Payback
"This is a complete waste of my evil genius talent!" snapped Drakken as he mixed chemicals. "Do you know what I could be doing right now? Working on my Shrink Ray 2.0!"
"2.0? It hasn't even been finished yet, you can't redo what hasn't been done," scoffed Shego as she sat on his desk while he worked. "You're the one who made a big deal about not going to Paris because you were tired."
"You could have gone without me," snapped Drakken as tinkered with the Bunsen burner.
"Just finish making my new lipstick," said Shego. It was silent, and then, "Why did you take a shower in sanitizer?"
"I said I don't want to talk about it!" snapped Drakken. He glared. "You're lucky I'm making this for you after the stunt you pulled."
"Don't touch my stuff," said Shego casually. He stared at her. "What?"
"It was a nearly empty lipstick; I hardly think that warrants the mental scarring I endured. Let alone all the bruises." He indicated to his eye, hand, and knee. "I don't make a big deal about you taking my stuff."
"I don't..." she trailed off and seemed to be mentally counting down. Drakken waited. "You may have a point."
"Thought so," said Drakken. "I want an apology."
"...Okay." Shego rolled her eyes and looked at the clock. "Listen, hurry this up would you, I have to leave in an hour."
"Shego, you overreacted and I want an apology," said Drakken, his arms crossed, "or I'm not finishing."
"Excuse me?" snapped Shego. Her eyes narrowed. Drakken sighed and sat back down.
"Fine, don't apologize," muttered Drakken. As Shego headed out of the room an idea struck him, and an evil smirk crossed his face.
Drakken relaxed in his chair, a large bowl of popcorn in his lap as he watched a movie. He had decided to ditch karaoke that night, as he was tired from the previous night and making makeup. Though if it worked out, they could turn a nice small profit for their evil plans to take over the world. Mind control eye-shadow? Drakken smirked to himself, then shrugged... Shampoo? He filed it into the later plans in his head.
He heard the lair door slam loudly, and the sound of the henchmen in the downstairs kitchen scatter. Drakken felt a rush of sheer euphoria hit him, before the sudden panic that he was in his pajamas and armed with only popcorn. He should have thought this through. He shook off his nerves as the door flew open with a green blast. He had the sudden urge to dash behind his chair for cover, but his smugness made him turn his chair around to face her. Shego stood in a leggy black dress and neon green heels, one of which was broken. Her normally thick waves were a wiry disaster and she was covered in something shiny like water or oil. Her eye was twitching, her lips a smudged black mess, and when she spoke only the side of her lip moved.
"Drakken!" she yelled, as loud as she could. "What the hell?"
"Did you have a nice date?" asked Drakken, taking a bite of popcorn.
"Did I... Are you serious... What did you do?" asked Shego, pointing to her lips.
"I see the date must have gone well, what with your 'shocking' look." Drakken bit another piece of popcorn as henchmen gathered in the doorway.
"You think it's funny?!" she asked. The fact her lips barely moved was humorous to Drakken, but he shrugged. "I did have a nice time for once. Thanks for asking. Until this! He went to kiss me and we were electrocuted...stop laughing!"
"That's all?" asked Drakken. The henchmen sat with popcorn of their own in the doorway.
"This! This!" she held up the lipstick tube, covered in black tar. "Last I saw my date he was covered in this tar oil and running down main street."
"Poor tar-covered gorilla." Drakken shook his head and fought the laugh at the scene in his head. "It washes off, he'll be fine."
"I don't care if he's fine, what the hell is this?" asked Shego, pointing to her face. "It won't stop shocking me every time I move my lips."
"Is that why you're practicing ventriloquism? I thought they were tarred together," said Drakken. He felt a little concerned now. "Have you tried wiping it off?"
"Are you..." she indicated to the mess on her face. "What do you think!?"
"Maybe you're a messy kisser, I don't know," said Drakken. He dodged a purse swinging at him. "Hey! Aw, my popcorn."
"Your popcorn—ow!" She jolted as she moved her lips, small sparks surging. "Make this stop, now!"
"Have you tried a makeup wipe, the oil...why are you covered in oil?" asked Drakken with a raised brow. She held up an empty bottle of makeup oil, "Oh. You travel with that?"
"Drakken..." she growled. He sighed and smirked.
"You see Shego, now your actions earlier would have been warranted by this," said Drakken casually as he stood. "If I had taken your lipstick and done this, then that little ruse of yours would have been good payback."
"What twisted logic is this," said Shego. "Is this because I didn't apologize? This is...this is..."
"Insane, psychotic, mad?" smirked Drakken as he handed her another lipstick. "It should have worn off on its own, but this should deactivate the ingredients."
"Yes, all those things," her face was expressionless, and then she smirked. "Can you make more? In a different color?"
"Can I make...well yes," said Drakken with a raised brow as Shego looked at the clear lipstick he'd given her.
"I have an idea. Possible has a date next weekend and it would be a real shame if her lip gloss gets replaced," smirked Shego deviously, her eyes narrowing. She looked at the clear lipstick and pulled out what remained of her contaminated black one. "Do me a favor next time you decide to be devious."
"What's that?" asked Drakken as he sat back down in his seat and Shego put something on her lips.
"Don't try it on me," glared Shego. And with that, electricity surged through him as she kissed him angrily. "'Night, Dr. D."
"Ow," Drakken twitched in pain on the floor as Shego applied the clear lipstick to her lips and walked to her room. "'Night."
Muah! →