Well kids, here's the latest installment, I hope you enjoy. Tfobmv18 pointed out that in the first chapter, I made it sound like Remy met Logan twice, and may I say that you are absolutely and totally right. I wrote chapter one like 3 years ago, and you're the first person that caught it. Well done you! If I could give you a cookie, I would. When I get done with this story that will be the very first thing I go back and edit. Selina and Red Skippy, I do indeed have an endgame in mind. I know it seems fragmented now, but I'm hoping that everything will seem to fit together smoothly by the end. But thank you for your honesty. Constructive criticism is awesome and helps me make this story just a little better, which is what I want most. Glad to see that iloveromys is back, and I'm thrilled that you're still enjoying the story. Thanks to each and every one of you for the awesome reviews, every bit of feedback is much appreciated and very helpful. I'm particularly happy that some of you find me occasionally funny. In my opinion, the humor is what makes the X-men awesome, and I'm glad that's translating. So everyone enjoy some more Romy magic, and belated Merry Christmas!

Part 18: As Hank Would Say, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times."

The plane landed, and the team started filterin' out. By then Logan was back to normal and off the gurney, but his eyes seemed full of Jubilee and ah knew we needed a little more time befoah "the talk". Besides, ah felt there was a more pressin' issue.

Ah fixed mah glarin' eyes on Remy. He smiled back confidently, but stayed put until the rest of the team were off and just the two of us were left.

"Gambit, ah would like to speak with you privately."

"Dis ain't private enough?"

"No. It ain't. Ah'd be most obliged if you'd follow me to mah room."

"How 'bout my room, chere?" He wiggled his eyebrows at me and ah resisted the urge to grab 'em by the ends and yank 'em off. Instead ah said nothing, and got off the X-jet. Ah knew he would follow me.

We got to mah room, and ah ushered him in befoah slammin' the door.

"Remy LeBeau what in the blue blazes are you tryin' ta do to me?!"

He shrugged. "A little o' dis, a little o' dat."

Ah leveled him with a heavy stare. "Ah would advise you not to get all uppity with me right now. Ah asked you a question."

"Did you jus' call me uppity, Miss Scarlett? I t'ink maybe dat's de pot callin' de kettle black. Yo' upset cause o' what I said on de plane. My question is, why exactly?"

Ah opened mah mouth in preparation foah a fire and brimstone tirade, but mah words betrayed me, coming out in stutters and fragments.

"Why don' you jus' take a deep breath ev'ry once in a while? You get all worked up wit'out even knowin' why." He was completely relaxed, a smirk playin' across his lips.

Finally mah voice found its way out. "You knew it would embarrass me; that's why ya did it. Not exactly movin' you up on the list of people ah can trust."

"The point, chere, is dat you have a temper, and yo' gon' have to reign it in a little. You bring me in here ready to give me hell and even you don' know why. Mos' girls would jus' say 't'anks Gambit! What did you get me?' you say 'I would like to speak wit' you in private so no one can hear you scream'."

"Maybe that's because unlike you ah don't like makin' a fool out of mahself."

"How is my gift shopping making a fool out of you?"

"Because you are Remy friggin' LeBeau. If you are out gift shoppin' foah a lady, everyone's gonna think somethin's goin' on that's not."

"An' what exactly is dat?" He raised an eyebrow at me. Ah tripped over words ah didn't want to say out loud.

"That…well…that you and ah are…like…a couple or somethin'."

"Unh-huh…and what did we jus' talk about last night?"

"NOTHIN' was said about a…um…girlfriend/boyfriend situation."

He laughed, and it made me embarrassed and angry, knowin' full well mah whole face was turnin' an unseemly shade of red.

"Oh forget it! Just get outta here!"

"Wait, Rogue, wait," he said between peals of laughter, "Desole, you caught me off guard!"

"You don't make any sense."

He took some deep breaths, and finally managed to get himself under control, exceptin' of course the huge pole cat grin.

"Girlfriend, boyfriend, chere. I haven't heard dose terms since middle school. You make it sound like I'm gonna carry yo' books and slip notes into yo' copy o' 'De cat in de hat'."

Ah flushed again, feelin' totally off keel and havin' trouble keepin' on topic. "Well what daggum terms do you use in the swamp?"

"If two people were romantically inclined, a simple possessive adjective would suffice. Say, if we were so inclined, I would call you 'mon femme', or my woman, and you could call me your man."

"That sounds a little prehistoric, don't you think? Introducin' somebody as a belongin'?"

"Well, you still introduce people by deir names. 'Hello Greg, dis is my Rogue.'"

"Maybe…but…this is still pointless! You an ah are not…well we're not…"

"Yes, but you agreed dat we would try to get to know each uddah, see if it goes dat way. Yo' short term memory ain't yo' best is it?"

"Ugh! Ah remember what the agreement was! The point is neither of us have made up our minds, and ah don't want a dang audience while ah'm mullin' it over. You love the attention. If things go bad yoah just livin' up to yoah reputation. Ah'll be the one who looks like a hopeless idiot foah hopin' that…"

"Hopin' dat what?"

"That things could be different foah me." It wasn't what ah was goin' to say originally, but ah thought it sounded better. How did we get so off track?

"I see. So its you dat's takin' all de risks, hahn?" His tone was accusatory, but his body language was still calm.

"That's not what ah said."

"Yes it is. You t'ink dat if t'ings go bad yo' de only one who stands to suffer from it. Or maybe I misheard you, maybe you meant to say dat if t'ings go bad it'll probably be my fault, me leavin' you right?"

"That's not exactly what ah meant, but face it Remy, where am ah gonna run to? Yoah the one with the options."

"Tell me you didn' try to take it back."

"What?"

"Today I was gone because I knew you would be tryin' to find me, to tell me dat you'd changed yo' mind. Tell me I was wrong."

Ah stuttered, caught off guard by his perceptiveness, and completely flustered. Ah brought him in here to give him an earful foah bein' a loudmouth, and now ah had no idea what was goin' on. So ah just stared at him, sputterin'.

"Dat's what I t'ought. Now listen to me. Last night we talked about trust, today you aren't trustin' me at all, and I want you to know dat I understand why its hard fo' you. Yo' used to people runnin' out, and so it's a natural self-defense fo' you to expect it. It doesn't help dat I have history, but I can't change dat. What I can do is tell you what I stand to lose, and hope you can see dat yo' not supposed to be waitin' fo' me to catch you, because we jump together."

He raised his hand and held out one finger. "Fo' starters, what do you t'ink will happen to my place here wit' de X-men if I break yo' heart? You t'ink Logan's gonna let me hang around? And where would I go? But hey, I been in dat situation befo', maybe it's not so bad." He held up a second finger. "How about my wonderin' if t'ings would be different if you didn't have yo' powers. Like you said, I'm de one wit' all de options. Do you look at me de way you do because I'm Remy, or because I'm de only one who tries? And what-,"

"You!" It just jumped out. Ah didn't mean foah it. He raised both eyebrows and smiled. Mah fingers started fidgeting in front of me and ah looked away. "Ah…ah just like you. Ah coulda liked Logan, or Bobby, or even Pietro or Morty, but ah didn't. Ah like you."

"Which brings me to my last risk," he took a few steps toward me, "you could very well walk away from me. You almost did it dis mornin'. You t'ink dat wouldn't bother me?"

Ah didn't know how to answer, so ah just sorta stood there like an idiot. How does he always do this to me?

"Tell you what chere, you wan' t'ings kept between us, I'll respect dat. Doesn' make any difference to me. Least not fo' de time bein'."

Ah sighed, relieved. Its not that ah was ashamed of Remy or anything, but with me bein' so mixed up inside and bein' so far out of mah element, ah didn't need every X-lady in the place glued to me like syrup on fly paper. But still, ah couldn't help but feel guilty. When did ah turn into one of those psychotic gals? Maybe it was when ah was absorbin' all those other personalities into mah own consciousness, but still ah'd hoped ah was better than that.

"Remy, ah'm sorry. You did deserve better after all you've put up with from me so far. And ah want you to know that-,"

He rushed over to me, takin' both mah hands. "No no, hush now. Relax. Yo' not in trouble wit' Remy. He knows dat it's his job to make you feel safe, and dat's gonna take some time. I planned dis whole t'ing. Well, de robots were a surprise…"

"But ah just wanted to tell you-,"

"X-MEN: TO THE CONFERENCE ROOM."

Never fails. Stupid computer man. Ah sighed again. Guess it'll have to wait. He smiled at me, the one-sided smile that makes a small crease in the side of his mouth and brings out his dimples. It's the one that makes it hardest foah me to breathe.

"See you back at de games, chere." He let mah hands go, bowed gallantly, and left the room. This man was gonna be the death of me.

Knowin' full well how long Scott can rant, and how late it was gonna be when ah got back to mah room, ah slipped out of mah uniform and into mah pajamas: long sleeved tee-shirt and pajama pants. Ah kept mah gloves on and threw on some socks and shoes befoah joinin' the rest of the team.

When ah walked in, they were usin' the flat screen television to watch news casts.

"…the U.S. government has officially denied any involvement…"

"…Friends of Humanity spokesman Dennis Sutton called the mutant abductions 'a valiant effort by watchful humanitarians to defend the world against the mutant scourge' and went on to say that the robots themselves were 'sentinel soldiers for the innocent and the defenseless.'…"

"…though reports are still coming in, nearly 400 persons have been reported missing worldwide, with Los Angeles and Paris being the hardest hit. Fortunately, reported casualties have been minimal. Property damage has been largely confined to roads, with an estimated repair cost of ₤3.4 million in London alone…"

The images as we flipped from CNN to ESPN to CBS to FOX drowned out everything else. It seemed strange that ah went so quickly from fightin' these things on the streets of New York to fightin' with Remy, but the whole affair was just too big foah me to get in one go. Ah wasn't ready to accept that this whole thing was real, and ah was tryin' hard not to hear Mystique in the back of mah head. Was this the inevitable war she was always on about? How could she have possibly thought there was a way to prepare foah what ah was seein' on the video feed?

Just then, we saw somethin' on the news that made Scott drop the remote and stay put.

"These unidentified mutants were seen in New York, dismantling the sentinels and rescuing those captured. Anti-mutant groups are calling them 'an unauthorized group of vigilante terrorists', but this woman and several others who witnessed their deeds are calling them 'heroes'."

We froze as we watched Colossus barrel into a sentinel on the television screen befoah a red beam made the camera pan to Cyclops. A familiar face then came up as the field reporter began an interview.

"I'm here with Leslie Moore, who says that these mutants rescued her. Leslie, what happened? Can you tell us who they are?"

Her wide eyes were reminiscent of a deer in headlights as the camera fell on her frightened face. "Well…I was walking back from my friend's apartment…she was sick and I had gone to visit…and this, this…MONSTER started chasing me, and it grabbed me. I was just hysterical, you know? I've never been so scared. But then there was this flash of light, and it dropped me. I don't know where they came from, but they saved me and a bunch of others and took us to the garage to try and keep us safe. The one that came first called himself Gambit, but I don't know anything else about him. I was just so grateful." Her voice broke a little, but she held herself in check.

The voices continued, but footage of the garage rolled over the sound. God bless, it was me, holdin' the buildin' up, and Gambit lettin' his deck loose into a sentinel's face.

"As you know, Ms. Moore, the garage was destroyed by these mutants. They have not come forward to identify themselves or take responsibility for their actions. Don't you think they were out of line by interfering without proper authority and destroying property?"

Logan growled as his hands bit into the chair. "Talk about leading the witness," Jean interjected, her tone hot.

Leslie's voice was no less amused as she answered, "Property shmoperty. People's lives were at stake and these guys came out to save us when no one else could, or would. And if these…X-men…are watching right now, I just want to say…well god, thank you!" Her tears finally spilled over, as her eyes met the camera, looking right at us.

"Ms. Moore why do you call them the X-men?"

"It's what they called themselves. The one guy came to the basement with us, he was talking over some kind of radio…he kept saying 'X-men do this' or 'X-men do that'."

Footage of Hank leaping from robot carcass to robot carcass while Ororo hurled lightning before him was followed by Bobby bolstering a wall of ice while Betsy cast psi-bolts at anything that broke through.

"WOW! I look AWESOME!"

"Shut up Bobby! This is the worst possible time!" Jean's eyes flashed as she berated him.

"You say that every time. Besides, it's better than sitting around getting depressed. You guys should know better than to watch the news."

"Robert, if you wish to pursue your role as a teenage ignoramus with no real understanding of the world around you, then please proceed to your quarters. If you want to be an X-man, then stay and learn what that means. This is our calling." Hank's voice was calm, and it made Bobby slink in his chair, sulking.

Finally the Professor wheeled into the room, and the television was turned off. His shoulders were still square, but his eyes were worn and his whole face seemed to sag. His smile had only half its usual charisma.

"My X-men," he began, "your efforts today were nothing less than extraordinary. As hard put as you have been, I wish I could say that we were at the end of our work rather than the beginning."

"We've been discovered, Professor."

"We always knew that discovery was both a risk and a probability of our public service. It was this reason that prompted us to develop code names and uniforms. There was no real way for us to address an emergency of this magnitude without being noticed. However, we will all have to take extra precaution to not be recognized outside this mansion for fear of jeopardizing the school and the children. We have far greater threats to address at this moment than the world becoming aware of our existence."

"Professor, having conducted a cursory investigation into the central processor I recovered today, I must say that the technology is formidable. I am currently without means of breaching the security systems without actually destroying vital information, which I am not willing to do. It will take me some time to gain enough understanding to access and interpret the data." Hank's voice was sheepish and sullen. It wasn't every day he was outwitted in electronics.

"Take what time you need, Henry, but make this your very first priority. People are missing and the processor is the only clue we have as to where they may have been taken."

"You think they may still be alive?"

"Killing someone is far less trouble than capturing them. I am convinced that these hostages were meant to be kept alive, but for how long and what purpose I cannot say."

"With all due respect, Xavier, even if we knew where they were, how do you expect us to rescue 400 people? We're good, but we're not that good. We're not an army." Psylocke's words finally voiced what we were all thinking.

"I cannot expect that of you. I will never ask you to do the impossible, but we will play as large a part as we possibly can. Jean and I will travel to Washington, D.C. tomorrow to address Congress, and then seek an audience with the United Nations."

"You really believe the government didn't have a hand in this, Chuck?" Logan's cynicism wasn't hard to detect.

"I don't believe the whole government was involved. Whether a small sect of it participated is, unfortunately, a possibility, but if they did they did so illegally. It is up to us to keep this issue in the forefront of the public mind. We were blindsided by this attack; with everyone paying attention hopefully the powers behind it will find it too risky to make another move. X-men, there are many people against us, but do not forget that we are not still without friends. We will solve this issue as we have solved all others, with teamwork."

Somethin' in his words sounded a little suspicious to me. "Professor, what exactly are ya sayin'?"

"That this problem must be resolved. And we must be willing to do everything in our power to see that it is. To this end, I have contacted Magneto."

There wasn't a body in the room that stayed seated. "Hear me, X-men. I know that he is our enemy, but he is a powerful man and an avid advocate for mutant rights."

Scott's voice thundered in first, "He's an advocate for mutant supremacy! If we're associated with him then how can we get people to listen to us when we say we want mutants and humans to live peaceably?"

"I would not have asked for Erik's help if it had not been absolutely necessary, Scott."

"It's NOT absolutely necessary. With the government, the army, the UN, surely we don't need to involve the Brotherhood!"

"Four hundred people Scott. An army of mechanical warriors, which no one has claimed, and no one knows anything about. We cannot afford to leave any stone unturned."

"Shouldn't we at least vote on it?" Bishop volunteered, equally unenthused.

"No. The few people in this room have no right to jeopardize the fate of those who are missing. The decision is made."

Half the team flopped back into their chairs, exasperated, but Scott stayed standing, clenching his fists, unwilling to yield. Finally he inclined his head toward me.

"Rogue, you were with the Brotherhood," Oh gawd, really? We're going to do this again? "therefore your opinion is valid. What do you think?"

Oh…oh. Ah had to admit, ah suspected that this was a loaded question, but ah figured under the circumstances answerin' honestly was the only way to go.

"Mind you, ah don't know much about Magneto personally…ah met him once but it's not like we had long conversations. He was in Europe with his team, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Pyro, and Mastermind foah most of mah time with the Brotherhood, and ah was under Mystique here in the states. But from what ah do know, ah think they'll be after the same goals as us whether we work together or not. Protectin' mutants is one of their main deals, and ah think we'll all move much faster if we just work together. But Professor, ah gotta say it: the difference between them and us is that when we find the people who did this they're gonna try to kill them all, not bring them to justice. Ah'd hate to see y'all tainted with that kinda reputation."

"I know. That is why I am restricting our cooperative efforts to cracking the code on the processor and creating a detection and alert system to prevent future attacks. They will not be granted access to the full code, which will contain the origin point for the sentinels."

"They won't stand foah that. They'll agree to it if they have to, but it'll be a lie."

"Yes I know. We're going to have to trust in our own ability to outsmart them in that case." The Professor fixed his gaze on Scott, who nodded to me curtly befoah taking his seat. Ah couldn't tell whether ah'd given the wrong answer or not. Ah knew the Brotherhood was wrong, but ah just didn't believe they were bad people like Scott did. At any rate, the issue appeared to be settled.

Logan cleared his throat and stood. "I know this is the part where we normally start talking about all the things we did wrong, but I'd like to say somethin' else first. Today was the first time I've ever worked closely with Jubilee here," he gestured to her across the table, and she looked up at him with wide eyes, "and I gotta say she really earned her stripes. I got us into a real situation, and she toughed it out and pulled through." He ran a hand through his hair, not used to sayin' so many words together in front of so many people. "Just wanted you to know ya did a good job today, kid."

Jubilee stared at him foah a second or two, and we all waited foah the trademark Jubilee gloat. Instead she jumped out of her chair and ran out of the room. Ah don't know quite what it was in her face that made me run after her, but sure enough ah found mahself sprintin' down the hall.

"Jubes? Hang on a second sugah!"

"Leave me alone!"

"Just tell me what's wrong!"

"I'm quitting the team. I gotta get out of here!"

Finally ah grabbed her by the shoulder, "What are ya talking about? Just cause Logan gave ya a compliment?!"

She shoved me off, but stayed put. "You guys don't get it. You think I'm so bubbly all the time because I'm young and stupid. You think I want to be on the team because I'm overconfident and after some kind of sick 'fun'. You don't know anything about me."

"Well tell me somethin' then."

"I have to try all the time. It doesn't just happen to me like it does for you guys."

"What doesn't happen?! Sugah yoah not makin' any sense."

"You guys get beat up and knocked down and then you get right back up and things go back to normal. It doesn't work like that with me, it changes me."

"You think we're normal?"

"Why am I even talking to you? You don't even know what happened."

"So tell me!"

"You wouldn't understand!"

Jubilee took off up the stairs, and ah followed a few steps behind. When she finally got to her room, she slammed the door in mah face. That finally got under mah skin a little, so ah went out a window and yanked hers open.

"Jubilation Lee you quit actin' like a dang brat and talk to me!"

"It's none of your stupid business!"

"If yoah plannin' on leavin' the team, leavin' the school, and leavin' mah study hall class, then it is mah business. Now you can either act like an adult and tell me what the problem is, or you can act like a dumb kid and ah can give you one heck of a time out at 10,000 feet till you cool off. Which is it gonna be?"

"But that's just it, there isn't a problem! Logan blew up and I was just fine. There wasn't a problem at all!"

"Honey, Logan blows up all the time."

"I'd never seen it before. It should have bothered me."

"It didn't?"

"No." Jubilee sank down on her bed, looking utterly deflated.

"Ok, what exactly do you mean Logan blew up? What happened?"

She sighed. "He was fighting one of those things, and I was covering him. Then he got sideswiped I guess or something, I couldn't really tell. He fell with his claws out and punctured a propane tank."

Ah couldn't help but wince, poor Logan. She pointed at me. "See that? That's the reaction people are supposed to have. And I'm just telling you the freaking story, you weren't there to see it. When I got over there his face was blown off. I could see the metal grafted to his bones…his eye sockets were empty…pieces of the tank were jutting out of his arms and legs." Her eyes welled up and overflowed in almost the same instance.

"Oh sugah ah'm so sorry!" Ah went to try to grab her hands, but she shoved me off again and jumped up.

"Don't you get it? I didn't even flinch! I threw some light out to give us cover, grabbed him, and dragged him away. Once we were out of sight I started yanking the shrapnel out of him. His whole body was convulsing and bleeding, and I didn't throw up, I didn't cry, I didn't scream. I'm 15 years old! I'm supposed to freak out! I held him down till he stopped shaking, and then once he had skin again I went and got him some clothes. We laid low until he was well enough to be moved and then we contacted you guys. I keep waiting, but there's nothing wrong with me. I might as well have gone for a walk in the park today. That's not normal!"

Her body shuddered with her sobbing as she her voice got louder and louder. Ah just stood there stunned, and not havin' any clue what to do.

"I try so hard to feel things, as often as I can, but it just keeps getting harder. My parents gave me up, I got shoved from foster home to orphanage to foster home. Then just when I find a family that wanted to adopt me, it turns out I'm a mutant, and everyone wants to kill me or hurt me or lock me up someplace. I wanted to be an X-man because I thought it might scare me, or inspire me, or make something happen inside! All my life I've been terrified that one day all the bad stuff would just snuff me out like a light, and I wouldn't be able to feel anything anymore, and then I wouldn't be ME anymore. And now I know it has already happened!"

Finally her voice gave out, and she started gasping in ragged breaths, the kind that only comes from really cryin' yoah eyes out. She sat back down on the bed, clutching the sheets with all her strength and tryin' to get ahold of herself.

"But Jubes…if ya don't feel anything…," ah reached out mah hand slowly, drawin' a single tear onto the tip of mah glove. "then why are ya cryin'?"

"I-I-I d-d-don't kn-kn-know!"

Ah sat down beside her on the bed, and fixed her with a level stare. "Let me tell you somethin' Miss Lee. What you felt today wasn't nothin': it was resolve. The chips were down, you saw what needed to be done, and you did it. Ah don't think ah've ever told you about a friend of mine. Her name is Merci. See, she was always such a persnickety kind of girl, didn't like to get her hands dirty or have her hair out of place. Then she got married and had a baby. She loves that baby more than anything in the whole world. And you know what the baby does?"

Jubilee looked at me like she thought ah was crazy, and had no idea why ah was tellin' her this. "He gets food in her hair, and throws up on her, and needs to have his diaper changed, and drools." Jubilee laughed a little because she couldn't help it, but it sounded like it probably hurt.

"Things that would have bothered her just don't anymore, because she loves him, and it's more important that he be ok than for her to be clean and comfy. Do you get what ah'm tryin' to tell ya?"

"Hon-honestly?"

"Ah didn't think so. Look, we're a team, and we're a school, but we also care about each other. Well, except maybe Bishop." She laughed a little again. "But we want you here because we like you, who you are. And the reason you didn't freak out when Logan exploded is because you care about him, and you knew he needed you. Yoah one tough cookie, sugah."

"Y-you really think th-that's it?"

"Ah'm convinced of it. And besides," ah pinched her shoulder and she smacked mah hand, "no one's gonna take the spunk out of you, girl."

"H-how can you be so sure?"

"Cause you didn't choose it. No one can make you one way or the other. If you want to feel things, then you will. Its only when you make the choice, like ah did, to put everything in a sealed box that you can stop feelin' things, and lemme tell ya, keepin' feelin's in is a lot harder than lettin' them out."

"Why would y-you do that?"

"Well Jubilee, it turns out that yoah a stronger person than ah was at yoah age. See, everything just got so bad that ah decided that nothin' was better than all the pain. But once ah started buryin' things, that box just kept getting bigger. Now it's so big that ah'm afraid to open it. If ah let mahself feel all that ah think ah'll just shrivel up and blow away. But there are some things that ah want to feel, and so ah've got to take the bad with the good."

"So what, we're exactly opposite?"

"Ironic, isn't it? So how about this: you stay here, and we can be accountability partners. You throw in the towel and it's probably gonna set mah recovery back about 10 years. Plus ah think Logan would feel just terrible."

"Logan won't care."

"Now I don't know about that," came a gruff voice from the other side of the door. Jubilee's face turned bright red.

"Come on in here, Logan, if yoah gonna pussyfoot around anyway."

Logan pushed the door open, and stood with his hands in his pockets. "I wasn't tryin' to spy. Just wanted to see if she was ok."

"Well come on in and have a look, sugah. Ah was just on mah way out." Jubilee looked up at me with wide eyes. "Don't worry Jubes, he doesn't bite. He's just obnoxious. And ah think you two might wanna have a talk, huh?"

Ah stood up to take mah leave, but Jubilee stood up too and surprised me by puttin' her arms around mah waist, pullin' me into a hug. True to form, ah froze like a statue and tried to back away. She let me go.

"Sorry…I just wanted to say thanks, Rogue."

"Uh…shoah sugah. Anytime."

Ah headed toward the door, but as ah passed Logan he caught mah shoulder and gave me a long look. Befoah he could open his mouth, ah held up a hand to stop him. "Later, Logan, one thing at a time." Ah tilted mah head towards Jubilee befoah ah finally got out of the room.

Ah briefly considered goin' back to the conference room, but then decided heck with debriefing, ah'm whooped. Mah shoulders and arms were startin' to ache from my earlier excursions, and mah eyes were startin' to feel heavy with want of sleep.

Ah trudged back up to mah room and opened the door only to find mah bed occupied.

"It amazes me dat you bother to look surprised every time, chere."

"What do ya want, Cajun?"

"Don' you remember? Nights are mine. We agreed on it."

"It's nearly one o'clock in the mornin'!"

"A deal's a deal."

Ah let mah breath out in a huff, but closed the door behind me. Slowly but surely, ah was learnin' to pick mah battles with Remy Lebeau. Ah walked in and kicked mah shoes off into the closet.

"You all right tonight, Rogue?"

Ah laughed sarcastically. "What kind of question is that?" But then ah thought about it foah a while. "You know, aside from the big mutant war that's happenin' and all the missin' people and the world outside this house, ah'm doin'…kinda good."

"Oh yeah? Why do you suppose dat is?"

"Well, we saved a lot of people today. And ah think that ah really might be an X-man now."

"You weren't already?"

"Ah was, but on probationary status. Ah've kind of felt like everyone's lookin' at me in a glass box since ah got here, and today was the first time ah didn't feel that at all from anyone, not even Scott. Ah feel like they're finally startin' to rely on me, and ah kind of like it. It was never like that with the Brotherhood."

"What was it like wit' dem?"

"Like every man foah himself. Ah mean ah thought of Mystique as a mother, but it was always a little weird. Ah didn't want to admit it, but ah always kinda knew she'd be ok without me. And ah knew that mah usefulness was the most important asset ah had. Or maybe ah didn't know it, maybe its just hindsight. It was always just a little colder than a family should be, ah guess."

"You get chatty when yo' in a good mood, you know dat chere?"

"What do you mean?"

"Normally I have to pull teeth to get you to come out o' yo' shell, and now yo' jus' leakin' all over de place."

"Hmm…maybe yoah right. Can ah get in mah bed now please?"

"Not jus' yet." Ah groaned. "I had somet'ing I wanted to try."

Mah body went positively rigid and mah breath caught. What was he talkin' about?

"Rogue, breathe. It's not anyt'ing big." Ah did as asked. "See I been t'inkin' about dis whole trust t'ing, and also about de touch t'ing." Ah stopped breathin' again. "Come on chere, relax. Put dose hackles away and listen fo' a second."

"What are you on about, Gambit?"

"Remy. My name is Remy. I hate it when you do dat."

"Do what?"

"Whenever yo' mad at me or wan' to push me away, you call me Gambit. It means yo' not listenin'."

Ah retorted with a very mature, "Nuh-unh."

"Den sit down an' say 'please go on, REMY'."

Ah sat down in the desk chair, crossed mah legs, and said, "Go on, swamp rat."

"Close enough. So long as s' not Gambit I got yo' attention. Though my proper name does sound so nice rollin' off dose lips o' yo's."

Ah couldn't stop mahself. Ah blushed. "Dangit, why do you like to do that to me all the time?"

"What?" He asked, puttin' on his most innocent face.

"You know just exactly what." Ah glared at him.

"Very well, petit, let's get back to business. Dis trust/touch issue. See one o' de ways people build trust is through touch, but you got a special case, oui?"

"You noticed?"

He ignored me, "De 'ting is, you can touch jus' as much as you wan', so long as it's not skin. You got in dis bad habit o' stayin' away from everybody jus' in case. So I t'ink maybe we should fix dat."

"Um, but…"

"I'm not goin' to try anyt'ing. Not tonight anyway," he flashed me another of those smiles that melts me, "but I was t'inkin' dat after today yo' back must be killin' you. So, if it's ok wit' you, Remy'd like to work on you a little. Totally innocent. Part of our trust therapy, which you agreed to."

"I don't know if that's-,"

"I'll be careful, I promise."

"But Rem-,"

"Come on, please? Every once in a while you got to jus' let me do t'ings, and not fight me de whole way. I t'ink dis should be one o' dose t'ings."

Ah took a deep breath, and closed mah eyes foah a moment, tryin' to come up with a valid reason ah could argue. Unfortunately there wasn't one. Ah opened mah eyes.

"You swear you'll be careful? If you touch me ah'll just-,"

"I swear. Now come over here."

Ah hesitated, but eventually pulled mahself out of the chair and put one foot in front of the other until ah had reached the bed. He grabbed one of mah wrists and pulled me gently down in front of him, sittin' with mah back to him. He was entirely too close, well within mah personal bubble, and ah found mahself nervous as all get out.

He gently gathered mah hair and placed it over mah shoulder. Then he ran the tips of his fingers slowly, gently down mah back a few times, raisin' goosebumps along mah skin under mah clothes.

His voice was distressingly close and low when he said, "Rogue, relax. It's ok. I'm not gon' hurt you, you aren't gon' hurt me, but you keep up wit' dis statue t'ing it'll ruin de whole point."

"Ah'm sorry…ah don't really know how to…ah'm a little nervous."

"Dat's ok, chere. I can help." His palms flattened against me and slid around mah waist. He pressed himself against mah back, resting his head on mah shoulder. He was so warm.

"That's not helping."

"Gimme a second, woman. Now close yo' eyes." Ah swallowed hard befoah lettin' mah eyelids sink.

"Now focus on jus' lettin' yo' face relax, like yo' asleep…Forget de rest o' yo' body, and let yo' eyelids feel heavy, yo' mouth be soft…Keep de worry out o' yoah eyebrows…Breathe. I'm here wit' you, and everyt'ing's fine. Take some deep breaths, and den turn yo' attention to yo' neck. Try to relax…let yo' head hang forward…"

He continued this way, workin' his way with his words down mah shoulders, back, arms and legs, until finally ah relaxed into the idea that we were here together, and he was touching me.

"You ok now?"

"Ah think so."

"Bon."

He leaned back, placing his hands on mah shoulders, kneading them with his thumbs. If ah coulda purred, ah could have. As it was ah moaned softly and let mah head fall down to mah chest.

Ah could hear the smile in his voice. "Was dat so hard?"

"Kinda. Ah've never had a backrub befoah. Where did you learn how to do that?"

"What, make you relax?"

"Yeah."

"Why, Tante Mattie o' course. Dat's how she used to get us back to sleep when we had nightmares. 'Cept she would put a chair near de bed and play with our hair, so we'd know she was dere till we fell asleep."

"She's a smart lady."

"One o' a kind. But remember, chere, it's still my turn to ask de questions." His fingers made small circles on either side of mah spine as he worked his way down mah back.

"What do you want to know now?"

"What do you miss most about yo' home?"

"Mississippi?"

"Mmmhmm."

"That's hard to answer."

"Work in tangibles, not feelings."

"Ok, then it would be one of three things depending on mah mood: Daddy, mah guitar, or Pied Piper."

"Go on."

"Well, ah miss daddy, but not like he was last time ah saw him. Honestly ah miss him most like he was befoah mama left. We were happiest together then. After that ah sort of reminded him of her so much…but anyway, enough about that. Mah guitar because it's kind of an extension of the best in mah parents. See, mah mama had to take piano lessons when she was a kid, and she hated them. She wanted to learn to play guitar and be a rock star or somethin', but her parents said it wasn't proper foah a young lady, and piano it was. But she went to all the clubs, and she met mah daddy there. He played in a band called "Flatbed", and he said that when she walked into the place you couldn't see anything else. At the time she was datin' a friend of his, so he couldn't do anything about it, but he overheard her whinin' about wantin' to play guitar, so he went and bought her one, had to delivered to her house as a 'secret admirer'. But secrets were hard to keep from mama, and as soon as she found out it was him they became inseparable. At least foah many years. She never did actually learn how to play it though. She was a bit on the whimsical side. Once ah got old enough, ah found the thing in the attic, and ah asked daddy if he would teach me to play. It kinda pleased him that ah took after him, and so our guitar lessons became our best times together."

"How come you don't just buy yo'self a new one?"

"Ah don't know. Ah haven't played since ah left home, and ah probably stink."

"It'll come back to you."

"Ah think it would be hard now, to think of him that way. It's easier to think of the bad stuff."

"You got to remember t'ings how dey were, not just de good or de bad. T'ings dat happen, happen so we can learn. You shouldn't let de bad stuff take away t'ings dat you care about."

"Yeah well, ah'm tryin' but ah gotta start with baby steps."

"What do you mean?"

"That's what ah was tryin' to tell you earlier," ah stifled a yawn, "you were right about me wantin' to take everything back."

"I know dat."

"But what you don't know is that ah talked mahself out of it." His fingers paused foah a moment and then continued.

"Oh?"

"Well, ah had a little help, but ah realized that ah've been convincin' mahself that things just happen, and that ah don't have choices. But it turns out things happen because of choices. And ah decided that ah want to try to make the right choices with you."

His hands stopped again. "Are you giving me positive reinforcement?"

"Don't let it go to yoah head, Cajun." Ah let out another yawn. "Yoah hands are really warm."

"I'm hot-blooded after all, petit." He let his fingers trace mah shoulder blades, and ah moaned softly again. "So what's Pied Piper?"

"Oh yeah. Pied Piper was mah horse. Pip foah short."

"You ride horses?"

"I rode that horse."

"Yo' full o' surprises, chere."

"He was mah best pal. And the handsomest boy you ever saw. Maybe even handsomer than you."

"You t'ink I'm handsome?"

"Do you really need me to tell you? Ah should think you'd know that well enough by now."

"Ah, but handsome is subjective, chere. I know dat I'm handsome to some people, but it'd be nice to know dat I'm handsome to you."

"Where do you keep that ego so it doesn't show?"

"Trade secret. Maybe I'll let you go looking fo' it sometime."

"One of these days, Remy,"

"You gonna answer my question?"

Ah shrugged his hands off mah back and turned around to face him. Ah nearly got nervous again when ah saw how close he still was, but ah managed to fight it off. Ah chewed on mah lip as tried to think of a way to get him to do what ah wanted.

Finally, ah reach up slowly with one hand, and stroked his hair. He stayed perfectly still. Ah reached up with mah other hand, runnin' mah fingers up either side of his jaw and then gently in his hair, massagin' his scalp.

At last! One side of his mouth turned up, making that crease in his cheek.

"There!" I pointed.

He raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"That smile."

"I have more dan one?"

"Yes. That one is mah favorite. It means that yoah tryin' to do somethin' to make me happy, or occasionally it means ah've done somethin' that makes you happy. It's yoah best kind of mischief. When you smile like that, yoah the handsomest man in the world."

Ah beamed at him, pleased with mahself. Ah was glad ah'd found a way to make him do it when ah wanted.

He smiled that smile again, and rubbed the back of his neck, lookin' away almost like he was embarrassed.

"You know…yo' very beautiful, Rogue. You been smilin' more often…it kind of catches me off guard."

Ah felt mah face set a new heat record, but this time ah felt mah mouth creepin' into a bashful grin so ah hid behind mah hands.

Ah felt his fingers curlin' around mine, and his voice was gentle. "Don't do dat. Come back here. I got a question fo' ya."

"How many questions are ya gonna ask me? It's quarter past two!"

"Just one more tonight den I'll let you rest."

"Ah remember that line: 'just one more thing'."

"But I mean it dis time."

"Well out with it."

"If I was gon'…say...ask you on a date…what would you say?"

"Ah would say 'maybe', and make you wait foah a few days so you don't get a big head."

"And after dat?"

"Ah just might say yes, so long as you promised to be a gentleman."

"But it's so much more fun when you let me not be a gentleman."

"Remy Lebeau yoah a lot of trouble."

"Yes I know. Goodnight, chere."

"Goodnight, sugah."

He stood and went to the door, but stopped with his hand on the knob.

"Friday night then?"

"Yeah, Friday sounds good." He smiled and opened the door.

"Remy?" He turned back around.

"Thanks foah savin' me today…and foah the backrub."

He grinned and walked back over. Ah held mah breath as he leaned down and planted a kiss on top of mah head. Then he winked. "Anytime, petit, anytime. And back at you."

He went back to the door, but stopped one last time. Ah laughed at him.

"One last t'ing."

"Ah thought so."

"How did you know?"

"Know what?"

"To play wit' my hair, to make me smile…"

"Tante Mattie's a smart lady."

He grinned one last time as he closed the door behind him. "One o' a kind."

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