Author's Notes: Hold onto your transistors, guys. This installment of "My Spark Still Shines" is going to get weird. I like how this chapter came out overall, but there wasn't enough room to put everything I wanted, so I'll have to save some of it for the next chapter. I don't want to rush the story elements, and the only way to keep good pacing was to break things up. Also, thank you all for over 44,000 views :)
Chapter 34
Be Kind Rewind
Many Vorns Ago…
Wheeljack was trapped in a cave with his commander, and the place was crawling with vicious Sharkticons. This planet had no name, but it was reputed to be a planet cursed by unfathomable creatures that kept the Sharkticons as their mindless slaves. Kup and Wheeljack soon found out that the tale was very true.
They had travelled to the planet with five other Wreckers, but now they were the only two left alive. Wheeljack chucked grenade after grenade at the massive maws of the bloodthirsty creatures while Kup repeatedly fired his plasma cannon. Once they got into the cave however they were no longer able to use explosives, so they had to rely on their swords and their wits.
"Wheeljack! Get to higher ground!" Kup yelled, his teeth somehow still able to hold onto the Cygar in his mouth, "They can't climb!"
Wheeljack nodded and together they clamoured up a broken stalagmite. The space barely fit the two of them at the flattened top, but they managed to keep their balance as they fought back-to-back against the jumping and snarling beasts below.
"We got ourselves into quite the mess, huh?" Wheeljack asked cavalierly.
"I guess so," Kup then barked a laugh, but it was without mirth, "I called HQ, but there were no available Wreckers left. My guess is they forgot all about us. You can't count on the higher-ups for help anyway, so I guess we're on our own."
"It's been an honor, sir," Wheeljack replied, a bit more solemn than before.
"Hey! We ain't dead yet!" Kup snapped while hacking at another Sharkticon, "Just keep cuttin' 'em down. We can do this."
Wheeljack nodded again, and with renewed vigor kept up the fight. Kup was the toughest son of a glitch Wheeljack had ever met, and if he thought they could get through this then they could. It would probably be added to Kup's ever-growing collection of Wrecker war stories.
While they were fighting off the unruly beasts, Wheeljack miscalculated one of his strikes and a rogue Sharkticon was able to grab his arm and drag him down below! Wheeljack covered his abdominal struts, knowing his face mask could protect his jaw. He was sure this was the end, but he wasn't going to give up until the very last intake.
Just as the Sharkticons were about to pounce on him and devour him however, suddenly all of them began to convulse and writhe violently on the ground. Wheeljack and Kup exchanged confused looks before Kup jumped down. While the Sharkicons were rolling around uncontrollably the two Wreckers culled each and every one of them.
When the commotion finally died down, a soft voice asked "Is it safe to come in now?"
The Wreckers looked at the entrance of the cave, and peeking its helm out from behind a rock was a tiny Cybertronian. At first the Wreckers feared a sparkling had found its way to the forbidden planet, but then after a moment they realized the features looked too old, and too...generic.
"Hey son, are you a symbiote?" Kup asked in a genial manner.
"Yes, sir," The yellow mech nodded, "I'm Rewind. My commanding officer and I came here after you called Prowl about needing backup."
"We needed warriors and they sent a pipsqueak?" Wheeljack asked sardonically, "Figures. So uh, what did you do to make the Sharkticons fritz out like that?"
"Sharkticons are very basic programs, not really alive in the typical sense," Rewind explained, "I just hacked the neural net of the queen and the rest fell along with her."
"Queen?" Kup asked, "Well I'll be fragged. You learn something new every orn. So, where's your host?"
"On Cybertron," Rewind replied, "I came here with my commander. He's outside fighting off Quintessons. Um, that's what the main inhabitants of this planet are called."
"Looks like we got ourselves an egghead," Wheeljack commented to Kup, "Lead the way, tiny."
"Um, it's Rewind, sir," Rewind reminded him before leading them out of the cave.
The little mech and the Wreckers walked for a quarter joor before they saw even a hint of light. Rewind didn't look back at them as he moved from one turn to the next. Wheeljack was surprised, given how fidgety most Autobots were about safety. Then he saw the reason for the blasé attitude poking out of Rewind's back. They were small and kind of looked like eight tiny needles sticking out, but Wheeljack knew what they were from his past experience as an engineer. They were motion sensors, designed for government hackers and spies. Rewind could probably locate them from mechano-miles away, and was likely able to find them in the first place thanks to those probably illegal devices.
When the trio made it outside, Wheeljack could see a red mech with two giant shoulder cannons shooting away at an absolutely enormous giant mech suit. It looked kind of creepy, as it looked Cybertronian but was obviously not alive. Inside was a strange creature with five rotating faces and tentacles coming out of the bottom of its capsule-shaped body.
"What in the pit?" Kup exclaimed, "Ain't never seen one of those."
"Fiddle scrap," Rewind whispered, and Wheeljack snorted in laughter at the inoffensive curse, "Commander Ironhide is running low on energon."
"He ain't bleeding," Kup remarked.
"I know, but I have an energon scanner in my right optic," Rewind explained, "He's at 35 percent. He won't last much longer if he doesn't fall back."
"Oh yes he will," Wheeljack replied as he hefted his sword once again, "You ready, Kup?"
"I was built ready!" Kup replied gamely.
"No, wait!" Rewind exclaimed worriedly, "We have more backup on the way if you just wait a moment!"
"Wreckers don't call for backup," Wheeljack told the little mech.
"They call for cleanup!" Kup finished for him.
Together the Wreckers rushed toward the battle and gave a deafening war cry. Ironhide saw who was coming and smirked, knowing this fight was about to get a lot easier. Wheeljack jumped up to the knee joint of the mech and then ran up to the helm to slice the wires clean off! Kup threw daggers at the hip struts to hinder mobility, and Ironhide shot at the legs to topple it over.
The mech suit stumbled and its owner tried to maintain balance. Wheeljack jumped off and ran away, and the other two knew that if Wheeljack ran it was advisable to follow him. The Quintesson didn't even have time to notice the grenade lodged in the suit's backside until it went off, and the whole thing blew up in a hail of shrapnel and smoke.
When they returned to where Rewind was standing Ironhide was huffing for air while the other two were leaning on each other so neither would fall over; exhausted from joors of combat.
"I coulda handled it," Ironhide groused, but his smile let them know he was joking.
"I'm sure you could've, old timer," Kup jabbed.
"Yer older than me," Ironhide reminded him.
"I know," Kup replied shamelessly.
"We need to get back to the ship, sir," Rewind told Ironhide, "You need energon."
"Ah, I'll be fine," Ironhide dismissed, "I ain't seen Kup in vorns. Wanna catch up."
"Why don't you join us in the Jackhammer?" Wheeljack offered, "We can down some high grade, swap some stories. Stuff like that."
"I'm not allowed to drink," Rewind told them, "Blaster says I'm a mean drunk."
"You do everything Blaster says?" Kup asked challengingly, "Come on, you ain't a newspark. Join in, let's party. It ain't often I see someone outside the Wreckers I can stand, and I ain't gonna waste the opportunity."
"Here here!" Ironhide agreed, "You know I woulda joined the Wreckers, but Optimus needs me to keep an optic on him."
The two Wreckers laughed at this statement and made their way to the Jackhammer. Rewind reluctantly joined them, and soon the lot of them were more cratered than a crashed seeker...
...Wheeljack awoke from his recharge inside the Jackhammer. The lights were still out and everything was dark. He rarely turned his lights on because that meant he would use less power and the 'Cons would have a harder time tracking him down. He would definitely need that level of stealth for his next mission.
He had been working on a spark monitor that wouldn't require a hub so that he could take it with him when he scouted energon mines. Even though the rest of Team Prime was angry at him for taking Miko with him to get revenge on Hardshell, Bulkhead had still been secretly texting him to let him know what was going on. They were still on the same team, after all.
At first Wheeljack hadn't believed the Vehicons were really former Autobots, but the longer this went on and the more Vehicons were located and identified, the more obvious it became that this was real.
That was what set Wheeljack off on his latest project. Many Wreckers' bodies were never located after their failed missions, and that led Wheeljack to believe that there were former Wreckers among Megatron's minions. Well, no way was ol' Buckethead going to use his friends and family as trophies. Wheeljack was going to get some vengeance and recover his comrades: Wrecker style.
Ever since he had started constructing the portable spark reader he had been having dreams about dead comrades. Kup was the most frequent among his dreams. He had been the only commander Wheeljack had ever respected, and on some level Wheeljack thought of him as the sire he never had. Kup's last known location was a planet called Gorr, where he had supposedly been buried in an avalanche made of pure energon. Well, Wheeljack didn't buy it.
This latest dream wasn't triggered by Kup however, but rather Ironhide. Bulkhead had sent Wheeljack a message saying to not come around the base because Arcee was very testy and dealing with a lot of grief. When Wheeljack asked why, Bulkhead gave him the grim news.
Megatron had killed Ironhide.
Most mechs outside the Wreckers were mechs Wheeljack didn't give two flying blips about. Only a few ever broke through Wheeljack's barriers. One was Ratchet, who was a competent medic who brought Bulkhead from the brink of death and didn't take scrap from anyone. Another was Ironhide, who had been one of Kup's oldest and dearest friends. Another was the third subject of his dream: Rewind.
Wheeljack remembered the fateful orn it was reported that Blaster and his two symbiotes had been captured and executed. It was devastating. Blaster was a cool enough mech, but it was the symbiotes that Wheeljack had really known and cared about.
Eject fit right in with the Wreckers. He was loud, fun loving, and full of grit. He could wreck with the best of them, and only remained a saboteur because that was what Blaster did, and symbiotes never left their hosts. Eject had even been the one to babysit for Bulkhead and Waterfall when they had their third sparkling.
Rewind on the other servo was very different. Wheeljack respected his skills, but they were never exactly friends. He had the nickname around the base of 'Too Kind Rewind', because he was polite to a fault. Wheeljack, who always spoke his mind, felt awkward around this well-behaved almost childlike symbiote that kept to himself and spent all of his free time working. It was like hanging around a Praxian sparkling, yet every now and then Rewind would say or do something to remind everyone he was in fact a grown mech.
Wheeljack still remembered the time the Wreckers showed up at base to party in Blaster's bunker. Everyone was getting wasted, with the typical exception of Rewind. Rewind was in the corner talking in low tones with a femme named Joyride. Finally Joyride got up, looking offended, and stormed off. Well now, Wheeljack's curiosity couldn't let this go unexplored.
"Hey Rewind, what was that about?" Wheeljack asked, sitting down with his high grade in hand.
"I asked Joyride how much high grade she had consumed," Rewind replied, his tone even and unaltered despite the loud music.
"What?" Wheeljack yelled over the noise.
Over the comm, Rewind said in his normal speaking voice /I asked Joyride how much high grade she had consumed. When I found out she was sober I asked her why she came to a party like this when she is carrying. She was upset because no one else knows she's carrying yet and she didn't want me to spoil the surprise./
/How'd you know she was expecting?/ Wheeljack asked.
/Because she threw up several times and she hasn't consumed as much high grade as usual,/ Rewind explained, /Joyride usually consumes 4.7 cubes of high grade at these parties./
/How do you know that?/ Wheeljack inquired.
/Because I...watch her,/ Rewind sheepishly replied, /I like her, but I know she would never date me. Her boyfriends average a height of 18.4 mechano-meters, while I only stand at 4.5 mechano-meters. Everyone treats me like a youngling, but I'm not. I'm just...weird. And short./
Wheeljack didn't have much advice for Rewind that night, or any other night for that matter. It was rare for symbiotes to have romantic spark bonds due to the fragmented nature of their sparks, but Wheeljack still felt sorry for the little guy. It didn't help that Rewind had all the personality of a calculator and the overly formal good manners of a Prime.
It was a motley friend group, to be sure, but Wheeljack wouldn't forsake any of them. He couldn't save Ironhide, but there were others he could try to find. Kup, Blaster and his symbiotes, Waterfall, Brawn, Huffer, Springer, and so many more. Wheeljack didn't care if he had to take his first Vehicon kicking and screaming and lock it into his cargo hold, he was going to find a way to fix them.
He snuck into the energon mine and hid behind some leftover gravel that had been piled up while excavating. He looked around, and saw that there were four servant class drones in the area. He turned on the new spark monitor and hoped that his latest gizmo worked.
He pointed the spark reader to the Vehicon pushing a minecart. The name read as Cueball. That name didn't ring a bell to Wheeljack, so he moved on. There was a Vehicon swinging a pickaxe. A crude means of mining, considering how combustible energon could be. Clearly Megatron didn't care if any of them died on the job. Wheeljack pointed the spark reader at this one, but the drone was further away so the readout took a moment.
Wheeljack waited anxiously for the results, only to see that the name was Burnout. Yet another name he didn't know. He shifted to the other side of the gravel pile and looked at the other two Vehicons. They were having a conversation and were standing close together, so getting a fix on just one of them would be tough. Wheeljack calibrated his device and hoped it could just pick up the one on the left for him.
The spark reader took a few tense moments to produce the readout, and when the screen popped up Wheeljack had to suppress a groan. It gave out two names. It couldn't tell which Vehicon was which.
The first name was Moonracer, which was a name that meant nothing to Wheeljack. The second name however was more than Wheeljack could have ever hoped for.
Springer.
One of those Vehicons was Springer, one of his Wrecker brothers! Springer had been one of the rare flight capable mechs that joined the Autobots during the war. He was a bit of a hothead, but he was fearless and would do anything for the Wreckers. Now he was a servant class drone, not even a warrior. Wheeljack knew Megatron likely did this to humiliate the mech that had sliced up his face during the Second Burning of Iacon. Well, Wheeljack couldn't let Springer languish in this pit. He was going to have to 'spring' Springer.
There was just one problem however. Wheeljack couldn't tell the difference between Springer and the one called Moonracer. He needed them to separate so he could read their sparks individually and grab only the one he wanted.
He waited for several minutes, but they just kept talking. They weren't even working, and Wheeljack couldn't help but smirk at the fact that Springer was so lazy while working for the Decepticons. Maybe there was still hope for him yet.
"Hey, you there!" A Vehicon from the second level shouted as he pointed down at Wheeljack, "Hey guys, an Autobot! Somebody stop him!"
Wheeljack bolted from his hiding place and readied a grenade from his side compartment. The servant class drones weren't trained in combat, so despite their guard's order most of them just ran away. Wheeljack ran after the two Vehicons he wanted, but they just ran faster to get away from him. He knew he would have to take them both, but snatching both of them away from the 'Cons was easier said than done.
Wheeljack saw the duo turn a corner, so he ran into the dark tunnel after them. He turned on his headlights so he could locate them in the darkness, but then off in the distance, he heard an explosion!
Raf was tinkering with his RC car in his room when he heard the familiar beep of Bumblebee's horn. He rushed to the window and saw his favorite yellow camaro sitting in front of his house.
"Rafael!" His mother shouted at him from the kitchen, "Your friend from the study group is here!"
"Thank you, Mama!" Raf shouted back, "I'll be home tonight."
"Your curfew is 9:00 PM, mister. Don't miss it!" His mother warned.
"I won't," Raf promised.
With those words Raf grabbed his laptop case and his RC car before booking it out the door. Bumblebee's passenger door opened for him, and Raf ran inside. The seatbelt buckled around him, and Bumblebee drove off at a languid pace.
"Are we needed at headquarters, Bee?" Raf asked.
[No. I just wanted to drive and thought you might like to come too,] Bumblebee explained.
"Oh, okay cool," Raf replied agreeably, "So where do you want to go?"
[Anywhere. I just don't want to go home yet,] Bumblebee replied with subdued beeps.
"Oh, well um, maybe we could drive around the dunes like Miko and Bulkhead sometimes do," Raf suggested, "Just, you know, don't do any stunt driving like Bulkhead does."
[Deal,] Bumblebee whirred.
For the first few minutes of the drive everything was quiet and relaxed. Bumblebee turned to some EDM on the radio, and Raf searched the web for any Autobot sightings he needed to scrub. When they got to the dunes Bumblebee turned off his radio and Raf looked out the window. It was sunset, and everything looked like a beautiful panorama of colors, with red and orange dominating the show.
"Wow," Raf breathed in awe, "No matter how many times I see it, it never stops being beautiful."
[Yeah,] Bumblebee agreed, [Earth is such a strange looking planet. I've never seen so much color in one place before, or so many different types of creatures.]
"Do the others like looking at this kind of stuff too?" Raf asked.
[Bluestreak seems to, and I know Jazz does,] Bumblebee replied, [Arcee does too, but she doesn't like to admit it.]
Bumblebee grew silent then, and Raf could tell that something was wrong. He thought he knew what it was too.
"Bee. I miss Ironhide too," Raf told him, "I know it must hurt, but time will heal this wound. You'll be left with more good memories of him than bad."
[I don't want to go home,] Bumblebee said, melancholy clear in his tone despite it being expressed in basic Cybertronian, [Chromia has been preoccupied with making sure our weapons are up to date, and Ratchet can't get her out of his medbay. Arcee is worse though. She hardly talks anymore. I've known Ironhide my entire life, and Arcee feels like family to me. I wish I could do more. I also wish...]
"Wish what?" Raf prodded.
[I wish I wasn't so jealous of her before,] Bumblebee confessed, [She had such an open and caring relationship with Ironhide. They told each other everything, and he always hugged her and played games with her and stuff. I could never have that kind of relationship with Optimus and Elita. I'm not even allowed to call him Sire. I just...I just keep thinking about what would happen if I lost Optimus, and all the things we've never said to each other.]
"Oh yeah. I forgot that Optimus was your sire," Raf replied apologetically, though Bumblebee wasn't sure why, "But, I mean, you two get along great, and he seems really proud of the progress you're making toward being a warrior."
[He is,] Bumblebee agreed, [The problem is that we can't really acknowledge each other as sire and son. If Megatron knew I meant that much to Optimus then he would use me against him. Optimus could never allow that. With Arcee every death she's experienced has become a scar she wears on her person forever. With me it's different though. Every loss is more like a keepsake I store in a box and don't take out unless I'm completely alone. Everyone has always looked at me as a source of hope. I'm the last sparkling from a living Cybertron. I'm the youngest Cybertronian alive, and until we win this war that will always be true.]
"Wow, you really are Optimus Prime's son," Raf remarked.
[What is that supposed to mean?] Bumblebee asked uncomprehendingly.
"It means you act like him, Bee," Raf explained, "Optimus keeps everything inside so that morale won't go down, and you do the same thing. I actually think you would make a good Prime someday."
[You think so?] Bumblebee asked.
"Sure," Raf replied with a smile, but then turned somber as he said, "I guess it also explains why we get along so well. I also know how it feels to keep everything bottled up and have no one to turn to to unburden the heaviness inside. I'm honored that you would talk to me about this, Bee."
[I don't know why you had trouble making friends before, Raf,] Bumblebee commented, [You're a great kid. You're smart, and you're fun, and you don't ask a lot of other people.]
"Yeah, but some earth kids tend to pick on the small and weak," Raf told him, "And it's not really just school. I live in a house with seven other people. There's my mama, my papa, my three sisters, and my two brothers. I love them, but...I don't always feel like I know them. You know what I mean?"
[Not really,] Bumblebee replied, [Do you not talk to them?]
"I do, but...I guess not enough. I don't know!" Raf replied in frustration at his own lack of ability to describe his feelings, "I guess what I mean is I care about them, but I'm afraid of getting attached. We've been together for three years, but having to move because of the Decepticons has shown me that everything can be taken away just like that. I'm afraid to know them now."
[Three years? Aren't you twelve?] Bumblebee asked in confusion.
"I'm adopted," Raf explained, "All of my siblings are adopted, except my sister Rosaria. My parents are well off, so they wanted to make their home available to as many children as they could. I met them shortly after I was picked up by CPS in Las Vegas. Well, truancy first. I was in a casino early in the morning but I didn't know what it was. I just liked the lights and the sounds."
[That doesn't sound like you at all,] Bumblebee commented, [You're always really observant. I never knew you were adopted though. I didn't think humans had an Allspark.]
"We don't," Raf corrected, "In earth culture, adoption is what happens when two people have a child, but they don't want the child. Then someone who does want a child takes them in and raises them as their own."
[Oh. That used to happen on Cybertron, but it was during the Golden Age. Long before I was born,] Bumblebee clarified, [By the time I came along there weren't many sparklings left. Many Autobots wanted one, but it was too dangerous to have them. Megatron killed Autobot sparklings because he knew they would be future soldiers for Optimus. Of course now that we know about the Vehicon conspiracy we know there could be sparklings among them. I know this is gonna sound weird, but I'm oddly excited about that. We could save some sparklings!]
"Speaking of Vehicons, have you noticed that Skywarp hasn't been in the base lately?" Raf asked.
[Not really. I just figured he was around,] Bumblebee replied nonchalantly, [Except for Bulkhead's parents the Vehicons all look the same anyway. How would we find Skywarp without looking for him?]
"Because he's Skywarp," Raf replied as if it should be obvious, "His loud mouth and tendency to get into trouble makes him stick out like a sore thumb. Besides, I can tell the Vehicons apart, and I haven't seen him in days. I just thought he was on a mission or something, but if you haven't seen him either..."
[He's missing,] Bumblebee finished; dread seeping into his fuel lines, [Oh, scrap! What if Skywarp rejoined the 'Cons? They might know where our base is!]
"Doubtful," Raf replied analytically, "Skywarp was too afraid of Megatron turning him back into a mindless slave. Trust me, no one wants that. If I were Skywarp and I wanted to disappear, I would change my vehicle mode to something more inconspicuous and go to a large population center. From there he would be able to blend in. The next step would be to establish a support system. In his case he would need energon, so he would need to locate either a mine or a ground bridge. The harbinger has a ground bridge, so if Skywarp knew about the Harbinger he would go there."
[Skywarp barely knows how to count to 20. I doubt he knew about classified Decepticon intel,] Bumblebee pointed out.
"True," Raf nodded in thought, "In cases of emergency gasoline can be used as an energon substitute, but it would have to be adulterated with crushed quartz, water, and battery acid, and then cooked at a temperature of exactly 78 degrees celcius. I don't think he has that level of knowledge, nor access to quartz."
[Um, bigger question, how do you know that?] Bumblebee asked skeptically, [Have you been testing out new ways to create synth en?]
"It's not a viable solution to the Autobot energon shortage," Raf elaborated, "The only way the gasoline mixture would work long-term is on a body that is really small, and every Autobot in the base is quite large. At best Skywarp could survive a few hours off of a supply the size of five energon cubes."
[That didn't answer my question, Raf,] Bumblebee replied, [How do you know about this? How did you test it?]
Raf's eyes grew big then, and he hugged his laptop. Bumblebee knew that look on Raf, and he didn't like it. Raf was scared. No, Raf was terrified.
[Raf? What's going on?] Bumblebee asked, [Listen, you can tell me. We're best friends, right? We've always been able to tell each other anything.]
"Not this," Raf whispered as he scrunched his eyes shut, "You can't know this. Nobody can know this. My life will be over."
[Raf, have the Decepticons found your new house?] Bumblebee asked worriedly, [If so we can just move you again. We could even move you and your family into the Autobot base. I know they don't know about us yet, but June Darby was able to handle it. What's a few more?]
"That's a terrible idea, Bee!" Raf suddenly exclaimed, "You just said you were afraid of Skywarp compromising the base. Well, you don't know that more humans wouldn't do the same!"
[Raf, calm down. You're freaking out on me, little buddy,] Bumblebee replied worriedly, [Look, why don't you just tell me what's wrong, okay? We can forget about the energon formula for now. Just don't shut me out. Not now. Not when we need each other more than ever.]
"Just answer me one question," Raf replied softly, "If it turns out Skywarp ran away, and you guys catch up with him, what will you do with him?"
[It depends,] Bumblebee replied cautiously, [If he's trying to return to the 'Cons, then we'll have to kill him. If he hasn't, then we'll lock him up back at base. We can't risk a Vehicon roaming free and potentially hurting natives.]
For reasons Bumblebee didn't yet know, this answer made Raf start to cry. Tears flowed down his face, and he hugged his laptop tighter. Bumblebee wondered if Skywarp had really become that close a friend to Raf, but he had a feeling that wasn't it. Something was very off, and Bumblebee had to know what it was. Raf was his best friend, and the only one on the entire planet who ever really understood him. Wait...
[Raf, how do you know basic Cybertronian?] Bumblebee asked, realization beginning to dawn on him.
"What?" Raf sniffed as he rubbed his eyes with his sleeve.
[You understand me, and I've never thought about it until now, but no one else does,] Bumblebee replied suspiciously, [I just thought it was because you were of higher intellect than others of your species, but you are literally the one only. Fowler doesn't understand my language, and neither does June. Neither do Jack or Miko.]
"Oh now that's not fair!" Raf suddenly snapped, "You're comparing me to Miko? I mean sure, she's cool and all, but she thinks strumming one note over and over again counts as knowing how to play the guitar! I know you're mad at me, but don't insult me!"
[Why do you understand me?] Bumblebee asked more insistently.
"Let me out!" Raf demanded despite them still being out in the desert, "Open this door right now!"
[Why are you acting so weird!?] Bumblebee yelled, [What have you done? Why are you so afraid? Just talk to me!]
"This isn't fair!" Raf cried out as he pushed his laptop over into Bumblebee's driver seat, "I haven't done anything wrong!"
[I never said you did,] Bumblebee replied, a little nervous at how volatile Raf's mood had become. He had never seen the boy like this before.
"I've done everything right!" Raf sobbed into his hands, "For three years I've done everything right. I've been perfect. Perfect grades, perfect grooming, perfect manners, everything. It isn't fair! How can trusting you for two minutes cost me my family? My future? Everything?"
[Raf, you can trust me,] Bumblebee assured him, [You haven't lost anything. Now tell me, who is threatening you?]
"You are! Don't you get it yet?" Raf shouted, "I'm a pretender!"
[A pretender?] Bumblebee asked, not understanding the term, [Is that some sort of human thing?]
"No Bee, it's some sort of Vehicon thing," Raf replied as he tried to calm himself down, "Remember Makeshift? The guy who disguised himself as Wheeljack?"
[Yeah...] Bumblebee replied, not liking where this was going.
"Well, he was a Vehicon that was experimented on by Shockwave," Raf recalled, "The experiment was called Project: Pretender. Megatron wanted soldiers that could turn into any life form so that they could sneak into the Autobot camps and slaughter them from within. Shockwave made dozens of us, but in the end only two were stable enough to be released from the lab. The others would either go insane, break down, or believe they actually were the subjects they were copying. We were named to separate us from the other Vehicons. One was Makeshift, and the other was me."
[You're a fake?] Bumblebee asked in shock, [Then where's the real Rafael? What did you do to my friend!?]
"Bee, there is no real Rafael," Raf bluntly told him, "Everything started going wrong once Makeshift and I were transferred to the Nemesis. We had both been on missions before without anything going wrong. I've impersonated a few Autobots in my time, and even a few Decepticons. I was good at my job, but I had no life outside of that. As a Vehicon I thought this was normal, but my viewpoint changed when Starscream brought us to earth.
"I was in vehicle mode scouting for Autobots when I found myself in Nevada. Everything was so glamorous, but I kept my focus on the mission. That all changed when I was speeding, and I almost ran over a tiny human. I stopped, mostly because I didn't want the coagulated fluid on my grill, and the little boy's mother ran to him and scooped him up in her arms. She cried, hugged him, kissed him, and told him everything was going to be alright. I don't know how to explain it, but...I wanted that. That connection. My whole life has been memorizing names and service records, learning code, and fixing things. I wanted someone to tell me that I was special. That I mattered. That they loved me."
[So you turned yourself into a human?] Bumblebee asked incredulously.
"Wouldn't you?" Raf asked shamelessly, "I noticed there was a discrepancy in what humans wanted their children to be and what most children really are. I didn't know which traits to adopt and which ones to forgo, so I just learned as I went along. I think I like the person I've become, though faking growth on height chart day is a little strenuous. Trying to only increase height by a fifth of an inch at a time is really hard. I'm...I'm sorry I never told you before, but I was afraid. When we found out the Vehicons might be Autobots that were brainwashed I was happy, because it means I might be too. Then I found out the memories of a painful death come with the transition, so I got scared again. My fears seemed justified when we found Skywarp, because it means I might still be a Decepticon after all. I don't know who I used to be, and honestly I don't care. I'm Rafael Jorge Gonzalez Esquivel, and that's all I ever want to be."
Bumblebee wasn't sure how to reply to that. His best friend for the past year was a fraud, but he still sounded like the same sincere person he had always been before. Bumblebee's best friend was a Vehicon, but he didn't seem intent on harming anyone. His human family was still alive, after all. There was still one thing Bumblebee couldn't ignore however.
[When we met, and I took you back to base, why did you go?] Bumblebee asked.
"Because you told me to," Raf replied simply.
[But...why?]
"I don't know. I guess I felt like I could trust you. It's strange, but I just got the feeling that you were a good person. You did save me during that first fight, and you've looked out for me ever since."
Bumblebee felt a little better with that answer. He remembered feeling the same way when they first met. That Raf was someone he could trust, someone who could even be his friend if given time. Perhaps they were both being naive.
"Bee, I trusted you then, and I have to ask if I can trust you now," Raf suddenly said, "Bee? Can we...keep this conversation between us? At least for now? I don't want my memories back, and I don't want Jack and Miko to think of me any differently."
[Fine. For now,] Bumblebee promised, much to Raf's relief, [So, um, what was your name as a Vehicon?]
"Refit," Raf shrugged, "But I like Raf better."