Chapter VII - Cersei I
She wished dinner had gone better for her, what with Father deciding to not punish her half-brother's foolishness. After her reprimand in front of the family, the rest of dinner was not remarkably eventful aside from Jaime being forced to spend several hours reading every day due to something wrong with his mind.
Cersei, to her own surprise, did not mind this change in her twin's routine. At least our bastard kin won't spend all day with him, she thought to herself. Maybe Jaime can finally focus on spending time with me instead of his inferiors.
As the meal was concluded, the plates of honey cakes being cleared from the table by the family servants, Cersei calmly got out of her chair and left the room, making sure to curtsy to Father before she departed. Some servant could get her chair for me, she thought. That is why they are paid in the first place.
She made her way back to her bedchambers and got her hands on a needle and cloth. As she had begun sewing a lion, she heard some knocks on the door. Cersei got up and opened it to see none other than Jason Hill, her half-brother giving her a glare with his one clean eye as well as his other one, whose swelling was not quite as terrible as it earlier was.
"Have I offended you?!"
Cersei heard the anger in Jason's voice and it gave her some satisfaction, though she chose to hide it as he addressed her. "I beg your pardon?"
"You wanted Father to punish me at dinner tonight. If I have offended you, I desire to know so that I may understand your reasons for loathing me?"
"Loathe you? I do not loathe you, Hill. I think you're among the more competent and loyal servants of House Lannister."
Her praise did not seem to appease her father's bastard. "Then why-"
"I simply wanted to ensure you did not step out of line. To insult the eldest son of a bannerman's house is a serious offense, even with a father as powerful as ours."
"Insult?" Jason sounded incredulous. "I did not lay a blow on that giant! I put myself between that…thing and Tarold!"
"If our cousin was fated by the gods to be assaulted so brutally, then it was meant to be," Cersei replied in an unchangingly calm manner. "Besides, he's some cousin from an inferior branch."
"He still has Lannister blood," Jason argued, "and Father agreed with me that I was right to save him."
Cersei snickered. "And what great rewards you earned for your valor: a swollen eye and a sore mouth."
"I'd gladly risk injury for House Lannister," Jason boasted. "They've fed me and raised me well for my life. I'd even go out of my way to save you, in spite of how horribly you treat me."
"You should watch your tongue, bastard," Cersei said with some venom added to the end of that assortment of words. "One day I'll be your queen, and then you'll do whatever I command you to, or at least you will if your claims of wanting to serve House Lannister hold any merit."
"Both of you, cease this at once!"
The two children turned to see the figure of Aunt Genna soon tower over them as she arrived to their location in the halls. She had her hands on her hips as she looked down at them, clearly irritated with their behavior.
"I can't even look after my own boys with your arguing," Genna scolded them. "You two should stop this petty argument and get ready to bed. Act more mature than this nonsense, for the sake of House Lannister if not for my own sanity."
"But I-"
Cersei's attempt to defend herself and cast the blame on her half-brother was interrupted by her aunt pointing a stern finger at her.
"Not another word from you. As for you," Genna said while turning to Jason, "get some rest so your wounds can heal. Gerion told me he wants to take you down to Lannisport. He said you should have some more…harmless fun before returning to the training yards."
She really does sound like Father, Cersei's thought to herself. She turned to see Jason now had a smile on his face after hearing his uncle's plans for the coming morning.
"That…that sounds wonderful. Thank you, Aunt Genna. Tell Uncle Gerion I'll be ready in the morning as soon as the sun comes up."
Cersei rolled her eyes. All three of her brothers - her other half, the bastard, and the little monster - sought to act like fools. She was the only one who wanted to properly serve as the inheritor of Tywin Lannister's legacy, a legacy Jaime cared little for and neither of her brothers would ever have.
As Jason went into his room, Cersei, barely noticing Jaime arrive from the dining hall, decided she had enough and went into her room without even saying a "good night" to him.
I'll make him wait to see me, she thought to herself. He'll miss me as he's stuck reading books with Father and the old maester. I'll see him collapse into my arms this afternoon before dinner is served.
…
The next morning, Cersei was in a large room with her Aunt Genna and Septa Edeline as they worked on their sewing skills, with Edeline also taking the time to teach her about history.
Cersei did not care at all for sewing skills, to be forced to sit for hours with a needle in hand simply to put a lion on some tapestry. It felt menial, a needless chore that some worthless smallfolk could do.
No, Cersei thought, I would much rather be wielding a sword in the training yard like the pages and squires here at Casterly Rock. That way I won't be cooped up in here like a hen, and perhaps Jaime would spend more time with me compared to Jason.
It was at that moment that she pondered to herself what to make of her bastard half-brother. His bright golden hair was evidence enough of his Lannister blood, so Cersei had to accept their shared descent from Tywin Lannister. Cersei had heard all about how her mother Joanna, for some reason unknown to her, accepted the boy into the household and cared for him, at least until her worthless little brother Tyrion killed her upon leaving her womb.
Jason did spend much time with Jaime in the yard, but he did seem to want little more than to serve the family. For as much as she disliked him, Cersei knew Jason posed no threat to Jaime as heir.
Perhaps that was what Mother intended by having him raised here at Casterly Rock, she thought to herself. I would not be so critical of Jason Hill if he weren't so close to that little monster. He and Jaime both seem to have that weakness, that they want to protect that disgusting dwarf. When I am queen, I'll make Tyrion pay for what he did to Mother.
"Your sewmanship is excellent, Lady Cersei."
Septa Edeline's comments snapped Cersei out of her thoughts. As she was distracted, Cersei managed to see that, in her thoughtlessness, she had managed to sew a lion onto the cloth given to her.
"Indeed it is," remarked Aunt Genna. "Cersei, say thank you to Septa Edeline for her compliment."
Cersei forced a smile onto her face as she uttered "thank you" to the bothersome septa, but a scowl would have more accurately displayed how she felt towards the other two women in the room.
Edeline had come to Casterly Rock as a septa from Oldtown, a lowborn who managed to reside at the home of the powerful House Lannister. Cersei hated how the old bag, who came to her home shortly before she was born, always told her to act like a weak and helpless girl day in and day out. She had Cersei read useless books on history, sew lions into clothes, and even taught her how to smile "properly."
Edeline made Cersei feel as if she were a doll to be played with. If only Father did not view her as being "valuable" towards her "education," then Cersei could get rid of her and perhaps spend some time in the training yard with Jaime. Then again, Jaime was now stuck reading for hours a day in some room thanks to Father and the old maester who Tyrion loves so much.
It was as if fate sought to rip her apart from Jaime again and again until their love for one another was diminished, but Cersei knew this would never be so.
"Cersei," Aunt Genna said, "I believe we should discuss your behavior last night towards your brother."
"Half-brother," Cersei corrected her. "And what is there to discuss? I was merely explaining politics to our family's servant for his own education."
"Demeaning someone and educating them is not the same," Genna sternly lectured. "He did nothing wrong yesterday with the Clegane boy in the yard. Antagonizing those closest to you will not earn you their loyalty, especially when he is so close to your brother Jaime."
"When I am Prince Rhaegar's queen, loyalty will not need to be earned by any means other than my title and the power given to me by my birth. If they are not loyal, they will be dealt with accordingly."
"When you are Prince Rhaegar's queen," Genna said, "your half-brother Jason will be an important ally. He can be a skilled advisor who can help serve Jaime at Casterly Rock, or he could be a skilled commander who will keep you and your children safe. Someday, you may be able to convince your husband to bestow honors and titles upon him to make him a more grateful servant."
Cersei sneered and looked out the window in the room, the Rock being comprised of many holes to look outside at the Sunset Sea. "Grateful? He should be grateful to Father for not leaving him with the harlot who birthed him."
"That's enough of that, Cersei!"
The girl flinched and looked back to see her aunt looking at her with rage in her eyes. At that moment, Cersei knew that Genna had to be Lord Tywin's sister, as no other person could strike so much dread into those who angered them as the Lion of Casterly Rock. Genna may have been a woman, but growing up with her house being mocked and jeered by the entirety of the Westerlands made her someone who would not allow others to insult her pride.
"Jason is still your father's son," Genna said to Cersei using as much calm as she could maintain with her spoiled niece. "And whoever Jason's mother is, that is none of your concern. You should treat him with more dignity if you wish for him to be a loyal ally as an adult. I will not tolerate any more of this insulting behavior, do you understand?"
Cersei sighed in defeat. "Yes, Aunt Genna."
…
Lunch with Aunt Genna would be rather silent for Cersei. The cooks prepared for them a freshly-killed duck covered in a dressing made from an assortment of vegetables and spices, accompanied by strawberries, a tomato soup prepared alongside pieces of bread, and a small cake. Aunt Genna had some wine that had been brewed in Lannisport as Cersei, still being young at only nine years of age, was forced to have some water, not being large enough yet to enjoy beverages meant for grown lords and ladies.
Cersei did not wish to speak with Aunt Genna then, knowing that she would simply disagree with her about Jason and Tyrion. It was therefore a great relief for her when she was allowed to leave the room to go back to her chambers.
Thank the Gods, she thought. I don't have to sew another stupid face onto clothes for the rest of the day.
She went down the hall towards her room when she noticed that one chamber had its door open. It soon occurred to Cersei that it was the room that Father slept in, not to mention the one he shared with her mother before that disgusting little beast tore her open upon his birth.
Walking towards it as softly as she could, Cersei peeked inside and tried to look around it. The floors were reflecting some light, having just been washed and cleaned. But as Cersei looked up, she saw a servant girl standing near the bedside drawer that had once been her mother's. At first, Cersei didn't know what the girl was doing looking down at the drawer. That changed when Cersei saw a small ruby necklace falling to the side of the girl's hand, hanging as the servant girl was holding the middle if it in her hands.
This worthless girl is stealing from my house, Cersei thought to herself, rage beginning to boil inside of her. She loudly opened the door and barged into the room, and the servant girl could only flinch from surprise and stare at the young noblewoman in horror that she had been caught.
"How dare you," Cersei yelled. "My father lets you work in the greatest castle in all seven kingdoms, and you reward his generosity with thievery?!"
The servant girl hurriedly set down the necklace before getting down on her knees.
"Please, m'lady! I never wanted to steal from Lord Tywin! I was merely looking at the fine piece of jewelry and simply lost myself! Please forgive me!"
Cersei, in the midst of her anger, looked over this little thief. She was a decently plain girl, nothing special about her. Short brown hair a tad past the shoulders, teeth looked ordinary, and she had eyes to match her hair's color.
"What is your name, commoner?"
The girl was trembling on her knees as the fear of severe repercussions overcame her. "M-M-Marisila, m'lady. Please, whatever sin I have committed, it was nothing that involved my mother or father or brother."
"I will determine that much myself," Cersei roared. "My father is preoccupied with ensuring the security and well-being of the Westerlands, so I shall ensure justice is carried out myself. GUARDS!"
Without even turning her head back, Cersei called for her father's men to come in. She knew that they recognized her voice, that they viewed her as having the real power in Casterly Rock when their lord Tywin was off serving King Aerys in King's Landing.
As she had hoped, two guards in Lannister armor came into the room within less than a minute to inspect what the issue was. They were confused to see their lord's daughter angry and a servant girl on her knees to the point of tears.
"Is everything alright, Lady Cersei," one of them asked. He was a tall man who was rather lean in stature. His partner was a tad shorter yet had a similar body shape.
"This servant girl was tasked with cleaning my father's bedchamber, and instead took it upon herself to steal a necklace belonging to my late mother, Lady Joanna Lannister."
"P-please! I was merely looking at it! I never would steal from the Hand of the-"
Marisila would be silenced by Cersei striking her as hard as she could with the back of her hand. The guards flinched as the girl whimpered and sniffled on the floor, tears forming out of the edges of her eyes.
"Get up," Cersei coldly ordered. "That was just a taste of what you will get for your punishment, lowborn filth. Guards," she turned to them, "drag this thief back to my chambers."
"Shouldn't…" the shorter one said, "shouldn't we tell your father about this?"
"My father is holding court to ensure the stability of his lands. I will make sure he is not distracted from his duties. Now do as I say and bring this girl to my chambers lest I tell my father of your disobedience."
She left the room and walked back to her chambers in an aggressive manner, her heeled shoes making loud sounds on the floor with every step. Cersei heard the sound of the guards behind her attempting to keep up, along with the whimpers of that worthless little thief.
When the guards entered her room after her, Cersei made sure to look around the halls to make sure no one in the halls could hear her before locking the door. Cersei then turned to look down at the pathetic, weeping commoner who sought to steal from her family.
"M'lady," Marisila softly begged, her eyes red from her incessant crying, "please, have mercy-"
"Silence! Be thankful I don't have my men cut off your hands to feed the kennelmaster's hounds. As for you two," Cersei said to the two guards, "one of you hold her, the other one strikes her in the face."
The taller one swallowed. "Y-yes, Lady Cersei…"
He went behind Marisila and held her up by the arms as the servant girl was seemingly too scared to even fight back. The shorter guard curled his fist into a ball and, after a deep breath, struck Marisila's face as hard as he could, his metal-covered knuckles connecting with the area surrounding her eye. Marisila let out a scream of pain followed by more crying. Cersei saw the shorter guard wince at her pain and she thought to herself of how weak her uncle Kevan was, allowing such easily startled men into the service of House Lannister.
"Are you a girl or a soldier," Cersei sneered. "You strike her next. Now. Or I'll tell my father you should be relieved of your duties serving House Lannister."
The short guard was very clearly reluctant to follow her orders, but he would do so anyway to ensure he would be paid. He took his fist and struck Marisila around the same area of the face where his fellow guard had done so. She screamed again and began to sob and weep.
"M'lady," she spoke between her sniffling, "I'm sorry…"
"I didn't tell you to speak, commoner," Cersei snarled. "It seems that your eyes betrayed you by making you desire my mother's necklace. So you two guards should strike her until her left eye is closed shut. Permanently."
"M'lady, please-"
Marisila didn't have the time to finish her plea for mercy before the shorter guard struck her again in the left eye, and the servant girl let out another scream of suffering before resuming her sobbing. The shorter one did so again, and again, and again…
With each strike, Cersei heard the servant girl's cries become weaker and softer. She smirked to herself, for it seemed this peasant was no longer weeping about how she "didn't deserve" to be punished for her thievery. Cersei knew Father would be pleased that she handled this whilst he was preoccupied with more important.
Cersei uttered "stop" when Marisila's cries were now just whimpers, though she heard an odd sound the last time the shorter guard's fist struck the girl's face. The two guards were breathing heavily and quickly stepped back from the girl, who quickly covered her left eye. Cersei had been so busy thinking of how Father would praise her that she didn't notice this lowborn was bleeding from her left eye, the red liquid dripping beneath her fingers down onto her cheek.
But this did not deter Cersei or cause her to retch or shiver in horror. She simply walked up to Marisila and looked down at her.
"Show me," she said with as much authority as she could. "Show me your eye, and I will let you go with just this warning."
Shivering and sobbing, Marisila removed her hand from her face and looked up at her Lord's daughter. What Cersei saw was once considered a left eye, but rather than the white liquid that ran in her right eye, she saw an eye filled with blood entirely. It was likely this servant girl couldn't see a thing from that eye.
Good, Cersei thought to herself with pride. She won't be able to see as much jewelry for her to steal, least of all from my late mother. This commoner can warn the rest of her worthless family not to steal from House Lannister.
"Go," she calmly said. "Find somewhere to bandage your worthless eye. Tell others about what you did if anyone dares to ask. Do you understand?"
Marisila, continuing to sob and whimper, nodded at the lady whom she could only see with her one eye.
"Good. Now leave."
Putting her hands over her left eye, the servant girl got onto her feet and slowly walked out of the room, and much to Cersei's annoyance, she didn't bother to be quiet about it. Marisila wept and whimpered as she left the room, and Cersei saw that the two guards were oddly perturbed about it.
Idiots, she thought to herself. They punished a thief and now they feel guilty about it? Such weak guards, I'll ask Father to replace them.
"The two of you," she addressed them, "should not tell anyone about what happened here until my father, the Hand of the King and Warden of the West, hears about it first, do you understand?"
The two guards looked at one another before looking at her.
"Yes, m'lady," said the shorter one in a quiet manner.
"Of course, Lady Cersei," the taller one similarly replied.
"Good. Now leave, hopefully without weeping like that little thief did a minute ago."
The two men did as they were told, not saying a word as they exited her bedchambers. Once they had left, Cersei closed the door to her room and suddenly felt the urge to smile. She had just enforced justice on a thief, and one who had dared to steal her mother's jewels. Father would obviously commend her for her bravery in foiling such a lowborn criminal.
That girl's punishment was nothing compared to what Father could have done to her, she thought to herself. My own grandfather, Lord Tytos, had a mistress who dared to treat herself to my grandmother's jewels. But Father paraded her naked around Lannisport to show the city how much of a whore she was.
…
A couple of hours had passed, and Cersei had decided to read. It wasn't something she did as often as some other girls, but if Father would not let her near the training yard, she might as well look intelligent to make him even more pleased. The book she was reading now was a chronicle of the life of King Jaehaerys the Conciliator written by some archmaester more than a hundred years prior. She was at the part where the king found out his daughter, Saera, had been intimate with multiple young lords when she heard someone knocking at her door.
"Lady Cersei, your father wishes to speak with you immediately."
Cersei had a wide smile on her face as she closed her book and got off of her bed. She opened the door to see two guards ready to accompany her. It made Cersei feel almost special to have such an escort, so she did not suspect anything as they led her to her father's quarters.
When she entered the room, Cersei expected to see him looking calm and almost proud of her work to stop the thief from earlier. Instead, Lord Tywin looked slightly irritated and displeased, causing her heart to drop.
"Sit."
One word from her father caused the girl to immediately place herself on the chair facing his desk. Tywin then looked up at the guards.
"Leave us."
The guards bowed and did as asked. It was then it hit Cersei that she may not be receiving praise from her father for her actions, but discipline.
"Father, I only-"
"Don't," her father stated, his calm voice not remotely reflecting whatever anger he felt at that moment. "I know what happened with you and that servant girl."
"Who…who told you?"
Lord Tywin took a deep breath through his nose as if he were about to say something with great reluctance or exasperation. "Tyrion."
Cersei heard his answer, which was almost a growl or a snarl, but instead of fear of her father, rage at her youngest brother coursed through her.
That worthless little monster, she thought to herself. He killed Mother and now he seeks to torment me further? I should pay some mercenary to sever his cock in his sleep and feed it to him. Serves him right, that useless abomination.
"I told him nothing," Cersei tried to defend himself. "How would he know what happened?"
"It would seem," Tywin replied, "the servant girl you brutalized encountered him in the halls of Casterly Rock. The two then came to me to tell me of what occurred, as well as the two guards you forced to aid you in your attempt at inflicting punishment."
"She was stealing from us! That commoner filth had one of Mother's jewels in her hands! I was only-"
"You forced two household guards to follow your orders rather than have them report to me. I could have dealt with this myself, and instead I have to compensate the girl's family because I was unable to properly administer justice in this case."
"I-I-I punished her as you would have done, Father!"
"What is the punishment for thievery in Westeros," Tywin asked.
"...losing a finger or a hand or a nose, depending on the severity."
Lord Tywin breathed loudly through his nose. "The girl was nine years of age. If anything, her father should have been punished for allowing his child to act in such a manner. But your intervention without my permission has forced me to protect our reputation from your actions. Do you understand?"
Cersei, looking down at her feet, nodded. "Yes, Father. It will not happen again."
"Good. You are dismissed."
Tywin took a pen, tapped it twice in ink, and began writing on a piece of paper as if Cersei were not in the room. Cersei stood up and bowed to him, biting her lip so as to try and prevent herself from sniffling her tears, and quickly made her way out of her father's chambers.
She felt humiliated and betrayed. After how she defended her family from a thief, Father didn't care. He scolded her as if she had been the one responsible rather than the one-eyed servant girl. All Cersei wanted was to enforce the law in place of her Lord Father, and she received no thanks for her effort.
And she knew it was Tyrion's fault. That worthless little shit.
Cersei stomped loudly as she headed towards Tyrion's bedchambers, which he shared with his brother & half-brother. She threw the door open hoping to find him alone, but unfortunately, Jaime and Jason were there with him sitting. She glared at Tyrion regardless, and if a look could kill, hers would have been like a dagger to the stomach.
"You slandered me to Father!"
Tyrion clearly did not expect her to enter, and he now looked terrified beyond belief. "She…she was so sad! I just wanted to help-"
"She stole our mother's jewels! I punished her for it, and you ruined it!"
Jaime got up to try and comfort Cersei as Jason, his eye looking noticeably less swollen from yesterday, moved in between the twins and Tyrion in a protective stance.
"Cersei, please, just calm down," Jaime pleaded, holding Cersei's hands. "Tyrion didn't mean to upset you, he just wanted to help the girl."
"Every time, you take his side! EVERY TIME! Why?! He killed our mother, the little monster, and you always defend him! WHY?!"
Cersei felt the cold tears descend her cheeks to the floor as her frustration reached its highest point of that day. Regardless of that, Jaime did not let her pass, instead gently wiping away her tears with his hands.
"Cersei, please calm down. Tyrion didn't mean anything by it, he just wanted to do what he thought was best."
Rather than improving the situation, as her twin might have hoped, Cersei merely scowled and pulled her hands away from him. She pushed away Jaime and walked up to Jason, who stood firm in her presence as Tyrion hid behind his bastard brother's legs.
Cersei looked at his eyes and sneered. "Your eye looks better than yesterday, bastard."
"You don't sound too happy about that," Jason Hill replied, "'my lady.'"
"Why are you so protective of him," she angrily asked him. "The little monster who took away the woman that let you into our home, who is ahead of you behind Jaime in the line of succession?"
She expected Jason to yell at her in defense of himself and Tyrion. To her surprise, he merely sighed.
"If you had just told Father about that girl earlier, he would have punished her or her father and you would have gotten all the praise for it. That's what you wanted right? And besides, Father didn't even punish you for it."
Cersei heard her half-brother's words and did not respond. All she could do was clench her fists tightly, and in spite of the pain, the fact that she was the one being made out as the wrongdoer here pained her a thousand times more.
She turned to glare at Tyrion, with Jason moving slightly to further put his body between her and his youngest half-brother.
"Tell me, when you found that half-blind thieving commoner girl, where did you come from?"
No doubt plotting to ruin my name in this home, the worthless little creature, Cersei thought to herself.
Tyrion swallowed and managed to speak, being very clearly scared of her wrath. "Uncle Ger-Gerion was helping me with something after he came back from Lannisport with J-Jason. It's called a…a cartwheel, a form of tumbling. Uncle Gerion began teaching me it two w-weeks ago. Look."
The unusually small child raised his hands up in the air and rolled on his side. Cersei, slightly confused as to what Tyrion was doing, expected him to fall down on his ugly large head, but he instead was carried by his hands, able to land back on his feet.
Jaime smiled. "At the very least, no arrow will hit you should Casterly Rock ever come under attack."
As Jason Hill chuckled, Cersei stood perfectly still until the room again filled with silence. She then threw herself against the wall…and laughed. Out of all the things in the world she could have done, Cersei found herself laughing at her little brother's stupid trick. She could not explain why, if it was because she was tired or because she was genuinely amused or if she was giving up, but here she was, laughing like a buffoon watching a mummer's performance in the streets of Lannisport.
She heard Jaime snicker. "You've done it now, Tyrion. Our sister has gone completely mad."
It was that remark that made Cersei depart her brothers' room, though she was still laughing at Tyrion's idiotic trick. She didn't know why that little monster's tumbling "cartwheel" that Gerion had taught him was so humorous to her, for Cersei had rarely laughed before in her life. Her father loathed laughter after so many lords and ladies mocked and ridiculed his own father, the fat and weak Tytos Lannister. If he were to see her now, she would be in more trouble than she already was after Tyrion slandered her.
And yet as she closed the door to her bedchambers behind her and fell onto her bed, all Cersei could do was laugh at the horrible day she had, that was ruined by the worst member of her family.
She would continue to laugh almost hysterically in her room for several minutes without ceasing. When Cersei did eventually regain control over her breathing, it was because her lungs had run out of air to expel from her lungs.
...
...
Hey guys, I am so sorry for the long wait. The fall was insanely busy and I constantly changed how I wanted to end this chapter. I hope you enjoy this perspective into the infamous Cersei's head when she was a child. Next up is Jason Hill's third time in the spotlight!