Chapter LXXXX

Wind of Freedom

TW: Eating Disorder, Mention of Suicide

Lady Tsunade is examining me and looking at the back of my neck. I hold my breath, waiting for her verdict. After another long week in this room, imagining the walls getting smaller little by little, I'm dying to get out. I'm definitely going to end up losing my mind if I stay here one more day…

"It's good. You can leave today, Kakashi," she tells me, to my great relief.

"I'm glad to hear that," I exclaim, smiling. "I was starting to get depressed after more than a month here…"

"I would have kept you a little longer, but…" Godaime looks at my unrecognizable and destroyed room. My apartment is unscathed in comparison… The state of my apartment I fear to discover if I rely on the incident report. Naruto dealt with his stress by clawing more than necessary. There are also teeth marks on some furniture, including the bars of my bed. The floor and walls are massacred with tail slams and punches. Apparently, he got angry more than once, and the staff refuses to tell me why. I guess they don't want me to worry…

"… let's just say that I'd prefer if the room can still be repaired. There's also this smell of death that's starting to spread into the neighbouring rooms… I'm surprised that you didn't die of asphyxiation or air poisoning."

I let out a nervous laugh. "My nose is constantly exposed to it. I guess I don't smell it anymore…"

Yes and no. I regained my sense of smell a long time ago. I feel like my nose is filtering my scent and that of Naruto, which no longer bothers me, even after many baths and keeping the windows open to ventilate the room. By amplifying my sense of smell with chakra, I easily detect and differentiate all aromas, including those of my student. I remember how vile and horrible his body scent was to my sensitive nostrils. I wasn't the only one; it is for absolutely everyone. Since I'm part chakra devourer now, it must have become … normal to me, like a smell is normal and pleasant among the same species.

"Maybe," she sighs before finally removing the venous catheter housed in the crook of my arm. "Although there's no development, we'll continue blood sampling on a weekly basis to be sure."

I nod. This reassures me that my blood is still human, irrefutable proof that I haven't lost my humanity.

"I'm gonna give you a few more days to recover at home," she adds. "Next, we'll probe Naruto's mind."

My blood freezes in my veins. I sincerely fear the consequences this will have on his psyche, given that he will have to confront his traumas. Unfortunately, I can't refuse for him, negotiate and say no. This is necessary. The threat to us and Konohagakure is too great to wait until Naruto is ready to remember anything.

"Indeed," I reluctantly agree, letting out a sigh. "That said, I plan to train him as soon as I recover. Chakra Devourers are endowed with great power and very useful powers. Naruto could become a valuable asset to the village, especially if he relearns how to use his ninjutsu techniques."

"You want to train him to get rid of his fear, don't you?"

I nod. "If he could've fought alongside me, I wouldn't have ended up in this state. Feeding him with my chakra limits my field of action a lot. I'm a sad excuse as a ninja."

"I agree with you. Naruto is strong and unpredictable. He mustn't fall back into the hands of the enemy. They will use him as a weapon against us. He's still mentally unstable, but the hold you have on him is enough to start training."

In addition to training Naruto, I plan to train with him. My useless body is rusty. I lost some muscles, and I need to get back on track. I've done some exercises over the last few days, and it's far from enough. I need to move, get punched and work my cardio. I'm pitiful to see, and I weigh my words.

Suddenly, Lady Tsunade pierces me with her stern little eyes. "If I catch you losing weight again, I'll drag you back here myself by the scruff of your ass. Understood?"

"… Ah-ha. Ha, ha… U-Understood," I say, laughing nervously.

"Good. We'll contact you again when the time comes for Naruto. Ideally, before the next full moon."

I offer a goodbye to the Hokage who leaves my room. There are no words to describe my joy at the idea of leaving the hospital; I'm jubilant. I want to be warmed by the shine of the sun. I want to feel the wind on my skin. I want to smell the last scents of summer, which will soon give way to autumn. Above all, I want to find peace and solitude. I can no longer stand being watched every hour of the day and night; I miss my privacy—something I will no longer take for granted. Despite the dazzling and radiant sun, the outside invites me with open arms, and I can't resist it.

A smile appears on my face, impatient to set foot outside.

"Naruto, get your things and get dressed. We can finally go home."

The teenager jumps and freezes on the spot. With intensity, his eyes look into mine; he doesn't even bat his eyelids anymore. His sudden stillness disturbs me.

"Naruto...? What's—" He takes me roughly in his arms and squeezes me with pain, extracting a faint cry from me. He's crushing me in another embrace of death. Luckily, my breathing isn't cut off. He lets out silent laughs before humming, rubbing his face on me in an uncomfortable way … "… Naruto… You're choking me," I mutter, trying to push him away … in vain.

The blond crushes me for a few seconds. He licks me with his fucking disgusting tongue before releasing me. I wipe my cold forehead and catch my breath as he rushes to the wardrobe to retrieve his belongings. He's even more excited than I am about getting out of here; he's so excited that many hairs stand up on his tail. As usual, he wasn't listening to our conversation, and his brain took a moment to process the information.

I jump up and put on my shinobi outfit. However, Naruto grabs my long-sleeved top to put it on. Without the slightest delicacy, I remove it from his back. "Out of the question! I keep my shirt," I grumble, frowning.

My student frowns in turn. He tries to snatch it from my hands, forcing me to raise my arms so that it's out of reach.

"I said no, Naruto! If you continue your childish tantrum, we stay here another day!"

Annoyed, Naruto crosses his arms and some lightning escapes from his skin. He's sulking, and I don't care. To hide my hideous arms, I need it; I don't want anyone to see them. I ignore Naruto and show him my back to change. I haven't fully recovered my original weight since my muscles have weakened. My body no longer bothers me … unlike my forearms. I cover them with white stripes, the same way as the bottom of my legs. With my gloves, no horrible marks in sight. Perfect.

I hope no one asks me about my nails being too long. I haven't completely adapted to them yet, as if I have hands full of thumbs; I have to relearn how to use my hands for more precise tasks requiring a certain dexterity. They haven't grown since they reached this length. It seems that I don't have to worry about having too long nails; their current length has been the same for two weeks. Also, they are much more resistant. I tried to break one in front of Naruto's horrified eyes, and I couldn't. I didn't insist too much like an idiot either. Let's say that I didn't want to take the risk of tearing it off and therefore, inflicting excruciating pain on myself. I learned my lesson when I cut all ten of my nails like an ignorant man with masochistic tendencies.

With my mask on, my odious secret isn't a problem, and I don't have to worry. These fangs in my mouth don't really bother me. With them, I pierce and tear food without the slightest effort. The sharp tip is formidable, sharp and powerful. I don't want to be bitten by them at all. I accidentally bit myself, and I still suffer from it. The stitches on my tongue are painful and itchy. Eating is torture since I have to avoid my stitches… Maa, as best I can. Unfortunately, they will stay for several weeks given the severity of my injury. At least, Naruto found me melting ones. I won't need to remove them. Aside from a constant fear of stabbing my tongue again, these fangs don't change much in my life.

Meanwhile, Naruto puts on his orange outfit and ties his shinobi headband on his forehead. He doesn't pout anymore. All in all, he's still disappointed, disappointed not to wear my shirt.

Smiling, I put a friendly hand on his shoulder. "Can you get out of here alongside me without being paralyzed with fear, Naruto?"

Without a hint of hesitation, the sapphire-eyed boy clings to my arm. I detect no trace of fear, anxiety or stress in his light-filled eyes. I conclude that he overcame his phobia of the hospital with our extended stay. I smile even more as I ruffle his blond hair. "I'm proud of you, Naruto."

His face more radiant than ever, Naruto follows the pace of my steps. After an eternity, I finally set foot outside. I'm greeted by the wind, the warmth of the sun and the fresh air. My nose is overwhelmed by a thousand and one smells. Freedom is euphoric; I'm immediately intoxicated like a drug. It's such that I'm trembling, and my heart is pounding.

- XxX -

Through the second-floor window, Tsunade watched as Kakashi and Naruto left the Konoha Hospital. The black tail was wagging chaotically in all directions like an overexcited dog. The two stopped for a brief moment. Kakashi pulled Naruto closer by placing his arm around his shoulders. Due to the mask covering the Copy Ninja's mouth, she could not read his lips when he whispered something in the blond's ear, who let out many laughs while smiling. Kakashi smiled in turn when Naruto clung to his arm again. He was no longer bothered by the feral boy's proximity—on the contrary, he increased the physical contact on his own.

Tsunade had immediately noticed that Kakashi was repeating himself in his reports before his hospitalization; he blabbered more than anything else. He reiterated that Naruto was physically invasive and that it was linked to his attachment disorder and trauma. Yet, he sought his affection now. She surprised him more than once asking for Naruto's hand or a hug. He broke physical contact when she came to examine him. Sometimes he was subtle; sometimes not at all. She has known him since he was little. It's not his type; he avoids and rejects any rapprochement, letting absolutely no one enter his bubble.

Obviously, Kakashi had taken a liking to Naruto and developed feelings for him. He was in a position of strength; he could ask the slightest favour from a vulnerable Naruto. But she had no proof of such a thing. Besides, she refused to believe that Kakashi was one of those despicable men. However, this inappropriate love was not what worried the Hokage the most.

One of her fears concerned Naruto. She had a very bad feeling. The demon inside him had awakened and was now threatening the village. Only Kakashi could contain the madness on the verge of unleashing itself, this madness capable of destruction, capable of snatching life, capable of giving birth to other demons… But the worst of her fears concerned the son of her oldest friend. Even today, she could not accept Hatake Sakumo's suicide, although she had mourned him more than twenty years ago. Every time she looked at Kakashi's face hidden beneath his mask, she saw her late friend instead, haunting her like a bad memory. Kakashi was his spitting image with a few differences; seeing his bare face always made her uncomfortable.

She touched the document she was holding with her fingertips. She was about to read its horrible secrets again. However, a familiar presence stopped her.

"You wanted to see me, Lord Hokage?" Shikamaru asked with a formal greeting.

"Indeed," she nodded, watching the two shinobi disappear from her field of vision.

A silence settled in.

"I want you to keep an eye on them, especially Kakashi. We can no longer trust him."

"You noticed that too, right?"

"Long before he was hospitalized," she said, facing Shikamaru. "His reports are inconsistent. There are holes everywhere, and his handwriting is shaky. There are things he doesn't want us to know. This causes a lot of stress for him."

"I don't know the extent of the information he keeps to himself," he added. "Do you think we should confront him and get the answers out of him?"

The Hokage shook her head. "Perhaps it's better this way… As long as the village is infiltrated. The less we know, the less they know. This group is dangerous. They're determined to get their hands on Naruto. They must already be making another plan to get him back…"

Like a dagger to the heart, Shikamaru remembered that fatal night in which his comrade had almost disappeared, in which the Copy Ninja had come close to death. All this because of him, because of his inexcusable negligence. He barely slept at night because of the guilt tormenting him like a poison. Everyone was on guard, and everyone knew that the enemy was waiting for the perfect opportunity to kidnap Naruto.

"If only it was only that," Tsunade said, looking outside. "With this black mark on his neck, Kakashi could very well become a chakra devourer. The village is doomed if we have two unstable, chakra-hungry demons within our walls. This will cause unprecedented general panics. I'm already receiving many complaints and requests to lock them both up."

A short pause and a sigh.

"Naruto has a harmful influence on Kakashi. I'm afraid it's not just his body that's sick. His mind is affected, and his mental state deteriorates dramatically. The right thing to do would be to separate them so that Kakashi can recover and take a break that he honestly needs … but that's impossible. They maintain a toxic dependence on each other."

"Even if we separate them, I don't think it'd change anything," the teenager intervened cautiously. "I believe this mark allows Naruto to control Kakashi-Sensei in some way and subjugate him under his power. They were both far apart when this group attacked. Kakashi-Sensei wasn't at all worried. However, when this mark began to glow blue, he rushed to help him. It's as if Naruto sent him a distress signal or took control of him. Otherwise, that doesn't explain how Kakashi-Sensei immediately found him in the middle of a deserted alley. Besides, Kakashi-Sensei doesn't remember anything. Everything suggests that he was the victim of a mind control spell."

"This possibility can't be ruled out, indeed. That would explain why he doesn't remember anything. Iruka reported that Kakashi seemed completely possessed and that he was giving him chills…" Godaime turned her attention to Shikamaru. "If this mark progresses on his body … we'll have to make decisions, which may be … difficult. If Kakashi completes his transformation into a chakra devourer, he will remain silent."

Shikamaru gasped in surprise. He refused to believe that Kakashi could compromise Konohagakure's security, even if he hid many things. If he became one of these chakra-hungry nocturnal creatures, he would end up locked away, probably before he completed the process considering the Herculean power of these demons. "You… You think so...?"

"That's a certainty," Tsunade said. "Kakashi hasn't been the same since he got this mark. Don't tell me you didn't notice?"

The young shinobi remained silent. He could only agree with Tsunade. Since discovering this mark, Kakashi had changed drastically; perhaps he would refuse to cooperate at all now. Although Shikamaru had shared his assumptions about this ebony mark, he had kept Kiba's observation about Kakashi's body odour to himself. Subconsciously, he wanted to protect Naruto; he would do everything in his power to ensure Naruto did not end up in a cage again.

"Something really bad happened," she continued. "We don't have proof that he smashed the mirror … but since that day, he's different. His gaze became piercing and icy. Something broke in him. It's better that he doesn't know that we know. He must already suspect that we no longer trust him, and Kakashi is far from being an imbecile…"

She turned her back on Shikamaru to look out the window; her eyes scanned the village without any real purpose. "If this mark spreads on his body or if Kakashi seems suspicious to you, you will inform me immediately, Shikamaru. You're the only one able to monitor him without arousing suspicion. Kakashi was part of the ANBU for ten years. Even if I put a shinobi in charge who is capable of hiding his presence and chakra, he will notice and become suspicious. That moron Naruto will take Kakashi's side no matter what, and he'll inform him if they're being followed by someone he doesn't know. With his sick mind, we don't need Kakashi to stop trusting us. He's the only one who can keep Naruto under control."

Shikamaru swallowed and clenched his fists. The situation was serious. The possibility that the Copy Ninja would become a threat to the village could not be ruled out, especially if he was subject to the will of a Naruto who was more unstable and unpredictable than ever. The blond had regained his gentle and curious character, but this darkness lurking within him had awakened, hidden behind his pupils and pierced Shikamaru with its violence. When he met that feral gaze, he felt like a wounded deer facing a bloodthirsty predator; a cold shiver ran through his entire body when it happened. This was one of the reasons why he limited his visits with the duo. Now he hoped that this hidden thing in Naruto was hibernating now that Kakashi was better.

This thing, whatever it was, terrified him every time he saw it.

"Understood," he agreed before leaving.

The sound of footsteps running out of breath in an echo weighs down the already heavy atmosphere. Being the unshakeable pillar of Konoha, Tsunade had to remain straight, imperturbable, with her head firmly screwed on her shoulders. Nevertheless, she was a woman like all the others; she had feelings and moods. She was worried, and that was an understatement. She felt so helpless. She found no explanation and no solution regarding Kakashi.

Her heart sank in her chest as she opened the document to reread what only she knew. Godaime had participated in the first hemoglobin analyses. Her love organ had suddenly stopped when she discovered something. She refused to believe it. She had taken the test several times, convincing herself that she had made a mistake… But she had to accept the truth.

She had found an anomaly in Kakashi's blood… The same anomaly as the one in Naruto's blood.

She didn't know how that was possible, although the answer was obvious. This black mark was the cause. After all, this mark had completely transformed the back of Kakashi's neck. This anomaly in his blood was the reason why she was convinced that Kakashi was becoming a demon himself, that he would end up transforming at one point or another; a time bomb that could not be stopped now. Even if the mark had not changed and the samples showed no other suspicious anomalies, it was only a matter of time.

To protect the village, to protect the only son of her friend dear to her heart, to avoid riots and to ward off the threat posed by Danzô, determined to get his hands on Naruto, she had falsified Kakashi's medical file herself. Tsunade could not trust anyone, not even her disciples, in whom she placed blind trust. This information should not spread, especially among the enemy.

Having observed Kakashi's unstable psyche, she feared his reaction if he learned that his blood had the same anomaly as that of the blond. She had seen the greatest terror in his eyes when she told him about that mark on his neck, betraying the possibility of him becoming a chakra devourer. It was the first time Kakashi had been so terrified. He had turned visibly pale and almost lost consciousness. Of course, the Hokage did not want to resort to drastic measures, just as she did not want to lock Kakashi up … but if he turned into a chakra devourer, she would have no choice.

The safety of the community took precedence over that of a single individual.

Tsunade sighed and closed the document. The sky was blue and the sun was shining. Gray and black clouds proliferated on the horizon, approaching little by little to engulf everything. Instead of a downpour with storms, she saw the announcement of an inevitable catastrophe; the calm before the storm—rather, a hurricane.

Naruto was the key to solving all mysteries, and she could not wait any longer.

If Naruto was so stubborn about remaining amnesiac, the information had to be retrieved by force, no matter the consequences it would have on the sapphire-eyed boy.

There was no other way.


Hellow! A few short words from the author!

I hope this story continues to pique your interest! This chapter closes the fifth book

The sixth book, called "Vigilance", will begin in two or three weeks! (May 24 or 31) I have to take a long break. I want to work on other projects, and the next book will be much longer than the previous ones. In addition, the chapter regarding Naruto's memory is going to take me a lot more time than usual, and it happens quite early.

Thank you for your valuable comments that give me a boost of motivation