CHAPTER 104

SERRE-MOI

"Emily, this better be worth waking up at seven, on a Sunday. My only day off for the past two weeks, at that." A very grumpy, sleepy man said, gladly reaching his hand out to grab the coffee that he was just being served.

"I want to check out on that favor you owe me…" Emily shot out her request right away.

She seemed more than awake. He figured this wouldn't happen to be her first coffee.

"I owe you something huge." He reminded her. "And I'm willing to do good on my promise, but…"

"Not 'buts" and no "ifs"!" She looked him straight in the eyes, with determination oozing from her own.

"Are you sure you want to check out on something so small?" He continued his thought anyway.

She hadn't even uttered her request, but he already knew what that might be.

"Yes. Absolutely and 100 % sure!" It didn't even take her a second to think about it. Once again, she just shot it out, like she had been thinking about it already and like there was no space left for doubt. This was what she wanted and there was no changing her mind.

"But, Emily…this is not the kind of a favor you need to be asking of me. You are Unit Chief. Your Unit is all kinds of screwed up right now. Excuse me, but I find your request a bit ridiculous. Rushed, even."

"No. I know what I want and what I want is for you to help me out with this." She shook her head, because in no alternate universe was she ever going to drop it.

"Can we talk about this in a few days? You know, give yourself some time to really think this through…"

"No. I don't need days. I've had years. And my decision, my request, is not going to change." She said firmly.

"But-…"

"No 'buts'!" She cut him off once again. "You didn't even ask what the favor is."

"I didn't need to. I already know."

"So, is that a yes?" She forced a hopeful smile.

"I'm not a magician, Emily. I can't snap my fingers and grant your wishes."

"Neither was I, but I saved your ass out there, didn't I? And, mind you, I risked my own damn life in the process…"

"Oh, that's a low blow and you know it." He winced, thinking of that one night, many years ago, when a very eager Agent had thrown herself in the line of fire, just to drag him out of a place where he'd only ever been able to escape from in a body bag.

"Yes. And I'm desperate here. Please don't make me turn into an asshole who would bribe you until you give me what I want. I'm not that person. Anymore…"

"Emily, you've never been that person." He tried not to smile. He was known as a serious man, with a stern look, one that could make anyone's blood freeze over.

"Yes, I have. And, in a way, I'm always going to be. But that's okay. I've accepted that. I can live with that." Her lips formed a straight line as she spoke.

Some traits of her character were a bit too much for her to accept and handle, but she had no other choice. This was her life – the life of an ex undercover Agent, between one name and the other, with all the lying, pretending and scheming, all the impossible and borderline illegal things she has ever had to do, in order to stay alive, to finish the job.

Emily now liked to live her life, blocking those memories out. She liked to convince herself that she didn't know a Lauren, a Catherine, A Roxanne, a Jessica and a whole bunch of other names, but the harsh reality was that she did, indeed, know them. She had been them. In a way, the things those women did in the past were always going to be part of Emily Prentiss. Naively, she just didn't like to think about that. Living in sweet denial was much better than living with regret and having to deal with the psychological traumas of her past.

Unfortunately, lately she has had to face some past feelings, to suck it up and to be someone else. She invented a new person – another Emily, who was fun, energetic, full of life, spontaneous…and she lived her life now, pretending like this was her new reality.

Little did she know, this new and improved Emily person was not a character – it was rather part of her own character. It was part of who she really was. It wasn't a game and it wasn't a job. It was her – Emily Prentiss, the vulnerable, human side of her she just didn't know that yet.

"You are one incredibly stubborn woman, you know that, right?" He finally gave up and let out a tiny laugh.

They were both in plain clothes, sitting in a diner, outside the FBI property, on a Sunday. They were two civilians. They were friends. He could allow himself a smile or two.

"Yes, I do. Now, back to my request…" She hurried to bring back the topic that interested her.

"This is official government business you're asking me to mess with."

"Yeah. You're an official government employee. And so am I." She had a whole speech ready for him, in case he'd want her to elaborate on that. "So, I don't see why other people cannot be given the same courtesy…the courtesy of holding that title, too?"

"Other people can and will be given the opportunities they deserve." He sighed, knowing his argument was strong, but not strong enough to fool Emily Prentiss.

"Perfect. Now, how about being given the opportunities they want?"

"You realize those papers are locked up in storage, right?"

"Yes." She nodded.

"And you know I must have a damn solid reason to go fetch them from there…"

"Mhm."

"There is also the whole thing where it is not my signature I'd have to put on them, if I changed them…"

"Correct."

"So, what exactly is it that you think I can do for you?"

"Change someone's life. Easy as that." Emily stated calmly.

"And how are you going to meet your budget?"

To that, Emily shrugged. She had all the emotional details of her speech just ready to be poured out to this man, but she had never thought the whole budget situation out.

"See? It's not as easy as just signing a paper."

"Why?" Emily would be damned if she backed up.

"Because even if I did everything you're asking me to do, it has to be his signature, to make it official."

"Then go ask him." She looked and sounded like a teenager, so naïve to think that it would be easy.

"I can't just enter his office and ask him to sign a paper that would change, well, everything…"

"It wouldn't change a damn thing for anyone else, but my team. And my team is okay with the change I am suggesting. So, go ask him." Emily folded her hands in front of her chest and gave him a more stern look now.

"He's never going to approve of this."

"Then ask nicely!" She raised an eyebrow at him and, at this point, he knew he was screwed.

"Emily…you're asking a favor, not from me, but from the Director of the FBI. You do realize the severity of this situation, don't you?"

"Yes!" To each question of his, she replied quickly, sure of her answers.

"Again – it's not me you need this favor from!" He said slowly, making sure Emily would hear and receive those words.

"Fine. Then I need you to fix me an appointment with the Director!" She had balls to come out and say it. Nobody ever managed to just sit with that man, if it wasn't for a very pressing issue.

"I'm his assistant, not his secretary." He stated, taking offense.

"Fine, then tell his secretary to get me an appointment. Preferably before the Academy is over." She rolled her eyes sarcastically.

"He's all booked up for the next month or so."

"How would you know? Thought you weren't his secretary?" She challenged.

"Please stop being smart with me." He winced.

"No, I won't!" She felt good. It felt so damn good to be able to stand up for what she believed, especially to a man of his status.

"I'm saying this as your friend…" He trailed off for a second, taking a long sip of coffee, just to give himself time to word it out properly. "This can blow up in your face."

"Fine. Let it. I can take the heat!" Through the whole conversation, Emily's eyes did not blink. Not even once. Her gaze pierced through him and she spoke with confidence. He admired that about her.

They were going round in circles all the time, but with each argument of his, Emily found a new way to twist the story and get back to what she wanted. And it was painfully obvious she would stop at absolutely nothing, in order to get it. Nothing! Nothing at all. Not even bribing the Assistant Director of the FBI, not even a low blow, not even cashing out on an old favor. Nothing. Emily Prentiss would stop at nothing. She didn't want too many things in life, but when she wanted something, all Hell would break lose before she'd drop it. She'd keep going and she'd give it her all, and more, until her wish would be granted.

"I'm going to ask you one more time-…" He started, but she wasn't in the mood for any further questioning.

"Yes, Ben! This is what I want and this is the favor I want to check out, with you. I am sure of it and never in my life would there be another moment in which I'd ask anything else of you, ever again. Do this for me and we're even. You're done with me, for good."

"No, that's not what I meant, Emily…" He pouted after hearing her words. It sounded like she thought he was feeling obliged to help her out. Like she was a burden to him. Like he couldn't wait to be even, so that she wouldn't hold anything against him anymore.

"I don't care what you meant." Emily sighed.

She was exhausted, tired of hearing 'no'. What was the big deal? All it took was digging up some dusty document and having the most powerful man at the Bureau change…basically everything it said. It was as simple as that, in Emily Prentiss' mind.

"Hey, come on now. We don't have to ruin our friendship over this. Can't you accept that we have different points of view on this?" He pleaded.

Somehow, he had grown to really like her, over the years. He had never felt like he owed her anything. If he ever did anything for her, he'd do it out of the goodness of his heart, not because she had done something for him, in return.

"I'm willing to sacrifice more than just our friendship, in order to get what I want."

"Why is this so important to you?" He checked her behavior. She was now a bit more impatient, a little more emotional.

"It just is, okay?" Her eyes blinked and it was the first sign of weakness she showed.

Yet, it wasn't weakness. It was hope, mixed with a certain doze of desperation.

Emily knew that he was the only man in the world she could count on, for this. And she knew that if he said No, that was it, for her. For them. For the BAU. For her

"I have to take my daughter to the bus station. She's leaving on a journey, with her classmates." He stated after checking what time it was.

"Great. One lucky girl, having someone to back her up and send her off to the journey of her life…"

Oh, Emily's words hit him like a ton of bricks. She knew exactly how to twist someone's words and then throw them right to their heart, paired with a set of daggers.

"Emily…" He started off once again, unsure how he'd finish that phrase.

The metaphor wasn't lost on him.

"Please…" She cut him off, for the last time.

This time her voice was soft, silent, weak.

Her eyes answered the question that he previously wanted to ask her – why was this so important to her. This was personal, he could tell. It wasn't just a spur of the moment kind of a request. It was big, for her.

Ben saw her fiddle with the ring on her finger and her eyes finally darted away and set on the now empty coffee cup in front of her.

The Great Emily Prentiss was vulnerable – that was not something he ever thought he'd witness. She had always been strong, even through her weakness. He had seen her hold back tears, on the field, he'd seen her swallow her own blood, so she wouldn't spit it out and let everyone know that her jaw was now basically dislocated. He'd seen her get shot and drag her foot, ignoring the blood dripping down from it, all while dragging his nearly lifeless body out of a bunker where he would have died in minutes, had she not come back for him when no one else on their assigned team even acknowledged that possibility. He'd seen her bite her lips and block the pain out, not even wincing when things got rough. He'd seen her work her ass off, to get into the BAU and she'd done it with the same kind of passion and determination that she was showing him now, at seven and a quarter, on a Sunday morning, at a roadside Diner, asking him for the impossible.

And yet, through all the years he had known her, he had never seen, or heard of, The Emily Prentiss – vulnerable, asking for a favor that would change multiple people's lives. He'd never seen her eyes shy away during a conversation. Hell, this woman had the most iconic bitch stare during negotiations and he'd often wonder if she was even real. She'd stare down criminals, she'd look them dead in the eyes, with a revolver pressed against her temple, and she'd have the audacity to challenge them, to antagonize them. But never in his whole life had Ben ever imagined he'd one day see The Emily Prentiss ask for something, beg even, with that childlike hope in her eyes, with that voice that cracked a little bit, with that intonation of a bad bitch, but at the same time – the tone of someone whose life depended on getting what they wanted.

He stood up and, on his way to the door, he pat her shoulder twice. He did not say another word and he did not have to. That double pat was more than enough. It was code for "I got your back", out there on the field. Both of them knew it and to Emily this gesture said more than she could have bargained for.


"Good morning!" Angie walked in Emily's office an hour after she had finished talking to Ben.

"Good morning, dear." Emily eyed her up and down.

The girl was panting, as if she had just come from a long run, but she looked awfully put together, in her black pants and Bordeaux smart shirt.

Emily then remembered something and, looking down at her own clothing, she chuckled.

"Oopsie, accidental twinning." Angela laughed, noticing how Emily was wearing basically the same thing – black pants and Bordeaux shirt, a little darker than Angie's shade.

"I'm not mad about it." Emily smiled and motioned with her hand for Angie to take a seat at the other side of her office desk.

"Cool office…" Angie did not sit.

Instead, she let her eyes linger for the longest moment.

Right behind Emily's back, there were a few framed photos. One was of the whole team, as they were now, one was of her with JJ, Morgan and Rossi, whom she considered her closest people and then there was another frame…

Emily shifted uncomfortably when she noticed Angie's eyes inspecting that photo.

"Paris is a huge part of my life…" Emily muttered before Angela would even get the chance to ask about it.

It was weird, two out of three frames contained photos of people and the third one had a commercially available stock photo of a city, situated at the other side of the globe and yet that was what caught Angela's attention.

"It's nice to see you hold on to the memories. A lot of people disregard the things that once made them happy…" Angie walked over and let her finger trail along the frame, which sent shivers down her spine.

"It feels like a different lifetime ago. But I never forgot my time there, the people I was with…the people I lost…" Emily cleared her throat, feeling like a huge lump had formed, preventing her from speaking.

Angie looked away from the frame, only to set her eyes on Emily now.

"What brings you here on a Sunday? It's our day off." Emily continued speaking, because if she did not, then her heart would burst inside her chest.

"You mentioned you had paper work to do today, you know, after the case." Angie weirdly recalled something that Emily had said at the bar, when both of them were on their fifth drink.

"And since this is my week to follow you, I figured…I should, you know, follow you." She added awkwardly, trying not to show just how much she was enjoying her time with Emily.

"Well then, let's get started." Emily smiled and pushed a few papers to the other side of her desk, figuring Angela would sit opposite her.

Wrong.

Angie dragged the chair to Emily's side, intentionally sitting right next to Emily.

Somehow, that made Emily smile. The girl who seemed to be freaked out by human contact, was now going out of her way, just to be closer to her.

"Okay, first thing…how are you with the legal side of the job?" Emily asked, since these papers had to be threaded very carefully.

"Oh, God…" Angie chuckled. "You got me. I suck at it. I've never been a fan of the law."

"Alright. Let's never admit that out loud again, okay?" Emily laughed, nudging Angela and hoping nobody would ever overhear her say something like that.

"Now, these here are the reports. See, this is Rossi's…" She gave Angie a paper that she had just printed out. The team had started working on their reports on the plane and most of them had already finished and e-mailed it to Emily by the morning, even if it was their day off.

"He's always very objective. You can learn a lot from the way he writes about a case. You'll see, with time you'll learn to individualize each team member's signature writing style. It's fun, actually." Emily continued.

"What time?" Angie challenged.

Emily then sighed, realizing that she was so far into her fantasy world that she had let herself forget that this - that day, was the last day she'd have Angela by her side, or anywhere near the BAU office.

"This must be JJ's." Angie quickly went back to analyzing the reports, before Emily would have another meltdown. God knows she has had enough, in front of her.

"Yes, that is correct. She always keeps it formal, giving only the indispensable information and keeping it short and to the point." Emily added.

"Guess years as a media liaison would do that to someone…" Angie shrugged. "She's quite pauciloquent."

"How did you know she started off as liaison?" Emily raised an eyebrow. "And what the Hell is paicilo-…what did you just say?" She added in confusion, not even remembering half of the word that Angela had used.

"You people let more information out than what you realize." Angie said calmly, pretending like she had just overheard it, randomly.

"Pauciloquent. That's a person of few words, someone who doesn't say much or who, when giving a speech, gives a very short one." Angie explained.

"The antonym would be bloviate. That's someone who talks for a long period of time or who would inflate their story to make themselves sound better. It also refers to someone whose words are empty and have no meaning, so there's really no good connotation to that word." Angie continued speaking since Emily was now quiet as a mouse.

"Okay, Dr. Reid 2.0." Emily laughed at these random words that she had never heard before in her life.

The first word might have referred to JJ, but the second one sounded a bit more like Angela, without the bad connotation part. When Angela spoke, her stories often sounded exaggerated, she had a way of raising her voice, much like an actress would, in order to point out the good parts of the story, or to simply grab everyone's attention and to make them listen to everything. Some of the things she said seemed quite made-up, but knowing a little more about her now, there was no doubt in Emily's mind that this girl had really once made a handstand on top of an ice-cream truck, or that she had pretended to be a stuck up Royalty figure, only to get into a private party in Monaco. It sounded fake, but Emily could see Angela do all of that, and more. She was a Daredevil, she'd do as she pleased and she'd get what she wanted. Emily admired that about her. She wished she could be more like Angela, especially now – an hour after the talk she had with Ben, begging for what she wanted.

"Oh, speaking of Reid, this must be his!" Angie's eyes glowed as she spoke of him, holding a paper.

"You like him, don't you?" Emily looked at the way Angie was now intently reading every word on that piece of paper.

"Yes. A lot! He's so incredibly smart and he is not ashamed to admit it. I wish more young people were like him."

"Yeah, I wish more young people would stop pretending to be someone they're not and they'd allow themselves to show others what they're really worth…" Emily rephrased Angie's statement, shooting her a glance.

To those words, Angie did not reply. But that quiver of her lower lip showed that she had received them, loud and clear. Once again, The Emily Prentiss…the Queen of Metaphors, had risen.

An hour later, they were done going through everyone's report and Emily moved on.

"Now, this is my final report." She gave Angie a paper, three times longer than any of her other colleague's.

"Wow…"

"Yeah, being Unit Chief comes with a lot of hard work." Emily winked and somehow Angie realized that Emily was doing her job, because she liked it, not because she had to.

"You misspelled idiosyncratic." She pointed out.

Emily went over the whole phrase again, three times, before she looked up at Angela quizzically.

"Don't you spell that with an 'i'? She asked.

"Nope, it's with a 'y', according to the SAT's official standards."

"Uhh, what would I do without you?" Emily was already searching for the file on her computer, so she'd change it and print it again. "And to think I graduated freaking Yale…" She added, rolling her eyes at the fact that a 23 year old girl was giving her Yale diploma a run for its money.

"I dunno. Ask yourself that question tomorrow." Angie's calm answer made Emily shiver.

She disliked being reminded of the end of this week. She was done waiting for special weeks in her life to finish. And, this time, she'd be damned if she let this…all of this, whatever it was; get ruined!

"You have an impressive mastery of English." Emily pointed out.

"I'm American…hello?" Angie chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah, but still…"

"If I had to adumbrate it, I'd blame it all on my upbringing. I was told, from an early age, to be curious about life and everything around me."

"Guess you took that way too literally." Emily laughed.

For this whole week, Angela had not stopped asking questions, both to her and to the rest of the team, curious about anything, no matter if it was important to the job or not.

"Adumbrate – to describe roughly or give the main points or summary of something." Angie winked at Emily, sensing that she might not have understood the meaning of that word either.

"You are just something else, Angela Hunter…" Emily rolled her eyes, this time playfully.

Sometimes she felt like Angela was five, and still asking all the questions in the world.

Other times she felt like she was talking to someone her own age, eloquent, professional and so incredibly driven.

"Keep going and that would be blandishment - flattery intended to persuade." Angie smirked.

"Now you're just showing off, you little nerd!" Emily nudged the girl again and she made her chuckle.

"You know, people switch back and forth between calling me a nerd and a geek, but I don't think they even know the difference."

"Why do I have the feeling you're about to tell me all about it…?" Emily had spent enough time with Reid to know when a geeky downpour was going to happen. And Angela was no different.

"A nerd is someone who is passionate about learning, being smart, academic in general. A geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations and interactions." Angie shot out quickly.

"So, you're most definitely not a dork." Emily laughed so hard.

Clearly, this girl had no problem with her social interactions, just as long as people didn't try to touch her.

"But I'm kind of torn between a nerd and a geek. I mean, I like the sound of geek more, but then again, I don't limit my fields of interest. I want to know more, about everything."

"Okay, how about we just call you a weirdo?" Emily kept on laughing.

"Oh, I like that! I've also been called a freak, but that was, uh, under very different circumstances…" Angie blushed a little.

"God, no! No! Please, stop talking." Emily put her hands on her ears and shook her head, feeling somewhat uncomfortable to have Angela hint on something so personal and intimate.

Angie smirked and busied herself with the papers once again.

"What's that?" She asked curiously, grabbing the next piece of paper that was in Emily's paper folder.

"That's confidential…" Emily took the paper back and put it away safely.

"Fine." Angie was upset, she hated confidential things that she was being denied access to. As boring as they were, she wanted to see them all.

"What now?" She asked, waiting for their next adventure.

"Now, it's time for the fun part. And by fun part, I mean the part that I wish I had a drink in hand for…" Emily rolled her eyes, placing more papers on the table. She hated this part of the job.

"I heard you keep the good Bourbon in the third drawer." Angie smirked, pointing behind Emily.

"Where on Earth did you hear such a thing!?" Emily gasped. She hadn't expected that anyone would ever learn about that little habit of hers.

"People talk, Emily…" Angie played hardball and enjoyed every second of Emily, freaking out.

"Just as long as it was my people who said it…" Emily shrugged.

Everyone at the BAU knew exactly where the good alcohol was – third drawer, central desk in Emily's office and top drawer, left desk in Rossi's office.

"Yup, don't worry." Angie smiled, not wanting to say that it had been Garcia to have blabbed about Emily's alcohol stash, just days ago.

And then again, if a secret got spilled at the BAU, everyone knew it was Garcia's fault.

Emily then read a few things out loud to Angela and showed her which parts of the papers had to be filled in and how. She let Angela come up with the text, after she had been watching Emily do so for over an hour, and Angela was kind of good at it. At times she completely lost her train of thought and Emily could tell that the juridical side of the job was clearly not her forte, but she appreciated the hard work the girl was putting into this.

"Fine, now what?" Angie said, two hours and a half after she had first walked in Emily's office that morning.

"Whatever you want." Emily stood up, placing the newly filled in files neatly in their respective folders and preparing for them to be sent to her Superiors on Monday morning.

"Wait, is that it?" Angie frowned.

"Yes, that was it. And please don't make it sound like it's an easy job." Emily laughed, while sticking her wallet in her handbag and grabbing her water bottle from one of her desk drawers.

She noticed Angie's curious eyes as soon as she opened that drawer. Inside, Emily kept her water bottle, her coffee mug, a few coasters and a fork, for all the take away food she had been consuming lately.

"See something you like?" Emily smirked.

Angie was basically drooling over something.

"What? Nope. Just curious…"

"You can have it, if you want…" Emily pointed to the drawer, hoping it wouldn't have been the fork that Angie was after. It was her most prized possession in her office.

"For real?"

"For real!" Emily nodded and watched Angie's hand grab the mug. She had kind of figured it would be what Angela would like the most.

Angie already had her FBI Academy branded water bottle to show off with, but those coffee mugs were not only branded FBI, but had the BAU logo on them, too. Only members of Emily's team had those mugs, with an inscription of their name underneath the logo. So, Angie's new coffee mug now said Prentiss.

"Like, really?" Angie felt the need to have one more reassurance, now that she was holding the precious mug in her hands.

"Like, really!" Emily smiled wide and was thankful to her lack of laziness the last time she had drank from that mug. She remembered actually washing it properly before chucking it into the drawer, unlike other times when she'd put it in there with some coffee, still left on the bottom of it.

"Thank you so much, Emily Prentiss!" Angie suppressed the urge to squeal.

She was very expressive, especially when she was happy. And that did not happen too often in her life, so she had never really had the chance to teach herself how to contain her positive emotions. Unlike the negative ones – in which case Angela was perfectly capable of putting on a poker face and keeping up with the game, resting completely neutral, even if on the inside she was fuming.

"You are welcome, Angela Hunter." At that moment, Emily realized one more thing. One thing that she had to get off her chest, but not before she'd initiate the conversation from where it all started…

"So, it's Sunday now. We had seven days to figure something out, remember?" She said softly.

"Mhm…"

"Mhm, really?" Emily raised an eyebrow unhappily, just to mess with Angie.

Had Angela not learned her lesson – not to throw Emily's favorite half-assed unemotional reply in her face, when asked a question?

"Have you figured your issue out?" Angie asked, refusing to go first, if this was yet another emotional conversation to be starting.

"I suppose so. I mean, it took me years to get myself in this mess, so it would hardly only take me a week to get it all sorted out. But I feel like I'm coming out of this seven-day cleanse with a much more clear vision in mind." Emily shared.

"That's really good. I'm happy for you." Angie flashed her the most innocent smile, but with Emily, it did not work.

Her attempt to make this all about Emily, had flanked. She didn't need to be asked the question vocally – Emily's eyes were screaming at her, in their own way.

"Fine." Angie sighed, giving up on acting stupid. It never worked with Emily anyway. "I guess I have a more clear idea for my own issue, as well." She replied the question that had remained unasked.

"And, what about those people from your past? Have you figured out if you want them in your future, as well?" Emily asked curiously, almost impatiently, still with the same childlike hopeful face that she had early that morning, when begging Ben for a favor.

"Yes. I mean, I think I have…"

"What's the verdict then?" Emily was on the edge of her seat and Angie could tell.

"It's a very personal matter. No offense, but I'd rather be letting them know, in private. Personally. Without involving others in this whole mess." Angie shrugged, wanting Emily Prentiss nowhere near the drama with her inner daemons.

Emily gulped. The way Angie spoke made it sound like she had something bad to say to the other person and that was not what Emily had hoped the outcome of that week would be. Clearly, Angie was not going to say another word in regards, so Emily had to drop it and to hope and pray that this other person in Angie's life wouldn't be hurt by Angie's decision.

"I understand…" Emily muttered.

But no, she did not understand. She did not want to understand. She also did not want Angela to turn into an Emily Prentiss 2.0, at least as far as leaving people hurt was concerned.

"Do you have any paper I could use?" Angie now felt an uncontrollable urge to start writing that communication, as soon as she had a moment to herself.

"Yeah, there's blank paper in the printer…" Emily pointed to the machine which was near Angie's seat.

"How about those papers?" Angie pointed at a bunch of white papers, with the BAU stamp and Emily's name and signature on them. They seemed like blank canvass for future formal communications between Emily and someone else.

"Uh, yeah, I guess you could use those…But there's my name on them…" Emily said, confused.

"That's okay. I don't mind them knowing about Emily Prentiss." Angie smiled and, a second later, saw how Emily handed her a whole bunch of branded paper with one hand, while the other one found its way on top of Angie's hand, resting on the desk.

"And I don't mind them knowing about me, either." Emily reassured her, with another genuine smile.

"Speaking of you…" Angie trailed off. "I mean, of Emily Prentiss…" She corrected herself, realizing this was her first time she had called Emily – you.

"Mhm?" Emily urged her to speak, if not because of curiosity, then because her heart was now beating faster than it had, with Richard. For all the different reasons, of course.

"I think Emily Prentiss is an exceptional person. I've spent a week with her, surrounded by people who worship her and only speak highly of her, both as a friend and as their Boss. And I think she has balls. I'm sure Unit Chief is not where it stops, for Emily Prentiss. She would do amazing things in life. She already has!" Angie suddenly felt her throat was dry.

Emily grabbed a water bottle and handed it to her, waiting patiently for her to take a sip before she continued.

"I guess it's hard to find such amazing people, to be surrounded with. And Emily Prentiss is lucky. I get it now…I get why she had to go through everything. It was worth it. Everything she had ever lost, it was for a good cause. I just hope she would allow herself to be happy, with what she has now, because she deserves it. All of it. All of them." Angie gulped, looking out the window of Emily's office, figuratively checking out the bullpen, even if it was now empty.

"But Emily Prentiss is never going to be happy, knowing what she has lost…" Emily whispered.

"But it wasn't really Emily Prentiss who lost it, was it?" Angie nearly choked on her words.

"No. It was not."

"From where I stand, Emily Prentiss has only ever gained. Things. People. Memories…" Angie once again threw in a connection to a previous conversation they had had.

"Angela Hunter, one could use many names, hide behind many characters…" Emily kept her voice cool, because if she let herself show emotion, she knew for a fact she'd lose it.

"But it's the same heart, beating inside. The same eyes, that see the world. The same lips that utter lies are the same lips that quiver…just like yours are doing, right at this moment…" Emily brought her hand to Angie's chin for a second. "Lips that feel the saltiness of those tears that we inevitably shed, no matter who we are, no matter who we pretend to be. The heart hurts just the same."

Angie realized that Emily's other hand had never moved from where she had put it earlier – on top of hers.

"But I-…" Angie opened her mouth, but Emily saw tears in her eyes. She did not want her to cry. Not for her.

"Shh!" Instinctively, Emily pulled her in for a hug.

"It's okay. Take your time." She said, preventing Angie from letting a downpour of words hit her. She knew the girl would regret those words later on. She wasn't ready.

"Whenever you want, I'm always here for you, do you hear me, mon précieux bijou?" Emily's voice changed completely. It was soft, silky, emotional.

She wanted to tell Angela a million different things, yet things all from the same kind. And yet, for some reason, she found herself having to censor her words, to hold back her emotions, to pretend…just like she had done years ago, as Lauren, as Roxy, as Catherine and as a bunch of other made up names, none of whom was The Great Emily Prentiss – the woman who graduated Yale with honors and yet found it so extremely difficult to put her feelings into words, as if English was a foreign language for her.

Angie nodded, holding in a breath and holding back tears. She then found it in her to smile, even if it was obvious how forced it was. At least she was trying.

Emily's next realization was that saying things in French felt about a million times easier. Her last couple of words had just rolled off her tongue and they felt so damn freaking good! It felt like no one could understand, even if there was literally no one out there to overhear them anyway. It felt special, like it was her own little secret language with Angela.

"J'adore ton sourire. Je penserai toujours à toi. Tu me rends heureux." Emily then tried being a bit more eloquent, in French.

Yes, she didn't want anyone else to ever hear those words. Anyone but the girl behind Angela Hunter's eyes.

"Tu me manques…" Angie dared to utter, a tone barely above a whisper, finding it much easier to speak up in French as well.

"Je sais…" Emily broke the hug, just to be able to have a good look at Angela.

"Serre-moi…" Angie pleaded, hating the distance between them.

Emily obliged. She could never deny Angela. She could never wrong her. She could never resist the urge to hug her, anyway, even if Angela was not practically begging for it, like right then and there, at that very moment.


AUTHOR'S NOTE:

I usually translate the foreign languages, in indirect speech. However, this time I needed the French to remain a secret...a mystery at first 'read', as the whole reason the girls switched to French was so that nobody would understand them. For the more curious readers - it can easily be Google Translated :)!

REVIEW REPLIES:

"Guest" Hello, nice to hear back from you again :) Hmm, the Cheetos thing was about JJ...but I like your theory! Doyle though...woah he hasn't even been mentioned much...same goes for the Ambassador. Yet, nothing is impossible! Keep looking for clues :) And thank you for taking the time to review, I appreciate it a lot! Stay safe and hope to hear from you again, as I'm curious where your theory will go, given the future clues in chapters :)!

"rmpcmfan" Hello :) I despise the sight of a drunk girl (so unclassy!) and Angela is supposed to be super wise with things like alcohol. However, I let her slip now so she can open up and show some more raw truth, rather than the shell she's hiding behind. Same goes for Emily. The storytelling was impossible without both of them intoxicated, as they are both super private and secretive, especially about their feelings/fears. It was either getting them drunk or high/drugged, but neither Ems nor Angie would ever touch substances (and I do not condone that), so I used a few cocktails to let them loose :P

JJ is in a very vulnerable place right now - at odds with Will, with one child expelled from school and the other one with a broken hand. Plus, her best friend is showering someone else with the love and affection that JJ needs now. She's overreacting and she knows it, that's why she isn't being vocal about it and she ignores Angela altogether. JJ hates stirring drama, so she's quietly in her corner, on her own now.

You are my source of info on big corporations and budget cuts, lol! I haven't even thought of the salary gapping option! I may play with that later on, even though I have written something similar in a future chapter. Thank you for the idea! Also...the BAU will get an intern/new Agent when Hell freezes over and then burns through the ice once again! Keep in mind that this depends on ONE sole person and you will soon hear their thoughts about that request. Let's just say that this is the time for Emily to be a Prentiss and to scheme her little bitchy heart out, lol!

Good job for the "Monkey" reference, Detective ;)

"Ducksdragonfly" Hi :) I enjoy fun, carefree, relaxed and slightly drunk Emily too! I wish we saw more dorky scenes between the Agents on TV, so I'm creating my own inside jokes and silly moments. I don't believe they are all work, no play, the entire time. They must goof around, to deal with the tension of their job!
Hmm it would definitely be extremely hard for someone (Emily) to get something they want (Angela on the team) when someone else (basically the entire FBI!) is looking down on her and especially the Brass who seem to despise her guts! Not to mention - it is legally impossible for the BAU to welcome an intern after the team sent out JJ's budget cuts proposal (the one Emily was then so upset about). We'll see. Emily is crazy, so expect nothing but a mess of screaming and scheming, lol! Right now it seems like the only person who truly cares about Angela's placement of choice is Emily...the others feel bad that Angie won't be around, but they aren't being too vocal/active about it.
There will be some more Dan and Ben in the next chapters. One of the main characters may or may not have a bit of a psychological breakdown...or a childish tantrum lol. You just sit tight and wait for the updates ok? :)
Side note: check your inbox. I replied a few days ago, but then I received the same exact msg as your last one. The website sometimes bugs and it re-sends stuff. Check my reply because now it is hidden above your double msg :)!