***As much as I adore the four boys, there seems to be a lot of fanfiction/headcanons out there that are like "the Marauders plus Lily," and I refuse to accept that Lily didn't have her own close friends from school. I love getting to write sections about Lily and her mates. Also, you may have gathered this from the last chapter, but MY Alastor is A LOT more Scottish.

From the playlist:

Crazy Little Thing Called Love - Queen (continued)

Everything I Own - Bread

Never Going Back Again - Fleetwood Mac (continues into next chapter)

Ch. 17 - Honeymoony

All five landed in Godric's Hollow within the hour, touching down outside the Potter's house and quickly heading inside the front gate. A light turned on in the bedroom upstairs after Alastor banged loudly on the door. When it opened, the first thing they saw was James's wand.

"It's Alastor Moody, and you've got a dent on the back of your skull from the first day I had you in training."

Clad only in flannel pajama bottoms, James opened the door and let them all in. "What happened?"

Emmeline shuffled past him. "Merlin's sake, put a shirt on, Potter."

"Bite me, Vance."

"I think Lily beat me to the punch, dear."

"Not that I'm not happy to see you all, but I don't remember inviting you over for a midnight snack." Once James closed the door behind them, Remus headed straight for the freezer.

"Don't register your new address with the Records Department at the Ministry," Alastor said on his way into the front room.

James furrowed his brow. "Beg your pardon?"

"Dinnae register. Your new address. With the Ministry." Moody plopped himself in the armchair he seemed to prefer and removed his prosthetic leg.

"...That was so pressing that it couldn't've waited 'till morning?"

Alastor ignored this, as he didn't believe in waiting for an "opportune time" if there was something he had to do. "Somebody get me some parchment and a quill. I've got to get an owl to Albus."

"It's alright love, you can come down," James called upstairs.

Lily emerged sleepily from the staircase wearing a nightgown that she'd covered up with a cardigan. "...You all look like you've been fighting."

"Very astute observation, Mrs. Potter," said Sirius, prodding at a tear in his shirt. "We've had a run-in with the Lestranges and my dear brother."

"Why shouldn't we register our address with the Ministry?" James asked, concerned.

"Because we know for sure now that Voldemort's got someone on the inside with access to all of our locations. They sent letters to Lupin and Black at their home addresses and lured them into a trap at Dearborn's old house. I don't know what they've got up their sleeve, but they've sent a message that they know where to find us."

Remus returned from the kitchen with a tea towel full of ice pressed to his head, and looked to Sirius. "You got a letter too?"

"Yes. Marlene thought something was amiss, so we forwarded it to Alastor. That's why we showed up when we did."

"I'm still waiting on the parchment and the quill," grumbled the aforementioned Auror. Lily went to a cupboard in the hallway and brought him what he asked for.

"Did anybody else get one?" asked Emmeline.

"Not us," said James. "But they've bothered us before."

"Peter?"

Marlene shook her head. "We don't know."

"We ought to check if Wormtail got anything," suggested James.

Sirius shook his head. "Wormtail's the most gullible of us all, and if he'd gotten a letter, he would've been there, too. No offense to Peter, but I don't think he's high on their list."

"I'm the only one who fell for it," Remus said indignantly. He took the letter from his pocket.

"Oi! Give that here!" hollered Alastor, his palm outstretched.

Remus thrust it into his grip. "How could I be so brainless..."

"I had a look at it too. It fooled both of us," Emmeline comforted him, brushing her hand against the back of his. Seeing this made Lily and Marlene smirk sideways at each other.

"And for good reason," Alastor added as he examined the letter. "It's one hell of a counterfeit."

"I'll put the kettle on," offered Lily, who was always thinking of others. Marlene discreetly followed her to the stove.

"Did you ken about them?" she whispered.

Lily giggled quietly as she tidied her potions equipment into one corner of the counter and set out seven cups. "James found them together just this morning."

"Like...found them together, or found them together?"

"Found them after, is what it sounded like to me."

Marlene pointed to the potions set-up. "Still brewing things for Dumbledore?"

"He can't very well ask Slughorn to have the students stockpiling potions for the Order."

"Have you got a cure for a broken heart in there? Because I think Emmie must've raided your supplies."

"I think that had more to do with Remus's supplies."

What Lily and Marlene did not know was that Emmeline had snuck up behind them. "So how was the honeymoon?"

Her voice caused them both to jump.

Lily continued as if it were business as usual. "It was absolutely perfect, I ate every pastry in sight. You two should've seen the suite James booked, overlooking the Seine and everything. I'll develop the photos soon," she said, pointing back to her potions supplies. "I don't know what he was thinking, reserving something so grand when all we really needed was the bed," she said through a salacious smirk.

"Brilliant," said Marlene.

"Gross," said Emmeline.

Lily turned to her with an incredulous smile. "You're one to talk. How was your honeymoon?"

"Don't you mean her honeymoony? You're in big trouble. How long have you two been shagging in secret?"

"Shh!"

Marlene and Lily glared at her with folded arms while they awaited an answer.

"...Well, sort of a week, but-"

"A whole week?!"

"It was so fast, we were afraid you'd think-"

"So you have been bonking."

"Marley."

"I hope Tiberius was properly out of the picture before that all started." Lily, like Marlene, had not been fond of the match; but unlike Marlene, she would not have approved of the infidelity.

"Very out of the picture," Emmeline assured her, flashing them her ring-less left hand.

"Thank God. I mean, you're a catch, and I hope he's not too torn up about it; but thank God."

"He seemed more upset that he wasn't going to be able to get a refund on the diamond. He'll buy another highland hunting lodge and get over it."

"Wanker."

"Oh Merlin, speaking of rings, did you see Bellatrix's tonight?" Marlene interjected.

"What?" That was something Emmeline had apparently failed to notice.

"How could you miss it? It's massive."

"Well I was a bit occupied with my impending demise, wasn't I?"

Lily scrunched her nose. "Bellatrix Black is married? Who would be mad enough to marry her?"

"She's Bellatrix Lestrange now. Sirius found out from Andromeda."

"Rabastan?" asked Lily.

"No, he's promised to an Avery sister somewhere. Rodolphus."

Emmeline made a face like she'd tasted something foul. "God, she's so much older and he's our age, that's worse."

Marlene shrugged. "It's been arranged for a long time, I guess."

"Come to think of it, tonight's events were probably their twisted idea of a honeymoon."

"I know this is all very serious business, but every time we get trouble from that lot, I get oddly nostalgic about school," Marlene admitted.

"Except Rodolphus and Regulus have graduated from jelly-legs jinxes to Unforgivable Curses, which presents a problem," Emmeline jested darkly.

"If Mulciber or Rosier'd been there, it would've been a right-proper reunion."

"You're okay, though?" Lily gestured to a light pink welt settling on Emmeline's cheek where Bellatrix had slapped her.

"I'm fine," she assured her. "In a strange way, tonight helped me make up my mind about something."

"And Remus made a vow of undying love."

"What?"

"Marley."

"Remus!"

"Shh! Lily, don't-"

"Yes?"

"Come in here for a moment, will you?"

Remus stepped toward them hesitantly, still holding the ice to his head. "Why do I get the sense I've done something?"

"Not something; someone," Marlene corrected him.

Emmeline looked at the both of them pleadingly, but their hushed voices did nothing to cushion their words.

"You know, I went to McLaggen's a few days back-"

"The stamina has to have broken a record somewhere."

"Merlin, Morgana and Mungo, Lily-"

"-and I could've been spared from having to gaze upon his ugly mug if only I'd only known-"

"You two ought to go out for the Olympics."

"Lily, oh my God-"

"-you'd locked her in your sex dungeon-"

"MARLEY-!"

"-and were too busy fornicating-"

"I reckon the triathletes would shake in their boots."

"-to let us in on the fact that you'd resolved your rigamarole."

"Don't get me wrong, we're thrilled, but-"

"Are you two being safe?" Marlene hissed.

Emmeline turned stiffly to Remus.

He'd flushed bright pink, and his jaw may as well have been on the floor - but he was spared further torment when the tea kettle began to sing. Waving her wand, Lily flicked off the stove and enchanted the kettle to divide its contents among the cups.

"If you're all done merrymaking in there, may I remind you that two of you were lured into a trap not too long ago?" Alastor chastised them matter-of-factly, summoning them back to the front room.

"I'm not finished with you," Lily warned Remus, depositing tea bags into the cups as Marlene helped levitate them out to each person.

He took his cup from the air and swiveled to Emmeline, astounded. "…Godric, they are menaces, aren't they?"

"Told you."

"Somehow, that was worse than the Cruciatus…"

Emmeline's eyes widened. "...The what?"

"Vance! Lupin!" Alastor called.

"We can talk about it later-"

"Are you okay?" she clamored, grabbing his face.

He set down the tea and took her hands in his, removing them from his cheeks. "I'm fine now."

"Who?" she snarled.

"Regulus." Not wanting to keep Alastor waiting, his eyes darted to the front room.

Emmeline pointed a finger in his face. "He's going on my shit list-"

"I'm pretty sure Padfoot has that covered-"

"-and you're getting a very long, very thorough consolation massage later," she whispered as she passed him on her way to rejoin the others.

Remus watched her walk away, wondering if it might be worth it to get in the way of nasty curses more often.

"As I was saying," Alastor continued with a mug of tea in his hand. "It's imperative that you take as many precautions with your safety and your whereabouts as possible. We already know Voldemort's had his eyes on recruiting a couple of you," he added.

"What about our addresses and such?" asked Sirius.

"Leave that to me and Dumbledore. You'll be receiving one letter in the next week about the meeting on the nineteenth. If you get any more than that, let me know immediately."

"Thank you for looking after us so well," said Lily. Alastor might've found this condescending or insulting had it come from anyone but her, but he had a soft spot for Lily. He began to fold up the letter he'd composed.

"Wait, Alastor." Emmeline stepped forward. "Before you send the note, could I have a bit of that parchment?"

Puzzled, Moody handed her a piece of paper and the quill. "Sending Dumbledore a love note?"

"No, I'm accepting his offer to join the Order again." She handed Marlene her tea, then propped the parchment against her back to scribble out a message as everyone else exchanged looks of delight.

Alastor smirked with approval. "Welcome back, Vance."