(I do not own characters. Original copyright of Naruto belongs to Kishimoto. This is just a fanfic, a theory of what I would like. App belongs to , please do not reproduce this fanfic.)

9 tailed fox attack

"They're dead."

"what?"

"I said, THEY'RE DEAD."

"Sarutobi...you're joking..."

Hiruzen Sarutobi stared at the dead, cold bodies in front of him. One being held by a jonin and the other one, the fourth hokage, still bleeding from a hole ripped clean in him, dead.

dead.

at such a young age. 24, to be precise.

I promised Kushina and Minato that I'd take care of their son, Naruto...but with all the hokage business going around here, I'll have to pass it to someone else.

he knew who, but the name was stuck at the tip of his tongue. Could the ruthless young Shinobi who had possibly bad mental health handle the kid?

No, hiruzen told himself. He wasn't always like that.

"I shall discuss this to the council members later," he mumbled softly to himself.

reluctantly he peeled the bloody hokage uniform off the ground with a huge hole in the center of the word hokage, which literally meant fire shadow.

even though the walk back to the graveyard was peacefully quiet, he couldn't stop thinki8ng about the young baby, which was gently being cradled and blanketed with the sleeve on his left arm.

the last thing I need right now is a crying baby.

but still, hopefully young Naruto won't be by himself.

*

"you summoned me."

"you don't know why your here right, Kakashi?"

"how would i know when everyone I know are already dead?" The boy said bitterly in his most freezing tones. "Anyway," he continued, "why am I here?"

"perhaps you've heard of Kushina's baby," Hiruzen started.

"I was their bodyguard...of course I'd know."

"well, their boy, Naruto has survived the Naruto 9-tails attack, and it is now sealed away in the poor boy," Hiruzen told him.

"Oh, well...okay, so let's get to the point why am I here?"

Hiruzen stared at the kneeling boy before him. "Will you take him in?"

Kakashi opened his mouth under his mask for a second before he replied answering "why me?"

"he'll never grow up with a loving mother and father.your the closest he has." Sarutobi then trie his best to put his words into ways that wouldn't touch the boy's bitter spot. "After all you've went through, it benefits both of you...right?"

"and perhaps I'll be given at least a week off of ANBU duties," Kakashi told him. "You didn't forget, Right?"

ANBU DUTIES! I forgot...The 3rd hokage started reasoning with him "I'm an old man...sorry I forgot...but yes, you will be relieved of your ANBU duties for a month and I'll take it up with Danzo,"

"All right then...It's a deal," Kakashi nodded, stretching his arm out.

Hiruzen also stuck his arm out, and they shook on it.

"NarUTO, STOP CRYING, FOR SHINOBI'S SAKE!" Kakashi roared at the baby that was crying so loud, he wouldn't be surprised if it exploded.

that just made the baby cry louder.

"I'm not really good at this, am I," he sighed, taking a seat on a wooden chair next to Naruto's small homemade bed he made for him. "Zhe's never gonna stop."

Just then, the baby let out a high pitched, ear-splitting noise that practically shattered Kakashi's eardrums.

"I FRICKING HATE MY FRICKING LIFE WITH THIS FRICKING BABY--SEND ME TO FRICKING HELL RIGHT NOW!" He yelled, but not even as close as the baby was crying--sorry, squealing hysterically over the top of the baby's huge lungs.

"I get it, you want milk. Unfortunately, I'm a boy." He said, plugging his ears which only helped preventing hi eardrums from popping out. Then he had a devious idea, which somehow drowned out all the noise it was making.

ramen.

he quickly fetched a cup of instant ramen, poured boiling water in it where he nearly burned his hand, then waited about 3 minuets which felt like 3 hours because of the screaming.

"hereeeeeeeee, Naruto-kun, come and taste some ramen..." he gently lowed the steam off the ramen, cooling it and held the wiggly noddles in his chopsticks. "Nice, fresh ramen..."

to his surprise, Naruto instantly snatched the noodle with both hands then gobbled it down without hesitation, without after effects.

"I didn't expect that to work," Kakashi mused. "But just to be safe, I could always ask Tsunade for some milk, that milker," and he could faintly imagine the women jumping out of nowhere, clobbering him over his head.

"why do they even make me do this stupid sh-"

"'EY! KAKASHI! HOW ABOUT A BATTLE!" And over him was Might Guy, who considered him as a 'Rival.'

"No, not now," Kakashi mumbled trying to act normal. He then heard a large BAM coming in from the room and a consecutive manner of crying and more squealing.

"WAS THAT A CHALLENGE?!" Guy yelled dumbly and ran into the room. "Uh, Kakashi, do you have a son? He's on the ground right now."

"this world produces far too many idiots," Kakashi murmured.

"hey, wanna adopt this kid for me?"

"hmmm...why would I? I what's wrong with him? You wouldn't be giving me him if he was good."

"he's...just not my taste."

"BAKASHI! Stop lying. Theirs no fricking way I'm doing that."

so far he had earned 24 'Bakashis.'

idiots aren't they? The whole world could be idiots.

or maybe he was the idiot.

Baka.

If no one wants him, I guess I'm stuck with him forever, he sighed, hearing a bunch of crashing sounds as the plates fell and the 2 year old jinchuriki climbed up the pantry to steal his instant ramen.

"NARUTO! GET DOWN THERE!" He yelled, annoyed.

"You're always so boringggggggg, Kakashi. You love the rules, why don't you go marry it?" And the boy started to pour tap water into the ramen.

"Why is it still cold?"

well, that's the 12th time he's wasted ramen...

"I. WANT. RAMEN!!!"

"I would kill off that kid for free right now," Kakashi murmured. I just can't disobey that stupid Hiruzen's orders.

BOOM. Crash. Another big boom.

Raining plates filled the entire kitchen.

why can't god save me from this mess?