Family
Chapter 258 Magical Mishap 4
By: Major144
Disclaimer: I do not own anything, expect the OCs. This is just a story for fun.
At the park Matilda Matchstick was still observing Marceline and the others from afar. Marceline, Lucinda, Jake, and Alria were jamming out with their musical instruments and their friends and the few other people at the park, were gathered together watching the little jam and enjoying. Matilda could hear the music all the way from her Chapel and as she listened she found herself grooving to the music. The angel realized this and quickly slapped herself on the cheek to snap herself out of it and focus on the task at hand.
"Snap out of it Matilda and focus! That Marceline person must be a succubus using evil devil music to become popular and make people lower their guards. Well that won't work on me! I am on a divine mission of holly virtue and I will purge this land of evil. Now I have to make a good entrance." Said Matilda to herself.
Marceline and the other music players had decided to take a little break and drink some water, when they suddenly heard the sound of church bells coming from the sky above and everyone looked up to see what appeared to be some kind of building falling from the sky! The building crashed to the ground with a thunderous crash kicking up a cloud of dust. Everyone blinked in confusion as the dust began to settle and they saw an odd looking church chapel that seemed to have two eyes on the front of it. A bright white glowed brightly from the Chapel and the air was filled with the sound of a choir singing hallelujah. The doors dramatically flew open and out flew a bunch of doves flew out followed by Matilda, who glided out with her hands clasped together and a radiant smile on her face. Everyone stared at the newcomer not sure what to make of her. Matilda smiled at the crowd.
"Yes! Totally nailed the entrance! Now on to my introduction and to explain why I'm here. I'll expose that demon and show these people the light of my divine justice." Thought Matilda.
"Um who exactly are you supposed to be?" Asked Lance.
"Good marrow people of these lands. I am the marvels and majestic Matilda Matchstick! I am an angel of justice on a nobel quest to cleanse this fair world of evil and sin. I have been informed that there is a demon here that pretends to be on the side of good, but is actually planning to destroy everything that is good and right in this world." Said Matilda.
"Who is this demon your after?" Asked Lucinda.
"It is the one who goes by the name Marceline!" Said Matilda as she pointed a finger at Marceline.
"Me?" Asked Marceline.
"Yeah...I think you have your information wrong." Said Lucinda.
"Is Marceline a demon?" Asked Matilda.
"Well, I'm part demon, but I'm not evil and I have no desire to destroy anything good." Said Marceline.
"That's what someone with demon blood say! You would deny the truth and deceive people. You ticks won't work on succumbs! I challenge you to combat and you will face the might of justice!" Said Matilda.
"Ok, one I'm only part demon and I'm totally not a succumbs, two I'm telling the truth and I'm not deceiving anyone, and three I'm not going to fight some angel nut, with a crazy sense of justice. I have no idea where you got your info, but it's bogus. So why don't go into your little house or whatever and leave." Said Marceline.
Matilda was a bit shocked by this response, but she soon regained her composure and glared at Marceline.
"Fight me or else!"
"Or else what?" Asked Marceline.
"I'll...um..." Said Matilda trying to think of something to say.
"You going to attack all the people in the park? That really doesn't sound like a thing an angel of justice would do. Sounds more like something a demon would do." Said Marceline.
"Your a...um chicken!" Declared Matild.
"Wow. Name calling. Yeah, I'm still not going to fight." Said Marceline.
Matilda was getting a bit frustrated and a little desperate to start a fight. She decided to turn up the insults.
"Well that makes you a...coward! Yeah a coward! Your just like the rest of your fealty kind demon! Your parents are probably disgusting sinful weaklings! Your and your evil friends are putrid garbage. I feel sorry for the poor souls, who waste their time with you listening to your trash music!"
"Ok firstly I'm not coward and neither are my parents. I'll have you know that my parents and the people who helped are good kind people. None of my friends are evil and neither am I. Also my music isn't trash and a ton of people like it. You just don't have no real taste in music." Said Marceline.
"If your not a coward, then prove it. Fight me!" Said Matilda.
"Ok seriously, why? I already told you I'm not evil and that I'm not going to fight you. What would I even gain by fighting a nut like you?" Said Marceline.
"I'm on a holly mission to rid this place of evil! You are a demon and you must be destroyed! This is a war of good and evil! I'm going to fight you one way or another." Said Matilda.
"Fine. If you want a fight so bad I'll fight you. You asked for it." Said Marceline.
"Marceline are you sure about this? I have a bad feeling about this person." Said Lucinda.
"Relax I got this." Said Marceline as she readied her ax.
"Would everyone else kindly step back. I don't want anyone to get caught in the crossfire." Said Matilda.
"This between me and Matchstick. No one interfere." Said Marceline.
The others put some distance between the two fighters. Several hundred yards away Gentleman Wizard, Sorceress, and Deceit sat at a picnic table ready to watch the fight start.
Marceline and Matilda faced each other. Matilda let out a laugh and flew backwards into her Chapel. The doors closed with a thud and the eyes on the building glared at Marceline.
"I thought we were going to fight?" Said Marceline.
"We are." Called Matilda from inside the Chapel.
"Seems like your hiding in your lair." Said Marceline.
"This is part of my strategy. Now prepare! I'm going to fight a demon with a demon! Go forth Legion!" Said Matilda.
The doors of the Chapel flew open and out swarmed a couple dozen pigs.
"What's this supposed to be?" Asked Marceline.
"This is a demon of old named Legion. He was defeated and cast into the body of several pigs and now he serves me to atone for his wicked crimes. Now destroy that demon girl Legion!" Called Matilda.
The pigs charged at Marceline and a few of them leaped at her, only to be easily swatted aside, by Marceline's ax. A bunch of pigs managed to dog pile on Marceline, but she threw them off. Legion regrouped and all the pigs merged together to form a massive ball of squirming bodies.
"We are called Legion. For we are many." Said the ball.
Legion rolled towards Samantha and slammed into her knocking her to the ground. A couple of pigs leaped off the ball and tried to attack Marceline, but she knocked them away and flew at Legion. Marceline began to chop away at the sphere making a bunch of pigs fall off of it, until she reached the center and saw a large glowing red sphere with a pig face, slammed her ax into it and shattered it. Legion and all the pigs exploded and bacon began to rain from the sky.
"Stupid swine! Time to take things up a notch. Go Jersey Devil!" Called Matilda from the Chapel.
The doors flew open and out flew a strange creature. The Jersey Devil had the body of a lion, the head of a goat, leathery bat-like wings, horns, small arms with clawed hands, cloven hooves and a forked tail. The demon let out a roar as it unleashed a blast of fire, from it's mouth at Marceline. The vampire dodged the attack, but the demon leaped forward and swatted Marceline's ax away from, her before slamming her into the ground and held her down. Jersey Devil let out a nasty chuckle as it prepared to blast Marceline with fire. Marceline headbutted the demon in the face knocking some of it's teeth out and forced the creature to let her go as it stumbled back in pain. The vampire leaped to her feet and charged at Jersey Devil. The demon lunged at her, but she leaped over him and landed on his back.
"Time for a ride!" Said Marceline as she grabbed Jersey Devil's horns and yanked on them.
Jersey Devil screeched and began to buck and thrash trying to fling Marceline off, but she held on. The demon took flight into the air, but Marceline still held on. Marceline then pushed down on the horns and forced Jersey Devil to take a nose dive. Jersey Devil crashed into the ground with a scream and a crash kicking up dust. The dust then cleared showing Marceline standing over Jersey Devil holding the demon's broken horns. Jersey wailed in pain and shame before exploding into a cloud of black smoke.
"Stupid useless demon!" Yelled Matilda as her head and upper body appeared on top of the Chapel roof.
"You going to fight me yourself this time?" Asked Marceline.
"Not yet. I have one more fighter for you and unlike those useless idiot demons, this one is a divine beast! Go Holy Cow!" Said Matilda.
The doors opened again and out flew a cow with a large udder, white feathery wings, and a halo flew out. The cow also wore a white robe.
"You have got to be kidding me." Muttered Marceline.
Holy Cow put his hind hoofs on his udder and began to squirt milk at Marceline. At first Marceline wasn't going to do anything, but Lucinda shouted at her.
"Don't let that stuff hit you!"
Marceline dodged to the side, but her lefthand got some milk on it and the skin smoked and burn.
"What the heck?!" Cried Marceline as she winced and blew on her hand.
"I make Holy Cow drink nothing, but holy water, which makes his milk holy! You will be doused by holy milk and burn!" Said Matilda.
"Yeah I've lived for over a thousand years and fought a ton of crazy powerful creeps and I'm not going to be done in by a dumb cow." Said Marceline as she laid her ax on the ground.
"Well his not the only one your dealing with. Behold the Bazooka of Babylon!" Said Matilda as she pulled out a white bazooka, with gold lines on it and fired.
A white missile with angel wings flew out towards Marceline, but she dodged it. Marceline then used her incredible speed to dodge some more missiles and some milk from Holy Cow. She raced towards Holy Cow got behind him and forced the beast on all fours. The vampire then grabbed the udder and furiously began to milk Holy Cow! Holy Cow cried out in dismay as his body became scrawny and thin. Marceline finished milking the beast and Holy Cow fell to his side and exploded into white light.
"Ok that tears it! I'm going to fight you now!" Said Matilda.
"It's about time." Said Marceline as she picked up her ax.
Matilda reached down for some tiny spires on the roof of the Chapel and pulled back hard on them. The Chapel let out a strange sound as it suddenly rose up four long horse like legs. The doors flew open and a large tongue poked out and transformed into a massive drill.
"This is what happens to sinners! Now prepare to face the divine destructive drill of destiny!" Said Matilda as the Chapel charged at Marceline.
Marceline was forced to fly back and keep her distance from the rampaging Chapel as it chased after. She used her strength to throw some rocks, trees, benches, and a few lamppost at the charging monster doing some damage to it. Matilda would occasionally fire missiles at Marceline, but she would dodge them. Marceline directed the monster away from people in the park, but soon realized she couldn't keep the battle contained in the park forever. The park was getting ruined and Marceline needed to end the battle quickly. Matilda was getting frustrated about the battle and decided to pull out a secret weapon. She pulled out a small chest and opened it. Inside the chest was a silver sphere with a gold cross on top of it. The weapon was called the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. Matilda pulled out a tiny book of instructions and began to read them.
"First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."
Matilda pulled out the cross shaped pin and tossed the grenade at Marceline. Marceline saw it coming and swatted it back at Matilda, with her ax. Matilda's eyes went wide as the grenade exploded! Everything was covered in dust for a bit, but it cleared up to reveal a bruised and blackened Matilda, who was slumped backwards and seemed to be unconscious. The Chapel seemed to be dazed and crashed into a large wall surrounding the park. The drill spun the Chapel around a few times before it fell to the ground in a heap.
"Well that's over." Said Marceline as she looked down at the defeated Matilda.
"Well that was a bust. Note to self never hire crazy people again." Muttered Gentleman Wizard as he, Sorceress, and Deceit left the park.
Marceline flew back to join her friends, who congratulated her on her victory.
To be continued.
