Stanley Asked for Help: Mary Ramirez
Shack entrance, 3:30
Thursday
Stan was BEAT!
He knew much work would be involved in setting up a tourist trap, but this wasn't easy, even with the stuff Ford left. He had to make up all the stories, set up all the exhibits, lead the tours, handle the money and tickets, cleans the building, answer questions, get info from people about Ford and Fiddleford, and whatever other curveballs the world threw at him that day. That wasn't even considering him trying to get the portal to work and find the other two journals.
He was operating on 4 hours of sleep!
The only things keeping him going were the love for his exhibits, the money people were paying for them, and the hope that he would get the portal working one day.
As he pondered this while catching his breath on a stool between tours, he didn't notice the little girl walking up to him again.
"Hola Sr. Pines."
"Gah!"
Stan almost fell off the stool but was able to catch himself on the wall nearby before that happened. He then glanced at who had startled him, softening once he recognized the girl from before.
"Oh, it's you. The kid who won the lifetime pass."
It was at that moment that Stan realized he had never asked her or her mother what their names were.
"Did you ever tell me your name?"
The girl looked horrified for a second before it morphed into puzzled and then embarrassed.
"I guess not. I'm Mary. Mary Ramirez. My mami is Anna Ramirez, and my little brother is Diego."
Stan reached into his suit and pulled out a notecard and pen before writing on it.
"' Pass holders are Mary, Diego, and Mary Ramirez.' There we go." He then stuck it into his wallet. "This way, I'll never forget who the pass belongs to in case someone steals it.
"Now, what did you want to talk to me about?"
Mary then took a breath before she began her prepared speech. All the practicing in her room would pay off.
"Since you host such an amazing place, you should look the part. The suit is a nice start, but it doesn't make you stand out from the crowd. You must be as mysterious and amazing as the Mystery Shack."
She then put down her backpack and opened it to retrieve a notebook.
"I have a few ideas here you could try. Maybe use monster movie makeup to look more inhuman, carry a lightsaber to point at things and prevent people from touching the exhibits, or an eye patch because those are neat looking.
"And, of course, you can't be a performer without a stage name. I got a few down here, like 'Scientist Stan,' 'Professor Pines', or 'the Guile Gide.'
She flipped through her book to show him all her ideas as she spoke. Stan eventually took it from her and began looking with a critical eye in front of Marry's hopeful expression.
"I do like the idea of sprucing up my outfit."
Stan then remembered something he saw in the boxes of his brother's things.
"One sec- I'll be back soon."
Stan then raced back towards the house part of the building to the confusion of Mary.
After a minute, he returned with a Fez on his head and a large femur in his hand.
Stan smiled at her. "I also like the eye patch idea, but I'll need to get one later unless you happen to have one just lying in your-"
He froze when Mary proceeded to hand an eye patch over to him.
"I had one in my costume supplies and brought it over just in case."
Mary then began to panic a little. "Is this too weird?"
Stan looked at her, then the eye patch, and then picked it up and put it on.
"It's just the right level of weird for the host of the Shack. I'll take my time with the name, though. It'll be on as much stuff as 'Mystery Shack.' How do I look?"
Mary stared in awe at him.
["Like a man of mystery."]
RING
The alarm clock went off again, signing the start of the next tour.
"I'm Sorry, Mary. It's time for me to take the next tour. See you next time."
"Adios Sr. Pinos!"
With that, she skipped over to the school mom she carpooled over with and jumped into the back.
Friday, the Shack, 3:30
Stan nervously looked at Miss. Ramirez as she stood in the crowd waiting to go into the Shack. As someone who had dealt with the cartels a fair amount, Axolotl meant more to him than a funny-looking lizard. It was a name whispered between hardened criminals in fear, a shadow that would end anyone that displeased the heads of the azúcar en polvo cartel with deadly precision. Their top enforcer, who it was said died 11 years ago in an explosion that also removed the heads of all the cartel's greatest rivals all at once.
Stan then looked down at the little girl at her side and couldn't begin to blame her for any of it. She was doing what he was, trying to do better for their family.
"Hello, everyone; as I have been telling everyone that comes here today, the Shack is now selling snacks."
As the crowd began to murmur in excitement, Anna raised an eyebrow at him. He just shrugged back.
"I currently have a selection of prepackaged animal crackers, toffee peanuts, chips, candies, and more for sale with your ticket. More options will become available as I continue to set things up. And for our lifetime pass holder." He nodded at Mary. "You also get to choose one item of $1 or less a day for free."
Mary was jumping up and down so much that she was a blur. On the other hand, her mami looked at him with an expression somewhere between scowling at him for giving her daughter unhealthy snacks and being impressed with him finding a way to profit from her condition.
"The lifetime pass now also allows you to give one person with you half-off admission and a complimentary snack.
"Now, without further ado, let's go into the Mystery Shack!"
After the tour
As Mary and Anna moved to the exit, Stan waved at them.
"Hay, can I talk to you for a minute?"
Mary raced to him while Anna walked over with her hand on her purse. Stan gulped as he looked at her before schooling a smile and turning to Mary.
"Your mom came over this morning at lunch and handed over the translation of the scroll. I'll start making the Spanish one for you and let you know when the translated one is ready. Ok?"
Mary nodded so rapidly that she looked like a bobblehead. She was so busy thinking about how she would mount the scroll in her room she didn't notice her mami talking to Stan.
"Junk food?"
"Hay, if you know where I can get 'healthy' snacks in bulk in this town, let me know. Otherwise, I don't have the time or equipment to make and store 100 bags of carrot sticks or apple slices. Besides, aren't animal crackers healthy?"
Anna didn't have an excellent reply to that before Mary spoke up.
"Oh, I have a few more ideas for your tour guide persona. Here you go."
She handed over her notebook to Stan, who then flipped through it at the costumes.
"Though I'm not sure about that lantern you have constantly carried all day. It doesn't go with your current outfit. Maybe hold onto that for midnight tours while you keep the lights low."
Stan paused mid-flip before handing it back to her.
"The lantern has sentimental value; I'm not giving it up. I do like the idea of late-hour tours, though. As for the costumes, They are nice looking but not practical for me to make or wear for long periods."
Mary deflated a little as Stan handed it back to her.
"Hay, they can still be good for a day like Halloween."
"Or Summerweein!"
Stan blinked before turning towards Anna.
"Summerweein?"
She shrugged. "Halloween is so popular here they decided to celebrate it twice a year. June 30th."
Stan then began to smile.
"That means there are two days a year where it is socially acceptable to traumatize kids! This is great!"
RING
Stan turned off the alarm before turning back to the two.
"It's time for me to do the next tour. Adios Mary, Adios Anna."
"Adios Sr. Pines!"
Stan went to the tourists, and the Ramirazes went to their car.
Anna wasn't that concerned about Stan being happy about traumatizing kids. Dia de los Muertos will always hold a place in her heart for honoring the deceased, but Halloween was for scarring the living.
Main Street. 4:30 PM.
Stan walked out of the hardware store with bags of paint, wooden boards, and some brushes. His lantern was clipped to his belt and still lit.
"Hola Sr. Pines."
Stan turned around and saw Mary Ramirez walk up to him.
"Hola nina. Where's your mom?"
She then pointed behind her to the woman having a heated discussion with a shopkeeper over the differences between bananas and plantains.
Stan rolled his eyes. "I don't see why she should bother. In this town, it's a miracle that people can tell apples and oranges apart."
Marry giggled at that.
"What are you doing with those?"
Stan shrugged. "Making some signs to put up along the roads into town to let people know about the Mystery Shack. The first step in getting people to visit is letting them know you exist."
"Makes sense to me, and I can help make them if you want. Speaking of the Mystery Shack, When do you think the tour will be able to go through more than just one room? I love what you have done there, but it's getting repetitive."
He gave her a small smile. He might not like kids, but when one shows up to hear you tell stories daily, you can't help but grow fond of them.
"They're going great! I am almost done clearing out some more space, so it won't just be a tour of one room anymore. With me spreading the items out further, the tour will take longer. I'm thinking of making the tours 30 minutes long now."
Mary adopted her adorable, super-serious thinking pose before looking like she had an idea.
"How about you set it up to alternate which half of the tour you do each time? Then you can charge $20 for a 15-minute tour and $30 for a 30-minute tour?"
Stan just looked at her for a few seconds before his face began to lite up. You could hear the cash register sounds around him.
"That's brilliant! And for that idea, your pass now lets you take the 30-minute or two 15-minute tours daily."
If Stan's face lit up like a lightbulb, Mary's face was a lighthouse. In a second, she had charged forward to wrap his leg in a massive hug. This action caused Stan to freeze as a multitude of emotions cascaded through him.
Joy at being hugged with no ulterior motives, protective of the little kid who cared about him, confusion on why the kid would care about him so much, fear of what the mom would do to him if she saw it, and panic as he saw the mom standing before the two of them with a dangerous sparkle in her eyes.
"Hola Sr. Pines. How are you doing today?"
"Well, your daughter just gave me an idea that will increase business. I expanded the limits of her pass, and I'm being hugged so tight I'm losing circulation in my leg."
Mrs. Ramirez gently touched her daughter's shoulder and pulled her back.
["Mary, what did Stan do with the pass?"]
As Mary excitedly described what had just occurred between the two of them, Stan braced himself against the nearby poll as he began to shake his leg and catch his breath. He wasn't kidding about losing circulation, though part of him would love to feel that again.
He also quickly checked the lantern to confirm it was still lit and on his belt.
"Mr. Pines?"
Stan faced Mrs. Ramirez, who was staring at him with an expression that betrayed her past as a ruthless killer.
"Thank you for letting my daughter spend more time at your shack, but we must discuss these logistics more. I don't think my schedule will permit me to escort her there for long periods."
Mary then turned to her mami in confusion. "Why can't I just go to Stan's house alone? There are other towns folk there for part of it, and is it that bad if I spend time with him unsupervised?"
Stan shrugged his shoulders. "I don't think it's a problem, but she does. You can't come to the tour if we don't follow her rules." He then turned to Miss. Ramirez. "I was thinking about hiring someone to man the register and sell snacks while I focus on giving the tours. Would that do as a chaperone?"
Anna thought about it for a second before nodding.
"Ok, I'll allow that."
She then immediately held up a hand to stop Mary's celebration.
"However, I want it to be someone I recommend or help interview. If they will supervise the two of you, I want them to be someone I can trust."
"Deal."
The two shook on it as Mary beamed at them.
"I've got to start making the signs and posting some help-wanted ads. Why don't you start gathering up the people you think would be a good fit and bring me their contact info?"
She nodded. "Sounds good. Have a nice day, Stanley."
"Adios Sr. Pinos!"
As they walked away from him, Stanley was surprised that a part of him was missing the girl.
"Get it together, Stanley. You have journals to find, a brother to save, and a business to run that funds the first two. You can't get attached to a random kid."
As he returned to the shack, his heart ignored that command.
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To celebrate the upcoming "Book of Bill," I have decided to make this a Gravity Falls summer! This means I plan to post a chapter of this fanfic once a week, every Friday morning until
August 30th. I have almost 20 pre-written chapters, so I don't know when this will stop.
I have a if you want to support me and my New Year's resolution of posting one fanfic of 2k words or more weekly. This is also being posted on , AO3, and Tumbler.
Remove all the spaces from the URLs to get them to work.
: : / / w w w . user?u=10132890
. c o m : : / / w w w . s/14051718/1/luz–appreciation–week–2022–from–1228248
AO3: : / / works/52823413/chapters/133608991
Tumbler: : / / w w w . blog/brianedner
I am also doing fanfic info dumps, like wiki articles that go one episode at a time, with some compilations at the end on specific topics sorted by episode.
Fanfic info dumps here: : / / w w w . 1228248/gallery