Will
"You ruined my glasses."
"I'll buy you another pair."
"I don't want anything that comes from you."
"What did he mean by that?" I ask myself as I recall Nico's words.
But the most important thing is to find out why those words affected me so much. After all, I shouldn't care.
I mean, I hate him, don't I?
I really don't know anymore.
I tried not to think about it during test week, but somehow that scene kept repeating itself in my mind every time I looked at Nico's empty desk. But now the tests are over and I have plenty of time to think.
Today was the last day of school, and Nico was absent again. He's been absent all week. The most boring class week I've ever had in my life.
But finally summer vacation is here.
Summer vacation is here, and instead of enjoying it, I am lying in my bed… Reflecting.
'I don't want anything that comes from you'. This really surprised me. I don't know why. Nico hates me. He really hates me.
'I know you say you don't like Nico, but I know this is not exactly true.' I remember Jason saying.
Is not true? Then what's the truth? If I don't hate Nico, then what do I feel for him?
Knock, Knock, Knock. I hear the knocking on my door.
"Will, dinner is ready. Come eat."
It was just me and my mother, Naomi, at home. My father is traveling on business, and it would be a long time before he comes back home.
"How was school today?" My mother asks.
"Boring."
My mother looks at me, her features show concern:
"You've been saying that a lot lately. Is something bothering you?"
"There's nothing going on. That's why it's boring."
My mother smiles.
"I understand. Well, I have a surprise to tell you that might cheer you up."
I look at her. Surprise?
"We are going to Hawaii," she says excitedly.
"What...?"
"Your father had some business there and now he has some free time during your summer vacation. So he called me saying that he found a wonderful hotel and sent us the tickets so we can join him."
I didn't dare tell my mother that I would rather not go, since she looked so excited.
But… It couldn't hurt, I could use the free time during the trip to organize my thoughts about everything that happened recently.
"When are we going?" I ask.
"Tomorrow. So you should pack your bags already. We will spend most of the summer vacation there."
"OK."
As soon as I get to my room, I start packing.
Before, I was thinking about visiting Nico to check if he recovered from the cold.
But…
Should I visit Nico?
Could I visit Nico?
He would definitively reject to my presence in his home, but I wanted to at least try talking to him and then maybe find the answers to my questions.
Why did it bother me so much when he said he would never want anything that came from me?
What Jason meant when he said he didn't think it was true that I didn't like Nico?
How do I really feel about Nico?
Do I really not know the answer? Or do I just not want to accept it, and so I refuse to acknowledge it?
Since a long time ago, my favorite thing to do has been provoking Nico.
He seems to be expressionless at first glance, seems to be cool, calm and collected, but when he's annoyed, this changes and I… I want to see the different expressions he can make; I want to be the one to provoke these reactions, these expressions.
I mean… when he's angry: he frowns, his cheeks get flushed, he starts pouting and his focus is on me and I can see the transformation… from cold to hot.
I think it's beautiful, and that makes me keep provoking so I can keep seeing it.
Wait. Beautiful?
I had never noticed before, but yes, I think Nico is beautiful.
"Wait. Am I getting this right? You don't want to go to Hawaii?" Jason asks me on the phone.
"Yes, Jason, you got it right. I would like to stay at home during the holidays instead of going to Hawaii." I say grumpy.
I was just finishing packing when Jason called me.
"Then switch places with me. I'll make the sacrifice to go for you."
"Ha, ha, ha. You're so funny." I say.
"Why don't you want to go?" Jason asks me.
I finish closing my large suitcase and start preparing a carry-on bag to take on the plane with me.
"I wanted to sort some things out around here." I speak.
I wanted to see if I could talk to Nico, but I was not going to tell that to Jason or I would not hear the end of it.
"Like what?" He asks curiously.
I pick up some basic hygiene items to put in the carry-on bag:
"Nothing that cannot be postponed. But what are you going to do on vacation since I won't be here?" I ask to change the subject.
Jason doesn't respond immediately. I take the cellphone of my ear and look at the screen to see if the call didn't get disconnected. When I see that it didn't, I put the phone back and only then Jason says.
"Well, I was thinking maybe it's time for me to take the risk and ask Piper out on a date." He says, a little unsure.
My eyes widen with surprise.
"Wow. Really?! Hallelujah! All my prayers have been heard ..." I joke.
"Ha, ha, ha. Now you're so funny." Jason says, repeating what I said earlier.
I start to laugh.
"I'm sorry." I say when I finally stop laughing, but I still have a smile on my face. "But seriously, I think it's great. But what happened to you finally make that decision?" I ask excitedly.
"Well, a guy from senior year asked Piper out, she refused, but ... It was a reality check for me, I mean, she may have rejected this guy, but ... I just don't want to lose the opportunity just because I didn't have the courage to ask. And even if she rejects me, I think our friendship is strong enough to survive it."
"Do not think about being rejected. Even if Piper was not in love with you, which is not the case, I'm sure she would give you a chance, anyway."
"Do you really think she'll say yes?"
"I don't think. I'm sure. Only you don't see how much she's in love with you."
"I hope you're right." He says, sounding hopeful.
"Don't worry. I know what I'm talking about."
"Well, I have to go. Have a nice trip and have fun in Hawaii."
"Although I don't want to go, I think it will be good to spend some time at the beach."
"Of course. Take the time to think about what I said. Bye."
"Bye."
