It was only a short trip over to their class, Kwan noting the vitally brief distance from their lockers to the seat of the door to their homeroom, and it was when they saw the face of that they all knew they'd come to the right place. Dale was the first to spot the be-speckled man, his short, stout figure flashing in and out of view as he minded the needs of the various other students in his midst. Kwan smiled, cutting quickly through the crowd to overtake the man from his side, and as he'd hoped, and perhaps expected, he was greeted warmly, as were the rest of his friends.
"Ah, Kwan! I was hoping I would be having you for my Homeroom, along with the rest of you! You all were always a treat to have. I take it you'll be having me for a class this year? It was...ah, Calculus AB, was it? The AP course?" The man pondered openly, clearly pleased with the prospect, and from the way that Kwan heard him ask, he could almost suspected that the older man knew the answer already.
No, the teen figured without much consideration, it was certain that he did.
Kwan could thank his parents in that regard.
It was almost second nature for most teachers to assume the best from him. It was practically ingrained in the very nature of his name, and more than that, from the things he did...courtesy of his parents. Hell, he'd spent the better part of the summer doing AP study camps, SAT training, career and college tours, and just about everything a prospective student would need to do to get in the good graces of just about every teacher in Casper High. And if the beaming, almost prideful look in Falluca's eye was anything to go off of, he'd have to say that he made the mark and then some.
"You know me too well. Yeah, I'm supposed to be doubling up with Statistics, I think. Yearling teaches that course, right?" He answered calmly, glancing down at the schedule in his hands to catch her name, but his teacher was quick to answer, and even quicker to beam with exuberance at the notion.
"Ambitious! Yes, Yearling took the course this year, and you'll find that there's no better fit for the subject...save for me, of course." He hummed pridefully, adjusting his glasses with a quick, fitting hand before continuing.
"But honestly, you will be in good hands with Yearling. She and I are very familiar with each other, and I must admit that she is very good at what she does." Smiling, Falluca patted Kwan on the arm, and struck as knowing look to Dale, Paulina, and Star as other student passed around them.
"You all take notes from this one; he's got enough ambition to share with the rest of us. I look forward to having you, . Oh, and you all can pick your seats; I expect you will choose ones that will not pose a disturbance to the rest of the class." Falluca stated finally, nodding to each of them before motioning to greet another student right after him, and with a shallow nod, Kwan moved past the older man, Dale and the others keeping close on his tail as their conversation picked up thereafter.
"Wow, barely an hour into the year and you're already the teacher's favorite. Typical." Dale chimed teasingly, nudging Kwan lightly though his tone was mostly playful. Kwan rolled his eyes, entering the room and minding the collecting droves of students here and there as each of them decided where they would sit. Immediately, his eyes fell on a few seats, exactly five within reaching distance of each other that remained untouched despite the growing student body within the room. Gesturing to them, the others seemed to catch on quickly, making longer, quicker strides to the seats around students and articles alike. Many of the students hardly noted their presence, talking quietly, if excitedly, amongst themselves, and he didn't have to guess why.
It hadn't exactly been a secret that pretty much everyone was rearing for the year to start, even with everything that had, well...happened. But a summer of uncertainty, a summer of hesitation, and everything in-between was enough for just about every student (or rather, the ones that remained, Kwan thought darkly) to want to try again, to try to have things go back to normal.
That wasn't too much to ask, was it?
However, taking their seats, it didn't take much to notice it...the various empty seats that had been filled just a few months ago with familiar faces that, though Kwan couldn't say that he was close with, or even acquainted to, it was still strange to see them completely vacant...and he wasn't the only one, either. Other students had largely done the same, and though most the students around him made it their business to remain jovial and upbeat, it was hard to miss the scanning glances that many of the were taking around the room, dotting each and every face with earnest attention that Kwan could guess was for just one cause: to see who was left. It didn't fade on Dale, Paulina, and Star's faces, either; it was hard to find a student that wasn't immediately aware of the odd silences that befell the class as the reality set in, sometimes at different times, others in little alcoves as their eyes fell amongst each other before conversation tentatively began again, if quieted, hushed tones.
It was hard to ignore what was essentially the elephant in the room...and it was a rather perverse, obstructive elephant at that.
Regardless, Kwan didn't want the first day to be a reminder of what happened, and with a brightened, warm look, he removed his backpack and placed it in the seat beside him to his left whilst Dale seated himself on his right, and Star and Pauline took the seats immediately behind and in-front of Kwan as well. It didn't take long for them to get settled, and when Dale noticed Kwan set his beg to his left, he looked to him quizzically.
"What're you doing that for? Holding the seat for someone?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Kwan nodded, quick to grin as his teal eyes wandered over to the door, making note of the different faces, though none of them was the one that he was looking for.
"Uh, you're forgetting Dash?" He answered, giving him an expectant look though, stranger still, he was met with odd, half-amused expressions.
"Oh, right. Say...do you know what homeroom he has this year? Do you even know if he has Falluca?" Star hummed, following his line of sight as she leaned on her arm, twirling her hair on-hand and through her fingers. Thinking on it, the clear answer was no; he didn't know, necessarily, if Dash was in homeroom with them, and it was made even harder by the fact that getting in contact with Dash after hours or really at any distance is pretty much impossible, so having him tell them was off the table. Conversations had already been struck before as to why the youth didn't have a phone, or even a computer, to keep in touch with them with, and each time, without fail, he always seemed to avoid the question, or even more, give them a different answer every time.
"Oh, my parents don't like phones and stuff like that - " He'd respond when he asked when he would get a phone.
"Um...oh! Did you see the game last night! Darren Brody was great on the layups - " He would say when Kwan would ask why he always had to leave so soon.
"A phone...uh...oh! Did you wanna hang out? I don't have to be home yet? I don't need a computer if I'm already with you, right - " He would answer whenever they brought up him asking for a computer or really any means of communication.
Every time it was something new.
Every time, it was a different response.
Yet in all of the years that they posited the questions, nothing ever came it, and more than that, Kwan thought with a sense of resignation, he wasn't sure they would ever really get a straight answer regarding it. But he never wanted to feel as though he was being pushy or overly involved with the issue (thank his parents for his, should he say...less confrontational tendencies), so he wouldn't really bring it up unless it were a big deal...which it wasn't, the teen reasoned as he turned to answer Star.
"I mean...no, but it can't hurt to just wait. Besides, he had homeroom with us last year, why wouldn't he this year, right?" Kwan assured them, though it was mostly for himself. Despite this, the other three didn't seem entirely by the notion either way, or, it seemed like that, seeing as they didn't even stand to speak on the issue anymore before transitioning to their own conversations. But he didn't think too hard on it, and he couldn't really blame them, either; Dash was a bit of a hard cookie to crack, and getting him to hang out with them, much less communicate with them regularly was a bit of an ask. It wasn't surprising to him that they would be, well, a bit more relaxed and nonchalant on the issue...but he was still his friend. What would he look like if he didn't at least try to include him?
So turning away from them, he faced towards the door again, waiting to see if the next person to come through would be Dash.
- (Same time, Elsewhere...) -
Dash grinned as he forced his way past more students, though admittedly there were many he had to shove as most tried desperately to get out of his path as he sauntered the rest of the way to his suspected homeroom. He knew the way enough as, if he remembered correctly, Lancer was his homeroom teacher and his english class wasn't too far from his math one, as far as he could tell. Glancing at the printed sheets between his calloused fingertips, Dash noted the room number in stride, running idea after idea in his head over how he'd like to make his grand entrance.
Should he wave at them first? Maybe from the doorway? Or...maybe from the front desk, at the front of the room? That way that would see him before he spoke and he could make sure that he was in the right mindset to pull of the greeting? Dash considered what he would say, turning over casual one-liners and boisterous shouts over and and over until his head began to swim. First impressions, as he'd come to learn, were everything, and if there was one thing he wanted everyone to know, it was that he was in control.
He was the top dog.
Everyone had to know that he was here, that he was back, that he was great, that he was WORTH LOOKING AT -
'Get it together...think! Okay...hey, guys!...No...no, that's too casual...they were gone all summer, come on, you can do better than that!' He shouted to himself in his head, though his eyes darted around him suddenly, noticing the long, drawn glance of a smaller student before they noticed that he'd looked back at them. His crisp, dark blue eyes squinted coldly, pulling his lips into a snarl as he all but stooped down, meeting the boy eye-to-eye as he grunted at him a crude response.
"Just what the fuck are ya lookin' at, huh? Got somethin' you wanna say, dork?" Dash spat coldly, narrowing his eyes as he stepped forward to the student, pushing him slightly as a few other students rushed to get out of his line of sight.
Dash could see it, the smile on his lips, the way that the little fuck was trying to make fun of him. He could probably hear what he was thinking, couldn't he? Why else would he be looking at him like that? What else could it be -
'Knows, he knows? They all know.'
'Laughing...laughing at you...'
'Make him stop...he won't stop...they won't stop - '
The voices weren't helping, egging on the sickening fear that began to collect in his gut beside his fear, the one emotion he wished he wasn't feeling just then. He shouldn't be afraid, he should be getting to class, he wasn't scared, he wasn't -
"N-nothing! I just, I was looking for my friend and I - " The student yelped as Dash shoved him again, this time into a locker as his lips turned into a glaring grin.
Excuses, all fucking excuses, and lies, and tall tales -
Dash knew when people were looking at him -
THEY WERE ALWAYS LOOKING AT HIM. HE COULDN'T REST, HE CAN'T LOOK AWAY -
"Yeah, bullshit, dickwad. You think you can get away with lyin' to me, huh? Do ya? Think I'm some...some fuckin' idiot, huh? HUH?!" Dash nearly shouted, balling the younger teen's shirt in his hands as he pulled him close to him, Dash's skin burning hot with a sudden anger and fogged clarity as the idea rolled itself in his head.
'They think you're a joke. A fraud - '
'Don't let your guard down, don't look away - '
No, they were right. No, he had to make an example now, he had make sure he knew, that they all knew that he wasn't someone to be played with. Smiling, he felt strangely excited by the prospect, a strange, over-abundant energy filling him as he pushed the kid into the locker before standing at his full height, wide, unblinking eyes watching his seemingly still face contort and warp with fear that made him feel...strong.
He felt...strong.
"Do that shit again, and I'll make sure you never forget it, you get me?" Dash threatened, only briefly minding the million eyes, the watching eyes of the various faces and students that had been frozen in animation throughout the duration of his interaction with the other student who'd, by then, had resorted to fully and wholeheartedly nodding along compliantly, a reflection in his eyes as his internal fears remained unquenched, but felt there was nowhere else to go with them. He'd agreed to his terms, he'd...conceded, so that meant that he won, right? Dash couldn't focus on his own thoughts, though, the perverse whispers of the student body around him, and his eyes ran through their faces, making note of their stillness, their blankness, their strangeness.
His energy didn't wane though.
He still felt...electrified.
He wanted to keep the momentum.
"Y-yes! Sorry, Dash! Won't...w-won't happen again!" The boy answered before scurrying away, calling Dash's attention back for a second, though it was a moment too late, but he didn't care about that.
First impressions counted.
'They're watching...they're all watching...' A voice whispered, making his skin crawl.
He wanted them to stop.
'Watching you...judging you...' Another chimed, slithering in the back of his skull.
'Stop looking at me, stop looking at me, STOP LOOKING AT ME - '
"What are you lookin' at, huh?! Get outta the way!" Dash yelled at the students immediately beside him, his skin itching to be free of their eyes, and without another word, the youth wasted no time parting the crowd once more, rushing the process of navigating the halls, though in the back of his mind, the teen couldn't help but feel that the way forward felt disproportionately long, a terrible distance as he tried to force those fears away. He was fine, he didn't have to think about any of it, he didn't need to think at all.
Everything would be better when he got to class, he would be okay, or, the teen thought, he was already fine.
He just needed to sit down, he just needed to figure out what he would say, he just needed to -
"Ah, . Goodmorning!" Dash nearly jumped out of his skin, casting his eyes down to meet the spectacled eyes of nearly two heads below him as he'd nearly ran headlong into the teacher, realizing quickly that it's cause was his negligence, made worse by his rushing heart that thrummed and pattered wildly in his chest. In one fluid motion, the teen tried to regain his composure, though he couldn't help the confused drawl of his voice when he reached up to rub the back of his head with mock bashfulness, if only to hide the crippling fear that bubbled under his skin, a sensation that he was quick to try and restrain.
"Oh! Falluca! Good to see ya. Sorry, didn't, uh, see ya there. Sort of was...nevermind." Dash started to explain, but he knew it wouldn't work out for him, that he would be better off keeping it simple, keeping it light, easy to answer, easy to ignore...didn't need to make things complicated and hard on the first day, after all. Dash had enough wherewithal and practice to know that saying too much, and worse yet, not saying enough, left too much room for investigation, more than he could help. He'd learned early enough that it was better to keep things from escalating in the first place, and to do that?
Don't raise questions.
At his admittance, Falluca shook his head, grinning knowingly.
"Well, you ought to pay more attention to your surroundings. Would hate for you to stumble into trouble because of your, how should I say...inattentiveness." He started and ended in a kindly tone, though Dash's mind didn't grasp the nature of the joke. Did that mean he wasn't being...he wasn't sure what that meant; the teen didn't do well with larger words, he knew -
'Because you're stupid. So fucking stupid you don't even know what that means.'
'You don't know anything.'
'Nothing.'
'NOTHING - '
"S-sorry, Falluca, I...I wasn't tryin' to, you know...I - " Dash uttered quietly, minding his shame as he stepped back a bit, the rubbing of the back of his head and neck growing uncomfortable as the rubbing turned to light scratching, the bed of his nails scraping into his scalp with ground teeth and a strained chuckle.
He shouldn't be messing this up, he was supposed to doing better, he was supposed be...making a good impression. Dash's irritation and stress only grew as he felt students brush past him to get into the classroom, and it was then that he realized that he was still in the doorway, making it difficult for his peers to get into the room, the few that were left over beside himself. They wavered impatiently behind him in the hall, muttering amongst themselves as they eyed him.
Eyed him as they muttered about how much they hated him.
Muttered about how much they despise him.
They hate him. Everyone hates him. Everyone, EVERYONE -
'N-no...I'm just overreacting. I'm thinking too hard, but this...why does everything feel so weird? Why do I feel...wired up? I don't know what's happening, I just...I need to focus...I can't keep messing this up. What's wrong with me?' The teen felt his fingers lace with his hair, stringing the gelled strands between worn fingertips that gripped and pulled firmly at the root. He needed something to just...pull. To keep him right here, to ground him...anything to make the fluttering, nervous feelings go away. Or maybe...he just needed to be with his friends, to distract himself for all of this thinking, thinking, thinking. He didn't want to think anymore today, he was tired of it.
He just wanted to relax, he wanted to feel good, he wanted...he wanted...
...he didn't know.
But what did he know?
'Nothing. You don't know ANYTHING.' A deeper voice spat, chiding him, chuckling as it faded into the back of his mind.
Yeah.
That was right.
Nothing.
Dash couldn't quite read the expression on Falluca's face, but he wasn't sure he liked the tired look that fell over the older man's features as he looked around the teen and noted the several equally disgruntled faces that echoed his discretion back at him. With what Dash felt was a forced smile, his teacher gestured to the classroom and the few seats leftover that he could see, and with a sudden glimmer of interest, Dash could see Kwan waving over at him from the further side of the classroom, the only one out of their group that seemed to even notice that he was there as they were speaking amongst themselves, but he didn't even register that in his mind.
There it was.
There was his safety.
He couldn't mess up anything, he couldn't fuck things up, if he was with them.
Smiling slightly, though unconscious the expression might have been as if felt strangely genuine, he almost missed that Falluca was still talking to him, and his head snapped back over the man, feeling wildly embarrassed that he'd apparently missed what had been said.
"...choose seats. So if you would - " Falluca was cut short by Dash's own nervous chuckle, the teen barely managing to catch the tail end of the man's words when he faced him once more.
"Oh, um...my bad! I didn't get that, could you, uh...say that again? I don't know what I was...I mean..." Dash started, but unsure of how to finish what he was going to say, he felt himself grow quiet, retracting a bit when he noticed the still forced, tired smile on Falluca's lips grow strained even more in a bid to maintain his patience. The teens own discomfort wasn't helped by a taller figure that slipped almost imperceptibly past Dash, pressing against his back, followed by two shorter figures that kept to the form's side in tow. His body froze at the contact, his own self-control slipping as he twisted around to meet the body with his eyes, and when he fell upon a head of dark, ebon hair, his heart skipped fruitlessly in his chest. He could see Danny point to a few desks, and behind him, from as far as Dash could tell, the two that had come in along with him seemed to nod in agreement, but his dark eyes noted the girl, her earnest smile growing wider as she stepped over to a chair that Danny had pulled out for her.
And something in him burned.
It was way that she looked at him. The way she...smiled at him.
It made him...angry. Irritated. Warm with agitation that was only slightly diffused when Falluca spoke again, capturing his attention once more.
"I said that you all are free to choose your seats this year, though I hardly have to guess where you'll be seating yourself, ..." Falluca voiced tiredly, his wide, owl-like eyes traveling wordlessly to the further end of the classroom, falling upon Kwan and the others, and at the very least, Dash didn't have to wonder what he'd meant, and for all intents-and-purposes, the man was completely correct, not that it should have surprised him, or really anyone, what his choice would be. However, he only half-heartedly smiled in response, mind and thoughts still focused on the deafening roar of giggles that erupted from Sam's mouth as she spoke her words to Danny.
Words that should have been his own.
Giggles that should have been his own.
Words Danny weren't sharing with him.
WHY WASN'T HE PAYING ATTENTION TO HIM, ONLY HIM -
"Nice! Thanks, Falluca." He voiced with a strained voice, doing his best to temper the bleeding heat in his shoulders that seemed to rise without warning. He wasn't about to lose his cool right here, not right now, not with so many eyes and judging stares about, but that didn't mean he didn't feel every bit compelled to. But he resisted the urge, instead leaving the doorway and passing Falluca on the way in as he nodded to the man finally, but he didn't immediately go to his seat. Something in him was grossly attracted to the area where Danny had been seated, and before he even had the chance to convince his body to do otherwise, he was already on his way over to where he was. The teen didn't miss the confounded expression of Kwan on the opposite side of the room, the former following his line of sight over to where Danny was before his face turned with something that Dash couldn't read, and to be frank, he hadn't even considered what the expression could mean.
Something in him just wanted Danny to...acknowledge him.
He was irritated, but he didn't know why.
Was he angry at him?
Was he angry at her?
He couldn't tell.
He didn't care.
He just wanted to be seen.
Sauntering over to the desk, he disregarded the equally scared stares of the students whose desks he passed, each turning away and averting their gazes as he walked along before he felt it, icy, pale blue eyes landing on him once he'd made it to the side of his desk, and as it always did, upon Dash's face, a cruel, grin wandered upon his features.
"Well, if it isn't Fentoni, in the flesh! Had a good summer, dork?" He spat, feeling any of the edge of this morning, and the fear that he'd felt wash away, or rather...he forced it down, beneath a layer of cockiness that was easy to foster. He did well enough when it came to performing, and as far as he could tell, the teen thought as his eyes remained firmly on Danny's. this was just that.
A show of his power.
A show that he was in-charge of.
Because he was in control.
Only he was.
And more than that. Dash figured as he turned over the blank expression in his mind that Danny had been wearing the moment he'd appeared by his desk, leaning a scarred hand upon the cool surface as he shot a quick, embittered glance over to Sam who'd been seated beside Danny to his left, only he was worthy of Danny's attention.
Only him.
Not that stupid bitch next to him.
Danny sighed, the teen casting a slight look over at Sam and Tucker that Dash couldn't decipher before responding.
"Look, Dash, the year just started, so could you lay off today? I'm not in the mood for - " Before he could even finish, Dash was already chuckling, giving Danny a snide grin as he spoke.
"Mood for what? Bein' a loser? Huh?" He snickered, watching his face carefully to see how he would respond. Danny remained silent, though, choosing instead to fix his eyes on the front of the classroom, facing away from Dash before Tucker chimed in.
"Come on, leave him alone. Don't you have anything else better to do, man? Seriously?" Tucker started, his eyes burning in Dash with an exhausted annoyance the taller teen didn't miss, and for the most part, Dash could disregard that entirely, taking little note of the former's drawn, tight features apart from mild amusement. He was a none-factor, hardly worth considering as he leaned down to face Danny again, grin widening in kind.
"Come on, don't give me the cold shoulder; nothin' to say, Fentoad? I'm just tryin' to be a good peer, checking in on my favorite punchin' bag. That's not a crime, is it? You know it's been a while since I saw you last, did ya miss me?" He teased, pushing into Danny's shoulder a bit with a rough hand, and at the feeling of his sturdy shoulders beneath the damp fabric of the teen's clothes, Dash felt himself grow warm and light with euphoria. Just touching him, Dash wouldn't admit to himself the curvature of his shoulders, the tension of muscle that coiled beneath, and a primal urge surged in places he wouldn't acknowledge.
Because that wasn't what this was.
He...wasn't like that.
He didn't...he would never think that way about another guy.
Never.
And that was what he told himself when he walked from. around the desk and knelt down, fully leaned on his desk by now and wanting a response from him, yet even he'd shoved his shoulder, the former didn't budge an inch, his eyes trained and firm on the front of the classroom, looking thoroughly and completely past him with little of the acknowledgement that he'd been looking for.
And that angered him.
It was quick to rise in him, the rage that filled his very core at his callousness.
He wasn't sure why.
It shouldn't have...mattered to him as much as it did.
But it mattered.
It mattered to him a lot.
'Why isn't he reacting? Why isn't he SAYING ANYTHING?!' The teen uttered in his mind, scrambling to save face as the burning eyes of the other students looked on, and they were whispering...whispering about him, he knew they were. Danny was making him look like a fool.
Making him look like a joke.
He wasn't a joke.
He didn't get to get away with that, he didn't -
"We said leave him alone, Dash! God, can you take a hint?!" It was only when he heard her voice, Sam's voice, that his skin began to prickle, edged with a blinding irritation that rose to the surface like a cold rush of blood. His eyes darted over to her, the girl standing now and shaking with anger that only seemed to match his own in intensity, her furious, red cheeks blistered bright pink to paired with the wrath cleared in her violet eyes. Dash could have laughed, and funnily enough, he did, the teen gritting his teeth as he considered her for a moment before standing tall, his own height dwarfing her own. She didn't waver, even when he came flush to her, and it was stranger, still, when he felt Danny move beside him at his eyes, and it was out of his peripheral vision that he saw his eyes trained on him at last.
But through the pleasure from finally finding what would move him, Dash immediately felt bitter.
He'd only left his stoicism behind because it had something to do with her, with this piece of meat he'd, for some reason, felt so inclined to involve himself with. Dash himself couldn't see the appeal; from his own perspective, and through the filter of bitterness, she was delightfully average, even below that, if he were completely honest. His grin fell as he looked her up and down, glowering at the girl as he spoke, and he was clear and intentional with not biting his tongue.
"And just who the fuck was talking to you, bitch?" Dash growled dangerously, his fists clenching and unclenching as his compulsion to act grew.
Compulsion to make her shut up.
He just wanted her to shut the fuck up.
Where did she get off, talking to him like that? What was she to him?
Dash didn't even need to think hard about the answer.
She was nothing.
Just a stupid cunt that didn't know her place.
Dash knew what happened to people that didn't know their place.
He knew too well what happened when people didn't stay in their lane.
He could hear it, see it, in his own mind...the many times Dad had shown Mom the same thing, and to him the same.
"I said shut your fuckin' mouth, stupid bitch!" Dad's hand was swift, a collision course with her cheek a sworn promise as she was sent into the counter from the force of the blow, a searing, red mark the remnant of the force of the impact of his father's hand. From beyond his sealed eyes, firmly shut against the sight of it, he could hear the onslaught carry on for a period of time he couldn't quantify. This wasn't anything new, nothing he hadn't heard before as he listened to the slaps turning to impacted punches, stomping to kicking, and cries to screams.
That was Dad's way.
This was the only way.
Dash didn't know how else to voice his anger, to give it presence, apart from what he knew.
Violence.
Violence until the other person did what you wanted. He knew that all too well. He'd faced the same judgement before too many times to count.
But that was just what it was.
And from what he could tell, it worked.
When Dad was finished, Mom was left on the floor, a sobbing, broken, bleeding mess that was imprinted into the back of his eyes when he finally opened them again. Allen was there, an impossible presence, a suffocating shadow that seemed only to want to admire his handiwork in the surreal silence of the trailer following his discipline, saved only for the muted whines of the woman at his feet.
"I told you to stop fuckin' talkin, didn't I? Huh?! DIDN'T I? But you don't fuckin' listten! You fix your fuckin' lips to say that bullshit again, and I sweat to god, I'll do worse than this, understand?!" The man barked, leaning down and picking her up by her hair and Dash received a full image of her beaten, swollen face, her one, remaining eye that she could open, fixed on the floor of the trailer with fear and submission that left a scar in his mind.
Another scar to join the many that were already there.
Through the blood and sinew that dripped from her lips, she whispered, a choked response that, if you weren't listening for it, you wouldn't have heard it.
But to Dash, it was deafening.
"I'm s-sorry, honey...I won't...s-say it again. I'm...I-I'm s-sorry...I'm sorry..." She whimpered, shutting her last eye as she mumbled apologies over and over again, a sickening mantra that played like grated nails in the forefront of his mind. But it seemed to work, enough that his father grunted and let her go, and with a great draw of breath and a cleared throat, he loosed spit upon her hair, stalking away as she lied there, groaning with agony.
"Fuckin' cunt...think's she can talk to me like that..." Allen voiced aloud on his way to the fridge, grabbing a drink and walking to the main bedroom before flopping upon the bed with a loud creak that echoed emptily around the trailer. But he'd learned a lot.
Learned that that was how you taught people to respect you.
Learned that hurting people was the right, that it was justified.
And that was apparent in him, too.
He felt it, the sudden temptation to just...make her silent.
To smack that look of defiance and audacity off of her face.
To humble her.
That's what Dad would have done.
That's what Mom would have done.
But his words seemed to strike a nerve.
It was in one, fluid motion that Danny made it to his feet, and it was a reminder of his towering figure as he stepped from his seat and into the aisle to overtake Dash in sheer physicality alone. It must have been a shock to the other students as well, noting the sheer difference in height and presence between the two of them as the murmurs grew louder, more concentrated as Danny, in the same fashion that Dash had to Sam, looked down at him, piercing, electric eyes burning with a rage that almost overshadowed his own.
"What did you say to her?" Danny uttered darkly, stepping in-front of same to put space been her and Dash, and this only increased their closeness, the teen's own breath hitching in his throat as he was forced to look up to meet Danny's eyes, a visage, a memory, close in mind as he often had to do the same thing with Dad.
It made him feel sick, but he repressed the pulsing fear in his veins as he regained his composure.
"Oh, what? You heard what I said, Fentoni. Did I strike a nerve? I can't help it if your little cock sleeve don't know her place. No one asked the stupid bitch to dig her nose in shit that don't concern her, did they?" Dash responded snidely, giving Sam a biting look that didn't unnoticed by Danny. However, at his comment, Danny only seemed to grow in height, his bright eyes flickering with alight anger that dwarfed only his own.
"Dash...leave. I'm not asking you, I'm telling you, leave us alone. Right now." Came his deadpan command, uttered like a whispered order that, despite its quiet delivery, Dash could all but feel the coursing rage that bubbled beneath. But even that didn't deter him.
Dash was finally getting the attention he wanted, even if...it wasn't the most positive.
And he was never one to back down from a fight.
He was too prideful to do anything like that.
"Oh, so I did strike a nerve. Funny, you never fought this hard when I was fuckin' with you. What is it, them?" Dash started, finding his second wind.
He wasn't done yet.
He said when they were done.
"Is it..." Tapping his chin, Dash grinned, ignoring the darkening look on Danny's face.
"...because she's a low bar? Can't say her looks are it, since, you know..." Dash spoke casually, earning a disparaging look from Sam, one he smiled at. Danny's face only deepened with anger, but Dash went on, but something came to mind, a pensive look on his face.
He knew what it was.
"Oh, I know." Dash started, leaning in close to Danny, paying little mind to the discomforted glare that rose on pale features as he closed the distance, a wicked grin playing on his lips.
If there were one thing that he was good at...it was getting under people's skin.
After all...he knew just what to say, though, if he could be honest, the teen thought as a rise of scorned hate burned in his chest, it wasn't just for that. His expression darkened in kind, eying Sam carefully as the words left his lips, a soft hurt bundling deep in his chest.
"She must be a good fuck, then. Can't see why else you'd be this bent out of shape for a sorry piece of shit like that. Is that it?" He cursed, the teen himself ponderous at the thought.
That had to be it, right? That he just wanted something to stick his dick in? That's all people wanted, as far as he could tell, and frankly, the teen thought spitefully as he squinted at Sam's horrified expression, he honestly couldn't see what else there was to want.
He'd fucked enough girls to know that she was hardly worth losing sleep over, and less to get this angry over what he said.
What did she have that he didn't?
What could she possibly offer that he couldn't?
IF DANNY JUST WANTED A HOLE TO FUCK, HE COULD DO THAT JUST FINE, BECAUSE THAT'S ALL HE WAS GOOD FOR, RIGHT? THAT'S ALL HE WAS, AND HE COULD BE BETTER THAN HER. HE COULD -
Shaking his head, he blanched at his own thoughts.
What was he thinking?! He didn't, he wasn't -
'Yes you do. You know you just want him to fuck you. Don't you, faggot?'
'That's why you touch yourself. You think about him when you do, don't you?'
'That's right...faggot.'
'You want him deep inside you, you want it, you do.'
'Faggot, FAGGOT.'
'You know it's true.'
'Disgusting.'
'No, no, I...shut-up. SHUT-UP, SHUT-UP, SHUT - ' Dash didn't get to finish his thought before he felt it, a large, grasping hand gripping his shoulder as he was ripped from his inner musings to meet Danny's glimmering hate, displayed like righteous fury within his eyes. Dash's breath hitched in his throat in him, a blinding disgust and repulsion settling in his gut with vile presence that didn't ease even when the fear had left him. He stepped back, pressing up against the vacant seat just before Danny's desk as the halfa stepped forward, taking up Dash's vision like a wild, blackened shadow.
He didn't want to be touched.
He hated being touched.
He hated this.
But...Dash couldn't deny it. The swirling glee that pressed against the front of his pants as warmth collected in his loins.
Something in him wanted him to touch him.
'No - '
Dash wanted it so badly. To have just Danny's attention, his affections. Was that so wrong?
'Stop...stop thinking that - '
He wanted Danny to hold him.
'I don't - '
To take off his clothes.
'N-no, don't - '
For Danny to have him, for Danny to take him, to fuck him. That wasn't bad, right? Yeah, that' was it, wasn't it? HE WANTED TO FEEL DANNY INSIDE OF HIM, HE WANTED TO SCREAM HIS NAME, HE WANTED TO -
'STOP IT. STOP THINKING THAT. STOP, STOP, STOP - ' Dash felt sick.
Completely and utterly sick.
Something was wrong with him. What was...what was he doing? What was he thinking? WHAT WAS WRONG WITH HIM?!
But he wouldn't have time to really think on it, not for long.
Not when he could feel the pressure of Danny's hand on his shoulder grow, almost painfully, and the halfa leaned to meet his ear, and even then, as sickened as he was at the thought, he felt himself become erect as Danny's breath tickled his ear, a shame that wasn't allowed to be evident on his body as, even through all of this, he maintained his composure, the teen forcing a grin to his face with mock arrogance to distract himself from the choking sensation of his pants.
He couldn't think about it, he couldn't -
"I'm warning you...Step. Off. You do not talk to her like that. Do you fucking understand?" Danny warned simply, almost too calmly as it didn't match the abject fury that flashed against his features like thunder. But was still strange, Dash thought suddenly through the mess of emotions that twisted uncomfortably within him.
It was realization that this felt so unlike Danny from before, the meek freshman that allowed him to shove him in lockers and to harass him.
Feigning confidence, Dash couldn't even say he had the gaul to respond, not that he would have the time to as Falluca, only then taking notice of their little spat, stepped in, his voice traveling over to the two of them as his eyes burned into them with firm respite.
"What is going on you two? A bit early in the year to be have disagreements, isn't it?" The man voiced, watching them with patience, though Dash could clearly tell he wanted them to separate, not that he was against the idea. Despite his penchant for egging people on, he could take the hint and clearly see that Danny probably wouldn't do to be pushed any further...not unless he wanted to really test the waters.
And even he knew when to call it quits.
But that was only half the reason.
He'd since broken out into a cold sweat, and he could say that he was at least grateful to his makeup for hiding just the marks underneath. He could feel a furious, perverse blush spread across his neck and face as their close proximity was giving rise to a particular sensation he could name all too well.
Arousal.
As disgusted as he was at the idea, it didn't stop it from claiming him, and it wasn't helped by the brushing of fabric against his cock, a primal urge building up in him that he knew too well, and was far more willing to snuff out.
He needed to get away from him, he needed to just...get to his seat, to just...call it off, for now at least. Just until he got himself together. Besides, the teen reasoned as he turned around to meet Falluca's eyes, a nervous smile plastered to his face in kind, he needed to maintain his reputation.
At the very least, he could end off this whole thing on his terms.
"Oh, nothin' like that, Teach'! Just...having friendly conversation, ain't that right, Fenton?" Dash hummed kindly, chuckling all the same before Falluca conceded, giving the two a doubting look before speaking.
"Okay, well, save it for later, you two. We have new students joining us, and I want everyone seated, so, if you would..." He urged, and without resisting, Dash obliged, giving the man an agreeable look.
"Oh, sure thing, Falluca. We were just finishin' up anyway." Dash called back, and with a turn on his heel, Dash, in a rush to leave Danny's presence as his mask of self-control was surely slipping (not that he would let even a single soul know that), he shoved past him, his shoulder brushing against Danny's waistline, a testament to their very evident differences in height (and if he wasn't mistaken, he was sure he could feel abs underneath, but he didn't allow himself to think that for too long before he tried to force the thought from his mind). In that one movement, he made his way to his seat, making no move to look back as he could still feel Danny's eyes on him, trained in a deathly glance that didn't fade even a moment or so after he'd left is desk.
Dash couldn't afford to look back.
He'd lose his composure if he did.
He makes it over to where Kwan and the rest of his friends had been sitting, though he notes their matching silence, something he wasn't quite expecting for people he hadn't seen nearly three months. They all looked amongst themselves, even Kwan, Dash noted. as the youth took the seat that he assumed was for him, if Kwan's laid backpack was anything to go off of. In fact, much of their reactions matched that of the rest of the class's; judging looks paired with fetid whispers that remained mostly inaudible to the teen, though all of this only worked to confuse Dash.
Was something up?
Why were they so quiet?
"Uh, hey, guys? Hello, I'm here! What's goin' on?" Dash asked with little introduction, leaning up against his chair to mind Kwan, Dale, and the others as they cleared their throats, not immediately responding.
Dash didn't understand why things felt so tense all of a sudden.
Shouldn't they be happier to see him?
Despite this, Dash was pleased when Kwan broke the awkward air with a cough, taking up a grin that was enough to quell the worries that had collected in the back of Dash's mind. They were probably just thinking about...things, he guessed, shrugging as he disregarded his worry and paid attention to the former as he spoke.
"Oh, nothing, dude. We were just glad that you have homeroom with us, good to, uh, see you, man!" Kwan started off awkwardly, though admittedly, Dash didn't notice.
He didn't want to notice.
It had been too long since the last time he'd seen them, and he just wanted to talk, to hang out, to have things be like they used to be.
Normal.
And it helped that, after a moment or so of shared silence, the others chimed in, appearing more interested int he conversation as they leaned in to join it.
"Oh, I'm great, but Jesus Christ. Thought you guys had sticks up your asses, what, with how uptight you all looked. Are you guys okay?" Dash asked, giving each of them a quizzical look that Kwan, despite his initial reservations, was quick to dispel, but not before taking the schedule from Dash's desk, the teen hardly having the chance to protest before Kwan began to read it over.
"No, it was nothing, dude. Sorry, though, to be fair, Star was the one that didn't think you'd have this homeroom. By the way, you owe me five bucks." Kwan gestured to Star first before turning to Dale, having just finished looking over Dash's schedule.
"Dude, what?! Let me see that!" Without wasting another moment, Dale snatched the schedule from his grip, and his eyes scanned over the paper quickly, mouthing along as he read what was on it. Dash watched him with a touch of discomfort, not entirely sure if he wanted them to look at it, though he wasn't in the business of questioning them about it. After all, he didn't want their first meeting in what felt like forever to be soured because he was being difficult or whatever, though he was confused as to why they wanted to look at it in the first place. However, he would sort of receive his answer when he heard Dale look up from the paper with an annoyed huff. Reaching into his pocket and pulling out his wallet, he thumbed through a few bills before taking out a five-dollar bill and handing it to Kwan who, with a slight of hand, placed it into his pocket, but his only worked to confuse Dash, enough that he forgot how flustered he'd been near Danny and was, instead, intently focused on Kwan's words.
Didn't think he'd have this homeroom?
What did they mean?
"Uh, we always have homeroom together. What made you think I wouldn't have Falluca?" Dash asked, turning to Star as his question had been directed at her. The girl, put on the spot, twirled her hair again, almost looking nervous, though Dash couldn't really ascertain why.
"Oh, uh, well, I mean...we just know math isn't, like, your thing, so we figured you have, I don't know...Tetslaff or something because, like, you love sports or whatever, that's all." She responded quickly, throwing her hair over her shoulder with a passive smile that Dash only partially returned. It wasn't necessarily untrue; he wasn't...the best at math, not that he was terribly interested in the subject to begin with, but...it shouldn't have...no, he was probably just overthinking it. No, he was definitely overthinking it, and he nodded, agreeing with her, though something else still bothered him.
"Oh, cool, cool. Well, what was the bet for?" Dash asked, facing Dale now, though his eyes were trained on Kwan, too.
Kwan seemed to pale at the question, but Dale laughed, leaning on his desk a bit to make sure Dash could hear him.
"Oh, dude, that was totally Kwan's idea. So, basically, we made a bet to see whether you got in a regular math class or, what was it? Oh, one of the, like, aide classes. I told Kwan that you probably in a regular class since I think you passed last year's Pre-algebra course, but no, he was right." Dale explained, tossing his schedule back over at him carelessly, the paper landing on the floor before he turned to talk to Paulina who had struck another conversation besides this one.
But Dash wasn't done.
"Right about what?" He asked, giving Kwan a slight look, and he could see the hesitation on his face as the former turned to Dale, almost seeming as though he didn't want him to say anything, but Dale didn't catch on, not before speaking.
"Oh, something like you would have the aide class. He figured you would have that one, and I checked, and he was right, so I owed him five bucks. Nothing big, dude." Dale explained casually, as if ripping a band-aid off of a wound. Dash was silent.
He...made a bet on that?
Why would he...
"Dude, what? You guys...made a bet? But...why? I mean...I don't - " Rolling her eyes, Paulina tuned in.
"It was just a bet, Dash. It's, like, not that serious. So, anyway..." The girl exclaimed, clearly annoyed to done with talking about the conversation, and as far as he could tell, so was Dale. Kwan didn't say anything else about it, and as far as he could tell, he didn't want to, the teen giving Dash an unreadable look that only caused the air to become tense again.
He wasn't sure how he felt about that, the fact that they'd...though so lowly of him that they would...bet on it?
'Maybe I'm just overreaching...it's like Paulina said, it's was just a bet...right?' The teen tried to reason with himself as he listened to them start other conversations, laughing amongst themselves as he ruminated on the thought. Bending down to pick up the paper from the floor, eying the classes that he had.
It wasn't untrue.
He did have the algebra assistance class, the class for those that just barely scrapped by the year before, the class for those that were so shit at math they thought that you needed help just to read the fucking questions, the class that got you laughed at.
The class that people made bets about.
It wasn't their fault that he was just terrible enough to make it there, so why should he be mad at them for just having a little fun.
It was all true anyway.
He was stupid.
He wasn't smart.
He didn't have many, if any, academic achievements to speak of, so it was his fault that he felt like this.
No, he didn't blame them at all.
In fact, it was pretty funny now that he thought about it.
"No, you guys are right." Dash chimed, beaming at them as he leaned in to hear their conversation. Kwan looked at him, shocked at first before his own smile returned, looking relieved as he turned to face Dash. Feeding off his satisfaction, his approval, Dash knew he was saying the right thing, setting his schedule back upon his desk as he rubbed the back of his neck, chuckling despite the prickling insecurity that budded in his subconscious.
"I'm just pissed I didn't bet on myself. Probably could have made a ton of money, knowing I wasn't gonna get into the actual class, heh." He grinned, joking at his own expense.
No, they were right.
What made him think that he was in a position to be mad at them?
He was just being stupid.
Yeah. Just being stupid.
"Oh my gosh, right?! Me and Star were on the fence, but Kwan was spot on. You're not even good at math, or like...anything but like, sports and stuff, right? I was like 'is he seriously upset', like, it's not that big of a deal." Paulina vocalized, and Star agreed.
And Dash agreed, too.
He didn't get to be mad at them.
Even when it hurt to know that they thought that.
"Y-yeah..." Dash said, giving them a forced grin. Paulina had since turned back to her conversation, and desperate for a distraction from his own tenuous feelings, he leaned forward in his seat to join them.
"So, uh, what're you guys talkin' about? You guys have a good summer?" He asked, quick to change the subject. At his question, Kwan beamed, appearing to forget all about the bet.
"Yeah, if you call studying the whole time a 'good summer'. I've been dying to talk to you about that, though. You won't believe what Dale did..." Kwan started, and Dale hopped in. Dash smiled, forcing the painful blow to his ego and self down, down where he couldn't feel it as he listened to them tell him about their summer.
Dale had gone back to Jamaica to see his folks in Kingston, and had also done a summer internship and scholarship program for
Star and Paulina both went to a gymnastics and cheerleading camp, and also went on vacation to Japan for the rest of the summer.
Kwan had done AP study camps, SAT Training classes, and a load of college tours to get ahead of the game, all the while ending his summer in Shanghai where the rest of his Jiangsu, which, if Dash could be honest, he'd never heard of that place before.
Regardless, they had told him all manner of things that, even though he hadn't been the one to experience them, he couldn't help but feel as though he had. The teen would be first to admit that it was always nice, being able to, if only just a moment, experience what they had, if just for a moment. The teen could feel his questions and thoughts from before melt away as he was greeted visages of places he'd never seen, people he'd never met, things he'd never done, and in the back of his mind, Dash knew, they were likely things he would never get the chance to do. His glimmered as he thought himself in their place, shared only by the vague sense of envy that rang in cool silence deep in his bones at the realization that these things would forever be out of his reach.
Mom and Dad...weren't really into those kinds of things.
He couldn't name a single instance that they'd ever done those sorts of things, not that he was ungrateful for what they did for him now. It was enough just having a roof over his head, a blanket to sleep with, food when he could get it; those things, his parents were more than vocal in reminding him of this...time and time again.
So it wasn't as if he expected them to, or felt himself entitled to it or anything like that...it just would be nice to be able to just...experience those things...but he wasn't the sort to ask.
He just knew that those weren't for him, that's all.
"Wow, you guys sound like you a hell of a summer..." Dash voiced finally when the class began to get settled and they'd each told brief summaries of their travels and the like. For the most part, they spoke amongst themselves, recounting their own affairs without asking him what he'd done (though to be fair, it wasn't nearly as eventful as theirs), not that Dash was one to complain. When they'd finally finished, Dash was sure that this time would be no different, that they would move onto a new topic...but that wasn't what happened.
His eyes widened when, out of the blue, Kwan turned to him, still smiling as he asked him a simple, singular question.
"So, what did you do?" The boy asked, watching Dash expectantly and the others followed suit. At first, Dash hadn't even registered the question, a dull expression riddling his features as he process the question.
"Wait, what? You're...asking me what I...did?" He asked, almost at a loss for words.
They never...people never wondered what he got up to usually...and they'd never done this before, so...he wasn't even sure how to answer that...or if he even could. Dash sputtered, wrought for a answer to what should have been an easy question, and it seemed as though he was taking a long time, or that his question in kind was a dense one as, without a breath wasted, Dale was quick to respond.
"You know what? Yeah; what do you get up to, dude? You haven't really said anything yet, so..." Dale pondered curiously, leaning over his desk and propping his chin upon his open palm with mock interest, and much to Dash's horror, the others did the same.
Dash swallowed as the question turned over and over in his head.
What...had he done?
"Oh, uh..I..." His smile softened a bit until...it faded from his lips.
What...had...he done?
His summers were never usually that eventful, what, with his family hardly leaving the trailer, let alone Amity for any extended period of time. Much of his day was spent there in his corner, biding his time with what he had on hand (which, admittedly...wasn't much).
What...had...he...done?
Dash couldn't name anything specific, anything special (apart from finding Roxie) that happened. Nothing that was out of the ordinary or -
He could feel them...slithering across his skin. Hands...drawn, coarse, calloused, and aged, ripping him apart with every touch. Every muscle in his body screamed, screamed for the pain to end, screamed for them to stop, for it to all stop. Something...hurt...something inside of him hurt, or rather...did everything hurt? He could feel them, pressing against his skin, his back, pushing...pushing something inside of him until he -
Dash tried to force the thought away.
Tried to make it still, silent against the restrained cry that echoed in his head.
His eyes seemed to glaze over, a perversion, an image, a memory, beating into his skull as his everyday came to mind.
That was right.
How...could he forget?
How could he -
"F-fuck! Fuck, he's tight. Thought he'd be loose after all of this, but Allen's boy is...f-fuck" A man moaned over him, taking in a fistful of his hair, thrusting his hips forwards and forcing his hardened flesh into Dash with enough force to scrape his stomach across the dirtied, sullied mattress, his hazy, blue eyes screwed shut with exhaustion as they had their way.
It wasn't anything new.
It was normal, his summer vacation made manifest right then, right there, as they took him again -
"Open your mouth...yeah, just like that - "
And again -
"H-harder...hnnn...y-yeah...I'm...almost - "
And again -
"Bend over - "
And again, and again, and again, and again, and -
"Yo, Earth to Dash. Dude, you still there?" Dale finally said, and Dash snapped to attention, a numb, glossy haze shading over his distant eyes as he fought to regain himself. What was he...his head felt warm, but his skin was cold, prickled with a dusting of sweat that hadn't been there before.
Where had he gone?
He...wasn't even sure what had just happened, but...seeing their confused faces made him want to forget all about it.
He needed to just...keep it together.
He was...fine.
He was always fine.
Chuckling, the song was strangely hollow to his ears even when he smiled, dull eyes painted with false elation as he went to answer.
His summer wasn't worth remembering, nothing worth telling -
NOTHING THAT HE WOULD WANT THEM TO KNOW. FOR THEM TO KNOW HOW DEPRAVED HE WAS, HOW FILTHY HE WAS...THEY WOULD HATE HIM.
HATE HIM, HATE HIM -
HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE -
"Oh, not much. It wasn't nearly as exciting as you guys'. Believe me." He said finally, smiling, the expression hollowed...empty.
Not that they noticed.
"Hmm, well, just figured we'd ask. Not surprising though; you don't get around much. Well, anyway..." With little more consideration, they turned back to their own conversations.
Just as they always did.
'See? They don't give a shit about you.'
'Who would? What is there to care about?'
'You're just wasting everyone's time.'
'Waste of space.'
'No one cares, NO ONE - '
'That's not true, just...just stop talking...please...' He begged them quietly, already feeling utterly and completely exhausted...despite the day having only just begun. But he ignored the feeling, choosing instead to engage with his friends, even when they all but seemed to forget about him in the midst of their conversation. However, as the students around them came to a settled silence, Falluca came to the front of the classroom, gesturing to the whole of his student body before vocalizing to the them firm words.
"Alright, alright, settle down, everyone. Homeroom is nearly over, and the announcements will be on soon, but first...we have some new guests that I imagine need little introduction...you can all come in." He exclaimed, lending a gesturing hand to the door as, once it opened, Dash's eyes widened with surprise, though it was only offset by a crude bitterness that remained firm in his features unconsciously.
"Thank you, . I'm sure that many of you all already know them, but I would like to formally introduce our newest members of the Casper High family..." Behind her, two faces, identical and framed with perfect light as they took center stage at the front of the classroom, and just as they had before, many of the students were left in awe as their coveted names were spoken.
"Please, give them a warm welcome. This...is Percy and Alexander Blackwood." And with a glance to the two of them, the Principal smiled.
And to the class, the twins smiled back.