Best Friends to Lovers

A somewhat loose sequel to "Without Strings"

A/N: This is a multi-chapter story that came about in response to my one-shot "Without Strings." This story will stand on its own, but I believe readers will have a better framework to this one if they first read the one-shot. "Without Strings" was set in the middle of S9E7 and centered around the last time we see Michael Hagarty in the series. I found it really interesting that that episode aired in November 1992, with two out of the next four episodes taking place in Cabot Cove, showing Seth in vulnerable situations with Jessica. We first have S9E9 in December 1992, "A Christmas Secret," where Jessica gives Seth the train engine. Then, in S9E11 in January 1993, "The Final Curtain," Seth's friend, David North, comes into town and murders his blackmailer.

This new story picks up shortly after the end of S9E11 after Seth's friend confesses. There are some great images and quotes from these two episodes, both Jessica mentioning what Frank once said, that "Christmas should remind us of what could be and not what is," as well as a great scene with Seth appearing disheveled in Jessica's kitchen with his bow tie undone after a night visiting with his friend, David.

This story is currently 8 chapters plus an epilogue and it is complete but in rough draft form. I will edit as I go along and hope to post a couple of chapters a week. Because I needed Jessica to be able to bicycle and walk in Maine in the winter, I changed the timeline from January to begin in March to at least give the illusion that it would be possible to be outdoors. Please leave a review if you enjoy it.

I don't own these beautiful characters, but Jessica is my muse. I happily follow wherever she leads.

Chapter 1

Jessica Fletcher had certainly not intended to open her heart to a romantic relationship quite so quickly, when she had told Michael Hagarty right before the holidays that their on-again off-again relationship was over. Realizing that she wanted a permanent and more importantly, committed relationship, with someone she could trust and that someone was definitely not Michael Hagarty, she had said goodbye to him in San Francisco, kissing him one last time against the hotel suite door, before she left, not looking back as she strode off for the elevator.

She had been surprised at how emotional that last goodbye had been, as she had told him two days previously that she needed to have a break from him. A permanent one. They never had any type of relationship, no understanding, other than they would enjoy each other's bodies whenever they would see each other in whatever part of the world they ran into one another. She had caved after telling him that it was over that one morning. She had, in fact, enjoyed going to bed with Michael several more times before saying a final goodbye. When she walked out of his hotel suite to head to the airport, she had known when she left his room that now, it was really over. She had seen in his eyes that he had known, too.

While they never spent more than three or four days together at any given time and only once or twice a year, they had been in that pattern for over seven years. Because of his intelligence work and her innate intuition, they had grown to know each other well, despite the lack of total time or consistency that would be required in other intimate relationships for most people.

Michael had planned to stay in San Francisco for another few days with his daughter, Andrea, before he flew back to England, but it had been time for Jessica to take her leave.

They had sex one last time that morning, before he would let her get out of bed to leave for the airport. He had been gentle and loving, even though neither were in love with each other and had never tried to pretend they were. But they did have a great fondness and care for one another. They were firm friends. Good friends who had a mutual respect and attraction for each other and they had found great comfort in one another over the years.

Michael had called the bellhop to take her bags down to the cab, allowing him a few final moments in the suite to say goodbye in private. He did not offer to take her to the airport; he knew she would not allow him to anyway. Instead, he had followed her to the door. She had started to pull it open, as though she would simply give him a cursory kiss on the cheek and duck out.

"Oh, no, you don't, my girl. I need a proper goodbye," and with that, he had kept her from opening the door, turning her around to lean against it, moving his mouth over her own, a sense of urgency, as though it would be the last kiss that either of them would ever experience again, not only their last kiss together. Wrapping his arms around her warm body, he kissed her with everything he had. He was not trying to convince her to change her mind. He knew she knew her own mind without needing any help from him. Besides, she was choosing wisely by giving him the boot. She was far too lovely to be alone the rest of her life. He hoped with everything in him that she would find the love she craved. Probing her mouth, feeling her tongue against his own, and hearing her sigh and moan filled his senses, as he tightened his grip on her arms. God, she was incredible. Always so responsive. He would miss this. He would miss her.

Pulling away, he stared at her face, watching her catch her breath and open her beautiful blue eyes, as though she had woken up to reality again. "Jess, you go find your happily ever after. We have had some good times and I'll miss you, my girl. But I hope you find whoever you are looking for."

"Thank you, Michael," she whispered, this time giving him one more soft brief kiss, before making eye contact one final time. When she turned back for the door handle, he let her go.

She had been surprised to feel the tears form and fall, as she rode the elevator down to the lobby. She did care for him. But it was time to try something else. She was not sure exactly what, but she needed to explore her options.

S/J

Jessica should not have been surprised, but she supposed she still was overwhelmed at how quickly things changed when she returned home after that final interlude with Michael.

Christmas came and went with Seth being moodier than normal, only to discover that he was a bit stuck in past grief from his childhood. It had taken her by surprise to understand the depth of loss he still felt over not getting the train set he had so desperately longed for as a young child of ten. She had given him the little train engine at the Christmas party surrounded by friends and she had regretted the decision later. She realized by his expression that he was overcome with emotion and she should have waited until they were in private. She had bought him a complete train set with the tracks. She had only meant to give him the engine at the party for him to have a hint. Based on his reaction by the engine alone, she felt ashamed that she had not protected his emotions better.

What had she been thinking? She hadn't.

When Seth brought Jessica home later that evening, she had led him into the living room where the rest of the train set and the tracks were set up under the Christmas tree. His face had lit up as brightly as the lights covering the tree and mantle, and before he could turn to race out to his car to retrieve the engine, she touched his arm to stop him. Holding up the box it was in, she asked if that was what he wanted, only for him to snatch it out of her hands before leaning down to attach it in one fluid motion. She worried belatedly that he would get down on the floor and not be able to stand back up, but he was so happy that she held her tongue. Instead, she prepared them fresh coffee, bringing the steaming mugs into the living room to place on the coffee table. Sitting on the sofa, she watched him for a half hour before he came back to earth. It had been remarkable to see him so vulnerable as he rearranged the tracks to his liking and she had to fight tears as she had a glimpse of the boy he must have been once.

Seth did struggle to get off the floor later, but he did manage when he gripped the coffee table with one hand and her own hand with the other. Sitting beside her with their coffee, they had not really said anything that night. But something changed. It had been intangible and yet, the sensation was real and present in her heart.

He had thanked her profusely that evening when he said goodbye and she had smiled, receiving the kiss on the cheek and the tentative hug he had given her before walking out the back door. She had promised to help him pack up the train set after Christmas Day, so he could take it home. He had tried to hide the tears gathering in his eyes both when he first saw it and when he said goodbye, but he had not succeeded, even though he did manage to keep them from escaping. She did not call attention to them though. She would not embarrass him. She cared far too much for him to tease him.

Was that the happiest she had ever seen him over a train set? Even though she knew it was not really about the train set anymore. The trigger may have been the physical object, but it was really about the past heartache he had over his childhood, feeling that grief as an adult still, and now, being able to receive the gift he had most desired all those years ago. She was under no illusions that the train set and his emotional reaction was about her at all. But she did hope that by listening to his grief and heartache and then providing the desired object, that this piece of his heart would begin to heal. To her, that was what Christmas was about these days. Love and healing.

Then, after the New Year, Seth's dear friend, David North, had come into town to take part in a local play being produced at the community theater. David was a famous actor who Seth had followed his career with pride and affection. When it was discovered that his friend had murdered his blackmailer while the play was in production because of proof the blackmailer had about a colleague's death that David had been responsible for when he was drunk and behind the wheel many years previously, Seth had been shattered.

Immediately after the dust had cleared and the friend had been charged and taken away, Seth had looked lost and frozen in shock. Giving him a tight hug that evening, she told him she would check on him the next morning.

Now, the morning after, Jessica had a sense of unease, only to discover that without telling her, he had taken the day off. He had left a note for Beverly to cancel his patients and took off in his car.

Jessica had ridden her bike to check on him that morning and to bring him a loaf of fresh baked bread that she was hoping would coax him to eat. Discovering only Beverly there, on the phone canceling and rescheduling patients, she was troubled. Both of them were. Not at the fact that Seth had taken the day to himself. He clearly needed time alone. But as he never did that no matter what and had not told anyone where he was off to, it was troubling. Saying goodbye to Beverly after asking her to call her if she heard from Seth, she pedaled her bike home, slowly, deep in thought.

Jessica had planned to return to New York after the play debuted, which would have been tomorrow night, but she was too concerned about Seth. She knew she couldn't leave town right now.

Oh, be honest with yourself, Jess, you can't leave him right now. You don't want to and you can't.

Returning home, she worked around the house all day, doing odd chores that she had been putting off for some time, periodically ringing Seth's number to see if he had returned home. By six o'clock, when he still would not answer, she made up her mind. Putting a few things in her bicycle basket, she bundled up in her coat and scarf and returned to Seth's house, letting herself in with her key, propping her bike against his back door, out of view from any curious neighbors.

She could tell by the quiet that no one was there and she felt certain that Seth had not returned since she and Beverly were here this morning.

Climbing the stairs to his private rooms, she went into the kitchenette and started the kettle for some hot tea. She had grabbed the bread she had brought earlier this morning off Seth's desk downstairs and set that on the counter, looking for a bread knife. After slicing off a piece, she put it in the toaster and found the butter. Sitting down at the small wooden table, she sipped on her tea and nibbled her toast.

She would wait for him.

Sometime in the middle of the night, Seth pulled his car into the garage, and turned off the ignition. Leaning his head against the headrest, he sighed heavily. It had been a long day and although he had tried to find peace, driving along the coastline, stopping periodically to watch the water and sit in the sun with his hat pulled low over his eyes, his heart was still heavy. He supposed it was like most things and would take time to feel peace again, but damn it, if this whole thing didn't make him furious. What a way to waste your life! David had everything and he threw it away. Yes, David had been responsible for driving drunk all those years ago and it caused his friend's death, but that had not been intentional. Although, it would have made for a public scandal, he could have survived that with a less serious criminal charge and an apology that would have been sincere. Instead, he committed murder against his blackmailer and then tried to cover it up.

He would never understand some people.

Heading up the stairs, Seth saw the kitchen light on and grumbled. Had Beverly come upstairs for some reason? He knew he had not left it on. Muttering under his breath, he turned the switch off and turned down the hallway to his bedroom. He could not wait to succumb to sleep. But he stopped mid stride. What was that? Was someone snoring? It was soft and coming from the living room couch. There was only one person who would dare enter his house at this time of night and wait for him. But it couldn't possibly be, could it? He took a few steps into the room, peering over the back of the couch, not sure if he was hoping it was her or not.

He was right though. It was Jessica, sound asleep, stretched out on his couch, a pillow from his bed under her head and a blanket from the linen closet tucked around her body. God, she was beautiful. He had only seen her sleep a handful of times over the years, usually when they took road trips and the monotony of the road lulled her to sleep. On those occasions, he had to keep his eyes on the road, so other than the sporadic glance, he never got to truly watch her. She did not have any makeup on tonight, but her skin looked clean and soft and he was tempted to stroke her cheek, yet refrained. He suspected she had been here for a while and must have taken her makeup off to get comfortable, deciding she may as well sleep while she waited on him to come home. Not sure if he should wake her or not, he contemplated her face. She was always so active that to see her still was a novelty, her eyes closed and face relaxed. He could see the blanket shift slightly as she took each breath in and out. He would give all that he had to be with her, not have her out here on his couch, but snuggled up with him in his bed down the hall.

Her brow scrunched up suddenly. Was she dreaming or waking up? Either way, she no longer looked peaceful. Instead, she began looking troubled, her limbs shifting in her sleep, which made his decision easier.

"Jess?"

"Hmm?"

"Jess, it's me, Seth. Wake up."

"Seth?" Blinking her eyes, she moved to sit up, seeing him in the dark room with only the hall light to see.

Moving around the back of the couch, he perched on the side of it and reached for her hand. He wasn't sure why, but the situation was intimate enough that he had the courage to do so. She readily latched on to it in response, squeezing it.

Fully awake now, she ran her other hand through her hair.

"Seth, where have you been?"

"Everywhere and nowhere in particular."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that I got up this morning and I knew I wouldn't be any good for anybody, especially my patients, so I got in my car and started driving up the coast and I just got back a few minutes ago."

"I was worried about you."

"Ayuh, I can tell."

Allowing his eyes to once again take in her frame, he watched her blush, as she moved to give him his pillow back.

"I'm sorry, Seth. I got so sleepy a little while ago that I snooped. I found the blanket in the hall closet, but I needed a comfier pillow than the couch ones…I know I shouldn't have gone in your room, but…"

He interrupted her, "Woman, you can have anything you want or need of mine at any time."

"What?"

"Just what I said."

"Oh."

"Now, I don't suppose you want to sleep on this couch in your clothes all night. Do you want me to drive you home now?"

"Oh, Seth, I can stay here on the couch. You look exhausted. I don't want you to have to get back out. I don't even know what time it is."

"It's past midnight."

"Oh my, even more reason. No, I'll stay here tonight. Could you drive me back in the morning?"

"Ayuh, but if you stay, you need to go sleep in the bed and I'll stay out here on the couch. It's only right."

"Don't be silly, Seth. I'm already here."

"I'm a gentleman, Jess. I wouldn't be able to sleep in my bed, knowing you were on the couch."

"Well, then, maybe we should sleep in the bed together," she said exasperated, throwing her hands up in the air. But even as she did, the air went out of the room, leaving them both breathless and silent.

They stared at each other for what felt like hours, but was probably only a minute, both trying to find the words to speak.

"Alright," Seth said, his voice rumbling. He didn't know where he got the nerve to call her bluff, maybe it was the late hour, or his own exhaustion, or his absolute desire to have her in his bed, even if he would not sleep for a moment. Suddenly, having her there beside him was the greatest need he had.

She jolted in shock at his agreement, even as she saw his face shift. She swallowed. He needed her. She didn't think he needed her in a lustful way, but she knew he needed the comfort that she could provide with her presence.

She didn't say anything, but she stood up gathering the pillow and blanket waiting to follow him down the hallway. He started to freeze when he realized that she was really going to join him, but he could not seem to stop her either.

Entering his small, but clean and tidy bedroom, he turned the lamp on the bedside table. Quietly, he asked if she would like something more comfortable to wear to sleep in. Until that moment, she had forgotten that she was still in jeans and a sweatshirt.

"Oh, yes, do you suppose I could borrow a pair of pajama pants and maybe an undershirt?"

He rummaged around in a dresser finding both, before asking her if she wanted to change in the bathroom first.

When she returned, he paused to take in her appearance, trying to steady his breathing and the pounding of his heart. How could she look so lovely wearing his old clothes?

Holding up his own nightclothes by way of explanation, he walked past her into the bathroom. When he returned, she was still standing by the bed, nervous.

"Something wrong, Jess?"

"I didn't know what side you sleep on."

"Normally the right, but I can make do on the left. I know you sleep on the right, too."

"You do?"

"Ayuh, I have made enough house calls for your back pain over the years, haven't I?"

"Oh, yes, I suppose you have."

Not giving her any more time to overthink, he moved to the left side of the bed and got in, pulling the covers up over his waist. He didn't say anything. He simply waited until she got in beside him, before he turned off the light, casting the room in darkness, the only light the small night light from the hall.

He could feel how rigid her body was beside him. She was on her back, as he was, with perhaps five or six inches between them. The bed was a queen with enough room for two, but close enough that his body was on alert to her every movement.

"Seth?"

"Ayuh?"

Instead of saying anything, she reached out tentatively to feel for his hand. Finding it, she clasped it with her own, rubbing his knuckles with her thumb.

She heard a sharp intake of breath, before understanding that he was trying not to sob. Without further thought, she turned on her side, reaching for him, pulling his head to her chest, letting him weep against her, as she traced soothing circles on his back. She had been right. He had needed her. He needed her comfort. Maybe one day there would be more between them, but tonight, she was here and she could give him this.

It was a long time later before either of them fell asleep, but even as they nodded off, they remained in each other's arms, Seth's head on her breast, her hand on the back of his neck.