Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or One Piece. Folks, if I did I would be cackling over knowing exactly what One Piece is...and having a real pirate ship. Dammit I need to stop playing Black Flag.
"Talk" Talking
'Think' Thinking
On the warm July morning I met with a great man, even now after all these years I still consider him one of the greatest influences on my life. This person was Jinbe "The Knight of the Sea".
If you don't know who he is, then you've either lived in a cave all your life, you're too young to know about him, or you're just dumb as a Sea Cow. If you're either of these things then allow me to explain. Jinbe was a Royal Knight in Neptune's Army, The Second Captain of the Sun Pirates, and my future teacher.
I literally bumped into the guy in the Fishman District when I went to go to work for Madame Shyarly. I was star struck, at the age of eight I was standing in front of a legend like Fisher Tiger. It was possibly the greatest event in my young life, and may have been the only thing as well.
But then...a ship crashed at the entrance of Fishman Island. That was where met my first human, and saw first hand how horrible they could be.
"This simply will not do!" Igaram bellowed from his position on the deck of the ship.
"Oh what now?" Naruto groaned irritably as he placed his pen into the into it's proper spot with the ink well and removed himself from his chair. He moved from the room hidden in the bowels of the ship and emerged in the sunlight.
There he saw Igaram; thankfully clad in a cheap suit that they picked up at an island the day they brought him onto the ship. At first Naruto did not mind the man being on board, but then he started being a pain in his ass. For five days the man scoured the ship, pointing out various flaws and damages that they missed or had yet to take care of. It was mainly the lack of electricity, a foul smell, and one of the bathrooms being broken thanks to Gin's "sessions".
The blond fishman looked around the deck, and saw Igaram looking at Bashura. He raised an eyebrow watching the savage-looking man curled up on the deck, practically purring in delight at the warm sun hitting his tattooed skin...weird. It had to have been an effect of that devil fruit of his.
Kotetsu was looking down at the scene with tired eyes. Now Naruto let most of the crew stay to themselves, but even he noticed their swordsman had not been sleeping well. In fact he was starting to look a lot like Gin with the bags he was developing.
"All right, what is it now curly?" Naruto asked Igaram, giving him his fitting nickname.
"I was informed by your crew mates on how you acquired this ship. And I find it very unfitting." Igaram said, taking the nickname in stride, figuring it was just a temporary thing. Oh, how wrong he was.
"If you're going to patronize me about stealing from pirates, then you and I are gonna have a problem." Naruto developed a tick mark on his left cheek, "I took you on here on a whim, figuring you would guide us to Alabasta. But if you keep up with this complaining..." He let the threat hang.
"I do not care about that." The Captain of the Royal Guard waved his hands in a hurry. "Tell me what is the name of this ship?"
"The Bezan Black." Bashura answered, uncurling himself and stretching his body out like a cat would.
"That just won't do, if you capture a ship, then you can rename it." Igaram said, gesturing the entire ship with his right hand. "I can see you went through the trouble to get rid of every trace of its former occupants, it's not the same ship it used to be. Plus, isn't it considered bad luck to sail in a ship you captured and not renamed it?"
"He's got you there Uzumaki!" Kotetsu yawned out from the crows nest. "Go and rename her, you're the Captain after all."
"Dammit I'm..." The blond stopped himself from yelling at him. He did agree to be the Captain of the ship, but he didn't like it. "Fine, what would be a good name?"
"Something tough." The four heard a weak voice behind them. They turned to see an absolutely battered Gin leaning against the wall of the aft part of the deck. He looked absolutely horrible, his skin was losing its tan color, he was thinner than they remembered, and he was shaking from the wind.
"Damn Gin, you all right?" Naruto asked his First Mate.
"Not really, I feel like hammered shit." Gin coughed out, his entire body wracking with agony. "But don't worry, Carmen's making up something that'll settle. Now name the ship, we don't want something that makes us look like pussies."
"You're right about that," Naruto ignored the nagging feeling in his head, Gin really didn't look too good. The blond thought for several minutes, going over various names before settling on one that sounded good. "I'm gonna name her Nautilus."(1)
"What does that translate to?" Bashura tilted his head quizzically.
"It roughly translates as Sword that splits the ocean." Naruto shrugged his broad shoulders. Hey, he was called "Sword of the Sea", might as well give it the same thing.
"I think it translates to Sailor, Uzumaki!" Kotetsu called from above.
"It translates to Sword that splits the ocean! And that's that dammit!" Naruto hollered back. He refused to take it back, it stayed and that's final. (2)
"Ha, that sounds good to me." Gin managed to grit out, he coughed one last time before collapsing against the wooden wall of the aft.
"Holy shit, Gin!" Naruto was the first to reach his collapsed First Mate. He raised his hand to the man's forehead, and immediately pulled it away when he felt searing heat coming from it. "God damn, his fever is staggering. Bashura!"
"Yes, Cap'n?!" The big man got onto his feet.
"Get your treatment ready, water, and whatever else we need. Igaram, you carry him to the bed, I'll go grab Carmen. Come on already!" He harshly barked out orders, getting both the navigator and guest of the motley crew to get to it. Bashura bolted to his room to get the ingredients, and Igaram didn't protest in picking the poisoned man up and took him to the infirmary within the ship.
Naruto spat to the side, narrowing his eyes at the sea. "This is just one thing after another." He then looked up into the sky, and sighed loudly. "Who did I piss off in my past life to deserve this?"
"Hell if I know Uzumaki." Kotetsu answered him, "Maybe life just doesn't like you!"
"Ah, who asked you!?" The fishman retorted.
(The Nautilus - Four Days Later)
"His fever still hasn't broken." Bashura sighed out tiredly.
The infirmary was surprisingly well equipped for a ship that was lit up with candles and oil lamps. It held ten beds, rolls of gauze, stitching supplies, oxygen masks, empty jars for medical supplies, cotton swaps, tongue depressors, IV's with bags, cabinets containing different medical ingredients that all of them could not make heads or tails of, a trash can, and oddly enough a defibrillator
Lying in one of the beds within the infirmary was a a horrific-looking Gin. His face was covered in sweat, his breaths labored, his skin was clammy to the touch. He looked like he was a foot away from walking into the afterlife and there was not a thing they could do about it.
It pissed Naruto off greatly. He fully admitted to himself that he didn't like these people, but to see someone like him in this bad a shape, and feeling powerless to do something about it brought up the bad memory of Queen Otohime's murder. He hated that feeling more than humans. The feeling of hopelessness was worse than any wound he had ever taken.
"Your treatments haven't had any effect either." Carmen stated, held in her hand was a pink handkerchief that was the same color as her dress. She heard Gin groan in agony before swiping it across his forehead again.
"I think he's far past what I can do." Bashura said looking at the various medical ingredients that made absolutely no sense to him. "Cap'n, we need a real doctor, and fast."
"I know." Naruto palmed him forehead in frustration. "But where would we find such a person? Kotetsu, Gin, and I have a combined one-hundred and twenty million Beli bounty on our heads. We would need either to pay out the ass for one to come aboard, or find one that's willing to come along. Tell me where would we find those types of people?"
"I wish I knew Cap'n. I wish I knew."
"I think I know." Kotetsu's voice caused the remaining members to turn towards him. The sandy-haired teen was leaning against the door frame of the room, his athletic arms crossed, and his head tilted to the side.
"Kotetsu, who's keeping watch?" Naruto questioned, not wishing for a repeat of the last time he left his post.
"Igaram volunteered. Now hear me out." Kotetsu said walking over to Gin's bedside. "We suck with medicine, hell my chest is still giving me trouble." He tapped his chest to make his point, wincing as the bandages stuck to his wound under his shirt and fresh hoodie. Thar wasn't the best idea he had to date. "I say we head over to Drum Island."
"Drum Island?" Carmen questioned. "What is so special about that place?"
"Well just like your Cook Island, or wherever you're gonna meet your assistants, Drum Island has some of the best doctors in the world." Kotetsu gave them a grin before his face fell in depression. "But my data is nearly three years old, so I could be wrong as dirt."
"It's better than what we got so far." Naruto said. "Bashura, set a destination to Drum Island."
"It does not work like that, Cap'n," The savage-looking navigator waved his hands at the fishman. "From the map, and my Log Pose, we got one more island before arriving at that particular island."
"And which island is that?"
"Naruto!" Igaram barged through the door, his breaths ragged from exertion. "I apologize for the intrusion, but I saw land a couple miles out."
"That would be Little Garden, Cap'n."
(Little Garden – Half an hour later)
Once docking upon the sandbar, Naruto, Bashura, and Igaram set foot onto the island. Leaving Kotetsu and Carmen to look after Gin.
Naruto wrinkled his nose and gripped the hilt of Saibannin Kayiouumi, his gigantic anchor axe. "This place smells funny."
"Whew, it sure is humid." Igaram wiped his forehead. "But this is nothing compared to Alabasta's deserts."
Naruto only coughed in response. Something didn't feel right, the air was too constricting, he was finding it a little hard to breathe. "Let's just get this over with. Come on, lets gather some fresh water. Keep your eyes peeled as well, I don't like this place one bit."
"Got it Cap'n." Bashura gripped his harpoon tightly.
"As you wish." Igaram patted his borrowed pistol and made sure his necktie was secured to the cannons hidden in his curls.
The trio walked into the prehistoric-looking forest, brushing away the first bushes they were greeted by tall trees, trees that were far taller than any fishman Naruto that had ever seen, and grass that was far taller than him. "God, where are we going to find a river in this?"
"I have an idea, Cap'n." Bashura grinned, and getting on all fours he drew on the power of his devil fruit. Instead of become a hulking hybrid, he went into a sleeker form of an actual black panther. It was actually an impressive sight seeing six-hundred pounds of muscle and fur wearing a top hat.
Bashura wagged his tail once, before leaping high into one of the trees. His claws caught onto the bark, and he began to climb up the giant tree with such grace, that it amazed Igaram; and Naruto to a lesser extent until he reached the top. The cat man's eyes gazed over the area, searching for a stream, or any sort of danger. "Cap'n, I see something white in the forest!"
"That really doesn't help, what does it look like!" Naruto yelled up where the cat man was perched on a branch.
"It looks like a house, it's seven clicks east from here!"
Naruto had no clue what a click was. So using his Captain position he yelled up at his navigator. "All right, you lead and we'll follow!"
Soon enough Naruto and Igaram found themselves cutting through the forest, figuratively, and in Naruto's case literally with his anchor axe felling trees. An hour soon passed and the three were no closer to getting to the white house.
BOOM!
"What on earth was that!?" Igaram bellowed.
"How the hell would I...oh dear Neptune." A giant boot crashed in front of them, and a sound that reminded them of cannon fire echoed above their heads. The boot fell away, only for a pair of yellow shoes to take its place. There was another loud boom of cannon fire, and the yellow shoe-thing twisted in their direction and fell backwards, it's entire size blotting out the sun.
"Run for your freaking lives!" Naruto's scream echoed through the area.
"AHH I DON'T WANT TO DIE!" Igaram took off running, screaming his curly head off, and tears of fear flowing from his wide eyes.
The two managed to clear the area before the giant body hit the ground, creating a shock wave that lifted the two of them off the ground and smashed them through two trees before they settled onto the ground.
Immediately getting to his feet, Naruto heard two distinctive laughs. Laughing? No way, it couldn't be. Picking the unconscious Igaram up, the blonde fishman bolted over to the area of devastation. Arriving at the now, as he called it battlefield he could not believe what he laid his eyes on.
The first figure he saw was a large, no scratch that, giant man. He was extremely well-built with a long black beard. He was dressed in an outfit that had a leather haramaki with iron buckles around his midsection, along with a leather belt that went diagonally across his muscular chest, dark green pants, furred brown boots, and wore a dark blue cape. Resting upon his head was a helmet that went over his eyes.
The second gigantic figure was a little more well rounded, but dressed in a similar uniform, only his was a red overall with golden button straps, fur linings, a leather strap around his right shoulder and another as a belt, yellow pants with black stripes and fur linings at the bottom, yellow shoes, a black cape, and a red helmet with two horns. He had blond beard shaped like an axes blade, beady eyes, and a pig-like nose.
"Another tie Brogy, well done!" The bearded one said.
"Same to you Dorry, well fought." The other one got to his feet and looked in there general direction. Instead of being attacked like Naruto thought they would, Brogy gave him a wide, toothy grin. "Dorry, we got visitors!"
"So, you're right." Dorry got to his feet, looking upon Naruto's smaller form. "Oh, and he's a fishman too. Don't see a lot of them in these parts."
"Uh...hey?" Naruto sweat-dropped at the sight of these two...whatever they were. This was completely unexpected. "Am I interrupting something?"
"Just our hourly fights," Brogy waved him off and crouched to take a good look at the stranger. "Who are you? And what brings you to Little Garden?"
What strange people. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto." He dropped Igaram seeing that there was no danger there. "That's my ships temporary guest, Igaram, Captain of the Royal Guard of Alabasta. And...Bashura get your furry ass down here!"
"Sorry, Cap'n!" Bashura leaped from one of the trees surrounding him, landing on his paws he turned back into his savage-looking form. "I was up there just in case they turned violent, would have jumped on their backs and tore em' up real good."
"Gegyagyagyagya!" Dorry gave them his distinct laugh. "We won't harm anyone unless they try to harm us, like that weasel candle man. Oh how he burns me just thinking about what he did!"
"At least the Straw Hats prevented it from getting a lot worse." Brogy shrugged his shoulders. "We'll find him, or the animals will."
"The Straw Hats were here!?" The ruefully awakened Igaram hopped to his feet. "Tell me, did you see a blue-haired girl with them? Is she all right, did any harm come upon her!?" Naruto his him on the head to shut him up, sending the man face first into the ground.
"Sorry about that, he's that girl's protector." He pointed at the conscious, but twitching human. "But, did you happen to see her?"
"Oh yea, we saw her. She was fine dispute getting coated in candle wax." Dorry noticed Igaram practically have a heart attack from hearing that. "There was some trouble here, two guys who called themselves Baroque Works interfered with our fight."
"Dorry nearly lost his life because of their villainy." Brogy snorted steam from his nose. "This was nearly a week ago, tops. And we still have not found the snakes that did this. We checked that candle house, but found no hide nor hair of them."
"I see..." Bashura mused to himself, "Tell me, how long does it take for a Log Pose to change on this island? We're in quite a hurry."
"Fraid it'll take a whole year." Dorry said.
"What?" Naruto asked, a little outraged that he would have to spend a whole year here. "But you said that those Straw Hats were were no more than a week ago. How the crap did they leave?"
"We gave them one of the many Log Pose's that were left here by those who either fled or were killed on the island." Brogy said, reaching his pinkie finger into his ear. "We've collected plenty of them throughout our one-hundred years of staying on this island."(3)
One-hundred years? Naruto wanted to call bullshit. "You're not abnormally large humans, are you?"
"Nope, we're giants. We're in the prime of our lives here, and we got another two-hundred if we're lucky enough." Dorry reached out with one of his giant hands. "Hop on, we'll take you to our camp. The three of you must be starving after trekking this far."
"That's mighty kind of you." Igaram got to his feet, completely oblivious to the front of his outfit being completely dirty, or the small amount of blood running down the side of his head.
"I'm game." Bashura hopped into Dorry's hand, and plopped down like it was a comfy chair. "Come on Cap'n, you know you want to."
"Oh, all right. What's the harm in it?" Naruto walked onto Dorry's outstretched hand. As soon as he was settled, the giant took off, easily walking through the giant threes, not minding the weight in his hand. They were as light as a feather to him.
The trio arrived at a camp no more than ten minutes later at the base of one of the giant mountains. Dorry set them down and walked over to the large fire. He pulled out a tree trunk sized skewer away to reveal a great chunk of roasted meat.
"There we go, this will satisfy you three. We don't got much for beverages, but we got a stream over-" Naruto did not need to be told twice before bounding off in the direction he pointed, and dunked his head into the stream. "Whoa, he must be really thirsty to do that."
"Gebabababababa!" Brogy gave off his own distinctive laugh. "Guess it's true what they say, you can take a fishman out of water, but you cannot take the water out of a fishman." He settled down near the fire and pulled out his own chunk of roasted meat and offered a part of it to them. "So, you three following those Straw Hat guys?"
"It's a long story." Bashura took the time to explain the situation while his Captain was re-hydrating. Taking a chunk of meat off with his hatchet and handing it to Igaram, and getting one for himself. "You see, my Cap'n does not like humans all that much. My personal guess he had a bad experience with them, but now that he's hanging around us, he's starting to like us or I at least like to think that."
"You don't say?" Dorry raised an eyebrow from underneath his helmet.
"Yep," The catman bit off a piece and popped it into his mouth. "Mmm delicious." He barely held back the urge to lie on the ground and chew on that piece of the meat like a cat. "Anyways, he's always acting reluctant in issues towards humans, but I know he likes our company inwardly. Even if it does seem like he's struggling with himself constantly."
"How are you sure about this?" Igaram asked.
"Animal instinct." Bashura grinned. (4)
"Ahhh, hot damn that hit the spot!" Naruto happily proclaimed as he removed his head from the stream, refreshed and renewed. Shaking his head, he went over to the group and tore off a chunk of roasted meat Dorry offered him with his hands and began devouring it. "Mmm, this is better than most fish I've eaten. What kind of meat is it?"
"Dinosaur!" Brogy laughed at the expression of Igaram's face. He looked absolutely horrified.
"I don't suppose you got any extra lying around, or possibly something that cures poison?" Naruto raised an eyebrow in question.
"If you can find a dinosaur then you're free to take it, we got plenty. But we got nothing like that, no plants other than trees, grass, and bushes grow on this island." Dorry explained before biting into his chunk of meat. "Sorry, pal."
"Damn," Naruto bit into his own chunk of meat. It didn't hurt to ask after all.
The trio spent two more hours there, learning that they were in the presence of "Dorry the Blue Ogre", and "Brogy the Red Ogre". Both who were infamous Captains of the Giant Warrior Pirates that accumulated one-hundred million Beli bounties during their terrifying reign. They would have conquered many of islands if not for them arguing over the two Sea Kings they killed that became the islands mountains.
When asked why, Brogy and Dorry revealed that everyone in Elbaf; the island they were from, heavily believed in honor. If there was any sort of dispute or argument between any giants, the God of Elbaf would decide which one would die and one would survive. It was a cruel existence as far as Igaram was concerned, but there was nothing he as an individual could do about it.
After eating their fill, the trio watched at the two pirate Captains duked it out with their fists. Apparently one of the many volcano's erupts every hour, on the hour, letting the two giants fight each other, and again they tied every single time. Soon after the second fight they received one of the Log Poses' that were recovered by Dorry and went on their way.
"I like those two, they're a bunch of knuckleheads, but they're good people." Naruto commented after they left the two giants.
"I agree." Bashura looked upon his new Log Pose, after trading in his old one so it could potentially help out another traveler in the future. "I hope they catch those guys who screwed with them."
"It could have been worse." Igaram said. "Apparently, those two asked for Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine to back them up. But they failed to show up thanks to...well you know."(5)
"They were smart to stay away." Naruto rolled his shoulder in response. "But you were a member, don't you know anything else about them?"
"All I know is that Mr. 0 is Crocodile, Mr. 2 Bon Clay is an Okama and works alone, and Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine being the weakest of the Officer Agents. I'm sorry that's all I know." Igaram said tiredly, almost like he was in shame for not having anymore information to give.
"Relax yourself, this'll be more than enough. At least we know enough that one works alone, eh?" Bashura patted the curly-haired man, and accidentally knocked him over. "Oops, sorry."
"It's all right." Igaram dusted himself off. "Ugh, I just wish that I would stop getting head wounds. I'll be lucky enough to not get my face scarred." He said, wiping the blood running from the side of his head.
A roar soon resounded throughout the area, making them freeze in their place. Bursting through the forest were three velociraptors and a tyrannosaurus rex charging at them. The trio didn't fight, no, instead they ran screaming. They ran for their lives towards the ship. They burst through the tall grass, jumped over logs and bushes, and Naruto cut through several trees along the way to try and slow them to no avail.
When they reached the beach where their ship was anchored did both Naruto's and Bashura's attitudes change. They both had grins on their faces, and the catman licked him lips in anticipation.
"Flying Hummingbird!" Reacting first, Bashura threw his harpoon with all his strength, the tip of the harpoon pierced the leading velociraptor in the chest. The velocity of the weapon lifted the dinosaur up and sent it sailing until it crashed into a rock, the haft of the weapon becoming buried into the torso.
He soon took up his tomahawk, and grabbed the second velociraptor by its long neck. He had to let go of his secondary weapon to clasp the offending clawed hand that tried to claw at him. The savage-looking navigator let out a loud war cry at the snapping maw of death and lifted the beast over his head.
The third velociraptor went at his exposed flank, and would have taken a chunk out of him if not for Igaram's quick actions. "Igarappappa!" Pulling his necktie strings the gun barrels hidden in the curls of his hair came out, and pulling the loops of his necktie he fired the explosive bullets. The six bullets hit the dinosaur's side, tearing through it like butter.
After killing the attacking beast, Igaram walked up to Bashura struggling with his own creature. He pulled out his borrowed pistol, aimed it at the velociraptor's head, and pulled the trigger. The beast let out a death wheeze and fell boneless in the cat man's clutches.
"Whew thank you." Bashura sighed out in relief before dropping the dead creature onto the sand.
"You should have told me that you were going to do this!" Igaram berated the larger man. "I was honestly scared for my life."
"It was a spur of the moment." He admitted, "Now I hope the Cap'n...oh my."
Igaram looked over just in time to witness Naruto cleaving through the tyrannosaurus rex's head with his anchor axe. The sharp blade tore through the beast's thick neck, his spine, and the fine meat they ate in a shower of gore that mostly landed away from the blond fishman, but a few specks got onto his outfit.
He landed on two feet easily, not looking back as the beast collapsed onto the sand with a loud thud. Naruto let out a breath he had been holding in before letting out a loud scream of victory. "Oh hell yea! Did you see that!? Take that Little Garden, Uzumaki Naruto is not afraid of you!"
"Well, looks like we're going to have a lot of meat for a few days." Bashura happily mused to himself.
(Meanwhile - On board the Nautilus)
"This is not good!" A male figure hissed on the inside of the ship, his eyes literally bugging out at the decapitation of the dinosaur.
"It's only three of them, and the two of us." A female voice said in a lazy fashion. "We managed to secure the other three."
"We caught them by surprise." The male said, patting a solid white casing that held a subdued Kotetsu, a blotch of dried white paint on his forehead. "And that fishman is their Captain, they say he's quite powerful."
"Only thanks the the nice lady for telling us." The girl indicated a trapped Carmen, a blotch of white paint, and pink paint on her cheeks.
"That will change soon enough, I defeated a pirate with a forty-two million bounty. I'm sure three more million won't matter in the slightest."
"I sure hope you're right, Mr. 3." The girl yawned out tiredly. Looking over at Kotetsu, she dipped her brush into her paint pallet, mixing them up until they were a black color.
"Hey, Carmen you ever cook dinosaur before!?" Naruto hollered once he got onto the deck of the Nautilus, the bodies of the velociraptors soon laying next to the mast thanks to Bashura. "Also, do we have enough room in the freezer for them?"
They received no answer.
"Uh, Carmen? Gin? Kotetsu!?" Naruto shouted out.
"Sorry Captain, we were just tending to Gin!" Kotetsu's voice rang out from the inside of the ship. "He took a turn for the worst, I think you should come in here."
Naruto narrowed his eyes. "All right, be right there!" He then looked over to the other two, "Prepare yourself, something's up."
"What makes you say that?" Igaram asked.
"Kotetsu does not call me Captain, unless he's being an asshole." The blond fishman took Saibannin Kayiouumi off his magnetized vest, and cracked his knuckles. Opening the door, he descended into the candle lit first hall of the ship.
Bashura volunteered to stay up, crouched in the crows nest for a surprise attack, and Igaram followed the blonde close behind with his borrowed pistol clutched in hand. The sound of wood creaking under their feet was not the best sound in the world at this point in time.
Kotetsu burst through the infirmity, both swords in hand. He had a look of shock and fear on his face, what looked like fresh black paint on his forehead, his body twitched as if he was trying to regain control, but failing. "Mirage Sword Style: Moon Wheel!" Running at them at a fast pace, Kotetsu began to twirl his swords like saw blades. They cut into the wood, tearing the walls apart, and ripping up floorboards.
"Fuck! Whirlpool Breakthrough Fist!" Naruto didn't have the time to build up any water around his right arm, instead he just punched out, and Kotetsu seeing the impending danger crossed his blades in front of his torso, and took the blow. The swords rattled in his hands, Nidai Kitetsu screamed in his mind as the blow launched him backwards, and upwards, tearing through the ceiling, and disappearing on top of the deck.
"Candle Lock!" Mr. 3's voice echoed from Naruto's side. The blond fishman watched as a block of wax exploded from the door of his bedroom. The wax hit his legs, forming a candle-shaped restraint that caused him to fall to his side.
"Gray – Color of Depression!" A girl's voice followed, and a hand shot out from the door across from his room. Igaram, sensing the danger from the technique took the hit with his left shoulder. As the paint brushed across his jacket sleeve, the man let out a depressed moan, and slumped to his knees. (6)
"I am a failure in life..." He pitifully moaned out, "I couldn't protect the princess, I couldn't save my country...I can't even satisfy my wife." It continued on like that, as he fell face first to the floor, too depressed to move a muscle or muster any energy.
"You missed, Miss Goldenweek." Mr. 3 scoffed in annoyance as he revealed himself to the bound fishman. He was an average-sized man with a rather frail-looking build. He had both three's visible on his dirty and tattered blue and white striped vest, the upper part of his glasses, and one big three achieved through his top knot on his nearly combed black hair. He dusted off his dirty white pants and kicked Naruto in the ribs with his blue and white shoes. "But we got him in the end."
"Indeed we did, Mr. 3." Said the girl. She had a child-like appearance, and was fairly short with blushed cheeks, and had her dark red hair tied in braided pigtails. Her attire consisted of a pink hat, a dark blue T-shirt with the word "Golden" written on it in orange, a sky blue shirt with a cloud pattern over it, a maroon-colored skirt, blue-striped stockings covering her legs, and big red shoes with white cuffs and white soles. Clasped in her hands was a paint brush and a paint pallet.
"So, you're the assholes who caused so much trouble on Little Garden." Naruto struggled to break his legs free, only to find it impossible, it felt like he was trying to bend a thousand iron bars between his legs. It didn't help when Mr. 3 used the same technique to lock up his arms.
"It's no use boy, my wax is as hard as steel. Not even your kind can break out of his." Mr. 3 smirked at his struggling. "Give it up, your crew is disabled. My partner turned your swordsman against you, and unlike my fight with the Straw Hats, I got some backup from the organization. You're finished!"
"Like hell I am!" Naruto gnashed his teeth together, he struggled violently against his restraints. "I've come too far to get captured by you..." He voice took a sudden low pitch that alarmed the two Baroque Works members. Naruto felt his muscles bulging, the adrenaline rushing through his body. He smirked cruelly as his eyes turned completely crimson.
With a roar that was as loud as a Sea Kings, Naruto snapped his arms outwards; completely shattering the restraints on his arms. The one's restraining his legs shattered a second later, and he burst upwards and delivered a fierce uppercut to Mr. 3's square jaw.
The candle man flew upwards, crashing through the top of the deck and hitting the mast. Mr. 3 groaned out painfully from his newly broken jaw, but managed to stand on his own two feet. Naruto followed him through the new hole in the ship, snarling in fury.
"Hey Cap'n, look what I found!" Bashura's voice snapped the blonde out of his newly found rage. Holding up in both his beefy hands were two animals. In his left one was a large vulture, with black feathers and white feathers, toward the neck. It had pink skin and a light yellow beak. It was also wearing a yellow aviator cap, with red flowers on it, and black goggles.
In his right one was a small otter, with brown fur as well as having white fur around the snout. It was wearing a light blue coat with purple dots that has long sleeves, and a hood, along with black sunglasses that covered its eyes.
"Can I eat them?" He asked, licking his lips hungrily, causing the two animals to squawk and struggle futilely in his hands.
"The Unluckies...Mr. 0 sent me the Unluckies as backup." Mr. 3's hair turned into an exclamation mark before drooping in front of his face in depression. "Bah, no matter!" His hair went right back up to its number three shape. "I can defeat you without backup, Miss Goldenweek!"
"That will be impossible," Kotetsu's voice made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Turning his head towards the entrance, he looked to see the black paint on his forehead wiped away from fresh blood dripping down the crown of his head, and his partner captured with his swords to her throat. "She's good at ambushing, but she is vulnerable fighting-wise if you know of her tricks. Bad move there you four-eyed bastard."
Again, Mr. 3's hair turned into an exclamation mark, and his eyes bugged out comically.
"What was it you said to me before?" Naruto cracked his knuckles, "Well, I'm saying it to you now. Give it up, your backup is disabled. My swordsman captured your partner, you're the one that's finished!"
"I will never lose! I've been in the Baroque Works for a long time, I've earned my rank and have taken down opponent's stronger than you!" Drawing upon his devil fruit powers, Mr. 3 covered himself in wax, creating a massive white battle suit that resembled a large robotic boxer. It had the number three on its face with a blazing flame shooting where its "eye" should have been. "Behold fishman, this is my Candle Champion, it's my strongest technique in my arsenal that I used to defeat a pirate with a forty-two million bounty on his head!"
"I am not impressed." Thrusting his arms out Naruto breathed outwards and manipulated the water from the sides of the ship. Narrowing his eyes he twisted the water, spinning it constantly in motion to the point where it was nothing but compactly pressured water spears. "Water Fang Bullet!" Thrusting his arms forward he launched his water attack at Mr. 3's armored body.
"Champ Fight: Plowing the Field!" Mr. 3 plowed forward, taking the brutal hits without a care in the world towards his opponent with his boxing gloves. He pulled his right arm back and punched forwards, and delivered a powerful punch to his midsection that would have caused some damage if he didn't catch it with both hands at the expense of being pushed back a few feet and tearing up the deck even further.
"That's it? Pathetic!" Pulling his arm back he punched the glove, sending kinetic force through the armored body, causing it to crack and shake. Seeing his opponent "bleeding" in a sense, Naruto went in for the kill. "Ripping Shark Jaw Palm!" He charged at Mr. 3 with incredible speed and opened the fingers of his right hand until they were spread wide and curved like shark teeth. The instant his fingers made contact with the armor.
Mr. 3 screamed in horror as his ultimate technique was torn away from him, he lost the arm of his armor and watched it fly into the ocean. His leg was broken away and he lost balance, it just got worse when he became as helpless as a turtle flipped onto its back. Naruto jut kept tearing his armor off with ruthless efficiency until he was left with nothing but his dirty, tattered, clothes.
"How...my ultimate technique...my beautiful piece of art...was defeated...how?" He asked in shock, his hair turning into a question mark.
"Because you fucked with the wrong guy." Naruto clenched his right fist, building up the water from the deck. It swirled around his right arm like a small twister. "And now, kiss your ass goodbye Whirlpool Breakthrough Fist!"
"I won't die like this! Candle Wall!" Crossing his arms across his chest, Mr. 3 produced a great amount of wax that cocooned his entire body in thick layers of wax. He completed the technique just in time to get punched by the shredding blades of water that cut into his shield. Eventually Naruto's punch won out and Mr. 3, still inside his cocoon was launched off the ship and flew far, far away into the ocean.
"Whew, glad that's over." Naruto sighed out as Mr. 3's body left his line of sight. He looked around his ship seeing the massive damage, and Miss Goldenweek who was staring blankly at him. "Oh God damn it."
"Orders, Cap'n?" Bashura asked.
"Strip them of anything that could help them escape, and tie them up. Throw them in the brig...or wherever you can store them. I'll...I'll go check on the others." Naruto brought a shaky hand into his pouch and pulled out a cigar. "And for God sake, don't eat them Bashura."
"Got it, Uzumaki. Come on you face painter you're coming with me." Kotetsu tore her art supplies away and tossed them onto the deck far away from her person.
"I'm not a face painter, I'm an artist." Miss Goldenweek tiredly protested.
"So you say. Move it." The swordsman nudged her with his saber.
"I'll get the rope, they'll not escape from me." Bashura let out a disappointed sigh. He honestly wondered what otter and vulture tasted like.
"What a pain in my ass." Naruto lit his cigar, greedily inhaling it. "Ahh...nerve calming." After several more puffs he went back into the ship, scowling at the extent of the damage created from the fight. This was why he didn't fight on ships, too destructive. Give him land or sea, anything but his ship.
"My ship?" He said to himself, stepping over a depressed Igaram. When the hell did he claim this old piece of crap as his? It had no electricity, smelled like wood half the time, everything was outdated by ten years, and yet when he saw the damage he felt outraged. "Huh, guess this is my ship."
Naruto arrived at the infirmary and saw Carmen bounded in white candle wax, two splotches of paint of her cheeks. And Gin, still bedridden and wrapped in some sort of wax rope. "Overkill much?" He asked rhetorically. Getting by Carmen's side he looked at her blank gaze, "Hey Carmen, can you hear me?"
No response was given.
"Carmen?" He lightly slapped her cheeks. "Hey, you deaf and dumb now?"
Again no response.
"Hmm..." Looking at the paint on her cheeks he licked his right thumb and rubbed it over the white paint, smearing, and cutting it in half with his saliva.
That got a response of her, "AHHH! Naruto what on earth did you do that for!? Wait, why am I encased in candle wax!?"
"I dunno, I was hoping you could tell me." Naruto shrugged in response before moving to free her.
(On board the Nautilus – Three Days Later)
"All right, I give up. Do any of you have any bright idea on what to do with these three?" Naruto asked the conscious miscreants of his ship.
"Well, we can't just keep them. Maybe we could turn them in for a cash bounty." Kotetsu suggested.
"That won't work," Igaram said, brushing the stitched up tear in his jacket. "The Marines have no knowledge of this organization, nor its members. If we turn them in, we would just be turned away, or in your case arrested for turning in 'innocent' civilians."
"Can't we just interrogate them?" Bashura asked. "That girl was partnered with the third highest ranked agent in the organization. Maybe she knows something?"
"That is a possibility." Carmen nodded in approval.
"Now hold on, we cannot just interrogate them." Igaram protested. "They may be Baroque Works members but they are still animals, and Miss Goldenweek is just a child. I cannot in good conscience allow this to happen."
"Relax, I was thinking the same thing." Naruto agreed, much to their surprise. "What? I'm all for fighting, if they die as a result then it's no skin off my bones. But torturing someone deliberately is completely unethical, and I will not partake in it. Ever."
"Relax Cap'n, it was only a suggestion." Bashura backed away from the growling fishman.
"How about we just wing it?" Carmen suggested. "They are securely tied up, and the worst they can do is not answer anything."
"All right, now we're getting somewhere." Naruto placed his hands in his pockets, and began walking to where they were keeping them. "Bashura, Igaram I'll need you two. Kotetsu, Carmen head up and continue the repairs. I don't want us sinking because a sudden storm popped up."
"Got it Captain," Carmen mock saluted, and grabbed the sandy-haired teen by the arm. "Come on sleepyhead, we got work to do."
"Yea, yea, I know." Kotetsu held in a yawn, not even protesting from her actions.
"You need to sleep."
"Ugh, tell me about it."
Back with Naruto and company, they entered the cargo hold of the ship. They were greeted by the bound forms of the two animals and Miss Goldenweek, it put a small swell in Naruto's chest, believing that they were the first to capture so many agents at one time. Not counting Whiskey Peak of course.
"All right you three, here's the deal. You're screwed, no ifs, ans or buts about it." Naruto bent his knees to get to their level. "If I were any other man, you three would be tortured until you told me everything I wanted to know, but lucky for you, I am not that sort of guy. So I'm going to make a deal with you."
That got the attention or the Unluckies. Miss Goldenweek, however, just continued to give him a blank, half-lidded stare.
"Tell me all you know about your group. The members, where they are located, and more importantly their powers. I want descriptions, names, ages, I do not care. Give me that...and I will let you go." The last sentence made Igaram gasp in surprise.
"Are you out of your mind?" He asked, gesturing their prisoners with his hands. "She's with the enemy, especially Mr. 3 who nearly captured our ship! And they ratted us and the Straw Hats out to Crocodile!"
"Really? Those two did that?" He pointed at the otter and vulture. "How?"
"Mr. 13," Igaram pointed at the otter, "Has a powerful memory, and an artist. He draws very descriptive pictures of targets and other enemies to the organization. And Miss Friday," He pointed at the vulture. "Is the one who flies him directly to Crocodile."
"All right, I get it." Naruto sighed out loudly. "But they will be traitors, more than likely those two will either run to Crocodile and give him pictures of us, or they will run for their lives. Either way they'll be off my ship. Bashura, take those two and get what you can out of them, Igaram and I will deal with...this one."
"As you wish, Cap'n." Bashura pulled the two animals up by the scruff of their necks, licking his lips hungrily as he left the room.
"Oh boy, I hope he doesn't eat them." Naruto sweat-dropped before turning towards Miss Goldenweek. "All right, Miss Goldenweek was it?"
He got a blank stare as his answer.
"The offer is still on the table, I would like to know about your organization."
Another blank stare.
"I know you're not mute, or dumb. You hit curly here with a paintbrush and he became a weeping mass of self-pity." Naruto thumbed over at Igaram.
"I resent that." The big man crossed his arms across his chest. "I couldn't control myself. That was the oddest devil fruit power I have ever seen."
Again, they were met with a blank stare. Which escalated into a ten minute staring contest between her and Naruto, blue eyes stared into black, neither blinking until it was the blonde fishman who fell backwards in defeat. There was nothing behind that stare of hers, complete and total nothingness. Not the dead inside nothingness, oh no. It was something that he never encountered in his life: Laziness, pure unadulterated laziness. It was something he never had the pleasure of doing, nor did he ever with to either.
"Igaram...please take over, I fear that I will not get a thing out of her." The blond fighter said, slowly getting to his feet. "God, it feels like I need to drink coffee, or some strong tea around her."
Naruto didn't see it, but Miss Goldenweek perked up hearing the word "tea". This prompted Igaram to gain a smile on his face, a plan formulating through his brain. "Why don't you check on Bashura, I believe I can handle her."
"If you say so." Naruto shrugged his shoulders and left the room wishing him the best of luck. He traveled through the lower level until he found Bashura, which wasn't very hard to do with his giant size. He smelled something, something...delicious.
"Oh no, Bashura you didn't..." He quickly ran, ready to berate or punch their navigator depending on the situation. Instead of seeing the savage-looking man biting meat off a drumstick, he was setting two bowls of Donburi in front of the two animals. The vulture was busy devouring her share while the otter was scratching down pictures, names and what looked like places. (7)
"Oh, hey Cap'n. You're just in time." Bashura greeted the fishman. "Mr. 13 is about finished with what you asked. They don't know their real names, but at least we know who they are and what their numbers are."
Picking up one of the many pieces of paper, Naruto looked at Mr. 6, a man with shoulder-length white hair that was held in place by a blue bandanna, green eyes, and a cruel vicious smirk on his face. It listed his proficiency with knives, wires, and a giant shuriken.
The sheet of paper that held his partner, Miss Mother's Day was a young woman with long brown-colored hair which was tired to form a ball on the top of her head, using what appeared to be a knitting-needle, while two large locks with darkened tips framed the remainder of her face pretty face. Despite her beauty however, she had a dark look in her brown eyes. Unlike her partner, it only showed that she was good with a sword. (8)
"Hmm, you know what. I am actually satisfied with this." Settling the papers down on the table he said, "After they are finished, tell Carmen to cook them up something to go."
"Aye, aye Cap'n." Bashura waved him goodbye as he went to check on Igaram.
"All right, what the actual fuck is this?" Naruto deadpanned when he got back into the cargo hold. He was expecting to see Igaram talking to their captive, pleading even, or some sort of asinine idea that would have made him shake his head. What he did not expect was the man sitting on the blanket with a teacup in his large hand, nor did he expect to see an extremely happy Miss Goldenweek spilling her guts out.
"Oh, hello Naruto." The curly-haired man greeted the fishman. "We were just finishing up our conversation. Would you care to join us?"
"No, I'm fine," Naruto blinked his eyes to make sure he was not hallucinating. He wasn't, dammit. "Igaram...how? How in the deep blue seas did you turn her from a lazy lump into..." He gestured to the violently shaking girl. "That?"
"Tea," Igaram simply said before taking a sip from his cup. "I saw her perk up when you said the word tea and knew what to do. I went up to the kitchen and boiled some water, poured in some honey, scooped in ten tablespoons of sugar, and a special ingredient that gives it its wonderful aroma. It's an Alabasta favorite."
"So, she told you about the Baroque Works organization over some tea?" Naruto sweat-dropped. It should not have been that easy.
"Extremely sweet tea, actually." Igaram took another sip, sighing in satisfaction at its taste. "In fact, she was just about to tell me how she managed to capture Carmen, and turned Kotetsu against you. Right?"
"Of course," Miss Goldenweek drank down the rest of her tea. "I use Color Traps, with this technique I developed myself I can hypnotize a person through the influence of colors and can alter a fight." She held out a shaking hand for more tea, something Igaram happily provided. "All I have to do is paint the symbol onto them directly or something they would stand on. Once they fall under my spell they are unable to break out of it unless it is removed or smeared."
"So that's how you did it." Naruto murmured, looking upon Igaram's torn sleeve that was also washed five times to get rid of the paint, and remembering Kotetsu's bleeding forehead. "So, it's not a devil fruit ability?"
"None, none at all." Miss Goldenweek guzzled down her tea. "However there is a weakness, if I try and Color Trap a strong mind it would prove difficult for me to control them, as opposed to that Straw Hat guy's simple mind."
"So Kotetsu, Carmen, and Igaram here had weak minds." Naruto murmured to himself.
"Not necessarily. They put up a struggle, but it was due to their mental exhaustion from what I'm guessing was that sick guy was I able to take control of them, and do what I wished of them." The girl said in a happy tone, from the sugar hopefully.
"I see..." Naruto rubbed the bridge of his nose tiredly. "I'll let you finish this up, do with her what you will. I'm going to take a nap or something." This was just getting too weird for him, he was gonna need to sleep on this information.
"Have a good rest Naruto, I believe we'll all handle it from here." Igaram waved the fishman goodbye as he went to sleep.
The next day Naruto awoke to a sudden chill in the air. "By the love of Poseidon! God damn it!" He clutched the blanket tightly around his body, gnashing his teeth together to prevent them from chattering. He breathed out to see a sudden mist escaping from his mouth, stunning him quite a bit.
"Kotetsu!" He yelled out upon exiting his room, fast and easy since he was still missing his door and ran up onto the deck. "Kotetsu, what is the meaning of...this?" He was greeted with white flakes littering a colorful deck, and Miss Goldenweek up in the crows nest fiddling with something with the rest of his hitchhikers looking upwards.
"All right, why is she still here?" Naruto asked.
"She never left." Kotetsu answered, his body bundled up in a blanket.
"Why is she jumping around like a hamster on coffee?"
"That is my fault." Igaram admitted, also bundled up in a blanket. "She drank three whole pots of my tea, and now she's on a sugar rush like none I have ever seen before."
Naruto observed Miss Goldenweek fiddling with some rope, and looked upon the deck seeing a cartoon version of himself with a bloated body, a rainbow, a sun with a smiley face, rain clouds, and a highly detailed treasure chest filled with gold and other goodies. "And why is the deck is scribbled in graffiti?"
"Well apparently last night she decided that she hated the red and black color of the ship. So she decided to change the depressing colors for something much more...happy." Carmen answered him, tightening a thick blanket over her body.
"And none of you tried to stop her?"
"I did," Bashura stepped up to reveal his tattooed face was completely panted white, and he took on the appearance of a panda, and the only one without a damn blanket. "This was the result, and none of them wanted to get painted like me."
"And where are the Unluckies?"
"They left after you went to sleep." Bashura shrugged, "Took their meal and flew away."
"One last question, now that I see most of you have blankets on. So, what the hell is going on? Why is it so cold?" Naruto asked through clattering teeth.
"We're nearing Drum Island, Cap'n." Bashura answered, futilely wiping at the paint on his face. "It's supposed to be an island covered in pure white snow with drum shaped mountains."
A sudden cold wind blew at them, causing Naruto to violently shiver. On the plus side, it blew away the fog that was obstructing the view of the the island to reveal it being bright pink in place of snow. "That don't look like white snow to me." He dully remarked.
"Hey Sharp-teeth!" Naruto looked up to see Miss Goldenweek hanging upside down, and waving at him excitedly, or was it her being high on sugar? He could not even remotely tell. "Look what I made!" She sprung up on along the edges and began running around along it, looking like a miniature tornado due to the high amounts of energy she was exerting.
Looking further up, Naruto's eyes widened in response. Flying from the top of the mast was a black flag. Pictured on it was his face; his skull to be precise, and his dorsal fin showing as well, with his infamous shark-like grin with two white bones crossed underneath the jaw. In the background was a blue spiral symbol that resembled a whirlpool with shark teeth on the inside of the of the lines of the whirlpool.
Miss Goldenweek made a flag, a Jolly Roger in his likeness.
"Fuck my life." Naruto palmed his forehead.
"Cheer up Sharp-teeth." Miss Goldenweek suddenly appeared in front of him. "Turn that frown upside down, or you will have a permanent scowl!" Before Naruto could do anything, he felt something wet upon his face, and ten seconds later his entire face was painted yellow, his eyes and mouth painted black. Carmen, Bashura, Kotetsu, and Igaram took one look at him and burst out laughing.
"I hate you guys, so...so much." Naruto hung his head, futilely hiding the painted on smiley face.
Armageddon: Well here is another chapter folks! Their pirate flag is up, Miss Goldenweek has joined up for now, and they are on their way to get Gin fixed up because I am getting real tired of making one of my favorite characters acting like a pussy.
Pvt. Leafninja: I think we all will be happy about that.
Lt. RasenganFin: Mhmm so what are you going to call yourself now that you're a pirate?
Armageddon: I am not calling myself anything other than Cutlass Black! And it will stay that way until I capture Liquor and my deserters!
Pvt. Shadowninja/DemonShifter: Hell yea, and about damn time we appeared!
Armageddon:...Yea, sorry about that. It's hard to keep track nowadays. But anyways folks, I'm on a roll now so expect more from me, from this and my other stories. And for those anonymous reviewers quit asking me questions! How the hell can I answer anything if you do not have an account. Folks, I will not answer anything unless it's an actual account on here. Thank you, good night. And remember, no less than five words. I want details people!
(1) If you know what that is from, the you Sir, or Madam are awesome
(2) It actually does translate to Sailor in the Greek language, and is a kind of mollusk. Naruto's just being stubborn as always.
(3) Okay, you have to admit Dorry and Brogy have been on that island for one-hundred years. Many pirates and sailors more than likely arrived at the place before and after them, and were more than likely killed or run off like it was said in the manga. Wouldn't it make sense for them to collect as many Log Pose's as they could so they can get travelers off the island faster? I know that's what I would do if I was a friendly giant.
(4) Animals react to people based on their emotions and personalities. I mean, they fondly react to good people, and react horribly to bad people...at least that's what my dog did when I was a kid. So, Bashura being a giant cat likes Naruto despite him giving them the cold shoulder because he sees something the others do not.
(5) Mr. 5 had the shit beaten out of him. I firmly believe that he and Miss Valentine would not be able to come due to his injuries, and being to damn scared of a psychotic fishman showing up and getting them. Seriously, they may be in the top five for the Officer Agents, but they still lost to both Zoro and Luffy while they were fighting each other!
(6) All right, I'm gonna level with you. Miss Goldenweek's Color Traps impressed me after reading the manga again, but she only had seven attacks, so Agurra and I came up with different colors for different effects. Continue reading and you'll see what they do.
(7) This was in Miss Goldenweek's "Operation: Meet Baroque Works" mini-series. Those two were captured by the Marines and bribed with hot bowl of donburi. And I'm not one to torture animals, even in stories like this. So, I stole the idea and used it in this. I believe it was all for the better.
(8) If you know who these guys are, then good for you.