From the playlist:

Down - Simon, Trella

Souvenir - boygenius

rises the moon - Liana Flores

Black Friday - Tom Odell

Ch 60 - The Paper

February 1st

Remus awoke feeling as though every delightful thing he'd ever experienced was being absorbed up by a great, terrible sponge.

He perked up rather quickly when he realized how frigid he was. Shivering violently, he pried his eyes open. It was so dark that the only thing he could see was his own breath in the air. Someone was dragging him through a dark corridor, though he heard no footsteps on either side of him - only drawn out, sort of clicking breaths. He managed to raise his head enough to glance at a skeletal, decaying hand latched onto his bicep.

He jerked up fully and was met with the ghastly void of a dementor's hood.

"Wait, wait, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT-" he shrieked to no avail. Even the sound of his voice was being sucked from the atmosphere. He spun to the other side where a second dementor had hold of him. "PLEASE, NO- PLEASE-!" He began to thrash in their grasp, kicking his legs out in front in an attempt to slow their death march.

Amid his useless flailing, the dementor to his right twisted around so that it was facing him, and for a moment, Remus felt as though his consciousness was being extracted from his body through a straw. Everything in his vision began to close in around him, and he passed out again, falling limp into the grip of the dementors once more.

The next time Remus came to, it was because he'd been thrust to the rocky ground. While he was trying to recover from the feeling of being siphoned into the abyss, he recognized the distant sound of metal clinking behind him. Feebly, he turned and saw the bars.

He was being locked in a cell.

He was in Azkaban.

By the time he peeled himself woozily from the ground, the dementors were already drifting away down the corridor. He yanked on the bars, knowing this would do nothing to make them budge, but the effort of standing up and moving after his run in with terror incarnate was enough to make him lightheaded again. He hunched over, now holding on to the iron so he wouldn't fall to the ground.

Feeling a cold sweat coming on, he brought his hand to his forehead and noticed he was wearing a striped inmate's garment. He didn't think he'd ever felt worse in his life, prison cell or not. This was more than just an absence of happiness; he knew that feeling. This was something worse. This was despair.

"Moony…"

Remus flinched when a voice like sandpaper called to him from the darkness of the next cell over.

"Moooooonnnyyyyy…"

And just when he thought it couldn't get any colder, his blood turned to ice.

Slowly, he straightened up and turned back to see two dirty hands wrapped around the bars connecting the cell next to his.

Remus spun back toward where the dementors had gone and shouted into the corridor. "Put me somewhere else!"

Sirius Black emerged from the darkness adorning a nauseating grin. "They won't listen."

"Get me out of here!"

"There is no 'out of here'!" Black screeched, his voice resonating off the rock and battering Remus's ears.

Staggering back, Remus met his sunken eyes. Those eyes had stared Prongs in the face, called him his brother, then stabbed him in the back. They'd taken advantage of Lily's kind, trusting heart and drawn up plans for her demise. They'd watched as he blasted Wormtail to bits.

Remus was consumed with the white-hot rage, and it made his whole body quake. It thawed the frost in his blood, and in a sudden burst, he rushed the adjacent cell, trying to snare Sirius in his clutches. He thrust his arms through the bars, smacking his head against the iron, but just missed Sirius before he backed up.

"Too slow," Sirius tisked. "Never there in time."

"I'll kill you," Remus snarled, grunting as he tried to squeeze through the bars and rip him apart. "I'LL KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID!"

Sirius rose and strode about his cell like it was his throne room. "Looks like it's just you and me, Moony-"

"YOU BASTARD-!"

"Sleeping in the next bed over, just like the dormitory days."

The fact that he had the gall to mention their time at Hogwarts was revolting. How could he have done what he did if he remembered even an ounce of what they'd all been through together? "How could you-...How could-...they-...PETER WAS YOUR FRIEND!"

Sirius rolled his eyes in annoyance, completely devoid of regret. "Stupid sod. He just got in my way really, and let's be honest, I think I did everyone a favor."

"JAMES AND LILY TRUSTED YOU! YOU ORPHANED YOUR GODSON!" He was beginning to scream himself hoarse.

"The Dark Lord showed the Potters what happens when you defy him," he corrected him matter-of-factly, hanging his arms out the bars of his small window in the rock. "All I did was point him in the right direction."

"IT MIGHT AS WELL HAVE BEEN YOUR WAND THAT TOOK THEIR LIVES!"

"And where were you, hmm?" Sirius questioned, whipping his head back toward him.

Remus's arms stilled. "What?!"

"I may have let their secret slip, but you weren't there to protect them," Sirius reminded him, coming away from the window.

"I-...I had orders from Dumbledore-"

"You had your orders. I had mine."

"NO, I-...I didn't mean-"

Crouching down to get on Remus's level, he grinned again. "You walked away. You killed them, too."

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"

Sirius only laughed.

"YOU'RE A MURDERER!"

"Well what exactly are you in here for, Remus? Where's that pretty girlfriend of yours?"

Remus turned his back, slumping against the bars. "Wake up, wake up," he whispered to himself.

"Oh, that's right." Sirius chuckled darkly. Then, he let out a shrill, mocking howl up at the moon.

"Just a nightmare…it's just a nightmare…"

Suddenly, Sirius's voice was much closer. "Would you like to join her?"

Before he could turn, Sirius reached through the bars and hooked his arm around Remus's throat-

Remus shot up off the mattress, grasping at his neck. Before he could utter a word, Emmeline tossed her book aside and enveloped him in her arms.

"Nightmare," she murmured, kissing him. "Only another nightmare."

Remus clutched her firmly to ground himself back in what was real. "No kidding…"

"How bad?"

"Really bad," he breathed, suddenly very grateful that he could breathe.

"It's over now," she whispered, rubbing his back.

He'd been having dreams of this nature on-and-off for the last month. Violent, vivid dreams, always having something to do with the events of Halloween, or Emmeline becoming a casualty to his disease; or both, apparently. Now, as they entered February, Remus wondered if he'd ever find the will to make the nightmares stop.

With Emmeline still in his arms, he scooted back down onto the mattress, noticing the sunlight dappling her face. "What time is it?"

"Nearly ten."

"At least I didn't wake you in the dead of night this time," he rejoiced mirthlessly, leaning his head back onto the pillow and closing his eyes again.

"I've done that to you loads of times, it's alright."

Registering the time again, Remus opened his eyes, puzzled. "Shouldn't you be at the Ministry?"

Emmeline looked guilty. "I took the morning off from the practice range. Wanted to finish my book."

"That's what you wrote to Alastor?"

"No, but one little white lie won't hurt him."

Remus glanced at the book on the nightstand. She'd been reading Great Expectations, but he suspected she would never pick it up again after Halloween, so she'd opted for another Dickens. "Still on A Tale of Two Cities?"

"Mhm."

"You must've read it a hundred times."

She ran her fingers up and down his arm. "I know, but each time I keep hoping for a different ending."

"That Lucie would end up with Carton and fix him, or that he wouldn't go to the guillotine for her?"

"I don't know. I suppose a bit of both."

"...Is that really why you took the morning off?" He wondered if something else might've been wrong.

But Emmeline grinned against his shoulder. "...I just couldn't bear to leave the bed with you in it."

He cracked a smile, too. "No?"

She snuggled even closer. "Nope. You're far too warm."

"Glad to be of service," he muttered.

"...How are you feeling?" she asked. No doubt the symptoms would start in a few days.

Since he'd just woken up, he took a moment to assess himself. "Alright. A bit run down. The joints are bothersome, but that's not unusual." He would feel much worse after the transformation, so he wasn't complaining. He wished he hadn't taken the ease of the potion for granted.

Back in January, Remus's final transformation on the Wolfsbane had been spent at home with Emmeline by his side. She'd taken the day off and turned it into an occasion so he wouldn't feel so depressed, and even cooked up a breakfast feast like she used to. After the full moon rose, she spoke and read to him all night long to take his mind off everything. With his head resting in her lap, she ran her fingers along the tuft of fur on his scalp, and when she couldn't keep her eyes open anymore, she fell asleep on the floor curled up against him. It was the first time in his life Remus could recall wishing the full moon wouldn't fade so quickly.

"That reminds me," she remembered, rising from the bed and breaking out in a chilly trot to her bag, returning with a handful of manila envelopes. "I was doing a bit of snooping yesterday and found some other options. Outside Exeter."

He sat up, bracing his elbows on his knees. "Now, I have to ask, when you say 'snooping,' what exactly does that mean?"

She curled her lips into each other. "...I may have poked around in Records…" she mumbled, raising her hands up in defense. "Just a bit."

Remus eyed her disapprovingly. "...Records isn't your department."

"Well I can't see why they'd miss a few files on uninhabited houses. I'll drop them back off today after we look."

Since New Years, they'd been searching for places to take him on the nights of the full moon; but so far, nowhere suitable had turned up. Emmeline seemed to have taken action to widen the scope of their search. Before he could protest further, she climbed back into bed and laid out three file folders, opening each one to photos of abandoned residences. Remus poured over the photos, thinking of the shack and shuddering.

Emmeline went down the line from left to right. "This one is okay, but if you look in the corner here, I think it's surrounded by other homes - though they may be empty too, I'm not sure. The square footage of this next one sounds too large, I wager it'll have too many possible exit points. I think the last one might be our best bet. I know it looks sort of run-down, but it's on a few acres, and doesn't seem so big that I wouldn't be able to keep track of the perimeter."

Remus considered his next words very carefully.

"It's near Ipswich. I thought we could go see it tonight…" Emmeline proposed. "Even if it isn't the final choice, maybe it could work just for this month-"

"This doesn't feel right," he confessed, picking up the photo.

"...Would you prefer one of the others?"

"Not the house. This whole plan doesn't sit well with me."

Emmeline huffed a sigh. "I know it doesn't, but it's the best one we've got."

"This was someone's home. I destroyed the shack-"

"We have to find you somewhere else to transform safely. I can't just keep you here in a body bind curse all night long; it'll be painful, and they wear off on you too quickly. I'll come in once the sun's up and set everything in the house right with a mending charm." She took the photo from his hands and set it back down.

He reached under her pajama shirt where the scars were. "That's another thing - I really don't like the idea of you waiting outside all night-"

"Remus we talked about this-"

"-like a sitting duck, especially if you're not familiar with the weak spots of the house yet-"

"Someone has to make sure you're okay-"

"-I just- I don't like this. I don't like it at all."

"I wish we had another option, but we're running out of time. The full moon's next week-"

"I know it is," he accidentally snapped, covering his eyes with his palms.

Emmeline reached up and ran her fingers through his hair to soothe him.

He let go of the breath he was holding on to. "I'm sorry." He didn't want to argue...

"...Can we at least go see it?" she petitioned him. "If it's not right, we'll visit one of the others tomorrow."

"...Alright."

She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "We're going to figure it out."

He nodded, biting down hard on his tongue.

"I'll put the kettle on for you," she offered, returning the folders to her bag before heading into the kitchen.

"...How did you even get into the Archives?" he called to her as he rose from the bed, wincing.

"I paid attention in Concealment and Disguise. The door opens for the training staff, so I imitated the instructor's voice."

Remus tried to swallow an impressed smile as he came into the kitchen. "I'm starting to get the sense that you're a menace at work, you know. You'll give poor Alastor a coronary one of these days."

"Alastor is fine, he's a menace in his own right," she said as she rummaged in the fridge. She set down the jug of milk she was holding and looked up at him earnestly. "I know you disapprove, but I'd do anything to help…"

Swallowing hard, Remus admired her with longing in his eyes. "I know you would…"

"And if a bit of mischief is required, so be it," she declared through a sideways grin, closing the fridge.

He looked away somberly. "You sound just like James."

Emmeline's smile faded. "I often find myself wondering what they would have done…"

Remus cleared his throat, changing the subject as he traipsed into the front room to pick up the paper. "When do you suppose you'll complete your training so that you don't have to 'snoop' in other departments anymore?"

"Oh that's right, I forgot to tell you: Last week, Alastor said if I keep working at this pace, he doesn't see why they shouldn't graduate me later in the summer," she informed him over the stream of coffee she was pouring herself.

But Remus registered neither the sound of the coffee, nor Emmeline's voice. His ears suddenly felt as though they were filled with cotton.

He'd picked up the Daily Prophet and noticed the lead on the front page.

SAVAGE WEREWOLF FINALLY BROUGHT TO JUSTICE

"WIZARDING BRITAIN CAN SLEEP BETTER AT NIGHT"

As of Saturday morning, the Magical Law Enforcement Squad has apprehended a dangerous, delinquent werewolf after a month-long search. The beast, known to some by the name William Albury, 47, was detained and taken into custody following the vicious massacre of his family on the night of last month's full moon. Albury, formerly an owl trainer, claims he was attacked some time ago by a werewolf in the ranks of He Who Must Not Be Named. However, due to his negligence to register himself with the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, proof of this cannot be substantiated. On the eve of January 9th while his family slept, Albury, fully transformed as a werewolf, broke free from his restraints in the basement. He proceeded to attack his defenseless muggle wife, Maureen Albury, and their two daughters, Felicity and Christina. Maureen and Christina were found dead at the scene. Felicity was found still breathing and taken to St. Mungo's, but later died of her injuries. Mr. Albury has been on the run since January 10th, and was finally arrested in Manchester by the Hit Wizards. After a swift trial before the Wizengamot, Albury was sentenced to life in Azkaban. IF YOU ARE AWARE OF SOMEONE WHO REMAINS AN UNREGISTERED WEREWOLF, PLEASE CONTACT THE DEPARTMENT FOR THE REGULATION AND CONTROL OF MAGICAL CREATURES, LEVEL 4, MINISTRY OF MAGIC, WHITEHALL, LONDON, GB.

Remus grimaced at Albury's mugshot. He looked sickeningly average.

"...Don't you think?"

Emmeline's voice and the crescendo of the kettle ripped him from his reverie.

Remus folded the newspaper under his arm and tried to get a hold of himself. "What?" he called back into the kitchen.

"I said maybe once I graduate from training, I'll have more leverage to request a day off from work each week. Don't you think that'd be nice?"

"It would, yes." He played off his panic expertly.

"I just want to push myself until I reach the finish line. Everything should slow down a little once I no longer have to attend classes regularly."

Remus forced a smile as he came back into the kitchen. "Completing three years of work in the span of months would be no small feat…I'm so proud of you."

Emmeline looked bashful. "Frank and Alice paved the way. I just followed in their steps."

And as she said this, Remus hid the paper.

…

After breakfast, Emmeline begrudgingly got ready to leave. She really would have rather stayed home so they could make more progress on their planning.

Remus came into the bedroom after she'd dressed in her base layers and watched her attentively from the doorframe. He was not surprised to see that she had selected the green shawl; it was now a staple in her wardrobe.

She was nearly finished, so a goodbye was in order.

"Hey," he said, mantling his arms over her shoulders from behind as she was fastening her cloak.

Emmeline cracked a smile. Her favorite place to be. "Hey yourself."

He planted a kiss onto her neck. "Have a good day."

"Well now I really don't want to leave," she thought, patting his arm. "I'll see you when I get home."

Remus rubbed his lips together for a moment of consideration.

Then, ever so softly, he said: "…I love you."

Emmeline's fingers stilled around the last clasp and she turned to face him, her smile gone. "...What?"

"...I love you."

With her lips parted in disbelief, she glanced back and forth between his eyes.

"What's the matter?"

She had to un-tie the words from her tongue. "...You haven't said that in a long time…"

For a moment his eyes darted to his shoes; but he changed his mind and raised them up to her. "I know. But I'm saying it now."

"...Say it again…" she bade him, studying his face.

He reached up and stroked her cheek with his thumb. "...I love you."

"...I love you, too…"

A small, grateful smile broke through his pensive expression. Drawing her closer to himself, Remus kissed her goodbye.

He held his lips against hers for a good, long while, but Emmeline's eyes remained open for the duration of the kiss as she tried to read him.

When he pulled away, Emmeline didn't want to let him go.

"You'd better be off before Mad-Eye sends a howler," he jested, releasing her.

Unsure of why, Emmeline felt the need to comfort him. "We'll figure this out. It's all going to be okay."

He nodded. "You're right."

She took a few steps back, allowing herself another moment to assess him.

"Go on," he encouraged her, smiling again.

"See you tonight?" she checked.

"See you."