Chapter 2: The Impossible Loss
He continued to call her name desperately as the kilometers flew by, his coat having come unbuttoned at some point, flashing out the crimson underside.
His lungs burned against the dry freezing air, and his duo hearts thumped powerfully in his chest. For once, he was grateful for his ability to run faster than any human being, and for his respiratory bypass system, but most of all for the surge in fearful adrenaline his body provided. He had lost two of her echoes so easily before, he was not about to lose his original Clara too.
Finally, he spotted a large imposing figure in the distance which he immediately recognized as one of the robotic creatures. He swore between ragged breaths and felt his stomach turn in dread. He had been a fool to believe that he had killed all the creatures on the planet, but at the time he was just glad to 'escape from them now and think later.'
Once he was close enough, he could make out a struggling Clara in the creature's grasp. "Get away from her!" He screamed at the creature. The beast merely roared half-heartedly in his direction, and proceeded to stab her in the side with a long, thin claw. She let out a heartbreaking gurgle and that was all it took for the Doctor to snap.
"Clara! My Clara!" he rushed the creature, brandishing his sonic. "Leave her alone!"
The creature snarled and tossed Clara against a nearby column, an audible crack resonating clearly across the dimming skies. The beast reared itself up and let out a piercing shriek against its adversary.
The Doctor couldn't use his sonic on the creature just yet because Clara would be too close when it exploded. He charged straight up at the beast and kicked it squarely in the chest, a move he must have learned in a previous incarnation. It roared and swiped at him. A claw raked across his ribs and tore open his jacket.
The Doctor grunted in pain and threw his jacket onto the ground. He wasted no time in delivering a devastating punch to the creature's temple, causing it to stagger temporarily while he set his screwdriver to an even lower setting to stun the beast without causing it to explode. Once it was set, he stepped back and pressed the button.
The beast screamed in agony and lost its balance. The Doctor took advantage of this small amount of bought time and scooped Clara up from her crumpled position at the base of the column. He ran as fast as he could and set her back down gently in the grass a few hundred yards from the site before turning back to the creature.
The beast righted itself and shot a stream of burning acid from its gaping jaws onto the Doctor's shoulder. He yelped at the searing pain and threw off his torn shirt with the majority of the acid on it. Now standing shirtless in front of the robotic animal, he increased the setting on his sonic once more and pressed the button.
The creature cringed in a silent shriek and clutched at its temples. The Doctor darted away and threw himself over Clara. The creature exploded in a great bout of fire and shrapnel, and a loose piece of metal struck the Doctor across the shoulder blades.
When the blast had subsided into smoke and small pocket fires burning up the orangey-pink grass, he finally lifted himself off of her with a wince and a small moan of pain. Now with the firelight to illuminate her figure against the fading light, he finally got a good look at her.
"Oh, Clara." he choked out, the tears stinging against his eyes more than the gashes, acid, and bruises ever could.
She was limp and broken in his arms. He could tell by the way her makeup had streaked down her cheeks that she had been previously crying. A large hole was punched clear through her side where she had been stabbed and blood gushed copiously from the wound. More blood leaked from a gash on the side of her head that he couldn't clearly see due to the amount of the scarlet liquid. As he continued to examine her condition, he had to fight to keep back a shuddering sob from wracking his body. "Oh, my Clara. Clara. Clara."
One leg was obviously broken at the femur with a large blackened area, and the other had welts from where droplets of the creature's acidic spittle had landed in its attack. Her pulse was thready and weak, and by the way she was breathing, he could tell that several ribs were broken. He let a few tears slip from his reddened eyes and stream down his craggy face.
He was all too grateful for her unconsciousness as he ripped off the corroded part of his thin button-down shirt and packed the remaining cloth into the stab wound with wadded up handfuls of the soft grass in an attempt to staunch the bleeding. He gingerly wrapped her in his torn jacket that had escaped the acid to shield her from the biting cold. He carefully scooped her into his arms against his chest. He tried to ignore how her blood stained the crimson interior of the jacket a darker shade.
Her elbow jabbed sharply into his gash, but he didn't care. "I was a fool, Clara. We should have gotten off this planet as soon as we were able. This is my fault." A few more tears escaped his stormy blue eyes and he pressed a tiny kiss to the uninjured part of her pale forehead.
He pulled out the Tardis key from the jacket pocket and pressed the key tightly, willing the Tardis to lead him to her. The key glowed slightly, and he immediately felt his faithful ship's telepathic presence in the back of his mind flare up with worry. He felt a tugging need to go south, knowing it was the Tardis leading him the way in the frigid night.
He clutched Clara closer to his chest and sprinted south faster than he had ever run before, even in his previous incarnations.
"Please hold on, Clara. Don't let go. You haven't properly finished telling me off yet. You have a job to do, Teach. Come on, little pudding brain, use that stubborn will of yours and fight."
He leapt over boulders, weaved around columns, and burst through thick, partially frozen bubbles of the iridescent gas which were now a dark fractured color with the darkness of the night and the eerie glow of the single moon illuminating the cracks in the filmy ice.
Finally, the key became hot in his hand and the Tardis materialized into view. He sobbed a choked sound of relief. His Time Lord legs were not without their limits, and even with his ability to regulate his body temperature, the combination of being shirtless and losing blood was doing a number on him.
He felt Clara squirm weakly in his arms. She released a moan of pain, nearly choking on it. Her breath came in short labored bursts, and she huddled closer into his warmth. Shivering violently, Clara unconsciously pressed her ear into his chest so she could hear the comforting steady thud of his twin hearts. "Doctor?" she croaked out.
He gazed down at her glassy eyes looking up at him. "Just hang on, Clara."
She stared right through him and trembled, losing a few tears to mingle with their blood. "Am I going to die, Doctor?" she asked without a trace of nonsense in her voice. She wanted the truth.
The Doctor blasted through the Tardis doors and slammed them behind him. Usually the Tardis would protest at this, but given the circumstances, she merely let out a worried chirp and moved the sickbay to the first room in the hallway. Both the Doctor and Clara could feel her soothing presence in the back of their minds, linking them and easing their pain.
The Doctor ran into the sickbay, gingerly set Clara down onto the nearest bed, and immediately began hooking up various alien medicines to her. He removed her shirt and his makeshift bandages to better access the injuries. Oh God, she was so pale. The Tardis made sure to place all he needed on the table beside him for quick access. He plugged in blood bags, morphine, and antiseptics in short order. She hissed when he tightly wrapped bandages around her head.
"Doctor." she gasped, "you haven't answered my question." She grasped his bloodied hand and interlaced their fingers. He looked down at his hand and swallowed thickly, turning so she could see the soundless tears now flowing unashamed down his stern face. Realizing he might frighten her with that look, he put on a soft gaze reserved for emergencies only. He had to be strong for her.
She was the one dying, after all.
"I don't know." He forced out quickly.
She released his hand with a faint squeeze and relaxed into her pillow.
He continued to press firmly at the stab wound with a pile of sterile bandages, but the bleeding would not stop. The new blood he was giving her, his own in fact, which he had stored in the Tardis for emergencies, compatible with all types of human blood, was rushing out of her faster than it was going in.
The room was filled with silence save for the soft warbling of the Tardis around them. He prayed to every deity he knew that the bleeding would stop. He needed her. He needed his Clara. He could feel her mind screaming in agony, clawing at him like a drowning person, while her face remained blank.
She was slipping away. He could sense every moment of her demise has if it were his own. He knew what death felt like better than anyone and this was the verge of it. The Tardis sensed it too and the room darkened for the pair to be only bathed in the soft yellow glow of the surgical light above Clara's bed. He cursed himself, he cursed everything. He was going to lose her. He had pledged to keep his little pudding brain safe, and he had failed her.
"Doctor?" she reached out for him. She found his face through her blurring vision and tangled her hand in his unruly silver curls, enjoying their softness.
He continued to apply pressure with one hand, but used the other to clasp her free one. "I'm here." he choked out. Stay with me, Clara. I'm sorry for what I said, what I did. You never deserved that. I owe you everything." he felt his own injuries beginning to take their toll on him, but he ignored them. "I owe you everything, Clara. My Clara."
Her heart monitor's beeping, which he usually found obnoxious, was comforting in its every beep, becoming rarer. Clara smiled up at him, giving his hair a playful tug. "You don't need to fuss over me anymore," she wheezed, "I feel fine now."
The Doctor brought his face to their hands where they were joined and kissed her knuckles, his silent tears getting between their hands. "Oh my Impossible Girl, don't go."
She shuddered. Her hand fell from his hair. The hand in his became lax and listless. She closed her eyes and made a pondering face as if recalling a fond memory.
"Run." she whispered, "Run, you clever old man." She turned her face and barely opened her once wide eyes, "and remember me."
Her eyes slipped shut one last time. The heart monitor wailed, the Tardis darkened, the Doctor cried...
And there was that confusing smile again. Her grace unmarred even in death. That smile he once loved that conveyed happiness and sadness all at once lit up her face even in the cold darkness of the room. The Doctor released his hold on her side and fell to his knees.
Clara Oswald was gone.