Chapter 25: Oh the Horrible, Vile Things We Do

My lunges ached a little bit - or perhaps that was my heart. There was a delicious soreness in my chest that I wanted to sink into, the kind of pain that made you feel alive. I stared up into the blue depths of his eyes, watching as the silver mixed like mist that was playing along the surface of a lake. His eyes churned, changing in a second, and I thought for a moment that I wanted to stay here and just stare into them. See what kind of tides would greet me from moment to moment like a lightkeeper watching the everchanging oceans.

"Could I -" My tongue fumbled the words, shyness burning my cheeks. My fingers picked a bit at the strings of his boots, his eyes attentive, twinkling with amusement as he leaned a bit closer, unwilling to allow me to the reprieve of looking away. "Could we stay here for a bit longer?"

The blue overcame the gray - the sea finally reaching up to grasp at the stormy sky. His lips curved into a delighted smirk. "Now, how could I say no when you ask so sweetly?"

Something hot burned up my spine at his words, my breath bursting from my lunges as his nose bumped into mine. His eyes twinkled with barely contained mischief, tracking the blush that heated my cheeks. Fili's hands curled under my arms, lifting me slightly until his arms could circle my waist. Any air that I had left me as he lifted me, my heart rabbiting inside of my chest.

"You don't - I can get up by myself," I hissed, the wide splay of his hands along my waist burning through my clothes. My whole body ached as he adjusted me, my thighs parting instinctively to wrap around his waist as he settled me down into his lap.

My whole world narrowed down to him, his head tipping back as he stared up at me with a heavy-lidded smirk, his hair ruffled slightly in the wind as it slipped across his back. He was unbearably handsome, his shoulders strong and broad beneath my fingertips, his chest thick with muscles from training and fighting against my breasts. His hands which had been grasping my waist, pressed down into the dip of my back, running slow, hypnotic circles.

"I didn't mean to make you think that you couldn't," he whispered to me, and I found myself swaying forward, drawn in by the soft rasp of his voice. My eyes dipped to the softness of his lips, his canines peeking out as he kept that smile in place.

"I think you like hauling me around like a sack of potatoes," I breathed, only half aware of what I was saying. His hand moved, one dragging up my spine to press into my shoulders while the other played along my belt, toying with the fabric there before finally dragging to the swell of my ass. My whole body lit, burning and aching, and rolling over itself as my skin tingled. Like every cell in my body was begging for more, more, more, more. I gulped down a breath, my fingers playing unconsciously with the collar of his shirt, grazing the smooth skin of his throat.

His lids lowered at the touch, his breath slipping out in a long sigh as my other hand slid from his shoulder, pressing into the hard lines of his shoulders, the muscles running in hard bands down his back.

"I wouldn't want you to think that I wasn't fully aware of how capable you were to stand on your own two feet," he whispered. I barely heard what he said, too caught up in the way that those words buzzed along my tongue. That's why I gasped when his hands clasped around my waist once more, and he hauled me off of his lap once more. His face remained close, his eyes sparkling up as I stared at him in bewilderment. "And I don't like hauling you around. I like the feel of your skin against mine."

My feet landed decidedly on the rock, his hands vanishing as he leaned back against where he sat, palms going to prop himself up. He gave me a lazy smile, his body relaxed into the languid pose of a prince with too much time on his hands. But his eyes were all fire as he stared at me, darkening and burning like embers in the pits of a great fire.

I frowned at him, glancing down at the few feet of space between us, my skin suddenly cold. I scowled. "What did you do that for?"

He grinned. "To reassure you that I had the utmost faith in my princess' strength of character."

I scowled harder. "Don't call me that."

His brows furrowed as if he was contemplating something before he gave a decisive nod. "You're right. You're more like a Queen. My Queen." He gave me a charming flash of teeth as I spluttered, utterly mortified and terrified by the thought. "Although I would say that we should leave all of that to my uncle for a bit. It's taxing enough being a prince."

"I don't-" I choked, floundering. He said the most outrageous things. "I wouldn't-" I searched for words to properly illustrate how out of the creek what he had just uttered was. He might as well have told me that he had made some wings from twigs and leaves and that tomorrow we would try to fly the rest of the way to the mountain. "You cannot possibly be serious."

His eyes shifted, his whole entire face hardening with deadly determination. "Oh, but I am." His voice slipped, darkening to a tone that slithered along my skin like the point of a knife. "I am courting you - very seriously, I might add. That means that my title is yours. You deserve the same if not better respect and honor than I-"

My lips opened to protest, breath already hot as it burned up my throat. The hard look he gave me was enough to make any of those words die.

"And you will receive it." He didn't sound like he had any doubt of that fact.

I couldn't help the vile truth, though, my fingers splaying in subjugation. "But I am a half-"

"Do not call yourself that." I jerked at the venom in his tone, the way his muscles bunched as he leaned forward, staring up at me with such hatred that I felt like cowering back. It was the truth, though. I wasn't - I would never be a true dwarf. Beards were a sign of honor in our people, and I didn't have one. It was such a glaring truth that no one would ever be able to overlook it. My elven blood was recognizable from any distance, from any light. My breath felt heavy in my lungs, choking.

Silence swelled between us, growing harsher, until Fili let out a long breath, running a hand through his hair. His hand reached out, circling my wrist, gentling and tugging me forward. I still couldn't find the courage to look at him, my teeth clenched together. I wanted to fight back. It did neither of us any good to delude ourselves with falsehoods. He deserved better. He deserved -

His thumb gently nudged my chin upwards until I had no choice but to take in his hard gaze. Slowly, he tugged me until I was positioned between his splayed legs, the hand that was holding my wrist releasing me for a moment before gently cupping the back of one of my thighs.

The gray in his eyes was more pronounced now, his gaze taking in the tense tilt of my lips, the pained pinch to my eyes. Finally, he spoke, his words whispered so that only I could hear him. "What will it take to allow you to see yourself the way I do?"

I didn't answer, unsure. It wasn't… It wasn't a bad thing to know your place. It wasn't a bad thing to know what others would see in you. Know how other dwarves would view a halfling sitting on a throne beside a prince. Slowly, I worked around words, opening my mouth a few times as I felt the swell of words in my throat and then felt them fade all the same. Fili watched it all, his gaze attentive. "I - I know what others will think- They will see…"

His eyes blazed up at me, his teeth flashing as he growled out a breath. His words were low and rough when he finally spoke, his fingers leaving my chin to cup me lightly by the nape as if he wanted to make sure that I heard his next words. "Does that make you any less of a princess? Of a Queen? What other imbeciles think - what they'll whisper in their sad little incompetent circle of idiot friends? How does their idiocy reflect at all on your crown?"

My heart leaped at the conviction in his voice, the hatred in his eyes that wasn't directed at me but at the imaginary foes, I had created. His hand tightened on the back of my thigh, tugging me a bit closer until his chest pressed to the front of my thighs and abdomen.

"You are my Queen," he hissed out, his eyes churning with wind-tossed oceans and thunderstruck clouds. "Even if we didn't have a throne. Even if we lived in a shack. I would bow at your feet every single day. Because you deserve to be worshipped. You deserve to be put above everyone and everything - for me. I don't care what others think. I don't care what those who are so inept that they would judge you off of who your parents are, off of the way you look - I don't fucking care what people like that would say. Their opinion is useless, and whatever power they hold would be just as insignificant."

My heart swelled to an almost painful size, beating out of my chest until I swore that every breath took it crashing into him. I was growing to think that sometimes there weren't enough words to properly illustrate the love that I found with Fili. When he said these things when he looked at me with such earnest rage - all for me -

I crashed into him, my fingers clawing into his hair with an urgency that stunned me. A moan slips from my lips, his mouth immediately opening beneath mine as he licks the sound from my tongue. His fingers dig into my thigh, flexing for a moment before a grunt rumbles through his chest, and he drags me back to his lap, and I fall into him, my thighs circling his waist again.

"You're beautiful," he groans, words hot against my lips and my heart swells again, my whole body feeling too small for the sudden largeness. His hands press harder into my thighs, dragging up and then down until he's able to tug me closer. His tongue sweeps into my mouth, dancing with my own as if he can't help himself, and I follow him, fingers digging into his back as I try and pull him tighter to him. Fili groans again, sounding pained as he tugs himself away, his breath ragged. His eyes are a bit hazy as he stares up at me, drinking me in like he can't believe he has me here like he still isn't sure I'm really a breath away. "We should stop."

"Stop," I repeat, confused. My fingers itch, and I can't resist dragging my hands up the strong line of his back, curling my fingers around the hard line of his throat, the tips of my fingers delving into the hair at his nape. My whole body ached, a low fire starting low in my gut. "I don't want to stop."

A foul curse in Khuzdul tore from his lips as I gave into the urge to let my teeth sink into the delicate skin of his throat, his hips jerking into me with a groan. I followed the smooth skin up, pulling back to trace over the smooth circle of his ears. His skin is slightly salty, fresh, and clean from the stream that we washed in, and the way that he groans vibrated along my lips and down my throat, shivering in my chest. I want to gobble him up, drink him down, and never let him go. My prince. My wonderful, senseless prince who read my letters and stared at maps, tracking my muddy steps through caverns and human villages and ditches and dams.

"I don't want to stop either," he grits, his hands gripping my ass suddenly and my leggings are frayed and thin, and his hands are so rough, the callouses so thick that I can feel them scrape against my skin as he drags my skirt up. His breath is fast and hard against my throat, and my most intimate parts are pressed against him, and I can feel how hard he is through the thick material of his trousers. More, more, more, my head buzzes dizzily, and I can't help inching my hips forward. I was a live flame; metal heated too hot to the point that I vibrated with it, my skin tingling, aching for more.

His head dipped, eyes focusing on where our hips rocked together, and I didn't know why that made my whole world darken, every cell in my body catching fire. His eyes were dark endless seas as they stared down at where his hands were digging into the plump skin at my hips and ass, where our hips rocked and joined.

His eyes finally drifted upward, and he caught the reddening of my skin as I caught him staring. Those eyes of his lit a bit, his lids going heavy as he gave me a slow smirk and leaned forward to drag his teeth along the thin material over my breasts. A squeak burst from my lips as his tongue laved the points of my breasts, the material sticking to my nipples as he pulled away. My whole body throbbed, my fingers tightening in his hair as he leaned forward again to pay the same attention to my other breast.

"But I don't want our first time to be in the middle of the forest while we're on the run from orcs." His words vibrated along the sensitive peaks of my breasts, the feeling running directly to my pussy and making me choke back a moan. His fingers dug into my hips, stopping the desperate roll of my hips as I tried to get even a fraction more friction. Tingles shivered up my spine, the far off feeling of something worth chasing tingling through my abdomen. I was listening to him through a shroud, my focus shifting further and further to the ache between my thighs. But he was so much stronger in this moment, the muscles of his forearms and shoulders rolling and tensing beneath me as he controlled my movements. I bit back a curse, tugging on his hair until he was forced to stop laving my breasts with languid attention, that hazy smile still tugging at his lips as he let me crane his head back.

"More," I whispered in our shared language against his lips, our tongues meeting in a sloppy kiss as he shifted, and I felt his thighs brace beneath me before he was rolling his hips in a way that made a whimper burst from my lips. "Fili, please."

Something hot, made of hard edges and feral need, flashed through his eyes - something that made my whole body tip closer to the impending end that both of us wanted. But it was there and gone before I could catch sight o fit for too long - that tight control he kept in place, leashing whatever emotion I was about to let consume both of us.

"You could get me to do horrible, vile things, Tori," he finally whispered, the muscles in his throat cording as he stopped the desperate tilt of my hips, a pained groan rolling from the depth of his chest. His teeth gritted, and I suddenly had the irrational urge to press him closer to whatever ledge he had just been tempted to jump from. His eyes were hard as he finally looked back up at me. "But I don't want our first time to be before I speak to your brothers. I don't want it to be in a place where we have to be quiet and worry about someone finding us."

I feel the hot press of words start to form in my throat, my hands fisting angrily in his hair before I can stop myself. The smile that he gives me is pure charming nerve. He can see the angry words just waiting to be hurled at him, frustration building from the slowly cooling embers of my own desire.

"I could strangle you, Fili of Du-" I start, fuming, raging, absolutely burning as I glare down at him.

Throwing a tantrum. Oh, but damn it all - I was so frustrated. I lurched away from his grip, yanking myself away from his touch even though it physically pained me - the delightful burning of my skin cooling uncomfortably as I huffed out a breath, trying not to stomp my feet in irrational fury. I caught the darkly agonized tilt of his lips, the self-loathing smirk that curled his lips as he watched me fume as I stood in front of him. The defined muscles of his chest rolled as he leaned back, balancing his weight on his palms. He was all dark amusement, burning intensity as he stared at me, and in that moment, I realized that he was only a hair's breadth away from the lack of control that governed me at the moment.

And to all the gods, I wanted to destroy that.

I leaned forward slowly, watching as his eyes darkened further, the blues and silvers shivering away to pure ebony as I drew my hands to where his knees splayed wide. Whatever amusement that had held him before vanished, replaced completely by something almost feral. His eyes tracked my hands as I dragged my palms slowly up his thighs, the material of his pants rough against my palms.

"Tori." There was a sharp warning in his words. I ignored it, a breath shivering from me as I leaned a bit closer until our breath became one, his head tipping to the side as I kept the short distance between us. Heat shivered along my spine, the cold feel of my shirt against my breasts a pointed reminder.

"It's a shame that I couldn't persuade you, my prince," I breathed, my palms dragging to his inner thighs, the muscles there flexing as my fingertips grazed along the impressive bulge just beneath the confines of his trousers. His breath hitched against my lips, every muscle in his body seeming to tense as he… waited. "I think that you could persuade me to do… horrible… vile… things too." My head tilted, mimicking his own as he tipped a bit closer, and I drifted back, keeping barely out of reach. His eyes blazed, burning me. "Such a shame."

And with that I pulled away, his eyes burning into me as he let out a harsh snarl. If I were anyone less versed with Fili, I would have been afraid that he was about to tackle me. As it was, the foul flurry of curses that flew from his lips was enough to assure me of his location. I grinned, my own fury only slightly appeased as I collected my pack and made my way quickly back to where my brother's and the rest of the party roared.

Safe for a moment, this night was one for celebration. The fire was high and blazing, the game that we had caught burning merrily on a stick and in a stew. The hobbit sat just beside the wizard, grinning happily as Bofur and Bombur mimed some exaggerated scene from their youth. My brothers sat to the side, talking quietly with Kili and Thorin.

That made me pause, unsure, as I lingered at the edge of the circle. Kili was the first to catch me staring, his eyes uncharacteristically serious before he gave me a slow, tentative smile. One at a time, they all looked up, and all of the desire that I had felt before died a quick and violent death as anxiety roared to the surface.

Dori caught my eyes, his face cast in tight lines as he waved me over. I felt more than heard Fili come up behind me, his hair ruffled in a way that suggested he had been tugging at it in a bid for control before he had made his way back. His chest brushed my shoulder as he caught where my eyes were trapped. He let out a slow breath, his hand brushing along my back.

"Come on, amrul." I gulped in a breath at the soft tickle of his words along my ear, darting a quick glance up at him. In his eyes, there was still a glimmer of the desire that I had seen before but mostly, I saw the tinge of a softer emotion - something that made his lips tip up a bit in reassurance.

"We could go back in the woods?" I whispered hopefully, and one side of his lips tipped up in a smirk, his teeth flashing.

His lips brushed over my cheek as he dragged my side into his chest, his hand curling possessively around my hip. "It's best that we're not alone right now, amrul." His smile was all wickedness against my cheek. "Besides, I would like to get this part out of the way sooner so that we can have more time for the fun bits."

So with a chaste kiss to my cheek, he led me to where the Prince, King, and, worst of all, my brothers sat.


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