[A note from the author: Happy Independence Day to my American readers. Go do as Elida would do; enjoy your temporarily legalized pyromania! (chapter posted on July 4th, 2024)
Content Warning: Violence and Torture. A TLDR will be provided at the end of the chapter for anyone wanting to skip the violence but continue the story.]
Alastor hit the man again, and again, and again, the shovel smacking hard against his victim's body. He began to laugh. A manic, crazed cackle that got wilder and more terrifying with every swing. The party guests nearest to the mausoleum entrance saw him and gasped, recoiling at the show of violence. Elida pushed past them, confused and a little disappointed that their dance had been so unceremoniously interrupted.
First thing was first; she needed him to calm down. "Allie," she called out. He didn't hear her. She tried again, a little louder, "Allie." Still no response. She walked up and placed a peaceful hand on his shoulder, "Alastor."
He stopped, turning to look at her, a wild smile on his face and a twitch in his eye.
"How did you do that?" she asked. Not why; how.
"What do you mean, love?" his chipper conversational tone returned quickly, and he leaned on his shovel. It was pressed into the living and now badly beaten man's back.
She circled him curiously, looking him over; "How are you still here?" She stepped casually over the man groaning in pain at their feet, "And how are you so," she poked his chest, "corporeal. You shouldn't have been able to do that kind of damage to someone on the living plane. He can't even see our jack-o-lanterns, let alone touch anything."
"Well," he replied, "To answer your latter question simply, you are not the only talented magic-wielder here, dear." His crazy eyes flashed an insidious red glow, penetrating through the darkness before returning to normal again. Elida felt an inappropriately timed twinge in her groin at the subtle but powerful display. Sometimes it was easy to forget just how strong he was.
"As for the former, I have broken no rules," he shrugged cheekily.
She raised an eyebrow, glancing at the guy on the ground. He tried to get up. Alastor held him pinned. "How do you figure that?" she asked.
Alastor gestured dramatically to Elida's left. She looked toward where he'd indicated and saw a small figure in a fairy princess costume tied up and gagged. A pink pillowcase full of candy sat beside her. She struggled with the ropes around her tiny wrists, eyes streaming with tears and a snot bubble in her nose.
"The spell allows violence in cases of defense," Alastor reminded Elida. "I think perhaps that little girl may be in need of a guardian angel, wouldn't you say? Why don't you go care for her, and I'll handle this pathetic scum." He lifted the shovel and brought it down again, earning a cry of pain from the man. The kidnapper had started it, and now Alastor had free reign to finish it.
Elida gasped, rushing to the little girl's side, "Oh, you poor baby!" She strengthened her own magic, allowing herself to be revealed to the little girl. She took the gag off first and summoned a handkerchief to wipe the child's nose clean. "It's okay, sweetheart, I'm here. You're safe, now. We're going to take care of you." She soothed the child's tears with gentle words and a hug, removing the bonds from her wrists.
"The bad man promised me a giant chocolate bar," the little girl sobbed, "he said he had a bowl of candy in his car for me! He's a liar and a mean man! I want to go home!"
"There, there, sweet girl, I'm here. The mean man can't hurt you anymore. We'll take care of it." Elida held the little girl to her chest, petting her hair and sending a quiet spell of comfort into her mind. She calmed down a bit. Her wrists were red and raw.
"Why bring her here?" Alastor thought aloud, examining their surroundings.
Elida knew why. "After the silent costume parade, the no one in this town visits the cemetery until morning. It's the perfect place for privacy, if you don't believe in ghosts." She continued petting the little girl's hair.
The fairy princess's shaky voice sniffled, "Who's that guy?" she pointed at Alastor.
"Let's just say he's Trick," Elida said, thinking quickly, "And I'm Treat." She didn't want this girl to know their real names. Elida was too well known in town, and Alastor was sure to have mountains of true-crime articles written about him. She didn't want to traumatize the poor thing any further than she already was.
"Oh." The little girl thought about that. It seemed to make sense to her. She looked up at Treat and asked, "Is Trick going to hurt me, too?"
"Oh ho, heavens, no," Trick waved his hand sassily, "I don't harm children. And Treat here would never allow it."
"Is he your boyfriend?" She asked Treat.
"Not technically," Treat laughed, patting the girl on the head. "Why do you ask? Do you have a boyfriend?" She needed to get the girl to talk about something. It would help get her mind off the terror of what had happened and help her feel more comfortable.
"Mommy says I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend until I'm older, so I got a girlfriend instead," she stated bluntly, as children often do. "Her name is Andrea, and she gives me candy from the secret treasure chest in her room. One time, she…"
Alastor didn't know what to think about Elida's response, so while the little girl was distracted, he just did what he did best: he dragged an injured man away into the darkness, humming pleasantly to himself. He was going to have fun with this one. He gave Elida a clever wink before disappearing from sight.
When the man's senses began to return, and he started to struggle in Alastor's grip, Alastor knelt down and picked him up by the neck. It would have been an impossible feat of strength in his living years, but the Radio Demon was no normal human. The man's feet kicked and dangled beneath him, his arms struggling to pry Alastor's fingers off. Alastor ignored it.
"So," Alastor asked cordially, "What is your name, buddy boy?"
"Hey, let go of me, you sus prick!"
"I asked you a question," he said, squeezing tighter.
The man's head pounded. His vision blurred, and everything was spinning. This was not the fun night of action he'd envisioned. In an attempt to get the mysterious figure to loosen his grip a bit, he relented, "My name's Eddie." he tried to cough, but his attacker's grip was too tight.
"I'm Alastor, pleasure to meet you, quite a pleasure. Well, then, Edward," Alastor said, setting Eddie's feet on the ground, but retaining his grip around their throat, "I'm going to give you a choice. You can either die here, or you can live a little longer and die later anyway. Whadd'ya say?"
"It's Edgar, not Edward, Assho-"
Alastor squeezed again, "What was that you said, Edward, old pal?"
Eddie's eyes felt like they were going to pop out of his skull. With no small amount of effort, he squeaked out, "Edward is fine."
"Good. So, what'll it be, Edward?"
"Live," he said weakly, struggling to breathe, "I want to live."
Alastor's eyes glowed red, and his smile grew from cheerful to sinister. "I was hoping you'd say that."
"Wha-?"
In one fluid motion, Alastor slammed Eddie's face into the ground and pinned him down. Pulling a rope from his utility belt, Alastor bound Eddie's hands and feet behind his back like the pig he was. Eddie tried to scream, but the soft cemetery dirt muffled his voice like a pillow. In response, Alastor flipped him over, shoved a rag in his mouth, and held it there with his hand. Eddie struggled to breath through his bleeding and rapidly swelling nose. Blood and mucus ran down his throat and he gagged in disgust, unable to spit it out.
"As much as I would love to hear your cries of pain," Alastor said happily, "I'm afraid it would disturb the other guests haunting these grounds tonight. I don't think my dear Elida would appreciate that very much, as it could… what do the kids say, nowadays? Insult the vibe check?"
The kids absolutely did not say that these days, but Eddie was too terrified and too well gagged to correct him. He just nodded frantically, hoping to assuage his attacker somehow.
"Brilliant," Alastor chirped, "See, I can be hip with the times. Now, to deal with the issue of your screams. Back in my day, I had a vast swamp to swallow all sorts of sounds. But now and again I had to take alternative measures. Unfortunately for you," he said, pulling something small out of the same hidden pouch the rope had been in, "duct tape hadn't been invented yet, and I like to keep my tools compact."
He produced a needle and thread, "Don't you worry, Edward my friend, it's nice and sharp."
Eddie saw the needle and his eyes widened in understanding. There was no way. This guy was insane. He was actually insane. Eddie writhed and struggled, but the bonds on his ankles and wrists were too tight. He was helpless. He couldn't even beg for mercy.
"Shush now," Alastor said condescendingly, "It will hurt more if you struggle." He threaded the needle, "Actually, on second thought, do struggle, that will make this far more fun!" Alastor sliced a cut along both of Eddie's lips so that they would seal themselves together as they healed, making it more difficult to reopen them without a permanent scar to remind the scum of what he'd tried to do.
Eddie felt the needle pierce into his lips, the thread pulling through his flesh like a parasite. Alastor hummed a cheerful tune as, stitch after stitch, Eddie's mouth was sewn shut, the rag still shoved firmly inside. He tried to scream. He bucked, he thrashed, he cried, but Alastor simply continued on, a big creepy smile on his face.
"You know, Edward," Alastor said conversationally as he finished the last few bloody stitches, "I'm quite cross with you. You see, you came along right as I was going to tell the love of my afterlife about my affection for her. You ruined a rather lovely moment with my little doe." He tied a knot in the thread, and silent tears trailed down Eddie's face. "I don't appreciate that. I very well may have had my first kiss, and you know how the stories all say how delightful those can be. It's funny," Alastor leaned back on his heels, examining his handiwork, "I never really cared about that until now."
"So," he asked, "which bones should we break first?"
On the other side of the graveyard, Elida kissed the little girl's wrists, healing the angry red rope burns just enough to stop the pain, but not enough to erase the evidence of what had happened. She wanted to escort the poor thing home in person, but she didn't know where this girl lived. And there was that trouble with the assassin to contend with; It wasn't safe for Elida to go running off until they'd been found, and it was possible that anyone found alone with her could get caught in the crossfire. She couldn't risk this girl's life like that. So, Elida settled on a blessing instead, casting a spell of protection and guidance on the girl's spirit.
"You run along home, now, sweetheart," Elida said softly, "I promise you'll make it back safe and sound. You can eat your candy and get a good night's sleep. Don't forget to tell your mom and dad what happened, okay? Show them the ouchies on your hands."
"Okay. I'll tell Mommy and Daddy that Trick and Treat are real! And they won't believe me; but I'll know it's true; and I'll bring you candy every year forever." The little girl, feeling much better, took two lollipops from her pillowcase and dropped them into one of the sacrifice bowls before running off into the dark. She didn't look back. When she got home, her parents had hot soup and a bath waiting for her.
Elida went to go find Alastor. She had planned to follow the sound of screams, or maybe manic laughter, but there were none. Instead, she heard Alastor's voice singing a strange song. It floated through the night, piercing the air in a clear and haunting tune;
.
"Oh, to be a flower in the spring,
It would be such a lovely thing.
I'd stretch and grow up towards the sun.
Aw, what fun!
.
But down in Hell I yet reside,
Because like the rest I've long since died.
So, my bones feed the flowers instead.
Alas, what dread!
.
My bones feed the flowers,
My bones feed the flowers,
Each spring they devour,
And up they go.
A cheerful bloom,
Upon my tomb,
What a beautiful thing to know!
.
Their roots feast on my rotting corpse,
And I've become a delectable course.
Oh, to feed a flower in the spring,
A lovely thing!"
.
It was autumn, not spring. But either way, Elida smiled, finding her darling Alastor leaning over the kidnapper and cutting open their shirt with a pair of scissors. She watched from behind an obelisk, wondering what he'd do without her there. When the hog-tied man's shirt was fully removed and the dark purple bruises on his ribs were fully exposed, Alastor took the same knife he'd used to carve the pumpkin out of its sheath. He examined it, fingering the edge.
She had something else he could finger if he wanted.
Oh, for the love of God, she had to stop thinking these things at such inappropriate times. He saw her as a close friend, and that was all he was. She'd be content with it. She had her own toys to relieve tension in the night if she needed. But damn, it would be a lie if she said she wasn't going to imagine him just like he was now during her special adult time. He didn't have to know.
"Well then, Edward, old pal," Alastor said, finishing his song, "As I've agreed to let you live, I'll have to leave a little something for law enforcement to find, so they can know what you were up to. Do feel free to try to scream; it may tear the stitches, and I'll get to put a whole new set in! Wouldn't that be fun?"
Alastor pressed the tip of his knife to Eddie's skin, just to the left of his naval. He'd carve diagonally, just to make sure there was enough room for the full message. Slicing carefully, he etched out a letter, and peeled the skin off, popping it into his mouth before etching the next one.
Eddie writhed again; the pain of his skin being peeled off piece by piece making him regret every life choice he'd ever made. When he saw Alastor eating him, bile rose up in his throat. He tried to shove it down, but the vomit came anyway, filling what little space was left in his stitched mouth. Some of it erupted out of his nose. He choked and sputtered, nostrils burning. The rest of the vomit had nowhere to go, and he was forced to swallow it again.
He wished he'd taken this man's offer to kill him when he'd had the chance.
Elida walked up behind Alastor, and for a moment, the man thought he would be saved. She could call the police; she could jump this psycho from behind and knock him out; she could save him!
Only, she didn't. Instead, she sat down beside the smiling monster, licking a lollipop. She'd brought one for him, too.
"Here," she said as casually as if it were just another Tuesday, "That little girl left us an offering." She held the other lollipop out. Alastor took it and thanked her with a friendly pinch on the cheek.
Fuck. He had an accomplice. Eddie was doomed. He sobbed pathetically behind the blood-and-vomit-soaked rag.
Elida examined Alastor's morbid artwork. Behind the blood and gore, the word "PEDOPHILE" was carved cleanly into the man's torso. She thought it was appropriate to the situation; like a gruesome jack-o-lantern. All that was missing was the flames.
"I think we should set him on fire," Elida mused, rather un-angelically.
Her violent words made Alastor glad it was too dark for her to see the fresh bulge under his trousers she'd caused. Sweet mercy, she was something else. "I'm afraid we can't do that, love," he declined. "You see, I offered him the choice to live or die, and he decided he'd rather live. I'm afraid I've given my word, darling." He batted his eyes at her, mocking the man on the ground.
He was suddenly very glad this man's mouth was sewn shut; the last thing Alastor needed was some stranger telling Elida about how he'd wanted to kiss her. Serial killers often had a habit of confessing intimate thoughts to their victims, and Alastor was no different. At least, not when that victim was sure to be unable to repeat what they heard.
"Well, that's that then," Elida conceded, "I couldn't ask you to break a promise. What will you do with him?" She licked the lollipop, and Alastor's gaze followed it to her lips. Ahhh, those lips…
"I thought a nice hangman's tree could be lovely. Somewhere he'd be easily found next time someone visits the graveyard." Alastor stood up, lifting Eddie by the ropes on his shattered limbs like some kind of crying suitcase. "Perhaps over there?" He pointed to the Speed Dating booth, which now sat empty. The tree there had a nice protruding branch, perfect for a child's swing, or a treehouse, or a sobbing lump of human scum.
"That should work," Elida agreed, walking beside Alastor as he carried the evil man. "What's this?"
She looked down to find two rose quartz boxes at the base of the tree. One had the initials "A.H." engraved between a pair of flaming antlers, and the other had "E.M." inside the circle of a halo. They sat on top of a note that read, "For Alastor and Elida. Love, Cruci."
"Aww, how sweet and incredibly presumptuous of her," Elida said, examining the little boxes. She held them up side-by-side and snickered, "Hey, Alastor."
He paused from securing the rest of his rope to the branch of the tree and looked over at the two initialed boxes, "Yes, dear?"
Elida arranged them just right. "AHEM," she said like she was clearing her throat.
He stared at her for a quick beat, then cracked up laughing. "HAHAHA! Good one, love!"
Eddie whimpered in pain.
"Hush," Alastor said, kicking his cracked ribs casually. He leaned down, attaching the end of the tree rope to Eddie's bindings. He pulled at the other end, hoisting his victim up into the air. With his injuries, it would be a miracle if he didn't end up permanently disabled after this.
Eddie hung there limply, miserable and wishing for death. His shoulders popped out of place with the strain, the skin on his wrists and ankles burned, and his snapped limbs stretched unnaturally, but he couldn't do anything but hang there. Alastor secured the rope in place, then added insult to injury by giving Eddie a little push. He swung back and forth, making him feel even more nauseous than he already had.
While Eddie whined and sobbed, Alastor offered Elida his hand, "I believe we were in the middle of a dance, darling." They could still hear the music drifting out of the mausoleum, even from far off, though it was quieter and more muffled.
"We were," she confirmed, sticking the quartz boxes into her pocket and accepting his hand. She kept her eyes locked on his, just like he'd taught her to do. She found it wasn't so difficult anymore.
He pulled her into position, and they waltzed, slowly twirling around each other beneath the October stars. The moon was high, and it was getting late. The spell keeping them there could break any minute. Alastor had to do it now, or he'd never find the courage.
"Elida," he began, speaking so softly it was almost a whisper, "I have something I've been meaning to confess."
She tilted her head, "Confess? Are you okay? Did something happen?"
He smiled affectionately at her concern, "Yes, dear. And I fear you may be rather upset with me."
"Why is that?" she asked, a little worried at what he could possibly shock her by after everything she'd seen and learned.
"Before I tell you," He warned, "I wish for you to know that I'm not requesting anything from you. I simply will not be able to rest until I've cleared this from my mind. Ask it of me, and I'll never say another word about it. I know this is an issue that frustrates you often."
"What issue? Allie, you're scaring me…"
She almost pulled back, but he soothed her, "No, love, you have nothing to be frightened of. I simply-," he took a deep breath, steeling his nerves, "I wish to tell you that I…" He tried to coerce the words to cooperate, "It seems I've found myself-"
Damn it, why was this so hard? Words were his whole thing; he shouldn't be struggling with them this much. He took another breath, pausing their dance and looking deeply into her eyes.
Finally, he forced it out, "Elida, I'm in love with you."
[TLDR: Alastor stops a pedophile who'd kidnapped a child while she was trick-or-treating. Elida sends the child safely home while Alastor tortures the pedophile; he is not sent home from the haunting spell due to it being an act of defense for the child. Alastor confesses that he's in love with Elida. Elida has not yet responded to the news.]