Lisa's Substitute II aka Black Eyed, Please. Lisa gets a nasty substitute called Ms Cantwell and Ned punches Homer and feels guilty.
Plot
The title gag is King Kong Homer climbing a tall tower. The three-eyed crow flies about. It squawks as King Kong Homer grabs the crow and eats it.
The billboard gag is Cleatus advertising his restaurant Roadkill Dinner. It's fender picking good!
The chalkboard gag is that the school now has an electronic touch screen whiteboard. Bart types "I am sorry for breaking the blackboard." He copies and pastes his lines to get out of detention quickly.
The couch gag is a cartoon illustrated by Bill Plympton. The Simpsons are all 1920s gangsters in the Noir era.
They pull guns on each other! "Coooool..." Oscar cooed with excitement.
...
The school morning. The kids are dropped off at school from the school bus driven by Otto.
Kids are chatting as the bus arrives.
Oscar discussed the politics of walruses farting.
"Now this is a tale of turtles and teacups, of cabbages and kings... With a side of potatoes..."
Bart face palmed having to listen to his jabbering.
"How comes you always get the window seat..." Milhouse whined.
"Because I do..." Bart sighed as Oscar leaned over the seats to poke him.
"As I was saying... of thirty dogs and dirty frogs..."
Bart grabbed Oscar in a head lock and throttled him.
Lisa shook her head.
"Everybody out." Otto lets everyone off.
The kids get off the bus. Lis winces as she sees Martin and Hugo dragging Bart off of the bus, he doesn't want to go in today. Well that's not unusual... Lisa thought.
"I don't feel so good..." Wendell the constantly ill, pale kid groaned.
"MALKAFOFET!" Oscar screeched in indignation.
Milhouse frowned at him.
Otto changes the sign above the cabin windows from School Bus to Casino Escort. He drives for a bit and then stops at the retirement home.
"Everybody in." He invites the elderly people onto the bus.
The elderly people slowly get on the bus. Some moments later they annoy him while he is driving.
"Bathroom break!" said Crazy Old Jewish guy.
"I spilt my pills!" said Jasper.
"My back hurts..."
"Music has no meaning today!" Grampa groaned.
"I'm cold..."
"Everybody out!" Otto stopped the bus and yelled annoyed.
The elderly people slowly got off the bus, some aided by walking sticks or zimmer frames.
Otto sighed.
...
Second grade class,
Lisa was baffled as Miss Hoover was absent. Yeah she was ill again.
Second grade are waiting for Miss Hoover as she's strangely late.
"No Miss Hoover eh?" Lisa shrugged.
"Nope." said Chuck.
There is soon anarchy as a result except for Lisa who is reading. Ralph is eating the paste again...
Black Weasel was beating up other kids.
"Where's Miss Hoover? It's not like her to be late." asked Chuck, the kickball obsessed kid.
"She's been absent before... like when she had lime disease." said Oscar typing up what was happening.
"It's Lyme disease Oscar... and our class doesn't have a purple cartoon hippo attending..." said Lisa.
"Hullo!" said the purple cartoon hippo.
Oscar chuckled.
"Maybe she got swallowed up by that black hole?" said Janey.
Lisa sighed in a deadpan manner.
"Or she fell down a well, like Bart..." Janey giggled.
"Janey that wasn't funny years ago when you cracked that joke... It's still not funny!" Lisa ranted.
"Okay! Chill..."
"I heard she got dumped again..." said a kid.
"Give over..." said Black Weasel.
"Maybe she flew to the moon..." said Ralph.
Everyone gawked at him, baffled.
Guys, need I remind you of Ralph's instability and lack of rational thought?" Lisa sighed.
"Lisa's such a nerd..." Janey hissed.
"I saw a bird..." said Ralph.
Lisa sighed and returned to reading her Nancy Drew book.
Black Weasel took to tormenting Chuck. He was giving him a noogie.
...
Fourth Grade class. Bart is showing the class another gross home movie.
"Here's Dad walking about in his underwear..." said Bart.
The kids scream.
"That is just totally weird..." Nelson cringed.
"Oh look Hugo! You're clipping your toenails!" said Bart. Hugo was on film clipping his nails.
"Aaaaaaagh!" The kids scream.
Hugo blushed wondering how Bart got him on film.
"Mrs Krabappel! He's traumatising the children!" said Martin.
"Quite so, Bart shut that material off and sit down!" said Mrs Krabappel.
"Wait, let's watch Snowball, our cat give birth again!" said Bart.
Everyone screamed.
Eventually Mrs Krabappel or Mrs Flanders managed to get Bart to turn off his gross home videos and sit down.
"Okay, who's next with a show and tell?" Mrs K asked.
Lewis's hand shot up. Mrs K sighed. "Come on up Lewis.
Lewis chuckled in an absentminded manner as he headed to the front of the class, went the wrong way then turned round and found the front of the room.
Bart winced seeing his buffoon of a friend make a fool of himself.
"It's about my potato-powered pants!" said Lewis in a goofy fit of guffaws.
Bart face palmed. His twin, Hugo gawked at Lewis baffled.
"Right..." said Edna.
Lewis discussed his potato-powered pants...
Then... "MELON?! NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Lewis yelled at his imaginary friend, Melon.
Bart wept embarrassed. He laid upon his folded arms.
"Uh Lewis can we keep on topic..." said Mrs K.
"Probably. Who wants to see my gun again?" Lewis pulled out his gun.
"No just stick to talking about your potato pants..." Mrs K stuttered.
"Fine..." said Lewis.
...
The Kwik E Mart. Marge is buying groceries while looking after Maggie and Eric.
"Okay the last thing on my list I need is black eyed beans." said Marge.
Oscar arrived in a puff of smoke. "How about Black Eyed Peas?" He snaps his fingers, The Black Eyed Peas appear.
They sing Where is the Love, or Lady Humps.
Marge face palmed.
Oscar laughed.
Eric frowned and sucked his blue shiny pacifier.
Oscar was dancing to Lady Humps.
"Uh Oscar..." Marge sighed.
Teddy gawked.
"This is worse than Lisa's Madonna Fixation." said Teddy.
"Ted please... I am still having nightmares about that cone bra..." Oscar shivered.
Brimstone chewing Harry from Wiz Kids was baffled by the American breakfast cereals.
"Cap'n Crunch?!" Harry gawked.
"Don't you have to be back at Pervert drive?" Oscar chuckled.
Harry seethed.
"Or is it Private Drive..." Oscar chuckled.
Harry snarled.
"Don't you have to be in class..." Marge said vexed with him. She fixed a hawkish look upon him.
Oscar sighed, he teleported back to school.
The school halls. "Well back to a failing grade school where the walls are insulated with asbestos.." Oscar sighed.
"Hey do not knock the asbestos!" said Bart wondering the halls. "More asbestos! More asbestos! More asbestos!" He chanted.
"Enough!" Oscar yelled.
"Someone's a grouch today..." Bart smirked.
"And someone is gagging for a knuckle sandwich! Now enough about the asbestos!" Oscar yelled.
Bart flinched.
...
Second Grade classroom, Skinner finally explains to the class why Miss Hoover is absent.
The class are drawing cards for American soldiers fighting over seas.
"Children, you can stop writing letters of support to our troops; that was just busywork." said Principal Skinner.
The kids put their materials and letters away.
"Now, I want to explain Miss Hoover's absence."
The class chatters among themselves.
"She is suffering from severe... depression." said Skinner.
The kids gawked baffled.
"It's when someone fills so miserable that they don't want to get out of bed in the morning." said Sinner.
"Ie like my sister Bigmouth..." said Oscar.
"Um yes Oscar..." said Skinner.
Bigmouth frowned at Oscar.
Quiff came in to take Oscar back to class. Oscar sighed as his friend dragged him back to class.
"The school needs a Tiki bar..." Quiff sighed.
"A Tiki bar?! Quiff! You're not even old enough to drink alcohol!" Oscar gasped.
"True... but I can just drink Mountain Dew from the coconut halves..." said Quiff.
Oscsr gawked. "You wore that blinding orange Hawaiian shirt yesterday..."
"No, you're eyes need testing... I was wearing a blue Hawaiian shirt with pineapples on it yesterday..." said Quiffy.
Oscar frowned.
"Can I serenade you with my ukulele?" Quiffy asked holding a ukulele.
"No! Now lose the grass skirt!" Oscar yelled. Quiffy was wearing a grass skirt.
Quiffy sighed removing the grass skirt. His underwear was visibke.
"Quiff put on your pants..." Ace groaned.
"Actually he's alright like that. Because the eggplant god said so..." said Oscar.
Quiffy gawked at him.
...
The casino, Some of the elderly retired folks are on fruit machines. Some are playing bingo.
"And that is why kids today should be locked in cages." said Abraham Simpson, known to some as Grampa.
Jasper grumbled while playing a fruit machine.
Crazy Old Jewish Guy spun the slots. He got two bells. He gasped. But then the third icon was a plum. "Oh purple fruit thing... where were you last week..."
A retirement home nurse grimaced. "Do folks here not no what a plum is?" He asked a collegue.
"Either that or it's a curse word to them..." said the other nurse.
"B-3," said a casino worker running the bingo game.
"B-3? How about AK-47?!" Yelled Otto's grandmother. She pulled out an AK-47 and shot up the place.
The old folks cower under the tables.
"Jumping Jehoshaphat!" Abe gasped hiding under a table.
Outside Otto is tearing the bark from a tree with his teeth because he took some LSD.
Graggle was concerned. "That's just weird..."
Otto then head butted the ground like Ed from Ed, Edd and Eddy does.
Graggle winced.
"Stop laughing at me flying avocado!" Otto yelled tripping out.
"I'm going home..." Graggle sighed.
Inside. Grampa and Jasper are playing bingo.
"Two threes, 33." said the staff running the game.
"Calling out none of my numbers... that's a paddlin'" said Jasper.
The staff running the game sighed.
"He's serious about the paddling..." said an old guy with a wheezy voice.
Yeah a weird Fan fiction writer wrote a weird fan fiction about him paddling Lisa...
The elderly folk then played battle ship.
"B-3"
"You sunk my battleship..." Jasper chuckled.
The elderly ladies giggled.
"Jasper that joke stopped being funny twenty times ago..." the casino staff sighed.
Plot 2
Second grade class.
Ralph put up his hand.
"Yes Ralph..." Skinner sighed.
"How do you treat Depension?" said Ralph.
"Not to worry, she has been treated with heavy doses of... Lorazepam and other drugs from the... Benzodiazepine family." said Skinner. Hevwrites these very long words on the board.
Everyone scratched their heads baffled.
"Now, until Miss Hoover returns, this class will be getting a permanent substitute." said Skinner.
Oscar started singing No Substitute from South Park.
Skinner face palmed.
"A substitute?" Lisa asked.
"It's not Mr Bergstrom..." said Skinner.
Lisa sighed. "Well are they at least gonna teach the correct materials and not corporate sponsorship..."
"Lisa, without corporate sponsorship, we wouldn't be able to teach you the three R's: reading, refreshment and Raspberry Buzz Lite. Get your razz on!" said Skinner.
Everyone winced.
"Sir whatever that was, that was not funny..." Lisa sighed.
Skinner sighed.
...
Meanwhile Duel Academy has the same problem of kids not learning the appropriate topics.
"Professor are we actually gonna learn maths, literacy and science or are we just gonna study a trading card game until we graduate..." Syrus whined.
"We're studying a trading card game! How has this academy not been shut down by accreditation?! We're teaching a card game?!" Dr Crowler ranted.
Syrus sighed. "How am I gonna get to college with an A in Duel Monsters..."
The same reason everyone in Pokemon wants to be a Pokemon master... The economy is kept afloat by a hobby...
"Aww, get your game on Sy..." said Jaden.
"I've wasted my high school years joining this circus! They're teaching us how to play a card game!" Syrus cried.
...
Second grade.
"Now don't be alarmed children, this is a schwa..." Skinner drew a schwa...
A car pulls up.
"Ah this must be your substitute teacher." said Skinner.
Lisa gawks out the window at the car and the teacher who owns it.
Confident, Vassar sticker on the windshield. (gasps) Could it be? Do I detect enthusiasm? Lisa says to herself in internal monologue.
"She's brought her own orrery! And it's got no Pluto!" said Lisa gasping.
"What?! That's terrible!" Oscar yelled.
Lisa gave him a deadpan glance. "Oz... scientists have re-categorised Pluto as a dwarf planet... It is no longer a planet..."
"PLUTO IS A PLANET!" Oscar screeched with indignation.
Lisa face palmed.
The lady teacher arrived. "Is this Miss Hoover's class?"
"Yes this is the correct class." said Skinner.
"I am Ms Cantwell." said Ms Cantwell.
Oscar snickered but disguised it under a sneeze.
Lisa frowned at him.
"I also hate blonde girls..." said Cantwell glaring at Lisa.
Lisa gawked baffled.
"And overachievers..." Ms Cantwell added.
"Ugh..." Lisa sighed.
Oscar then farted and uh followed through. "Ugh... I need to go to the nurse's office..."
Skinner face palmed.
Skinner's office. Oscar sat perched on the chair facing Skinner.
"You know why you are again..." Skinner sighed.
"I soiled myself again... yes..." Oscar sighed fidgeting uncomfortable.
"Our staff can't deal with this, we are not a remedial kindergarten. Mrs Simpson will take you home and deal with your soiled underwear herself..." said Skinner.
"Sir, it's a diaper..." said Oscar.
Skinner sighed.
"Now I must meet with the new art teacher, Mr. Testacleese."
Oscar cracked up laughing.
Skinner scowled at him.
"No fair... you know that name is funny!" Oscar chuckled.
...
Second grade class.
"Well I better get to know you Rugrats..." said Ms Cantwell.
"Lisa Simpson. Hi. As second grade student-faculty liaison, I'd like to welcome you..." said Lisa getting up.
"Get back in your seat." Ms Cantwell snapped. "If I have any apples that need polishing, I'll let you know."
Lisa frowned as she sat down. Janey snickered.
"I understand there are homework assignments." said Cantwell.
Ralph handed in his scribbled assignment.
"Mm. Well done, Ralpa." said Mrs Cantwell.
Lisa gave a slack-jawed look with her jaw hitting her desk.
"If I can't remember the right letter, I just put an "A."" said Ralph.
"Well, here's another one." Cantwell gave him an A...
Lisa face palmed.
"Well, while you're grading so generously, here's mine." said Lisa handing in her homework.
""B." As in, "because I say so."" said Ms Cantwell bein g a jerk.
Lisa groaned.
"Also that third grader who soiled himself is right. Pluto is a planet still. Your Stephen Fry revisionist science is not real science..." said Ms Cantwell.
Lisa fainted.
Lunch Lady Doris revived her with a meatball.
"Day old meatballs, works every time..." said Doris.
"Meat?!" Lisa gasped. She fainted.
At home. Lisa's wrapped in a furry blanket.
Bart is poking her. Lisa wakes up.
"I thought you might be cold, honey, so I put this chinchilla coat on you." said Marge.
"Fur?!" Lisa gasped. She fainted again.
"I'm just kidding, it's not really chinchilla fur..." Marge giggled.
"Yes it is..." said Bart grinning.
Marge sighed.
"I got sent home for pooping my diaper..." Oscar chuckled.
"Yes we know Oz..." Bart face palmed.
Lisa wakes up in bed.
"What happened?" Homer asked.
"A new, nasty substitute is bullying her..." said Oscar.
"Oooooh... like Mrs Kelp..." Bart chuckled.
"Please do not mention Mrs Kelp..." Lisa shivered.
"Well Otto's grandma shot up the casino today." said Grampa.
The Simpsons gawked unnerved and horrified.
"She's always doing that..." Hugo sighed.
"Well now for the B story." said Homer.
"Did you say bee-" said Oscar.
"No he didn't!" Bart yelled.
...
Homer one morning needs sugar for his coffee. There is none.
"Sugar.. in water..." A giant cockroach demanded.
Homer winced.
Marge sighed checking the sugar pot.
"I'll ask Ned." said Homer.
He goes next door and rings the bell.
"Wait! I killed Ned a few episodes ago!" Homer yelled.
"Not canon! I reset everything!" Matt yelled.
"Hi diddly ho! Hi diddly ho! Hi diddly ho!" said Monkey Ned's three heads.
"Also he is no longer a three headed monkey man..." said Matt.
Fine..." Ned is normal again.
"Hey, Flanders. Can I borrow some sugar?" Homer asked.
"Sure." Ned scoops with a spoon some sugar from the bag and adds it to Homer's coffee.
"Uh, a little cream? Goes with the sugar." Homer asked.
Ned sighed annoyed.
"Fine... I'll ask my old boss Hank..." Homer sighed.
Scorpio Enterprise. Homer arrives at the security booth.
"Oh Hi Homer!" said the guard letting him in immediately.
Hank Scorpio was laughing maniacally while lowering James Bont into a pool of sharks...
"Hey Homer!" said Hank.
"Hey Hank. Got any sugar?" Homer asked.
"Sure!" Hank rummages in his trouser pockets, called pants in the States... He has handfuls off sugar. He pours sugar in Homer's coffee. Homer is freaked out.
"Want any cream?" Hank asked.
"Uh... no..." said Homer.
Back at Ned's. "Ugh fine... I'll get you some cream..."
"I just didn't wanna find out where Hank keeps his non-dairy creamer!" Homer yelled.
Homer soon has cream in his morning coffee. He sips it.
"Now if you could make with some bacon and eggs, I'll be on my way." said Homer.
Ned seethed.
"Why don't you come on in and have breakfast with us?" He tried to calm himself.
"Are your kids gonna be there?" Homer asked.
"Eh, for a little bit." said Ned.
Homer sighed. "Fine..."
...
The Simpsons house, kitchen.
"Has anyone seen the cat?" Marge asked.
"I am looking fora cat! Means worlds to me..." said the giant alien cockroach.
Oscar snickered.
Marge sighed.
Back to Ned's.
Ned's beatnik parents are there.
"Homer, you know my parents, Capri and Nedward." said Ned.
"I could have sworn Ned's Mom called herself Agnes once, then Mona..." said Oscar.
Yeah well now she has a name...
"Hey, hey, Homer J." said Nedward, Ned's Dad.
"Urge to kill freaky beatniks rising..." said Season 5 Homer snarling.
Homer frowned at the clone. "I happen to like living as a hippy now..."
"Homer, Hippy and beatnik are two different things..." said Nedward.
Homer was baffled.
"Well for one, beatniks dress like French mimes..." said Oscar.
"Okay..." said Homer.
"And we only like to be a little Non-conforming. You flower jerks keep smashing everything up and starting fires because you think laws are for squares..." said Nedward frowning.
Homer hurls a chair through the window. "Woohoo! Down with the establishment! Up with anarchy!"
Ned face palmed.
Later over breakfast.
"Hey Homer J! How many beers have you killed today?" Nedward asked chuckling.
Homer laughed.
"Please stop with the rhymie whymies..." Oscar whined.
"Shut up you stupid Limey!" Homer roared.
Oscar glared at him.
"Anyhoo Pops, I haven't drank yet. My Marge is a tad concerned about my alcohol intake, but at least I'm not a self-destructive soccer player or rock star..." said Homer.
George Best had beer for breakfast...
"Dad, don't encourage him!" Ned seethed.
"Son, you are the Mayor of Dullsville." said Nedward.
Homer laughed.
"Now, you know we don't discuss politics at the table."
"It's funny though... Especially watching an angry person try to eat and yell at the same time..." said Oscar.
Plot 3
Simpsons house.
"Come on kids hurry, the bus is here..." said Marge.
Lisa sighed feeling glum. She looked at the floor as she walked and dragged her school bag.
"I thought the dweeb loved school..." Bart winced at her.
Lisa frowned at him.
"She's being picked on by Ms Cant-Smell..." said Oscar.
Bart chuckled. "Can't smell..."
Hugo rolled his eyes.
"Hmmmm... That maybe so Oz, but she is still a teacher..." Marge sighed. "Show a little respect..."
"I don't respect bullies..." Oscar seethed.
Lisa smiled a weak smile at him.
Ned's dining room.
"And then I smoked a reef a rino!" Nedward discussed drugs.
"Dad stop talking about your cannabis habit!" Ned seethed.
"Hello, police? I'd like to report a buzz-killl in progress." said Homer into a banana.
Ned took the banana. "There's no emergency here. And please charge us for the false report."
Homer and Nedward laughed.
"Mr Flanders the imagination police do not charge people for false reports..." said Oscar.
Ned sighed. "I'm going for a power walk..."
"Take Snap, but not Crackle and Pop with you!" said Oscar.
Homer winced.
"The band is called Snap!" said Oscar. "That includes the exclamation point..."
Homer and Nedward joked around.
Ned knocked on the window. He frowned holding a sign that said: Jesus is watching." On the other side is a picture of Jesus looking at something through binoculars.
At the crucifixion of Jesus. Jesus wearing a loincloth and attached to the cross was looking at something through binoculars.
That something was the window of Mary Magdalene's house. She was getting undressed.
"Yes that's it you sinful whore..." Jesus mumbled in a perverse manner.
A thief on a nearby cross winced baffled.
...
At the Simpsons house.
Teddy the shiny nosed teddy bear creature was sniffing Oscar's crotch with his big wet shiny nose.
"Enough!" Cousin Hank seethed.
"Hello, police? I'd like to report a buzz-killl in progress." Oscar pretended to be holding an invisible cell phone.
"Hello police? I'd like to report a disgusting pervert who keeps writing about diapers and a cartoon teddy bear thing sniffing kids!" Hank yelled.
Oscar drew his thumb across his throat in a threatening gesture.
Hank glared at him.
Marge sighed.
"I'm going to Texas..." Hank hissed, fed up.
"The state or the band?" Oscar asked.
Hank screamed in rage and stormed off.
Marge frowned at Oscar.
"What? He's the one in the wrong..." said Oscar.
Ned's house.
"Whoa, this room just got a whole lot cooler." said Nedward.
Homer chuckled. "Got any weed?"
Ms Cantwell's class.
"Okay, children, ten minutes of free play." said Ms Cantwell.
Kids chatter loudly.
"I'm a fun factory!" said Ralph. He ate some purple play doh and then grunted, it poured out of his ears.
Chuck winced at him.
Lisa was reading Angelica Button.
"Lisa, free play." said Ms Cantwell.
"I'm a nerd, Reading is free time for me..." said Lisa reasing.
"Ugh, bull-pie. You're trying to get ahead of the other children." said Ms Cantwell.
"I LIKE PIE!" Teddy cheered.
Oscar cupped his hand over Teddy's mouth and frowned.
...
Lisa hummed while reading.
"That's it, you're losing joeys." Cantwell seethed taking green Joeys from her kangaroo.
Lisa gasped. "Please keep them together. If not for me, for the mother."
A pistol's hammer clicked as if someone was about to fire a gun. "Put the Joeys back..." Oscar snarled.
"Oz... being a gun toting maniac is not helping..." said Lisa.
"Lewis disagrees..." said Oscar. Lewis from Bart's class was pointing a gun at Ms Cantwell.
Ms Cantwell sighed and put the Joeys back.
Lisa whimpered.
Is it possible I've met a teacher who doesn't like me? Lisa thought internally.
Oscar picked up her thoughts via his telepathy. He grinned.
"Mrs Kelp! Mrs Kelp! Mrs Kelp!" He chanted.
"Oz cut that out.." Lisa seethed.
Ms Cantwell was struggling to put the Joeys back.
"The joeys go in feet first." Lisa sighed.
Oscar chuckled.
Ms Cantwell frowned and took one of his Joeys.
Oscar gasoed. "Chauncey!"
Lisa winced.
"Oh come on... you named your Joeys..." said Oscar.
Lisa sighed.
Ned is finishing his power walk.
"Six miles, and I'm all smiles." said Ned.
"Stop rhyming!" Oscar yelled.
Ned sighed.
He goes into his house.
"Funyuns? Little Debbies?" There's snacks all over the floor...
Sitar music plays.
"That's Cross legged music!" said Ned.
Homer and Ned's parents are watching Sesame Street. Big Bird is on screen.
"Uh..." Oscar winced.
"Look at the size of that bird. I'd go Henry VIII on those drumsticks." Homer laughed.
"You said it Homef J!" said Nedward high fiving him.
King Henry VIII Homer frowned. "Must ye doth mock thy luncheon?!"
"Homer, I can't believe you're partaking with my parents." Ned seethed.
"Yeah, it's medicinal. We had a pain in our neck." Homer laughed.
Ned's folks laugh.
Ned sees red. He thumps Homer. Thwack!
"Ow! You're left handed?" Homer faints.
...
The General hospital.
"Homer, you'll need to wear this eye patch for a couple weeks." said Dr Hibbert. "And, uh, you may never see a film in 3-D again."
Homer screamed and wept. "Noooooooooo!"
Oscar laughed.
Bart frowned at him.
"Wait why am I crying?! 3D films are crap!" said Homer.
"But the storytelling is finally catching up to the technology." said Dr Hibbert.
Homer scoffed and maid a horse noise.
Ned felt bad about what he did.
"Ned Flanders. I can't believe you struck my husband." said Marge.
Someone tapped her on the shoulder. "John Wick?!" She gasped. Fine it was John Wick...
"Marge Your son Bart struck my dog..." said John Wick.
Hugo winced.
"Bart why did you do that?! Now John Wick is gonna kill us all!" Marge yelled.
Bart face palmed. "Seriously Oz.., A John Wick reference...
"And quit shoe-horning yourself into the episode!" Hank seethed.
John Wick then killed everyone, with a pencil...
Oh wait reverse time, we can't do the episode with everyone dead...
Bart frowned at Oscar.
"Marge, I've been racked with guilt and pain." said Ned.
"That reminds me... I have to torture Hank on a rack..." said Oscar.
"Fuck you! Perv!" Hank yelled.
Marge frowned at Hank.
"My mustache fell out; this is a clip-on." Ned takes off his moustache.
Oscar laughed.
Marge sighed.
"Don't feel cross with yourself Mr Flanders. We've all wanted to clobber that fat jerk..." said Oscar.
Homer frowned holding an ice pack over his bad eye.
"Mainly because you're a jerk to poor Hugo!" Oscar yelled at Homer.
"Oscar we live in a civilised society..." Marge sighed.
"Do I look civilised to you..." Oscar frowned. He looks like a caveman in a gross up close up.
"Uh... no..." said Marge.
...
Ned sat by Homer feeling very sorry about the whole situation.
"Sorry, Homer. Now, do you mind if I pray at your bedside?" Ned asked Homer.
"No Praying!" That jerk nurse in Homer's triple bypass yelled.
Oscar whipped out from his shorts a black handgun and shot her dead.
"Oscar!" Lisa yelled.
"She asked for it..." Oscar hissed.
"No, I don't...' Homer smiled to Ned.
Ned begins to pray.
"If you pray to Superman." said Homer.
Oscar cracked up laughing.
Bart face palmed.
Homer smirked.
"Not praying to a fictional comic book character." said Ned.
"Oh how hypocritical..." Homer sighed.
Ned sighed.
"I shall pray to Superman for you Homer!" said Comic Book Guy.
Bart face palmed.
"What about Christian Archie comics?" Homer asked.
"Neither canonical nor comical." said Ned.
"Stop writing fanon about my comics! I forbid you!" The artist behind Archie Comics yelled.
"Let me ship Moose and Jughead in a Yaoi fan fiction!" Oscar yelled.
Bart seethed.
"Oz enough of the running commentary..." Hugo frowned.
"Here, I'll get you started. Hail Superman, wearing tights, Clark Kent be thy name, one nation, under Zod..." Homer prayed to Superman.
"Not praying to Superman..." Ned sighed.
"Kneel! KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!" Oscar yelled.
Hugo stuffed a chloroformed cloth over his mouth. Oscar fell into a deep sleep.
"Finally..." Bart sighed.
"Grouch..." Homer sighed.
"I resent that remark! Just because I am called Oscar!" Oscar regained conscience.
"Aw crap..." Bart groaned.
"Ned, Homie's a little cranky right now." said Marge.
"Like me when I have a diaper rash..." said Oscar.
Hank seethed.
"More than his eye, I think you hurt his feelings." said Marge.
"More than meets the eye..." Oscar sang part of the Transformers theme.
"Shut up!" Bart yelled.
Plot 4
