Author's Corner

Shout-out to victoriarogue and delaney. nya for their reviews on the previous chapter. I hope you all enjoy this one! These next few chapters have been some of my absolute favourites to write, so I hope you like them, too.

Trigger warning: references to past sexual assault.


EIGHTH BLOOD

Chapter 119: The offering

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"What is the purpose of this . . . Awakening Ritual?"

Asuka tasted blood in her throat.

"I asked you a question, human."

His impertinent tone made her chest burn with fury. "It doesn't concern you," she spat.

"It does if your master has found a way to harness the power of the kami," he countered.

"Who said anything about the kami?"

His mouth twitched. "I almost forgot. You people only believe in one god, don't you?"

"We believe in many gods," she corrected angrily.

"But you only worship one."

She bit her tongue to prevent herself from leaking any more confidential information. A metallic taste filled her mouth, painting the inside of her throat red with contempt.

The Daiyoukai's eyes remained glued to hers despite her nakedness. He didn't seem fazed by it in the slightest, even as she sauntered towards him in a vaguely seductive manner before bending to retrieve her whip. He made no attempt to stop her, nor did he allow his gaze to stray from her face.

His indifference annoyed her. Was he some sort of eunuch? He must be, she thought. How else could he resist the temptation without even breaking so much as a sweat?

A part of her was relieved by his lack of interest – she might not have been able to overpower him otherwise – but she was also terrified of it. Lust made people lose control of themselves. It was easier to get the upper hand when one's foe was distracted with sinful thoughts and desires, provided that you acted quickly. It was a dangerous game, and if you weren't fast enough . . .

Still, Asuka had learned her lesson. After the assault, she hadn't let her guard down once. Not even around her own men. They were her comrades, her brothers in arms, her friends. But that didn't mean she trusted them.

"You're crying," the Daiyoukai said matter-of-factly.

"No, I'm not," she quarrelled.

He narrowed his eyes. "Yes, you are. I can smell your tears."

Blinking rapidly, she lifted her whip from the ground and rose to her full height. He didn't seem remotely concerned that she might use it on him. Was he a fool as well as a eunuch?

"Do me a favour," she said, sliding the ring off her index finger. "If you see Octavia, tell her it's not too late to change her mind. The Commander is prepared to pardon her numerous crimes against the Church if she agrees to fight alongside us in the coming war. However, if she refuses . . . She should consider sleeping with one eye open."

The Daiyoukai laughed.

Asuka paused with the ring balanced between her thumb and forefinger. "I'm serious. Our leader doesn't take kindly to traitors—"

"Neither does mine."

It was her turn to laugh now. "Don't be ridiculous. Your stupid warlord wouldn't last five seconds against a god."

He shot her a taunting smile. "Then it's a good thing we have one, too."

Scowling, Asuka rolled the ring between her fingers. She had to do it eight times or else the spell wouldn't work. Eight turns—one for each incarnation of Erem's Vessel. Technically, there were nine, but Octavia didn't count. As far as the Church was concerned, she was just a piece of Augustus that had broken off by accident.

After the eighth turn, the ring expanded and a gate opened in the gap. Asuka heard the Daiyoukai's sharp intake of breath as the ring whistled and spun behind her. His wings fanned outwards defensively as he sprung to his feet, but it was already too late.

She wasted no time vaulting over the metal rim and into the schism, leaving her would-be-captor in the dust.

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The half-moon was out and shining as Rin skulked through the bushes towards the abandoned shrine in the east garden. It was a small wooden shack with zigzag-shaped streamers hanging motionlessly from the eaves. Much like the rest of the shrine, the paper was old and worn, and moss was flowering between the cracks in the wood.

Inside was a bronze statue of the goddess Amaterasu. Rin tiptoed onto the threshold and peered up at the idol cautiously. It looked different in the dark. Its features were new and unfamiliar. Eerie, even. And worst of all, the goddess's vacant eyes seemed to follow her every move.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when the shoji doors crunched shut behind her.

"Sorry," Koga whispered, wincing as the floorboards creaked beneath his feet. "The wood's all rotten. I didn't mean to startle you."

Rin turned and wrapped her arms around herself for warmth. She felt incredibly cold all of a sudden.

"You came," she said.

He scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "Well, yeah. You asked me to."

"I know. I just wasn't sure if you'd show up after . . ." Her pulse quickened at the memory of their last encounter.

"Fair enough," he said to fill the silence. "So, what's up? Your note said it was urgent. Wouldn't it have been faster to write it down or—"

"Sesshoumaru-sama knows about us."

Koga's jaw tensed. Rin's did, too. She wished she hadn't referred to them as an 'us', but what else could she have said?

"That noise we heard," Koga pondered. "Was it him?"

She shook her head. "I don't think so. Someone must have told him."

"Shit." He folded his arms across his chest and paced the width of the shrine. "Is he angry?"

"He seemed more disappointed than angry. He said that humans and demons aren't compatible because of their conflicting lifespans." She left out the part where Lord Sesshoumaru had accused her of being in love with Kohaku.

"What did you say?" Koga asked.

"I told him to mind his own damned business," she answered with an air of pride. "It went better than expected, all things considered."

He snorted. "That's only 'cause it was you saying it, Rin. Anyone else would've gotten their head bitten off. Literally and figuratively."

He had a point. Few people could get away with speaking to Lord Sesshoumaru like that and walking away unscathed. He'd even gone out of his way to assure her that an arranged marriage wasn't in the cards for her, and never would be without her explicit consent.

His reasons for not wanting to play matchmaker had been similarly surprising.

Daiyoukai lead long lives. Humans, however, do not. You are only alive for a few short decades, then you wither and decay. Imagine watching that happen to someone you care for.

Rin turned to face the statue and gazed into the goddess's unblinking eyes. "What's it like?" she asked.

"What's what like?"

"Immortality."

Koga didn't answer right away. "I dunno how to explain it," he admitted. "It just kind of . . . is. You'd understand if you were one of us." He must have seen her fists clench because he quickly added, "I didn't mean it like that. What I'm trying to say is – it ain't something I've given a great deal of thought to. Maybe I would've felt differently if Kagome had agreed to marry me, but it still wouldn't have changed anything. Sesshoumaru is right about humans and demons not being compatible in the long run. It sucks, but that's the way the world works. It's been that way for as long as I can remember."

"There must be some exceptions."

"How can there be when a mortal lifespan is only a fraction of an immortal one?"

Rin's heart throbbed painfully. She couldn't help but think of Lord Sesshoumaru and Octavia laughing together on the engawa.

You could spend the rest of your life with Koga if you wanted to, but he cannot spend the rest of his with you.

Her eyes stung with tears. She felt like such a brat. Lord Sesshoumaru had tried to make her understand, but she hadn't wanted to hear it.

Dying was easy. They weren't the ones who had to remember. The ones who truly suffered were all the people they left behind.

"I'm leaving," Koga muttered.

"You don't have to," said Rin. "No one ever comes here—"

"That's not what I . . ." He sighed. "I'm leaving the stronghold tomorrow, at first light. And I'm not coming back."

"Oh."

He shrugged. "It's the best course of action right now. I would've liked to say goodbye to Kagome and the mutt, but I'll see 'em again someday."

A tense pause ensued.

"You seem disappointed," he remarked.

She didn't answer.

"I thought you'd be over the moon—"

"Can I ask you something?" she interrupted, finally tearing her eyes away from the statue to meet his. She didn't wait for him to respond—couldn't risk her nerves fizzling out prematurely. "Did you mean what you said? About me being beautiful?"

"You know I did." His throat bobbed. "Why?"

She found herself thinking about that story Octavia had told her. The one about her boyfriend, though he'd been more of a man than a boy. I'm the same age that she was, Rin told herself. The knowledge boosted her confidence by just the right amount.

"Do you . . . remember your first time?"

"My first time doing what?"

She gave him a knowing look.

Koga's eyes widened. "W-Why do you ask?"

"Was it scary?"

"Not really," he mumbled, averting his gaze.

Rin picked at the sleeves of her kosode. The stronghold had been liberated months ago, but she could still feel the usurper's claws dragging across her skin, and the cold bite of his mouth on her virgin lips.

"I'm asking because I don't want to be caught off guard again," she explained. "Everyone always says that your first time should be with someone special, but that's not how things work. Not in the real world. It's not all silk sheets and rose petals, is it? It's tough. Tenderness is a luxury, not a given. And not everyone will treat you gently."

The soldier whose head she'd smashed in with that pot certainly hadn't. She dreamed about him sometimes, but the majority of her nightmares revolved around a different monster.

"Tsunayoshi wouldn't have been gentle. If Sesshoumaru-sama hadn't killed him . . . I don't want my first time to be with someone like that. I want it to be with someone I trust, or at least feel comfortable with. But most of all, I want to get it over and done with. I know that some pain is inevitable—"

"Not necessarily," Koga interjected. "Not if you know what you're doing."

"Which I suppose you do?" She tried to sound alluring, but her pink cheeks and shaky voice ruined the illusion somewhat. "W-Would you show me?"

His silence only served to further accelerate her heartbeat.

"It doesn't have to mean anything," she babbled. "I won't expect anything from you afterwards. I'm not exactly an expert, but I'm a fast learner, and . . . Please, Koga. I don't know who else to turn to."

He sighed again. "I think I've done enough damage, don't you?"

"But I'm asking you to—"

"And I'm saying no."

He lifted his gaze from the floor and locked eyes with her. His reprimanding stare filled her with rage. "Oh, now you want to claim the moral high ground? It's a bit late for that, don't you think? You've already kissed me twice."

"That was a mistake."

Hurt exploded in her chest. "You could have fooled me."

Why didn't anyone want her? First, Kohaku hadn't even thought to make a pass at her before trying it on with a demoness, and now Koga was rejecting the invitation to lay with her. Was there something wrong with her? What did others have that she didn't?

Koga's expression turned remorseful. "Don't look at me like that. Just listen for a sec, will you? I know you're upset. I would be, too. I'm sorry, Rin. Believe me, I am—"

"I don't want your apology," she grumbled, turning her back to him. "Anyway, it's fine. Let's just pretend this conversation never happened, okay?"

She sneaked a peek at the statue's face and resisted the urge to grimace. Hopefully the real goddess wasn't watching through its bronze eyes. That would be even more embarrassing.

"You ever been in love?" Koga asked suddenly.

She blushed harder. "Excuse me?"

"It's supposed to feel different when it's with someone you love," he said. "Not that I would know."

She couldn't bring herself to look at him. "What are you implying?"

"I ain't implying nothing. I just figured it's something you should know, since you were asking about it."

That's one way of putting it.

Rin nodded absently. "In that case, I'll be sure to remember it."

He chuckled.

Tilting her head sideways, she saw that he was smiling at her. It wasn't a mocking smile, either. This one was warm and genuine.

"What?" she demanded, feeling self-conscious again.

"Nothing," he laughed. "You're gonna drive 'em crazy, you know?"

"Who?"

"Boys, girls, whatever takes your fancy. Trust me, they ain't gonna be able to resist you, Rin." He smiled wider. "And who knows? Maybe some already can't."

Her vision blurred around the edges. He's an idiot, she thought, suppressing a smile of her own. But even idiots knew how to be charming sometimes.

She followed his gaze to the altar beneath the statue's feet. There was only one offering—a small wooden box full of copper coins. It looked like it had been there for a while, if the coating of dust and cobwebs was anything to go by.

"I had no idea that Amaterasu was so highly revered in the West," Koga said, before glancing up at the broken roof. "Or used to be, I guess. I always figured that Sesshoumaru would be into more nocturnal-based superstitions – since his mother is from Moon Country – but why else would this shrine be here?" Crouching, he reached over and carefully brushed the cobwebs away with his hand. "Who do you think left these coins?"

"I don't know," Rin answered honestly. "I come here when I want to be alone, and I've never run into anyone else before."

Koga reached into the pot and plucked out a coin. "They must have been left here a long time ago. Look how rusty they are."

Rin studied the bright blooms of turquoise on the surface of the coin. "That's not rust," she said. "Copper doesn't rust. The green stuff is just a reaction to its environment. It can sometimes take up to thirty years for copper to change from its natural reddish-brown to that distinct bluish-green colour."

He seemed impressed by her knowledge of the subject. "You sure know your metals."

Her cheeks felt warm again. "Not really. Kohaku told me about it once. He used to help out in the forge a lot at his old village. Before it was destroyed by Naraku's demons."

"Now there's a name I haven't heard in a while." He tossed the coin back into the pot. The clink's echo reverberated around the shrine like the tolling of a bell. "How long has it been since you all defeated him?"

"About seven years, give or take a few months."

"That long, huh? It feels like it was only yesterday." He smiled faintly. "I remember when the news of what'd happened reached our pack. It was like everyone had been holding their breaths the whole time, and we could finally breathe again."

Rin recalled experiencing a similar feeling herself. "Why didn't you stay and fight with us?"

His expression turned melancholy. "I wanted to, but without the jewel shards in my legs . . . I would've just held you back."

"You would have been more of an asset than I was," she pointed out. "I only survived because Kohaku and the others were there protecting me."

"You really care about him, don't you?" Koga asked, tilting his head to look at her. "The taijiya, I mean."

Is Kohaku no longer a viable candidate for your affections?

Rin's palms began to sweat. "What gave you that impression?"

"You always talk about him so fondly. I can tell you really look up to him."

Her heart was pounding. She didn't bring him up that often, did she?

I am not blind either, Rin.

"He's my best friend," she whispered.

Koga nodded wordlessly. Rising to his feet, he swivelled around and gave her a curious look. It suddenly occurred to her that they might not see each other again. Not in her lifetime, anyway. A part of her was relieved, but the other half was unhappy with the way things had ended between them.

"I guess this is goodbye, huh?" said Koga. "Still, don't be a stranger. I know you'll probably never forgive me, but if you ever need anything—"

"You're right," she cut him off. "I can't forgive you. Even if I wanted to, I just can't." He must have sensed that she had more to say because he made no attempt to move from where he was standing. She exhaled slowly, then murmured, "But I am done hating you."

His brows lifted in surprise. "You are?"

She nodded. "Yes."

Koga grinned and stood a little straighter, as if an immense weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He bowed his head in silent farewell, before exiting the shrine and leaving her alone with the goddess statue.

When it came time for her to leave as well, she opted to remove one of her more expensive hairpins and drop it into the box of green-tinted coins. She flashed the statue a tiny smile as she pressed her hands together and uttered a short prayer. All the while, the pin sparkled up at her, blinking in and out of existence like a star at dawn's first light, or the sun beating down on a butterfly's wings.

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