A/N: 2024.07.25

This one was more of a drabble but I still enjoyed how it came out.

It Doesn't Hurt

They didn't even realize it. It never even occurred to them that it could happen.

That their pain could actually be quelled. Even silenced completely. At least, not in the way that it had clearly happened.

On the days that required them to perform no duties, Kratos and Freya would simply enjoy one another's company. They would go for walks; even strolls, though Freya made sure to never use that word. Lately, most of those strolls occurred without Mimir, something Mimir took considerable note of but decided not call attention to. For now.

Kratos and Freya were in Vanaheim one day, again without Mimir, spending the morning until the late evening talking and walking; Freya doing nearly all of the talking, of course. However, Kratos was not completely absent from the conversations, which still tended to surprise Freya at times. They fell asleep near Sköll and Hati's celestial shrine, situated close to the cliffside overlooking the valley. When the morning came, Kratos awoke first, discovering that, while he and Freya were asleep on separate cots, at some point during the night, their hands became intertwined.

The revelation hit Kratos immediately: he enjoyed the feeling.

He sighed as guilt completely took him over. He slowly removed his hand from Freya's, got up, and went for a walk.

Freya awoke a little while later. She looked at Kratos' cot and saw he was gone. She blinked, "Kratos?" She looked around, finding no immediate sign of him.

Freya felt confusion begin to overtake her. While there would be any number of reasons he was gone, she was curious why he didn't wake her up. Freya got up and began following tracks Kratos had left behind. "Kratos!" Freya called out. She walked a bit further until she finally found him, standing at the cliff's edge and staring at the valley. She calmly approached him, "Kratos?"

Kratos held his gaze on the valley.

Freya walked closer, "Is… is everything alright?"

"It doesn't hurt," Kratos whispered.

Freya blinked. "What?"

Kratos looked at her. "I've experienced much pain in my life, Freya. You know that. But… in recent days… for one of the very few times I can recall… it… doesn't hurt."

Freya froze.

"I… have searched… for any explanation I can. And there is only one reason…" Kratos stared at her. "…you."

Freya gasped. She felt a bewilderment at Kratos' admission. She was happy he wasn't hiding something like that from her, but she was amazed he could and even would admit to feelings such as those. But when she took stock of her own feelings lately, that's when it struck her.

Freya felt exactly the same.

Freya stared at the valley as well. Memories of the past few years entered her mind. From the entire saga with Baldur to fall of Asgard and Odin's death. Freya almost couldn't believe it, but even Baldur's death didn't hold the agony it once did. In fact, while she did miss her son and still love him, the truth of what Baldur became and how he became it was something she fully accepted. She stopped blaming Kratos. She hadn't blamed Kratos in a long time. Freya even found comfort in Kratos in ways she hadn't noticed until now.

Freya realized Kratos must have felt the same about her.

A tear rolled down Freya's cheek. "It…" She let out a shuddered breath. "You're right. It doesn't hurt. Not anymore."

Kratos closed his eyes and exhaled.

Freya covered her mouth, letting out a quick cry. She lowered her hand. "It… I… don't… feel that… pain."

Kratos gazed at the scenery again. "Forgive me, Freya."

Freya looked at him, perplexed. "Forgive you? For what?"

He turned to her. "I… have no right to feel comfort around you. I have no right to feel… peace. And I have no right to expect that I can or should do the same for you. I've taken some much from you."

"No, Kratos, I—"

"If you wish to have distance from me, I understand." Kratos turned his back and began to walk away.

"No!" Freya gasped as she immediately grabbed his arm, stopping him.

Kratos turned back to her, surprised to see tears streaming down.

"No. I… I don't want… to put any distance between us. Not when… I want us… to be closer."

Kratos straightened a bit.

"I know… we have… so much turmoil that has occurred between us. But… we've overcome it! I don't want to put anything else between us!" Freya paused a moment but couldn't stop more of the truth from coming out. "I-I want more. I want… what we could be… if we… let go of the pain… f-for good."

Kratos stared at her in amazement. He was positive the feelings he was experiencing for Freya were one-sided and inappropriate. Even more so, Kratos thought Freya would immediately turn him away for such feelings and thoughts. He was prepared for that.

He wasn't prepared for this.

"Freya," Kratos replied.

"We never expected this," Freya said. "I know. But… please! You're right. It doesn't hurt anymore. It truly doesn't. Please. Don't force me to lose that!" She stopped. "I'm sorry. That… that was selfish. But…" she stared into his eyes, "that's… how I feel." She took a breath. "Please, Kratos. We… trust each other. Maybe… the trust can grow into much more. If we just… take the chance." She took hold of his hands. "Please. You're right. I feel at peace now. Yes, there are moments when I miss the things I've lost. But… but-but those moments are few and far between… because of you. I… I want this."

Kratos remembered a time in his life where a conversation like this wasn't even worth having. There was a time when someone expressing feelings like this he would find meaningless and pointless. There were only two other times in his life he took a conversation like this seriously.

This was number three.

"I wish the same, Freya," Kratos whispered.

Freya let out a relieved gasp and quick laugh.

"Forgive me… for attempting to push you away. I never wanted that. I… simply wished to—"

"I know," Freya interrupted, still smiling. "Thank you… for considering me. But… I… am relieved the pain is subsiding. I didn't want to carry it anymore." He tentatively reached up and lightly touched his face. "I want more than just living past pain. I… want… a new life. New memories."

"I wish for that as well."

Freya smiled. She hugged Kratos, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Thank you. Kratos."

Kratos tentatively lifted his arms but put them around Freya's waist and pulled her closer.

Freya's smile widened. She rested her head on his shoulder, finally allowing herself to enjoy this feeling.

Kratos, at last, allowed himself to do the same.