Dear readers, good evening!
Thank you all so much for your support and kind words!
The new chapter is here.
Rhett and Scarlett continue to move towards each other, by touch. They are talking and it's wonderful, useful for them.
Enjoy reading!:)
P.S. breakfastattiffanygs I think our Captain Butler will go crazy with worrying about his wife during one pregnancy, I'm afraid more would just kill him:)
Chapter 13
After saying a warm goodbye to James and making arrangements to meet in Savannah tomorrow, Scarlett and Rhett with the children went to their home. On the way, Scarlett said she would send a note to Gladys with the coachman at the shop to join them tomorrow. Rhett only nodded absent-mindedly, he was very thoughtful.
"How do you like James, Rhett?" asked Scarlett quietly suddenly, mentally hoping for a positive answer.
They had already reached the house and the children were coming in. Rhett suddenly took Scarlett's hand, wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tightly against him.
"What's wrong, Rhett?" she whispered softly, breathing in his scent.
He whispered, not letting her go, "Why didn't you tell me about his wife, Scarlett? About the baby? I'm so sorry... I don't know how he's getting over it. I wouldn't have got over..."
Scarlett hugged him back, realizing how worried he was about her and said, "He has a daughter, Rhett. A little girl who looks just like our Ella. He lives for her."
Rhett nodded and said, "He's a good and decent man, I can feel it. We haven't talked to him much, but I expect to get to know him better. He's a journalist, isn't he?" he asked, letting her go.
Scarlett nodded, pleased that Rhett liked James. That he didn't see him as a threat like the other men.
"Let's go inside, Rhett. I'll find the coachman and send him to Savannah, and then we'll have lunch."
As she wrote the note, Scarlett pondered the "other man" and the "threat" her husband felt. If they were getting closer to each other, opening up, they were going to have a conversation.
Scarlett sighed, finished the note, folded the small piece of paper, put it in an envelope, and went to find the coachman.
That night, after tucking the children, she settled into his embrace at the headboard of the bed and realized it was time to talk. She wanted to explain.
"Rhett, there's something I want to tell you," she began gently, knowing what reaction her next words would elicit. He stroked her shoulder affectionately and said, "I'm listening, Scarlett."
But she needed to hear it once again before she could tell him.
"Rhett," she called to him softly, "did you really want a baby?"
His hand froze for a moment, then only gripped her shoulder tighter and he answered huskily, "Very much, Scarlett. I think I went home that night happier than ever. I wanted it very much, and I wanted to talk to you and apologize for that conversation, and when Miss Melly informed me of the incident, I don't think I ever felt so terrible."
"You believed it was yours? In spite of all those awful rumours in town about me and..."
"I didn't believe it, Scarlett, I knew it for sure," he interrupted her, not wanting to hear this name.
She took his other hand, his big palm in hers and continued, "I want to explain about Ashley, to tell you..."
She felt his tense with her back and heard the phrase, "For God's sake, Scarlett, let's not let Ashley Wilkes into our bed right now at least."
She turned sharply to him, flashed her green eyes, and said seriously, "I'm not letting him into our bed, Rhett! I'm here with you. Let me finish talking and you'll understand, okay?"
He looked at her with a frown, but nodded and Scarlett pressed herself against him again, he didn't remove his hand and she didn't let go of his palm from her hands.
"Rhett," she suddenly asked seriously, "what did you lose in the war?"
Rhett hesitated and didn't answer immediately. His family was still alive, he had no friends, rather he had gained a couple of mates like Colonel Anderson. Yes, their family estate outside Charleston had been damaged, but not badly. The house had survived. He hadn't lost her, though after their parting on "Rough and Ready" he'd barely breathed from horror while thoughts of her fate were taking over his mind and he, being an atheist, prayed to all the gods that only she would be okay.
So he hadn't really lost anything, but rather gained a reputation as a brave blockade runner, made millions.
"Because of this war, Rhett," she began, not waiting for his answer, "I've lost my old life. My childhood friends. I lost my mother and almost immediately my father. We lost our money. I barely defended the house and, you know as well as I do, what I did to pay that damn tax," she said, her voice already shaking, but managing it, she continued, "my life had been ruined. Many lives had been ruined, yes. There are few threads left to tie me to the past. Ashley was one of them. Then at the sawmill we began to reminisce, and you know I don't like to do that, it hurts so very, very badly. I began to cry, Rhett, and he just put his arms around me like Will would or Uncle Henry... You know, it grieves me to lose people from my past and tear up these threads. If there's no one who remembers me as that Clayton County girl, pretty, spoilt and carefree, I think I'll forget it myself. It will turn from a memory into smoke and fly away. And I don't want to forget that me and that life. It was my happy childhood, my youth, our home and my parents..." she couldn't hide her tears as she finished the last sentence, and then she let go of his palm and pressed her hands to her face.
He hugged her gently by the shoulders, and his heart was bitter. Bitter for the South, for the broken lives, especially for her. He understood that she and Ashley had nothing at the sawmill, but how she felt about that wooden gentleman at last...
And Scarlett, as if reading his thoughts, pulled her hands away from her face and looked up at him seriously.
"I'm going to have to break this thread with Ashley, Rhett. He really hurt and let me down by making me look like a whore in front of the whole town. Didn't protect me. This isn't the first time I've expected him to support me as a friend, Rhett. Like a relative, like a childhood friend. But apparently he doesn't think I'm worthy of that either. It doesn't matter. I don't love him, Rhett, I feel sorry for him," she finished, and looking again into her husband's eyes, she suddenly released herself from his embrace and lay back on her pillow. She was afraid he would laugh at her, reproach her.
But he only lay behind her, hugged her tightly around the waist and whispered, "Scarlett...Darling...You know, I remember you too, that young, beautiful girl! The image of you in the library at that barbecue is with me forever, you were belligerent, brave and so charming. I remember you like that. I do." He hugged her more gently and burrowed into her hair, kissing her neck. He felt that she froze at his words, but was silent, and then, running his palm through her hair, he touched her cheek and felt that it was wet. She fell asleep in his arms, crying quietly. She did something she hadn't allowed herself to do in years. Something, that Ashley had inadvertently opened that day at the sawmill. She was mourning her past, her youth, her parents, her friends, her lost life.
In the morning Scarlett thought she woke up before he did, it was sunny outside the window, soft light already filling the bedroom. She remembered how she had cried in his arms, how he had gently stroked her hair, her shoulders, how he had whispered something tender.
Scarlett smiled slightly as she lay on his chest and, softly, barely touching, ran her palm over his shoulder. She was about to get up, but she felt one of his arms wrap even tighter around her waist and heard him whisper, "Good morning, Scarlett. You're not escaping so easily today."
She giggled and raised her eyes to his and said, "Good morning, Rhett. I haven't run off anywhere, it's just that the time, look, it's almost eight. I have to get up, get cleaned up, call for Prissy to lace me up, then wake the children, have a quick breakfast and get ready. At ten o'clock James, Lizzy and Gladys will be waiting for us, on the promenade by the river, in Savannah and..." Scarlett was speaking so quickly, and Rhett suddenly laughed, he had missed this her temperament so much!
Scarlett sat up on the bed, a little dishevelled and her nightgown slipped off one shoulder. She frowned belligerently and said, "Rhett, stop laughing at me! You'll see, you'll run out of time again and..."
Before she could finish the sentence, he suddenly pulled her to him and kissed her hotly on the lips. Scarlett responded to the kiss, but then, taking a moment to pull away from him again, she sat up and crossed her arms over her chest.
"Rhett Butler! You're a varmint and you won't listen to me! I don't have time, I have to call Prissy and the children are probably awake by now!"
Rhett smiled, sat up, hugged her gently and spoke, "Come here, you, crazy girl. You're barely awake, come to me... Give me ten minutes Scarlett, then I'll lace you up myself..."
She looked at him incredulously, but he pulled her to him again and for twenty minutes she drowned in his kisses, his embrace and his hot breath. Rhett played with her, knowing that this morning would end with nothing, that the children were really probably awake by now. But it felt so good to be with her, to be able to touch her, to feel her reaching for him and trembling at his touch. He'd be patient...
That morning, leaving 20 minutes later than they had planned, Scarlett kept hissing at him that they were late, and Rhett only laughed back at her, saying that they weren't going to meet the Queen of England and that James would probably be late himself. She hissed at him again that Gladys was punctual, to which Rhett jokingly said that she hisses like "a cat that's been doused with water" and paid for it with her scowl.
When they were all seated in the carriage, the children nestled against the windows, Rhett leaned over to her and said quietly, "Come on, Honey, don't be angry. Nothing bad is going to happen even if we're late. I didn't mean to make you angry now, and in the morning I'll..."
"Rhett, shh," Scarlett said with round eyes and pointed at the children.
He smiled his pirate smile and quickly ran his hand over her face.
They were only ten minutes late, and as they pulled up, they saw Gladys standing there, talking politely to James. They were both calm and smiling. Lizzy stood nearby, watching the boats as they sailed down the river and fishermen.
Rhett got out of the carriage first and helped Scarlett and, while he was helping the children, Gladys was already by her side and kissed her cousin's cheek cheerfully, "Well, well, my cousin doesn't change! Confess, Scarlett, is it your outfits that have held you up?" she asked, giggling. And continued, "Remember how Uncle Gerald always got mad when you took a long time to get dressed and always threatened to leave without you?" She asked with a smile.
Scarlett hugged her cousin and replied, "But he never once did. Daddy loved me."
The children were already talking to each other, Ella introducing Bonnie to Lizzy. James and Rhett shook hands and listened with interest to the conversation between the two cousins.
"Actually, the lateness is my fault," Rhett said to Gladys with a smile and extended his hand to her, "Allow me to introduce myself, Rhett Butler, your cousin's husband."
Gladys politely shook his hand, introduced herself and eyed him with interest, remembering their conversations with Scarlett.
"It seems," she thought, "they have settled some matters. They two look cheerful."
"Scarlett, Honey, what about Bonnie? Where's your youngest daughter? Will you introduce us?"
Gladys found Scarlett's youngest daughter adorable and said with a laugh, "She looks just like you, Scarlett, I'm sorry, Mr Butler, but she looks just like her mother!"
Rhett just smiled happily and said, "Oh, I'm happy Bonnie looks so much like Scarlett. As long as they don't both get cranky at the same time, I'm afraid I can't handle it," he joked, and everyone laughed, while Scarlett wrinkled her nose a little and whispered in his ear, "You're unbearable, Rhett!"
They strolled slowly along the promenade as the children walked ahead, Wade leading Bonnie by the hand, and Ella and Lizzy walking beside them, discussing something.
Rhett enjoyed the walk, watching the cousins talk to each other, and realizing more and more that Scarlett had said that it was important for her to have those threads connecting her to the past, not because to live in past, but because she wanted to remember herself as young and carefree.
The seafront was alive with people strolling leisurely. Ladies in their finest toilets and with lace umbrellas in their hands to protect them from the sun. Gentlemen in wide-brimmed hats. They met a couple of artists, probably they came from Europe, for Rhett heard French speech.
Vendors with flowers and sweets that the children could not pass by quietly.
By lunchtime they were tired and Gladys called them all over to their house for lunch as was the tradition.
While the adults sat at the table and talked, the children were left to themselves and Bonnie with Lizzy and Ella sat in a corner of the cozy living room, playing with a small ginger cat.
"Where's your mummy, Lizzy?" suddenly asked Bonnie.
"She's not here, Bonnie. Granny says she's in heaven," Lizzy answered quietly.
Bonnie frowned, then asked, "Who pities you when something hurts? Who strokes your hair while you fall asleep?
Lizzy thought for a moment, then said, "Daddy or Grandma..."
Bonnie frowned again, then told her and Ella firmly, "Lizzy needs to find a new mummy!"
"That's not how it works, Bonnie," Ella said softly, "There is only one mother."
Lizzie took her pink ribbon out of her hair to play with the cat, Bonnie played with her blue ribbon, but Ella remained very pensive and sad for the rest of the dinner.
There was talk at the table that the season would soon be over and the vacationers would be leaving, and Brian asked Rhett and Scarlett with interest what their plans were.
They both looked at each other and shrugged, and Scarlett just said, "We haven't thought about it yet, Brian. But, there are children, and they have activities..."
"But they're young, Scarlett, and they might miss the start of class. They can study on their own, especially Wade, he is so clever!"
Scarlett only smiled at him, and Rhett was thoughtful as well.
"Come and visit us in Ireland. There's beautiful nature waiting for you there, the ocean, green hills, delicious food."
Scarlett smiled again and only said, "I don't know, Brian..."
"Promise you'll think about it!" he concluded good-naturedly and Rhett nodded to him.
At the end of lunch, which lingered and turned into dinner, Lizzy approached Scarlett and Gladys, who were talking on the sofa by the fireplace, and shyly asked to have her hair braided. Gladys agreed, and while Scarlett was quietly sharing with her the news that Rhett really had wanted their child, she carefully braided the light red strands of the little girl, who sat on her lap without moving.
James watched them quietly from the other corner of the living room, where they were drinking brandy with Rhett, Brian, and another relative from Ireland who had recently been in London and was sharing details of his journey.
His daughter missed her mother, and he missed having a friend by his side, a companion. But what do you do if your heart doesn't start loving on demand?
It was time for them to get ready to go home and with a polite nod to the gentlemen, he walked over to Scarlett and Gladys, who had Lizzy sitting on her lap.
"Daddy, look how beautifully Gladys has braided me?" said his daughter cheerfully, and James smiled affectionately and said, turning to Gladys, "Thank you! We have to go now, but I'll stop by your shop tomorrow and drop off the book I told you about today, Gladys!"
She only smiled affectionately at him and nodded.
That evening Scarlett was sitting at the dressing table, already dressed in her night gown and had thrown on a silk dressing gown without tying it. Slowly, one by one, she removed all the pins from her hair, and her hair cascaded down the back and shoulders.
Rhett was still with the children, after the trip to the city they all had heaps of impressions and wanted to share with each other, but she was very tired and the conversation at the table made her wonder. What's next for them? Where will they go? They can't live here indefinitely, after all, the summer season will soon be over, the weather will get worse, the children, Wade especially must have lessons. The girls need a governess.
Scarlett thoughtfully picked up a hair brush from the table and tried to brush her hair, but her hands wouldn't listen, her hair tangled, she was annoyed. She didn't want to go to Atlanta. With all her might she resisted going back to that damned city. Yes, there was Melly and Mammy, there was their home, but she didn't want to see and live among other people, to see their pinched lips and wrinkled noses.
The door creaked open and as she looked in the mirror she caught his gaze, then she saw him shift his eyes to her hair and, closing the door behind him, walk over to her. His hand reached for the brush and he said quietly, "Let me, Scarlett..."
She gave the brush to him and looked closely at his face in the mirror, he kept his eyes on her hair, gently but skilfully untangling the strands, brushing it with one hand, running his hand through it with the other, smiling slightly to himself.
"Rhett," she quietly called out to him and caught his gaze and smiled, "why do you like it so much and have always liked brushing my hair?"
He smiled at her and without stopping what he was doing replied, "It seems to me, and always has seemed to me, that it's a very intimate process, that it's just for two people. And you know, your hair... I've always been attracted to it, it's soft and, um... it smells nice," she smiled back at him and he continued, "Do you remember Scarlett, when I used to bring you presents from the blockade? Do you remember the different hairpins I brought you?"
Scarlett nodded, remembering that he had indeed often brought her dainty hairpins, bobby pins, combs, and handed them to her with a sly smile.
"Did you bring them to me on purpose?" she asked suddenly, guessing.
He smirked and said, "Scarlett, you were such a child, weren't you? When you saw another hairpin or comb, you'd often let your hair down in the parlour and in front of the mirror you'd immediately try out new hairpins, while I was watching... Remember?"
She smiled back at him and said in a joking voice, "How cunning and devious you are, Captain Butler."
He suddenly put the brush aside, leaned down behind her and whispered, "Scarlett..." His hands moved to her waist, feeling her without her corset. He touched his lips to her neck, she was wracked with heat as his hands stroked her waist up and down her sides, up and down.
He gently lifted her from the couch where she was sitting and held her by the waist, turning her to face him. She was lovely, her loose hair, her green eyes, the blush on her cheeks. His gaze slid lower, to her breasts, which were heaving with rapid breathing, and Rhett realized how much he missed her, how much he wanted to be with her, to love her.
He lifted her chin affectionately with one hand, and they were silent. Rhett decided not to say anything, but to go by feel, he knew that lips and hands couldn't deceive.
He leaned down to her face and gently touched her lips with his lips, he felt her move closer to him some more... He deepened the kiss and she responded.
The room was silent, only the faintly audible gasps and his whisper amidst the languid kisses, "Sweetheart... Scarlett..."
He ran his hand through her soft hair and she stroked his shoulders, his neck. It seemed like nothing could stop them...
"Mummy..." heard Scarlett a child's voice from somewhere outside... "Mummy..."
"Bonnie?" whispered Rhett questioningly, opening his eyes and pulling away from the kiss.
"No, Ella..." said Scarlett quickly and, smoothing her hair, walked towards the exit. Rhett followed her.
In the nursery, where Wade and Bonnie were sleeping peacefully, Ella sat quietly and watched the entrance with anxious eyes. She was really expecting Mummy to come in, not Prissy.
So she did, she saw Mummy and Daddy come in looking at her anxiously.
"Baby," Rhett whispered softly, noticing the other children were asleep and taking a seat next to Ella, "what's wrong? Did you call for mummy? Are you in pain?"
Ella only replied, "I want my mummy."
Scarlett touched Rhett's shoulder and pointed to the door with her eyes. He understood without words and saying, "Come on, baby," took Ella in his arms and quietly walked with her to their bedroom. Scarlett followed.
Seated on the bed, between her parents at the headboard, Ella was silent and Scarlett decided to begin.
"Ella, Honey, what's wrong? It's late, everyone's asleep. Are you in pain?"
The girl shook her head negatively.
Scarlett rejoiced, childhood illnesses always made her nervous. Even a common fever threw her out of sorts.
"Did you have a bad dream?" followed by Rhett asking.
Ella nodded slightly and suddenly began to recount, "I don't remember exactly, it was about Mummy. She disappeared, like Lizzy's mother and I stayed alone."
"Baby," Scarlett began gently, "Lizzy's not alone. She has a daddy, a grandmother, and a grandfather."
"But I'm on my own. I don't have a grandparents, Mummy..."
"What about me?" suddenly asked Rhett and continued, "our family is big, baby. You got Daddy and Wade, and Bonnie. And Aunt Melanie."
Ella sat pensive, and Scarlett thought back to the time when she'd been lying there after the miscarriage and realized that Ella had no one but her. Rhett was thoughtful too and just stroked Ella's hair.
"Ella," Scarlett said firmly, "nothing is going to happen to me."
"Yes," Rhett said suddenly serious, "I'll take care of your mother, Ella."
"Gladys's daddy took great care of her mummy too, he loved her, but she got sick anyway. You love my mummy, don't you, Daddy?" Ella asked suddenly, looking into Rhett's black eyes.
Rhett froze, and Scarlett thought bitterly, "God, not now... Questions like that..."
"Baby," she interrupted the silence confidently, "everyone in the family treats each other well, takes care of each other. It can't be any other way," she finished with a smile, but Rhett, suddenly reaching up with his free hand to touch her, looked earnestly into her green eyes, then turned his gaze to Ella and replied, "Of course I love your mummy, baby. And all of you."
There was silence in the room.