A flash of light right before my eyes...
I remember seeing that inhumane thing breach the space itself - tearing through thin air as if it has been in deep slumber within a void no human can reach. It's a stag with elegant horns twisting into a spiral as it branches out. Gaping golden veins around its body makes the flow of its glittering ichor visible to human eyes. That creature is completely bleached white and its blank golden marble-like eyes scan its surroundings.
Don't live in the memories, Bismarck...
At that point of time, both my body and rigging have been scarred from fending off enemies far worse than the Sirens. Even the mighty steel beast I wield has a large gaping scar engraved on it as a reminder on the last clash with my fallen sister.
Bismarck...!
A voice rings into my head. It repeatedly calls out to me, but all of my senses are forced to relive the memory of how most of humanity, Sirens and kansens alike, are wiped out when an unknown will deemed us unnecessary. The Sirens believed it's just a legend, but the herald manifested right before us.
Ugh...I hate it when this happens...
Just as I reach out by sheer instinct, another force wraps every corner of my body. It coils around me like a snake to its prey, but it's not suffocating me.
"...!"
Right before I know it, my feet are off the ground and the rest of my body is instantly yanked out of my current spot. It's as if I'm flying back at an insane speed that everything goes blurry then my vision is surrounded by pitch black darkness.
"Welcome back to the real world, sleepyhead" Welt's familiar demeaning tone greets me
"You should have taken it easy" Ash calmly tells her
I blink a few times since I can clearly tell I'm lying on a polished wooden floor and inside some sort of luxurious lobby. Silky red and golden curtains adorn the walls around me and a regularly maintained grand piano takes the spot in the middle of the room.
"..."
As for the two, they're sitting right next to each other on a spacious couch. Seeing them in one place and beside each other makes it difficult to distinguish who is who at first glance. Other than their choice in clothing, Welt has an arrogant, awfully calm, and somewhat childish personality that anyone could tell she's not Enterprise the moment she opens her mouth.
"You tried to change the outcome, but you failed horribly. That's why I warned you beforehand..." Welt shakes her head
"..." Ash crosses her arms and frowns at her
"Then there's you who tried to help her"
"We've proven several times that we've broken off from your calculations" Ash denies her
"...Yet the outcome remains the same. What makes you think this would be any different?"
Of all the METAs, Ash is the only one who can have a long conversation with this creature. No one could tolerate her calculating nature worsened by her arrogance and mocking tone.
"Yet you saved Bismarck even if it goes against your calculations" Ash points out to her
"...Huh, you got me there" Welt couldn't retort
"You're being influenced by the humans you look down upon...even if you act like a child half of the time"
"Hahahaha. You don't change no matter what time timeline is, old friend"
Sometimes, I wonder how their hostile conversations haven't escalated into a physical confrontation. Their ideals and personalities contrast with each other no matter how many times they speak to each other.
"Are you two done talking now?"
I've been standing for a while now as they seemingly forget I've been invited here without me even knowing.
"You're in one piece. I suppose that saves me some trouble" Welt snaps her fingers
"I asked her to save you before you get consumed" Ash sighs
"In the past, your upgrade made you the strongest in Iron Blood, but you're way past your prime, Bismarck. You're just a battleship on your way to your graveyard"
"In the end, Chapayev dies...but everyone else survives"
I want to be at least glad there are no severe casualties, but the loss of one life is still unacceptable. Kansens are beings with their will and emotions, so it's a painful reminder how lives that have been lost can never return.
"Unleashing your full might would have increased her chances of survival, but you didn't deem it necessary. Even you know how one unrelated life isn't worth the risk" Welt tilts her head
"..."
Rather than deny her like I always do, I keep my mouth shut. This is one of the rare times, she can accurately guess my intentions. It's mostly correct, but it's still annoyingly accurate. My strength had diminished after I escaped my destroyed timeline and my wisdom cube can't support if I regularly use my full power. If I do that, my lifespan would have drastically decreased compared now. In fact, I would have been dead.
"That's right. I couldn't bring myself to use my true strength because I didn't want to waste it..." I'm forced to admit it
"No one blames you, Bismarck" Ash assures me
"Aren't you wasting your time here? That fellow H-39 is on the brink of death" Welt stands up
"What?!"
I stomped my left foot forward when Welt abruptly changed the topic just to inform me. She better not be playing tricks or taunting me.
"Right now, a measly shipgirl like her is facing a Siren. She received heavy damage and about to die in mere minutes" Welt shrugs her shoulders
"What kind of trick is this?" I raise my voice at her
"She isn't lying this time..." Ash stands up
"...?!"
"Welt has been observing events from the two worlds. The first was your struggle against Ghost and the second was the shipgirl you met against a Siren"
"Send me to her location right now" I quickly demand to her
"You got a lot of nerve to-"
Welt doesn't like to be ordered by anyone, so her eyes glow brighter when I sour her mood. Fortunately for everyone, Ash grabs her shoulder from behind and pulls her back.
"This is the least you can do after putting her in a situation like this" Ash reminds her
"Hmph...!" Welt almost growls
"Bismarck, you may not make it in time. Are you still willing to go?" Ash turns to face me
"Yes"
Even if in the end, I would still fail, I couldn't bear to make the same mistake. Knowing myself, I would come to regret it if I stayed here knowing how futile it is. It would only leave me with deep regret and I'd blame myself for not even trying.
"Sometimes I question how you are still alive. Well considering this isn't as horrible as that one timeline"
"What timeline?"
"You didn't know? While both you and your sister got the upgrade, Tirpitz struggled to control her metamorphosis. It's a long story but she hates Iron Blood even if she's amnesiac" Welt chuckles
"..."
"Enough of that. I'm doing you this favor just this once. So don't you dare order me next time"
In a matter of seconds, Welt's polite and relaxed tone immediately shifts to an irritated and threatening one. I'm more curious about Tirpitz's upgrade and how it affected her.
"Don't think I'll save you again for free next time, Bismarck"
Welt, looks impatient and annoyed as ever, snaps her fingers. In a split second, an unknown force drags my body right where I stand. Next thing I remember, everything is pitch black and my body feels lighter.
[I don't have the luxury to go all out unlike you, but I'm sure another "me" will make use of my power. My only hope is that "me" won't repeat my mistake]
Drifting into a pitch black space where all of my senses are cut off, an old memory flashes right before my eyes. It's a moment from an unknown time seemingly lost in my mind. I see Tirpitz gently caressing her beastly rigging similar to mine, but her body is deteriorating.
[For so long, that child longed for an equal hoping it would cure her loneliness. I guess she found her answer when she encountered us]
Then I see Enterprise in my mind. She looks rather content with her life. That's the Enterprise who encountered Welt and befriended her. Thinking about it reminds me how Welt is tamed and less childish, but that deep sea dragon is still impatient and annoyed as ever.
"Kkh!"
After a few minutes of light peace, my relaxed senses are shocked at the drastic change of environment. My body is dragged...teleported into a stormy sea. Everything is nearly shrouded in darkness and the heavy rain accompanied by the thunder roaring cancels out other sounds in my surroundings.
"...!"
Due to how dark everything is, the light of Siren projectile lights up in the distance. It's not simple energy based bullets or spears but a bright laser piercing the sky.
"No!"
I arrived in the middle of the battle and I know a normal kansen can't defend from an Elite Siren for so long.
"..."
If I release my true rigging here, I might have a chance to fend off the Siren, but I will damage myself on the process.
"Even if it's just one life..."
That shipgirl is someone I barely know, but this is like Chapayev. Even if it's not one of my people, seeing countless lives fall right before my eyes changed me. I couldn't ignore them and I don't want to turn away ever again.
"That's right..."
Charles William Ferdinand is someone who lost her human life - wiping out her old life because it's easier to restrain someone who doesn't know they are. There are others like her who've turned into a blank slate with only fulfilling their duty in mind. At the very, I want to see the possibility where she's no longer empty.
"Ggh!"
Fifty percent. At the very least, I could use that much without damaging my rigging and further straining my wisdom cube. It's painful since it uses a lot of energy, but I need to use it now.
"...!"
The metallic three headed beast manifests behind me, proudly stretching its wings and roaring at the sky.
"It's been a long time, Geryon..."
All three heads simultaneously fiercely roar like they're going to shake the sea and the storm.
"Let's go"
Just as my true rigging manifests, my appearance also temporarily returns to my prime. I feel slightly proud and relieved to have some of my former power flow through me once again, but I primarily focus on rushing as fast as I could.
"...!"
I push through the storm as fast as I can and my body feels lighter using some of my original power once again. There's a limit to how long I can maintain this form, so I sailed at maximum speed. It's a faint cannon fire and explosions at first, but the noise becomes louder and louder in every second that passes.
"That's too bad, huh. No wonder Hermit left already"
The Siren Purifier proudly grins...looking at the battleship who bleeding from head to toe and her rigging heavily damaged.
"Bis...marck, is that you...?" Charles William Ferdinand removes her damaged yet intact helmet
Charles William Ferdinand coughs out blood when she forces herself to speak and she forces herself to greet me with a cheerful smile.
"Too bad. That failed tool is about to die-" Purifier mocks me
Before the wretched Siren can spit out another insult, I swing my arm and Geryon responds to my will. The Siren Purifier immediately retaliates by bombarding Geryon's heads with energy based projectiles. Its steel body is resistant to Elite Siren attacks, but it's difficult to maintain my power after being handicapped.
"Do what you want. I already won-"
The Siren doesn't care anymore and spreads out both arms in the air. Just as Geryon unhinges its enormous jaws, the Siren only keeps maniacally laughing even at the moment my rigging snaps its jaws tear her to unrecognizable pieces like a mad dog.
"Hahaha...I never thought you'd be such a cool battleship looking like a might general and...with a damn metal dragon at that..."
"Charles..."
"Herzog Ferdinand is fine. It's not like it matter right now..."
I'm sure it's excruciating painful to endure standing with all those injuries. It reaches a point where I don't think she can see or hear clearly anymore.
"I was...a nobody in the past. An ordinary person...that was given the chance to do something meaningful in life..." Herzog Ferdinand approaches me even if her legs are shaking
"Don't say anything or your wounds will get worse" I try to help her maintain balance
"When I volunteered for the project...I thought I could ease someone's burden by becoming an experimental battleship"
"..."
"My wish is simple: I want to be needed and I want to make my efforts worth it - so I became a blank slate like they wanted. I kept fighting as an ordinary soldier..."
"You fought as a brave warrior...standing until the very end"
All I could do is comfort her and let her know of her bravery. Just like some people I know, she wished to be useful. A simple wish of an ordinary person hoping she could be of use.
What a pain. I thought I could be of use to the Kriegsmarine, but I will die as a failure..." Herzog Ferdinand coughs out blood again
"I won't allow you to die here. Not until-"
"This is fine. I did my best...and I don't regret not running away. Well...I wouldn't be able to run from that freaky Abyssal like maniac"
"Still..."
There's no need to offer herself in this war. Ferdinand started out as a regular person - clueless about the horrors of the front line, but she abandoned a mundane yet peaceful life for a chance she could feel useful for everyone. How reckless can that be...
"I never knew your real name...because you said something about abandoning it" Herzog Ferdinand weakly chuckles
"Yes. I discarded it along with my world..." I briefly close my eyes
Then will you take my name, nameless battleship?" Herzog Ferdinand suddenly offers
"What?!"
"You discarded your old name...so at least take mine. This is just a borrowed name after all and it deserves to be carried by someone who still struggles for their future"
Although I doubt my worthiness of still be proud to be "Bismarck" after causing the destruction of my land, I don't think I'm prepared to carry someone else's name.
"You have...nowhere to go anymore and you don't exist here. Take it as a second chance in life. Now...you're free to start all over again"
I stare at how she pressing the side of her stomach. Blood seeps between her fingers and the color and flow are diluted by the heavy rain. She's suffering from blood loss and would die before she can even makes it back to port. We both know that even without saying much.
"..." I bite my lower lip and frown
I'm exiled in this world and I can't remain in Azur Lane for long periods of time as their Bismarck still lives and Iron Blood stands strong. I know my strength isn't needed there. At least not yet.
"...?!"
I suddenly gasp and Geryon lifts its three heads at the same time. Multiple hostiles are heading into the direction and I couldn't confirm if they're Abyssals or Sirens - maybe both.
"Enemy, huh. Well. I still got one last kick in me" Herzog Ferdinand moves forward
"Ferdinand?"
"I'm a Kriegsmarine even if I'm a half baked experimental battleship" She tosses her helmet to me
"..." I stare at the scratched and helmet
I could still fight normal enemies if I push myself to the limit, but I think she's aware I can't hold on long enough to come back in one piece myself. That's why she's offering herself instead - a battleship who's minutes to collapsing and sinking to the bottom of the ocean.
"I will honor your wish..." I have no choice but to accept it
"Danke sehr..."
"Are you going to remain here and fight until you sink?" I wear her helmet
"That is how we are in the Kriegsmarine. We're quite stubborn and difficult to deal with" Herzog Ferdinand weakly laughs
"..."
"You know, if it didn't turn out like this...we might have shared a drink or two"
"Charles William Ferdinand..." I utter the original's true name one last time
"Now go"
"..."
The enemies are close so I mustn't waste my time standing and staring. Herzog Ferdinand is going to die and it's perhaps due to the last bit of willpower that she could still stand straight.
"..."
She doesn't look back at me even as I slowly leave the area, but I take one last glance at her. Even when her rigging is heavily damaged and her time is running out, she takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. That's how someone who's prepared to die and even welcomes their death tends to react.
I hate it.
Warriors and soldiers stand up so the common people don't have to throw away their life, but ordinary people like her willingly sacrifice everything believing they're doing what's for the best.
I hate it.
No one must sacrifice their normal life to throw their life for someone who won't even remember them. I certainly wouldn't accept any normal citizen to mindlessly sacrifice their life. That's why I do everything I can to gain power back then so I can ease the burden of my comrades and to keep the peaceful lives of the common folks.
"..."
After a minute or so, I hear mixed cannon fire and screeching of horrifying beasts. It goes on for a few more minutes before the roar of cannons completely silences. I don't know if the heavy rain overwhelms my hearing or the battle has ended already.
"..."
There's no uncertainty or excuses. I know the result already. There are no tears because it is by her own will that she chooses to die fighting.
"I, too, never learned your true name..."
As someone who used to be an ordinary human, she would have a name while she spends her peaceful lives among the millions of people around her. That is...before Herzog Ferdinand abandoned her individuality to be a "common soldier" for the Kriegsmarine.
...
Two days later...
By the time the sky has cleared up, I returned to the base forced to conceal my own face from the normal humans working at the base and the shipgirls visiting time to time. Everyone finds it strange and worrying that I no longer take off my helmet when walking outside, but I don't mind their concerned gazes as long as they believe I'm still the experimental battleship.
"You're not the type to sit by an empty beach and stare afar"
As I sit somewhere far from the base to be Bismarck for another moment, Ash personally visits me. I've been staring at the helmet lightly buried under the sand in front of me that I don't notice her presence.
"I heard you replaced that shipgirl so you can live here without problem" Ash stands beside me
"I have to hide my face as a result"
"That must have been suspicious for humans"
"I just told them that I've been badly wounded and left a permanent scar. So now they pity me instead" I just sigh without a care
"That annoying child is still playing around"
"Even you find her intolerable. Well, she regressed to a younger form so her mentality matched it"
Ash is unusually patient and tolerant of the monstrous scaly bastard who does nothing but toys with the outcome like a simulation. Unlike the Sirens who at least have their shared goal, Welt is only curious if the outcome could be changed for better or for worse.
"It's some sort of imperfect back up since her actual consciousness is busy within her core. I don't know what she's up to, but I'm certain she doesn't wish to ruin the world" Ash is still calm
"..."
"Will you keep living here?"
"Yes. I can't really spend time in Azur Lane, so it's best to stay here until you need my strength" I immediately confirm
"Are you going to live the closest thing to a normal life?"
"This is the best for everyone. For Iron Blood, for my sister, and for the other METAs"
We both stare at the beach since Ash and I failed to protect what's dear to us and now live with that guilt. Certain members of Iron Blood have become my enemy - some resent me for abandoning them while the others betrayed me.
"I hope you may find some respite here, Bismarck" Ash closes her eyes
"Me too..."
I won't have to fight Sirens here, but I will still have to fight as someone else. No one knows and no one will know I carry the name of a dead battleship. So long as this name can't be tainted by anyone else, I will do what I can to honor her wish and find some form of peace here.
It won't last forever, but it's a start...
