"Willow Rosenberg is an emotionally neglected child." Lydia informed Quentin, Joyce and Charles.
"In what way?" Charles asked, wondering what he'd missed.
"Her parents started leaving her with nannies when she was about 8 years old and by the time she was twelve they were leaving her alone for extended periods of time."
"Why?" Joyce asked, cursing herself for missing another child's circumstances. Alex had people looking out for him after his parents abandoned him, Willow apparently didn't.
"Lecture tours, they're psychologists and lecture about the papers they write. They told Willow because she's a genius she can take care of herself. Since she figured out how to cook and clean and grocery shop on her own, she believes them. From my conversation with Willow, her mother appears to have very high expectations of Willow's behavior and Willow works hard to meet those expectations, failure isn't an option. Willow can't even face the possibility of what failing to live up to her mother's expectations might mean for her."
"Twelve? Damnit," Charles swore. "Twelve is how old Alex was when his parents abandoned him. He had his uncle and myself and we helped him until he gained emancipation status and we still help him. But he, Jesse and Willow lost their friendship during that time. Alex was dealing with so much already and Willow had a crush on him that made him really uncomfortable, it was one thing too much. My concern was Alex, I barely knew Willow. I didn't realize there was a problem."
"This isn't anyone except Willow's parent's fault. Neither you nor Alex could be expected to see there was a problem. Willow, herself, doesn't even understand there's a problem. Emotional neglect occurs when caregivers fail to provide the emotional support, validation, and attention children need during their formative years. Emotional neglect can be just as harmful as more overt forms of abuse, and it can have long-lasting effects on a child's emotional and psychological development."
"What kind of effects?" Joyce asked worrying for the girl who meant so much to her daughter.
"Extremes in behavior which can include being overly compliant to authority, teenagers rebel, get in trouble, it's natural, when they're overly compliant it stresses them just considering the possibility of doing something that can cause trouble. Or they can go the opposite route and become aggressive, or being overly passive or passive aggressive. Extremes being the operative word."
"Willow volunteered to decorate for Parent Teacher night, she volunteered to be Ms. Calendar's assistant, she's very eager to help Buffy and Buffy once noted that Willow had a knee jerk reaction to obeying authority. Those are examples of what you're talking about, isn't it?" Joyce asked.
"They would qualify, yes. On the surface it just looks like an overachiever, eager to help, until you take in to account her situation with her parents. She's so eager to please but it stems from fear, fear of authority, fear of losing the people she cares about, fear of being abandoned."
"How do we help her?" Charles asked.
"An investigation into her parents needs to be conducted and charges leveled. It's doubtful they'll get prison time, this form of abuse rarely does, most likely therapy will be court ordered. Which probably won't benefit her parents or their family situation, but will benefit Willow. In one conversation with her it was enough for her to open up and talk to me. She's 18 herself now so emancipation isn't an option. She's only months away from graduating from High School and plans to attend college so moving out of her parents house right now and into her own apartment won't help the situation any and would only be temporary anyway since she'll be living in a dorm once she starts college in the fall. And she's going to have a hard time dealing with the knowledge that her parents are in trouble because she said something to me about her situation. Both they and her, will blame her. The backlash against her could mean they cut off communication entirely. She needs emotional support and validation from another source."
"Than she'll have it." Joyce said determinedly. "We can help her see there are people who care about her."
"I need to tell you something else before you commit yourself to helping her." Lydia responded. "I hope it doesn't affect your choice to help her, but before I agree to you being an emotional support for her I need to know how you'll react."
"To what?" Joyce asked.
"Willow is just beginning to acknowledge to herself that she has feelings for another girl. She never expected it and she's questioning her sexuality as a result."
"It doesn't concern me." Joyce assured her. "She's not hurting anyone feeling the way she does, so it's not an issue."
"You might change your mind when I tell you it's Buffy she's found herself interested in."
"Buffy? Considering there weren't many options in Willow's circle of friends, I figured it was one of them, it being Buffy doesn't bother me. I haven't seen anything though that makes me think Buffy might return her feelings though."
"Doesn't mean Buffy isn't potentially open to the possiblity. What made Willow start noticing her interest in Buffy is that Buffy and Faith may be showing signs of interest in each other and Faith is openly bisexual. To avoid as much emotional damage and fallout as possible, I'm going to recommend counseling for all of them. Buffy and Faith should have been able to rely on Mr. Giles for some help with emotional and mental concerns they might have had, but I seriously doubt he ever considered that a part of his job."
"Then we'll make sure they'll get it." Charles decided.
"The Council will supply a Counselor." Quentin informed him. "We have a medical department, psych classes are still fairly new but we've been working on adding it to Field Watcher training. But we do have Counselors, like Lydia. Miss Summers and Miss Lehaine and their support team need it now, not when we can get a Field Watcher here. We'll help them."