Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!
"Napoyto?"
"Naruto... why in the world is he calling you Napoyto?" Atalanta corrected the leader of the Red Faction as he INSTANTLY picked up on who Naruto was just by seeing him. "Your name is Naruto..." Atalanta tilted her head slightly.
"Apparently, my legend needs... updating, because I'm a lesbian named Napoyto who had sex with her mother, and is Greece's greatest female." Naruto deadpanned with a twitching eye of his own. He was not happy about how wildly incorrect his own legend was about him.
"Well, I am the Master of Assassin, and the unofficial leader of the Red Faction... as for how I knew your identity... your whisker marks and closeness to Atalanta gave it away." Shirou had heard the tales of the greek hero Napoyto even when he was a child.
The beautiful Greek with the face of a fox.
"Well, I'm on your side now... Do you mind if I just... go now, since fights can only happen at night, I want to spend the day with my mom." Naruto had... well not a lot of catching up to do, but he simply wanted to spend time with his mother. Shirou smiled pleasantly at him, while his servant stared at Naruto with a harsh look.
Untrusting.
"... and how do we know you really switched sides."
"Assassin, I'm sure he is telling the truth... and since we lost Berserker, replacing him with an Archer is a good deal."
"Also, if I wanted to kill you all, it wouldn't be that hard. There isn't a need to do things like backstabbing you, when I'm pretty sure only that guy can match me." Naruto looked over at the tall pale man, who was watching Naruto silently, but it was a strong silence. He didn't seem like he was on guard, but Naruto could sense a powerful divinity in him, no less than his own. Meaning that this was a servant in the war who could match him on equal footing in a fight.
"You arrogant."
"It isn't arrogance, just a fact. I could take out the entire Black Faction by myself, and likely more than half of the Red Faction, all at the same time. Now that I'm with my mother, I don't even need a wish on the Holy Grail... this war means nothing to me." Naruto stated as he held something invisible.
It was invisible, but when he tossed it into the air, it became visible.
A golden apple.
"Ah!" Atalanta realized slowly as she realized that the Golden Apple could give immortality, and do things similar to what a Holy Grail could do. She grabbed her own Golden Apple, the same Golden Apple as Naruto, and summoned it to her side.
A pair of the same apple.
"Do explain?" Shirou asked with a pleasant, polite tone.
"I can't eat this apple myself, but I can give it to one person of my choice. Whoever eats this apple will become immortal. This is my 5th Noble Phantasm... The Act of Giving Life to Another." Naruto showed that he couldn't eat his own immortality granting apple. He tried to bite into it, but his teeth phased through it like it wasn't there. It was a Noble Phantasm that had no uses in battle, was purely support, and he couldn't use on himself at all.
Atalanta looked at the apple in her hands.
"This is one of my Noble Phantasms... The Immortality I Refused... I own this apple, but I will never use it on myself..." Atalanta slowly realized why Naruto didn't have a wish for the grail anymore. Naruto tossed the apple in his hand towards her, and she caught it. She looked at his apple, before she handed him her apple.
They traded apples.
"You see, my wish is simple... I wish my mother a second chance. I was going to use the Holy Grail's wish to summon her, and give her a chance at life... but here she is." Naruto mentioned as he gestured to Atalanta.
Achilles entered the church.
Silently.
"... My Wish was to live together with my son again, so I was going to use the Holy Grail to summon him, and incarnate us both..." Atalanta looked at Naruto's apple in her hands with a wide smile. She took a very large bite of the delicious apple, and it's juices dripped off her chin. She munched and munched on the apple, until not even the core remained, only the stem.
Naruto took 3 large bites and finished the apple that Atalanta gave him off.
There was a shimmer.
Both of their bodies shimmered.
"... you're both still servants." Shirou noted, since he could still sense them as servants.
"No, we're Half-Servants now. The apple... well... it didn't fully incarnate us, but I expected that. Half-Servant... Demi-Servant... Pseudo-Servant... we're something." Naruto still felt his servant body, but it seemed to be layered with a flesh and blood body again. It wasn't perfect, and it meant that he couldn't achieve a spirit form anymore.
Atalanta was silent.
...
"Okay, so we still need the grail. We're still going to fight on this side." Atalanta slowly realized that it wasn't going to be as easy as eating the apples to incarnate. The apple just allowed for a half-assed incarnation, while keeping them bound as servants.
Naruto sighed.
"Well... I was hoping that would work, and we could just abandon this silly war... but I guess we're in it for the long haul. Do I need to prove myself to you, or are you just going to accept me on your side?" Naruto asked with a sorry grin. In all honesty, if his apple idea had worked all the way, he would have just fucked off to the forests in Greece with his mother, and never involved himself with the Holy Grail war again.
He didn't enjoy fighting for the sake of fighting like some heroes.
He enjoyed a good fight, but he would rather enjoy a peaceful life hunting than spilling the blood of others on the ground.
"You don't need to do anything... but if you could reveal the names of your fellow Black Servants, I would appreciate it." Shirou offered a hand to Naruto.
Naruto didn't take it, instead he grabbed the man's forearm and shook that.
"Saber: Siegfried. Lancer: Vlad the Third. Rider: Astolfo. Caster: Avicebron. Berserker: Frankenstein's monster." Naruto stated.
"... and assassin?" Shirou asked.
Naruto shrugged.
"I never met Assassin, and I never saw them around the castle. I mean, it isn't like I've seen 7 servants here either... where is Saber and Caster at?" Naruto looked around to prove a point. The knowledge that he gave should prove useful, even if he didn't know who assassin was. He just gave them the true names of the other 5 servants, which meant he gave them the weaknesses of those 5 servants and a game plan of how to beat them if need be.
"Ooooooh, no wonder you were so confident you could beat them all." Achilles realized when he ran the names through his head.
Not a single one of those servants could damage Naruto, so it was an actual unfair fight.
As far as he knew, the only 3 servants who COULD damage Naruto at all in the war were himself, Assassin from his side, and Lancer from his side. They were the only 3 in the war who could inflict any damage at all to Naruto, and only Lancer could do so without Naruto's immortality protecting him to some degree.
"Also, they have Spartacus now." Shirou noted.
Naruto made eye contact with Lancer.
'She hasn't taken her eyes off of him.' Achilles noticed that Atalanta just kept gazing at his face. She refused to take her eyes off of Naruto, and the smile that he rarely saw on her face was just plastered there, and refused to leave.
"Well, I think that is good enough proof that you're on our side... but is your master on our side?" Shirou asked.
"My Master is dead, I killed her myself. Now that I ate my Mom's apple-"
"You ate more than her apple-guh." Achilles got mule kicked in the stomach for making that comment. It was a double mule kick, one leg from both mother and son. "... oh come on, you two are... Shirou, you're human, what is some slang for incest?" Achilles asked the only master he had seen since the war started.
"Kissing Cousins... a Mother and Son Wombo Combo?" Shirou offered helpfully.
Atalanta turned red.
"I only did that to help Naruto with his tasks! I did it to save his life!"
"... Mom... even I have to call that out as a lie. When Circe molested me as a child-"
"Rape, she raped you, and I had sex with you so that you would have fond memories of sex, and not perverted memories of what that witch did!" Atalanta argued with red cheeks. Sure, she had sex with her son when he was a young boy, but she did it for a good reason.
"How about when I was 12."
"Ares raped ME, and I was in a bad place, so of course I wanted to feel close to somebody who I trusted. You can't expect me to accept being raped and NOT want to take back my body." Atalanta looked at the surrounding servants, who were giving her some of the most judgemental stares. Achilles was enjoying himself.
Naruto was smiling.
"Yeah, sure, but the gods raped a lot of people. It should have been good enough for you when I shot an arrow and nailed his balls to his asshole. It's okay... it isn't like you had sex with me when I was 13." Naruto teased his mother.
She covered her face.
"That wasn't my fault! Aphrodite was jealous of how beautiful your face was, and she cursed me to lust after you with a heat that wouldn't go away. Also, sex feels good, and I already broke my oath at that point... you're teasing me." Atalanta went pale faced in annoyance when she finally realized that Naruto was just teasing her.
Achilles had to speak up.
"... Even I didn't know about that... when did Aphrodite curse you?" Achilles hadn't heard that part.
"Aphrodite stumbled across me bathing in a river with Poseidon and Apollo. The three of them competed with each other to gain my affection." Naruto started to tell the story.
Shirou sat down and listened in interest.
"Makes sense." Achilles agreed.
"Well, Apollo granted me a Wooden Shield that would protect me from all impurities. Poseidon gave me a blessing, that made it so I can't drown. Finally, Aphrodite offered me eternal youth, a body that would never reach old age." Naruto explained some of his divine gifts.
"Go on."
"Mom, in a fit of anger, wrapped the Calydonian hide around by body and asked the gods to leave. Apollo and Poseidon accepted, and left, but let me keep their gifts. Aphrodite... angry at being rejected, cursed Mom..." Naruto started to explain.
Atalanta yelped.
"... Whenever the moon is darkened, I am cursed to yearn for my son sexually. Whenever I don't have Lady Artemis' grace protecting me, I lust after my son with such an intense heat, that I can't stop myself." Atalanta admitted with a slight sense of shame. She had been cursed to forever yearn for her son on the nights of the new moon. On the nights when Artemis couldn't protect her from her own lust.
"Ooooooooh... so that's why nobody could ever find you during the new moon!" Achilles remembered that she disappeared during those times, and nobody could find her.
"... I'm not talking about this."
"Okay, so that explains why she had sex with you... but why did you do it with her?" Shirou was so interested in this.
Naruto crossed his arms and smiled proudly.
"I have the most beautiful, amazing, wonderful mom in the world! I love her more than anyone, so if she wants to do stuff like that, I will never refuse her!" Naruto seemed very proud of that.
Atalanta was just humiliated, covering her face with her hands.
"So... let me get this straight. Circe raped you, and her solution was sex with you. Ares raped her, and her solution was sex with you."
"Not to mention the time Aphrodite took my Mom's form to seduce me, and to make sure I was never tricked by Aphrodite again, Mom had sex with me to teach me more about her body." Naruto proudly and loudly proclained his own flawed judgement for everyone to hear.
...
"Geez, and here I thought Oedipus had it bad for his mom. The two of you..." Achilles was about to call the mother and son duo dumb, but he remembered that Naruto had outsmarted Athena in a wits battle.
Atalanta was kind of dumb.
Naruto was just a total and utter momma's boy.
'So... if I want to control him... I can use her to manipulate him.' Assassin looked at Atalanta with a glint to her eye.
"Also, I think I should state this. I shot a god in the balls and ass for hurting my mom, I think if somebody tried to use my mom against me, I would give her some nipple piercing with my arrows." Naruto pointed out as he looked over towards Assassin.
She blushed and looked away.
'How did he know... can he read minds?'
"No, I can't read minds, but I saw how you looked at me and mom, and was able to put two and two together. I'm happy to work with you all for now, but only an idiot would target my mom." Naruto practically read her mind, and he stared at her with unblinking eyes.
Lancer stepped up and got ready for a fight.
...
"I'm not going to fight anyone, it's still the daytime, and servants can't fight during the day." Naruto deadpanned.
"Very well... and you are sure that you can defeat all the Servants of Black if given the chance?" Shirou wanted to confirm that.
"Yes, it will be time consuming, because they are all heroes and warriors, but they can't hurt me. The most they could do is stall me out until morning, but most of them will die trying." Naruto wasn't going to just say that it would be a 5 minute fight. It would be hours long, because they could always work together and given him trouble. The second it turned into a war of stamina, he was going to win.
Still, he would win.
Chapter End!
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