Hard Training.

Those were the words that Bones had used to describe the brutal, agonizing, death-defying ordeals even the military wouldn't inflict on their most hardened troops. Something Hadley felt comfortable proclaiming as he had been raised as a child soldier, he should be the expert on what was cruel and unusual training.

Bones made Hadley run through the forest at speeds that cars couldn't sustain. Hadley stumbled clumsily over fallen trees, rocks, roots, and natural potholes until he was too exhausted even to vomit. Passing out didn't excuse Hadley from his tasks either. Bones would simply keep dousing him in icy water until he came to again.

Oliver Wood would have adored Bones — sadistic bastards.

Hadley practiced throwing knives until his knuckles cracked and bled.

Bones' response to this?

To uncaringly toss Hadley some Neosporin and tell him not to get it on his palms or it would ruin his grip.

Bones' version of weight lifting? Hefting stone boulders repeatedly, gradually increasing their size and density. StairMaster? That would be climbing up the cave inclines with rocks strapped to his back. Hadley had never gone through so much muscle reliever or pain potions in his life.

After a week of being physically tortured into good shape by the evil vampire, Hadley threw off all of the man's artificial impediments and refused to go further, stating had he known Bones' intentions beforehand, Hadley would have gladly chosen death. Bones had just smiled at Hadley with his fangs extended and told him to prove it. Needless to say, Hadley just reapplied his outfittings and trudged wearily onward.

By far, though, the most grueling activity was up close with Bones. He stretched Hadley's limbs until tears poured down his face, chiding him all the while for his lack of flexibility. It wasn't Hadley's fault that the only popular sport in the wizarding world required very little flexibility.

Then during their hand-to-hand combat, Bones would knock Hadley into a state of unconsciousness that all of the icy water in the world couldn't revive. Hadley would wake up with the taste of Bones' blood in his mouth, just to repeat the procedure all over again. To say that Hadley fantasized about killing Bones every second of every day was an understatement. Yet, Hadley did get better, not like he had much of a choice since it was get better or die.

Hadley's first indication of his stamina increasing came after his second week of training. Bones and Hadley had been fighting hand-to-hand again, and this time Hadley didn't pass out. Bones still beat the ever-living shit out of him, but he had at least remained conscious. It was a mixed blessing. Hadley had his dignity from not going night-night in the middle of their battle, but now he was awake when Bones fed Hadley his 'healing' blood.

If only Voldemort could see him now.

"Disgusting," Hadley spat after being cajoled and then threatened into putting Bones' bloody finger in his mouth, yet again. "How can you live off that?"

The words had left his lips without forethought, as had many before them. Hermione would be disappointed in his continual lack of tact or emotional maturity.

"Necessity is the mother of all appetites. What you need in order to survive, you learn to love," Bones replied shortly.

Not a statement that Hadley could fully agree with, but he understood the sentiment behind it.

"All this blood better not turn me into a vampire. That was not our deal."

Hadley felt uncomfortable trying to argue with Bones' finger jammed inside his mouth, so he moved his head backward until the finger slid wetly out. The gesture was way too sexual for Hadley's comfort making him blush as soon as the thought flitted through his mind. Gods, this vampire made him feel unclean. Bones' had caught the flush, of course. No doubt the reason behind it as well, the vampire was sadistic, not stupid, but he just wiped his hand on his shirt.

"Trust me, luv, you aren't having nearly enough blood to turn you into a vampire. Since you fret about it all of the time, however, I'll tell you how it works. First, I'd have to drain you of all of your blood to the very point of death. There's a trick to that, taking enough blood without taking too much. Then, stuffed full of your blood, I'd open my artery for you and let you drink it right back out of me. All of it, and then some. There's a trick to that, too. You have to be strong to make other vampires, or your would-be protegee sucks you dry and kills you while he or she is changing. New vampires are harder to get off an artery than a starving babe off a juicy teat. These measly drops of blood I have been feeding you aren't doing more than healing your injuries. They're probably not even enough to enhance your strength. Now, will you stop griping every time you have to lick a few bits off of my pieces?"

That really caused Hadley to turn bright red at the visual that skipped across his subconscious due to Bones' lewd choice of words. Watching Hadley's face turn colors just made Bones run an aggravated hand through his hair.

"Now, that's another thing you have to stop doing. You turn red as a sunset at the slightest hint of innuendo. You need to be playing the part of an aggressive horny human! No vampire is going to believe that when they say boo and you faint from embarrassment. Your virginity's going to get you killed."

"I'm not a virgin," Hadley countered, eyes averted. From the corner of his eye, he could see Bones' dark brows rise up in disbelief. Prick. "Can we change the subject, please? We're not girlfriends at a slumber party. I don't want to be discussing this with you of all people."

"Well, well, well ," Bones drawled in a tone that would make any Slytherin proud, ignoring Hadley's plea. "Kitten's catted around, has he? The way you act, I'm surprised. Is someone waiting patiently for you to finish your training? Must be quite the human, to get you all hot and bothered. Again, didn't peg you for the experienced type, but then again, you did offer me a taste when we first met. Makes me wonder now if you planned on staking me before or after you got your itch scratched. What about the other vampires you killed? Did they die with a smile on their-"

Hadley slapped him or tried to, at least. Hadley had never had great control over his anger, but now he was seething, his brightly glowing green eyes lighting up Bones' face. Bones had caught Hadley's wrist and held it tightly, and then caught his other hand as he whipped his left palm toward Bones' cheek.

"Don't you dare talk to me that way, you bloody bastard. Since discovering my mother cheated on her husband and had me out of wedlock, my friend and cousin have never let me hear the end of how that made her a slut, and me, too, by default. My relatives told me every day of my childhood how the most useful I could ever be was if I sold my body, be that physically or sexually. The wizarding world is old-fashioned compared to the muggle world, they don't flaunt sex on every advertisement and street corner like it's nothing! I've only dated two people in my life, and I only had sex with one of them. He dropped me like a bad habit right afterward, so that was enough to cure me of any desire I had to duplicate the sexual escapades of muggles. Now, I mean it, I don't want to talk about this again!"

Hadley was panting in pent-up fury over the wound that Bones had unknowingly ripped open. He could feel his magic vibrating under his skin, eager to release his thinly reigned in anger. Bones released his wrists, and Hadley rubbed them where Bones' fingers had dug into his skin.

"Kitten," Bones began in a conciliatory tone, "I apologize. But just because your friends and family were ignorant and took their prejudice out on you, or some pimply-faced teenager pulled a one-nighter-"

"Stop it!" Hadley interrupted, breathing harshly. "Just stop it. I can do the job, I can fake sexy, whatever. But we are not discussing this."

"Look, luv-" Bones tried again.

"Bite me," Hadley snapped and walked off.

For once, Bones didn't offer to take Hadley up on the invitation, and he didn't follow him.

At the start of the fourth week, Bones announced they were going on a field trip. Of course, it wasn't an afternoon jaunt to the local museum. No, Bones had Hadley driving along a narrow road at midnight with no idea where they were headed. Bones had given Hadley the barest of directions- turn here, turn there, etc.- and it made Hadley nervous. They were in a very rural area, with no streetlights along the road. If a certain vampire wanted to suck someone's neck dry and then dump the body, this would be an ideal place to do so.

Then again, if Bones had wanted to suck Hadley's neck dry and dump his body, the cave was a pretty ideal place as well. Considering all the times he'd been unconscious after their training bouts, he could have dined on Hadley then if he had wanted to. Hadley wouldn't have been able to stop him. Hell, Hadley wouldn't have been able to stop him even when he was awake and not beaten into a pulp. Hadley had yet to win a single round against Bones, to his great dismay. He survived a deadly wizarding war, being shot with the killing curse, and random attempts on his life after the war had ended but a single master vampire was enough to defeat him repeatedly. Bones was so bloody strong and fast, fighting against him was like trying to put a leash on a lightning bolt.

"Turn left here," Bones said, jarring Hadley from his thoughts.

Hadley read the name on the sign. Peach Tree Road. It didn't look like the road actually led anywhere.

"You know, partner ," Hadley said as he made the turn, "you're being very secretive. When are you going to tell me what this field trip is about? I take it you didn't just get a sudden urge to go cow-tipping in the middle of the night."

Bones snorted. "No, can't say that I did. I need some information from a man who lives out here." The way Bones said that made it sound like whoever this person was wasn't going to be happy to see him.

"Look, I refuse to be a part of killing any muggles, so if you think you're going to interrogate this guy and then bury him, you can count me out."

Hadley expected Bones to challenge him or get angry, but instead, the demented vampire started to laugh. Rude.

"I'm serious!" Hadley said, stomping on the brakes for emphasis. A small Sirius-like voice in the back of his head also had to butt in with - "No, I'm Sirius!" - that just sent a small shot of pain through his heart, that he quickly shook off so he could focus on Bones.

"You'll get the joke soon enough, luv," Bones replied. "You never did explain what 'muggle' meant to me, since you throw that term around so liberally. But let me set your mind at ease since I can probably extrapolate the meaning behind your words with context clues. For one, I promise not to lay a single hand on the fellow, and for another, you'll be the one talking to him."

That surprised Hadley. He hadn't even realized he had been using the word in front of the vampire. He was good at blending in with the muggles, having grown up around them and in that world, but he guessed that the wizarding world had rubbed off on him enough to make him forget to watch his words. Wait… he was going to be the one questioning whoever they were going to see? Hadley didn't even know who the guy was, let alone what questions to ask. What was Bones up to?

Bones' perfectly sculpted eyebrow arched at Hadley. "Will we be driving again anytime soon?"

Oh. Hadley let off the brake and hit the gas, jolting the truck forward. "Do I get any more details than that? Like, some background on him and what you know?"

"Will you tell me what exactly a muggle is?"

Hadley rolled his eyes, persistent bugger. "A muggle is a non-magical person, I think the Americans actually call them no-majs, short for no magic."

Bones hummed thoughtfully, but Hadley couldn't tell what he was thinking. "Winston Gallagher was a railway worker back in the sixties. He also had a side business of making moonshine. One day, a fellow bought one of Winston's products and then was found dead with it the next day. Winston might have mistaken the alcohol content for that batch, or the sot drank too much. Either way, it all ended the same. Winston was found guilty of murder and condemned to die."

"That's outrageous!" Hadley exclaimed. "With no motive or proof of malice aforethought?"

"'Fraid the judge, John Simms, wasn't big on the idea of innocent until proven guilty. He also doubled as the executioner. Right before Simms hanged him, however, Winston swore he'd never let Simms have another night's peace. And since that day, he never had."

"He hung him? That bastard! Reminds me way too much of the justice system in the British Ministry of Magic. Wait… the man you want me to speak to was hung?"

"Pull over at that no trespassing sign, Kitten," Bones directed. Hadley did, still processing Bones' story. "Winston won't speak to me, since our kinds don't get along. He'll talk to you, though. But I warn you, he's about as cheerful as you currently are."

"What part of this am I not understanding?" Hadley's tone could only be described as waspish. "Did you not just say that that judge hung him?"

"Swung him right from the tree jutting over that cliff," Bones affirmed. "If you look, you can still see rope marks on the bark. A good many people lost their lives on that wood, but don't bother speaking to any one of them. They're residual. Winston's not."

Hadley blinked twice, before understanding filled him. "Winston is a ghost."

"Ghost, specter, phantom, take your pick. What's most important is he's sentient, and that's rare. Most spooks are only replays of their former selves. Not able to interact, just doing the same thing over and over, like a record stuck on a turntable. Blimey, I'm dating myself; no one uses records anymore. The point is, Winston was so mad when he died, that part of his consciousness stayed on. It's also due to location. Ohio has a thinner membrane for separating the natural from the supernatural, so it's easier for a soul to stay behind instead of crossing over. This particular area is like a homing beacon. Five cemeteries forming a pentagram - really, what were they thinking? It's a road map for spirits, is what it is. Thanks to your bloodline, you should be able to see them, whereas most humans can't. Although I know nothing about if your magic blood helps or hinders in that matter. You should be able to feel them by now. Their energy's like a voltage in the air."

Of all the things Hadley had expected from today, a lesson in ghosts from a muggle vampire was definitely not even in the top ten. "Uh, I know about ghosts. Sentient ghosts are very common in the Wizarding world. Residual ghosts are usually muggles that died in magically high areas, like here or wizards that died in a 'dead zone' or an area that has been sucked dry of all natural magic. My school actually had hundreds of sentient ghosts since Hogwarts was built over several intersecting ley lines, or spook highways if you prefer. What kind of information could a vampire like you want from a ghost?"

"Names," Bones said succinctly, neatly sidestepping Hadley's little reveal of information. "I want Winston to give you the names of any young girls that have recently died around these parts. Don't let him tell you he doesn't know either- and I'm only interested in deaths by unnatural causes. No car accidents or diseases."

Bones didn't look like he was kidding, but Hadley was confused. "Is this some kind of a joke?"

Bones made a noise that was almost a sigh. "I wish it were, but it isn't. I would ask him myself, but as previously mentioned, our kinds do not get along."

"I have never heard of ghosts disliking vampires before. Why do you not get along?"

"They're jealous since we're as dead as they are, but we can do as we please while they are forever stuck as a hazy apparition. Makes them right cranky most of the time, so I would recommend you not mention your half-vampire status, which reminds me…" Bones then reached down and picked a bottle of something clear that he then handed to Hadley. "Take this. You'll need it."

Hadley held it up to the light and swished the liquid around. It looked like water, but having been a wizard long enough he knew that looks were often deceiving. "What's this? Ghost cat nip?"

Bones laughed. "For Winston it is. That's white lightning. Pure moonshine, luv. Simms Cemetery is right past that line of trees, and you might have to bang about a bit to get Winston's attention. He tends to nap frequently, but once you've got him up, be sure to show him that bottle. He'll tell you whatever you want to know."

"Let me get this straight. You want me to go stomping through a graveyard while brandishing a bottle of illegal booze to rouse a cranky spirit so that I can interrogate him about dead girls?" How was this Hadley's life?

"That's it. And don't forget this. Pen and paper. Make sure to write down the names and ages of every girl Winston tells you about. If he can include how they died as well, so much the better."

"I should refuse," Hadley muttered. "Because interrogating a ghost was not part of our agreement."

"If I'm right, this information will lead to a group of vampires, and hunting vampires is part of our agreement."

Hadley just rolled his eyes, grabbing the pen, small spiral notebook, and the bottle of illegal liquor from Bones before hopping out of his truck. The undead was making him go wake up the actual dead to have a friendly little chat. This just reiterated that Hadley was pants at divination because if someone had told him four weeks ago that this was what he would be doing, he would have never believed it. Although with how his luck is, he probably wouldn't have been surprised.

Simms Cemetery at midnight wasn't a soothing place. The only other cemetery that Hadley had admittedly been in was the one in Godric's Hollow where his parents were buried. That cemetery had been peaceful, idyllic even. Simms Cemetery on the other hand had been hidden from the road by thick bushes, trees, and that rocky cliff. True to Bones' description, a tree still protruded over the precipice, and there was also a large evergreen amid the dilapidated headstones. Seeing some of the dates clarified Bones' earlier comment about Winston being a railway worker in the sixties. He'd meant the 1860s, not this past century.

A figure suddenly appeared behind Hadley, making him jump with a startled shout, his hand whipping out his wand automatically.

"Are you alright?" Bones immediately called out. The vampire was waiting out of sight beyond the cemetery, with the explanation that none of the dead dead would see him. The thought of vampires and ghosts not getting along was just too funny. Even in the afterlife, prejudice still existed.

"Yeah…" Hadley said after a beat to catch his breath and calm his war-honed responses. "It was nothing."

A hooded, shadowy form swept past Hadley, floating a few inches above the cold earth. It went to the edge of the cliff and then disappeared with a faint sound, like a whispered scream. Hadley watched in fascination as moments later the shadowy figure returned out of nowhere and walked the same path, culminating in another ghostly wail.

To Hadley's left, the indistinct outline of a woman was bent over another headstone, sobbing. Her clothing wasn't from this era, from the hazy glimpses that Hadley could catch of it, and then she too faded into nothingness. For a minute Hadley waited, and then her outline faded into view again. Soft, almost inaudible cries came from her until they, and she too vanished once more.

A record stuck on a turntable, Hadley observed with amusement. How accurate. It was fascinating to see the residual ghosts. Hadley had heard of them, but with the wizarding world so flooded with magic, he had never been able to observe a real residual ghost before. He wished he could tell Hermione about it.

In the corner of the cemetery, there was a headstone with barely visible etched letters, but he could make out a w and a t in the first name, while the last one started with what looked to possibly be either a g or a p. Time to take his chances.

"Winston Gallagher!" Hadley called out, rapping on the frigid stone for emphasis. "Come on out!"

Nothing.

A breeze made Hadley cast a wandless, wordless heating charm on himself since he had forgotten to bring a jacket with him for this little field trip. He shuffled his feet and waited awkwardly.

"Knock, knock! Who's there?" Hadley said next, driven to absurdity by what he was doing.

Something moved at the edge of the trees behind him. Not the cloaked phantom, who was still traveling the same unaltered path, but almost a fuzzy shadow. Maybe it was just the bushes rustling in the wind. Hadley returned his attention to the grave at his feet.

"Oh, Winsssttonnnnn…" Hadley cooed, fingering the bottle in his hands. "I've got something for you!"

"Cursed, insolent warm baggage," a voice slithered on the air. "Let's see how fast it can run."

Hadley stiffened. That didn't sound like any person he had heard before. The air in Hadley's vicinity got colder all at once as Hadley turned slowly toward the sound of that creepy voice. The shadow he'd previously observed stretched and changed, taking form, revealing a male in his fifties with a barrellike belly, squinting eyes, brown hair overrun with gray, and untrimmed whiskers.

"Hear that, do you?" Another odd keening came out of him, eerily echoing. He shimmered for a second, and then the leaves where he hovered scattered in a burst of concentrated air.

So a ghost that was nearly a poltergeist, wonderful.

"Winston Gallagher?" Hadley asked.

The ghost actually looked over his shoulder, as if expecting someone behind him.

Hadley raised an eyebrow, putting on his most unimpressed 'Molly Weasley' look. " Well ?"

"He can't see me…" the ghost presumably muttered to himself.

"The hell I can't!" Hadley marched over in relief, eager to get out of this cemetery as soon as possible. "Is that your headstone? If the answer's yes, then tonight is your lucky night."

Those squinty eyes narrowed further. "You can see me?"

Hadley rolled his eyes. Was he this thick when he was alive? Hadley couldn't help but wonder. "Yeah, I see dead people. Who knew? Now let's talk. I'm looking for some newly deceased, and I heard you were the one who could give me the information I need."

It was almost funny to watch those transparent features change from incredulity to belligerence. His expression reminded Hadley of Uncle Vernon's any time Hadley had ever opened his mouth to speak.

"Get out of here or else the grave will swallow you whole and you'll never leave !"

Boy, if Hadley hadn't been threatened every couple of months by way scarier people, he would be impressed by how intimidating he sounded.

"I'm not afraid of the grave; I was born half in it. But if you want me to get out of here-" Hadley turned as if to leave, " - fine, but that means I'll just have to throw this in the nearest trash can."

Lifting his hand up, the clear bottle glinted in the moonlight. Hadley almost laughed when the ghost's eyes fastened on the bottle as though they were magically welded. This had to be Winston, all right.

"Whattt'sss that you got there mister?" Winston drew the first word out in a lustful hiss or a horrible imitation of Parseltongue.

Hadley popped the cork, waving it under where his nose appeared to be. "This? Just a little moonshine, my friend."

Hadley wasn't sure how Bones expected him to bribe Winston with the bottle of moonshine. When he had gone to Nick's death day party, there had been food, rotted though it may have been, but none of the ghosts ever picked anything up to eat. Maybe the smell was enough? Was he supposed to pour some on Winston's grave? Hold the bottle inside of his disembodied form? Splash him with it?

Winston made another keening noise that made Hadley's nose wrinkle in both disgust and discomfort.

"Please, mister!" Gone was Winston's hostile tone, replaced instead with one of desperation. "Please, drink it. Drink it!"

"Me?" Hadley gaped. "I don't want any!"

"Oh, let me taste it through you, please!" he begged

Taste it through me… Oh. Now Hadley knew why Nick had invited them to his party. And why Bones hadn't mentioned how to entice Winston before. Hadley gave the ghost an irritable look while promising himself revenge on a certain pale-skinned, room-temperature creature of the night.

"Fine. I'll drink some, but then you are going to give me names of young girls who've died around here. No car accidents or diseases either. Murders only."

"Read the paper, mister, why do you need me for that?" he barked. "Now drink the 'shine!"

Hadley was not in the mood to be pushed around by yet another dead person. Fuck that. "Guess I've caught you on a bad night," Hadley said in his most pleasant voice that Ron used to call his 'Saviour of the Wizarding World' voice. "I'll just leave you alone and be on my way…"

"Samantha King, seventeen years old, passed last night after being bled to death!" Winston suddenly trumpeted. "Please!"

Hadley hadn't even had to ask for Winston to specify a cause of death. The desperation of the ghost for the liquor was disturbing to witness. Hadley wrote down the information and then tipped the bottle back to take a large swig.

"Oh, Merlin!" Hadley wheezed. Hadley was no stranger to alcohol and with his increased metabolism as a part-vampire usually only Wizarding alcohol was strong enough to even get him slightly buzzed. He barely noticed Winston's entire form diving through his throat like he'd been shot from a muggle gun."That tastes like kerosene! What the bloody hell!"

"Oh, the sweetness!" Was Winston's enraptured reply as he came out the other side of Hadley's neck. "Yesss! Give me more!"

Hadley was busy trying not to gag on the horrendous flavor of homemade moonshine. His throat burned in a way it never had before when drinking alcohol.

"Another name." Hadley managed to get out. "Then I'll have more."

Winston didn't need to be told twice any longer. "Violet Perkins, age twenty-two, died last Thursday of strangulation. Cried the whole way up." He didn't sound particularly sad for the poor girl. A hand waved impatiently at Hadley, its edges blurry. "Go on!"

One deep breath later, more moonshine went down the hatch. Hadley just coughed harder, his eyes watering. What the hell was in moonshine?

"Why would anyone pay for this swill?" Hadley gasped out. His throat was almost throbbing when Winston exited it and he floated back in front of Hadley.

"Thought you'd taken my 'shine from me forever, didn't you Simms?!" Winston shouted at the passing hooded phantom, it of course didn't react. "Well, look who's drinking while you're condemned to eternally wander off that cliff! This nip's for you old John! Carmen Johnson, twenty-seven, bled to death ten days ago. Drink mister! And this time swallow like man, not a gurgling babe!"

Hadley regarded the ghost with disgusted amazement. Out of all things, liquor seemed to be what the dead man had missed the most. "You're dead and you're still an alcoholic. That's so bloody dysfunctional"

"A bargain's a bargain!" He belted. "Drink!"

"Prick," Hadley muttered under his breath as he eyed the bottle unhappily. If he threw up after this, he knew it would come back up just as bad as it had gone down. This stuff made firewhiskey taste like sugar water in comparison. He swore to himself to at the very least prank the shit out of Bones. He may not be able to kill the bastard, but he wasn't the son of the marauders for no reason.

Twenty minutes later, Hadley's notepad had thirteen more names on it, the bottle was empty, and Hadley was swaying on his feet. If he wasn't so dizzy, he'd be horrified at all of the girls who'd been murdered the past couple of months. Hadn't the new governor just been bragging on the telly about how the crime rate was way down? The names on Hadley's list sure seemed to suggest otherwise.

Winston lay on the ground, his hands over his belly, and when Hadley let out an extended burp, Winston smiled pleased.

"Ah mister, you're an angel. Sure there's not a drop left? I might have remembered one more person…"

"Feck off!" Hadley grumbled, rubbing his nauseous stomach. "It's bloody empty. You should tell me the name anyway you twat, especially after making me drink that entire bottle of bloody sewage."

Winston gave Hadley a devious smile. "Come back with a full bottle and I will."

"Selfish spook bastard," Hadley mumbled as he staggered away from a laughing Winston.

Hadley had made it a few feet away when he felt that distinct pins and needles sensation again, only this time it wasn't in his throat.

"Hey!"

Hadley looked down in time to see Winston's grinning, transparent form fly out of his pants. He was chuckling even as Hadley began to curse him out.

"Drunken filthy pig!" he spat. "Bloody bastard!"

"And a good eve'in' to you too mister!" Winston called out, his edges starting to blur and fade. "Come back soon!"

"I hope flobberworms shit on your corpse!" Hadley shouted, feeling rather violated. A ghost had just gotten to third base with him. What the actual fuck?

Bones came out from behind the bushes about fifty yards away. "What happened Kitten?"

"You! You tricked me! I never want to see you or that bottle of bloody liquid arsenic again!" Hadley then made the poor decision to throw the empty bottle of moonshine at Bones' head. Or…at least he tried to. It missed him by a dozen or so feet.

Bones picked up the empty bottle in astonishment. "You drank the whole bloody thing? You were only supposed to have a few sips!"

"Did you say that? Did you?!" Bones reached Hadley just as he felt the earth tip sideways. "Didn't say anything! I've got those names though. So that's all that matters. But why is everyone disgusting?! Alive, dead, undead - all perverts! I had a drunken pervert in my pants! Do you know how unsanitary that is?!"

Bones held Hadley upright. He would have protested, but he was finding speaking difficult. "What are you saying?"

"Winston poltergeisted my privates, that's what!" Hadley announced in a hysterical wail.

"Why, you scurvy, lecherous spook!" Bones yelled in the direction of the cemetery. "If my pipes still worked, I'd go right back there and piss on your grave!"

Hadley could have sworn he heard faint laughter, but that could have been the wind.

"Forget it." Hadley tugged on Bones' jacket, leaning heavily against him for fear of falling over and losing what was left of his dignity. "Who were those girls? You were right, most of them had been killed by vampires."

"I suspected as much."

"Do you know who did it?" Hadley slurred. "Winston didn't know. He just knew who they were and how they died."

"Don't ask me anymore about it, because I won't tell you, and before you even wonder, no, I had nothing to do with it."

The moonlight shining down made Bones' skin even creamier. He was staring off into the distance, and with his jaw clenched, he looked both fierce and very beautiful.

"I don't think that you hurt those girls." Suddenly a giggle escaped from Hadley's mouth. "You know what? You're pretty. You're so pretty."

Bones finally glanced back at Hadley. "Bloody hell. You'll hate yourself in the morning for saying that. You must be absolutely pissed."

Another giggle escaped Hadley, Bones was funny. "Not anymore!" Hadley singsonged.

"Right…" Bones then picked Hadley up. The leaves made small crunching noises under Bones' feet as he carried Hadley effortlessly. "If you weren't half dead, what you just drank would have killed you. Come on pet. Let's get you home."

"Wouldn't be the first time I have escaped death," Hadley mumbled contentedly. It had been a long time since he had been held like this. Sure, Bones may have carried Hadley when he had been beaten unconscious, but that was different. Now Hadley was extremely aware of Bones' hard chest pressed against him, how effortlessly Bones held him, and even how good he smelled. It wasn't cologne - he had never worn any to Hadley's knowledge. It was a clean scent that was uniquely his and it was … intoxicating.

"Do you think I'm pretty?" Hadley heard himself ask.

Something flashed across Bones' face, but it was gone too quickly for Hadley to guess what it was. "No… I don't think you're pretty. I think you are the most beautiful man I've ever seen."

"Liar," Hadley breathed. "He wouldn't have done that if I was. He wouldn't have been with her ."

"Who?"

Hadley ignored Bones' question, too caught up in the memory. "Maybe he knew. Maybe on some deep, deep level, he could sense I was evil. I wish I hadn't been born at all. So many people would still be alive if I hadn't been born."

"You listen to me, Kitten," Bones cut Hadley off mid-rant. "I don't know who or what you're talking about, but you are not evil. Not one single cell of you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, and sod anyone who cannot see that for themselves."

Hadley's head lolled onto Bones' arm. After a minute of tense silence, Hadley's depressing thoughts seemed to vanish as he started to giggle again.

"Winston liked me. As long as I have moonshine, I've always got a date with a ghost!"

"I hate to inform you, luv, but you and Winston don't have a future together."

"Says who?!" Hadley pouted but then laughed when he noticed the trees were tilted sideways. That was weird. And then they seemed to start spinning as well.

Bones lifted Hadley's head up making him blink in surprise. The trees were straight again! Then all of a sudden all Hadley could see was Bones' face as the vampire leaned in close to Hadley.

"I say."

Bones seemed to be spinning also. Maybe everything was spinning. It felt that way.

"I'm drunk, aren't I?"

Bones snorted, it tickled Hadley's face. "Impressively so."

"Don't you dare try to bite me!" Hadley said, just now noticing how close Bones' mouth was to his own neck.

"Don't fret. That was the furthest thing from my mind."

Hadley's truck then thankfully came into view. Bones carried Hadley to the passenger side and deposited him onto the seat. Hadley slumped down, tired all of a sudden.

The door shut and what felt like seconds later the engine then vibrated to life. Hadley kept shifting, trying to get comfortable in the cramped passenger seat, but Hadley's truck didn't have an extended cab and the interior was annoyingly small. Maybe he could add some expansion charms to the inside without the engine blowing up?

"Here," Bones said after several minutes of just watching Hadley shuffle around uncomfortably and then pulled his head down onto the vampire's lap.

Bones' leg was cool to the touch, which felt amazing on Hadley's feverish skin. He didn't want the vampire to be getting any ideas, but Hadley was too comfortable to put up a fight, so he melted into Bones' lap, closing his eyes.

"Wake me when we get to my house." He muttered and then darkness claimed his spinning mind.