Author's Note: Thanks for the message in February, Guest. I didn't think anyone was reading this one anymore. :) Grad school full-time (my program doesn't offer part-time) year-round has been tough while also working full-time. I just graduated this week, so I plan to spend more time writing again!
I listened to Shadow by Livingston while writing Sleet's scene.
"Lord Milori."
He turned from where he inspected new basket deliveries in Winter the next morning. "Silvermist. What are you doing over here?" He handed an ice tablet to Sled and walked over.
"It's Sleet. Where is this new healer? Sleet comes home at night haunted and exhausted. He refuses to tell me what happens or what they talk about, but these sessions are doing something awful to him."
With raised eyebrows, he frowned. "I believe the healer resides in Winter near the North Woods—"
"Where no one would hear screams." It was more of an observation than accusation.
Lord Milori's pale face grew whiter, if possible.
"What do you and the Queen know of him?"
He turned away to Sled. "Take over. I need to go." Then he summoned Blizzard. "We need to see the Queen and Healer Spruce. The new healer, Hydro—"
"Hydro? Shouldn't he have a winter-themed name?"
A shrug answered as they climbed on Blizzard. "I don't have a winter name. He knew a lot about Alamur medicine. Said he got caught on an Alamur ship for a month before he was born and learned many of their ways, like how you were caught in a doctor's window. He said he knew what that frenzy was that happened to Sleet, and he could examine him. I had no idea that Sleet was still seeing him."
They landed at the Palace and she followed him in. "But, how could a Bright Fairy be exposed to Alamur without going mad, especially before birth? Pixie dust is part of what kept you and the Lost Nine from going insane. Hydro wouldn't have had enough pixie dust until he was born."
Lord Milori slammed to a halt. "What do you mean pixie dust kept us sane?"
"That's what Sleet told me one night. That if you and the Lost Nine would've lost enough dust, but not all of it, you would've gone insane from the evil of the Alamur. Bright Fairy minds couldn't handle constantly witnessing that much evil for a month."
"Clarion!" he shouted and ran for the throne room.
She repeated everything once the Queen and Healer Spruce were present.
"Milori, get some soldiers to come along. Spruce, bring your medical bag. And I want you to check that Hydro doesn't have Alamur sugar in him. Something felt off about him, but I couldn't put my finger on it. And why is a Winter fairy named Hydro?" the Queen said to no one in particular.
Silvermist stepped closer as the males left. "Do you think he uses water torture? That's why he's named Hydro?"
The Queen's eyes widened. "What's water torture?"
"Waterboarding, t—" She stopped when the Queen looked confused. "Sleet sometimes has nightmares about his past. He's told me only the less cruel things that Alamur do. He looks physically exhausted. I…I'm scared that he's being tortured thinking somehow that it'll help get 'Alamur' out of him. He's been more and more reserved the past few weeks like something's wrong, but he won't talk about it. I've had a terrible feeling since he left this morning that he's going to be injured today."
The Queen captured her hands and met her eyes. "We will find Sleet and bring him back to the palace to talk to him. Hydro will be detained until we figure out what's going on. I know this is the last thing you'll want to do, but it's important that Hydro isn't aware of Sleet's baby. Wait here until we return."
Another surge of electricity zapped up every nerve from the electrodes on his temples and the base of his wings, erupting a scream of pain. Muscles contracted so hard that involuntary tears fell from the corners of his eyes and his jaw clamped down on the tree bark strapped around his mouth to prevent broken teeth. Sweat soaked his clothes. The twisted part was each shock seemed to make his glow light up the underground hovel brighter.
His chest heaved as the hum of the electrocution machine died down. Every muscle burned from overuse. If not for being strapped down to a wooden table, he'd have rolled over and vomited from the agony.
Healer Hydro walked over to look down. A finger touched the pulse at his neck. "We've pushed the voltage as high as I dare without killing you or causing brain damage. I watched this burn the Darkness out of Alamur, but it seems to be making it stronger in you. Perhaps it's because you're the king." The winter fairy looked slightly ill as he removed the tree bark strap. "No more."
"No," he panted, his voice weak. "You have…to find a way to get…the Darkness out so I don't hurt Silvermist. I…went into some kind of frenzy…last week and could've killed her or the Queen."
Hydro shook his head, causing his long white ponytail to sway. "You convinced me to take you to the brink of death in ways that make me sick to think about to see if the Darkness could be killed. I told you this was the last attempt." He undid the leather restraints.
"Please. One more. Maybe drugs and tortures are the wrong thing because they're evil." He slowly sat up with Hydro's help as his head swam and stomach churned from a migraine. "What about the purest form of love and joy in the world?"
"What?" Hydro frowned.
"A mother's tear of unconditional love the first time she holds her baby. Inject me with it."
His eyes widened. "Just touching it would likely kill an Alamur. I'm not injecting you with it! Besides, how would a fairy even get a human tear?"
"Not a human tear—the Queen's tear from when the Princess was born. The Queen kept a vial of some of her tears from the birth in case they're ever needed to heal the Pixie Tree. Just use one drop."
"Are you mad?! That must be thrice as powerful as a human's! No! Absolutely not! Plus, it's stealing from the Queen!"
He stumbled down from the table.
It had been hours of agony trying to find Sleet. And he had barely been alive when he'd been found with the Queen and Hydro in Winter, all three of them unconscious.
Silvermist couldn't stand it a moment longer. Sitting beside Sleet's hospital bed, emotions kept bouncing from rage to tears of grief to confusion to numbness and then start all over again.
Sleet remained unconscious, which Healer Spruce said was expected. It was impossible to look away, but at the same time she couldn't stand being near Sleet right now.
"Silvermist," Healer Spruce's voice interrupted the silence and footsteps approached.
Still, it was impossible to look away.
"Your back must be hurting in that chair after two hours. He's stable. Why don't you go get lunch and take a break?"
"Why would he need electric shock therapy?" The voice that came out was hollow and emotionless.
"He doesn't," Spruce said softly and squatted beside the chair, just within peripheral vision.
"And you're certain he doesn't have brain damage?"
"His brainwaves are good and his seizure was very short. We'll know for certain when he wakes up, but I don't expect brain damage."
A hand rested on her arm, but there was no desire to move or look away from Sleet. "Lord Milori said Hydro was shocking Sleet daily with the intent to remap his brain from an Alamur to a Bright Fairy, and to kill the Darkness." The room started to glow red as her jaw clenched tighter with each word. "If he seizured every day, it wouldn't cause damage?"
"Silvermist, the Queen is able to heal certain conditions—"
"On Alamur?" hissed out, already knowing the answer.
Spruce kept quiet.
"Is this a step toward suicide?" Her nails slowly eased from biting into her palms as the rage transitioned to numbness.
"I don't believe so." He released a deep sigh. "But I think he's going to a dark place and needs help."
"It's the baby and I, isn't it? He's not meant to have a mate or baby, and it's too much with trying to live in a Bright Fairy kingdom."
"Hydro and the Queen are beginning to wake up. We don't know yet what happened. The burn marks on Sleet's temples and back indicate electric shock therapy, but maybe there was some kind of accident. Even if it is somehow you or the baby—"
"No," Sleet croaked and his eyes slowly opened and looked around. Then his head turned and he met her eyes. "It's not you or the baby." He held out a hand.
His face blurred behind tears of relief.
Spruce went around to the other side of the bed and started recording vitals. "What happened? Were you electrocuted?"
"The Queen dropped one of her tears from the Princess's birth on my chest to see if it might kill the Darkness—" Sleet began.
"What?!" Her hands flew to her mouth, trying to not sob. "You're allergic to chocolate! What do you think the purest form of love and joy would—"
"Silvermist," Spruce warned, "you need to stay calm for the baby."
Grief reflected in his eyes. "I can't risk a frenzy like that happening again. I could've killed you—"
Swallowing hard, she stood and looked down at him. "I love you, but I'm so furious with you." A tear dropped from her lashes to splash on the floor. "You promised.." her voice cracked, "that you'd never suicide. You can't tell me that you didn't know you likely wouldn't survive that."
His throat convulsed in a hard swallow, as if her tears caused him pain.
"I love you, but I can't be here right now." Then she swept out.
The cricket on the heart monitor chirped, but it felt like his heart stopped beating the moment she left. She'd be back at any second. When she was angry, she yelled—or tried to yell. For the first time in weeks, he felt her glow—it was a searing pain as if it ripped his chest in two. Silvermist had a broken heart.
"Captain, take a breath."
Spruce had been forgotten about. He suddenly gulped in air, and the cricket's chirp picked up speed again.
Night fell. Silvermist didn't return.
Fawn and the others showed up at sunset where she sat on a bench in the empty hospital gardens.
"Oh, sugar, Lord Milori said Sleet's hurt and in the hospital and you might need hugs. He said the Queen and Hydro are being released from the hospital. Healer Spruce said he thought you might be out here. Don't cry. Sleet's a strong thing." Rosetta set a hand on her back. "Sled says the Captain survived terrible wounds in the Alamur War, and he's made it through Alamur attacks. Bust my bonnet, you'd think he was an Alamur with everything he survives."
That only made her weep harder.
Vidia came over and knelt to take her hands. "Get it out. We're here."
Those unexpected words of support from Vidia made her throw her arms around her neck and sob out all the worry, fear, and anger.
Tink set a hand on her shoulder. "You know this isn't your fault, right? The Captain had his reasons for not telling you about the sessions, and everyone thought Hydro could be trusted like all the other healers. I know about regret, and it doesn't do any good. Focus on helping him get better."
Fawn rubbed her back from behind. "I helped rehabilitate some animals that were in a human lab. They had things done similar to the Captain. The best thing is to help teach them to trust and they're safe and you're a safe place. You're in shock right now having seen him like that."
"Hydro is twisted from those hideous Alamur, but Sleet will be alright."
"The world would be better off if all the Alamur had faded in the war."
The comments kept flowing until she exploded, "He's the king of the Alamur! Of course he'll survive because the tortures strengthened his glow! But it was done because he's an Alamur!" Her chest heaved with years of pent-up anger.
Everyone was dead silent with huge eyes staring back.
"He's so ashamed and scared of himself that he had Hydro cook his brain! His leg was injured because the Alamur kidnapped and tortured him, which led to his back breaking and paralysis! He's the one who found the Lost Nine, transfusing himself with Alamur sugar to hunt them before they were murdered. Transfusions are horribly painful and dangerous, yet he keeps transfusing back with Bright Fairy sugar to not hurt us! I will not have my husband be ashamed of himself anymore! He is an Alamur, but he's not one of them!"
"Oh dear," a deeper, feminine voice said from behind.
The fairies turned.
Queen Clarion landed with Lord Milori. "That answers if we should tell everyone," the Queen sighed.
"You knew?" Tink gasped.
"Of course she did," Lord Milori snorted. "She's the Queen."
"Not a word to anyone, not even mates," the Queen ordered. "The Captain deserves privacy in the hospital. From there, we'll figure out when to announce it. I need to talk with him. Do you want to come, Silvermist?"
Like always, the Queen somehow knew something was amiss. Her brow furrowed in a way that suggested it was an invitation to walk slowly into the hospital to give time to talk.
Fawn and Tink helped her stand. She fell into step beside the Queen without a word. The anger had died again already to return to numbness. At least numbness kept the pain away.
Upon rounding a hedge that blocked view of everyone, the Queen stopped and turned. "That's a lot of sadness for a water fairy."
"A siren," she corrected in barely a whisper, the word coming out vile and hateful.
"Who was raised in a Bright Fairy world and has talents like a Bright Fairy does." Her delicate hands folded in front of her waist. "I can take some of that sadness away. It won't change the anger, but it'll help to not feel so awful."
An irritated glance was all she could muster.
Lord Milori remained soldier straight with his legs spread a bit to brace and his hands behind his back, a step behind the Queen to guard her back, like always when on the clock. When after work and they thought no one saw, he always walked beside the Queen. "There's no shame in letting your Queen help when dealing with something this difficult," he slowly offered.
The anguish mounted stronger and stronger. Memories kept flashing as her nails bit painfully into her palms. There had been so many signs. He'd been drowning and she hadn't seen it. Emotions were too strong to contain. Her wings slowly unfolded. Guilt slammed and the Queen blurred behind tears. Sleet had seemed so invincible. The questions that should've been asked.
Her wings opened in panic.
The hints that he was falling to his knees that hadn't been seen. The word choices that hadn't been heard.
Anguish made it harder to breathe.
All the things that should've been said. All the things that she should've done. All the things he'd needed that she hadn't known. All the—
Collapsing onto her hands and knees, a scream of grief ripped out.
Birds and butterflies shot to the skies. Water drops from nearby puddles trembled from their mistress's turmoil.
"Why would he hurt himself like this?" sobbed out as her forehead touched the ground and her wings drooped over the grass in defeat.
"Silvermist—" the Queen's hand touched her shoulder.
Strong arms pulled her up in a firm embrace, and a bare chest supported her limp body. "Shhh, dewdrop," a rough voice rumbled against her ear. "Come here, this is too much sadness for you to handle." Sleet held her tight against his heart and cupped to ease her head onto his shoulder.
Panic slammed that him absorbing this would be too much and threaten suicide in him. Wings frantically beat and she pushed and struggled as his arms tightened.
"It's alright, sweetheart," he promised calmly, keeping her tucked close to his chest. One hand caught a wing and eased it closed before capturing the other, his Alamur strength too much to fight. "It won't harm me, but it's starting to drive you to depression," he said in a low tone, his breath stirring strands of her hair. "Let me feel your love, and I can make these terrible feelings go away without the Darkness coming."
The struggle ceased and her arms curled around his massive chest. "You can't ever suicide or let someone hurt you." His glow burned hotter and helped melt away the depth of these terrible emotions, making it easier to breathe again.
Sleet's eyes were closed where he reclined in the hospital bed later that evening. She gave a light knock on the door to let him know Tink and everyone had arrived to visit.
He woke up and immediately dug through the blankets for his eye patch.
"Wait here." She hurried into the room to still his hands. "They know about your heritage."
Panic flashed through his face as he paled. "What?"
"It's alright—"
He ripped his hands away and frantically dug through the sheets for his eye patch as Silvermist nodded for everyone to enter.
The moment his hand locked around the eye patch, Fawn set a hand on his arm on the other side of the bed. "That's a choking hazard to a baby," she teased.
He froze and kept his eyes down to prevent anyone from seeing the mismatched blue and brown iris that marked an Alamur.
Rosetta came forward and leaned over the edge of the bed to catch his eye. "You need ta stop gettin' in the hospital, honey. You protectin' all of us all the time explains why this room is your second home." She grinned.
He still didn't move or look up, but the cricket chirped faster as his heart rate rose.
The others came over with gentle banter until it was only Tink standing across the room.
His glow brightened, earning murmurs of surprise. "Take her out. She's frightened," he growled under his breath, still not moving.
"I could tell you had a secret. And that I'm not your favorite fairy," Tink said slowly. "I know it's only because you worry if one of my inventions might hurt Silvermist. Instead of causing disasters, I want to be a hero, like you. Silvermist isn't the best liar and adores you, so I knew you did something heroic every time you got hurt. It's why I made walkers and canes and inventions." She took a step closer. "When you see your idol, it's exciting. When you find out he's a bigger hero than you realized, it makes you nervous if you will ever measure up."
His eyes flew up to Tink in surprise. "I'm no hero. I'm the King of Horrors, the evilest fairy in existence. I've murdered rulers and innocent civilians."
She came a bit closer. "I bet that was before you came here. I've heard horrible stories about the Alamur world. You probably didn't know that love existed, did you? I saw last week. You ran into me and I could see your eyes weren't... You smelled me and then pulled me to my feet before you were gone again. If you were going to be dangerous, it would've been then." She stopped beside the bed. "I've known for a week that you're an Alamur and haven't told your secret. I have an idea. I asked the Queen about it. I want to start a female self-defense class. And who better to teach it than the King of Alamurs?" She grinned.
He blinked. "Pixie Hollow is safe. Aside from bats and hawks, females are safe here to wander even at night."
"I know. It's not really about safety, it's about building confidence. Especially new females are very self-conscious and nervous—"
"And who is a bigger teddy bear with females than you?" Fawn nudged his shoulder. "You try to growl, but you're not as scary as you think."
"I'm brash and short-tempered and—"
"And anyone who has seen you with the Princess or Silvermist knows you're a softie inside," the Queen said.
Everyone turned to the doorway to face the Queen and bowed as she approached the bed.
Spruce walked in and stopped short. "Is this a party? Everyone out. The Captain needs rest, and Silvermist doesn't need any more excitement today and to go into labor." He shooed everyone out except the Queen and Lord Milori. "If it's distressing news, not today. His heart threw some arrhythmias when we got him back into bed, so I want him kept quiet."
The Queen nodded and set a hand on Sleet's shoulder. "We'll talk about Hydro later." She looked down at his scarred wrists. "I've informed the General that you aren't to be arrested and silver is to be kept away from you."
He looked away and replied gruffly, "I gave every indication of hunting you—"
"And have had every opportunity to take me down for over a century but haven't. Right this moment you could do it before anyone could react. I don't fear you because there is nothing to fear, Captain. Yet to those that threaten us, you are an army of one. When the Princess was born, I asked Milori if you could be her bodyguard."
His brow furrowed and he frowned at the Queen. Guarding the future queen was the highest honor a soldier could have, even more so than guarding the current queen.
"It is because you can't be in the summer heat for too long that you weren't given the position. As her winter talents emerge and she grows old enough to wander to other seasons, I will ask that you keep her safe." Her voice grew thick. "It is One whom I ask to keep her alive; it is Sleet whom I ask to watch over her once the General and I have faded." Then her shoulders straightened and she cleared her throat. "I'm not an idiot, Captain. I didn't choose a monster to lead the warm and winter fairy armies with the General. Should I hear of you doing something so stupid again as to let someone convince you that you're a threat to us, I will personally knock sense into your head. I'm so sorry for how I misjudged you." Then she leaned over and kissed his brow. "You are an honorable fairy, Sleet," she whispered and leaned her forehead to his in a private, peaceful moment.
His bottom lip quivered as he closed his eyes.
Curling up to him on the hospital bed at sunset after everyone left, she rested her belly on his hip. He held on tight in silence. So much weight hung in the air with things that needed to be discussed.
"You could have faded," she whispered and stroked his chest through the hospital gown.
"Alamur use electrocution as torture and in army training. I thought I was strong enough for it to not be dangerous because a Bright Fairy was doing it, so it couldn't possibly be at levels I'd experienced before," he replied quietly and wrapped his fingers around her hand on his chest. "He said that he knew how to get the 'evil' out of me forever—"
"You're not evil," she whispered, turning her face into his chest.
He kept silent for a moment, as if disagreeing but hesitant to cause her upset. "I'm terrified that the frenzy will one day turn on you or the baby. During the delirium from my wing, I thought I'd killed you. I can't take this fear anymore. I wake up every night from nightmares of hurting you or to check that I haven't done something to you."
Breath froze on her lips. "You don't want to be my mate anymore?" Was such a thing as splitting up possible for mates?
"What? No, I don't want to be an Alamur anymore. It makes me unpredictable and dangerous. That's not a life for a baby or you."
"So you thought electric shocks could change you." Leaning up on her elbow, she looked down at him. "I love who you are, and part of that is shaped by your experiences. I wouldn't know you if your personality changed. Maybe you would love someone else. Is this about the baby? It's like you've been spiraling since the pregnancy—"
"Whoa, dewdrop, no. That's not what I mean." He cupped her face. "You are my world. I'm nervous of becoming a father because she's going to be so tiny and I'm so big and gruff and callous…but I do not want to leave either of you. You give my life purpose." His voice grew hoarse. "This world was built for Bright Fairies. My universe consisted of pain and death and depression—those things live within me in the Darkness. But now knowing what it's like to have joy and companionship and love…it makes the Darkness harder to bear." He swallowed hard, as if knowing this would be hard for her to hear. "There are times when the Darkness hits so fast and hard that I have to hold onto the thought of you to not go insane. Sometimes I can't see beyond the Darkness. And I'm terrified that one day I'll go into a frenzy so dark that it'll blind me to you and I'll hurt you." He pulled her down to cradle on his chest and press a kiss to her hair.
Quiet tears flowed. "Sleet, it feels like everything has been so hard lately with the paralysis and you becoming king. It felt like the entire honeymoon we were pretending everything was fine. I wish we would've talked. Maybe it wouldn't have gotten this bad. Why didn't you tell me what he was doing to you? I thought we're partners."
"We are. With the end of pregnancy coming, I was worried about upsetting you. I thought the shock therapy would just fix things."
"You aren't something to be fix! I need you to talk to me. You're supposed to be out slaughtering the universe as the king, but instead you're mated with a baby coming. Of course you're struggling. I'm not a delicate flower that needs to be protected, and I'm so angry that you treated me like it because it ended up with you here!" The room glowed red from her.
His chest bounced. "Pause for a moment." He started laughing harder. "Dewdrop, you were so hesitant to yell at me when we were courting. Since I've become the most terrifying fairy in the world, you have no trouble taking me to task." When she sat up in indignation, he tugged her back down. "I'm not laughing at you. I love that you're so much more confident and challenge me when I'm being a blockhead. Alright, I will not treat you differently because of pregnancy." His smile faded and he searched her eyes. "I feel like the Darkness is getting more and more out of control. I'm bred to thrive in it, but it's becoming detrimental. I think I need to talk to someone, but I don't even know who I can tell who won't be harmed by the dark things that go through my head more and more lately."
She opened her mouth.
"And before you say you and then we can mate to keep you safe, I'm going to veto you. I've told you some things in the past that have started to affect your glow, but these are worse. Even if not pregnant, I know these would be too much."
"Have you asked the Queen? She gets knowledge about Alamur since you're one of her fairies. Maybe she'll know something about this."
"I'll ask her about it tomorrow."
Tears blurred him. "Don't suicide. Promise me. We'll go to the Mainland or wherever you need to find help. Promise?"
"Shhh, dewdrop." He brushed away a tear that escaped and switched to Korean. "I won't commit suicide. I promise I won't put you through that. We're talking about it now so it doesn't get that bad."
Lying down on him again, a shaky breath escaped. "I'm sorry I let out your secret. I think between the dungeon last week and today, many soldiers have figured it out. I just exploded without thinking when everyone started making insults about Alamur."
He patted her hip. "It was bound to come out eventually. My main worry is if you and the baby will be ostracized for it. We won't solve world problems tonight. Let's go to sleep."
After an hour of being unable to wind down, she heaved a sigh.
"You're awake?" his chest rumbled under her ear.
"Mm hm. You can't sleep?"
"No." Then he slipped out from under her, pulled on his pants, and discarded the hospital gown. "Come, let's go out the window and watch the stars til we get tired." He disconnected the heart monitor wires and gave the cricket and bee a glare when they started to report no heartbeat. Then he held out a hand.
"Sleet, your heart—"
"Has had a normal rhythm for the past four hours. We'll be right outside under the window if there's an emergency." He tugged her up and swung her into his arms.
With a giggle, she opened the window for him and looked down the two stories. "Oh. Your wing is still bandaged."
"Fly on down. I'll be right behind you."
With a hesitant look, she stepped out on the ledge and opened her wings, gliding down. Then she turned to see him climb to sit on the ledge. "Wait!"
But he pitched forward and let his legs collapse to land on his feet and one hand. He stood and dusted off his hand. "Alright, where should we lay?"
She blinked.
He gave a gruff clearing of his throat and glanced away. "It's harder for me to get injured as the King of Horrors now." Then his eyes glided back to her, his posture a bit tense waiting for her reaction.
Biting her lip to hold back a smile, her wings involuntarily gave a slight quiver that shook the feathers whereas her old wings would've fluttered. He looked so strong and big with the moonlight casting perfect shadows over his bare, chiseled torso. Unable to contain the butterflies he caused in her stomach, she stroked her hair that fell over one shoulder. "Does it hurt your back and side to carry me?"
A smile cracked his lips. "No, my side has been fine since you healed it. I can fly for short distances until my wingframe heals more. Why?"
She trotted over on her toes and gave a soft flap of her wings to jump into his arms.
He let out a hearty laugh as he caught her. A naughty grin answered as she wiggled to wrap her legs around his waist. But her belly prevented reaching to kiss. Embarrassment flooded. "This seemed better in my head."
"Oh, dewdrop, any time you want to climb on me is sexy." He grinned like a fool and leaned forward over her belly to close the distance for a kiss. Then he flew her into the trees.
"We can't see the stars," she frowned.
"We'll see the stars later." He laid down and left her straddling him. "Spruce said you shouldn't be flat on your back anymore so the baby gets enough sugar flow."
Her jaw dropped. "You're supposed to be in the hospital for your heart! I'm not mating!"
He cocked an eyebrow with a dry look. "We're fairies; mating heals." Then his eyes narrowed and he set a hand over her heart with a furrowed brow. "You're nervous. Do you not want to? Am I too rough?"
A wave of embarrassment washed up. "Can…?" Courage faded fast, so she simply grabbed his hands and plopped them on the underside of her belly.
He beamed. "Do you need me to support the baby? Is this too uncomfortable? We can change position—"
"No, I just need you to help hold her weight off my back if I'm on top."
"Of course, dewdrop. Tell me whatever you need without being embarrassed. We'll figure out ways to keep you comfortable." He paused for a moment and his breathing grew ragged as he stroked her belly and she shed her dress. "You're extremely beautiful."
A giggle bubbled up. "You just want to mate." Wiggling and using his forearm for leverage didn't help to get settled comfortably.
He pulled his arm free and held out his hands. "Do you need to scoot back?"
"I think I need to lean my hands on your stomach for balance."
"That'll put more strain on your lower back. What if you relax your wings out of the way and lean your hands back on my thighs?"
An awkward minute later, she rolled off with his help and turned away quickly to brush at her eyes.
"Ah, my wife, no tears. We'll figure this out." A kiss pressed under her ear from behind as his arms wrapped around and stroked her belly. "I know it's a lot of physical changes and you're not always comfortable, but it means you're growing a healthy baby. You're beautiful and I'm here with you in this. Talk to me."
A sniffle as she dashed away another stray tear. "There's a couple months left and I already am having trouble moving. I'm not very tall. What if she keeps growing and I can't stand without falling forward? What if I get wider than I am tall? What if I get so big I have to stay in bed for weeks? What if—"
"Oh my, that's a lot of 'what ifs'," he cut in softly and stroked her shoulder. "Spruce said your body will keep her size in check so she doesn't get too big for you to carry. In the unlikely possibility she does get too big, you'll only be in bed for a short time before she's born. I'll be a good waiter to you in the meantime."
"It's not funny." The tears came faster. "What if Healer Spruce has to get her out with surgery? Humans die from that. And why can't I stop crying?!" Turning, she collapsed against his chest into sobs.
"Sweetheart, it's alright," he promised and scooped her into his lap. "If you need surgery, I'll be right there to heal you before the pain meds even wear off, and I'm not going to let anything happen to you or the baby. The tears are just the hormones, and it's been a hard day."
But her arms wrapped around his neck as the sobs came harder.
"Are these water fairy tears?" When she nodded against his chest, he pressed his heart to hers and her glow grew warmer. "It'll be better in a moment, dewdrop," he promised and gently rocked her side to side. "Don't be sad," whispered against her temple and a kiss pressed to her head.
When the tears calmed to sniffles, he let go with one hand to lean over and gathered a pile of fallen dandelion puffs. Then he laid her on her side and laid facing to hold her on the soft makeshift bed. "I love you."
"I love you." A shuttering breath escaped. "Sleet? I'm still sad. I need your glow to fix it, but you can't hold me close with the baby in the way."
"We can get creative so our glows are close enough to take away the sadness." He stroked her cheek.
"Does that mean you'll take the sadness instead?"
With the depth of emotion that water fairies felt, likely so. But it wouldn't be enough to activate the Darkness if she stayed close afterwards. And it was worth anything to not see her this upset a moment longer. "No, dewdrop. We'll keep our glows close afterwards for a bit to be sure, if you wish."
She nodded and he moved to slip behind her. "Humans call this spooning. I shall call you my Little Dipper, sweetheart." His chest pressed against her back and the warmth of her heart aligning with his began to spread. His arm draped around and stroked the baby.
It felt so peaceful and right to hold her so close and feel her glow burning brighter around his. Her fingers interlaced with his on her belly. This was one of those perfect moments that made it impossible to not fall even more in love with her.
"Let me show you how much I love you," he breathed in her ear and brushed a kiss over her neck. Her soft gasp of surprise and the tightening of her hand in his as she moaned his name brightened his glow.
Author's note: Yes, we just saw joy rather than fear brighten Sleet's glow. :)
