THIRTY-NINE
It has been nearly a month since Isabella reinstated herself as Admiral of her fleet. Captain Thorne was given a brand new vessel as well as a willing crew to sail with her. I expected the return of my own ship, but Isabella surprised me yet again.
Apparently, my ship was in the Caribbean and had been for years. Isabella had led me on a wild goose chase around the world to retrieve what was in my own waters this whole time.
The anger that boiled in my blood at that revelation was enough to send me into a fit of rage.
I did not speak to Isabella for the first week of sailing on her ship back to the Caribbean.
We did pick up Jasper and Alice, both of whom were well and seemed relieved to be on their way back home. I wanted to be happy for my friend, but in my heart I was still stung by his secrecy.
I knew no matter what happened next, my days of sailing with Jasper by my side had come to an end.
All this has left me in a foul mood on our voyage home, and it has gotten to the point where it is so bad, hardly anyone will speak to me. I am assigned to watch alone, and it's just as well, because I have nothing more to say to any of them.
I am on my solo night watch when Isabella corners me.
"Darling, would this mood of yours find any relief from the pleasures of sex?" she asks, settling beside me on the deck.
I snort. "No," I lie. Truthfully, part of my foul mood has to do with the fact that I have not once been with Isabella since that god forsaken island. I loathe how much I miss her body.
Isabella titters beside me, making me scowl at her.
"I have something for you," she says, producing a small parcel from her pocket. I look at the velvet-wrapped item in her hand a long moment before I sigh and finally reach for it. The velvet falls away, revealing my father's pocket watch.
I swallow back a lump in my throat.
"Thank you," I say, my voice low.
"It was your father's, wasn't it?" Isabella asks. I glance at her and nod. She turns her face toward the dark sea. "My father wasn't so sentimental," she says softly. "Have I told you about him?"
I am surprised by the turn of conversation and shake my head when she glances at me. She nods and licks her lips, looking back at the ocean. "He was an Admiral in the King's naval force," she says, shocking the hell out of me.
"Truly?" I ask.
"Admiral Charles Swan," she says. "He was a decorated officer, beloved by both the king and the governors of the colonies." She shakes her head. "He was far worse a pirate than ever I was."
I frown. "He was a pirate?"
Isabella turns toward me. "In the sense that he committed atrocities for the sake of his king. My father destroyed lives, ripped families apart, tore down entire communities to raid them for their valuables in the name of the crown." She shook her head. "Imperially-sanctioned piracy, can you imagine such a thing?"
No, I couldn't.
Isabella lets out a breath. "I took my father's title, and I committed my life to doing the exact opposite of what he wanted." She grins. "Father would be horrified to know I have mutilated his legacy the way I have."
I am speechless. I don't know what to say to any of this.
Isabella smiles at me. "You're the kind of man I always wished my father could be," she admits.
I let out a scoff, turning from her. "I have no honor," I say, miserably.
Her hand lands on my thigh, and I feel warmth spread through me at the contact. "You have more honor, Edward, than anyone I've ever known."
I glance at her skeptically, and her fingers squeeze me gently. "I didn't know men could be noble and chivalrous until I met you," she says tenderly. "I don't think I even knew what the word integrity meant until you showed me." She smiles, her thumb tracing circles against my thigh. "You might have lost your way for a while—it is an unfortunate side effect of knowing me, I'm afraid—but don't for one second think that your character has been compromised. You are a beacon, Edward. The only light shining in these dark waters."
I try to wrap my mind around what she's saying, because it feels like for every word she utters, there are three words she has not yet spoken aloud. I clear my throat and shake my head.
"I hope you are right," I whisper. "I fear that I might be too far gone to find my way back to who I was."
Isabella squeezes my leg again. "You will," she says assuredly. "I know you will."
…
Our voyage back to the Caribbean is markedly uneventful. Apart from the night Isabella returned my watch to me, there is not a moment of intimacy between us the rest of the journey, and though I miss the hellfire of her touch, I am in truth relieved she is giving me space. I am too far gone, and I do not want to submerge completely into debauchery and debasement.
Not if I ever plan to win my honor back.
The morning our ship docks in the Caribbean is mild and clear. According to Isabella, we need to stop and refresh her ship's supplies and then our next stop will be my vessel.
Despite everything, I'm not sure I believe her.
We are striding down the dock coming off the ship when our entire day gets turned upside down.
Soldiers come racing in our direction, and before we can even draw our swords, they have their weapons pointed at Isabella.
"Halt!" one of them shouts. "You're under arrest."
Isabella gives one of her signature smirks. "Little me? Whatever for?"
A few soldiers step forth to slap irons onto her wrists and she looks genuinely surprised. There are so many soldiers around that there is no hope of fighting our way out.
They take Mr. McCarty into custody, as well as the other handful of sailors that are with us. When they go to cuff Jasper, I speak up.
"Not him," I call out. "He's not with them."
The soldier looks at me and nods, and that's when Isabella whirls on me.
"Darling?" she asks, sounding surprised.
I let out a breath, feeling guilt lick at the walls of my stomach. Before our voyage set sail, I sent Jasper to the governor with a letter, telling him I would deliver Isabella and her crew to him in exchange for a brand new ship. It had been, at the time, what I thought to be my only option.
Had I known the piratess like I know her now…
"Captain Cullen?"
I look up to see an officer making his way toward me. "Yes, I am Edward Cullen," I say, offering my hand.
"Cullen?" Isabella says. "Darling, aren't you just full of surprises."
I can't help but glance at her, feeling guilty. At the time, lying about my name felt normal, right even. Now, it feels like one more sin to add to my long list of misdeeds.
"We received your letter," the officer says. "The governor would like to thank you for your aid in capturing this dangerous band of pirates, and he invites you to dine with him tonight."
I let out a breath and nod. All I really want is to be back at sea.
I hear Mr. McCarty let out an angry sound to hear of my betrayal, but I ignore him. "I would be honored to accept," I tell him. "So long as my first mate and his wife may join?" I ask, motioning to Jasper and Alice. When we picked them up again on our way back, Isabella offered to marry the two of them as the Captain of her ship. I'm not sure the marriage holds any weight in the eyes of the crown, but in the eyes of God, it is as binding as anything else.
The officer nods. "Of course. We'll send someone to collect you from the inn." He motions for his soldiers to move, and I foolishly look over, catching Isabella's eye.
The look of surprise in her eyes slides deep into me, piercing me through and through.
What have I done?
