DISCLAIMER I DO NOT OWN AIKATSU
Shouta's POV
"After the Royalty Cup... I'm leaving Starlight and quitting being an idol." I froze still at what Momo said.
I have been thinking recently that she was acting a bit strange but thought it was the stress of the Royalty Cup. Never, not once, did I ever think that Momo would leave Aikatsu like this. So soon into our careers too. Since I started it has always been the two of us against everything. But if she leaves, then what is left of me?
More than anything, what happens to her? The Momo that gave it everything both on and off the stage would return to her normal school life? She wasn't the girl that I met almost a year ago. This Momo didn't belong in the category of a normal person. To quit just like this was almost insulting to everything that she worked so hard to improve.
"I know that this may come as a surprise but I want you to know that it wasn't a decision made on whim. I've thought about this for maybe a month now. The final breaking point was watching you all today. How brightly you all shine. I know that I can never reach that level you all aim to be. Nor is my desire as strong as the rest of you."
I opened my mouth to question more when Karasuma turned to leave. Looking between the two, all Momo did was shake her head at him leaving. I couldn't let it end like this. Momo told us this because she trusted the two of us the most. That she loved us the most to know how much this announcement will affect us.
My feet took off to get him back. "Karasuma-kun. Karasuma-kun!"
"What?!" I took a slight step back so that I wouldn't fully be in his personal space.
"I know you're surprised but we should hear her out. Momo-san wouldn't-"
"No she would." He was hurt. I know that but so is she. I have to believe that this news, seeing him react like this, isn't as easy as she is making it seem like. If we could all talk it out then we can reach a conclusion on why she thinks that her quitting is the answer.
"Then we can help her. Whatever it is, we can bring her back. She loves Aikatsu more than anyone."
"You don't think Shiro knows that? Her brain runs through multiple scenarios at once, considering almost every possible outcome. She chose not to come to us prior because her logic sees that it was not necessary. She made up her mind." I couldn't look him in the eye. That's the difference between Karasuma and I. I couldn't speak my mind with the same level of authority as he always had in his voice.
"I know that but it doesn't mean you can walk away like this. If what you say is true, then Momo-san also knew that you would react like this. Still she worked up the courage to tell you herself now. And you're just going to walk away without hearing her out?"
"Yes I am. I do not owe her my attention because she wants it." His attention was never on me. It was always on Momo standing behind me. The pain in his eyes was because of her. "I'm going home. Do whatever you want, Shiro. Like you always do."
"Karasuma-kun! Karasuma-kun!" I didn't chase after him. And neither did Momo behind me.
She slowly walked up to pat me on the shoulder. With a smile on her face, as if nothing happened, she turned to me. "Shall we head home for the night? The others should be done cleaning up at this point."
My words got caught in my throat. I wanted to ask more and say some inspirational words to tell her how she could grow more in her Aikatsu than she thinks of herself. But what Karasuma said stuck with me. As well as I know her and what can convince her to continue, she knows me enough to know what I will say. Nothing I can say will change her mind.
"You're right. Let's head back." This was going to be one of the last few times that I was going to be with her. I had to cherish it while I still can. And to be completely honest, I was afraid to hear her reasoning.
I've come to love watching Momo work. Talking to multiple people at once, assigning roles, solving issues with no thinking time, she made everything seem so easy. Whenever I had an issue in the behind the scenes work, she would be there. Even if it was through a phone call. There was always this feeling of calmness knowing she was behind me every step of the way. It was because of her that I was allowed to move freely all the time. That's going to be gone soon.
"-and Shouta-kun," she suddenly turned to me. I stiffen up to make it look like I've been listening the entire time.
"Y-yes?" She looked at me with pity. Probably knowing what I'm thinking about.
"Shouta-kun can you get the flowers? I already called the store ahead of time. You can just tell them my name when you arrive." Ah right. We were planning Shibuki's welcome home party right now. Momo, of course, being the main coordinator of everything.
This party was going to be a grand celebration that had not only past idols attending, but agents, designers, directors, choreographers, and more. Everyone wanted to welcome her back in a manner that was fitting for her. Already some of the guests had arrived and we haven't even finished decorating yet! And while I was a fan of Shibuki's work myself, I was more concerned about the one planning it all.
"R-right! I'll- I'll leave Starlight now- I mean I'll get the- the um the flowers now- so I have to leave the building- not leave Starlight Starlight but yeah. Yeah I'll do that now!"
I rushed myself out of the desk, hitting my knee in the process. To everyone else this was normal for me. I was the shy, always nervous boy that ran from everything. Even a simple task was too much for me. They all looked at me in concern. Why wouldn't they?
Before I knew it I was out the doors. The whole meeting was a complete blur that I didn't even get an address for the flowers. Looking down I was starting to feel the sting on my knee. I should have gone back to ask for the directions. Instead I just stared at my knee. If Momo had more time she would have scolded me for acting so dramatically to have injured myself. But she was busy. She was so so busy.
My phone vibrating in my pocket was what brought me back to my task. An address and bus route needed. I chuckled. Of course she knew me so well to send this over. A straightforward text message with no other information or fluff. I sent back a quick message in response. The 'read' symbol being shown right after.
I know that I can't change Momo's mind about her retirement. I just had to make the last days as an idol the best that I could. Starting with getting some flowers.
The bus ride kept my mind occupied. All the sounds blending together so effortlessly. With Starlight students usually having car accommodations to get to and from venues, its been a while since I took public transit. I liked hearing the ring of the stop buttons, the small voice announcing the next stop, people coming and going. It was busy but not in a rush type of way.
Stepping off the bus, it dropped me off by the beachside. For a second I wondered if I had misread the routing. It was beautiful here but to come all this way for some flowers seemed a bit much. Though the shop was easy enough to spot from where I stood. If the building around the corner covered in colours wasn't enough to see it, the fresh smell of flowers was very much mixed into the salty air.
A tiny bell rang above my head upon opening the door. The florist didn't turn around as they seemed to be carrying a large bouquet in their arms. "Welcome! I'll be with you in a second!"
"Oh no worries. Take your time! I'll just look around for a bit." The shop was absolutely beautiful. Almost like I had stepped into a fantasy world with only flowers. Somewhat small but I think that's mainly because of how much it was filled with. Each flower here was raised carefully to its specific needs. I can see why Momo trusts this flower shop to make me go the distance.
"Sorry about that." The worker came back but another voice called to their attention once more. "Yeah, there's still some more upstairs! By the desk, you can't miss it! Sorry again."
The two of us made eye contact. I knew her. I didn't know how but something was familiar about her. I don't think she was a fan or someone I worked with before. Where we were was not close to Starlight or my neighbour that I doubt we ran into each other often.
Her light brown hair with pink natural highlights tied back with a low ponytail. From the moment I walked in, I could tell she was a very energetic person. She was clearly an adult but I couldn't tell an age from how well she took care of herself. Her voice sounds familiar. Very good at enunciating with little strain on her throat, surprisingly deeper than I imagined.
"Wait a second, are you Higawari Shouta? Did Momo send you here to help us with the delivery? How nice of her!" So she knows Momo given how casual she spoke. And she knows about me.
"Delivery? Um M-Momo-san sent me to pick up? At least that's what she told me. I think. Did I get it wrong?"
"Hmmm, either way we have another pair of hands to help out! Works for me since we have a lot to deliver. Come on; follow me." She didn't even bat an eye to my confusion. Looking on the positive side of things made me instantly comfortable in her presence. Again, she was oddly familiar.
I followed her lead to one of the backrooms when another worker popped out. The two nearly collided but stopped right in time. Sharing a laugh in response without another word. I tilted my head to get a better look at the other worker. My eyes widening as I saw who it was.
If I thought I was star struck yesterday, no no no I was completely hit today. I don't even think I was this way with the rest of Soleil. In front of me was the one and only, former top idol, the queen herself, Kanzaki Mizuki. No words formed in my mind besides Kanzaki Mizuki. The Kanzaki Mizuki! As a florist! In front of me! Kanzaki Mizuki.
I snapped my head to the other florist. Now I can recognize her! The other half of WM and Vivid Kiss' former muse, Natsuki Mikuru! She didn't do much solo work that I didn't get to study much about her. However, everything that I did know showed that she was top quality right from the start. As expected as Kanzaki Mizuki's self chosen partner.
Kanzaki giggled once more. Stepping to the side, she walked over to me. Quite literally taking my breath away. "Higawari Shouta? Momo called me a little while ago. You're going to be helping us take all these flowers back to Starlight. Is that okay with you?"
Her voice was beautiful. Still as deep and clear as when she was an idol. Maybe it was my rose tinted glasses over my ears but I was imagining a melody behind her words. Even retired she exemplified how an idol presents themselves. Both of them did.
I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. What should I even say to these two? I had to make my first impression perfect. Not only that but I had to tell them how much they mean to me and my generation of idols. The legacy and role models that they were. How they shaped Aikatsu history with their existence.
Natsuki beamed, linking her arm with her partner's. "He's as cute as he is on tv! You know how some people play the act for the image? I should have trusted the idol that Momo-chan scouted."
"You- you know about me? Like you're not not confusing me for someone else? Like me me?"
"Of course! Ever since we heard about Momo-chan's debut, we've been keeping a close eye on you two. Even Mizuki sometimes re-watches your variety shows when she has the time."
She nodded to the claims that made me even more light headed. "Watching you on variety is endearing. Though you hardly realize that it is because of that naivety that you bring out the best of the others with you. This is still while holding your own ground in standing out. It's both amusing and relaxing to watch. Making it very easy to support you."
"I'm dreaming. I'm actually dreaming."
Natsuki clapped her hands to bring me back to reality. "Now now, we can sing your praises later. But right now we have some flowers to deliver. If you don't mind helping us out, that is?"
"No of course! No, I mean I want to. Not no like I won't but that I will help. I will help."
"Thank you. We just have one more bouquet that's upstairs. We'll go grab it. Can you head out to the car to make some room for it?"
"Yes ma'am!" I scurried my way over in the direction that they came from. Careful not to knock over any of the vases or decoration pieces that took up every nook and cranny of the place.
As I started to shift the many arrangements I took notice of how easy it was to label each person to a bouquet. The pink and yellow carnations were for Hoshimiya. Next to it, on the right, were a collection of bluebells and white snowdrops for Headmistress Kiriya. To the left were purple lilies with some plastic orange butterflies for the accent to match Shibuki's aura. These just being a few examples that caught my eye.
Even though this party was mainly focused on Shibuki's return to Japan, Momo had given a lot of thought to include those that merely attended. Probably because it was so hard to have all those legendary idols all gathered in one area.
This was what I was going to miss when Momo retires. She may not look it but she was always observing people. Trying to find the best answer for what would make them the happiest. To her, there wasn't anyone that wasn't their own main character in their story. It's because of her views on people that could make even people like me shine.
"Ready to go?" I jumped when Natsuki reappeared right beside my face. Dropping my phone in the process. Kanazaki picked it up. Her face softened from the caller id that I was, unknowingly, staring at.
"Momo did say that she left out the fact that we were the flower shop owners when she called me. Were you trying to call her to clarify?" She handed my phone into my shaky hands.
"N-no not really- I was just- I thought there was a miscommunication on my part. I wasn't all that present when we were having the meeting. If I had known that you two would be here I would have prepared myself mentally. I was trying to call her because... I don't really know why." Because I miss her. Because I know that these are the last few times I will be able to help her in things like this.
"Well we're already going so let's head out. Then we can see her faster and say we all did a job well done." Natsuki placed a hand on my shoulder. Almost like she was trying to relax my constant downing energy that they clearly can't ignore. Not that I was the best at hiding it.
The two adults sat in the front seats as I sat in the back. The smallest pot, meant as a gift for Momo, on my lap. The plant inside hadn't sprouted from the soil yet. Besides the tag addressed to her, I had no other information on it. I pictured something suiting her would be simple like a cactus or useful like aloe. Somehow it would be different than the flowers that were behind me.
"So Shouta, are you all ready for the Starlight Royalty cup?" Natsuki asked from the driver seat. "We saw the rock climbing broadcast you and your friends did yesterday. As expected Momo-chan's expertise really shows in large events like those."
"Yes! Thank you so very much. Momo-san always manages to surprise us. I never thought that I would scale a mountain side for a live broadcast. Or in general be able to do so. Though I am a bit sore from yesterday. I'm just glad that no one fell or get injured. And that people really enjoyed watching it."
"I have to admit, for a first year idol it is quite a task you all completed. It's respectable that you and your friends are still helping with Shibuki's welcome home party after yesterday as well. I imagined that all of you would have collapsed from exhaustion."
"I'm surprised as well. But Momo-san puts a lot of emphasize in boosting our stamina whenever we train together that I'm pretty okay today. I think I got one of the easier tasks for the party anyways. I probably was just in the way that she wanted to get rid of me for the day." I caught myself by covering my mouth before I could say more. There goes my chance at a good impression. After they did everything to make a welcoming environment for me and I ruined it with my negative mindset. This was the difference between me and legendary idols.
I froze when Kanzaki started laughing. From what I remember, Kanzaki was always the more serious one of the two. Does that mean I'm such a mess that I can crack her image? "Sorry, I heard that you two were opposites but to this extent is quite amusing to see in person. An idol like you really brings a breath of fresh air. It's no wonder why she ended up being an idol."
"Then would it be my fault if she ends up hating it?"
"If anything, you are one of the reasons she was able to continue for so long. She's a strong girl. The barrier that her parents created was something she never could overcome. It wasn't only the name association. Everything we heard about how she was raised should have pushed her away from the industry. Not until she met you."
I wasn't convinced. "You're right that she's strong. I'm sure at some point she would have overcome being called only the Star couple's daughter. Her music sense is due to her own work and has a completely different style than her parents. Not to mention her personality. She has her own name now because of her own work. Not mine."
"Did you know that in the week that Momo was born, reporters would impersonate doctors and nurses to get a picture of her? It isn't hard to do a simple internet search for her kid photos."
"E-eh?" I gripped the pot tightly.
Kanzaki leaned back into her seat with a sigh. "I did say it wasn't solely being compared to her parents that pushed away from Aikatsu. As far back as I remember, Momo had been in front of a camera. She couldn't even attend preschool because other parents felt uncomfortable with how in the spotlight she was. Besides Yuki, no one ever could stand beside her. Reason after reason, she was forced into a spotlight that she never could call her own. Still, I don't ever recall her hating cameras. Her pursuing becoming an idol attests to that. That's also because of your influence."
That sounded... lonely. I mean I knew that people liked associating her with her parents but I never heard this side. She had no hatred towards her way of being raised. How could she go about knowing that so many people only loved her because of her parents? Love her to an extreme that deluded them to breaking her privacy. How come she didn't come to hate Aikatsu or idols?
"I didn't do anything."
"You're her idol. You may not know your effect but it's there. As someone that's known her since her birth, you have no idea how much she changed with you by her side. For the better. Because as long as a person like you shows the light in the industry we gave our lives to, then there will always be hope that the light remains shining."
I remembered how Momo was when we first met. When she first told me that she was the Star couple's daughter, all the light that she had from performing my song vanished. She told me multiple times that despite the hardships she went through as a kid, she never hated her parents, music, or Aikatsu. It just became hard to continue. The goal too far out of her reach that she couldn't help shutting it down.
"Along with keeping tabs on you and her, I watched your friends so closely. A child model that had so many expectations, a split personality with the same goal, a girl so burdened with pressure she nearly fell. Even those not in Starlight. One filled with equal parts of hate and love for their craft, a designer that needed to fully step back for her own sake, and a child that longed for a goal taken from birth. All of you, including Momo, have a reason for hating Aikatsu. Yet none of you do."
"We couldn't!" The two smiled at my outburst. My face went hot as I held back looking at them.
I know that compared to my friends sometimes my worries seem less. I was just a shy kid that sometimes had difficulty speaking up. I know that a lot of them had struggles. Yet I admired every single one of them and so many more of them for overcoming everything. They faced each obstacle to produce a stronger and more wonderful human being. Idol or not, they loved what they did because it gave them a chance to grow. People looked to them because they weren't perfect yet shined brightly with everything they could give. They loved where they were. I saw that in every single performance they did.
"You know Shouta even though Mizuki and I retired, it doesn't mean we came to hate Aikatsu. None of our friends think that way. I promise you that."
"Then why leave?"
The two looked at each other. "Sometimes we don't even know that answer. Just one day it will come to you. A sense of accomplishment that you've done all that you can. That you're more needed elsewhere. For us, being at the top solely because people had that image for us to forever be at the top, wasn't what we needed."
"But- but what about your fans? Don't- didn't you feel sad that you couldn't perform with Soleil or as Tristar or Star-anis or do things like go on variety shows? A good collection of your life and friend group was mixed into Aikatsu. It was your lives for so long. Weren't you afraid of giving it for something so unknown?"
"Of course we were but Higawari-kun," Kanzaki reached back to loosen my grip on the pot, "sometimes holding onto things too tightly hurts more."
I met Natsuki's eyes in the rear-view mirror. "It is scary. But taking that first audition to Starlight must have been too. Same with your debut. The first time you see yourself on tv. Taking a test. Singing in front of a live audience. Wasn't it all scary? We felt all those emotions countless times. Retiring was heartbreaking to many including us. Still, here you are. Still we move on to inspire new idols who will one day get lost like us. We are here for those that need us. Isn't that amazing?"
I blinked when a flash of colour landed on my shoulder. A petal from one of the bouquets had fallen on my shoulder. A bump in the road had another petal fall on Momo's pot. I wonder what plant this will become in the future. But for that to happen, time needed to pass. Change needed to happen.
"Do you ever regret it?"
"Aikatsu or retiring?"
"Either."
The two smiled. Filling the car with their idol auras. Mixing and intertwining towards me. All the twinkling gems almost blinded me with how they shone. Suddenly I understood what their answer was without them saying it. No ones' aura would shine so beautifully with hatred within them.
"Neither." They said at the same time. My fingers traced her name on the tag. A smile gracing my face.
Like WM, I loved Aikatsu. I have one person to thank for this. She supported me from the start to now. It would be wrong if I couldn't stand by her for her decision. I can't force her to stay for my sake. All I can do is support her from the side as she always did me. That was my role as her idol. As her friend.
"Um Natsuki-san, Kanzaki-san, if it's alright with you... I would like to give this pot to her myself."
"Of course. Do you want me to tell you what it's going to be?"
"No, it's okay. I'm looking forward to what it'll be. She'll take care of it regardless." I knew this for a fact.
This past year has been a collection of beginnings. For me, my friends, for this plant and for many others. What happens next for them isn't for me to control. Momo knows what's to come next for her. Even if she didn't, I'll be there for her. As we always were, together physically or mentally, we could find something. This wasn't an end just yet. Not for a relationship as strong as ours.
The party was in full swing. People from all corners of the entertainment industry filling up the space with their chatter. Most that even I recognized and hoped to have the honour of working with in the future. Some even coming up to me specifically to greet me.
I, for the most part, stood with Hayate to draw the attention to him than me. Seeing the two of us together, people made a lot of comments about the two of us being the main ones they were going to keep an eye on for the Royalty Cup. As the first group of male students to ever be participating in this Starlight event it was a heavy burden to represent a full new form of Aikatsu. Comments about how if the Royalty cup failed, it would set a bad look for future male idols. It really was a cherry on top of a reminder that a whole school year had past.
"Wow. In a party filled with some of the most prestigious faces in the industry and you two stick to your roommate." Karasuma snuck up onto the two of us to snatch the pot in my hand. The one I was slightly avoiding giving to its new owner.
"Like you wouldn't stick to Momo-chan in this kind of event." Hayate held out his hand to take the flower pot back for me. His unit partner unwillingly giving it back. "Fashionable late, Yuki?"
"I just came from holding a busking session that you can check out online later. It was probably my best performance to date. And you should call me Yuki-senpai starting next year. That includes you too, Higawari." The two of us took a second to process what he said and the meaning behind it.
"Are you serious?"
"But auditions for next year haven't even started."
"Who do you think I am?" He proudly stated with his usual cocky attitude. But we both knew that if his mom accepted his Aikatsu, that he finally found his footing. His confidence was going to be his strongest weapon as long as it didn't consume him. Which we couldn't see in him the moment he gave me back the pot.
"The boy that failed the audition his first time and needed to ride my coat-tails as a unit." I held back a laugh at Hayate's sudden insult. It wasn't every one that allowed him to speak un-gentleman like.
"And now I was invited to join by the school's headmistress off the street. Not many can say the same." He adjusted the guitar strap off his back. He did say that he just came from busking. It must have been quite a show if it convinced Headmistress Kiriya to let him into Starlight.
Seeing them together I remember how great they were as a unit. The two of them going to the same school next year already was showing how much they could reveal more of their personalities. Just yesterday Karasuma was storming off the set in anger. Today he was laughing despite knowing his best friend was leaving the school he was entering. I thought he would have been more off standing at this point. But he already bounced back. It may be strange to think but I was proud of him.
Suddenly he slung an arm around my shoulders. "While I would love to gloat some more I'm going to have to continue this conversation another day. I need to borrow this guy."
"E-eh? Me? Why me?" I almost lost my footing when he pulled me away from Hayato without giving me time to think.
I could see from my stumbling which direction we were heading in. "Shiro!"
Momo turned away from the producer she was speaking to. Seeing the two of us, or more like him dragging me over, caused her to shake her head. We could see her bow to the producer in apology before making her way over to us. Karasuma almost letting me drop in front of her if it wasn't for his reflexes. "Shiro, I brought you a present."
"Don't throw him around like a doll. Are you okay Shouta-kun?"
"Y-yes."
"Yu-kun, this is meant to be a celebratory welcome home party. Do not go around messing with the other attendees. To add on top of that you bring the guests of honour in late and your attire is unprofessional. Even for you. As an independent idol you have to be more aware of how you are perceived. Especially in a place like this where you can create connections.
"Well starting next year I'm no longer an independent idol. Maybe I should wear a Starlight uniform to these kinds of parties starting next year. I look the best in blue after all."
"If you're lying to me then I'm keeping you out of this party."
"You know I wouldn't lie about this kind of stuff." Her eyes widen before tackling him into a hug. The two of them laughing with gleeful cheers.
"Congratulations Yu-kun! This sounds like a dream come true. You and Shouta-kun making music together. DEBUT doing more unit activities. Fumiko and you would create such a drastic image difference and you both can learn off each other. Charlotte-senpai too, would easily put you in your place at who loves idols more. I can't wait to see how you'll integrate into such a environment like Starlight."
"Well you could see yourself. If you stay here." They pulled back. Him glancing back at me. "I know that nothing we say can change your mind but if there's a chance I want you to stay. Continue being an idol Shiro."
"I can't do that. Thank you for asking Yu-kun."
"I had to try." Watching them, it was like they could speak with only their eyes.
This was probably the first time I heard him speak so earnestly. Even without her agreeing, he said what he wanted to. Being honest was all he wanted. I wanted to do the same.
"Um Momo-san, can I talk to you for a moment?" She drifted her eyes to the pot. Patting Karasuma on the arm to fully let her go.
"It seems that I'm needed elsewhere. Congratulations again Yu-kun. Enjoy the party today. Don't cause any troubles. Any more troubles." She received a rub on the head, slightly pushing her towards me.
"Yeah yeah I'm going to try getting some of these people's business cards. Go have fun, kids." She grumbled under her breath about their age difference and how he never acted his age.
Compared to when I last saw Momo this morning, I didn't feel afraid to talk to her. Though the topic was going to be heavy, I didn't want to run away. Our footsteps fell into sync as we made our way to our designation. We could have talked in the courtyard or in the main party space. However, without talking about it, we knew the best place for us to talk in private.
I was comforted by sounds of the party growing quiet in the distance. The silence of the night taking over as we sat on the same side of the gazebo. The moon brightly shining over us without being full. The street lamps filling in the darkness that the moon couldn't touch. This place always did feel like we were the only ones in the universe. Untouched by everything that stressed us out.
"Um I uh these are for you. From Natsuki-san." I put the pot on the table.
"Thank you, I was wondering why you were walking around the party with this." She held up the pot to examine it all over. "So? How was meeting WM?"
"It was- they were so- I can't put into words how amazing they were! I mean I knew before today because, you know, they were former top idols but they were completely beyond my imagination!" She patted me on the head. I'm going to miss that.
"I'm glad you think so. I was wondered how you would react by my surprise. Thank you for helping in their delivery and my sudden requests. Remember to build those kinds of connections when I leave Starlight." I bit my lip. "Your reputation itself is enough to garner those from past generations from my name. I know we hate to use my name but you have to take care of yourself and use what you can to your advantage."
I remained silent. How could she just mention her retirement that easily? I learn today how much weight was truly behind her name. And so easily she was willing to give it to me to use as leverage. Because in the end, she was looking out for me. There was no doubt in her mind that the suffering she went through could be turned positive for another person. Possibly at her own expense.
I could only keep my eyes on my lap. As much as she knew me, I knew her. The look of sympathy and understanding was surely on her face. The same as this morning. That's not how I wanted her to look at me. I want her to be proud of me. I want to see her shining on stage with me. I didn't want to be the Star Couple's friend. I wanted to be friends and idols with Suzukawa Momo.
"Sorry I didn't mean to bring you down. I know my decision will still take some time for you to accept."
There was a sense of dread with this being one of the last few times we'll be here together. This was the spot that inspired me to create Blue Moon. We would come here for lunch in between classes. Our guitars playing together sometimes drew a crowd here. Here was where I was most at peace. I could speak here. I could be just her friend here.
"Momo-san?"
"Yes?"
"I have a request for you before you quit. If you can't fulfil it then I won't accept your retirement."
"Shouta-kun that's not-"
"Please?" Sucking in a quick breath, she nodded.
"Anything for you." I shakenly took her hand to make her look at me.
Suzukawa Momo. My idol, my first friend and my biggest inspiration. There was so much I wanted to say and yet nothing at all. From the impromptu meeting to a false scandal to our unit and to today. Both happy and sad memories were with her by my side. My Aikatsu started with her. But it wasn't going to end with her.
"I'm going to miss you so much. Not having you sitting next to me, or in the same school, I mean we barely lasted not talking when we had our scandal. And that was in our first year. What sort of adventures can we get into in our second? Third? Now you're leaving Starlight and the spotlight where I see you shine so beautifully along with it. I miss you now." I sniffed, blinking back my tears. Momo's golden eyes filled up with her own tears. She let me continue.
"When you told me that you wanted to leave Starlight and stop being an idol, I thought what about me? What can I do if my light disappears? Not just my light but my friend? I doubt we'll stop being friends but how can I know that if I can't see you on stage? I can't hear the voice you trained since birth to sing so clearly. When I look backstage or into a crowd, would I be able to find you as you did with me the first time we met?"
My nose became itchy that I sniffled. "Talking to WM today, I learned a side of you that I didn't know. And hearing that, seeing how they are today even after retiring, I learned that being an idol isn't continuous. I saw them as florists walking into the shop. I saw them as retired idols getting into the car. When they were talking to me, I thought wow they really are idols. All of those things are WM."
I licked my drying lips. "I'm not going to stop you from leaving. An idol encourages those around them. An idol shows compassion. When times are tough, you can count on your idol to support you from behind. They lead the way when you're lost. Those are things you taught me. And so so so much more. More than anything, I inspire to be what you are to me. You are my idol. That day that you scouted me, I scouted you. You, Suzukawa Momo, who shines brighter than any star that I'll ever get to witness. Even if you don't want to be in the spotlight, I know I can find you."
"That's why now, my request is to have my idol smile and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Because I know that if you say it, it will come true. Can you do that?" My hands held onto her with all the strength I had.
She instead used the back of my own hand to wipe the tears in my face. "When did you grow up to be such an amazing person?"
Her eyes grew soft looking me over. "Shouta-kun, I know better than anyone how kind hearted and talented you are. I predicted how both you and Yu-kun would react. But as I learned from my experience here, calculations and predictions are useless when it comes to emotions. I never would have thought that this would be how you accept my departure."
Momo's smile was an obvious one. She didn't show off her teeth or wrinkle her forehead. Unless she forced her face to change, there were no visible facial signs to read. Instead I could feel it. The tension and professionalism in her posture drops. Her eyes will stop running over the place. It's easy to see when she was happy.
"You're going to be better than okay. You're going to continue growing each day and I'll be watching from the sidelines as I always have been. You and everyone else are going to be fine without me."
She spoke with confidence despite her eyes saying that she wanted to cry. This was the Momo that I grew with. She cared for people with her words. It wasn't that she didn't trust us with her decision earlier. It's that she loved us to put up a front. But she believed in us more than anyone to accept her.
I wiped my tears once more and met her smile with my own. I wouldn't send her off with a sad face. She changed my life for the better. I had to show her the smile that she was responsible for. "Thank you Momo-san."
"Thank you Shouta-kun." We giggled to ourselves with the tears refusing to fall any more. Tonight was a night of celebration. Shibuki was home, I had met WM, Karasuma was accepted to Starlight and Momo was starting anew. Tears weren't suited for us. All we can do was thank you for introducing such a shining world to one another. That's more like us.
Trivia: 3 more chapters left! The next one is going to be probably the hardest one so far as I planned the least for it. Also might be extremely short or extremely long. Kind of hard to tell. This chapter was meant to be short but last chapter was meant to be longer. The opposite happened. As we are wrapping up as well I want to hear if anyone has any guesses as to who the Starlight Queen and King are? I'm interested if anyone can get both right.
A/N: I just finished watching Idolish7 (guys really go check it out its so good) and I was so surprised that there's a duet unit called Re:Vale that have the members Yuki and Momo. They even have the similar colour scheme as my Momo and Yuki. And I can see a few other similarities between them and my characters like Yuki is introduced an an idol and actor like whatttt. It's so strange but I really like them. Just thought I should clarify that if you've seen the show, I did not base my characters off of them :)