First time posting in a while. I am obsessed with this pairing and somehow I managed to write about it. Enjoy my fun little AU before the new game comes out. I obviously don't own the characters made by Bioware. Enjoy!
The Anchor had given her some control over the Veil when she'd had it. She was able to seal the rifts in the great barrier between the spirit world and the waking world. She could even tear rifts open. The mark forced her into the role of 'hero', even as it slowly killed her. It had also affected her dreams. It hadn't made her a dreamer, she couldn't see lost memories or travel into another's dream but Evelyn had been able to exert some control over her dreams with the anchor. When she dreamt with the mark she had realized when she had been dreaming even though she wasn't a mage.
There were drawbacks as well. The Anchor shone like a beacon in the Fade, drawing the attention of spirits and demons alike. Thankfully, Evelyn had been so exhausted those first few weeks that she hadn't even dreamed. She'd fought enough demons while she was awake, she hadn't been interested in fighting them as she slept. Eventually, she did begin to dream and with everything that had happened to her, along with the mark on her hand that seemed to act like a lighthouse to demons in the storm of the Fade, Evelyn was swiftly bombarded by nightmares. Luckily, her resident Fade expert was a dreamer and had been able to teach her a few tricks.
Those fond memories of shared dreams were tainted with pain and sorrow four years later.
Sleeping in her childhood home a year after the Inquisition disbanded Evelyn knew she was dreaming. The loss of the mark meant she didn't have control over the Veil or her dreams but she could recognize her dreams more often than not. She stood somewhere in the Hinterlands; most likely the Witchwood given how thick the trees were. It didn't seem to be a memory, there was no blood or corpses of rebel mages littering the ground.
Evelyn gazed up at the trees, watching the sunbeams reach through the leaves to hit the forest floor. When she was aware of her dreams, her arm would always disappear. It always hurt more to think she'd miraculously been healed only to wake up and remember everything that had happened. She'd been left-handed as well, to make matters worse. Her year had been filled with relearning to do almost everything, including write.
She stood in the forests, clad in one of her oldest armor sets from her adventuring days. It had been white, made of nug leather. Nugs were among the few animals found in abundance around Haven so that was the leather used for her armor. The familiar daggers strapped to her back brought her a sense of comfort. The sound of the birds flitting between the branches breathed a feeling of peace into her. She took in the scent of the leaves and felt a gentle breeze caress a few loose strands of her golden hair that had escaped from her braided bun. For a short while, she wouldn't have to anxiously wait for letters from Divine Leliana about the spies within Solas's forces, her slowly improving penmanship, or trying to play mediator between her many squabbling siblings.
"Lethallan."
That voice made Evelyn's heart ache and the word choice made it feel like a knife had pierced it. It destroyed her semblance of serenity as she stood in the forest but it wasn't the first time she had heard it in her dreams, especially since Solas had left. She turned and saw him slowly walking towards her, dressed as he used to during their journeys together complete with the wolf pelt strapped over his chest. Were she not aware of where she was, Evelyn could've believed she was simply on another mission with him and he'd come to share some piece of lost history with her.
However, she was very aware of where she was. Evelyn's years of noble training kept her face steady, combined with the fact that she'd seen such an image several times in her dreams before. His face haunted her dreams more often than not. In the beginning, it had been agony, now, no tears soaked her pillow as she woke. She wasn't shaken awake by servants as often because she'd been crying out in her sleep. Evelyn had years of battling demons outside the Fade and in it. Whatever fear she'd had of them before the Inquisition had been slashed away by her hand.
"Tormenting me with his face has long since stopped being effective." She said, narrowing her green eyes at the image before her. "And if you're some friendly spirit trying to help me, it's not working. Please, leave me in peace." She gave the being in front of her a firm mental shove, just enough for it to know she did have some knowledge of how to defend herself and that she wasn't going to simply roll over. Ironically, the one who taught her such tricks was the man whose face this being wore.
"You still retain some control over your dreams." The creature bearing her former friend's face studied her briefly. It tilted its head as he used to whenever he was curious about something. "Impressive but I am not a spirit or demon, lethallan."
"That's what they all say," Evelyn said, rolling her eyes. "If you insist on pestering me, at least take off the costume. I don't have any interest in entertaining this charade."
"Evelyn." It reached out and grasped her wrist firmly, she felt the callouses on his hand from all his staff work. In an instant, they stood outside his cabin in Heaven. Her boots crunched the snow beneath her and little white flakes landed in her hair though she felt no cold. The dream sharpened and she could see the lines in the wood grain of the cabin walls. She could hear other voices as the people of heaven went about their business. A quick glance, and she saw the image of Dorian standing where he always used to.
"I'm here." Solas's voice broke her out of her stupor. Her breath left her in a shaky exhale and she quickly tore herself from his touch, her guard up. Even though she hid it well she was sure he could sense her fear. The last time they met he'd taken her arm and told her he was going to tear down the Veil (after they'd spent a year putting the damn thing back together), he took her arm (after being responsible for her condition in the first place) and said he was going to release the Elven gods and essentially destroy the world.
But what hurt the most was the realization that nothing she did mattered, she didn't matter. Fighting beside him, exploring ruins, fireside talks, and saving the world didn't mean anything to him. During the Inquisition, it had felt like he'd been the only one to see her, to see that she wasn't chosen by any God, that she wasn't special. It turned out she was half right; he knew she was not divinely chosen, but he didn't truly see her. He saw a shadow, less than a person. He may have said that he didn't see her that way anymore but Solas said a lot of things, many of which ended up being lies.
So why was he visiting someone who wasn't even real to him?
"What are you doing here?" She asked, tense as she looked at Solas with suspicion. "Shouldn't you be speaking to your agents, or preparing to pull down the veil?" She wasn't going to waste time with pointless pleasantries, especially given how he left things. Was this some bizarre goodbye to try and ease his conscience as he destroyed the world? Evelyn chose to ignore the brief wince she saw pass over the elf's face.
"There's been a change in plans," Solas said, retracting his outstretched hand and placing them both behind his back, a familiar stance. "I've thought about our last encounter, what you said to me."
Evelyn raised a brow at Solas. She'd said a lot of things to him. Most of it had been questions and some barely thought through alternatives. There had been tears on her end as well, at first from the physical pain of the anchor and then from the emotional pain of everything else. Her heavily lined eyes had made her tears black and impossible to hide that day. When she confronted the council she actually hadn't worn her typical eye makeup. It made hiding her distress at everything much easier without it.
"I will be conducting further research into slowly weakening the Veil, at least within the borders of New Elvhenan. I would see the people restored, though I will not burn down the rest of the world to do it." Solas said.
Evelyn's knees felt weak. "A-Are you serious?" She asked, her voice sounding fragile even to her own ears.
Solas's lips twitched ever so slightly. "I believe you said 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.' I created the Veil and unintentionally sundered the elves. Then I gave my orb to Corypheus so I could sunder the Veil and ended up helping to empower another mad would-be god. I believe it would be wise to not try a third time."
It felt like the weight of the world was being lifted off her shoulders. So much stress and dread that had loomed over her for a year was suddenly gone. She gave a shaky laugh, it sounded almost hysterical. "Would you look at that? You can teach an old wolf new tricks." She said. When Solas didn't respond she felt a sense of unease. "There's more to this visit, isn't there?"
"Yes." The minute shift of his weight was the only sign he gave that showed his anxiety. "You have no doubt heard of what else I've done since the Council?"
Evelyn nodded. "You've been leading the elves in a war against Orlais, reclaiming the Dales. My most recent reports said you've finally chased the last of the lions across the borders. You haven't made any further incursions into Orlesian lands but I've still heard talk of an Exalted March." Leliana had been doing all she could to placate her compatriots but their voices were getting harder and harder to quiet, according to her letters at least.
"I've heard rumors of that as well. I do believe I have a solution." His gaze flinched away for half a second before returning to her green eyes. "I'd like to propose an alliance by marriage between us in order to cement peace between New Elvhenan and Orlais, as well as any of the other human nations who may fear us."
All at once Evelyn felt like time had stopped. Solas could probably sense how she was feeling better than she could because she was feeling too much all at once; anger, panic, and fear but mostly confusion. She had so many questions and she needed a moment to settle on the first one she wanted to ask.
"Why me?" Evelyn held her hand up to stop Solas when he opened his mouth. "I'm not the Inquisitor anymore. I'm not the hero I used to be. I'm the youngest of ele-..." she took a breath. "Nine siblings. We aren't even the ruling family in Ostwick. There are much better options, even if you're dead set on marrying a human." Solas had never given the impression that he was interested in human women. Looking back on it she could understand his reasoning even if it did hurt, but she knew you didn't need love or even attraction to make a marriage work.
"Evelyn," Solas reached out to her, possibly in an attempt to comfort her but she took a step back and wrapped her arm around her waist. Even if he wasn't going to destroy the world he'd still hurt her more than anyone else ever had. She didn't want his pity or false placations. She tried to ignore how her name sounded coming from him, he'd so rarely used it. It was probably in an attempt to keep distance between them and make her seem like less of a person.
Solas grimaced but lowered his hand and put it behind his back again. "Your actions are still felt across Thedas and your name still carries weight. Having the Herald of Andraste by my side would be a great asset in promoting peace. I know you sympathize with the plight of my people and I also know you don't want more bloodshed even if you may not be on the front lines."
She'd hated the 'Herald of Andraste' monicker. Not only was she not a believer but she'd had Chantry stories pounded into her head since she was a child. She knew Andraste's fate and it was not one she was inclined to share. It also made her seem like some kind of divine presence and that was far too much pressure for her to handle on top of everything else happening. Going from the youngest daughter of a lesser noble to the only suspect in an attack that killed the Divine to being praised like some holy, otherworldly being had been a lot to handle in the span, of what felt like at the time, one day. She'd only finally had a breakdown in the privacy of her cabin a few days later once she felt like everything had slowed down long enough for her to breathe.
'Inquisitor' was a more comforting title, though only slightly. At least it had been through her actions and not because so many people were desperate for a sign that their faith was true. It had also been a lot of pressure. At the same time, she'd always felt like the leader in all but name she'd never actively chased the role. She felt like she was on par with Josephine, Leliana, Cullen, and Cassandra; like they were a small council of leaders, not that she was above even them.
Now the title that she no longer had and one that she'd always spurned were what was needed to again restore peace. It was a good thing Solas had such command over the Fade, Evelyn had a feeling her emotions would've attracted scores of demons by now.
"Evelyn," Solas's voice snapped her out of her thoughts. "If you do not want this I can find another."
Squeezing her arm Evelyn shook her head. "Don't worry about that." She said, forcing herself to retreat into her training and lessons. She was a noblewoman of House Trevelyan, she knew what this was. Unlike the Inquisition, she'd been trained for something like this her entire life. While she never imagined anything like this she just needed to focus on what she knew. This was a political marriage. She knew how to handle these offers. While she appreciated him coming to her first, tradition would also give her room to breathe and think, something she desperately needed.
"I will only consider if you ask my father." She said, her voice sounding stronger and yet emptier than when they first began this insane conversation. The image of the perfect noblewoman had helped her a lot throughout the Inquisition and it was a mask that brought her comfort now. "Things have changed a lot since the days of Arlathan. Besides," a small smile worthy of the court graced her face. "Should we go through with this my family will become yours. My parents, siblings, cousins, and all my nieces and nephews will become yours. I will of course adhere to Elven culture and traditions to the best of my abilities should we marry but paying respects to your future in-laws would go a long way."
Evelyn was trained for this. She just kept repeating that phrase to herself. Her hours of studying and lectures from both her parents and tutors had prepared her for something like this. She'd said as much to Solas once, at the Winter Palace. She idly wondered if Halamshiral had been torn down or perhaps been allowed to remain as a symbol of the victory of the elves over the Orlesian Empire.
She couldn't quite read the look that passed over Solas's face, disapproval or bafflement? Perhaps both. He'd most likely have to get used to it. If he were instead intending to marry a shadow maybe it'd be simpler but he was marrying a person with a culture, family, and story different from that of his own people, be it ancient elves or modern.
"Very well, I will speak with Bann Trevelyan," Solas said, seeming to realize that she would not marry him without her father's approval.
"Might I recommend sending a raven instead of appearing in his dreams?" Evelyn asked. Though the phrase would have been said playfully years ago, she had an expressionless mask on her face as she tried to hold it all together. "It would leave a better first impression."
A few years ago Solas would've chuckled at her words. Now he simply bowed his head. "I'll take your advice."
"We can work out the details of all of this should my father grant his approval." Though it would no doubt be an interesting discussion Evelyn had no plan on being in the same room for that talk, let alone taking part in it. A part of her felt it was pathetic, that she was choosing to act like a child and hide behind her father when she'd once led armies but that was the crux of it all; she didn't do any of that anymore. After so many years of being unable to hide, she felt she'd earned her chance to retreat, even if it was only temporary. "Now, would you be so kind as to wake me up? I have some letters to send myself and other matters to attend to in light of this."
'Please.' She thought to herself. 'I don't know how long I can hold it together and I refuse to cry in front of you again. Let me keep whatever shreds of dignity I have around you.' He'd already seen her at her lowest, she didn't relish the idea of him seeing her even weaker, especially after what he'd asked of her.
"Of course," Solas said. "I will see you again soon." His eyes flashed a bright blue. "Wake up."
Evelyn opened her eyes and saw the canopy of her bed in her home at Ostwick. The gentlest rays of dawn were peeking in through heavy curtains. Her hair was twisted into the simple bun she wore to sleep and her makeup had been removed. She felt the familiar silk of her nightdress, trying in vain to calm down as her breathing increased. The familiar way in which he'd sent her from the Fade evoked memories that caused her heart to ache again. Closing her eyes against the tears she rolled over and screamed into her pillow.