Thanks to AusHunIsForever777 and SansTheLanguage218 for reviewing.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.

Belmano: Memories

Bella sat down, a large book in her arms. It was a book that her boyfriend, Lovino, had written. It wasn't a published book or anything. It was more like… a journal, or a memory album. She wanted to see what he had written.

She turned to the first page, noticing the date, and started reading.

Today I asked Bella out. I was sure that she would reject me, but to my surprise, she said 'yes'. I'm going to take her out to the movies tomorrow. Some sad and sappy romance movie. Girls like that, right? I hope she knows how much I'm willing to suffer for her.

Bella giggled. She remembered that night. The movie had a twist at the ending, when it was revealed that the guy was dying of an illness and that, instead of letting it get him down, he decided to live life to the fullest. Lovino had bawled at the end of it, and it was when Bella decided that she would give dating Lovino a chance. Initially, she had agreed because she wanted to see how it would be, but when she saw that he was actually pretty sweet, she wanted to see more of it. And eventually, she fell in love with him.

She turned to the next entry, smiling when she saw it.

So… I took Bella to the zoo. She really liked it. And then we ate at a restaurant. It felt like a cheesy scene from a Disney movie. You know… the spaghetti… And then we ordered waffles for desert. She really likes those.

When they were at the restaurant, they shared a plate of spaghetti. And their forks did grab hold of the same strand. Bella was the one that pointed out the similarity to Lady and the Tramp, and Lovino had grown redder than the pasta sauce.

There were many pages of Lovino recounting their dates in his usual way. It was rather sad that he tried to hide his feelings, even in a journal. Then again, he might have been intending to give this to her from the beginning, in which case, it was so typical of him that she had to smile.

The last page, however, contained something that she wished had never been written. And it was all because she had been so blind.

Dear Bella, if you're reading this, you must probably hate me. I've probably done a shitty thing, but… I just couldn't stand it anymore. I know what people say. That you're only dating me because you pity me. That if you see someone better, you'd leave me. And I know they're right. I'm not worth your time. So I wanted to leave this book with you. At least then, you'd know that I actually cared about you.

Also… I know what you're going to say. That I'm a coward. That I'm weak. That I could have fought it, but… I wanted to die on my own terms, you know? I also didn't want you to have to spend however long with me because you're… you're too kind. You would have stuck with me until the end, and I didn't want that. I didn't want to see you suffer because of me. I didn't want you to think that you had to stay with me. You didn't deserve this.

I'm sorry. I love you, and always will. Please, be happy.

Tears welled up in her eyes. Of course, she knew that Lovino suffered from a bit of an inferiority complex – having been belittled all his life by his parents and bullied at school. But she didn't think that it was this bad. And it was only after reading this note for the first time that she found out that he had been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and didn't have long to live. And ironically, it was his heart. He committed suicide so that he wouldn't have to die of the cancer.

She should have seen the signs, but she had been so blind. She didn't notice that Lovino was trying so hard on their dates, and smiling more often when he was with her. She didn't notice.

It had been a few years now, and every year on the anniversary of his death, she would read through their memories. She wanted to hold onto the happy times, knowing that she would never have another one with him again.

The prompt is: 'Imagine person A of your OTP going through a memory album that person B wrote, detailing experiences the two go through. Person A is reliving the memories, until they get to the last part, where person B's suicide note is laminated and paper clipped in.' I decided to make the note the last page of the book. Makes it more effective when she goes through it the first time and see the note.

I'll admit that I was fighting the tears while writing the suicide note, and the part after that.