ACT XIII: Comet II, the Underestimated Part 3: Things Get a Little Wild

One week had passed since the Mewberty incident, and the school had been repaired. Thankfully, none of the students fully understood what had happened to Comet and everyone just assumed the monsters were to blame. The only one who knew the truth was Jonah, but he promised to keep their secret. And while the prince was getting better at controlling his urges, Marcia insisted that if he used magic he would have to do it in secret so as not to draw any unwanted attention. Comet agreed, but insisted that he continue to practice honing his newfound magical powers. Realizing that such power could help against future monster attacks, Marcia and Jonah agreed to help.

That weekend, the trio rode their bikes out of the city and into the desert where they could perform tests uninterrupted. Jonah was particularly excited to study a real-live extraterrestrial and his capabilities. The aspiring scientist brought all of his journals and notebooks, as well as a video camera to record the prince's activities. Marcia, on the other hand, was more concerned for her friends' well-being than scientific discovery or breaking in magical powers. She had brought along a first aid kit and a fire extinguisher. And as for Comet, he vowed to do what he had always dreamed of doing since he was a child: he was going to fly.

Comet stood in the middle of the desert with the scepter tucked away inside his belt. Jonah dutifully manned the video recorder to capture the event, while Marcia stood ready with the fire extinguisher. Comet squatted down into a jumping stance and focused on the four little wings growing out of his back. Using the innate strength he inherited from his mother, the prince leapt thirty feet into the air to give himself a start. He fell back down to Earth, but then immediately jumped back up, going even higher this time. This went on for five minutes, with Comet's altitude increasing with every jump. With one final leap, the prince began to flap his wings as he approached one hundred feet in the air.

"Yes! HA HA!" The prince laughed, cheerfully, as he felt the pleasant tingle of wind brushing against his cheeks. His wings were flapping as hard as he could manage, trying to pick up where his jump had left off, and for a moment he felt as if he would be able to touch the setting sun. But it wasn't enough; his velocity died out and he began to descend back to Earth. "No, no! No!"

Instinctively, Comet took the scepter out from his belt and conjured a protective bubble around his body just in time to cushion the impact of his fall. Marcia rushed over to the crater with the fire extinguisher ready while Jonah followed close behind and scribbled notes down in his journal. The "bad girl" of Echo Creek dropped the extinguisher once she saw that there was no fire, and instead grabbed her first aid kit.

"Comet!" She shouted, inspecting the bubble. "Are you alright?! Are you hurt?! Say something!"

Suddenly, the bubble popped, and a seemingly unharmed prince furiously threw his crown onto the ground. "Fiddlesticks!" Comet angrily kicked the dirt in frustration. "Gosh-diddly-darn! This really ruffles my feathers!"

Marcia closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Please, just say 'fuck.'" She begged.

Comet sneered at her deadpan humor and placed his crown back on his head and began to dust himself off. "It's not fair!" He whined. "I finally got my wings, and they're too weak to let me fly!"

Jonah curiously inspected one of the prince's wings, continuing to sketch and scribble in his journal. "Subject's wings appear to be too small to carry his weight, most likely due to the fact that they are still adolescent. Ho-ho-ho-ho! This is gonna be great material for my new manuscript!"

Marcia glared at her oldest friend. "Not the time, Jonah."

"No, no, it's fine." Comet sighed in disappointment. "We've done enough for today. Let's just go home."

The sun had fully gone down by the time the trio reached the edge of the desert, and the moon was high in the sky. Jonah had the foresight to bring a flashlight to help them get back, safely. However, a low growl rumbled from behind them and the conspiracy theorist slowly tucked the light back into his backpack. Marcia heard the noise, too, and she quietly turned around to see the source.

"Get down!" She hissed and pushed both of the boys under a dead tree before joining them.

Comet was about to voice his confusion, only to be muffled by Jonah's hand. He tried to break free, but stopped once he heard a low growl coming from the distance. Jonah removed his hand away from Comet's mouth and covered his own eyes out of fear, as did Marcia. Comet had never seen Marcia so scared. Cautiously, the prince peeked out from behind the tree and saw something that made his blood run cold. Some kind of menacing creature shrouded in darkness was prowling about in search of food. The moonlight reflected off of the beast's eyes, giving them a frightening glow. As it turned towards the dead tree, the prince fearfully hid back behind it, gripped his scepter and prayed to Stump that the beast would just leave. A few agonizing minutes later, Marcia looked back up to see that the beast was gone.

"What… was… that?" Comet breathed, shakily.

Marcia wiped the sweat from her brow. "La chupacabra." She answered.

"La chupacabra?"

Jonah brushed himself off and took out one of his many journals and a flashlight from his backpack. Comet and Marcia leaned in closely to get a better view at the page Jonah was shining his light on. It was a crude sketch of a canine with a fearsome reptilian head. "According to legend, la chupacabra is a vampiric creature that targets livestock. Particularly goats. No one's ever gotten a clear view of it, but there are a few who claim to have seen it. It was first spotted in Puerto Rico in 1975, but other sightings have come up in Mexico and the southwest United States. It's what got me into conspiracies in the first place! To tremble in fear in person with the real deal!"

"Okay, take it easy, Ordonia." Marcia yawned and turned to walk back to the city. "It's getting late. I say we turn before my mom has a heart attack."

Johan shone the light on his watch to check the time and nodded. "Yeah, you're right. I gotta get home and help my folks make their brownies."

Comet looked down at his scepter as his friends began the trek back to the city. He had fought monsters before, and always did so without fear. But at the sight of that Earth-creature, something inside of him told him that he wasn't meant to fight it. But he had no idea why. Feeling tired, he tucked the scepter back into his belt and ran to catch up with Marcia and Jonah.

Later that night, Marcia had changed into her sweatpants and tank top, tied her hair up into a bun, and brushed her teeth to get ready for bed. She was in her room doing squats and push-ups to help her drift off to sleep when she heard a commotion coming from downstairs. Curious, she abandoned her nightly work-out regimen and tip-toed downstairs where she found her parents peeking around the doorframe to the kitchen.

"What're you doing?" She asked.

Rosa pointed into the kitchen, directing her daughter's attention towards the magic prince sleepwalking towards the refrigerator and began munching on an entire jar of pickles. At first, Marcia didn't understand why Comet's sleepwalking had earned the attention of both of her parents, but the prince suddenly aimed his scepter at the nearest wall and fired a destructive beam of light. Marcia gaped in shock while her parents merely flinched at the sight.

Marcia quickly grabbed a glass, filled it with water, and splashed it in her friend's face. "WAKE UP!" She snapped.

"Huh?! What the-?! Who the-?! Wha-?!" Comet spluttered from the cold shock. "What'd you do that for?! As a matter of fact, what are you even doing in - your kitchen?"

"You were sleepwalking again, your highness." Angelo explained.

"'Again?'" Marcia asked. "You mean Comet's done this before?"

"Well, blasting a hole in the wall was new." Rosa spoke up. "But, yes. Your father and I have caught Comet walking in his sleep for the past few days."

The prince turned towards the wall he had obliterated and cupped his hands over his mouth in shock. He aimed his scepter at the wall again. "Reconstruction-Repair Beam." The bricks, drywall, and paint swirled around the room and reassembled themselves around the hole until it looked good as new. "I-I apologize for the inconvenience, Mr. and Mrs. Diaz." He bowed, respectfully.

Angelo gently patted the boy's shoulder. "Well, you did fix it. Just go back to bed and we'll see you at breakfast in the morning."

A few hours later, Marcia was fast asleep and blissfully dreaming about her future with Jackson Lee Thomas. She was just about to reach the honeymoon part of her fantasy when she was rudely awakened by a soft explosion. Cursing under her breath, she made her way downstairs and saw Comet blasting random parts of the living room with his scepter while still asleep. Marcia rushed over to him and slapped him awake. Once again, Comet cast a spell to repair all the damage he'd done in his sleep before heading back to his room.

"Dude, what's going on with you?!"

"I don't know!" Comet groaned. "It could be a side-effect of my Mewberty phase."

Marcia considered their options. "Hmm. Didn't you say everyone in your family goes through this? Why don't you call your dad, tell him what's going on, and ask him for help?"

"No!" Comet protested, fearfully. "If my dad finds out what I did while I was going through Mewberty, he'll kill me! Then he'll turn me into a zombie and send me to St. Olaf's School for Wayward Princes! Then after they're done torturing me, they'll send me back to my dad so he can kill me again!"

Marcia rolled her eyes. "Comet, I highly doubt your dad will turn you into a zombie."

"He could if he wanted to!" The prince opened up the Great Book to the first chapter and pointed to one of Skywind's spells. "See?!"

Marcia squinted as she tried to read the King of Hours' calligraphy. "... I'll be damned." She huffed, slightly disturbed. "Okay, then, just… don't tell him about what you did while going through Mewberty. Just tell him you started, and you have a few questions."

"You… you want me to lie?" Comet paled at the thought.

Marcia shrugged. "Yeah. I mean, it's not that hard. People lie all the time. 'Oh, your baby is so cute. No, that dress doesn't make you look fat. I love the sweater you got me for Christmas. I can't wait to read your manuscript, Jonah.'"

Comet shook his head. "No, you don't understand, I've never lied to my dad before. I've never lied to anyone before."

Marcia pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. "Of all the foreign exchange students in the world, I get stuck with Mr. Rogers Jr." She muttered, exasperated. "Okay, uh, don't think of it as lying. Just think of it as… okay, you'll just tell your dad that you're going through Mewberty; that's true. That it got a little scary for you; that's true. That you found a way to manage it; that's true. And that you have questions; that's true. See? It's not really lying, it's just leaving out the parts that would make your parents freak out. Comprende?"

Comet rubbed his chin as he considered Marcia's words. The prince cracked his knuckles in preparation for the upcoming call with his father. He led Marcia back up to his bedroom and stood in front of the magic vanity mirror hanging on his wall.

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall… call dad." Comet paled as he saw the name he had accidentally pressed on his magic mirror.

"Calling 'Tiffany.'"

"No! No, no, no, no!" Comet groaned. "I didn't mean to do that! I did not mean to call-!"

"Comet?! Snookums, is that you?!" An image of a three-eyed, horned demon princess appeared in the mirror. She rapidly clapped her hands, delighted to see the prince. "Oh, baby, I knew you still liked me-!"

"No!" Comet pointed, sternly. "No. No. I meant to call my dad! This was an accident."

"Oh, come on, sweetheart!" Tiffany begged. "We had our problems, but we can work it out-"

"No! You're not getting back in my head!" Comet decided. "Goodbye!"

"DON'T HANG UP!"

Comet pressed the red x on his mirror, ending the call. The prince tiredly rubbed a hand over his face as he called the proper number. "I've got to delete her from my contacts."

"Ex-girlfriend?" Marcia asked.

"Something like that." Comet sighed. At last, the mirror displayed an image of Mars, the Undaunted. The king had fallen asleep at his desk after another grueling day of paperwork. Comet turned to Marcia who just shrugged. He turned back to the mirror and cupped his hands around his mouth. "Hey, dad, are you awake?" He whispered. Mars didn't respond so the prince raised his voice. "Hey, dad, are you awake?" The king shifted, slightly, but still didn't look up. Comet's brow furrowed. "HEY, DAD! ARE YOU AWAKE?!" Mars woke up with a start and fell backwards from his desk. Comet winced as his father pulled himself back up to his feet to face the mirror. "Heh-heh. Hey, dad. Are you awake?"

"I'm awake now." Mars groaned, tiredly. "Why are you calling me at this unstumply hour? What do you want?"

Comet cleared his throat as Marcia gave him an encouraging thumbs-up. "Well, you see, something came up the other day… and I was hoping you could give me some advice."

"Well, I'm listening." The king sighed and rested his chin on his fist.

"Okay, so, I was at school and I noticed-"

"MOVE IT OR LOSE IT, DRAGONFLY!" Mars was suddenly pushed out of the way and Comet got a clear view of his mother. "There's my little shooting-star! Are you eating enough? Are the humans treating you okay? Do you have a girlfriend yet and is she coming over for Mewnipendence Day?"

"Oh. Hey, mom." Comet waved, awkwardly. "Yeah, I'm having fun here, but I really need to talk to dad right now."

"What could be so important that you can't talk to your own mother?!" The queen scolded.

"W-well, it's just that I'm going through Mewberty now, and-"

"Mewberty?!" Lake squealed with joy and helped her husband back up. "Mars! Our little boy is becoming a man!"

"Lake, don't embarrass the boy." Mars insisted as he sat back down at the desk. "But, that is good news, son. How was your first experience with channeling magic without the scepter?"

"Uh… um… it was certainly… something." Comet nervously stammered. "But, uh, I was hoping you could explain a few things for me."

"Certainly, now that you're going through Mewberty, your body is beginning to learn how to naturally tap into magic." To demonstrate his statement, Mars activated his own matured Mewberty form. The king's cheek marks shone brightly, his skin had changed into a radiant turquoise, four more arms sprouted from his torso, dragonfly wings grew from his back, and his eyes sprouted thirty-thousand hexagonal facets.

"Whoa…" Comet beamed in awe; no matter how many times he saw it happen, he was amazed by his father's transformation. Even Marcia was impressed.

"Your body will become saturated in magical energy. Strengthening your muscles. Your skin. Your senses. You will grow stronger with every passing day. The only way to know how strong is to keep testing your limits."

"Uh, thanks, dad." Comet nodded. "But, I actually wanted to ask; when you went through Mewberty, did you ever sleepwalk and cast spells at random?"

Mars arched an eyebrow and reverted back to his natural form. "Uh, no. Have you been doing that?"

"... mmmmaybe." Comet tugged at the collar of his pajamas and all of his courage immediately disappeared. "Anyway, thanks for answering my questions! Sorry for waking you up! Good to see you, too, mom! I love you both! Bye!'

Before either the king or queen could respond, Comet ended the call and unplugged his mirror. The prince sat down on his bed and buried his face in his hands, ashamed of himself for keeping secrets from his parents. Meanwhile, Marcia was thinking about what the king had said. If Comet's sleep-spelling didn't have anything to do with Mewberty, then there was a possibility that it was a psychological problem. An excited smile spread over her lips.

"What is wrong with me?!" Comet cried softly. "Am I broken? Maybe I'm not meant to be a prince."

"Comet, you're gonna be fine." Marcia promised as she sat down next to him. "Because I can help you!"

Comet looked surprised. "You can? How?"

Marcia grabbed her friend's hand and gently led him into her bedroom. She sat him down on her bed and went over to her closet to pull out a stack of books. "So, the reason I keep my grades up despite wanting to look like a bad girl, is because I've always wanted to go to college and become a psychotherapist!"

"A psychotherapist?" Comet rubbed his chin. "What is that?"

"It's a person who studies the mind and behavior to help others with mental health." Marcia explained. "And I've been teaching myself for years! In other words, Prince Comet Dragonfly II, I can fix your brain!"

"Oooooooh!" Comet nodded in understanding. "Yeah, we have something like that on Mewni."

Comet thought back to the days of his youth when he watched a man with clinical insanity be launched into the side of a mountain with a catapult.

"Yeeeeeah, no." Marcia shook her head as she slipped a sweater vest over her tank top and put on a pair of glasses. After releasing her hair from its bun and pushing the chair from her desk over to the bed, she sat down and took out a notepad and pen. "Okay, your royalness, say 'hello' to Dr. Marcia Diaz. Ph.D."

"What does 'Ph.D' stand for?" Comet asked.

Before Marcia could reply, Angelo walked by the door with a teasing grin. "Pretty hot darling."

"DAD!" Marcia blushed, angrily. "Go back to bed!"

"So how do we do this?"

"It's easy." Marcia shrugged as she opened one of her textbooks. "According to my studies, sleepwalking is caused by stress. So, I'll put you through a series of psychological tests, and then use the information I gather from the results to try and solve your problem."

Comet clapped, excitedly. "Oh, good! I'm great at tests!"

"We'll see." Marcia smiled and began making notes. "Subject is a fourteen-year-old magic prince from another dimension. He has already revealed to me that he feels pressure from his upcoming responsibilities, and has been unable to make friends… let's get started."

Test #1: ROLE PLAY!

"For this test, I want to see how you perceive the people who know you." Marcia explained. "So, I want you to impersonate someone close to you."

Comet rubbed his chin before an idea crept into his mind. He ran over to Marcia's closet and shut the door behind him. Marcia was confused until the prince kicked the door open, revealing that he had dressed himself in her clothes.

"¿Qué pasa? I'm Marcia! My leather jacket looks so cool worn over this red hoodie! I've got parents who love and support me unconditionally, no matter how much of a jerk I act towards them! Ooh, here comes Jackson Lee Thomas! I'm gonna impress him by acting all cool and aloof! I got this sexy lil' mole."

Marcia glared at her friend. "I don't know what pisses me off more. That you took that way too literally… or that my skinny jeans look way better on you."

Comet smiled and struck another pose for her.

Test #2: ART THERAPY!

"Okay, let's try this." Marcia set up a canvas with multiple tubes of paint and paintbrushes. "Everyone knows that art is the truest expression of oneself. Comet, I want you to take the next twenty minutes painting whatever comes to your mind."

Comet looked down at the canvas. "Uh, I'm… I'm not really the best artist, Marcia."

"You don't have to be." Marcia promised. "This is just to get an idea of what's on your mind. Paint whatever you want."

She set a timer for twenty minutes and went downstairs to the kitchen to get a midnight snack. Once she left, Comet took a deep breath and began stroking the pastels against the canvas. While Marcia was in the kitchen, she grabbed a bag of tortilla chips and some cheese to make nachos. She had just placed the plate in the microwave when her ears perked up to a low growling noise coming from behind her. She turned around but saw no immediate threat. The microwave went off as the nachos were finished, so she dismissed the noise and made her way back upstairs.

"So, how're you doing?" She asked.

"Just one last stroke, aaaaaaand… done!" Comet set the paintbrush down and stepped back from the canvas. The prince beamed as he waited to hear his friend's feedback.

The painting depicted Comet and Marcia fighting Luna and Buff Frog, while a crowd of people ran away. Comet was dressed in a suit of armor while Marcia appeared to be wearing a pair of red boxing gloves, a black leotard, and boots. A tower in the background had two stick figures at the top. Luna and Buff Frog were carrying laser guns. And an angry unicorn was charging out of Comet's scepter.

"Hmmm… interesting." Marcia mused, thoughtfully. "It looks like you drew us fighting Luna and Buff Frog in front of a crowd. Why?"

"Well, to be honest, I always thought it was so fun to fight alongside you, Marcia." Comet blushed, lightly. "Fighting monsters side-by-side with my best friend is way more fun than sitting on a throne and making dumb laws. And I gave you boxing gloves to protect your hands!"

"Hm. Okay. And what's with the tower?"

"Oh, that's so my parents can see us!" Comet went on. "They're going to see how capable I am of protecting the kingdom and scepter!"

"Okay, and let's focus on your drawing of you in particular." Marcia adjusted her glasses as she got a closer look. "It looks like you're wearing something that's not your usual attire."

"Oh, that's the suit of armor my father wore when he went to war against the monsters." Comet explained, smiling. "It's always been a dream of mine to get tailored for a suit of my own so that I can go around protecting the innocent from evildoers like all the noble knights in the stories my mother told me as a child."

"Hmm, interesting…" Marcia scribbled something on her notepad. "So your main focus is protecting others, not fighting monsters?"

"Well, yeah." Comet shrugged. "I mean, what else would I use all that power for?"

"And why did you paint me with green hair?"

"Oh, Jonah told me you dyed it green one time, and I just wanted to see what that would look like for myself." Comet explained.

"... I'm gonna kill him." Marcia promised herself.

Test #3: INKBLOTS!

Marcia sat down in front of her friend with a stack of ten-by-ten pieces of paper resting in her lap. "Okay, I'll show you a series of inkblots and you tell me what you see. Here's the first one." She held it up and Comet stared at it.

"Hmm… an inkblot! I win!" He cheered.

Marcia facepalmed. "No, I mean, what does it remind you of?"

"Oh, right." Comet took another look. "Hmm… it looks like… Indexia hovering over the Great Book of Magic."

"Okay, yes! Like that!" Marcia set the inkblot aside and lifted the next one. "How about this?"

"Hmm, oh! That looks like a creepy little alien in a gnome cap!" Comet thought out loud. "Maybe I'm sleep-spelling because I'm being controlled by a creepy little alien in a gnome cap."

"Uh, no. Okay, now what does this-" Marcia groaned as she saw that the next inkblot was just a single dot in the center of the paper. "Hang on, this one's a mistake-"

Comet gasped in shock and his pupils shrank. "That reminds me of my crippling need to appease my father by acting as the perfect heir to the throne no matter how I truly feel about taking on the responsibilities of being a king for the rest of my life."

Marcia gawked as her brain tried to process the prince's words. Suddenly, the results of her tests and the prince's earlier outburst in the desert began to make sense. "...I think we found the root of your problem." She smiled and set down the inkblots. "You have father issues!"

"WOO-HOO!" Comet pumped his fists. "I have father issues!"

Marcia shook her head. "N-no, that's bad."

"Aw." Comet frowned, sadly. "I have father issues."

"Hey, cheer up." Marcia lightly punched her friend's shoulder. "Don't worry, your highness, this means we're making progress. Identifying the problem is the first step towards recovery."

"Recovery…" Comet whispered, happily.

ANALYSIS!

A few minutes later, Comet was laying down on the bed while Marcia sat next to him and took notes while he opened his heart to her. He told her about his earliest memory of his father; how a question about his grandfather made the king cry. From that day forward, Comet hated himself for upsetting his own father in such a manner, so he dedicated his life to being the perfect prince and taking up the throne to be a good ruler. But no matter how hard he studied and how well he behaved, his father had barely spent any time with him growing up. Then he revealed that sometimes he felt as if he didn't even want to become a king when he grew up, and would rather spend his adult years using his magic to help people directly.

"Okay, it's all very clear to me." Marcia concluded.

"What?"

"You need to talk to your father and tell him how you feel."

"What?!" Comet fell off of the bed in shock and bolted upwards. "I can't tell him that! What will he think if he finds out his only son doesn't want to do the one thing he was born to do?!"

"Comet, if your issues with your father are what's causing your sleep-spelling, you have to resolve it." Marcia reasoned. "Besides, you can't keep breaking and rebuilding my house."

"First you tell me to lie to him, now you want me to tell him the truth?" Comet huffed. "You're like a rollercoaster of hypocrisy!"

"Hey, you're the one who keeps blowing up my house!" Marcia snapped. "I'm trying to help you!"

"Well, you're not!" Comet slammed his fist towards the wall, but hit something softer instead.

"OW!"

Comet and Marcia stared in confusion at the area he had struck. "Uh… did the wall just say 'ow?'" Marcia asked.

Suddenly, a hideous goblin materialized out of thin air, startling the two friends into jumping backwards. He was a scaly goblin dressed in a regal suit with a silver crown resting on his head. "Damn it! My plan is foiled!" He cursed.

"Uh… who are you?"

"Who am I?! What are you, retarded?!" The goblin sneered. "I'm Prince Smoosh of the Goblins! And you've nearly killed me like fifty times this past week!"

"Well, what are you even doing here?!" Comet spluttered indignantly. "I don't even know you!"

"Fine, I'll tell you my ingenious plan!" Prince Smoosh cackled with glee. "I struck a deal with Luna and her monster army! I would use my camouflage powers to sneak into your house and kidnap you! But every time I got close enough while you were sleeping, you'd grab that damn scepter and shoot at me!"

"Ooooooh…" Marcia scratched her cheek. "So you weren't sleep-spelling because of psychological problems… your body was just reacting to an invisible threat."

"Yeah, that makes sense." Comet nodded. "But why? Why would you make a deal with Luna? What do you get out of it?"

"Well, you see… I was sent by my asshole parents to St. Olaf's Academy for Wayward Princes!" Smoosh explained, enjoying the frightened expression on Comet's face. "But I finally managed to escape! And when I met Luna, we made a deal. I'd kidnap you, bring you back to her, give her the scepter, and then I would cut off your face, then cut off my face, swap our faces, and then you'd take my place at that miserable hell-hole while I get to kick back and relax on Earth for the rest of my life!"

Comet and Marcia shared a glance. Then they both laughed.

"That is the stupidest plan I've ever heard!" Marcia wheezed.

"Yeah!" Comet giggled. "I mean, what kind of idiot would believe you were me just because you're wearing my face?!"

"Hey, fuck you! It's a good plan!" Smoosh growled. "But you know what? It doesn't matter! Because Luna's army is right outside! And now that I've tired you out, it will be child's play to deliver you to Luna!"

It wasn't.

Ten minutes later, Comet and Marcia had defeated Smoosh and Buff Frog's small battalion and were now sitting on the roof to enjoy the night sky. Marcia sighed and looked down at her lap. "I'm sorry, Comet."

Comet was confused. "For what?"

"Well, I just… I know we said we could be honest with each other but… I don't want to be seen as the bad girl for the rest of my life. And I used you as a guinea pig to practice my psychotherapy skills. And then I tried to push you into something you're not ready for. So, yeah. I'm sorry."

Comet playfully removed the glasses from Marcia's face and placed them over his own eyes, mimicking her voice as he spoke. "Subject is a fourteen-year-old safe girl who pretends to be a bad girl for the sake of reputation and fear of vulnerability. However, her behavior shows that even though she makes mistakes, she is still the best friend anyone could ask for who can kick fanny as best as the rest of them!"

Marcia snatched her glasses back from him, but smiled regardless. "Y'know, I still think you should tell your dad how you really feel." she remarked. "But this time, I'll let you wait until you decide you're ready."

Comet watched his friend reenter the house through her bedroom window and looked back up at the stars, contemplating her advice.

To Be Continued!

Epilogue:

Back on Mewni, Luna and her minions had returned Prince Smoosh to St. Olaf's before heading back to their castle to lick their wounds.

"I think we almost won this time…" Buff Frog wheezed in pain, trying to keep up morale. "Good effort, everyone."

"Aw, shut up, Buff Frog!" Battling-Ram gripped as he placed a solid block of ice on his crotch. "That punching-girl planted her foot right on my balls and did a fucking pirouett! I can still feel them unwinding!"

While the monsters disappeared into the Forest of Certain Death, Prince Smoosh was roughly escorted into the dismal boarding school. Despite his desperate cries for help - and the fact that none of their bedroom doors were locked - none of the other princes dared to leave for fear of punishment. At last, the guards brought him into Headmaster Atrocious' private quarters and strapped his wrists, ankles, and head to a reinforced steel chair. The guards left Smoosh alone in darkness, locking the door behind them. Prince Smoosh struggled with all of his strength, trying in vain to break free from his restraints. However, he froze in fear as a pair of eyes emerged from the shadows, glowing with a sickly green aura.

"Congratulations, Prince Smoosh…" Headmaster Atrocious smirked, wickedly. "You are the first student to escape the school. And you will also be the last."

Headmaster Atrocious' past was shrouded in mystery, but he held a haunting reputation of running St. Olaf's since Festivio the Fun held the scepter. No one knew how he would have been able to live for so long, but no one dared to question it. The only ones who knew that he sustained himself by draining the life-force from the worst princes attending his school never lived long enough to tell anyone.

"I could have forgiven you for trying to escape. I could have even forgiven you for trying to trick me by sending another prince in your place. But when you insulted my mentor's legacy, well… that just made me angry." The headmaster growled as he closed in on his latest victim. "People piss themselves when I'm angry."

As the other princes tried to fall asleep, the halls of St. Olaf's were filled with the horrified screams of Smoosh.

Author's notes: To that guest who said they didn't understand the joke at the end, just... don't ask. Don't look it up. Do you and your search history a favor and don't try to figure it out. Please, read and review!