AN: I wrote this months back maybe in April and forgot about it lol. Takes place in season 3 when Buck's healing after the ladder truck fell on him. I am over moon for Buddie/Tevan and Bummie (Buck Tommy Eddie) Plus Tevan/Rockie which is Rocker/Eddie. I thought I'd post another Buddie since been a while. I wish could have Bummie. S.W.A.T. did a Poly relationship once. Too bad ABC can't. Don't come for me. I can love all it's my head.
Summary: Buck's having horrible muscle spasms in his leg as he recovers. Eddie's helping him and they talk.
Title: Muscle Spasms and Love Confessions
Buck was trying not to make a sound. The pain was almost as bad as when he'd been trapped under the ladder truck. His therapist had said now that he was using his leg again, he might get muscle spasms. He had over done it, but he needed to get back to work. He was going stir crazy doing nothing. He'd barely been at his loft after that first week on crutches. Ally had ditched him that first week not able to deal with being with him because of the job. It sucked, but he'd dealt with it. It had been what it had been. Though he was sure that Eddie wanted to strangle her. She'd left after a brutal nightmare he'd had. She'd given him his phone and left, with a sorry I can't do this anymore. He'd been panicking at the time because he'd dreamed that he was dead.
Now though he was in pain because of the muscle spasm, and it was two in the morning. He didn't want to bother anyone, but after another moment he couldn't stop himself from letting out a scream. The back of his calf was tightening even more before it would unclench. Tighten then unclench over and over. He'd kept his self from yelling out for only the first two rounds. He rolled towards the wall screaming into the mattress. He wanted to get up, but Eddie was on the other side of him. The wall was blocking the other escape and he couldn't bend his leg from the agony to crawl to the foot of the bed.
He felt the tears pouring out of his eyes, but he didn't care. It hurt so bad that he was crying. He wanted it to stop, it had to stop, but the first ones he'd had after the first therapist session had gone on for almost an hour. Eddie had helped him move and even though he liked mustard to a point, eating spoons of it had gagged him. Eddie had made him drink water and take one of the pills he hadn't even known Eddie had filled for him.
The therapist had warned him about them and the doctor had given him the prescription for muscle relaxers. He hadn't wanted them, thought he could tough it out. That had not been happening. He'd finally fallen asleep after the spasm had stopped and he hadn't woken up until morning. He wanted one of the pills now, but he didn't want to be a bother. He knew Eddie was exhausted from a rough shift. He didn't want him to have to take care of him tonight too. The next spasm had him letting out another sob because it felt like a knife in his calf that was twisting.
~BE EB BE~
Eddie opened his eyes looking towards the door thinking that was where he'd heard the sound come from. After another second, he realized it hadn't been Christopher, but Buck. He sat up shoving the covers back before rolling Buck towards him. He knew what the problem was and once he had Buck feeling better, he'd give him a lecture about not waking him up again. He had told him it didn't matter how tired he was, he was there for him.
"I got you take hold of my neck." Eddie said knowing that he could easily lift Buck up. It was the easiest way to get him to the edge of the bed without him having to bend his leg.
"Sorry I woke you up." Buck said, but he took hold of Eddie's neck feeling his best friend's arms going around him. He'd joked about it the first time Eddie had lifted him up, but he wasn't in the mood for joking right now.
"I don't care about that." Eddie said as he helped Buck stand feeling his best friend put most of his weight against him.
"Fuck, hurts." Buck said burying his face against Eddie's neck trying not to wake Christopher up. He didn't want to scare him right now. He was still dealing with losing his mom. He couldn't be the cause of bad dreams too.
"I know, just lean on me and I got you. Small steps at a time, we'll walk the room." Eddie said tightening his grip on Buck as they started walking.
Eddie knew how bad spasm could be, he'd had plenty of them in the past. His own recovery after he'd been discharged from the military. There were even some these days if he worked himself too hard. He'd had one or two at work before and Buck had been the one helping him. It wasn't like they could take anything then to knock them out since they were on shift. He kept talking to Buck reminding him to breathe because wasn't sure for a moment if Buck had been taking in air. He'd heard him take in a breath, but hadn't heard him let it out. He didn't want him to have a panic attack on top of the muscle spasm. Or accidently pass out because he forgot to let the air out.
"It's easing off." Buck said after fifteen minutes of them slowly walking the room. "If it stops I don't want a pill. It's after two it's too late take one, they knock me out for four or more hours." He said taking in a breath.
He wasn't sure if he'd remember to even breathe if Eddie hadn't been reminding him at the start of it. He knew it would also leave him groggy and unbalanced for half the day. It was a low dose pill, but it still knocked him out as if it was five times the dose. He felt slight relief and Eddie helped him on the bed again. The moment he laid back though the spasm started right back with vengeance. The muscle tightened down like his leg was being crushed all over. He bit down on his bottom lip so hard he tasted blood letting out a muffled scream.
He tried rolling over to shout into the mattress, but he was being helped back on his feet. He didn't want to walk, he wanted to lay there and just die. It had to end eventually, it had to. He didn't realize he'd even said that part out loud until he heard the tone in Eddie's voice. The words shocked him too because the way they came out it didn't seem like it was a platonic way. The pain had to be messing with his head though.
"I'm not letting you die; it hurts like hell I know, but you are not dying on me, on us." Eddie said. "One foot in front of the other, if you must yell then feel free. Never, ever, say you wish you would die again. I will beat it into your head if I have to. I already lost Shannon I'm not losing the only other person I love besides Christopher." He said giving Buck the best sideways glare he could while trying to keep him walking. "Do you understand me, Evan?"
Buck swallowed nodding his head because Eddie rarely ever called him by his first name. Twice was all he could remember his best friend doing it. Both of those times had been in the last six weeks. All three had been when he'd said something stupid about dying. They kept walking around the room until the spasm stopped for a good five minutes. He didn't object when Eddie handed him one of the pills either for the muscle spasms or a pain pill because he was in agony. He laid on the bed on his side feeling Eddie's arms wrap around him.
The last six weeks this was how they had ended up when Eddie wasn't on shift. Between the nightmares and now the muscle spasms it had helped. He hadn't felt weird for a second about it which probably should have made him a little worried, but it felt right so he hadn't stopped it. He felt like he was whole when he was wrapped in Eddie's arms. His best friend's head against his neck feeling Eddie's breath on his face.
"I'm sorry, Eddie. I'm not leaving you or Chris." Buck said. He felt Eddie's hold tighten on him and he relaxed into it. "I love you both too." He said before he drifted off.
~EB BE BE EB~
The alarm going off had Eddie groaning as he reached over hitting it to turn it off. He then rolled back towards Buck. He let out a sigh because he wasn't sure if Buck even got what he'd been meaning. He'd heard Buck say he loved him, but he wasn't sure if it was friendship love or the way he'd been feeling about his best friend for months. It's why he didn't start anything up again with Shannon even though she'd wanted to.
He'd planned on telling her the truth, but she'd said it first. She'd out right asked him if he was sleeping with Buck. He hadn't been, but he couldn't lie when she'd said he was in love with him. She'd told him to tell him, he'd planned on it. Then Shannon had been hit by the car and then the ladder truck had been blown up. He'd almost lost Buck on top of Shannon. More than once he'd had the nightmares that Buck had died. He'd talked to Bobby more than once on a night he'd woken up and found his friend and Captain up too.
"I don't know why I can't just tell you." Eddie said to his self. "I love you, Buck. I wish I could say it to you when you're awake. I can't lose you too. You mean so much to me. I don't even know when I fell in love, but I did."
It had hurt when Shannon had died because she'd been his first love. It hadn't hurt as bad as he thought it would though. He'd asked Bobby why; it wasn't like he had never loved her. He'd gotten some of the wisdom he was use to coming from Bobby. He would always love Shannon and Buck hadn't replaced her, but it was a different kind of love. One that he found not seeing it coming. He hadn't been wrong because he hadn't seen it at first. He hadn't set out to fall in love with his best friend. However, he had and watching Buck almost die had hit him like a ton of bricks. He was completely in love with him. At the time of course he couldn't do anything and now he was scared Buck wouldn't feel the same way. He couldn't risk losing Buck.
"You just did." Buck said in sleep laced voice. "You're not alone. I love you too." He said when he rolled over facing Eddie. He saw the deer in the head lights look on his best friend's face. "You're the one that needs to remember to breathe right now. I'm not going to run away in a panic. One I can't run right now and two, there's nowhere I want to run to. If you hadn't noticed I've been in this bed instead of on my couch for over a month." He smiled moving his hand up to Eddie's face. "I could have refused to stay here and been uncomfortable on that couch. I just didn't want to be when I had this. Whatever we have."
Outside of Maddie he hadn't had a best friend before Eddie. He didn't think guy best friends shared a bed most nights. He didn't think they slept holding onto each other either, but he wasn't complaining one bit about this. He told Eddie that because he might as well tell him the truth too since he'd just gotten it.
"You definitely can't run away right now. I think Chris could even bet you right now walking." Eddie said moving so he was leaning is head against Buck's. It got a laugh from Buck and he felt it too. "I thought you might panic and leave. Didn't even know it was more than friend's love until Shannon called me on it." Eddie said not wanting to move.
"Maddie did the same to me." Buck said. "You were the one there when I woke up. Carla was there too, but you were in the chair on the other side of my bed." He sighed. "Though Maddie said it months ago when I was talking about you and Chris. She said I had a boy crush. I might have said cute to her, but was trying not to let her see the truth."
Eddie knocked anyone out of his sight of vision when it came to wanting to be with someone. Abby didn't even come close to what he felt for Eddie. Ally had kind of been the one that made him see it though. She'd left him and he'd panicked, but he'd called Eddie. It was the first person he could think of. It had been like no one else existed at times when he was here.
Buck moved closer until they were only a centimeter apart, but Eddie pulled him the rest of the way without hesitation. Their mouths colliding and giving into what they both had wanted for a while. It was slow and full of heat at the same time. It ended way too soon, but after a second, they were kissing again. Air was what they broke for the second time both of them panting.
"If we didn't have to get up I'd stay right here with you." Eddie groaned because it wasn't fair.
"It's not like we have anything to do today. It's Saturday and there is no school. Chris will sleep in for another hour or so." Buck said with a smile. "No therapy today and you don't have to work until tomorrow."
Eddie grabbed hold of the cover pulling it up over their heads before going back to what he'd finally gotten to do, kissing Buck. When they were ready he was going to do more than kiss him, but for now this would be fine with him. He didn't have to hide away his feelings anymore.
~THE END~
EN: I get horrible muscle spasms because right now I'm stuck in wheelchair again and will be for while longer. I try do stretches and stuff but that causes them in my stomach and my leg if keep it down too long or use the other one too much while going through the house. I took the pain from my level. It's horrible and before I was given pills it would go on for 45 minutes to an hour even eating mustard and drinking water. If you can't walk it's even worse especially if have go to the bathroom without someone to help you. In this I got Buck having Eddie though and of course I had to give some Buddie love.