okay last episode of the day then it's all Saturdays ok
Chris: last time on total drama Pahkitew island the teens ran a super slippery race while holding some very rare pork Ella sang again and Jasmine won it for the Luminous Lions and while team Observation Octopuses had to say later to Leonard the Larper today's challenge is treacherous deadly and unless you're doing it hilarious who will survive to play another day and who will be sent home by a giant cannon airlines find out right here right now on total drama Pahkitew island!
(intro)
Jasmine: you know don't have to help me every morning just because Amy tells you to
Sammy: you don't want me to come?
Jasmine: that's not what I said I just want it to be your decision not her's stop letting your sister treat you like a servant
Sammy: ohhhh she never treats me that well
Jasmine: then do something about it
Sammy: how can I she's everyone's favorite she's the pretty one
Jasmine: you're identical twins you're both the pretty one
Sammy: really?
Jasmine: Sammy look the first person who stands up for you has gotta be you
Sammy: wow so are we like friends? If not that's okay I don't have a lot of friends so I'm I'm not I just
Jasmine: the way Amy treats you bothers me so yeah I guess we're friends and I have trouble making friends I don't why but *punches tree* people find me a bit intimidating
*TIMBER*
(confessional)
Sammy: maybe I have been letting Amy get away with too much one time I let her shave my head so that people could "tell us apart" Jasmine's right I gotta stand up for myself
(ends)
Shawn: hey
Jasmine: good day Shawn
*stares a lot*
Sammy: um I'm going over there
Jasmine: so Shawn any zombies sighted in the area
(confessional)
Shawn: usually when I talk to a girl I'm the one who has to bring up the undead looks like survival skills and a healthy fear of reanimated corpses man this girl has everything!
(ends)
Shawn: no zombies sighting yet but they can walk underwater so they could be on this island right now
Jasmine: definitely they could be anywhere
Shawn:...I better get this food back to the others I'll see you around?
Jasmine: I'll be here
Sammy: uh were you talking about Zombies?
Jasmine: he he yeah it's just a little running joke between us
*meanwhile*
Shawn: hey who's hungry
Sugar: YEEEEEE *PUSHES* HAW I can eat the legs off the table and we ain't even got one
Ella: oh Shawn as a special thank you I'd like to sing you a little song the fruit Shawn brought brought joy to the-
Sugar: eat up Ella you look skinny enough to run through a rainstorm without getting wet
Sky: I got fresh water from the stream don't want to get dehydrated during the challenge
Dave: awesome so great you areso-
Ella: the water Sky brought brought joy to the world-
Dave: thank you but no song required
Shawn: Ella maybe you could go sing to the other team as a sign of a friendly competition
Ella: that is a wonderful Idea *leaves*
Dave: so Sky as I was saying-
Sky: nice one Shawn
*meanwhile*
Rodney: look at all this stuff thanks Jasmine...thanks Amy
Sammy: Amy? it was ME not Amy
Amy: ugh what is your problem Samey?
Sammy: I'm tired of you taking credit for things that I do
Topher: and Samey is on the attack
BF: BEEP?
Jasmine: Sammy? this might not be the right time
Sammy: I'm the nice one Amy *stands* IS A MONSTER!
Amy: *gasp* how could you say that *weeps* I'm you're sister WAHHHHHHH
BF: *holds Amy* BEEP?!
Max: jealousy is the lowest form of evil!
Rodney: Samey what is wrong with you
Sammy: I I I RRRGH *leaves*
Topher: and after laying down some brutal blows Samey heads off will team Luminous lions be able to get past this stay tune to find out
*Amy smirks*
Ella: good morning other team who'd like to hear a song
Chris: NO ONE ELLA it's challenge time all butts tom the meeting area in five
Topher: I'M COMING CHRIS
Jasmine: I'm gonna go and check up on Sammy *places hand on Rodney's hand*
*bruh*
*meanwhile*
Topher: Chris totally pumped for today's challenge
Chris: oh good I can't tell you how little that means to me
Topher: you think I could explain the challenge to the others
Chris: whoa whoa whoa that's kind of the host job Topher
Topher: right right I'm sorry I'm just excited it's like we're already winners because we got to meet Chris the Chris Mclean wow
Chris: well said Topher
(confessional)
Sugar: that Topher is as wildly as a hog with a library card I wouldn't trust him any further than I could throw a tractor and that ain't more than a couple of feet
(ends)
Chris: gather around victims today's challenge game is called DOOM BALLOONS
Max: you had me at DOOM
Topher: shh go ahead Chris
Chris: you have ten seconds to collect a bunch of balloons that are filled with who knows what talc paint itching powder bees spiders bird poop it's always a surprise
Ella: yeah who doesn't love a surprise
Chris: none of you NONE of you will love a surprise
Topher: *chuckles* Chris I love the way you'd
*WHISTLE*
Chris: if you're hit with any Balloon contents you're out it doesn't matter if the balloons are thrown dropped launched kicked or sent by courier last player standing wins it for their team *whistle* get your balloons people!
*grabs it*
Chris: the hunting doesn't start until you hear the airhorn
(confessional)
Topher: me and Chris are pretty tight I wouldn't be surprised if he asked me to co-host or something I mean
*AIRHORN*
Topher: OH GOTTA GO
(ends)
Max: *pushes rock* surely there must be something I could build with these pieces something deadly and evil
(confessional)
Max: I've hidden bits and pieces of pure evil all over this wretched island...my evil laugh is a work in progress no matter I shall win this challenge because of my abnormally large brain and my super advanced hearing no one has ever been able to sneak up on me
(ends)
*poke*
Max: AHHHHHH
Scarlett: what are you doing Max
Max: it's very technical you wouldn't understand
Scarlett: ok
Max: wait! fine is you must know I'm gonna take everything I have together into one long stick then put my balloons on the end thereby allowing me to hit people with said balloons from a safe distance
Scarlett: wow that's so evil
Max: yes thank you for-
Scarlett: it's too bad there isn't a way to launch something sharp you know to pop their own balloons onto them
Max: *lightbulb* I've got an even better idea yes I'll build a rapid fire balloon busting device that fires projectiles and pops their balloons before they can throw them
Scarlett: wow your mind is SOO powerful
(confessional)
Max: Scarlett is hopelessly in love with me but I must remain focused on my work evil doesn't date first I will control this island then this hemisphere then the world HAHAHAHA *gasp* there it is that was an evil laugh
(ends)
Sky: huh
Dave: NOOO
Sky: oh it's you
Dave: hey Sky I was thinking maybe we could team up you know watch each other's back
(cofessional)
Sky: Dave's a nice guy and he is cute but I have to keep my head in the game I can't let myself be distracted by his eyes or that hair or his smile uh what was I talking about oh right no distractions
(ends)
Sky: I think I'll go it alone it's nothing personal Dave it's just easier to be silent when you're by yourself
Dave: are you saying you find talking to me just too tempting?
Sky: he umm if that's how you want to interpret it okay
(confessional)
Dave: okay it's not like I'm falling for her I mean sure yes she's really cute and totally awesome at anything and everything and she has those deep eyes that silky hair and...what was I saying oh right yeah I'm falling for her
(ends)
Dave: going it alone might work sometimes but I feel-
Sky: shh
Max: HAHAHAH
Sky: TAKE COVER!
*SHOOTS DARTS*
*POP POP POP*
Sky: *GASP* BEESSSSSSSS
Dave: SKY WAIT UP
Max: it worked! *LAUGHS* you should be taking notes of my genius
Sugar: *sneaks*
Snakes: HISSSSSSSS
Rodney: ah ha sorry Sugar should have hidden better
*SNAKE FACE*
Rodney: huh
Sugar: *PULLS* thanks for washing my face hefty worm I feel cleaner than a sink made of soap NOW BEAT IT *throws snake*
Rodney: AHHHHHHHHHH
(confessional)
Rodney: you can't throw snakes at people unless the snakes are in a balloon then it's okay
(ends)
BF: *looks around* BEEP?
Sky:*remove stings*
Dave: Sky yikes man they really got you good
*angry*
Dave: oh sorry but hey it could have been a lot worse AHHHH
Sky with back on stings: you think?
Dave: wowzers sorry I got you knocked out of the game Sky and I'm sorry all the bees went after you I mean I'm glad but
Sky: YOU'RE GLAD
Dave: because I'm allergic to bee stings and tomatoes wheat and peanuts flowers mountain lions dander and most fruit flavored gums
Sky: seriously
Dave: well I've never been tested for any of it but I've always suspected it's better to err on the side of caution when dealing-
Sky: Dave you have to warn the others that the other team is using our own balloons against us we've lost two challenges already we need to win this one Dave
Dave: you got it Sky I am on it *EGGED*
BF: YEAH
Dave: are you serious?
BF: BOP BAP BUP BEEP
Sky: hey don't be rude about that
BF: BEEP *runs*
(confessional)
BF: BEEP BAP BOP BOP BUP BIP BOP BAP BIP BOP BOP (dave has got something to do with his love thing)
(ends)
Chris: hehehe
Topher: hey Chris
Chris: Topher you're the middle of a challenge dude
Topher: I know but it's important you got to call in the makeup department to do something about those crow's feet
Chris: Crow's feet?
Topher: yeah it looks like they were wearing cleats what if kids start twerting about how old you look and the network decides to replace you with a younger host
Chris; replace...me? *GASP* MAKEUP!
*Jasmine is walking*
Shawn: even with all the branches and twigs on the ground she moves so silently wow
(confessional)
Shawn: look I don't want to like her 73.6of all men who die in zombie movies died because the girl they love becomes a zombie and when it comes time to cut her head off they get all sentimental about it and they hesitate when there aren't zombies on your tail man thinking is the last thing you want to do
(ends)
Ella: hello beautiful butterfly you're so delicate you should hide until our game is done
Sugar: RAHHHHHHH oh it's you
Ella: look Sugar just because my balloon is made to do harm doesn't mean that it can't look adorable and constantly delighted to be here
(confessional)
Sugar: man oh whoa that girl could bug off a stink off a donkey
(ends)
Ella: oh Sugar I just know we're going to be the best of friends
Sugar: I heard something *push* DUCK!
Ella: *muffled* Sugar? Sugar! I've fallen into this poor bush
*meanwhile*
Floyd: huff huff WOAH this tree has eyes!
Shawn: whoa it's me Shawn I camouflage myself with mud and moss I knew all my cake decorating skills will come in handy someday he he
(confessional)
Shawn: bakers have been hiding in plain sight covered in icing camouflage like since the dawn of time at least that's what my old boss at the bakery used to tell me mind you he also said the pyramids were built by pastry chefs so
(ends)
*STRETCH SLING SHOT*
Max: rest assured that as long as you're with me you are safe
*SLIME AND POWDER*
Max: REVENGE! ACHOO
Floyd: nice shot
*meanwhile*
Rodney: I have to find just the right words to end my relationship with Amy so she isn't left shattered like...a cabbage in a cabbage shatterer thingy DAH come on words I need you
Amy: way to make a total fool of yourself in front of everybody Samey oh I got the food and I'm the nice one blah blah blah!
Rodney: voice of an angel (dummy)
Sammy: sooner or later Amy everyone will know what you're about
Amy: uh huh
Rodney: good after noon Samey May I have a moment with Amy please
Sammy: Rodney you can have ALL of the moments with Amy *walks*
*cries*
Amy: are you crying?
Rodney: Amy I don't know how to tell you this so I'm just gonna say it I but true love gold beast mountain top UGH what I'm trying to say is a lot of cabbage and hill GAH *cries*
Amy: *yawns and walks away*
Rodney: I just *pink stuff* I deserved that WAHHHHHHHH
*meanwhile*
Topher: wow good makeup job dude you look 20 years younger it's like you're 30 again
Chris: I am 30
Topher: oh um yeah I know and now you look it but you could use some moisturizer *SPIDERS*
Chris: thank you
Topher: AHH SPIDERS IN MY HAIR SPIDERS IN MY HAIR
*meanwhile*
Sugar: hmm *throws balloon*
BF: *KETCHUP* BEEP!
Ella: oh sorry it was just a game
BF: BEEP BOP...BEEP BOP BAP BAP...BAP BOOP BOP BEEP BIP
Ella: oh you wanted me to sing while I was at your team well now that we're here smiles can help with trials and tribulations
Sugar: CHRIS SHE'S SINGING AGAIN
*RELISHED MUSTARDED AND [REDACTED]*
Jasmine swinging: ha ha might want to keep quiet next time girls
Sugar: OH MADE ON A MUSKRAT
Chris: did I hear singing again? did I?
Sugar: yeah on account of her sing song she got us hit with balloons full of mustard relish and *licks* some third thing I can't Identify
BF: BEEP BOP
Ella: if my song was the cause of that then I-
Chris: okay as long as the singing caused you pain Ella I'm happy
BF: *sigh*
*meanwhile*
Floyd: ok move steadily because you have no more balloons and *twig snap* oh no
Amy: hello *miss* *miss*
Sammy: *hit*
Floyd: *ITCHING POWDER* What the...*SCRATCHES*
(confessional)
Floyd: itching powder really I'm pretty sure I'm allergic to this
Chris: everyone is allergic to it it's itching powder
(ends)
Floyd: I GIVE UP!
Jasmine: well done Sammy you took out Dave
Amy: whoa loud cough of interruption *push* I was the one who took Dave out not Samey
Jasmine: I can tell you apart and Sammy's shot was just excellent
(confessional)
Amy: okay since when does anyone take Samey's side? she's just a wanna be me a spare Amy *GASPS* her name should be SPARE-MY I am change her birth certificate as soon as we get home
(ends)
Jasmine: since Sammy is the only one with a balloon left we should stick together I spotted Shawn's hiding spot earlier follow me
*later*
Shawn: ok I'm the last man standing for my team I don't want to disappoint them
Jasmine: he's right below us
Sammy: you take the shot Jasmine I don't to mess it up
Amy: and she would
Jasmine: you can do this Sammy I know you can drop it right down on him
Amy: give me that you'll miss
Jasmine: Amy stop messing about
Amy: IT'S MINE
Sammy: NO LET GO
*PINK PAINT*
Jasmine: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Chris: GAME OVER team Octopus wins the challenge
Amy: UGH WAY TO GO SAMEY YOU RUINED EVERYTHING I'M TELLING
(confessional)
Jasmine: well good thing for Sammy they weren't born siamese twins or I reckon Amy would have eaten her by now
(other)
Sammy: whenever I have something Amy wants she just takes it always always always *CRIES* what am I gonna do now?
(ends)
Chris: tonight's winners get to enjoy dinner from Mary's lamb burger that's Mary's Lamb burger and barbeque emporium Mary had a little lamb he he had
Chef: heheh
(confessional)
Floyd: where is he getting these food?
(ends)
Sammy: *cries*
?: wow tough one today Sammy
Sammy: *sniff* uh who's there
Scarlett: don't worry I'm here Scarlett what's wrong?
Sammy: I just know I definitely gonna be gone no one believes me
Scarlett: hey can I tell you something
Sammy: what?
Scarlett: I believe in you but you played it pretty terrible
Sammy: I know...wait you believe in me?
Scarlett: look Amy is a really jerk all the times make you go foraging blaming you for the loss and changing your name
Sammy: I know I hate it what can I do
Scarlett: Actions speak louder than words Sammy I can help you out *whispers* I made a fake robot version of you to keep you here
Sammy: huh what's that gonna do
Scarlett:...do you want to take revenge *moves hand out* on your sister after all the times she put you through and send the fake version of you into the cannon
Sammy: yes *shakes hand* if it doesn't mean Jasmine's gonna leave soon
Scarlett: you got yourself a deal then a great one
*later*
Chris: welcome to your first elimination of your team the rules are simple walk to that table of there and write the name of the person you want to sent home
!voting!
Amy: enjoy being cannon fathered SPARE-MY *holds Sammy's Name* ha ha ha so funny
BF: BEEP BOP BAP *holds Scarlett's name*
Jasmine: oh I wish there was a second chance for her...
!ends!
Chris: well let's get started to read this stuff first vote Samey...second vote Amy...Third vote Scarlett?
Scarlett: huh who voted me?
Amy: strange...
Chris: *Tosses marshmallows* 4th vote Samey 5th vote Amy and the sister eading home is
Chris: Samey!
Amy: buh bye hahaha
Jasmine: you better watch yourself in the next challenge
Chris: any final words
Chris: uh ok...no words at all?
*BOOM*
Chris not even a scream? boring! well 13 players remain but only one goes home with amillion dollars find out who lasts and who blasts on the next total drama pahkitew island
*extra*
Tammy: I can't believe we got out back to back!
Leonard: look it's Amy or Samey
*CRASHES INTO BITS*
Leonard: uhhhhh
Tammy: did someone turn into a robot?
well that was just the beginning of the worse that will happen see you Saturday