EW-5206: A parody of SB-129 from SpongeBob SquarePants with Total Drama characters.
Disclaimer for the series: Some (though far from all) chapters will contain moments of nudity or underwear due to the canon SpongeBob episodes' plots and gags, though it won't be anything that wouldn't happen in TD or SpongeBob. Credits to another user on FF for letting us use their idea, and another for their cast idea who wishes to remain anonymous. Some episodes may also take massive strays from canon in order for things to work. Feel free to leave a review, follow, or favorite if you enjoy it!
Noah was in his bed very early in the morning, taking advantage of the peace and quiet by reading a book. However, some birds chirping played through the apartment's thin walls, causing him to frown.
"No matter how early I get up, she's always up when I am." He deadpanned, still keeping the book with him.
"Good morning, everyone!" Ella sang from her own room, and as usual, prompted some yelling. The princess let out an "eep" and apologized to their neighbor. "Sorry, Mr. McGillis!" The man continued his shouts of anger, and Noah knew it would end right there.
Quieter, she mused to herself. "I wonder if my neighbors would like to do something with me today!"
Noah just sunk into his book, but he then heard a knock on his door, and Ella's voice came from the other side. "Would you like to-"
"No." The know-it-all immediately responded. "Shouldn't you be at work today anyways?"
"Goodness, I would love to be there! Unfortunately, today is Sunday, so it's our day off."
Right then, an idea came to Noah's mind. "Hold on then. I'll be right out."
"Perfect!" Ella called, again in sing-song. "I'll go get Owen - ah, wake him up then! Usually, that's quite rude, but he's always happy to spend time with his friends! He's told me he doesn't mind. He loves to sing with me or blow bubbles or-"
The singer kept rambling, but the bookworm just took his book with him and ignored her. He made his way to the Smoothie Clean and entered through the back. He opened his literature again and went to read. What felt like seconds passed by, but it was probably a few minutes. He heard two concerned voices calling his name, being those of his neighbors.
"Noah! Where are you, my friend" The songbird questioned, looking in the kitchen.
"He's not down here!" Owen supplied, looking underneath a table.
Ella went towards the kitchen, prompting Noah to shut himself in the freezer. He looked left and right, but neither of them knew where he was.
"Perhaps he's just too eager to have breakfast and hang out! He may have beaten us there!" Ella brought up with a shrug.
"I like the way he thinks!" The big guy accepted the explanation.
The two left, prompting a sigh of relief from the know-it-all. "Finally! Now to get out of here…" He pulled the safety handle on the inside of the freezer, but it appeared to have frozen over. "Great. Now I have to wait for someone to notice I'm gone."
He put his back against the wall and the novel on his lap while he waited.
The screen faded to black, and the words "2,000 years later" appeared on-screen.
After the screen transitioned, Noah was now in what looked like a futuristic spaceship, although he was frozen in ice. He flopped over in front of a robot who looked almost exactly like the Ella of the present.
"Oh, goodness!" The look-a-like put her hands up to her mouth in shock. "A frozen homosapien!" She pulled out a hammer and went to hit the ice with it, but she then reeled it back and let a laser come out of it, melting the ice… and Noah's eyebrows. He screamed, jumped up, and held where his eyebrows used to be.
"To notice I'm gone…" He repeated in a trance.
"My apologies, but welcome aboard, primitive! My, that sounds rude! Ah… how about we call you… a historic relic! Yes, that sounds much more pleasant!"
"Ella..? Is that you?"
"Ella? Why, no, silly!" The girl's voice suddenly turned robotic. "I am Ella-Tron!" Now back to normal, she continued. "Welcome to the future!"
"What?"
"Welcome to the future!" Ella-Tron repeated, no ill will or irritation in her voice.
"Uh, the future, okay…" Noah looked out the window to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Everything looked silver or… no, chrome. A flower sprung up, but some guy in a red worker outfit immediately ran over and sprayed it with chrome paint. "Why is it all chrome?"
"Everything is chrome in the future!"
"Yeah, I see that…" Noah replied, for once not exactly sarcastically or rudely. He was in shock at what his eyes displayed.
"Mhm! And it was all possible thanks to my sisters! Or clones, I suppose! Ella-Trons X, Y, and Z!"
Three more Ella-Trons suddenly flew up next to the original one. "Are the rest of the letters of the alphabet involved here?" The bookworm asked.
"Of course! All 468 of them!"
He then got down in a fetal position and crouched forward, croaking out "future! Future!"
One of the Ella-Trons lifted him up off the ground. "Thanks." He muttered. "But look, guys, I don't belong here! We have to do something!"
"Singing!" The princess robots sang as a choir, complete with getting in a line.
"No, I wanna get back to my own time period!"
"Oh! Why didn't you just say so? It's the first door on the right! But be careful! One of them is a can opener!"
The bookworm went on his way, looking at the door. Very clearly, one read "time machine" and the other read "can opener." He decided to go in the first one.
He found himself in a room that looked somewhat like an elevator shaft and hotel entrance at once. There was green wallpaper and red carpeting. It didn't look the best, but Noah wasn't here to give building advice. "Well, if Ella exists in the future… then I guess I'll have to go to the past." He flicked the switch downwards, where there were two settings: "FUTURE" and "PAST."
The trip there was extremely bumpy. He flew into the wall and felt himself getting distorted, on the inside and out. Eventually, Noah went green as the ride ended, just desperate to leave. He opened the time machine door, but knew something wasn't right. Everything looked dingy, there was a foul orange-hued sky, and pale mist surrounded by fauna. It looked like something out of a history textbook.
"This place is more ancient than my grandparents." He quipped, only to hear the distant groans of some creature. Noah decided now was as good a time as any to venture out.
As Noah continued, some sort of salamander spat on his shoe, before hissing and scuttling away.
"Guess this was before manners were invented." Noah remarked, before tumbling off a small mound, finding himself in the mud.
He got up and was greeted by harsh and raspy breathing, seeing some sort of girl, with thick black hair, and very skimpy garb. There was a loincloth covering her crotch and two colored squares covering her breast, but that was about it. She offered the bookworm a leaf from a tree to cover the wound he didn't have.
"Uh, no thanks." The cavegirl grabbed his arm. "Yeah, that's my arm." He then felt some breath on his back and looked behind him to see a caveman, dressed just as poorly as the cavegirl. "Uh, hi."
The caveman breathed in his face, revealing some yellow, rotting teeth, and his breath was rancid. "Yuck!" Noah waved the smell away. "I think I should go now."
A small bird then flew by, making some chirping noises. The two cave people cowered in fear. "It's just a bird! I'm gonna go away now." He sat under a tree and murmured an excerpt from his novel, but he was again interrupted. This time, it was by the cave dwellers howling in pain. They were irritating the bird into pecking their foreheads.
"You're supposed to sing with the birds, not torture yourselves with them!" The bookworm scolded. "Listen to me!" He grabbed their faces and hummed, not that close to the rhythm of the birds. The two listened to him and enjoyed singing with the little birdie.
Noah sighed in annoyance and went back to the time machine. The prehistoric duo yelled in protest in their gibberish language, making him run into the machine. They got on top of it in a vain attempt to get in, banging on the time machine.
"Get me outta here!" Noah yelled, pulling the switch up and down until it broke. "Uh oh…"
It started vibrating wildly - even more wildly than the first time around. Eventually, a slot machine started spinning and had two 7's come up, followed by a BAR symbol. "You lose! Try again!" It said.
"This isn't a prize I was hoping to get-"
The scene cut to outside of the machine once more, where the prehistoric people were banging on it. Suddenly, the machine vanished. Back in the interior, the lights flashed red, then blue, then purple, then black, and finally ended when it turned white. He opened the door to find himself in a blank white area, looking startled.
There was nothing around him besides a few colored squares. He picked up a red one, but it took itself out of his hand and soon also vanished. "This seems like a place where I can be… alone."
The camera zoomed out, and the word "ALONE" appeared above him in a speech bubble. The word echoed around him as he laid down, but he soon felt unnerved once more as the voice started to sound less and less like him. Annoyed by the voices, he got up and marched away, but the voices didn't seem to get louder or quieter. He started going faster, but it still didn't make a difference. Noah started running, but he only looped in a circle, going off-screen and then back on three times.
"Okay there's gotta be a way back, I can't be trapped in this void forever, right?" Although subtle, Noah felt a bit of a chill on his skin.
He started speedwalking around the area, only for him to pop up in different places, somehow getting on the ceiling, before falling back down, and through the floor. He found himself back in the very thing he used to get back here. The lever for time travel was still broken, however. He groaned in pain as he got up, noticing the white chunks around and below him from the ceiling.
Noah tried in vain to mess with the broken controls. "At least in Ontario, it was tolerable! This place is trying to torment me! I wanna go back to my house and… I guess Owen and Ella!" He conceded, and as he uttered the singer's name, the controls suddenly jolted, making the time machine disappear one final time.
He appeared right outside of the apartment complex, where the big guy and princess were waiting outside. Owen's shirt was covered in maple syrup, but Ella had two takeout boxes in her arms, presumably wanting to eat with Noah.
"Hi, Noah!" They both greeted as the bookworm spontaneously appeared. Ella set the food boxes down and ran to give him a hug. For once, he didn't push her away, though he still didn't return it.
"Oh, there you are! Where were you? Goodness, I was so worried!" The princess exclaimed.
"Uh, nowhere? I dunno, but it's kinda…" The know-it-all struggled to get these words out. "N-nice to see you."
"Does that mean you'd like to sing?" Ella's face lit up. "My friend Noah has returned from his trip, and now he-"
Noah cut her off, his face going back to his typical unamused expression. "No! Who's the idiot that invented that stuff anyways?"
"You did!" Ella and Owen answered as one.
"...I'm going back."