Sharing our beloved DylanLovesBrenda's lovely anecdote from a review of the last chapter:
I have a cute story about Love Letters, I met Shannen back in 2008 I believe, I met her mom too. She was there by her side as she signed autographs and such. Her line was the longest of course. She was gracious, sweet, humbled and loved the things I brought for her to sign which was a 8X10 black and white picture of brenda and dylan at the spring dance, an entertainment weekly cover with her and jennie on it, a shirt that said I slept with dylan first, and a script, the best episode of all time in my opinion isn't it romantic? Yes the dylan and Brenda get together episode. She looked through it and asked how I got it. Honestly she said I could talk to you all day but of course because of her line she could not. Her mother said shannen and Luke were suppose to do Love Letters on stage together but their schedules didn't match up and it fell through. So not only was love letters important for BD it was also important to shannen and luke. Just thought I would share. "It's about a man and a woman in love for a lifetime."
Please feel free to continue sharing with me stories of meeting Shan, provided they were positive experiences. I'm not negating any negative experiences people had, nor explaining them away, but I don't necessarily need to know details, thank you.
x
Kath, here's BD in Adelaide specifically for you.
-x
She had missed him.
Enormously.
He had been informed of that in an unexpected rambling during one of their nights in Adelaide, when she had partaken in a bit too much Moscato with her mates and had run through a fountain with her best of mates when he had been distracted by his first chat with her boyfriend.
The only remaining sober one in a group of wasted Brits and Brenda, Dylan had taken both Brenda and her boyfriend Shane back to the couple's shared hotel room.
Shane had been dispelling the contents of his stomach when Brenda struggled to remove her dress.
"Let me," Dylan had said, slipping the dress over Brenda's head.
Despite her boyfriend steps away who Dylan had taken a bit of a liking to over the course of their trip, the only reason Dylan had not flung himself on Brenda in that moment was her intoxication.
"I'll, uh," he had made a sound with his throat, "help you into your sleepwear, should I?"
"I just need a shirt," Brenda had said, at least in Dylan's translation of Brenda's slurred words. "I usually sleep in just a shirt and panties."
"I remember," Dylan had said, reminiscing of the times he had woken to Brenda slipping into one of his shirts after a long rehearsal.
He had dug through Brenda's suitcase for a shirt, until the thought had occurred to him.
He had flung off his own, offering it to Brenda.
"You always looked better in my shirts than I did," he had said. "It's a comfy one."
"I like your comfy shirts."
He had put it on for her, attempting to ignore the tumescence that had sprung up the moment his shirt had draped over Brenda.
"Still look damn good in them," he had said.
She had thanked him and had stood up too fast.
Dylan had grasped her swaying figure.
"Where do you think you're going?" he had asked.
"To check on my boyfriend," she had said. "He sounds really sick."
"I'll check on him," said Dylan. "You get back in bed."
"You shouldn't check on my boyfriend," she had said.
"I happen to think your boyfriend's a pretty cool guy," he had said. "Back in bed, babes."
Brenda had complied.
Realizing how long it had been since he had called her his babes, Dylan had flexed his fingers.
How had he ever thought he could build a life with Kelly when Brenda got him this hard just by sitting there with her penetrating eyes?
He had lifted the doona for Brenda.
She had fallen asleep as soon as she had gotten underneath it; at least, he had thought she had fallen asleep.
"Why did you come back?" she had asked.
He had released a breath, hesitant whether to answer if she wouldn't be cognizant to remember.
"I missed you," she had said. "I missed you so much, sometimes I couldn't breathe because you weren't there. But you went back to Kelly. You always choose Kelly. Why did you come back, when I had finally stopped missing you?"
Perhaps she would remember it, he had thought, in a dream.
"When you kicked me out," he had told her, "something inside of me snapped. I wanted to hurt you, Brenda, the way you had hurt me. Getting with Kelly; I knew that would hurt you. I knew if you found out, you would never forgive me for it. I thought; I thought that was what I wanted, for you to never forgive me. For us to never have another chance, another chance to break me. Except I know something now, Bren; something I didn't know then. And that's that the girl from Minnesota took possession of my soul, my dreams, a decade ago and I still have yet to get them back from her. Bren, I know now that I never want those things back from you, because I want you to have all of me, as I want to have all of you."
He hadn't been sure that she had heard him. He had been willing to repeat it later, when she was sober.
"I have Shane," she had said a few agonizing minutes later. "I love Shane."
It had been a jackhammer in his side, hearing her say she loved another man.
It wasn't the first time he had heard her say it. He had been determined it would be the last.
"Shane will never give you what we have," Dylan had said. "Shane can never love you the way I do."
"He'll never hurt me," said Brenda, "never."
"I'm sorry," said Dylan. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I keep hurting you. I don't want to hurt you anymore, Bren."
"Then let me be with Shane," said Brenda.
"I can't do that," said Dylan.
"I think you should go now."
"I'll go. For now."
He had been almost to the door when he had heard the tumble in the bathroom.
Dylan had knocked on the bathroom door.
"Shane? Man, you alright in there?" he had asked.
He had looked over at the truly sleeping Brenda.
He had turned the knob of the door, for her.
Shane sat with his back against the tub, staring up at the ceiling.
"Should I get you anything?" Dylan had asked. "Some coffee?"
"I dreaded it," said Shane, turning red-rimmed eyes on Dylan. "I dreaded the thought of you coming back but maybe, maybe it's a good thing you did."
"You can use some coffee," said Dylan.
"I've not been able to tell her," said Shane. "I've tried, many times. The words keep getting stuck in my throat."
"Tell her what?" Dylan had asked, jumping to the assumption that Shane had cheated.
Dylan had been fully aware of his hypocrisy; yet, it had not stopped him from becoming enraged on Brenda's behalf.
"I fancy him," said Shane. "Zahur. I fancy him a lot; too much. I've – I've never fancied any girl as much as I fancy him, including Brenda. How do I tell her that? How do I tell her I can't be with her anymore, because I want to be with Zahur?"
Dylan never would have expected that.
He thought of his friend Andrew back in Beverly Hills.
"You just tell her," he had told Shane. "When you're ready. Bren will understand."
"I love her," said Shane. "I do love her, but – but –"
"But she's not the one for you," said Dylan. "And you have to tell her that. Take it from someone who knows. If you aren't with the one your heart wants, you're never gonna be satisfied."
He had helped Shane into bed, as well; the one beside Brenda's.
He had left their room, engaged in a mental debate with himself over whether he should tell Brenda about Shane's confession.
Deciding he should not have been privy to that kind of information in the first place, Dylan had chosen to let Shane tell her.
He had, as soon as they had returned to London.
Dylan had moved back in a few weeks following and had shared Brenda's bedroom ever since.
Not sharing a bedroom with her was almost a foreign concept.
He strolled into the bedroom they didn't share, adding another day to his count of how long it had been since they had.
She had left the bathroom door open, almost as if she had known he would come in.
"Callie's hunting for her cleats," he said.
"On the porch," said Brenda, puckering her lips as she applied her lipstick. "I left them there to dry."
Dylan drank in the sight of her.
It had been a long time since Brenda had been that curvaceous. Seeing her like that had Dylan in a chokehold.
"Ade said something about a permission slip," he said, taking tiny steps forward.
"Signed and in the pocket of her bookbag," said Brenda.
"Mrs. Carmichael asked if Cal's free this weekend. They're going up to their cabin and she invited Callie along."
"Have you been answering my phone?"
"Only the numbers I recognize."
"You shouldn't be answering my phone."
"You shouldn't leave it on the kitchen counter."
"So that's where I left it," said Brenda. She applied her mascara. "Are you good with Callie going to their cabin?"
"If you are."
"Then she can go," said Brenda. She stepped away from the mirror to give herself a once-over. "I'm going to need to buy maternity clothes," she said. "This is the last outfit I have that still fits."
"Should I take you to the shops?" asked Dylan.
"You hate shopping."
"Your fashion shows make up for it."
Brenda said she planned to purchase her clothes online, to avoid the possibility of the press catching her browsing through maternity wear.
"I have a meeting with the producers," she said, unsnapping the part of her dress that covered her stomach. She snatched a bottle off the sink. "Once they know, then I'll set up an interview to announce the pregnancy myself."
"Can't I be part of that?"
"You hate interviews."
"They're our kids. I thought we were both going to tell the producers?"
"To keep up the façade. You're doing that plenty with the amount of times you've been on set."
"Going with you regardless," said Dylan. He took the bottle from her.
"I need that," said Brenda.
"You're carrying two of my kids at the same time, after you've carried two of the loves of my life," said Dylan. "Four of the greatest loves I'll ever have, Bren; all from the greatest one of all. You gave me a family. Least I can do is rub in your creams."
"I don't think exes rub in creams."
"We aren't your typical exes. Never have been."
And we aren't fucking exes! he screamed internally.
He squeezed a generous helping of the shea butter stretch mark cream, massaging it into Brenda's stomach before she could make another protest.
"God," she moaned. She arched her back, which folded into Dylan's chest.
"Brings back memories, doesn't it?" he asked.
"You've always been way too damn good at that," said Brenda. "It should be a crime to be that good."
Dylan tucked his chin into her neck.
"Remember the first time I did it?"
"Suncream," said Brenda, "you rubbed in my suncream."
"On the beach," said Dylan. "In Adelaide."
"I told you Shane could do that," said Brenda.
"And I told you he'd drank one too many," said Dylan.
"Then I told you I could do it."
"I snapped up the bottle before you could."
"You have a habit of that. Taking my cream bottles. I could call you a thief."
"I've taken a lot of things from you over the years, Bren; sometimes in this very house we stand in. If that makes me a thief, so be it."
"The girls have to get to school," said Brenda as she sheared their physical contact.
She could pretend all she wanted.
Pretending didn't change the way her body had reacted to his. Didn't change the way they had molded together. Didn't change the barely audible gasp he had heard from her when his hands had begun the massage.
She wanted him. Enormously.
Just as much as he wanted her.
"I told Bran and Kel that I'd take Naomi today," said Brenda. "They both had early meetings."
"We'll take the girls on our way to the producers," said Dylan.
"Or I could bring the girls and meet you there," said Brenda.
"Or we could both take the girls because our Adrianna's going to find out if she got a callback and I'd really rather prefer for us to both be there when she knows," said Dylan.
Brenda couldn't argue with that.
Sitting behind the wheel, Brenda in the seat beside him and their girls chattering away in the back, Dylan could pretend all had returned to normal in his world.
Until Naomi's question shattered the illusion.
"I'm confused," she said. "Are you two back together?"
"I don't think you should ask that," said Adrianna.
"No," said Brenda, "we aren't."
"Yet," said Dylan.
"But you're in the car together," said Naomi. "And my parents say you've been living together."
"We aren't living together," said Brenda. "Your uncle just won't leave."
"Usually people who drive together and live together are together," said Naomi.
"I've only allowed it for the kids," said Brenda.
"And because I'm the better driver," said Dylan.
"That's a bit rude," said Brenda.
"But not at all untrue," said Adrianna.
Brenda turned around to look at Callie.
"Baby, do you think your Daddy's a better driver than I am?" asked Brenda.
"Yes," said Callie, blowing an air kiss to her parents before she leapt out of the car to find Christy.
Brenda huffed and crossed her arms.
"Face it, Bren," said Dylan. "We buck stereotypes. And one of those is that I'm the better driver."
"At least I've never crashed my car," said Brenda.
"Dad!" said Adrianna. "You crashed your car?"
"Oops. Was I not supposed to tell her that?" asked Brenda. Her voice lacked a sincerity to match her apology.
"Not one of my finer moments," said Dylan. "Never drive when you aren't in the right state to drive, Ade."
"Yet somehow, my girls think he's the better driver," Brenda muttered under her breath.
"I'm the better sober driver," said Dylan. "Or do I have to bring up Glasgow?"
"You do not need to bring up Glasgow," said Brenda.
"I want to hear about Glasgow," said Adrianna.
"Well," Dylan started, "your mum decided to –"
"Too late," said Brenda. "We've arrived."
The older girls exited the car, though not before Naomi had informed her aunt and uncle that she had never seen a couple so in sync.
"I think Bran and Kel are plenty in sync," said Brenda as Naomi and Adrianna disappeared into the crowd of teens.
"Maybe," said Dylan, "but not as much as we are."
"You paid her to say that."
"Pay my niece to keep my marriage intact? Now, that's something I didn't think of."
Brenda responded by drinking from her bottle of water.
"Say it," said Dylan, eyeing her mouth.
"I'm not going to say it," said Brenda.
"Just once," said Dylan. "Say it once. Or I'll bug you until you do."
Brenda sealed the bottle.
"Bottle of water," she said, in the way she had since England had affected her accent.
"God, I love when you say that," said Dylan.
"You love every time my mouth moves," said Brenda.
"Not just your mouth," said Dylan.
"Do you know how quickly I can have an Uber here?"
"Why waste the money when we have a perfectly fine truck?"
"Says the millionaire."
"To the other millionaire."
"I'll lose some of those millions when we divorce and no, I won't be asking for alimony from you. There's no need for it."
Dylan breezed into their change of topic, as he did any time Brenda brought up their divorce that would not occur.
"I heard you talking to Cin last night," he said.
Brenda tensed.
"Want to, uh, talk about it?" he asked.
Brenda said she did not.
Dylan accepted that, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel as he mentally queried how long it would take Adrianna to return to the carpark.
"She apologized," Brenda burst out. "On Dad's behalf."
"I hope you didn't accept it."
"I didn't. There's only so many times Mum can excuse away Dad's sexist, double-standard tirades before I've had enough of them."
"As you should. Not that I'm happy about any of this, but I am glad you're sticking to your guns."
Brenda might have done the last time she and Jim had fallen out, if the fallout hadn't been repaired by the way Callie's birth had played out.
"You'll have to help me tell the girls," said Brenda. "I don't know if I can bring myself to tell them that they're more than welcome to visit Grandpa if they so wish, but he won't be meeting their siblings."
"Can't say I'll miss Jim, but I'm having trouble imagining Cin not meeting them."
"All Mum has to do is stand up to Dad. That's all. If she can do that, then she can meet them. In the meantime, they have their Nana Iris and if my parents are going to insist on acting like this, then Nana Iris is all our kids need."
An urgent patter sounded on Dylan's side of the car.
He opened the door to Adrianna.
"I didn't get it," said Adrianna. "I didn't get the callback."
"Oh, honey," said Brenda.
"What?" asked Dylan. "How did our girl not get a callback? No kid in this school sounded better than you did up there!"
"There will be other callbacks," said Brenda, "though I do have half a mind to march in there and ask why my daughter didn't get one."
"Those old farts are probably mad you didn't apply your talents here and are using our daughter to get back at you for it," said Dylan.
"Yeah," said Brenda, "we're marching in."
She unbuckled her seatbelt.
"Calm down, both of you," said Adrianna. "I didn't get a callback because the director said it wasn't necessary. They'd found their star and it's me. I got it. I got the part!"
Dylan whooped and pumped his fist.
"You almost gave your dad a coronary," said Brenda.
"And almost got both of us in trouble with the West Bev administration," said Dylan.
"I didn't think you'd react like that," said Adrianna.
Brenda stepped out to give Adrianna a congratulatory embrace.
Dylan enveloped them.
"Our little girl's a star," he said.
"I have to perform first, Daddy," said Adrianna.
"Next stop, Broadway," said Brenda.
"I was thinking more the West End, Mum; like you," said Adrianna. "Or maybe Disneyland Paris."
They parted, Brenda misty-eyed from Adrianna's words.
"Better get your mum on to work now," said Dylan. "Have a good day at school, baby."
"I'll have a great day," said Adrianna. "You two just hugged."
"I hugged you," said Brenda. "Your dad joined in."
"You still hugged," said Adrianna.
She skipped off to class.
"Sometimes, she is way too much like you," said Brenda, getting back in the truck.
"She just got a part without needing a callback," said Dylan. "That's all you, babes. When's the last time you were given a callback?"
"It has been a while," Brenda admitted. "But I did have them."
"You sure did," said Dylan.
"You'd run lines with me for hours to make sure I nailed those callbacks."
"Callbacks weren't the only thing you nailed."
"Stop doing that."
"Kiss me."
"Not happening."
"Then I won't stop doing it."
"Steal the kiss if you want it so badly."
"I'm not gonna kiss you until I can be sure you'll kiss me back."
He wouldn't give her the chance to push him off, to reject him.
"I hope you enjoyed the last kiss you'll ever get from me," said Brenda.
"Looking forward to the next one," said Dylan.
"Why are you making this so bloody difficult? You've had other women. There's no reason you shouldn't be able to have them again."
"I told you that reason eighteen years ago," said Dylan. "It hasn't changed in all the years since, and it's not going to. Even if our twins weren't in your belly." He flicked on the turn signal. "You've told directors about this before."
"Directors, yes, but not producers," said Brenda.
"Same concept. Now breathe in, breathe out, and tell yourself those producers would be imbeciles to write out Brenda McKay over something like being horny for her husband."
"You almost had me," said Brenda. Her eyes snapped open.
"I'm just spitting facts," said Dylan. "We're obsessed with each other's body parts, particularly our lower body parts. That's facts."
"Your dad is seriously the worst," Brenda told her dress.
"That's me," said Dylan. "Mr. Worst. Married to Mrs. Worst."
"That's worse than one of Steve's jokes."
"That might be the most insulting remark you've ever made to me."
"Never let anyone make you think your mum's a drama queen," said Brenda, "because your dad's the biggest drama queen of all."
"Keep that up and I'll accept that role your casting director offered me."
"You are not going to play my love interest. You're not even an actor."
"Plenty of actors didn't start out acting and who knows? The way Ade got her role, maybe I have some acting talent hidden within me, too."
"Your dad is not the worst," said Brenda.
"That's better," said Dylan.
"He is a little annoying shite, though."
"Guilty as charged. Except the little part. That would be you, sweetheart."
"I'd hardly call myself little right now."
"Unless you've shot up in height during this pregnancy, you're still little. My sassy pixie."
"You should know better than to offend a pregnant woman."
"If you weren't little, we wouldn't fit together so well. But you are. So we do."
"I don't need reminding of how my eleven-year-old daughter is now taller than I am, thank you."
"I didn't intentionally pass on my height to the girls, and it doesn't look like Ade will be getting much taller so she isn't that far off from you."
"I'm going to pray one of the twins stays short for a very long time."
"Did you decide if you want us to find out the sexes?"
"I think I'd prefer to be surprised this time. Unless you're desperate to know."
He didn't know if he could raise a son, not when his own relationships with the father figures in his life had been turbulent, at best.
He had raised daughters well, mainly due to Brenda.
But could he raise a son?
He knew what he didn't want for his relationships with his children.
He didn't want to apply impossible standards on them, the way Jim Walsh had always done with the both of his.
Brenda had been the main target of Jim's standards, but Brandon had also felt the constant need to please his father.
Dylan believed Jim's political aspirations for his son may have been the deciding factor in why Brandon had chosen to run – and then lose – for a seat in the Senate.
There was one father figure of Dylan's that had never let him down.
Nat Bussichio.
He could raise a son, the way Nat had raised Frankie.
With an overabundance of love and understanding, as Dylan had given to his girls.
"We can wait," said Dylan. "That's fine."
He darted around the truck to open the door for Brenda.
"I can open my own door," said Brenda.
"I'm well aware of that," said Dylan.
He kept his hand against her back as they were directed into the office of the executive producer.
"Façade," he whispered when she threw a look at him.
He had taken a jump in time and stepped into his father's old office.
The only difference in decor was the EP's abundance of family photos, which Jack had never hung up in his.
Kids went to school, Jack used to say. Parents went to work. They're separated for a reason and there's no reason to bring those kids to work, in any capacity.
Dylan had filled his office with pictures of his girls and Brenda.
Both offices.
"Nice decoration," said Dylan.
"Thanks," said the EP. "I find I'm more productive when I have family around, in any capacity."
"I'm with you there," said Dylan.
"It's interesting that you should mention family," said Brenda, "because my hus – Dylan and I, we've asked for this meeting to inform you that we are expecting. And well, given the rate of how I'm expanding at present, I do think it is a strong possibility that I may become a bit, um, enormous."
"First, may I offer my congratulations," said the EP, "and second, may I say your timing couldn't have been more impeccable?"
It turned out that the writers had penned a story in which Brenda could easily conceal her pregnancy, however large she became.
"See?" said Dylan. "You were worried for nothing. And now that the producers know, the gang knows, your parents know…"
"And we told the London crew…"
"Guess there's no use trying to put off the media any longer. Set up that interview."
"Perhaps this will lay the rumors to rest."
"What rumors?"
"Did you think I wouldn't find out that the tabloids are accusing me of cheating on you, with Gina?"
"I had hoped you wouldn't."
"If I know my fans, they're clapping back at anyone who tries to paint those falsities as truth," said Brenda. "I won't think much of them. We both know I've not cheated on you, certainly not with Gina. You can't stop a hater, merely provide them with information to prove them wrong. Haters can't stand when they're proven incorrect."
"The information being our twins?"
"We're giving the media something to talk about besides my supposed affair with Gina Kincaid."
"You could tell them, about mine," said Dylan.
"You've repeatedly told me you didn't have an affair with Gina," said Brenda.
"I didn't, but I don't care if the press thinks I did if it'll get them off this theory that you did. I'd rather be the one they're slamming for cheating than you."
"If I tell the press that you cheated on me with Gina, some tabloid's going to learn about Gina's pregnancy and then you would not only be called a homewrecker by my protective, devoted fans, you would also be raked over the coals for getting her pregnant."
"Why do you care what the media or your fans think of me when you're so determined to divorce me?"
"Adrianna's old enough to be on social media and Callie's probably snuck on there once or twice, herself. Neither of them need to see their father's name being dragged by either the media or my fans. Much as I love my fans, a few of them have been known to become concerning, at times, and I don't need them fighting my battles for me when it comes to you, or to Gina."
"Your mouth says it's about the girls, but your eyes are telling me more."
"My eyes are telling you I'm Ubering over to Val's office to meet her for lunch."
"That'll be difficult, seeing as you left your purse in the truck. One would think you did that intentionally, to bum a lift off me. All you needed to do was ask."
"I'd like to have my purse, please."
"Can't give you your purse if you're gonna use it to call an Uber."
"You're holding my purse hostage?"
"I'm holding the mobile in your purse hostage," said Dylan.
He got Brenda back in the truck and took off before she could contact an Uber.
"You could have at least waited until I'd put on my seatbelt," Brenda grumbled.
"I'm driving five miles an hour in this carpark," said Dylan. "Nothing stopping you from putting on your seatbelt."
"Where did you put my purse, Dylan?" Brenda checked the backseat.
"In the boot," said Dylan. "Didn't think it wise to leave it where you left it, on the floor of your seat. Now sit your fine ass down and buckle up because we're gonna gather some speed."
"You used my pregnancy brain against me," said Brenda. "I should hate you right now."
"You've never been able to hate me before, but sure; go ahead and try."
Brenda buckled in.
"Don't you have work to do?" she asked.
"I'll do it after I drop you off," said Dylan. "Perks of making your own hours. You could try it sometime."
"I blame Shane for this. He's the one that suggested you for the job that gave you a leg up in advocacy."
"Oh, we can blame Shane for a lot," said Dylan. "Namely, giving you a reason to break up with him so you could come back to me. That hasn't been so bad, has it? Being with me?"
"It was nice whilst it lasted," Brenda admitted. "The problem is that it never lasts."
"Not when we give up," said Dylan. "How many times have you told the girls not to give up on something they're passionate about?"
"You cannot compare this to that brief time Callie wanted to give up footie after she'd missed one goal."
"How about the time Adrianna wanted to give up painting?"
"Adrianna did give up painting."
"Scratch that last one. But she didn't give up tap, Bren, because –"
"Because I told her to not give up on something she's passionate about," said Brenda.
"Judging from the size of your belly and the shrinkage of your wardrobe, I'd say we're pretty damn passionate about each other," said Dylan. "So why should we give that up, when we rarely let the girls give up what they're passionate about?"
"I'm not going through this with you again. We have a history, Dylan; a very nice history, and we'll always have a future because of our children, but you have to accept that the trust is broken. We can't come back from that."
"I'd believe that if we hadn't bounced back from broken trust before, a couple times."
He should have driven a little slower to keep her in the car longer.
Brenda climbed down from the truck.
"I'm on set tonight," she said. "Don't wait up."
"I'll drop by when I'm done with work. Take you to dinner, then take you to set."
"No, you'll pick up the girls and spend time with them. I will see all of you when I return home."
"I love you."
"I better not see you on set tonight, Dylan."
She had forgotten her phone.
Dylan bent over to swipe it up.
Stepping out of the truck, he crashed right into someone.
"Sorry," he said. He left his eyes trained on Brenda's mobile, debating whether he should bring it to her or hold onto it so that she would have no choice but to let him take her to set.
"We haven't been this close to each other since we made him," said the voice fondly. "Can you feel it, Dylan? Can you feel our love for each other?"
Dylan released her immediately.
"You seem to have trouble accepting that I despise you, Gina," he said, "and that I'll never forgive you for torching my life the way you have. Where did you meet LL, anyway?"
"That," said Gina, "is none of your business."
"It is my business when it pertains to my wife," said Dylan.
"You think you're so clever," said Gina. "If you are, figure it out."
She had him blocked in.
The only way he would get around Gina was by sidestepping her.
It almost worked.
It would have, if she hadn't pressed her belly against him.
He couldn't shove a pregnant woman, even if it was Gina.
"You can't tell me you don't feel that," said Gina. "Our baby, greeting you."
"I'm not convinced it is our baby," said Dylan. "I'm not even sure it's your baby; in fact, I'm almost convinced it isn't yours. Aren't you supposed to hate me equally as much as I hate you?"
"This is what we do," said Gina. "I tell you I hate you. You say it back. I yell at you to react, pretend to sleep with another guy to get you to react. Then we make out, makeouts that set our worlds on fire. I guarantee you that little wifey of yours has never had the kind of passion with you that we had."
"I'm not the same guy," said Dylan. "You aren't the same woman."
"You get crazy jealous over me and hit people with doors. You don't defend me when Kelly accuses me of lying, then you come around and apologize for it."
"That isn't love, Gina. You said it yourself, all those years ago. What we had wasn't love. What I have with Brenda; that's love. That's a fierce love, one people all over the globe search for every day. I've found it, and I'm not letting you take it from me."
"You thought you were in love with Kelly once, too. I just gotta make you remember, Dylan. Just gotta make you remember how we were. Just gotta make you love me, and forget all about Brenda. It wouldn't be the first time you forgot her. I never even knew about her to begin with. She can't be all that important to you if you left her for Kelly."
Gina's lips were on his before he could react.
Fuck.
Brenda.
"Get off of me!" he told Gina.
Gina turned to see where his attention had gone, giving Dylan the escape he needed.
"I just came out to see if I left my mobile in the truck," said Brenda.
"It's – it's here," said Dylan, handing her the mobile.
"Thank you," said Brenda. "Gina. You're looking well. Everything alright with the baby?"
"All good," said Gina, confused.
"Bren," said Dylan.
"Just came out for this," said Brenda. She held up her mobile. "Now that I have it, I'll be going back inside."
Brenda possessed surprising dexterity for a woman of her height and weight.
Dylan chased after her.
"She kissed me!" he shouted as he caught up and fell in line with her steps. "Bren, she kissed me!"
"I know that," said Brenda. "I was watching. You didn't kiss her back, but you didn't stop her, either. You didn't react, at all."
"I – I couldn't," said Dylan. "Not without pushing at her, and I couldn't do that."
"Because of your baby."
"Because of a baby."
"I wouldn't be surprised if Gina had a photographer on hand for the tabloids to capture it," said Brenda, "either your violence or your affection."
"Violence I didn't show her. Affection I didn't show her."
"Yes, I saw."
"If you saw that, if you know I didn't kiss her, why did you run?"
"Because I've competed with a girl for your affections before, Dylan, and I know the outcome. I know what happens when another girl decides to fight for your affections. It never works in my favor. I'd be more upset that she cheated on David, but maybe they have an open relationship."
"This isn't like then," said Dylan. "I don't want her. I want you. The mother of my children."
"We're both the mother of your children."
"Fuck it," said Dylan.
He grabbed both sides of Brenda's face and went in.
With whip-fast reflexes honed over the years, Brenda twisted her head.
Dylan's lips collided with her cheek, instead of their intended spot.
"Eighteen years together," he told her, pressing his forehead to her cheek. "Set aside the earlier shit, the shit you said you accepted my apology for, that you said you forgave me for. Eighteen years, Brenda. Eighteen fucking years. You have to fight for that."
"I can't fight," said Brenda. "I can't, when I know what happens when I do. That summer, that winter, are just as much a part of our story as any of the summers and winters we've shared since."
"Do it for the kids," said Dylan. "Fight for us, for our four kids. Fight for the life we've shared, for the memories we've created together, for all the photos in our albums."
"Why? So I can find Gina throwing herself at you at every corner? I am doing this for the kids, for our twins. I can't get riled up every time Gina comes onto you and don't kid yourself that she won't because we both know how a woman like that operates. I can't stress myself out seeing her kiss you, not when the twins are relying on me to keep them safe."
"Don't let her win."
"She won the day I found out you lied to me. Again."
"It's not over," said Dylan. "It wasn't over in Adelaide, and it isn't over now. It won't ever be over."
"We're co-parents," said Brenda. "That's all. Co-parents who used to be married, just like David and Donna. Once you can accept that, then –"
"Sucks for you that I don't accept that, babes, and I never will. We'll never be comparable to the ex-Silvers. Never. Because Silver? He'd become miserable with Donna. Wasn't his fault, wasn't Donna's fault; they'd just outgrown each other. You and I; we haven't outgrown each other. I'm miserable without you, Bren, and however much you fight against it, I know you feel the same. Let me show you. At dinner."
"Sorry I took so long, Bren. Ready for that lunch now?"
"Valerie."
"Dylan."
"You kind of interrupted my conversation with my wife," said Dylan.
"Then I'll advise you to not hold conversations with your wife in my office building," said Val.
"I wouldn't have to if your employee hadn't attacked me in the parking lot."
"I'll meet you in the car," said Brenda. "Keys?"
Valerie handed Brenda her keys.
"No driving off with my baby," said Val.
"You're planning to drive off with mine," said Dylan.
"I'm starving and I assume Bren's more starving," said Val. "Am I wrong?"
"Not at all," said Brenda. "Our conversation was over, anyway."
"Our conversation was not over," said Dylan.
"I'll see you after work," Brenda told him, leaving to warm up Valerie's car.
"Really could've picked a better time to come out, Val," said Dylan.
"You're right; I purposely chose now to come out so I could end your conversation with Bren," Val mocked.
"You could've at least given me a heads-up that Gina was stepping outside."
"How could I do that when I didn't know you were outside?"
"I didn't say you had to hire her."
"You told me to get the truth out of her however I could. This is part of that plan, and you weren't complaining about it when I let you listen in on us."
"She won't fight," said Dylan. "Bren. She's practically handing me over to Gina, all because she thinks Gina's won anyway."
"Bren would kill me for saying this, but she threatened Gina," said Val. "At the mall."
"Bren threatened Gina?"
"She said Gina didn't want to find out what kind of connections Bren has if she found out Gina did something to you without your consent."
"So Bren does think it's possible."
"You didn't hear that from me."
"Why'd you tell me?"
"For the girls," said Val. "I did it for my nieces, because I grew up with parents whose fights turned to hatred, parents who resented each other. I don't want them to be in a family like that."
"I assure you, nothing Bren says or does will ever make me hate her."
"My mother said the same, before she killed my father and let me think I did it," said Val.
"That is a completely different situation," said Dylan, "with no basis in comparison whatsoever."
"I don't know," said Val. "Bren's pretty good at hitting below the belt when she wants to; like Steve, but worse. She does it enough, you might start to resent her."
"I can take whatever she dishes out. Careful, Val, or I'm gonna start to assume you want Bren to get back with me."
"I want the kids to have a nice, stable family with parents who don't hate each other," Val repeated. "That's the only reason I've agreed to help you. For your kids."
"You've always been a worse liar than they give you credit for."
"And you're way more perceptive than they give you credit for."
Brenda stomped into the building.
"Didn't you know it's not nice to make a pregnant woman wait for food?" she pouted at Valerie.
"Just having a conversation with your ex," said Val.
"Everyone needs to stop calling her my ex," said Dylan. "She ain't my ex 'til the ink is dry, and the ink won't be wet to begin with."
"It'll be a little wet," said Brenda. "There's space for two names."
"You know what else was a little wet?" asked Dylan.
"We're in a building," said Brenda. "A public building."
"I'd say it's more of a private building," said Dylan. "With a private owner, her private mate, and her private mate's glorious private –"
"You might as well just sleep with him and get it over with," said Val. "The sexual tension is exuding off of the both of you, in waves."
"Are you my best friend, or his?" asked Brenda.
"We don't have sex just to 'get it over with,'" said Dylan.
"If sexual tension is exuding off of us," said Brenda, "which it isn't, but if it is, then what do you think is exuding off of you and David?"
"That's a good question," said Dylan. "What is exuding off of you and Silver, Val?"
"He likes Outlander. You like Outlander," said Brenda. "You could do a marathon of it together."
"He's with Gina," said Val.
"Who just kissed Dylan and didn't seem to care that she cheated on David by doing so, so one can assume they have an open relationship," said Brenda.
"An open relationship you could use to your advantage," said Dylan, playing along with Brenda to taunt Valerie despite knowing that David did not have an open relationship and wouldn't at all care that Gina had cheated on him.
"Neither of you are turning this around on me," said Val.
"See what happens when you make me wait to eat?" said Brenda. "You're preventing my children from getting the nutrients they require. These are the consequences."
"If Val's not taking you to lunch, I can always push my hours back and take you myself," said Dylan.
"Off to lunch we go," said Val.
She led Brenda away.
Dylan waited until he could be completely sure that Gina had vacated the carpark before leaving himself.
He did have work to do; work of the research kind.
Pulling into the reserved spot at the country club, he slung the case of golf clubs over his shoulder.
He didn't play golf. Jack had played golf, and had played it well.
Steve had said that Rush had only agreed to meet with Dylan in a game of golf.
So there Dylan stood, with the golf clubs that used to belong to his father, waiting for Rush Sanders and the man Rush would introduce him to.
Dylan managed one hole.
Rush scored five, out of five.
"It's difficult, what you're asking of me to do," said Rush's longtime friend as they moved on to the sixth hole. "There's a countless amount of these types of facilities, all across the country."
"Start in LA," said Dylan, "and Ithaca. Gina's from Ithaca. She may have gone back there."
"Rush said you were willing to pay?"
"If you get me the information I need, I'll pay whatever you think the rate should be for your services," said Dylan.
"I don't normally deal in these kinds of dubious requests," said the man, "but the wife and I have been struggling lately and we could use the pick-me-up. Don't tell Rush I told you."
"Do we have a deal, then, sir?" asked Dylan.
"I'll see if I can find this Gina Kincaid in the system and let you know where she went. Though it might be easier to ask her yourself."
"Tried that," said Dylan. "She isn't willing to comply and I need answers, ASAP."
"May I ask why?"
"Sir, if someone had threatened your wife and children, wouldn't you do everything in your power to find out who that person was?" asked Dylan.
"I sure would," said the man.
"Don't tell Rush I told you that," said Dylan. "He has a soft spot for my wife and I wouldn't want to cause him any anxiety over this."
"Looks like we will both be keeping things from Rush," said the man.
Uncaring that Rush Sanders had run a victorious lap around him when he had crushed Dylan on every hole, Dylan thanked him for setting up the meeting.
"My son said it had something to do with Brenda," said Rush. "You know I've come to love that young lady as if she were my own."
"People have a tendency to do that with Bren," said Dylan.
"She and that Valerie were a great source of comfort to my son after he lost his Janet," said Rush. "Not that sweet Kelly wasn't, but her condition did make it more difficult for her to come out here as frequently as Brenda did."
"She didn't want Steve and Mads to suffer alone," said Dylan.
"And you ensured she would be able to come out as often as she did," said Rush. "I've therefore come to care for you, too, young man, almost as much as I care for your mother. It's a pity women aren't as forgiving these days when you cheat on them as they used to be. In my day, all it took was a pleasantly arranged bouquet and a box of chocolates, with a couple of well-placed apologies."
"I don't think that's a pity at all," said Dylan, "and Bren doesn't have to forgive me for something I didn't do."
"Keep telling yourself that," said Rush. "Tell yourself it enough and maybe you'll start to convince her."
"Oh, I'm gonna convince her, alright," said Dylan. "I'm gonna re-convince her that she's the love of my life. When she accepts that, she'll re-accept that I'm the love of hers."
"You kids and your theatrics," said Rush. "Between you and my son, I don't know which of you are more of the hopeless romantic."
"Sir, when you have a wife like mine, it sort of goes with the territory," said Dylan.
He returned to the truck, satisfied that every facet of his plan was going exactly as he had set it up.
He just had to wait for the information; once he had that, he could roll right along to the next step of the plan.
He could always trick Brenda onto a plane and over across the oceans to Adelaide, if he had to.
On the other hand, bringing Brenda on a long-haul flight might be an idea to save for when her feet hadn't begun to swell.
Not that Dylan would bring the swelling to Brenda's attention.
He knew better.
She would mention it herself soon enough, when her favorite pair of shoes would stop fitting.
As they had the first time Brenda's feet had swelled for him to care for, when she had developed frostbite from sprinting through a fountain in a South Australian midwinter that had carried the winds of the Antarctic Ocean in her direction.
When she had confessed she had missed him.
As Dylan would get her to confess again, before he proceeded to make sweet, passionate love to the wife whose arousal he had noticed when he had rubbed in her cream.
She hadn't been able to hide that from him, just like she had failed to hide her anger when she had caught Gina on him.
Brenda had never been particularly good at bluffing with her eyes, the way she could make a decent bluff with her lips.
Her mouth told him she was done with him, with everything they had meant to each other, with their entire story. Her mouth said she was only speaking to him for their children's sakes.
Her eyes; her eyes told him to continue fighting, to give her a reason to return to him.
He would listen to her eyes, rather than to her mouth.
Those eyes he had loved from the first moment he had set his own eyes upon them.
Those eyes passed on to their oldest daughter, and perhaps to one or both of their twins.
Those eyes that had seared into his when she had told him the three words that had changed everything.
I forgive you.
Followed by three more words, the words he would not rest until he got her to say again.
-x
Was unsure whether I'd be able to write them since I'd last done on Saturday, before we heard the news, but thankfully, I still can. I can't believe it's been a week already.
Sources: Google, Reddit (responses from locals.)
New ShanDo vid & LukeShan vid up on wishuponadream91 on YT, IG, and TikTok.
(Shout-out to KJ and Guest to express my continued gratitude and appreciation, as well as those of you whose review I could respond to directly. KJ, I love that idea that we are keeping Shan's memory alive by continuing to write about her characters or make edits of her characters. Thank you! Adrianna in semi-canon was an actress and singer, so it works out perfectly to keep that canonical part of her and make it be because she's Bren's daughter. Big Jim, always blowing a fuse. Val better watch her back! Guest, thank you! Roy was fun to write; it may have been the first time I did? Gina's baby actually being BD's is an interesting theory, one Dylan's certainly contemplating. Cindy is sweet, but was written so one-dimensional, especially for a mother of the nineties [Kitty Forman in the seventies had much more agency!] that she needs a bit of shaking up. Though the question is if she'll leave Jim or if he might actually, gasp, change? It's always nice when Jim and Dylan or Jim and Brenda get on well in the future, but sometimes, toxic relationships with parents stay toxic relationships with parents and in this one, Jim very much still treats Bren like she's sixteen.)
Thanks a million!