The Grimm Knight of Hell
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Chapter Five: Pilot.
Jaune Arc tossed and turned in his bed. Sweat coated his body and rolled down to the bed below. His blonde hair became damp and clung to his forehead. His breathing was heavy and erratic, with grunts of discomfort escaping his lips. His features contorted into a frown, gritting his teeth.
His mind was rapid and active, not stopping for a moment, making it difficult for him to sleep.
"A Monster!"
Jaune-in his monstrous knight form-standing in front of a large horde of Grimm. Varying from low-rank to high-rank Grimm. A head of the horde was the city of Vale. Jaune's red eyes glowed brightly as he unsheathed his sword. He pointed his weapon at the city, this led to the horde to charge at it.
"A Demon!"
Grimm rampaged through the street, mauling several Humans and Faunus to death. Blood and gore decorated the walls and ceilings of various buildings. The screams of civilians filled the air. Jaune lumbered through the burning streets, dragging his sword behind him. A team of Huntsmen appeared in front of him, one with blonde hair, one with blue hair, one with green hair, and one with red hair. Jaune raised his weapon up, ready for combat.
Jaune swung his sword at a team of Huntsmen. The swing instantly bisected one of them, cutting through his aura completely. The others tried to ambush him but Jaune swung his sword again. Decapitating one and gutting the other. The last Huntsman tried to attack from behind but was impaled by Jaune's Deathstalker tail-which sprouted from his back.
Jaune ripped his tail out of the body with great force, causing the corpse to get ripped in two.
Jaune began to convulse violently. His body went stiff and limp in a rapid session. His hands gripped the sheets, nearly tearing it.
"A Murderer!"
Jaune-in his monstrous knight form-stood over a pile of dead bodies. A city was burning behind him while Grimm tore through the remains like butter.
Jaune looked at the destruction around him, a satisfied and sadistic gleam filled his eyes. Almost as if he were smiling.
Jaune then lifted his blade high into the air, letting out an echoing roar throughout the city.
The other Grimm turned to him and followed suit. Their roars and growls echoed through the burning night sky. Celebrating a successful massacre of Humans and Faunus.
"A Killer!"
A pair of eyes snap open showing blood red irises with pitch-black sclera. The eyes belonged to a feminine face, the skin was pale white with black veins. A cruel smile soon graced its features. And then she spoke.
"Just. Like. Me."
Jaune's eyes snapped open and shot straight up, yelling. "NOOOOOO!"
Jaune then blinked slowly and his breathing slowed down. He closed his eyes and brought a hand to his sweaty forehead, moving the damp strands of hair out of the way.
Another nightmare, he mused. They had been getting more frequent and felt much more real.
'Oh well, it's just a dream. Nothing to worry about.' Jaune thought to himself.
The blonde laid back down on the bed. 'Nothing to worry about.' He told himself mentally as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.
I.M.P. HEADQUARTERS
Jaune let out a tired sigh, rubbing a hand all over his face. He made his way towards work, eventually making it to the front door. He twisted the knob and entered.
Upon entering he found Loona at the receptionist desk, scrolling through her phone in boredom. Again.
"Hey Loona." Jaune greeted her with a smile.
Loona instantly perked up when she heard Jaune walk in. "Jaune!" She greeted him with a smile.
Jaune walked up to the desk and leaned on the counter.
"So what's new?" He asked.
"Eh, not much, Blitzø and the others went on job." Loona answered.
"Already? This early in the morning?" Jaune asked, a bit surprised at this. Usually Blitzø will be in his office for an hour before leaving topside.
Loona shrugged her shoulders. "Apparently the client wanted it done as soon as possible." She responded.
"Huh, guess it's just us then." Jaune said with a smile.
"Yeah." Loona said with a blush and smil. Her tail started wagging in excitement.
Jaune got off the counter and went to grab a chair. He placed it down near Loona's chair and took a seat next to her. The Hellhound scooted over to him while reaching in the bottom of the desk and pulled out two cans of beer.
"Want one?" Loona asked, handing one towards him.
Jaune raised an eyebrow. "Isn't it against the rules to drink on the job?"
"It's Hell, who's gonna give a shit." Loona said simply.
"Fair enough." Jaune said as he took the beer. He and Loona opened their cans and playfully toasted each other.
Jaune immediately made a face and stuck his tongue out in disgust. The taste of the beer did not sit well with?
"You never drank before?" Loona asked.
"Kind of, though it's usually on special occasions. Even then I rarely drank." Jaune said as he put his drink down.
"Huh, never knew that." Loona said as she took a sip of her beer. She leaned back and arched her back and stretched her arms out. This also has the effect of pushing her bust outwards, catching Jaune's attention.
Jaune swallowed a big lump as his eyes were glued to Loona's chest. He normally didn't act like that, but thanks to her giving him his Grimm side his instincts and hormones were increased dramatically. Thankfully not to the point where he acted out on impulse but they were still there.
The kiss that they almost had, before Blitzø interrupted, while in his "Beowolf" form was proof of that. Jaune remembered when his instincts were calling out to him, telling him to take Loona then and there. To mark her as his and his alone, even though at the time he didn't know that was the reason.
While Jaune was busy looking at her chest, Loona noticed his stare. She was a bit caught off guard by it but that was replaced with a playful smirk.
"Seeing something that you like?" She asked playfully as she placed her beer on the desk.
Jaune snapped out of his daze and his face turned bright red. "I wasn't looking…I mean was but I didn't mean to! It just happened." He began to sputter out nervously. His hands moved frantically as he did.
Loona grabbed onto his hands and stared deeply into his eyes. "Relax, it's no big deal." She told him. Jaune sighed in relief until Loona got closer to his face. "I actually kinda like it." She said in a husky tone.
Jaune felt a shiver of delight go up his spine. His eyes flashed briefly before he did something that surprised Loona and himself; he pulled her into a kiss.
"Hmmph!" Loona yelped at the sudden action. She felt Jaune's lips intertwining with her. And if she was being honest, the feeling was pure ecstacy. She moaned in his mouth as she returned the kiss.
The kiss got more and more heated as their mouths opened up, allowing their tongues to wrestle with one another.
Loona at the feeling of Jaune's tongue exploring every corner of her mouth. She pushed herself into Jaune's lap-still in a lip lock.
Jaune responded by wrapping his arms around his back, bringing her closer to him. His left hand lowered down onto Loona's ass. He gave it a squeeze, causing Loona to yelp. Jaune broke the kiss before planting more down the Hellhound's neck.
Loona began to pant heavily. Jaune's kisses down her neck and his hand groping her ass was too much for her. Instinctively, she started to grind her hips on his crotch.
This resulted in Jaune groaning out in pleasure, which resulted in him massaging Loona's ass cheeks even more. He soon felt the crotch area of his pants tightening. He had a hard on.
Loona felt his bulge and smiled in satisfaction that she got that kind of reaction from him. She sped up her hips, grinding into him harder. Loona grabbed his face and pulled Jaune into another lip lock.
Their tongues wrestled for dominance, saliva being transferred between them.
They broke the kiss once, a line of saliva connected their mouths. Their faces were red as they panted heavily.
"Jaune." Loona breathed out. "I want you to fu-"
RING! RING!
The sound of Loona's phone ringing caused the hot and heavy atmosphere to vanish. The both of them groaned in annoyance.
"Fucking Blitz." Growled out Loona as she got off Jaune's lap. She grabbed her phone and quickly replied to Blitzø before going to grab the grimoire. Leaving Jaune alone.
Jaune blinked before letting out a sigh of frustration, Blitzø had inadvertently interrupted an intimate moment between him and Loona. What was worse is that he still had his erection, he needed a way to get rid of it. So he closed his eyes to think of unsexy thoughts. However, all his mind could think about was Loona and him in various sexual positions. All of which caused his erection to grow even more.
"Fuck!" Jaune cursed out. He ran a hand through his hair in annoyance.
He let out another sigh before closing his eyes again, this time he thought of something else.
"Monster."
Jaune snapped his eyes open and started to breathe a little heavier than before. He looked down at his crotch and saw that his boner went down. Jaune leaned his head back and let out a deep sigh, he ran a hand through his face as he did.
Noticing that something was off with his hand, Jaune looked at his hands and saw that they were claws. He looked at the rest of his body and realized that he was in his "Beowolf" form.
"Did I transform by accident?" He asked himself.
His ears twitched as he picked up the sound of footsteps. Jaune looked up to see Loona walk in with the grimoire.
The Hellhound opened it up and read the incantation to open a portal to the mortal world. Soon enough, a portal opened up and Blitzø, Millie, and Moxxie came through. And they just so happened to bring something back with them…or rather someone.
"Is that a kid?" Jaune asked in confusion as he stared at the unconscious child.
"It's a long story but that doesn't matter because…staff meeting!" Blitzø cried out.
"What?" Jaune asked as he raised a brow in confusion.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
Jaune (still in his Beowolf form), Loona (who was on her phone bored), Moxxie, and Millie sat in the conference room as Blitzø paced in front of them. Behind the tall imp was a white board with various diagrams and notes, the most prominent being the words 'Fix this shit!'
"Now I know that business has been a bit slow and it's no one's okay. I'm not naming any names…Moxxie." Blitzø said as he placed his hands on the table before giving Moxxie a pointed look.
Moxxie gave Blitzø an incredulous look at his implications.
"Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how to get business drumming up again?"
Millie then shot up in excitement, her arm waving as she did. "Oh, oh, what about a carwash?" She suggested.
"This is Hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being cleaned down here, okay." Blitzø said, shooting down Millie's idea.
"Well actually some people do care, especially the rich." Jaune threw in his two cents.
Blitzø however, ignored the blonde sinner, much to the blonde's chagrin. "It's a waste of time and money. Ooo, how about a Billboard? People like billboards." Blitzø said after pondering for a moment.
Moxxie rolled his eyes before speaking. "We can't afford a billboard sir."
Suddenly Blitzø appeared beside him and wrapped an arm around him. "Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad that you're in the room right now." Blitzø then pushes him off his seat.
Jaune rolled his eyes and let out a sigh as he got up to help Moxxie up.
"Thanks Jaune." The white haired imp thanked the blonde.
"No problem, Moxx." Jaune said.
They both turned to Blitzø as he spoke up again.
"Anyways, do I need to remind you what kind of service that we provide?." He said as he took out a remote and turned on the TV. The screen flickers until it starts playing the commercial.
While that was going on, Jaune went back to his seat, next to Loona, and watched Blitzø huddling in front of the TV and watching the commercial. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his thigh, rubbing it in a sensual manner. Dangerously close to his crotch. He looked down to see it was Loona's hand. He turned to the Hellhound who noticed his stare and looked at him with side eyes. She smirked playfully as she continued to rub his thigh.
Jaune held back a growl as he didn't want Blitzø, Millie, and Moxxie to know what was happening.
His reaction made Loona's smirk grow even bigger as her hand moved closer to Jaune's crotch. Her fingers wrapped around his bulge.
Jaune's breath hitched the moment he felt her fingers on his dick.
Loona's eyes widened as she felt the sheer size of Jaune's dick, even though it was flaccid. She gave it a quick squeeze and started to rub it. Getting more muffled groans out of Jaune. She then felt that Jaune was starting to get hard from her actions. She clenched her legs tightly as she felt a heat build up between her legs. Her tail swayed side to side. The Hellhound bit her lip gently as she sped up, wanting to see how long she could keep teasing Jaune.
"Ah, those were good times."
Not long apparently as Loona immediately retracted her hand, much to her and Jaune's displeasure. With the blonde letting out a frustrated huff.
Blitzø turned back to them with a bucket of popcorn in his hands, that got from…somewhere. Millie was in the background eating some of the popcorn.
Moxxie then spoke up. "I don't need any reminding, sir." He then narrowed his eyes. "Considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel... nobody watches."
"I actually have to agree with Moxxie on that, I found out about you guys by complete accident. Seriously, no one watches that channel." Jaune spoke up.
Blitzø blinked in surprise and then turned to Jaune and Moxxie. "Uh, hey. Excuse me? What's "obnoxious" about a super fun jingle, alright? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spitting bullshit!" He said.
Jaune simply rolled his eyes at his boss's answer.
Millie then butted in. "People love musicals, sir."
"When they're done professionally." Jaune muttered quietly.
Blitzø gave Millie an approving smile as he snapped his fingers. "Exactly, Millie! And we're basically doing a musical." He said as he does jazz hands. He then turned to Moxxie with a faux sad look on his face. "Are you gonna crush my musical theatre dream like my dad did?"
"Oh for fuck's sake. Not this shit again." Jaune groaned as he pinched the bridge of his nose. This was the fifth time this week that Blitzø brought up his musical theatre dream.
"Tell me about it." Replied Loona as didn't look away from her phone.
"Sir-" Moxxie tried to say something but was cut off by Blitzø. "Cause, right now? All I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside." He said with tears in his eyes. Though no one knew if he was being serious or not.
Millie then leaned towards Moxxie. "Are you tryin' to crush his dreams, Moxxie?" She playfully asked her husband.
Moxxie turned to his wife with a bewildered look. "I-- What?"
"I thought I knew you." Millie said flirtatiously. She then playfully sticks her tongue out at him as Moxxie blushes and rolls his eyes affectionately.
"I can't believe you, Moxxie!" Moxxie turned his attention back to Blitzø. The taller imp tearfully holds up an employee of the month plaque with Moxxie's picture on it. The picture in question has Moxxie making a weird face. "After I made you employee of the month!"
"Okay, sir! I'm sorry; a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre. Nobody actually likes jingles!" Moxxie replied in a defeated tone.
"I liked it." Millie interjected.
Moxxie blinks incredulously as he points at Millie. "Do not--Do not agree with him in front of me!"
Jaune sighed one more time in annoyance before speaking up. "Not to sound like an asshole," Moxxie, Millie, and Blitzø turned to the blonde sinner, "but how does this explain why there is a human child in our office?" Jaune gestured to the unconscious child.
"Oh that's simple, want to answer that Mox?" Blitzø turned to Moxxie with a stern look.
"Me?!" Moxxie asked in outrage. "Sir, you were the one who brought him, not us!"
Blitzø then countered. "True, but you're the one who got us in that situation to begin with."
The two imps then began to argue back and forth.
Having enough of their arguing, Jaune slammed his fist on the table. This caused Moxxie, Blitzø, Millie and Loona to jump up in surprise.
"Answer my fucking question!" Jaune roared in anger, his eyes flashed red while his voice went deep.
"Alright, alright, don't get your panties in a twist." Blitzø said with his hands up. He then started to recall the tale on how and why they brought a child back with them to Hell. "Well it started like this..."
FLASHBACK
The scene cuts to the I.M.P. commercial.
Blitzo walks in front of the camera. "Hi, there! I'm Blitzø! The "o" is silent, and I'm the founder of I.M.P.!" He introduced himself. He gestures to the logo as it appears on screen, then disappears. "Are you a piece of shit that got yourself sent to Hell, or are you an innocent soul who got FUCKED over by someone else?!
Two pictures of Blitzo in different scenarios show while he speaks. The first shows him wearing two top hats through his horns, a monocle, and twiddling a fake mustache, while standing outside of a burning building with a sign that reads "Orphanage for Elderly Blind Newborn Dogs" appears. The second shows Blitzo wearing an angel costume at a coffeehouse happily throwing an empty coffee cup in a trash can, instead of the recycling bin right next to it.
The commercial cuts to a demon guy wearing an Ohio sports jersey, giving a testimonial, while Blitzo holds a cardboard sign in frame that reads "Some guy who hired us!!"
"After lovingly killing my wife for *in demonic voice* fucking the delivery man," The demon said, yelling the last part in anger. "You can imagine my surprise when I wound up here, after the state of Ohio killed me! I really wish I could stick it to that yappy jogger *normal voice* who saw me hiding the body!" He finished as he slammed his fists together.
The scene then cuts back to Blitzo as he is speaking to the camera and holding a grimoire, while Moxxie and Millie are arranging lit candles on the floor in a pentagram. While he speaks, his eyes narrow as he does a magical gesture with his hand and a flaming portal appears on the floor. Moxxie and Millie run off in surprise. He tosses the grimoire away as he walks up to the portal.
"Well, luckily for you. Thanks to our company's special access to the living world, we can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over when you were alive!" Blitzø exclaimed as he fell backwards into the portal.
The scene transitions to a person with their arms crossed and a thought bubble appears depicting another person being crossed out as the commercial jingle plays in the background.
Singer: When you want somebody gone,
A dead body falls near the person as they notice and look up.
Singer: and you don't want to wait too long
Moxxie, Blitzo, and Millie are shown in a circle logo. Blitzo holds his arms out as Moxxie holds up his rifle and Millie holds up her spear. A letter "I" appears to the left of them, while a letter "P" appears on the right of them. The trio together form a letter "M", thus spelling the initials I.M.P.
Singer: call the Immediate Murder Professionals!
Blitzo, Moxxie, and Millie are inside of their building and Moxxie throws a grenade out the window. The trio cover where their ears would be as an explosion goes off. A severed arm goes flying.
Singer: Hand grenade or cyanide,
Blitzo is shown hanging someone with a rope as Millie finishes writing a suicide note.
Singer: We'll make it look like suicide
Blitzo is shown electrocuting someone, Millie is shown hitting someone on the head with a mace, and Moxxie is shown strangling someone.
Singer: The Immediate Murder Professionals!
The I.M.P. logo spins around quickly as the scene transitions to Blitzo creating a portal to the living world in a wall, then jumping through it. He is followed by Millie and then Moxxie, who trips over the grimoire and falls into the portal.
Singer: We do our job so well,
The trio come up through the other end of the portal and adjust themselves.
Singer: Because, we come straight out from Hell!
The I.M.P. trio suddenly look shocked as it appears they have accidentally teleported to a church in the middle of a service. A female preacher and the congregation look back at the demons in confusion and/or fear. One bearded man, however, has his head laid back as he sleeps with earbuds in.
Millie is shown struggling to remove a knife from a naked couple who are in 69 position, while Moxxie tries to look away, and Blitzo examines a pair of panties.
Singer: We'll kill your husband or your wife
Blitzo stabs someone tied to a chair repeatedly in the head while sporting a goofy expression.
Singer: We'll even let you keep the knife
A quick sequence then shows the trio assassinating their targets in numerous horrific ways, such as with a medieval torture chamber, riding a shark, burning someone alive, suffocating someone with a pillow, playing on a grand piano after it crushed someone, and using an electric chair. In the final scene, the trio are hiding in a bush in a park and Moxxie is about to shoot a blonde woman looking at her phone from behind.
Singer: We're the Immediaaaaate... Murderrrrrr... Profession--
The jingle abruptly stops when Moxxie accidentally shoots a boy passing by, eating an ice cream cone.
"AUUUGH!" The boy cried out as he fell to the floor.
The boy collapses as Moxxie looks on in shock. Blitzo and Millie turn their eyes to Moxxie in surprise.
Cuts to a hospital operating room. The boy is wheeled in on a hospital bed by a doctor, a pink-haired nurse, and a blue-haired nurse.
"Doctor, he's not responding!" The pink-haired nurse said, though her voice was surprisingly masculine.
"Cool water, stat!" The blue-haired nurse called out.
The pink-haired nurse whacks the boy in the face with a bucket of water, doing nothing but leaving a large welt on his face.
"It didn't do anything!" The blue-haired nurse cried out in a panic.
The boy's tongue flops down from his mouth.
"Dammit! I'm not losing another one." The doctor exclaimed as he brought out a defibrillator.
Everyone has their defibrillator paddles over the boy. "CLEAR!" The doctor yelled as They all zapped the boy.
The boy gasped as he woke up due to the shock of the doctor and nurses.
"Holy shit! It actually worked." The doctor said in astonishment.
Cuts to Blitzo, Millie, and Moxxie who are waiting outside the boy's hospital room. Blitzo is reading a magazine, while Millie comforts Moxxie, who looks devastated. The doctor comes out of the room with a clipboard.
"He appears to be in stable condition, but he'll need surgery." Doctor said as he looked up from the clipboard. "Now, what insurance provider do you freaks have?" The doctor asked.
His response was the confused looks of Blitzø, Millie, and Moxxie.
"The fuck is insurance?" Blitzø asked.
A shot of the outside of the hospital is shown, as a window breaks and the boy's hospital bed flies out. The boy is unconscious in the bed, while Millie, Moxxie, and Blitzo are holding on for dear life as they plummet screaming to the ground. The bed is stopped by a rope that has become tangled around Blitzo's foot. Blitzo slams his face into the bed, the rope snaps, and they all continue to fall.
A still shot of the I.M.P. logo is shown.
Singer: Kids die for freeeeeee!
FLASHBACK END
Jaune blinked as he processed what he had just heard. It was the most absurd and idiotic thing he had ever heard in his entire life! And he knows Nora and Ruby! The blonde sinner rubbed his eyes, trying to reduce the headache he was feeling.
Moxxie spoke up. "I'd like to go on record and say that incident was Loona's fault." He gestured to the Hellhound who had her feet on the table. "Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target. It's very simple."
The imp's words caused Jaune to snap his head up and give him a hard stare. A low growl escaped his lips. He didn't like it when someone insulted Loona. Though he did manage to calm himself down and let it slide. Since this was Moxxie.
"Oh, sit on a dick, Moxxie." Loona replied, while not looking up from her phone.
"YOU sit! Sit on... a... and the... d-- DO YOUR JOB!!" Moxxie yelled, trying to come up with a comeback but failed miserably.
Blitzø then interjected. "Hey, now. We don't blame our screw ups on Loona, okay?!" Blitzo hugs and nuzzles Loona, who snarls at him in response. "She didn't do anything wrooooong~" He finished in a baby voice.
Moxxie looked at his boss incredulously. "...Are you kidding me, sir? She's awful!" He exclaimed.
"Hey, watch it!" Jaune shouted. "I know you two have some differences but that's uncalled for." He said, a snarl escaped his mouth as he said the last bit.
Moxxie gulped a little. While he considered Jaune a friend, there were times where the blonde simply terrified him. Especially when he's angry. The incident last week came to mind.
FLASHBACK
Jaune was humming to himself as he walked up to the fridge in the break room. He opened it up to get his lunch, however he stopped as soon as his eyes looked inside. Jaune blinked as he opened and closed the fridge door, making sure that he wasn't seeing things. After confirming that he wasn't, he scowled. He turned to his co-workers; Moxxie, Millie, and Loona.
"Okay, who's the asshole who ate my lunch?" Jaune asked.
"Wasn't me." Loona answered.
"Not me." Millie replied.
"Neither did I." Moxxie responded.
Jaune crossed his arms and said. "Well, someone here ate it. And I want to know who."
On cue Blitzø walked into the break room, eating Jaune's lunch. The tall imp hummed in delight before noticing that everyone's eyes were on him.
"What?" Blitzø asked, confused as to why everyone was staring at him. His mouth was full of food.
"Is that my lunch?" Jaune asked in an eerily calm manner. That made Moxxie, Millie, and Loona feel slightly on edge.
Blitzø continued chewing as he lifted up the bag and saw that Jaune's name was on it. "Huh, so it is." Blitzø said nonchalantly as he took out a chicken nugget out of the bag and popped it in his mouth.
Moxxie, Millie, and Loona immediately hid behind the couch as a malicious and heavy aura filled the room. That aura was being generated by a calm yet angry Jaune who stared Blitzø down, with the tall imp standing still in fear.
Blitzø gulped nervously as he looked Jaune in the eyes. Those red orbs looked like they were going to set him on fire. Jaune then summoned a giant sword, causing Blitzø to start sweating in fear.
"I'm going to give you a five second head start before I maim you for eating my food." Jaune said calmly.
"Duly noted." Blitzø said before he bolted out of the office.
Five seconds later, Jaune ran after the taller imp and less than a minute later, Millie, Moxxie, and Loona started to hear screams. This was shortly followed by the sounds of flesh hitting flesh and not in the good way.
"Ack! Hey, Jaune let's just talk about thiiiis ssssss, ow! Aaaahhh! My tail!" Blitzø cried out in pain.
"Die you fucker!" Jaune yelled out.
"Hey, I'm your boss you can't treat me this waaaaayyyyy-aahhhhhhh!" Blitzø tried to say only to yell out in pain again as Jaune started to beat him.
Millie, Moxxie, and Loona looked at one another and made a silent agreement to never piss off Jaune.
FLASHBACK END
Moxxie shuddered. He then looked at Jaune with an apologetic look. "I'm sorry if I sound harsh Jaune but Loona has done some questionable things lately." He said vaguely.
FLASHBACK
Loona was sitting at her desk, reading a magazine called "Hellhound Monthly". Her desk phone rings with the sound of a cute puppy barking as the ringtone. Loona picked up the phone and answered, all while not looking up. "Hello, I.M.P." She said in a bored tone.
Millie then answered from the other side of the phone. Panic was evident in her voice. "Loona, I got stabbed! Call Mox–"
Only for her to get cut off as Loona suddenly hangs up, disinterested in the conversation.
Next, she is in Blitzo's office as he presents her with a gift.
"Happy Adoption Anniversary, Loonie! I got you a little somethin'." Blitzø said in a cheerful tone.
Loona looked at him and asked. "Is it a cure for syphilis?"
Blitzø blinks as he starts to stutter. "I... Oh…"
Loona snatches the present and angrily slams it on the floor. "THEN, I DON'T WANT IT!" She yelled. A large swarm of spiders suddenly emerge from the present box and swarm Loona up to her neck. Causing Loona to cry out "UGHHH!"
Blitzo is suddenly hiding outside of the office window "I'm sorry! It was spiders!" The tall imp apologized.
"Goddammit," Loona said in an annoyed, deadpan tone.
FLASHBACK END
Jaune blinked. "I'm sorry, Loona has what?" Jaune asked in confusion.
"Nothing! I have nothing!" Loona quickly yelled. Her face was drained of all color, the last thing she wanted was for Jaune to know that she had syphilis.
Jaune was caught off guard by Loona's sudden change in demeanor. "Are you sur-" "I said I have NOTHING!" Loona growled, getting in Jaune's face.
Jaune looked with a spooked expression. "Okay then." He said, immediately dropping the subject.
Loona sighed as she sat back down on her chair. 'God I need to get treated before me and Jaune get that serious.' Loona thought to herself.
FLASHBACK
Loona is then shown at her desk, watching an online video of Charlie Morningstar performing "Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow". Moxxie approaches her with a flyer for "Chub B Gone".
"Um, e- excuse me. Did you just fax me an ad for weight loss?" Moxxie asked the Hellhound, confused.
"No." Loona replied, not looking away from the screen.
"Wha-- Why- Why would anyone send me this?" Moxxie asked in confusion.
"C'mon…" Loona said as she looked up at Moxxie, "You know why."
The next scene shows Loona rummaging through the break room fridge. Taking out a red box of avocado salad.
"Whoever left the fucking... avocado salad in the fridge, I'm taking it, because I have the worst hangover right now!" Loona exclaimed. Loona turns around to face Millie with the red box in hand as she shuts the fridge door with her foot. She rips off the lid and drinks the salad.
"Why would you drink on a work night?" Millie asked the Hellhound.
Loona stops drinking and glares at Millie. "I'm hungover from this morning, dumbass!" She told the female imp.
Moxxie enters the room and notices Loona with his box.
"Isn't that my lunch?" Moxxie asked.
Loona then drops the box on the floor and growls. "Y'know what?! I can't take this assault right now! I need to blow off some-" She kicks the box at Moxxie, knocking him out of the room and surprising Millie. "-fucking steam!'
Loona runs out of the break room and out into the street.
"AAAAAAAAAAH!" She yelled out.
Loona runs up to a succubus lady passing by on the other side of the street, pushing her baby in a stroller. Loona kicks the stroller high into the air and storms off, while the demon lady stands there in disbelief.
The scene transitions to Loona at her desk, telling Blitzo about a caller.
"Bliiiitzo! That clingy, rich asshole is on the phone! Says it's urgent and wants to talk to you! Sounds a little DTF-y." She called out.
Cuts to Blitzo and Moxxie standing by a water cooler.
Blitzo throws his cup of water on the floor upon hearing that. "Oh, GOD, it was one time!" He cries out as he crosses arms. "If I hadn't slept with that privileged asshole, none of us would have access to the living world."
As a result of Blitzø's outcry, Moxxie stares at him in stunned silence "...You what?"
FLASHBACK
The scene cuts to a flashback of Stolas sleeping naked in bed. He is hooting like an owl and there are feathers everywhere. Blitzo, who is partially nude, walks away quietly with the grimoire in hand.
"Got the booook, got the booook! Got this fuckin' heavy book!" Blitzø whispered to himself.
Blitzo reaches Stolas' balcony and lays the grimoire on the ledge. Grunting, he attempts to step up on the ledge using the grimoire. Instead, the combined weight sends both him and the grimoire falling forward off of the balcony.
"Oh- Oh, SHIT!!" Blitzø cried out.
Blitzo lands on the cake that Stella and her friends are having, splattering pieces of it all over them.
"Oof!" Blitzø gasped out before turning to Stella. "Sorry, I fucked your husband."
FLASHBACK END
The scene cuts back to Loona at her desk.
"BLIIIITZO!" Loona yelled out.
"I HEARD YOU ALREA--!" Blitzø yelled back.
The scene cuts to Blitzo in his office, talking with Stolas, and playing with a bobblehead of Moxxie. "Sooooo, what can I do you for this time, Stolas?" Blitzø asked.
Stolas is shown talking on his phone from a fancy mansion.
"There's a political candidate causing trouble up on Earth for a few of my associates. He's trying to convince people global warming exists!" Stolas explained as he played with the telephone wire with his finger.
Blitzo blinked a bit before asking. "Doesn't it?"
"Well... yes." Stolas answered. "But, more people die if nothing is done about it. And it gets lonely here~",
"Okay, well. Yeah, that makes sense." Blitzø answered back. Stolas then said something through the phone. "You know what happens when I'm lonely, Blitzy?"
Blitzo pulls his phone away and talks to himself. "God-fuckin'-dammit." He muttered under his breath.
Stolas began speaking, at first calmly before it became depraved. "When I'm lonely, I become hungry. And when I become hungry, I want to choke on that red {bleeped) of yours... {bleeped) your {bleeped) and lick all of your (bleeped), before taking out your (bleeped), and (bleeped) with more teeth until you're screaming (bleeped) like a FUCKING baby--!"
Blitzo, who's visibly disturbed, scene pans to him with Stolas name listed as "creepy mouth (aka one night stand bird dick) with a call total of 48 seconds. as he hangs up, a knock out noise plays. He snaps his cellphone in half, smashes it with his desk phone, tosses said desk phone away, pulls out a blender, puts the cellphone pieces in it, and blends them. Blitzo turns and hands the blender to Loona, who was standing nearby.
"Eat this!" Blitzø told Loona
Loona drinks the blended cellphone mixture.
"And then y'know that bridge over the freeway?" Blitzø asked.
"Yeah?" Loona said as she raises her eyebrow
"Shit off it!" Blitzø ordered.
FLASHBACK END
"I didn't need to know that part." Jaune muttered under his breath, disgusted. He then looked up to see Blitzø standing by Loona.
"Look, the point is, Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family." He said. As a result Loona looks up from her phone and briefly smiles, touched by Blitzo's words. Jaune noticed this and couldn't help but smile as well. While she may never admit it to him, Jaune knows that Loona actually cares for Blitzø and appreciates the things he's done for her.
"We aren't a family, sir! You are the boss! We are the employees! You treat her like she's some troubled teenager! She's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones!" Moxxie ranted. As he rants, Loona continues looking at her phone, slowly flipping Moxxie off. Jaune looked at the interaction and let out another sigh.
'I swear one of these days they'll end up killing each other.' Jaune thought to himself before turning to Moxxie. "Okay, Moxxie I see where you're coming from about the 'family' bit but that remark about homeless people is completely uncalled for." He spoke, trying to be the mediator of this situation.
"John is right, that is offensive!" Blitzø exclaimed.
Jaune's left brow twitched at Blitzø mispronouncing his name but let it slide. "Wow Blitzø, I didn't think you would agree with me about something." Jaune said in genuine surprise. However, deep down he knew there was going to be a twist to the tall Imp's words.
"Well of course I agree with you John, because without homeless people, I wouldn't have HALF the joy and laughter I do in this life!" Blitzø said as he walked over to a window and raised the blinds. Blitzo puts his face up against the window, cracking the glass, and sees a homeless demon, looking sad and holding up a sign that reads "Monee helps. Satan bless." A succubus is on her cellphone and turns away from the hobo. Blitzo smugly waves at him, before lowering the window blinds.
"And there it is." Jaune muttered in defeat as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
Moxxie then decided to add something. "While we're on the subject of "family"," He said while making air quotes with his hands, "can you stop finding me and Millie outside of work?" Moxxie finished as he made an annoyed face.
"Come on, sweetie! It's not that big a deal!" Millie said. A Glass shattering noise plays as Moxxie makes a shocked face.
Moxxie turned to his wife. "Excuse me...WHAT?!" He asked in outrage.
FLASHBACK
The scene cuts to a flashback of Moxxie and Millie preparing dinner in their kitchen.
"Honey, can you get me the butter?" Moxxie asked as he was stirring a spoon in a pot of stew.
"Sure, sweetie." Millie replied with a smile. She opens the fridge door and finds Blitzo inside as he hands her the gross, viscous butter.
"Spoiler alert: the butter's spoiled!" Blitzø quipped. This made Millie giggle in response.
Moxxie throws the diced carrots into the soup. He turned to his wife as he heard her laughing. "What's funny, honey?" He asked only to be met with the sight of Blitzø in their fridge.
"Really impressive wordplay." Blitzø said.
"WHAT THE--?! WHY ARE YOU IN OUR FRIDGE?!?!" Moxxie yelled.
Later that evening, shows a building, Inside their Moxxie and Millie are asleep in bed. The former is tossing and turning as the sound of a cat purring can be heard. Moxxie opens his eyes and sees Blitzo standing on him, looking him right in the eyes.
"Whatcha dreamin' about?" Blitzø asked, a curious and playful expression was in his face.
Moxxie frowned at Blitzø and said. "I was dreaming my father was being murdered, but now... I'd like to go back to that."
In the next scene, Moxxie and Millie were sitting on a couch. In Moxxie's hands was a guitar, he played the instrument as he was finishing up singing a song for his wife. With Millie joining in on some parts.
" Of all the imps in Hell, it's for her that I fell " Moxxie sang.
Millie then joins in, harmonizing. " It's for him that I fell "
" Oh, Millie~ " Moxxie finished off as the song came to an end.
They close their eyes to kiss, but Moxxie notices Blitzo outside the window holding a camcorder.
"Are you fucking filming us right now?!" Moxxie shouted.
FLASHBACK END
We cut back to the board room.
"Just... stop... doing that!" Moxxie said through gritted teeth and strained anger.
Blitzo simply shrugs in response, unphased by Moxxie's anger. "I don't see what the issue is! There somethin' you don't want me seein'?" He asked in a teasing tone.
Moxxie's eye twitches in anger "No!"
Loona snickers at the same time as Blitzo talks. Blitzo asked Moxxie, still in a teasing tone. "You a baby-wiener-haver?"
"Sir, what you say and how you act is totally INAPPROPRIATE!" Moxxie responded as he stood up from his chair, the last part of his sentence he yelled in anger.
Millie lays her hand on Moxxie's shoulder. "Calm down, Mox! You're gonna have another panic attack!" She said as she tried to calm down her husband.
"I AM CALM!" Moxxie roars in anger. Moxxie starts whimpering in anger while looking back at Blitzo.
Millie then starts comforting Moxxie. "Shh-shh-shh. There, there."
"Look, I don't judge the boring couple stuff," Blitzø said as he motions his hands to imply sexual activity "you do outside work hours. So, don't... judge me!"
"Oh, I do judge you, sir! Quite a lot, actually!" Moxxie said.
"Mox, he's our boss!" Millie said.
Blitzo waved it off as he said. "No-no-no, it's fine Mills, your husband is just... how do I say this without being offensive?" Blitzo said, smiling smugly, "...retarded."
Jaune raised a brow. "How is that not being offensive? That is the most offensive thing you could call someone." Jaune said.
"I mean he's not wrong." Loona muttered, earning a deadpanned look from Jaune.
"Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad, single life?" Moxxie asked as he frowned at Blitzø.
Blitzo leans towards Moxxie. "It actually does." He replied.
Loona spoke up and looked away from her phone to glare at Moxxie. "The only reason you have a wife is because you're easy to manage!"
Millie slams her hands against the table, looking at Loona with anger. "No, he's not, you BITCH!" Millie yelled in anger as she flipped Loona off.
Loona growls at Millie in return.
"Do not talk to my receptionist that way! She's sensitive!" Blitzø yelled.
Loona then snaps at Millie. "Yes, I am!"
At last, Jaune's patience had started to reach its breaking point. His eyes glowed bright red and the spikes on his body grew slightly bigger. The blonde now Beowolf demon slammed his fists onto the table, shattering it. This caused Loona, Blitzø, Millie, and Moxxie to look at the sinner in frightened surprise.
"E-Fucking-nough! All this arguing is getting on my fucking nerves!" Jaune roared. The I.M.P. started to sweat nervously as a chill went up their spines. However, for Loona it was a completely different sensation as a sensual heat built up in between her legs.
'Unholy shit, that's fucking hot!' Mentally screamed Loona.
Jaune then took a deep breath. "Look sorry for yelling but right now, we need to figure out what to do next in order to fix this shit. Before we all get in trouble." He explained.
Everyone looked at one another. Blitzø then walked up to Jaune and put an arm around the sinner. "Jaune's right! We need to work together to fix Moxxie's screw up!" He exclamation caused Moxxie to give Blitzø a deadpanned look.
"You guys are all fucking assholes."
The sudden voice made Blitzo, Moxxie, Millie, Jaune, and Loona's eyes all widened in surprise. They turned to look at Eddie, the boy Moxxie accidentally shot earlier. Eddie is lying on a table with three wires from a heart monitor attached to his stomach.
"Oh, shut up, kid! You're lucky to witness this!" Blitzø said to Eddie.
Moxxie then pinches the bridge of his nose. "Ugh, this company is such a mess!" he muttered.
"Tell me about it." Jaune added as he let out a tired sigh. Somehow Blitzø had managed to wear him out more than Nora ever did.
Blitzo then went back to standing in front of the board. "Alright, let's get back to talking about my outfit."
"Nobody was talking about that!" Loona said.
"Also how is that relevant to our current conversation?" Jaune asked.
"Which is why I'm tryin' to get that ball rolling. So, how does it look? It's good, right?" Blitzø asked as he gestured to his outfit. Jaune simply sighed at this.
Eddie points at Blitz as he detaches the tubes of the heart monitor. "It's been a literal hell having to pretend to be paralyzed so you fuckshits wouldn't kill me! But, now I want that. I want death!"
"Wow that kid has quite the mouth on him." Commented Jaune's surprised that a kid knew that kind of language.
Eddie once again points at Blitzo. "You are a selfish, greedy clown. And I'm a kid! We're supposed to like clowns! Even the creepy ones!" He exclaimed.
"Hey, now! That's not very–" Moxxie tried to say something but Eddie interrupted Moxxie, intimidating him.
"If I wanted to hear from a spineless jackass, I'd rip out your spine and ask you some shit." Eddie said, insulting Moxxie.
Millie slams her hand on the table, the other gesturing at Moxxie. "That's my husband you're talkin' to!" She replied in anger.
Eddie laughs at her statement. "That's your husband?!" He asked in disbelief.
Moxxie and Millie snarl at Eddie.
"I figured you for a slut. But, I didn't know you needed dick that bad!" Eddie said before he points at Loona "And you!"
"What?" Loona asked as she looked up from her phone "What about me?"
"Nothing." Eddie said as he crosses arms. "I don't talk to dogs. I'm a cat person."
Loona gives a wide-eyed glare, whines at Eddie with anger, and goes back to looking at her phone.
Eddie's insult towards Loona caused Jaune to growl in anger. His red eyes, glowing, glared into Eddie. His mind was raging at him, telling him to rip the boy to bloody shreds. Yet he managed to stay calm enough to give his own verbal reply.
"Look kid, I know you don't want to be here but insulting my friends is completely uncalled for. So I suggest that you apologize." Jaune said through strained anger.
However, Eddie simply scoffed at Jaune. "Like I'm going to listen to a furry freak like you. Especially one that was getting a handy by the other one a few minutes ago." He said as he pointed to Loona with one hand and made a jerking motion with the other one.
Millie and Moxxie's eyes widened in surprise as they whipped their heads towards Jaune and Loona. The Hellhound and sinner's faces turned red with embarrassment and looked away from the others.
Blitzø on the other hand. "I'm sorry…WHAT?!" He yelled in outrage as he looked at Jaune with murderous intent.
Jaune quickly shrugged it off to glare at Eddie one more time. "You are a real piece of shit, kid." Jaune said as he crossed his arms. As a result this got everyone to say softly in unison softly. "Yeah. He's kind of a piece of shit."
"Whatever you furry freak. I bet that that bitch is probably the only ass you get because you're probably a beta cuck who can't get any pussy from real women." Eddie said.
Jaune's eyes glowed red as result of the insult and let out another, more deeper, growl.
Loona's eyes then widen as she receives a text message.
"Oh, fuck! Guys, I just got a text from our client! Guess he was the right target after all." The Hellhound said.
"Who?" Blitzø asked.
Loona pointed at Eddie. "Him."
Eddie asked in disbelief. "Me?"
"Yup." Loona replied smugly, without looking up.
"They wanted us to kill an actual child?" Blitzø asked, wanting to make sure that he heard Loona right.
That's what they're sayin'." Loona said.
"...Well, Christ on a stick. I guess there is a God." Blitzø said as he drew a flintlock pistol and pointed it at Eddie. However, before he could fire, Jaune quickly got in front of him and moved the Flintlock away from Eddie. Blitzø was about to ask Jaune what the deal was until Jaune turned to Loona.
"Loona, did the client say why he wanted this kid dead?" Jaune said.
"Apparently when they were bleeding out to death, this kid just stood there and mocked them instead of calling the paramedics." Loona replied as she read the details from the client on her phone.
"Well that makes it easier." Jaune said.
"Makes what easier?" Eddie asked, feeling nervous all of sudden. He started to sweat profusely as he felt a murderous Aura being directed at him.
Jaune slowly turned his head to face him, an unnerving smile was plastered on his face while his eyes glowed.
"THIS." Jaune said demonically as he lunged at the human boy.
Eddie yelled out in fear before being mailed to death. The sound of flesh and bone being torn apart soon filled the office. The I.M.P. gang simply watched on in shocked amazement with Loona recording the whole thing on her phone. Blood soon got splattered all over their faces.
LATER
"Y'know, folks? With this company, I really wanted to prove that we're capable of doing the same things anyone else can. Like killing people!" Blitzø said in a voiceover.
Blitzo and Moxxie are shown wearing full hazard gear, dismembering what was left of Eddie's body with a hacksaw and chainsaw respectively. Blood splats on the screen again, then shows the group by a dumpster putting Eddie's body parts in a garbage bag.
"So, from us here at the Immediate Murder Professionals group, we promise to settle your unfinished business or your money... is gone and you're never getting it back, and you can write us a bad review but we'll play dumb to it, because it's Hell and no one fuckin' cares."
As Blitzo does the voiceover, he hugs Jaune, Moxxie, Millie, and Loona, the latter's phone flying out of her hands. Luckily Jaune had managed to catch it and give it back to Loona. The Hellhound smiled at the sinner in thanks.
"Y'know, even though this kid was a target... he's still a child. And it's important that," He said as he wrapped his tail lovingly around the group, "We handle this going forward respectfully."
Jaune raised a brow, but soon dropped it as he and others smiled.
LATER
The scene cuts to a newscast, showing Eddie's mother tearfully holding up a bad drawing of her son. A male news reporter holds a microphone up to her, looking disinterested. The headline on screen says, "Mom sucks at drawing own kid", while the ticker bar constantly reads "There is a missing boy! Yet another missing kid!"
Eddie's mother, who was sobbing, wailed out. "Please! If anyone has seen my little Eddie, please contact us at–" She was cut off as Eddie's bloody body bag suddenly fell into her arms. She then let out a terrified scream. "OHHH!"
Eddie's mother and the news reporter look up in shock as the camera follows their gaze. Blitzo, Moxxie, and Millie are shown looking down on them through a portal.
Blitzo simply smiles and waves at them. "You're welcome!"
The trio disappear in the portal as it closes.
Back in Hell, the imps, Loona, and Jaune stood back as the portal closed.
"Well, that was an…interesting day." Jaune stated, not knowing how to describe what just happened. He then shifted back to his "human" form.
Blitzø placed his hands on his hips and nodded. "Indeed it was." He then whipped his head towards Jaune with a scowl. "Arc, my office now!" Blitzø said as he dragged the sinner to his office before Jaune could respond.
Loona looked at Jaune with a concerned look as her adoptive father dragged him away.
BLITZØ'S OFFICE
"So tell me, what are your intentions with my daughter?" Blitzø asked sternly as he stared down Jaune.
Jaune rolled his eyes at the tall imp. "Blitzø if you're mad at what the kid said then don't be worried about it." He said.
"I will be worried about it! Especially when it involves my Loonie!" Blitzø shouted.
"Look Blitzø, Loona is a grown woman. She's old enough to make her own decisions without you hounding her all the time." Jaune said.
Blitzø sighed in response as he sat down on his chair. He thought about and saw that Jaune had a point.
"Blitz." Blitzø looked at Jaune as the sinner started to speak. "Look I get that you're worried for Loona, all parents should be but I promise you that, if she and I do ever get that serious, I will never hurt her." Jaune said with honesty.
Blitzø stared at Jaune with a serious expression. "Cross your heart and hope to die?" He asked.
"I'll even make a pinky promise too." Jaune said.
"Well then," Blitzø stood up and extended his hand towards Jaune. "I give you permission to date my daughter."
Jaune rolled his eyes but smiled as he shook Blitzø's hand. Suddenly, Blitzø pulled Jaune forward, bringing his face to his own. "But if you ever break her heart, I will fuck you in your sleep!" Blitzø threatened in a whisper.
Jaune stared blankly before replying. "Noted." He replied.
"Anyways, let's head back." Blitzø said as he left the office. Jaune shortly followed after him. Outside was Loona waiting for them, mostly Jaune. Blitzø went off to annoy Moxxie some more.
"So what did he want to talk to you about?" Loona asked.
"Oh you know, the usual 'dad talk'." Jaune said as he leaned against the table.
"Oh, that's cool." Loona said, not sure what to say about that.
"Loona." Jaune began to talk, grabbing the Hellhound's attention. "I want to know if…um…if you wanted to be my girlfriend."
Loona was surprised by this, though her tail started to wag slightly. "Wait, are you serious?" She asked.
"I'm serious." Jaune replied.
Loona smiled. "I'd like to be your girlfriend."
Jaune smiled as he brought Loona in and captured her lips into a kiss. A kiss that Loona was very eager to return.
GOETIA MANOR
Octavia was in her room, reading a copy of Ninjas of Love when suddenly a wave of anger and dread built up inside of her. Her fingers started to grip the cover of her book very tightly.
"Why do I feel like some bitch was taking something from me?" Octavia asked herself as she tried to calm down.
I.M.P. HEADQUARTERS
The new couple soon broke the kiss.
"Want to go on a date tomorrow?" Jaune asked.
Loona smiled. "Sure."
"Awesome." Jaune said with his own smile before he brought Loona into another kiss.
They then spent the rest of the day making out on the table. Much to Blitzø's annoyance and Millie and Moxxie's amusement.
LATER ON AT NIGHT.
Loona was on her phone, browsing for some clothes for her date tomorrow with Jaune. She was by herself in the apartment as Blitzø went out to get some booze. A knock on the door caused the Hellhound to look away from her phone.
She stood up and went to open the door, only to see no one there. Loona looked both ways of the corridor to see who was there. She slightly scowled in annoyance and was about to head back inside until she noticed something.
On the floor was a red gift box covered in a black ribbon that has a logo of a chimera in front of two crescent moons on it with a note attached. Loona raised a brow and picked up the package. She went back inside the apartment, closing the door, and placed the package at the counter.
Loona took the note off the package and read it.
You're welcome - E.
Loona looked confused before she opened the package. Inside was a vial of purple liquid with a label. On the label itself it said; "cure for syphilis."
Loona's eyes widened in surprise and gratitude. She immediately grabbed the vial, opened it up, and downed it in one gulp.
Instantly she feels better, as if the vial had gotten rid of something that should not have been there in her body. Not only that but Loona felt much more energetic and healthy.
"Wow, I feel good." Loona said in joy. The Hellhound grabbed the note once again. "Huh, thanks E." A smile graced her face. She put the note away and prepared to get ready for bed.
To Be Continued.