Chapter 4: Kyouya's Challenge
Despite the defeat of the Dullahan, the party found themselves on hard times with next to no money to their names. Whatever cash was earned from the general's defeat had already been spent on buying drinks for everyone during the following celebration.
Kazuma was cursing himself for this "adventurous new life" being nothing like he was promised. He looked down at his goddess of a party member, whom had spent their earnings so frivolously that day.
Fortunately for Aqua, she managed to wake herself up, get dressed and leave the stables before the Slayer was asked for another wake-up call.
"I hate being poor! And I can't go back to working again!!!", the goddess lamented to her other party members at the guild where Darkness and Megumin rendezvoused with the trio.
They all agreed to earn some money on a real quest. Even Aqua, who agreed that she'd actually go for the quest, any quest whatever the difficulty at this point as she skipped to the quest board. She plucked a paper straight from the board.
"Ooooh, this one's perfect! Just look at all those zeros!", the greedy goddes exclaimed as she eyed the page.
"Hold up! Lemme see what kinda crap you picked first!", said Kazuma as he snatched the paper away from Aqua's hands. They were all still beginners at this point and he didn't trust her to start off on something simple. He kept her restrained with a hand to her face while he read the quest.
"A manticore and a griffin are fighting over territory in the region and disturbing the peace. If you kill them, you will receive a reward of 500,000 eris."
"ARE YOU NUTS!?!", he yelled at her.
"Good thing I came to check, she would've gone for the most dangerous quest on the board if it meant a fat payout!", the shut-in thought to himself as he gave a judgmental look at the goddess.
The Slayer had already stomped his way over to where the duo were, making Kazuma jump slightly from standing behind him.
"Seriously, how the hell does he do that?! He could give one of those American horror movie slasher villains a run for their money!!!", he thought, clutching his still-beating heart.
The Doom Slayer took the quest page from the boy's hands and, after looking it over, thumped a fist onto his armored chest.
"Ooh! So you'll do it!? That's perfect! While you're off doing that quest, the rest of us can do a quest of our own and together we can make double the money!", Aqua cheered, excited from the prospect of the cash-cow the Slayer had immediately become.
The Slayer nodded and began to walk out of the tavern, intent on following the directions on the piece of paper towards his next targets.
"Just remember to come back here with proof of what you did to get pa~id!!!", the goddess called out to the Hellwalker like a mother saying goodbye to their child on the first day of school.
"Are you sure this is a good idea?", asked Kazuma, skeptical of Aqua and the Slayer's decision to venture off on some dangerous quest.
"Of course I am! Did you forget what he did to that Dullahan or are you starting to feel the effects of the Slayer bonking you on the head?", she teased.
"Don't remind me…", Kazuma groaned, rubbing his head from the phantom pain of the chop.
"But let me rephrase my previous question: are you sure it's a good idea letting the Slayer do a quest ON HIS OWN?", he added.
"Oh, he'll be fine. He's taken on much worse in Hell. Besides, I'm pretty sure he would've done it for free. So why not profit off his bloodlust?", Aqua reasoned.
Kazuma was about to argue again until Aqua had already found interest in another quest on the board.
"Ooh! How about this? Need to purify the town's lake. It's become so foul that no one can drink from it and deadly alligators have made it their home. They'll leave once the lake is purified so there'll be no need to kill them. 300,000 eris reward."
A huge smile widened on the boisterous goddess' face.
"This quest has my name written all over it!"
A few hours later…
"This quest stinks…", Aqua whined to herself.
Without the Slayer to defend them, the party had resorted to getting a cage for Aqua to sit in while she purified the lake. A process that had proven to take hours apparently.
The rest of her party members could only overlook the scene from a safe distance, only able to reel her back in once the quest was complete.
"I hate this. My butt feels all soggy and gross. Now I know how teabags feel when they're left steeping for too long.", the goddess groaned as she sat in the murky water, waiting for it to be crystal clear.
The remaining three could only mope about, waiting for the lake to become clear as well.
"Man, this is freaking boring. I wonder how the Hellstronaut is holding up with his quest.", Kazuma thought in complete boredom.
(BANG!)(BANG!)(BANG!)
(CHKCHKCHKCHKCHKCHKCHK!)
"GRRRRROOOOOAAAAAUUUUGGGGHH!!!!"
"SKRRRRRRYYYYYY!!!"
The Slayer was currently in the heat of battle in a threeway free-for-all battle royale with the manticore and griffin.
At least that was what the Slayer assumed he would be in once he began showering the two creatures in shells and bullets.
Surprisingly, the two creatures had ceased attacking each other and had formed some sort of alliance once a bigger threat had entered the picture.
The battle had escalated to the point where the griffin decided to just swoop up the Slayer while the manticore distracted him and attempt to drop him from a high altitude hoping the impact of the fall would be enough to kill this violent intruder.
The manticore had taken the Hellwalker by surprise and sweeped the Slayer's feet out from under him with its scorpion tail, granting the griffin the window they required.
The griffin had its talons clamped onto the Hellwalker's ankles but the Doom Marine had managed to grab onto the manticore's scorpion tail before liftoff, causing the entire trio to take flight and continue their fight into the skies.
Several hours later…
The trio of human party members had perked up at the sight of something new finally happening.
That boisterous smile Aqua bore earlier in the day had faded and was nowhere to be seen as she was in a state of pure terror.
"AAAAAAAAUUUGGGGHHHH!!!PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!!"
Unfortunately for her, the aforementioned alligators had arrived. While the cage prevented them from reaching her, that didn't detour them from rattling the cage and making Aqua's experience inside it an absolute nightmare.
The panicking goddess did whatever she could to hasten the process and get her the hell out of there faster.
"PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!!PURIFICATION!!! THE CAGE MADE A CRUNCH SOUND! CAGES AREN'T SUPPOSED TO MAKE CRUNCH SOUNDS!!!", Aqua wailed, getting further into hysterics by the second.
Her party members could only watch the event unfold like spectators.
"It almost looks fun in there. I'm growing quite jealous.", Darkness mused as she yearned to be in Aqua's place.
"I bet the Slayer is having more fun with his mission", Megumin huffed, wanting to be at the Armored Goliath's side in battle against the two vicious beasts.
"Right, I almost can't decide which I would rather take. Such a difficult choice…", the Crusader sighed, now wishing to be in two places at once.
Several more hours later…
The Slayer had returned to Axel and was now trudging down the street, making his way to the adventurers guild and garnering looks of shock and awe from the locals along the way.
They couldn't be held at fault though since it wasn't every day that an armored stranger covered in rubble dust, dried blood and feathers dragged the decapitated heads of a griffin and manticore in each hand respectively down the goddamn street!
It just wasn't something that they'd see every day.
The Hellwalker stopped his stroll when he noticed the rest of his party members and one of them specifically being towed into town in cage. There was also someone else, a male knight in blue armor around Kazuma's age trailed by two young female followers in skimpy outfits, who pried open the cage and released Aqua who was apparently the one made out to look like a prisoner. The knight was soon shouting in surprise and shock when the rest of the party spoke to him.
"WHAAAAA?!? THESE ARE YOUR PARTY MEMBERS?!?", the knight exclaimed.
"Well, yeah.", Aqua shrugged before seeing the Slayer in the distance.
"Oh, look! There's our last party member and it looks like he's already wrapped up his own little mission.", the goddess replied as she hailed the Hellwalker over.
The odd new trio were left stunned into silence as the Slayer stomped over, still dirtied from his recent battle and casually dropped the severed heads of the beasts he had been victorious over.
"So, yeah. That's… the Doom Slayer…", Kazuma replied reluctantly.
"Why couldn't he just keep walking to the guild? This is definitely not gonna end well…", he lamented internally.
Meanwhile, the armored boy, now introduced as Kyouya Mitsurugi, had his guard up from this intimidating new stranger. His two female groupies had huddled up behind the boy as he acted to be a human shield for them.
"That otherworldly armor, could he have also been brought to this world by the goddess Aqua? If so, then he must've decided on that armor in an attempt to avoid pain. He's probably nothing but a coward underneath that imposing stature.", Kyouya deduced.
As the main party had decided to head out and return to the adventurer's guild to receive their pay for their recent quest, the blue-armored boy and his two female followers(still clinging behind the knight) stopped the group.
"Hold it! Lady Aqua! I can't in good conscience allow you to remain with these atrocious party members that treat you so terribly. The men in your party are sleazy selfish scumbags!", Kyouya berated as he pointed at Kazuma first.
"They're either nothing more than a treacherous lech…"
His accusatory pointing finger then switched its aim at the Slayer.
"…or a psychotic coward hiding behind armor gifted to them from the gods!"
The Hellwalker's brow furrowed. He wasn't alone in his own growing opinion of the male knight though.
"I do feel conflicted on him, but I cannot deny the growing urge to punch him in the face.", noted Darkness.
"I wanna blow him up. Lemme blow him up.", asked Megumin blatantly.
Kyouya continued his declaration towards Kazuma and the Slayer as he returned his gaze towards the one who had forced Aqua out of her divine realm.
"And so, I challenge you to a duel! If I win, Lady Aqua shall accompany me and be free of you fiends!"
Kazuma was just about to charge the knight and catch him off guard until The Doom Slayer placed a hand on Kazuma's shoulder as he stepped forward. He thumped a fist on his chest.
"Oh? So you'll battle in his place and accept my challenge? Alright then you barbarian! I accept your offer!", the blue-armor-clad golden boy knight replied.
The two armored warriors soon stood face to face with one another, splitting the distance with a few paces as they prepared their duel.
"Now, draw out your blade and prepare yourself!"
The Hellwalker nodded and raised his left hand, the wrist-blade jutting out with a clench of his fist.
This only garnered laughs from Kyouya's two female followers as they chittered from behind the male knight's back.
"Is that it?!"
"It's so tiny! What's he supposed to do with that?!"
"Maybe that armor was compensating for something after all."
The pompous knight looked over the Slayer.
"Oh come on, don't tell me you don't have an actual sword!? Even your male cohort has something resembling a sword!", he demanded, pointing at Kazuma's sheathed weapon.
"Resembling a sword?! The hell is that supposed to mean?!", the shut-in yelled internally.
The Slayer merely shook his head. The last he recalled when he had such a weapon, it's blade was currently buried within the brains of the eldritch abomination otherwise known as the Icon of Sin back on Hayden's Earth.
So that would be a no, he didn't have anything that could pass as a sword on him at the moment.
"Well, since I am a noble and fair knight, I shall offer a longsword from my own vast collection for you to wield in our battle.", the male knight declared as he walked towards his opponent and brought out a longsword from his own inventory.
He never needed them since his own sword Gram was already so powerful and couldn't be beat. He hung onto them in the event of someone joining his own party being low on supplies. He was just that generous.
The Slayer took the longsword and examined it, turning it around in his hand and feeling its weight. He raised it high, attempting to test its strength against his wrist-blade.
"Careful, I can't be held responsible if you break your-", Kyouya began as he tried to warn the Slayer against testing the blade. That was until the longsword snapped against the mystery metal of the tiny blade with a SNAP!
The knight and his two entourages were left agape at just how durable the "tiny blade" actually was. The Hellwalker then casually tossed aside the remnant of the longsword, preferring his wrist-blade instead.
Kyouya merely shook off the shock and got a steady grip on his own sword. The clash between two gifts from the gods: the advanced enigmatic armor and the cursed sword Gram that only he, Kyouya Mitsurugi, chosen champion that will one day defeat the Devil King, can wield.
He charged forward, rushing with his sword raised overhead as he closed the distance between himself and the Slayer. The Slayer though remained absolutely still, completely unwavering by the advancing enemy.
This was it, he was finally gonna teach this monster a lesson like the many monsters that came before him.
He raised his sword, going for a diagonal slash against this demonic dastardly devil and slashed with all his might as the powerful magic blade crackled a bright glowing blue. He really wanted to test just how strong this armor was, even if it was also a gift from the goddess. He expected this enemy to fall from the-
(CRACK)
The silence was deafening from the stillness in the air as the male knight as his two female followers were left with eyes widened from the sight of Gram, the powerful cursed magic sword that had befell countless beasts beforehand, missing its tip and leaving only a cracked stub in its place.
As for the Doom Slayer, there wasn't a scratch on his impenetrable armor. He didn't even so much as flinch.
"Wha-? What in the-? How in the-?", Kyouya stuttered, face paling from the impossible sight before him as he was fixated on what was once his mighty gift from the goddess Aqua.
Almost too fixated as the Slayer stomped closer with his wrist-blade arm raised high. The knight could only glance behind him, too petrified to do or even think of doing of anything else.
Now it was The Slayer's turn.
[Insert violins from Psycho here]
As he saw the light of the setting sun gleaming off of the tiny but durable blade, Kyouya's entire life flashed before his eyes.
Not just his time in this fantasy world when he did battle against the Ancient Dragon before this incident and when he met his two vixens for allies, but even before that.
When he had first met Lady Aqua and was gifted the powerful sword Gram.
When he had originally died in his first life that had initiated this second chance.
His entire life back in Japan when he was just a mere high school student.
Even long before that.
His knees wobbled, awaiting whatever was next for him after this next life. That is until…
(SHHK)
The raised blade suddenly retracted back into the buff marine's wrist.
"HUHHHHH?!?", everyone there asked. Not just Kyouya and his two cutie groupies, but also Kazuma, Aqua, Megumin, Darkness and all of the Axel citizens that had gathered for the fight, legitimately thinking he'd end the poor fool's life.
The Doom Slayer then bopped the male knight on the head with said raised fist, causing him to collapse and being rendered unconscious.
"KYOUYAAAAAA!!!!", the two female followers cried out as they scurried towards their fallen source of affection, falling to their knees as they did whatever they could to resuscitate him.
Meanwhile, the Slayer walked over and picked up the blue armored knight's weapon. Or at least what was left of it. That other end must be around here somewhere.
He wasn't wrong as one quivering denizen nearby was standing directly under where the sword tip had been embedded into the wall right behind him. The blade had been mere inches above the frightened man's head. The man appeared if he was about to faint and join the male knight in unconsciousness.
The Slayer strolled towards a befuddled Kazuma and held it out towards the him. He understood the cue and readied himself once the Hellwalker plopped the sword Gram right into his open arms. However, the weight of the sword took the boy by surprise and caused him to fall onto the floor, pined by the weight of the weapon.
"HOLY CRAP, THIS THING IS HEAVY AS HELL! HOW WERE YOU CARRYING THIS THING SINGLE-HANDLY!?!?", the shut-in cried out, kicking as he struggled to lift the weapon.
"Hey! That's Kyouya's sword! You can't just take it!", shouted one of the male knight's followers.
A single slow pivot of the Slayer's gaze falling onto the trio was enough to silence the two girls and drag their comrade away in pure fear.
Later that day…
"This is so unfair!!!", Aqua whined as she rested her head on the table with a THUD.
Back at the Adventurer's Guild, Aqua was hoping for a big payload from the quest she had completed today. Unfortunately, her supposed "savior" had pried open the cage she had resided in during her slight traumatic episode and now they were all left with the bill.
"We were supposed to get 300,000 eris from completing that quest and now WE have to pay 250,000 for damage to the cage that we didn't even cause?!", she groaned.
"The next time I see that jerk, I'm giving him a God Blow to his stupid face!", the goddess growled with a clenched fist.
Kazuma did his best to comfort his party member(and himself mostly from the hectic day) by trying to look on the positives.
"Hey, at least the Slayer managed to finish his quest.", he mentioned, hoping that would be enough to cease her complaining.
At that moment, the Bane of Hell stomped over and brought out a piece of parchment from his hammer-space inventory. He handed the note to Aqua.
"Huh, what's this?", she asked as she took the paper from his gauntlet-clad hands and combed through the letter.
At that moment, her face grew so pale and eyes glossed over that Kazuma almost thought her soul was leaving her body. That is, if goddesses even had souls to lose.
Kazuma took the letter from the blue-haired girl's limp hand and read its contents aloud.
"To the party members of this violent mute behemoth,
Your barbarian of a party member had recently been assigned our quest to slay the local manticore and griffin that has been causing our local town and several others in the region much grief.
While he did eventually slay the troublesome creatures and we are undoubtedly grateful for him in doing so, the battle that was originally on the outskirts of our village was brought into it when all three of the beasts literally dropped out of the sky and into the center of our town square.
Nobody was killed or injured during the fiasco, yet several shops and town properties were damaged in the battle, not just from the creatures themselves that almost looked like they were trying to escape the berserker's wrath, but rather your inconsiderate maniac of a party member's powerful array of magical weaponry and inhuman strength that allowed him and the two monsters to throw each other around like children's toys.
Even though we already pity you for having to manage this violent brute, we still demand compensation for the damages he is responsible for.
That includes the payment for the quest and more so.
Thank you and good luck,
~the Chief of _Village."
Below was also the amount of eris being demanded from said village chief.
Kazuma blinked, now fully understanding Aqua's earlier reaction. He turned towards the Slayer.
"WHAT THE HELL DUDE!?! YOU TRASHED A FREAKING TOWN!?!", he shouted hysterically at the armored giant, who only gave a slight shoulder shrug in response.
The shut-in could only groan from said response.
"That's it. No more solo quests for you. You either go with us or have someone here go with you to keep an eye on you. Got it?", he stated.
The Hellwalker stayed motionless for a few seconds before nodding, agreeing to the boy's request.
"Kazuma Sato!!!", an annoyingly familiar voice shouted from the other end of the Adventurer's Guild.
"Oh great,this guy again.", he groaned internally.
The blue-armored Boy Scout, Kyouya Mitsurugi had returned to settle the score as he marched up to Kazuma, to which he was dreading such a confrontation. Not for reasons of physical harm but of putting up with the guy's nauseating personality.
But before he could get a single word out to berate the boy…
"GOD BLOW!!!"
Aqua unleashed her divine strength in the form of a knuckle sandwich right across the male knight's face, making him fall onto the floor. Kyouya's reappearance had snapped the arch-priest out of her earlier internal conflict with good dose of fury.
In all honesty, she just needed to take it out on something. Or in this case, someone.
"Muh-muh-muh-M'Lady Aqua!!!", the knight stuttered as soon as he recovered. Aqua soon grabbed him by the collar of his armor.
"I'M ALREADY IN MASSIVE DEBT RIGHT NOW SO THE LEAST YOU CAN DO FOR ME IS PAY ME THE 250,000 ERIS YOU CONTRIBUTED TO IT WITH THAT CAGE YOU DAMAGED!!!!", she yelled right into his face.
"Oh…um, right! Okay!", the blue knight stuttered nervously.
Once that matter was settled, Kyouya returned to the reason for his reappearance.
"Uh… anyways, Kazuma Sato! I know I may be the last person you wish to see but I beg of you! Please return me my magic sword!", the male knight bowed reluctantly.
The knight then felt his cape being tugged by the arch-wizard of the party.
"Just so you know, he doesn't have it anymore.", replied Megumin, pointing at her male party member.
The male knight's face soon paled over after giving a look over and realizing his sword was nowhere on Kazuma's person.
"Wh-wh-where is my sword, Kazuma?", he asked, trying and failing to retain composure.
"Oh, that? I sold it.", the brown-haired boy calmly stated, holding up the pouch of money as proof.
"DAMMMMMNNNNNIIIIIIT!!!!!", Kyouya cried out, running out of the Guild in a hurry to retrieve his sacred weapon with his two groupie party members following suit.
"It was surprisingly more of a hassle than I expected really.", Kazuma sighed.
Alongside with lugging the thing around, he also had to go back to get the sword tip that broke off and pry it out off the wall it was embedded in after the local merchant refused to purchase the blade without the tip so it could be reforged.
Several hundred miles away and a couple days ago…
In the middle of a vast desert, a lone carriage was making its typical run of delivering adventurers, other passengers and standard trading wares to and from distant regions.
On the back of said carriage hid a single stowaway: a lone, slightly charred and dented, helmet that used to be the feared Undead General of the Devil King.
He fumed in silence, vowing vengeance as each clop of the horses' hooves brought him closer to his castle where his army of minions resided, probably wondering where he had gone off to and why a simple errand was taking so long.
He was also getting closer to reaping his revenge against the party of simpletons that had left him in this humiliating state.
He made the mistake of underestimating them once but next time, he will not be repeating it.
Next Chapter: The Great Slayer and The Crimson Queen(or Doomguy and Yunyun)
Author's Note:
I've gotta be honest, I've only got a couple more chapters worth of ideas for scenarios in this story.
Although, that doesn't mean I'd like to see the Slayer end up somewhere else had he not ended up in the world of Konosuba when he did.
Rather instead, have him end up in the middle of some rather "risqué" stories on alternate Earths.
The ideas of scenarios are pretty barebones given my current lack of viewing the… "source material", (only aware of both franchises through meme clips, nothing more)but I'd think it'd be funny to see this Slayer's charm in some potential One-Shots.
Or even full-on short stories if anyone is willing. Just keep the Slayer how he is here.
For the titles:
Heaven and Hell's Lost Property
To LOVE-Doom(alternate titles also include Motto To LOVE-Doom, To LOVE-Doom Darkness; depending on where the Slayer could be dropped into)
Have to stress again though, if anyone wants use these ideas for their own story, KEEP THE SLAYER SILENT, VIOLENT AND SEXUALLY NEUTRAL. He's been killing demons for literal eons, the only succubus he'll be interested in is one he can butcher with his bare hands. It'd be like making Jason Vorhees or Michael Myers a pervert or Chad, they lose what made them so iconic.
