I'll spare you all the usual mish-mash of excuses on why this chapter is almost a month late and just get right into the chapter. More rambling at the end of the chapter anyway.
We get right back to some spiritfuckery and where things get real mind fucky in this chapter.
With that said, let's get this chapter started!
When Kazumi entered the Temple, the first thing she felt was a wave of warmth come over her body. Her clothes had been thoroughly soaked from the rain and as she walked in, she tracked in dirt and mud on the nice clean floor. The veteran spirit navigator would have felt bad on any other given day for causing a disturbance, but after trekking through the forest in the dead of night for who knows how long, she couldn't quite bring herself to care much at the moment. But there wasn't anybody present to scold her about trekking mud across the floor.
Actually now that she takes a moment to look around, it didn't seem like anybody was present in this temple. The torches that hung off the wall that illuminated the temple windows that she saw from outside seemed to be freshly lit and showed no sign of going out anytime soon. But there was no sign of who lit them or if there was anybody in the temple to begin with.
No, that can't be possible. This temple is pretty clean as if somebody has been routinely cleaning it up day by day. A temple of this size would need at least a small staff to keep it clean and well-lit.
Kazumi thought to herself but it seemed like the temple was dead quiet as she walked in." Hello? Is anybody here? I am merely looking for shelter from the rain and my..." She stopped from speaking more as it seemed like the whole temple was deserted. She realized that Azula likely hadn't come here yet because there would be very obvious signs of her presence such as muddy tracks and rain drops.
The floor had been perfectly clean and dry when she entered, which indicated that nobody had entered while the rain was still raging on outside. Kazumi briefly considered leaving the Temple to find Azula, but hearing a crack of thunder outside made her realize it was pointless trying to navigate the forest with all that rain obscuring her vision. She just hoped Azula would be alright on her own.
Kazumi couldn't bring herself to just sit down and rest, her body felt too restless and needed to move. She chose to investigate the temple to see if she can find its inhabitants, as she pushed open one of the doors that led into some kind of hallway that had torches hanging from the walls to light the way.
The veteran spirit navigator cautiously walked down the hallway, she could see dragons and symbols of fire that were painted on the walls in honor to Agni. But Kazumi couldn't shake this odd feeling that she had about this temple, it wasn't just the fact that there was nobody present and the temple seemed totally abandoned despite its almost pristine condition. No, there was this strange...aura about the temple. Like her senses could detect the energy radiating from this place in a subtle manner.
And it did not feel good.
SLAM!
Kazumi almost jumped in fright as she heard the door to the hallway slam shut and the torches that lighted her way suddenly go out leaving her in the dark. The spirit navigator wasted no time pulling out her sword and lighting a white flame to give her some light but for some reason, she could barely see beyond her own two hands if she put them up in front of her face. She didn't hear or feel any sort of strong wind that could have slammed the door shut and put out the torches, so what could have caused it?
She didn't have time to think about it for long, as another light shined through the darkness from seemingly the end of the hallway. Kazumi very unfortunately didn't have any other options besides to go towards it with her blade in hand.
The light was so bright that it almost blinded as she stepped towards it, that she held up a hand to block some of it now. What could be producing such a strong light?
When she stepped into the light and came out the other side, she couldn't believe what she saw.
She was no longer in the temple, but instead she was stepping out of a much smaller building and into an open clearing.
But what shocked her was that she knew this clearing.
The...The Forgetful Forest?
Kazumi had woken up and seen this view more than a thousand times in her life, the lake was right there, the placement of the trees and walking a bit further she could see that the place she left was her own home. Kazumi walked into the open clearing, gently touching the grass and confirming that it was real...but it couldn't be real. It couldn't be, she was just in a temple a moment ago.
How is this possible?
Kazumi looked up to see the sky was cloudy as if rain was about to start coming down on her, an ominous feeling wrestled in her gut as she felt fear for what was going on. This couldn't be real, it had to be a trick or illusion of some sort. But everything felt so real, so how could-
" You are a disgrace to our family Kazumi."
Kazumi whirled around quickly at the voice, getting into a defensive stance as she prepared to cut down whoever was there. But the source of the voice was not who she could have ever expected.
It was an older woman with long black hair tied up into a bun, there were a few stray grey hairs and mild wrinkling that showed she was of age but they did nothing to detract from the woman's beauty. The most shocking part is that the woman had a beautiful face that reminded Kazumi of her own.
Her mother.
" M-Mother?" Kazumi could barely contain her shock at seeing her mother again, after so many years. And she did not look happy.
" How dare you call yourself a Spirit Navigator when you toss away everything that has made us who we are." A frown adorned mother's beautiful face, an expression that she rarely showed when she was still alive.
" No, no, no, you...you're not real. You're not my mother." Kazumi repeated out loud to remind herself. This wasn't her mother, her mother had passed years ago and she never would have said things like this. The last time she spoke to her mother was in the Spirit World years ago and while the conversation had been less than kind, her mother never would have said such cruel things.
" Can you even say what is and isn't real? Are you sure the grief has not driven you mad as you had thought?" Her mother shot back as she continued. " Abandoning your duties as a Spirit Navigator, tossing away everything that has built up our family over the generations simply because you let grief overtake you and you moped about for a few years."
Kazumi clenched her fist as she was angling between punching her mother and quietly listening. Maybe both.
" And now you come crawling back to claim the title after you abandoned it for years, for what? Because some girl you picked up wanted to play exorcist and you just couldn't say no?" Her mother mocked her as she hit Kazumi right here it hurt. " Did you become a Spirit Navigator again because you truly wanted to or because you wanted to live out your lifelong fantasy of finally being the master to an apprentice like you always dreamed about?"
" Don't you dare bring Azula or tradition into this! The girl needed help and somebody to care for her!" Kazumi shouted back at mother." You know as well as I do that I could not continue working as a Spirit Navigator anyway! How could I when my daughter is dead!? And your precious 'tradition' demands that there always be a master and apprentice from our line alone."
Kazumi knows in her mind that this isn't her real mother, that this is merely some kind of some kind conjured up to torture her. But some part of her still feels the need to defend herself from such accusations, be it because it is true or because she wishes to justify herself.
" Perhaps...but you cannot deny that your motives were not entirely altruistic, wouldn't you say?" Her mother's words made her flinch as she spoke. " You might not have thought about it at the time, but you must have been ecstatic when you found Azula. A poor abandoned and lost soul in desperate need of somebody, anybody to care for her in her time of need. Sounds awfully sweet, doesn't it? Is that all the girl really is to you? A replacement to the daughter you lost?"
Kazumi didn't speak. She couldn't find the words to speak for some reason, any words in her mouth died on the spot.
" No answer? I suppose there is no need then...stand in judgement of your line my daughter."
Kazumi felt the hairs on her neck stand as she looked around and suddenly the clearing was filled with people, but these were all women that Kazumi recognized.
They were all here. Her ancestors. The entire line of Spirit Navigators.
Thunder boomed throughout the sky as the first few rain drops started to come down on her, it was at that moment that she realized what day this was.
The day her baby died.
Kazumi turned around just in time to see a being made out of pure shadow charge at her, she barely brought her blade up in time to block the attack but was pushed back regardless from the sheer force of the blow.
" AH!" Kazumi gasped in pain as she was knocked back by the shadow demon.
" Thankfully, you won't live long enough to feel the weight of your sins on your head."
Azula entered the temple with a cautious attitude, trying to make as little noise as possible but somewhat failing due to the creeks the door made as it opened. The former princess without any delay got in and closed the door behind her, wanting to just get out of the rain at long last. She trekked in some dirt from her boots and her cloak thoroughly soaked from the rain dripped onto the nice clean floor which Azula couldn't really bring herself to care about. All she really cared about at the moment was just finding Kazumi.
But upon entering, Azula noticed that she was not alone.
There was an old woman by the entrance that was tending to a pot filled with some kind meal, but Azula very strangely couldn't pick up on any distinct smells that could help her narrow it down. The old woman had white hair indicating that she was maybe in her early or mid-50's at the latest, though her complexion didn't look half bad if that was her age and it made her wonder if this woman was also blessed by a spirit that gave her good looks like Kazumi. Though she was nowhere near Kazumi's beauty.
Her presence did not go unnoticed, as the old woman turned to her with a smile." Ah, a traveler! Welcome, welcome."
" Um...good evening ma'am, I apologize for the intrusion." Azula spoke politely. Kazumi had taught her that a smile and good manners would get her more than demands, a blade certainly helped too. Azula looked down at her boots that had trekked in mud and dirt." And the uh...mess."
" No problem at all my dear, it is certainly a heavy rain tonight. And don't worry about the mess, I can clean that up in a minute give or take." The old woman was surprisingly quite hospitable despite the fact that Azula was essentially a stranger who stumbled into her temple.
" Have you seen a woman come through here recently? Looks way younger than her age would reveal with long black hair and a small mole under her right eye?" Azula questioned the old woman on whether Kazumi was here.
" No, I haven't seen anyone all night. You're just about the only soul who's visited me in a long while child." The old woman shook her head, which made Azula somewhat suspicious. The tracks from Kazumi led to this temple, so either her tracking skills were much worse than she imagined...or the old woman was lying to her.
Azula decided to switch tactics and see if this old woman was hiding more than she believed.
" You don't look like a Fire Sage." Azula pointed out the obvious fact that the woman looked nothing like a proper Fire Sage.
" That I am not. Sadly, this old temple fell into disarray quite some years ago. I came along and rebuilt it the best I could, made it my nice little home." The old woman explained." I see it as a kind of place of refuge, rest for the weary and lost."
" For a place that is meant to be a place of refuge for travelers, it is certainly in an inconvenient spot in the middle of a rough forest. I doubt many travelers could find it." Azula spoke in a neutral tone, simply trying to prod this old woman.
" What can I say? Those who do come here have no issues finding this place." The old woman said with a smile." You certainly look like you've been put through the paces. Why don't you stay the night and continue on your journey in the morning?"
" Thank you but I would rather not. I will simply wait until the rain dies down before continuing on my journey." Azula's body felt tired from the trek, but she doubts that she could sleep with Kazumi still out there.
" If you wish. I can offer you some tea if you'd lik-"
The old woman was cut off when a loud crash came from one of the doors that was covered by red drapes.
" I thought you said that we were alone here?" Her tone was sharp as steel as the old woman seem to falter.
" We are, I don't know what could have made that noise?" The old woman seemed just as caught off guard as Azula.
" Stay here, I'll be back." Azula sharply said as she approached the room.
" Be careful, this temple is older than you know, in more ways than one." The old woman said but Azula ignored her for the most part.
The former princess very slowly and cautiously approached the room, hand on the hilt of her sword as she gently pushed away the drapes and entered..
Only to find a small empty room with nothing but a bedroll laid out on the ground.
What the...
" Azula"
" What the- Who's calling me?" Azula whirled around at the familiar voice calling out to her. It was soft but could still be heard, the light of the room she just left was oddly brighter now.
She pushed past the drapes and walked in to greet whoever called her, but she found herself in a completely different place than she was before.
She was no longer in a temple, she was now in some kind of...house?
" Azula, come quickly!" Two old woman who looked perfectly identical to each other spoke at the same time with urgency.
" L-Li and Lo? What are you both-" It took Azula about a second to figure out where she was." This is our house on Ember Island? But how-"
" No time, no time for questions!"
" Everyone is waiting, you must hurry!"
Azula was so caught off guard that she was pulled by both of her hands by her two caretakers who definitely shouldn't be here." Everyone? Who's everyone?"
" Everyone, your highness! Everyone who loves you!" Li and Lo spoke in unison as they pushed open the door together and Azula was blinded by the light.
" Why is it so bright?" She wondered out loud as she held up a hand to block some of it out, as she was pushed outside where a group of people were waiting for her.
But not just any group. It was her...former family and friends.
Father, mother, Zuko, Chan, grandfather, Mai, Ty Lee and even Uncle...they were all here.
" Azula! My favorite child!" Father called out with a smile as he leaned back in his chair under an umbrella with a way too relaxed smile on his face.
" Conqueror of Ba Sing Sae!" Uncle congratulated her in a sincere tone, that she couldn't believe.
" You killed the Avatar, singlehandedly ending the Hundred Year War!" Zuko reminded her of her victory over the Avatar in the catacombs under Ba Sing Sae. No scar present on his face that it almost unnerved Azula.
" I always thought you were kinda pretty." Mai said in the most monotone voice possible as she read a book.
" You were always the coolest at school!" Ty Lee shouted with much more energy.
" You were named Fire Lord after you father ascended to the Phoenix King." Mother said with a soft smile on her face that irked Azula.
" Your hair is amazing and you smell great!" Chan of course, came up with the most generic of compliments Azula had ever heard in her life.
Azula almost took a step back if Iroh hadn't gently put his hand on her shoulder and brought her closer. They were all here and loved her.
It couldn't be real.
" This...this isn't right. The Avatar is alive and this can't be-" Azula suddenly felt a sharp pain in her head, not unlike a headache.
Her thoughts were put on hold as she felt another hand touch her shoulder and she turned to see mother standing there.
" Azula." Mother said with a soft smile on her face." I'm so proud of you."
" You...are?" Azula said in disbelief.
" Yes daughter, so proud of you. I love you." Mother wrapped her arms around Azula and pulled her close.
Azula went still for a moment as she felt her mother's embrace. She can't even remember from her childhood if her mother had ever hugged her or done something so intimate.
This...this is what she wanted, didn't she? Her mother's love, her father's unconditional support, no more competition with her brother, support from her friends and acceptance by her uncle. It was everything she had ever wanted...
It took her about a minute to decide what she wanted.
No, this isn't what she wanted at all. Especially when it wasn't real.
" GET OFF OF ME!" Azula pushed mother away causing her to crash into Uncle's belly and fall to the sand with a rough landing.
" Azula, what are you-AH!" Father was cut off when Azula punched right him across the jaw, sending him to the ground in a single strike.
That was when Azula instantly that this was not her father. He could never be this nice or pathetic when it comes to a fight.
" Do you honestly believe me to be so easily fooled that you think throwing a few pathetic illusions singing praises is enough to fool me spirit!?" Azula shouted at the sky, knowing full well that this was a trick of the spirit of some kind.
" Stop this Azula! You don't-" Azula did not allow her brother to speak anymore as she instantly kicked him in the gut before delivering a similar punch to Iroh.
Azula's eyes darted around, looking for some kind of escape to get out of this illusionary world. She figured that her best bet was going back the way she came at their house.
But before she could make a mad dash back to the house, a voice called out to her.
" Please Azula! Don't do this! We can be a family again!" Mother shouted from the ground, on her knees practically begging.
That made Azula stop for the briefest of moments before her resolution became firm again.
She was no longer the same sad young girl desperately calling out for a mother to love her and a family life that wasn't dictated by rivalries and grudges. Maybe she did want all this...back when she was still a young child with eyes full of hope and innocence before it all came crashing down. The year she spent rotting in an asylum with nothing but the ghost of her past to keep her company during the few moments of lucidity that she could remember stripped her of any love she might have had once for her family.
Mother was few dozen years too late to be pulling the 'proud mother' act and she was not foolishly desperate enough to believe it.
" I already have a family and they are far better than any fake love you can give." Azula spit in her mother's face before giving a hard kick.
She didn't look back for even a moment as she ran back into the House where a bright light shined from the doorway.
" AH!" Kazumi let out a grunt as she got a kick in the gut by one of her ancestors, her chestplate taking the brunt of the assault but it still hurt nonetheless.
She quickly recovered but Kazumi had to move swiftly to avoid getting hit by another attack. The spirit navigator wasn't being attacked by all her ancestors, but rather a large number of them that all bore some resemblance to her own face, but she had no time to work out where on the family tree they lied as they all threw attacks at her.
" Our family were the defenders of the common people against the threat of dark spirits." Mother shouted as she shot thorns at Kazumi which she barely transversed away from in time. " Yet we have been reduced to little more than glorified mercenaries with fancy powers because of YOU!"
Kazumi ignored her fake mother's jabs as she focused on the fight in front of her. She couldn't even counterattack as she was too busy dodging attacks through transversal and quick movement to even think about striking back. The best she could do was block and parry attacks, and everytime she tried to go for a strike than she would be intercepted by another enemy.
" You have shamed our family line for too long, my granddaughter. Thrown away everything that we have built on the backs of our traditions, once a respected caste of warriors that were powered by the energies of the spirit world have been reduced to a mere fraction of what we could have become!" Her supposed grandmother berated her, Kazumi recognizing the woman from some paintings that her mother showed her.
I can't keep this up, I need to thin out their numbers or else I will-
" AAAHHH!" Kazumi cried out in pain as a few stray thorns hit her leg, the enlarged thorns causing her to fall to the ground as she was in the middle of moving. To her surprise, she not immediately cut down by her ancestors and mother.
Instead they all seemed to stop to let her recovery as the demon of shadows transversed in front of her, bending its neck down to taunt her.
" Poor Kazumi, her heart was strong and infallible once before. All it took was a dead baby to crack it apart."
Kazumi didn't back down for even a moment as she swung her sword at the demon as pitiful as it was in an attempt to kill it. But her attempt failed as her blade was knocked away by the creature's hand and the monster transversed away.
" How long I wonder until the poor girl under your care is killed as well because of you?" The shadow taunted her." Or better yet, leaves you when she realizes the truth about what kind of person you really are?"
Kazumi flinched at that as she stood up with gritted teeth as she pulled out the thorns imbedded in her leg, ignoring the pain as she stood up on her own two feet.
" Damn you all." Kazumi cursed the illusions in front of her with all her spite and anger. She knows its pointless to argue with these mockeries of her family, but she still feels the odd need to defend herself and her actions to some degree." You have no right to judge me for not following tradition of not keep, the Spirit Navigator line died with my daughter and I am resurrecting it with my new daughter like a phoenix from the ashes."
" Is that what you tell yourself so that you can sleep at night?" Mother asked her in a taunt." Tell me, does your precious 'new' daughter know what you really did to that poor girl whose corpse you dug up and desecrated so that you could have her all to yourself?"
Kazumi doesn't answer. The memories of what she did to that poor girl, Zhu Li coming back to her mind. A spike of guilt strike her heart and almost made her lower her blade at the memory. If Azula ever knew the how's and why she did what she did to Zhu Li...than would she ever forgive Kazumi?
She doesn't know and that scares her.
" Let us see the depths of your conviction." The shadow demon gave her a crooked smile." It will be fun watching you break."
Raise your hand if you thought Azula was the one who was going to be struggling to fend off the illusions of the spirit?
In all seriousness, I hope that I managed to surprise you all by having Kazumi be the one who struggles to fend off the illusions made by the spirit. Kazumi has always had trauma and its been explored so far, but unlike Azula it hasn't really been brough to the surface and properly dealt with. Which is the main reason for why Azula actually did a better job fending off the fake illusions of Ursa, partly because she's sick of her shit but also because she has a mother in Kazumi.
But don't worry: Things are going to get much worse next chapter.
:)
Now let's respond to some reviews shall we?
To Harry Potter:
Kazumi is definitely a pretty good mother to Azula. But as we are going to see in the next couple of chapters, she is not perfect by any means.
Though her basic compassion and love for Azula already puts her way above Ursa, which isn't saying much.
To Azuzu12:
No spoilers.
:P
To Kamen Rider Sentry:
I hope I managed to surprise you with Kazumi actually being the one struggling to fight off her inner demons while Azula is surprisingly doing well.
But don't worry, I got quite a few more things to throw at Azula in this arc.
To Lord 770:
Oh yeah, Kazumi definitely has a lot of repressed trauma that she has never really gotten the chance to deal with and it is all being put on full display here.
Well, you are correct that secrets are going to be revealed. A lot sooner than you think.
:)
With that said, I will see you all in the next one.
Angel Out.