Chapter 3 - Wolf of the Jedi
That could have gone much worse but Anakin doesn't dare to breathe a sigh of relief, even as he's trotting after Obi-Wan and Windu down the hallway. They implied they weren't going to chain him up again or something much worse but he doesn't know that he can trust that. He doesn't trust them in the slightest.
And... he doesn't know if he's going to be able to see Ahsoka anymore. He doesn't want to lose her like that. But none of the adults approve of their friendship and – he doesn't even know where they're taking him now and neither does Ahsoka. Maybe he'll find a way to see her again but right now he's mostly afraid of making the Jedi angry at him.
He knows how to be obedient, though. How to keep his masters from getting angry... most of the time.
Even if he's so tired of always having to do that.
"What am I supposed to do with him?" Obi-Wan asks as they walk.
"Just keep an eye on him. We have yet to determine what he is. Until then, we will have to keep him here."
Greaaaat. So they haven't even decided what they're going to do with him long-term, yet.
Well.
At least they aren't chaining him anymore. Yet. He's unreasonably grateful for that even if it doesn't feel like he should have to be. Sidious wouldn't have listened to any arguments if Anakin had resisted him like he just did with the Jedi. So maybe being here is still better. A tiny bit.
Obi-Wan takes Anakin to what looks like an enormous library. There are so many rows of shelves that he's getting cross-eyed looking at them, especially because the shelves are full of almost identical-looking bluish-colored holobooks. Or... something, There are desks with computers on the far end of this hallway.
But it looks fascinating in here. For a moment, he desperately misses his human form. He misses being able to do things. He hasn't been able to do anything since he was captured by the Jedi.
He misses working on ships in his spare time and there's so much more he could study about them here. But he can't as a wolf and that's annoying. But better the Jedi think he's an animal than find out that he's a Sith.
Obi-Wan takes one of the holobooks off the shelf, going over to one of the computers and turning it on. It looks like he's researching some planet – Anakin doesn't follow what, though he's trying to read it from over his shoulder because he has nothing else to do. Doesn't know if he's allowed to wander or not.
Obi-Wan glances down at him, some minutes later. "You don't need to just stand there, as long as you stay quiet and stay close."
Anakin eyes him warily. That... could be a direction just to test him but he's tired of being caged in small spaces and the aisles are by far long enough to run around in. He turns away, bounding down the aisles.
He tries to be careful not to go too far at first and keeps glancing back at Obi-Wan but he doesn't seem to be paying him much attention so he keeps going just a little bit further.
And eventually, he starts to wonder if Obi-Wan doesn't care half as much about what he's doing as he expected, as long as he's not disturbing anyone.
He knows he's constantly being watched but at least he's able to run free here and it makes him feel just a tiny bit freer than he has the entire time he's been at the Temple.
He nearly loses himself running through the hallways of the library and maybe for the first time he can actually say he's enjoying himself just the tiniest bit – at least for the moments he forgets why he's here and that he's still a prisoner.
The memory brings him crashing back to reality and he hastily dodges the groups of younglings who keep trying to run up to him, making his way back to where Obi-Wan is working so he doesn't get lost again.
It's long after dark by the time they leave the Archives.
Obi-Wan takes him to the cafeteria after that. It's full of other adults and everyone keeps staring at him. He wishes they would stop it.
He' s not expecting to get a full bowl of food or get a second helping when he finishes, though.
Not even Mom gave him that much food – she wasn't able to.
After that he settles for hiding under the table and inspecting Obi-Wan's unreasonably shiny boots until he's done eating because at least that way everyone will stop looking at him.
Also, who in the world has boots that shiny anyway? It seems a little bit insane. Not even his master did.
Obi-Wan takes him to halls of rooms. The room he takes him into is large, with a bed and a desk and a couple cushions on the floor. There are various personal items Anakin can't entirely identify scattered around, too. The room also smells like Obi-Wan. And that means it must be his room.
Why did he take him to his room?
Anakin lingers in the doorway, the thread of comfortableness he was starting to cling to evaporating entirely. Obi-Wan's not his master but he's still – still has that kind of role. Being in his room is – not a good thing. If he does the slightest thing wrong, that could end very badly. Masters are always picky about their personal-space-whatever that they never let anyone else have.
A concern that's only furthered cemented when all Obi-Wan says is a "don't break anything," before he goes about doing... whatever he is.
Anakin opts for sitting in front of the door before he doesn't know what else to do. Obi-Wan keeps glancing at him but doesn't say anything, at least until telling him to make himself comfortable for the night. And not to run off.
He stays where he is, watching as the Jedi goes to sleep. He probably wouldn't be half as comfortable about it if he knew Anakin was a Sith, not a wolf.
Anakin's not really comfortable at the thought of going to sleep in here at all, though. Not in front of someone he doesn't trust in the slightest but he's going to have to get used to it, apparently.
The carpet in here is as soft as it was in Ahsoka's room, though. Softer than anything he's ever slept on. He didn't mean to eventually doze off but he must've because he doesn't awaken again until nearly dawn.
**w**
The next week passes with pretty much the same schedule, though Obi-Wan often goes to teach the younger Jedi or practice lightsaber sparring with other Knights and has Anakin wait outside the room while he's doing that. It gives him a lot of time to explore, though, and that's actually fun.
He keeps expecting Obi-Wan to be more like his master. To yell at him or hurt him, but he... doesn't. Not that it means much when he's only known him for a week but...
He doesn't talk to him the way Ahsoka did, though. He pretty much ignores him most of the time even if Anakin often sees him watching him.
He misses Ahsoka, so much. It's only been a week but he only knew her for a week and he wants to see her again before it's been too long. He could never forget anyone he came to care for but he doesn't know that it'll be true in reverse. And really, he just wants to be with her again. The connection between them was different than what he's ever had before. It felt like something almost sibling, even if he's probably getting way ahead of himself because he doesn't even know her. Even if she told him more about herself in the few days they talked then Maul literally ever did.
But at least things are slightly better than they were when he first came here. For now. He's still afraid it's not going to last.
**w**
When Anakin wakes up the next morning, it's to hear the faintest sound of shuffling and movement. He cracks an eye open, scanning Obi-Wan's room.
Usually he's the first one up. This is the first time he ever slept when the other occupant of the room wasn't already sleeping and thus not a potential threat.
Obi-Wan is standing next to his table in the corner that has stuff on it Anakin hasn't bothered to investigate yet. He would've ignored it entirely, if not for how strongly he can feel... grief? from him. He's noticed there are times the Jedi radiates a strange amount of loneliness but now it seems especially strong.
He hardly seems to talk to anyone unless its mission related so maybe that's why. It's like he's not close with anyone. Which of course he isn't because the Jedi aren't supposed to be but that sounds so lonely.
That doesn't quite explain the pain he presently senses, though.
Anakin stands hesitantly, silently approaching behind him. Now that he's closer, he can see what the Jedi is looking at. It's a hologram picture of someone – a man who looks fairly old since his practically shoulder-length brown hair is turning gray.
He looks maybe old enough to be Obi-Wan's... parent?
They don't look that similar but the pain and longing he senses reminds him very much of how he feels about Mom.
Did Obi-Wan lose his... father? Or however exactly Jedi have parents?
He should probably sit down and leave him alone but he's never liked seeing it when anyone is hurting. He always wants to make it better. Sidious told him that was weak. Maul did too even if he was nicer about it.
Mom told him the biggest problem in the galaxy is that no one ever helps anyone else.
It's not what Sith do but Sidious always said Sith are helping people too even if they're using their own power to do it. Not that Anakin has any power worth speaking of and he never has.
But he doesn't want to do nothing. Even if this will probably prove to be a mistake.
Anakin patterns up to him hesitantly, only half sure what he's going to do. Obi-Wan looks up sharply and Anakin thinks he would've ignored him entirely if he hadn't sat back on his hind legs so he's taller and licked his face.
The Knight makes a very disgruntled noise, jerking back from him.
...Fine.
Anakin drops back onto all fours, watching him.
Obi-Wan pointedly wipes his face off in his robes – hey, he was trying to be nice – and turns to look at him.
Anakin's half a mind to back away entirely, desperately hoping he didn't seriously overstep some boundary here. But then Obi-Wan slowly reaches for him. The gesture doesn't look like it's meant to be threatening but he tenses up anyway, backing off a step.
A hand lightly touches his head, stroking his fur in this half-hearted I-have-never-done-this-in-my-life-and-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing sort of way.
Air feels tight in his lungs and he doesn't move, staying completely rigid under it.
It feels nice.
But it's an adult who's doing it and he can't trust it no matter how much he misses being touched.
Anakin barks, gaze flicking to the picture.
Who is that?
He can't tell if the Knight understands what he's saying or not. He seems a lot more clueless about it than Ahsoka did. "He was my master," Obi-Wan says quietly, hand dropping back to his side, "He was lost... years ago."
Oh.
It's like he guessed then. They must've been close.
Anakin licks his hand.
How else is he supposed to make him feel better? There's nothing else he can do. Can't say why he even cares when this is one of the mean Jedi. But it's probably the reason Sidious always called him a worthless Sith, meant to be their Dog, because he was always too... caring.
Obi-Wan huffs in wordless annoyance but he doesn't smear it off like he's about to die from it this time. "I was there but I wasn't able to get to him in time to stop it."
He thinks he's talking to an animal. That's why he's talking about this at all, isn't it?
Anakin can sense the traces of guilt and a fear that he's going to fail like that again.
Anakin knows that fear of failing far too personally. He's always been terrified of it because he can't. But that's what always drives him to keep trying because he can't not try. What he's capable of doing is all he's worth. The emotion he senses from the Jedi feels more like a... hopeless giving-up kind of fear of failing.
He licks his hand again.
What else is he supposed to say?
Obi-Wan half-absently pats Anakin's head again before standing, He puts the picture away and seems to be trying to refocus on something else entirely even if Anakin can still sense the lingering traces of his emotion.
He doesn't say another word about it, though, almost as though nothing happened at all.
**w**
He knows Jedi go on missions everywhere. He just wasn't expecting to hear that Obi-Wan's going on one now and apparently leaving him in the custody of Windu, of all people in the galaxy.
He can't deny the tiniest swell of disappointmentdeep in his chest and he doesn't know what to think of that.
He shouldn't be getting attached to a Jedi.
Ahsoka is different.
But – caring about an older Jedi is dangerous. Maybe it's not really that he cares about him so much as that he's getting used to having a new master who is maybe a tiny bit kinder than Sidious but...
He definitely doesn't want to get dumped off on Windu.
He looks so cold even if he doesn't smell quite as scary as the impression he usually gives off. Could just be that he's not irritated right now, though. He's certainly not eyeing Anakin in an overly friendly way.
Windu takes him to the Room of One Thousand Fountains. The room is enormous and it looks like being outdoors somewhere with actual plant life. There are trees of more kinds than he's seen in his entire life – which doesn't mean much because he's hardly seen any trees before – and it's beautiful in here. It feels... peaceful. The fountains of water that are interspersed between the trees are even more relaxing. He's never seen so much water in one place before.
Windu doesn't pay him much mind after that. Anakin keeps feeling his eyes on him but he doesn't say anything. He finally just opts for trying to ignore him entirely and starts running between the trees, climbing over the ones that have huge enough branches for him to balance on. It's amazing in here.
And that's when he hears a sudden familiar squeal.
Anakin looks up sharply, sniffing the air, right in time to spot Ahsoka running out from behind one of the fountains.
"Hey!" she calls eagerly.
Excitement blooms in his chest and he races forward, running up to the Togruta and licking her face as she attempts to escape his tongue long enough to wind her arms around his neck. He missed her. It's been a constant obsessive knowledge inside of him but he somehow didn't even realize how much until she's here again.
But Windu is here and he doesn't like it when they talk. Anakin really doesn't want to pull away, but...
"I didn't expect to see you here," Ahsoka says. She's still squeezing him and doesn't seem to have any intention of letting go. She doesn't seem to care that there's people who can see and Anakin doesn't understand that anymore than he can understand how she had the strength to backtalk her masters and get him out of trouble.
Anakin barks, nuzzling against her. He never expected to be brought to a place like this either.
"How have you been?" Ahsoka asks when she finally steps back.
He barks.
Better than before. He wants to thank her for it but doesn't really know how to. She helped him and she didn't have to. She's the reason he's not chained again.
"Have you been good?" she asks in a tone that sound like a failed attempt to be authoritative.
He laughs. Can't help it.
She's asking him if he's behaving?
He barks his agreement, though.
There are eyes on them now and Anakin turns to see several other younglings staring at him with varying levels of curiosity and awe and maybe a tiny bit of wariness.
A Force presence lightly brushes his shields. It's soft and feather-like and it instantly draws Anakin's gaze to the youngling standing in the front. The Zabrak girl can't be any older than five, from how tiny she is and the shortness of her black hair.
"Hi," she says almost shyly when she realizes he's looking at her.
"He likes being talked to," Ahsoka announces, patting Anakin's head.
He barks his agreement – it's the only time he doesn't feel quite so lonely. Though he's glad the adults don't talk to him much because that would be uncomfortable.
The Zabrak girl walks up to him, studying him curiously. She keeps touching him with the Force but not in an extremely annoying way like when the adults were trying to study him or something.
The horns visible in her black hair makes him think suddenly of Maul. He's the last Zabrak Anakin saw.
"Does he have a name?" the girl asks.
"I don't know," Ahsoka replies.
Anakin barks.
My name is Anakin.
Or Vader, as Sidious decided to name it. Sidious claims that was going to be his birth name before his mother ran away with him. Which is all the more reason for him not to want it. It's his slave name. People on Tatooine had those sometimes. He wants the name Mom gave him.
"I think he's saying yes," Ahsoka announces.
"He is," the girl agrees, studying him. The look in her eyes is oddly intense for a five-year-old. "I'm Mill Alibeth."
Mill.
The name fits her perfectly.
"Why's he here?"
Ahsoka shrugs. "I think he's the Jedi's new wolf. He used to be a Sith hound but he's gonna stay here now."
Anakin rather likes that thought, actually. He doesn't want to spend the rest of his life like this but it's better than anything he's had before – except for maybe on Tatooine when Mom was there, when he had a family.
Mill frowns. "He's an animal? He doesn't feel like one."
Anakin's heart skips a beat. How does she know? No one's expressed any indication of guessing what he is, not even Ahsoka. How does this five-year-old know that? If the Jedi find out now, he's definitely going to lose all the freedom he's been starting to get and he doesn't want that to happen. Sidious told him horrible things about what the Jedi do to Sith.
"He's smart," Ahsoka volunteers brightly.
"I feel his feelings," Mill objects, waving a hand, "I feel everyone's loudly. Animals don't feel stuff that way. They feel too but it's not so noisy."
She's good at sensing emotions? It must be her gift in the Force because otherwise there's no way more experienced Jedi wouldn't have figured it out by now.
Ahsoka looks at him like she's seeing him for the first time. "Are you sentient?" she asks.
It sounds so, so silly he'd find the sheer blunt childishness of it funny if not for the circumstances.
He could lie and deny it. But if he wasn't sentient, he shouldn't understand what the question means in the first place. And from the way Mill is studying him physically and sensing it in the Force, he doesn't think she's going to believe him anyway.
Anakin barks.
Maybe.
"I don't think he wants to say," Ahsoka observes.
"He's... scared," Mill realizes, eyes widening.
Anakin growls, tail flicking.
It's a secret.
And one they aren't going to let go so he has to be sure they don't say anything to anyone about it.
"You don't want anyone to know?" Mill inquires, frowning.
This is too much for him to just hope they don't tell anyone. He needs to communicate with them and it's a risk when he's in a room surrounded by so many Jedi but maybe it's one worth taking. Throwing a quick glance around, it doesn't look like Windu's watching him right now.
Anakin reaches out with the Force as subtly as he can, simultaneously nudging Ahsoka's and Mill's minds. He's never done anything like this before but it's worth trying.
"Please don't tell anyone," he requests in their minds.
Both jump slightly at the suddenness of it, eyes going wide.
"Was that you?!" Ahsoka squeaks.
"Yes. But I don't want anyone else to know." Anxiety is rolling in his gut at even carrying on this conversation in the first place.
"Why're you scared?" Mill asks. He can feel her confusion mixed with sympathy. She wants to make him feel better maybe because she can sense so strongly how he's feeling.
But how is he supposed to explain that to them? They trust the adults here. They won't understand why he can't. "They won't let me be here anymore if they know," Anakin supplies. "Don't tell anyone."
They both hesitate.
"We won't," Ahsoka promises, giving the other girl a look.
Mill nods even if she seems uncertain. "I won't."
"Thank you." He feels shy to say it. Hasn't genuinely said thank you to anyone in so long. No one does things for him – he doesn't understand why Ahsoka is. Maybe the younger Jedi are nicer than he thought considering that Mill is too. Maybe it changes as they get older. That seems typical.
"So that means you can tell me your name," Ahsoka realizes, brightening.
He hesitates.
Should he?
He doesn't have a problem with it but one of them could slip up. They're still young. Doesn't know what name to give them, either.
Sidious always called him Vader and he had Maul do the same. No one's called him his real name since Mom. "Anakin," he replies softly.
A group of younglings of more species than he's seen in his life come running over to them before either can reply. Anakin quickly pulls back from their mind, backing off a few steps as the children try to crowd around him. There's too many of them and if he needed to run he couldn't. He doesn't know how to deal with getting this much attention but – but... they're young. They won't hurt him.
He growls in minor annoyance when they all start trying to touch him though and daring each other about who can get close enough to touch him and then jump out of the way before he can turn towards them.
Which lasts until Ahsoka asks if he can give her a ride.
How could he say no to that?
He crouches to let her clamor onto his back, fists curling in his fur as she tries to balance herself. It hurts about as much as someone pulling his hair in human form from how tightly she's holding but he ignores it. Doesn't really mind having her this close, even if he's starting to wish all the others would stop touching him. He likes being touched – he's just not used to so many strangers doing it.
Mill's disappeared into the crowd of younglings. He thinks he saw her going off somewhere more alone to what looked like meditate. Seems like an odd thing for a five year old to want to do but he doesn't think much of it.
Anakin breaks into a sprint across the grass-covered ground. Ahsoka squeals as he runs, the air whipping past them. It's not wind and he kind of misses wind as silly as that is, but the air is still fresh in here.
Maybe this is actually the most fun day he's had since being brought to the Temple.
Of course that has to be the very moment Windu walks past right in front of them and Anakin jerks to a stop before he runs right into him. Ahsoka slides off his back, some of her glee disappearing.
She looks like she's frantically trying to come up with something to say and is failing badly.
"Come," Windu orders, gesturing for Anakin.
Great.
Exactly what he was hoping to avoid.
He throws a final glance at Ahsoka before reluctantly trotting after the Jedi Master and hoping he's not in trouble for something. He isn't very convinced of that.
Especially not when Windu leads him to a mostly unoccupied area of the Room of One Thousand Fountains. It's secluded enough by the trees on all sides that it looks like a good place for a murder or something.
Not that he thinks the Jedi would do that but he doesn't know.
So the last thing in the galaxy he's expecting is for the Jedi Master to throw a ball at him.
In all the – ?!
Running after the bright red ball – which has to be a younglings' toy – to catch it and then bring it back is a lot more fun than it probably ought to be.
He is totally mind-blown, though. Because seriously an adult is playing with him?
He seems to be studying him with the Force though and Anakin's not sure why but he's wary of it. He can't tell how sentient he is too, can he? Anakin tries to play about as stupid as he can... just in case.
Someone else approaching makes Anakin pause halfway back to Windu, the ball still in his mouth. It's... another adult, a human women with slightly darker skin who still looks pretty young.
"Playing fetch with a Sith hound, Master?" the woman asks dryly.
"I'm determining what he is, Depa," Windu says.
Oh.
So he is just doing this to study him.
At least he's not keeping him chained to study him. Which means something.
"I suppose that's why I heard you asking Master Plo what the best ways to appease canines were," Depa replies.
"We don't need it riled up again," he defends.
The familiarity of their interactions makes something ache inside of him. He can't say they seem overly attached to each other from the emotions he can sense but there's still a friendship there, a companionship that he no longer has with anyone, and he misses it desperately. He has a bit of something with Ahsoka but it's not the same when there's still so much about himself he has to hide.
Sides dictate that they have to be enemies, even if he doesn't want that. Doesn't know what he wants at all, actually.
He still wants to help people like he always has but what that even entails isn't half as clear as it was when he was young.
And he just – just wants to be happy. To... find peace. Doesn't think he's capable of knowing what that means again. Not when he has nothing and when he gets anyone, he's so terrified of losing them like he did with Maul and Mom.
"He seems pretty smart," Depa observes, drawing Anakin's attention back to the two Jedi.
"So he is. I think he's tamer than we first thought. I suspect he had a previous owner."
"You don't think it could be the Sith himself, whoever he is, do you?" she asks.
Anakin tries not to stiffen but it's hard not to. He drops the now drool-covered ball on the ground, watching them warily. They can't make him talk if they think he's a dog, but...
"We've considered that but the question remains, how would it have gotten to Coruscant?"
Anakin noses at the ball with his snout, running after it when it starts rolling, pretending to be a perfectly innocent, care-free puppy. They've really been thinking a lot about here he came from clearly and that's... not good.
If he accidentally led the Jedi to Sidious...
He doesn't want to think about what his former master would do to him. It would be far, far worse than the consequences he's already going to face for taking off like this in the first place. He doesn't want to think about it. Doesn't –
Ugh.
He can't let that happen.
"He has a strong connection to the Force," Windu goes on, "Which we suspect is how he understands so much of our intentions, but how far this goes, we couldn't say."
At least they don't know anything more than that. And Anakin will have to be sure they never find out.
**w**
Obi-Wan wasn't anticipating being gone for nearly two weeks but missions can take a long time. After he's given his report to the Council, he's told he doesn't need to keep constant watch on the wolf anymore.
Apparently, it's been allowed to roam free in the days he was gone and it hasn't hurt anyone yet.
That should be relieving to know because he doesn't have time to be a dog babysitter. So he doesn't know why he's slightly disappointed. Maybe he was starting to grow a little fond of the thing, after having it follow him everywhere for an entire week.
The next time he actually has the chance, Obi-Wan goes to the Room of One Thousand Fountains where the wolf is apparently spending most of its time. Trying to find it in such a large room is a bit harder, though.
Especially when he finally realizes that the tiny bit of blonde-colored fur sticking out from under the pile of younglings is the wolf. There's a five-year-old Zabrak leaning against the wolf's neck, which present has its head trapped on its paws because he doesn't think it would be able to move even if it tried. But it doesn't seem bothered.
The wolf's ears visibly twitch as Obi-Wan approaches. He's half a mind to just leave but then it starts to move. The younglings grumble in obvious discontent but slide off its back and paws just enough to let the wolf stand up.
The piercingness of its yellow eyes is uncanny sometimes. The way it's studying him looks so human for a moment as it trots up to him, waggling its tail.
Well.
That's a first.
It never comes this close to people willingly but it seems to have eased up a little in the time he was gone. Or maybe it's just that the wolf's been at the Temple for like three weeks now and it's starting to get used to it.
Obi-Wan steps closer, lightly patting its head. The wolf nuzzles against him, licking his hand.
"You're still free to move around even if I'm back now."
The wolf barks, looking at him inquisitively.
Almost like it's actually asking him something but he can't quite figure out what.
"I'll be around," he assures it.
There's no way he couldn't be, considering that it seems to have become the new Wolf of the Jedi.
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