This is a Tenchi Muyo Franchise Fan fiction only.

Other characters may show up from different anime series.

As they left their day of work at the dorms, they were immediately surrounded by many young women, some were quite flirty, and some were too forward, they had a million questions for them, except most revolved around one person, Empress Lashara Earth.

They pleaded and begged to know everything they knew about the Empress, and asked them what their relationship with the Empress was, Tenchi for some reason became rather tense, and without much explanation, he let out a sound that sounded like the one a frightened cabbit would make. He took off and Zero had no choice but to follow Kenshi as he began to run away from the girls that were chasing them. Zero kept following Kenshi but honestly felt he had better things to do than spend time playing tag in the middle of the forest.

As they kept running he began to notice that some of the girls started to fall unconscious simply running out of stamina, "Honestly a light jog and they are falling like flies, are these girls really supposed to be sacred mecha master candidates? Cause if they are, their training is pathetic."

After he placed ten of them in a safe place where others could find them, he felt this entire thing was just a colossal waste of time and effort. "Alright they want to play hide and go seek, fine Kenshi can take care of them, but I got a prize to win, so I will go and take care of my work, instead of wasting time. Time that is better spent finishing jobs like we should be doing."

Zero decided that instead of wasting time doing this stuff, he would continue to do his work and from time to time bring some of the girls that collapsed where others would find them.

Lithia was reading a book till she saw Kenshi running away and being chased by some girls, "What is going on?" One girl who was the one for who Kenshi got her handkerchief looked at Lithia, "I don't know, it seems these girls want to know about his relationship with the Empress and are chasing him to ask him questions, but as of right now nobody had been able to keep up, they are falling down like flies." Lithia saw where they were headed and could hardly believe her bad luck.

"I knew that he was a wild animal, we need to send a search party into the forest to find these girls, tell the elf guards and the princess we might need their help." The girl began to look at Lithia shaking her head and saying that it was impossible she was currently in the middle of class.

Two hours later many of the still unconscious girls were found, "Ah good that you made it Aura, I need you to call on the guards to send search parties to find the missing girls that went after Kenshi in the forest. They for some strange reason were chasing after him, and he ran deep into the forest, you and the elves know this forest better than we do."

Aura looked mortified as she saw the state the girls were in, she immediately said that she would call on her people and immediately start to do medical aid search and rescue operations, until they both saw Kenshi carrying two girls, "Ah Lithia, these are the last two of the girls, now if you will excuse me I need to find that jerk of a cousin of mine, honestly he left this entire thing on me, just he could win that damn bet. Wait till I find that heartless idiot." Kenshi took off running after he placed the last two girls on mats.

"So Kenshi was part of the search and rescue efforts huh." Lithia was still getting over the shock that the one the girls were trying to catch, instead was the one that found so many instead, and he was still full of energy after all this, she quite complained about how that boy had so much energy?

Finally, Kenshi found Zero still working on the path that leads to the outskirts of the forest, "Damn it Zero, the world day is over, no matter how much you do now, it will not count as work, so why the hell leave me to deal with that mess on my own?" Zero said he wanted to play tag with the girls or hide and go seek, who was he to interrupt their little playtime.

The very next day both Kenshi and Zero were asked to meet with Lashara and Mexiah for some strange reason, " Sorry boys but many of the female mecha master candidates, and mecha masters have made requests of the academy that you two be trained as Estheticians. Mexiah has agreed to educate you on the needed skills you need for this work, since according to her, you both lack experience with the opposite sex."

Zero mentioned to Empress Lashara that he does have experience with women, and he knows what he needs to do, except, unlike other people, he does not enjoy bragging about it. "Do you know how much Kenshi and Yukine have done to each other so far? No right, well there you go. Our mothers taught us about modesty and keeping such things private." He mentioned an old saying that states that gentlemen have no memory of such intimate moments at least not to share with others.

"I knew it, admit it, you have been banging those three all this time!" Zero glared at Kenshi and stated that he did not remember. that he did not recall. Kenshi said that Zero can fucking deny that but the more he denied it the more it means that he actually fucking hit a home run with those three.

Mexiah was happy to hear this, "Then you two should have no problem following my instructions, baby boys, and since you are more experienced than I thought, I will take you both to the edge of ecstasy and into lands of unparalleled delight." Kenshi asked why the hell was she calling them baby boys at all, there is nothing of them that could be considered an infant. She laughed as she said that some teachers like to call their students babies, it was sort of a nickname she glared at Kenshi and Zero, "Are you saying that I am not good enough to teach you both?" Zero flat-out said they were not dumb enough to even consider answering that question.

They began their training, and to Kenshi's horror, it was more than even he thought was appropriate, Zero on the other hand to him this was just a refresher class, so this was not as problematic as it should be, in fact, Zero might have taken it a little further than Mexiah was actually thinking, until Kenshi told him through their mental link to knock it off, or he might do the same to some of the girls that should join his harem. Zero mentally pouted and said that it was not fair but he accepted in the end. Basically, keep it all within the first and the start of the second base, and nothing more, or pay the price for it later.

"I feel better and more alive than ever after they got done treating me, but honestly they require more practice, so to get them to perfect their skills they need more test subjects or targets, Chiaia would be the perfect first target, Kenshi, Zero I order you to massage Chiaia." Both young men stood with a dull expression and their hands began to move and twitch. They looked and behaved like machines that had been programmed and given an order. Lashara quickly said this was no better than going into Bezerker mode. Mexiah laughed and said that in that state they would obey any and every order that she gave to them.

That is when something snapped inside Kenshi's mind, "Actually no, you can not order us to do something that can cause us, or any person we care about harm, the other thing is you can not order us in any way to interfere with the reason why we sent here in the first place. A protection was set in place to prevent Tartarus or any ally of his, from using mind control to eliminate us as a threat to their goals." Lashara pouted and said that the whole act of behaving like robots was just a nasty prank. Both Zero and Kenshi admitted they thought it was a cute and funny acting routine, so if it brought at least one chance to laugh, that was good enough. Kenshi told Chiaia he would only take things as far as she allowed and no more than that, just tell him to stop and he would stop, Zero promised not to lay a single finger on her.

Chiaia asked Zero what he meant by that, he told her if he dared to do anything even slightly intimate with any girl that Kenshi had shown interest in courting for his harem, Kenshi would do the Seina Yamato maneuver, which means he takes every woman for himself and leaves Zero with no one to woe. Chiaia said there was no way that Kenshi would ever be so selfish, which caused Zero to begin to laugh, "Oh yes, Kenshi has this completely innocent look doesn't he? Well if I break this rule, I have no doubt at all he would do that, in fact, I can guarantee that he would. So take it from me, I will never lay a finger on you or any woman Kenshi has decided to woe, ever, even if you beg me to. I will run away, hide, but I will not follow that request ever."

Mexiah of course asked one thing who was the person the maneuver was named after, "Senia Yamada, is by himself a whirlwind of chaos and destruction, he is canonically given the title of Mister Disaster, this single person had endured every single non-lethal injury a person could endure, and then some. The record of his injuries is so vast, it has over five volumes since they started to take photos of each injury."

Zero took a deep breath, "But as fate would have it he met four women, four ladies that somehow when they are near him, flip his horrendous bad luck and make it absolute foturnate. This guy went from not being able to walk to the front door of his house, without having part of the house fall on him, to winning an intergalactic lottery that made him one of the most successful and richest men to ever live. Those four ladies were not above-using everything to get him, including flat-out sex, and thus without a doubt attracted even more ladies that wished to use that good fortune for their own planet's well-being, as of last we met him, he had twelve actual wives and another dozen who wants to be married to him."

This sort of explain what he meant to her, in order words, if he tried to take one of the women Kenshi was interested in, gloves come off, and Kenshi will try to take every single woman for himself and the rest of the men are shit out of luck, as he screams in a sheer show of using his luck, that they can fuck off or turn gay, cause the women as his and he ain't sharing. "Chiaia you may be pretty, and you are, but I ain't dumb enough to even consider giving you as much as a back rub. However the same applies to him, and if he touches one of the women I am interested in, you better believe I am making a monk out of him, cause he will not see anything close to a woman's panties if he does."

Lashara asked how could they do that? Luck was a finite resource, there is only so much to go around, wars have been fought over this, Zero laughed and told her they knew how to turn misfortune into fortune, how else would they be able to find so many of these mushrooms, that people are willing to pay a fortune for, at such a rate and at such high numbers? Mind control, illusions, deceptions, and even curses simply do not work, they will achieve their mission regardless of how anyone tries to impede them.

"Tartarus will die, nothing in this world can save him, we will see that thing dead and gone, even if we have to put our lives on the line, the lives of our mothers are at stake, we will not let them die because on an asshole that wants to think itself the god of creation." Kenshi was quite stern when he said that, his voice cold and determined, making some of them wonder what they wouldn't do to achieve their goals?

Kenshi without further ado, took Chiaia away to a most private place and she was almost afraid of what Kenshi would actually do to her, he promised he would not do more than what she wanted, if she wanted him to stop, all she needed to do was say so. Zero was pretty much fucking bored, Chiaia was the only girl present that they could practice on, and Zero would not want to touch her. The only two other options were Lashara and Mexiah, again two women he could not touch at all. There was only one way he could describe his situation, it sucks. For some reason, Mexiah was now worried about her sister, and after the door opened and certain moans could be heard, she rushed in to try and help her sister, but instead of being happy for the supposed rescue, Chiaia punched her square on the face and took off proclaiming she would never forgive her sister, and that she actually hated her at this moment so much.

"Like Zero said, he refuses to touch any woman Kenshi is interested in, meaning those that apparently he made a proposal to, by giving them one of those extremely rare and valuable mushrooms. So if we want these two to actually master the skills they learned we are going to need new test subjects." Zero also said they could be technically called guinea pigs, earning him a slap from Mexiah for daring to compare any woman to a pig, but she did understand the reference.

They had to go all over the place to find people who were both Zero and Kenshi who would be interested or shown an interest in it, Kenshi's was not that hard, the guy was if anything not that secret about his interests in some of the female students, Lashara was shocked but realized Kenshi was quite open with his affections and being quite forward with his interests, so much so she compared him to a shameless flirtatious horn dog. The first surprise was that several of the women who had joined the service of Lashara actually volunteered to help Zero practice and perfect his massage technique.

From that moment on Mexiah and Lashara decided to explain to the director and the girls what was really going on, they were all taken to the director's office for a detailed explanation. "Director sorry to tell you, but we believe that Babalu and his son are going to attempt to invade his facility, and take over every castle, they will eventually try to do this using the blueprints invented by one of the people under my command, she calls it a Mecha Worker. A mobile armor that can work outside of the draft zone. If this information is stolen after the armor is perfected, nothing will be able to stop them. Thus this plan is to cause them to steal the blueprints at this stage and cause them to expose themselves sooner rather than later."

Lashara did not like the fact that the inventions of her people had spent so much time and effort would be used for such treasonous things. "So the fact that you are having Kenchi and Zero learn massage techniques helps this how?" The director was not going to be so easy to convince it seems. Lashara told her that this would allow them to form connections and potential alliances with the families of those they massage, thus hopefully preventing them from joining the traitors.

"They will pretend to be simply enranged, hungry for revenge against perceived humiliation and embarrassment, using one of the mecha workers, to get their supposed revenge against Kenshi and Zero, sadly the academy will be damaged due to the way they will use weapons to pretend to pursue them, we will keep most damage towards the forest, but we shall pay for and do all repairs of any damage we cause to the academy. But I would suggest that other students go to the dorms when the Mecha Worker is deployed." The Director asked why is the damage necessary.

Wahanlyn told her that the damage would make the traitors appreciate the Mecha Worker and thus motivate them to steal the designs, if stolen at their present level of development, they could be dealt with, "I built the mecha worker on my own, nobody knows how my creation whom I see as if it was my own child like I do. This armor does not need Aho energy, even has an Aho reactor. The reactor it uses can last longer than most mechanoid, but they do have key weak points, some of which are designed as a safety measure and some merely with the materials used to construct them, make no mistake director, I know that this is necessary, but I find no joy in the idea these bastards using my creations, my babies."

The director saw that her love for her creations was similar to a mother's love for her children, "I know but if the attack on the Empress, and potential assassination threat are anything to go by, the danger these maniacs pose is not to be ignored. Very well I shall allow this attempt to continue, but I only ask that you show restraint, the last thing I want is to tell someone's parent their child was injured."

Wahanlyn told her that she would but they had to sell the idea of how useful her creations were, so she might have to go a little overboard. Kenshi went and gave each of the women a delightful massage but he never took it past a massage, even if some of them were quite angry and vocal about it. "What the fuck, you get us all hot and ready to go and don't fucking finish the job, where is my happy ending massage, you lazy bastard!"

Kenshi wanted to know exactly what did they know about what Zero was doing to the girls he was touching, Chiaia had no reason to sugar-coated, she flat out told him exactly what she heard from the women, and he blew their freaking minds with an orgasm that made them want even more. "You give us a very good enjoyable massage but it leaves us all expecting and wanting more, something to get us to experience what they did, but you never do, something Zero has done with at least three women I talked with, so yeah he finished the job of sleeping with them, you leave us hanging without a chance to finish or get off."

Kenshi looked at them and could see they were all furious about this, "But there is nothing I can freaking do about it, Zero did to women who actually jumped at the chance to join his harem, they accepted his proposal, something none of you even have bothered to truly consider, if I am not going to marry you, I am not going to freaking have sex with you, it would be immoral if I even consider it." Wahanlyn simply walked between him and Chiaia and said that his reason was very clearly stated, his reason was well articulated, and that was morally correct, but that didn't change the fact she was still very much fucking pissed he never finished and left her halfway.

Kenshi decided to walk away wondering how Ulyte was doing, thinking of asking how the tea was making them feel, and telling him about the progress of the body, but he almost never got the chance as he began to ask he heard a person running towards them and without warning, this person jumped on him and nestled into his arms almost like she wanted to be carried, "Kenshi let's go, run away, I don't care where as long as I am with you."

Mexiah of all people was saying this out loud, and in front of some of the female students who began to gossip, saying that they did not believe what they heard claiming that she and Kenshi were going to elope. Wahantly was pissed as she decided to chase after Kenshi, maybe she would find Zero and make them both pay for the humiliation she and the others suffered.

She immediately took out something from what seemed to be a dimensional pocket and the minute Kenshi saw it he took off running for dear life, as the freaking thing looked like a giant laser blaster.

He nearly was hit by the blast of the firearm and caused a massive hole in the way missing Zero but not the cup of coffee he had been drinking, which was their clue they needed to start running for dear life. "So to answer your questions yes Zero, Wahanly actually figured out how to make a fucking dimensional pocket, and why are we running, because she and the other women who I couldn't fuck their brains out, want to beat my skull in and Wahanly just built the mother fucking BFG, alright?"

As they both ran away Zero was shocked to see the Mecha Worker, it seemed that it was an awful lot bigger than what he expected, the thing looked like a metal crab with massive legs and two pincers that looked like what he could be wrong but looked like Gatling guns for some reason. The minute he heard the sound of their fire, they were not like them, they were them, how the hell did she even know how to build this fucking things, he kept running faster and faster trying to avoid getting pumped full of holes. "Why the fuck is she firing on me? I never did anything to those girls at all. I somehow blame you Kenshi what the fuck did you do them to piss them off this badly?"

Wahanlyn was getting more and more pissed that her new rifles were still too slow to hit them at all, she decided that if this continues she might have to use the other built-in weapons. She would have her revenge for the humiliation she and the other girls endured. Kenshi was evading the bullets by jumping out of the way before the bullet even reached him. "Fine you want to know why they are pissed, it is because I only did a massage, but somehow those girls heard that you did not only do a massage with some of the girls you are interested but you fuck their brains out, and these girls are pissed that I never actually did that, so in truth Zero, this is all your fucking fault for taking things too far with your girls damn it, had you just done a simple massage these girls would not be as pissed as they are."

Zero began to try to run towards the forest jumping and shocked to see Dagmyre and that girl who was still obsessed with him suddenly Wahanly pushed a button as he screamed, "You ain't evading my revenge, you stinking bastards." A cover on the shoulders came off and that is when they saw a multiply head missile launch system. Even Dagmyre who hated them found the fact that Wahanly started to shoot missiles in the direction of Kenchi and Zero was far too excessive, saying that something like what was uncalled for. As they saw the rate of fire and the explosions they were causing in both the gardens and the forest he began to think about something else.

"You know that thing is supposed to work without an aho reactor, which means it can operate outside the draft, this thing could prove to be very useful for us in the future or when we plan to take over the castle, we should steal the blueprints of that thing and make better use for it." His attendant simply smiled and said she would do her best to break into Wahanlyn's research lab and secure those blueprints for his glorious plan. As they continued to continuously fire missiles in their direction, Zero noticed the level of destruction they were causing and was not happy about it. This was far more excessive than they had planned and Wahanly was not keeping her promise to the director to keep the damage to a minimum.

He told Kenshi if Wahanly continued like this, all the mushrooms he was using to bribe those girls, would be destroyed or burned to ashes, and the only source left would be the ones they were each growing in their labs. "But seriously Kenshi, they have a seal that prevents unplanned pregnancies, so if the girl really wants to, and you really like her, why the hell not take her for a ride and just go for it?" Kenshi continued to evade missiles while screaming at Zero to stop sounding so lude.

Kenshi screamed about how the fuck did Wahanly figure out how to make a dimensional pocket? Zero bonked him on the head, "You left the door to your fucking lab for everyone to see, of course, she is going to study it. You know how she is, there is no way in hell she would not try to figure the damn thing out."

Finally, the principal had enough of all this damage and horsing around, so she demanded that they stop or Lashara would have to pay a large amount in compensation. They were all pulled into the office, and the girls apologized for going overboard, the principal was past pity, "None of you will be part of the academy till further notice, you will not attend any classes or be able to use any of the facilities."

Mexiah asked if they were expelled, to which she said no, they would be in charge of repairing all the damage they have done, they were suspended till the academy was before this fiasco. "The academy already had their hands full with maintenance and upkeep of the academy, we don't have the manpower for all the stuff you destroyed or broke. So you will be suspended till you fix everything you caused, no exceptions, not even you Mexiah."

Lashara asked if she could just pay to have the repairs done, to which the principal asked if she paid someone else to cause these damages? No, then she got to roll up her sleeves and fix the mess she made!

Zero looked at the girls, "You know Kenshi, these girls are mostly nobles or high-class girls, they never worked a fucking day in their lives, well except for a couple, don't you think it would be faster if we did the repairs and let them take care of the easy stuff?" Kenshi had to admit that they probably knew next to nothing about construction or fixing things, so that might work, except the principal heard their conversation.

"You two make some good points, they know nothing about that, it is about time they learn, you two will be in charge, you will lead and teach the girls what they need to know how to fix things, and make no mistake, take it easy on them or do it yourself and I will be angry, you don't want to see me without my jolly disposition now do you boys?" Both Zero and Kenshi saw the look in her eyes and swore they were being stared at by Granny Saito, and vigorously began to shake their head making her see they understood.

The repairs were harder than they should but it took them the entire day to finally repair the buildings, and it took them till the weekend to plant all the trees and plants that were burned to ashes. or that's what Zero and Kenshi were hoping but the girls are taking way longer than they should in their opinion. Lashara thought this scheme would make her money, but she lost most that she would ever gain had the plan worked she slumped as she saw this on her ledger.