the one approached by… them…

He had, in his youth, seen the world through his own eyes, understood the origin of the suffering of his people and became much more enlightened to the mission given to him by Him. After all of his journeys, he went and oversaw the churches in Iberia, allowing him to slowly expand his experience in managing the Church as he is doing today.

It might've been why he was chosen more so than anyone else, to take care of those problematic children.

That, in his mind, was the mission He gave him.

Thus he continues the journey, and looks after those misguided, even if it is to let them go afterwards.

You cannot save everyone, after all.

Just like those two couldn't protect what was most precious to them.

… Once he met the both of them in hell, he would personally apologize to them. That is the only path for his penance.

"Very well. Thank you for the extra time. I will use it wisely."

Hell was something he had already seen once, and he was keenly aware that it would be where his road would end.

After a while, we got to our destination.

It took nearly two hours while walking.

I think I blabbered enough about how huge this city was, but it really is freaking massive.

In the end I don't understand how that thing is even moving.

Like, how the hell do you manage that ?

I know originium is one hell of a resource but it must have some set limit, else things like breaking the sky barrier and exploring the icy north would've been possible.

There were 'things' up there so I might be wrong, but I guess I can't find more info about it now that I'm IN this world instead of out.

I learned a lot of things while scouring wiki pages for a dumb reason or another. It might've been more prudent to have learnt everything I could've but how the hell do you guess something like that happening to you ?

This is this and that is that, I can't fret over this kind of thing when the water has already been spilled.

In the first place, I'm sure some of the info I got from the wiki was probably wrong on purpose by the devs.

They had no reason to give us some of the info and purposefully hid some of it making the info itself worthless without the other part, I suppose it was made to make us more invested in the story but it came to bite me in the ass now.

I can't exactly ask about that kind of info too, since if it's correct I would be executed immediately for just knowing of certain beings' existence. Like the Demon of Sargon who are getting stronger the more people are aware of them.

In the end, I can't do anything right now and it all goes back to what I was thinking earlier, as long as I have the power, I can do whatever I want. But right now, I have neither the political power nor the physical power that would be necessary to force things, so I'll have to be content over this.

First thing first, get used to fighting with firearms. I have a gun, I should use it.

Second, learn arts. I don't want magic rock cancer but if I have to use arts to survive then so be it.

Third, make sure to have an escape plan, just in case. You never know when you'll need one in the first place. Having contingencies is the first basic principle in staying alive.

And finally, get political leverage. I know some state secrets. I can use that kind of info to get more info and use those to force people to bend to my will. Getting friends in high places also helps, even if it'll be hard.

Why ? Because Racism.

Yep. In this case it is the most literal I can be, we're different races, after all.

I could use semantics all I want, but I can't do shit about how others view the Fallens in the first place.

There are dozens of literal boogeyman stories about us, how the hell am I going to sound friendly when I have that kind of baggage.

So yeah, I need to either sway the public opinion in either the fallen or my favor.

I think the easier one would be to make it in 'my' then the fallen entirely. It'll be too difficult and I really can't be bothered.

"We are here."

Oh, my.

That is one hell of a building.

Barrack.

Whatever.

"I see…"

"I will report first, Cassius."

"Alright, go ahead. I'll take care of the kid."

"Mhm… I don't know, you might make the entrance test harder for him."

"... Are you kidding me ? Do you think I'm that petty to do that to a child ? One I have just swore to give my recommendation ? My honor is on the line here, Andoain, and I have no patience for your amusement."

"... Excuse me, this was in poor taste. I will go give my report now."

"Do that before I smack you across the face."

And with that, the guy fleed. He seems in a hurry, imagine that.

"... Test ?"

"Yeah, you'll have a simple physical test to check your condition. Since you've been living in the streets you'll probably be fine, you had to sleep outside and run from people, right ?"

Is he insulting me or praising me ?

Like, it seems like insinuating that I stole things, but he's also praising my physical capabilities ?

Is it some kind of psychological torture or something ?

"... Nothing of the sorts. I take care of myself and there are multiple food donations around. I never had to do… Unsavory things."

"I see. Well, the shooting range is that way. Follow me."

"Yes."

Step after step…

"..."

"..."

This is awkward as all hell.

"Will I be provided with a different gun ?"

"... Probably one of the testing ones, yes. If you wanted to use her gun for the test because of its ability and arts, tough luck."

..?

'Her gun' ?

"..? Did you know my mother ?"

"... No, and it's irrelevant."

No, I think it's a pretty important and very relevant 'Yes' that should've come from your mouth, knowing what the weapon was.

"We're here, kid."

"Can't you-"

"Cassius, since when were you in charge of finding talent ?"

"Does it matter ? Test him."

"Very well. You never were one for patience. Here, use this one."

"... Yes."

He handed me a small revolver.

"Six bullets, all that's needed. You are required to aim at least one bullet into the yellow circle, the rest can all miss, as long as you succeed once, it'll be enough."

That's… Not easy ?

If I were to guess the distance…

"243 meters… Winds 8.6 m/s going East…"

"..?"

Bang

…

Bullseye.

"... I see. His father's…"

"Cassius, who is he..?"

"Don't bother."

"... I see."

Click

"..? No, you only need one-"

Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang

… Bullseyes.

"... Is this good enough ?"

"... You shoot six targets, the other 5 weren't in your lane, you shouldn't have taken them."

Shit.

"Well, you did hit 6 bullseyes in a row. So it's not as if you were incompetent. As I told you, you only needed one. This is… Overkill."

"I see."

"You can wait outside, I'll give you a definite result after I talked with Cassius."

"Alright…"

…

"Jeez, that's really barbaric overkill. Thank God that the other trainee couldn't see that, they've been trying to get more than 1 bullseye for 3 weeks now."

"They are still at this level ? You've been too soft on them."

"Shush, you. You wouldn't fare better than me at teaching those kids. Yours is even too destructive, see right here, damaging equipment… Wait."

"..?"

"You…? What the fuck."

What ?

"Those were rubber bullets, how did he even ..?"

"..."

"Cassius who the fuck did you invite here ?"

"Didn't I tell you ? Don't bother."

"That doesn't explain how a kid was capable of destroying six STEEL TARGETS. They were 50 cms thick for fuck sakes !"

"I.."

"Moreover, wasn't that Her firearm ? I thought The Pope was adamant that her guardian gun was destroyed !"

"..."

"... What did you do ?"

"It wasn't destroyed 4 years ago. That's all that you are allowed to know."

"Allowed ? So this is under the order of His Eminence ?"

"Yes."

"... Fine. Keep me in the dark for all I care."

"... For what it's worth, I'm sorry."

"... Don't bother."

… Another friendship that lasted years and countless battlefields, broken.

…

Steel the mind, kill the heart.

That was all he could do now.