LXXXVI

Horresco Referens

Kouga returns to Kagome with his arms full of leather and something that gleams like stardust, his eyes bright with anticipation. He's always like this when he brings her things, but this time there's a hint of something extra, as if he's more pleased with himself than usual.

One at a time he hands her garments, and she recognizes them as soon as she has them in her hands, can shake them out and look at them. The two main things are a white kosode and red hakama, a well-known uniform to a girl who grew up in a shrine. It's just that she's never seen either garment made from fine, soft leather before.

But the robe he hands her last isn't leather but maybe silk, or at least something like it. It's too thin and transparent to wear on its own, and she decides it must be an underrobe, meant to be worn against the skin. The lack of other undergarments reinforces her thought, and she turns it over in her hands. There don't seem to be any seams in the fine and shining fabric. "Kouga? These are… a miko's clothes?"

Kouga grins at her question, boasting just a little. "Yes, a miko's clothes. But you'll find no others like them, we made them ourselves. I hunted for the right skins; the elders made the leather from them. Shiori stitched them, with Saya's help. Except the underrobe, that's not of our making."

"It's beautiful, it reminds me of something in a story. Like a fairy robe."

Proudly, he grins at her, leans forward and whispers near her ear. "It is. It was stolen, but not by me. A goddess took off 81 layers of robes to bathe in a sacred pool; a man took them, and ran, dropping them as he fled. Mortals tell romantic stories, but would a Lady of Brilliant Heaven suffer such an affront?"

Kagome tilts her head, considers. "That's true. Probably not, so what really happened?"

"He was killed, of course. His soul serves her as a lute string, if it hasn't broken by now. And the robes that he dropped, tainted with the Dust of this world, were no longer worthy of the Lady. She left them behind, and they have been traded among yōkai for centuries, or maybe longer. They have power, some of them. The closer they were to the Lady, the more of her heavenly aura they absorbed."

With gentle hands, he takes the leather from her grasp and puts it aside, then pulls her straight and tosses the seamless robe at her. It floats over her skin by itself, and dresses her in the faintest glow, a sheen like golden glitter more than obscuring gauze. "You will wear this always, Kagome, like armor next to your skin. When we go into danger, when we go places we haven't been where there might be."

"Like armor!" She's half-laughing, but his eyes are deadly serious.

"Yes. The story is true, not just a story. The light of a heavenly robe is a kind of protection on its own. Just to be in its presence obscures you with that aura; to wear it even more so. Plain steel won't penetrate such fabric, no matter how sharp, and neither will the fangs and claws of beasts or yōkai. Even a daiyōkai might not easily tear their way through."

"You… you're serious? It just looks so flimsy, no matter how beautiful it is."

With both hands, Kouga takes the hem of the robe and tears, with all his considerable strength. She knows just how sharp his claws are, but the shining cloth resists even when he slashes against it, startling her. "See? I traded lesser treasures for this, for you. I can't deny your power, or your skill, but you can't deny that you're human, and fragile. And you were right, what you said before. A miko's arrow won't save you from samurai, or daimyo, or all the other kinds of human trouble."

Kagome sighs, and then shrugs. Considering all the trouble likely to come from the Taijiya, from Kagewaki, from the world at large once they started interacting with it… "No, you're right. I can't blame you, I just wasn't expecting anything like this. But don't expect me to wear it around the den."

"No. Except maybe here, for me, like you're wearing it now." The hunger in his eyes is something she knows very well. She's almost immune to its effect, flushes only faintly and doesn't try to cover her body, which is very visible through the heavenly robe.

"Maybe. But not now, Kouga." She picks up the leather again, frowning a little. "These… are they really armored or something? They're heavy, I've never seen hakama so heavy." She puts them down again carefully, but there is no sound of metal, just the rustle of layers of leather moving against each other. "But then, why is the kosode so light?"

With apparent unwillingness, he turns his attention from her and focuses on the white kosode instead. "Because it was made from the skin of the baku."

Kouga's stare is expectant, as if that should be enough explanation, but Kagome frowns and shakes her head. "I don't get it, I mean, I know what a baku is, I used to have a little statue of one by my bed when I was a kid. But what does that have to do with weight?"

"Baku aren't just yōkai, woman, that's the skin of a celestial beast. They watch over humans, and feed on evil dreams. It's said good luck follows wherever they go. But occasionally, their hunger is too much, or they're called too often. When it overwhelms them, they feed on human dreams and desires. Then they're slain, and the purified skin becomes a precious thing. Whether a baku does good or evil, their nature doesn't change."

She tilts her head, blinks at him thoughtfully. "So… a celestial beast is a celestial beast, no matter what?"

"Yes. And your hakama are… well, maybe not the opposite, but close. They're dragon skin, from the dragons of the deep sea. That might be considered armor, your way, but not because there's steel or iron or anything else. It's just the innermost layer of a very thick skin." He winces a little, but his proud smirk is prouder. "Very thick skin. They don't like to trade, you know."

She lifts an eyebrow at him. "I do now."

"Well… Right, that's right, why would you know?" His grin turns sheepish, but only for a moment. "But I beat a few hides out of them, and even a fair price, too. Wasn't even hard, that clan's not what they used to be since Lord Mutt sealed up the big guy."

A tiny frown curls the corner of Kagome's lips, but she sighs and lets it go a moment after. He hunts often, and she has never worried for him, since the first time she went with him and saw his skill and pleasure in being his own self most truly. Now, she knows that sometimes when he hunts, it's for more than meat, and what can she say?

She can't berate him, can't worry for him in a way that he understands. She doesn't even know when he managed to pull this off. It's vaguely exciting in one way – he was fighting dragons! And her terror is not at all vague – he was fighting dragons. But he's so unconcerned about it, and she would have noticed if he'd been wounded, or if he'd disappeared for days to hide such wounds.

"You have your worrying face on again, Kagome. What are you thinking?"

"That you put yourself in danger for me, just to give me a gift, and I didn't know it. And I don't really like it, but I know… it's normal for you, so what can I say?" She sighs, a long breath that blows over-long bangs up away from her forehead. "I'm almost annoyed at myself. Did you really have no trouble beating dragons?"

"No trouble at all." He takes her chin in hand and tips her head up so she can't avoid his eyes. His gaze is a little sad, and she regrets her doubts. "Woman, you're the one who reminded me that I owe you half my life. I can't make up my mind, because it seems like you can't either. Should I regret sharing these things with you, or not?"

"I don't mean it like that, don't regret anything, but… hmm." She steps back from him to collect her thoughts, pulls the white leather kosode over the shining heavenly robe, ties it and steps into the hakama, one leg at a time. His hands move with hers, helping her smooth pleats stitched into the leather, tie the cords and keep the folds aligned.

He doesn't rush her to talk, and his expression relaxes as she dresses. She thinks it's because even if he doesn't understand her, as long as she's putting these clothes on, she's accepting his gift and that means she must understand him. And she does, a little. At least, she hopes she does.

"Next time, just tell me when you're going out to do something special. That you'll be fighting, not hunting, I mean. Even if you want to surprise me, just… don't tell me what you're after. Then I can welcome you home properly."

"Properly."

"Kouga. I just don't like not knowing when you're in danger. I don't like acting like nothing's happening when you… are risking your life."

"But then you'll worry when I'm gone."

She sticks her tongue out at him. "Use your brain, seriously. If you don't tell me, I'll worry every time instead of sometimes. Just accept it as part of me being human. If I can accept that you go hunting dragons for pants, then you can accept I'm still afraid of losing you, even when I know how strong you are."

He nods once, seriously. "Okay."

"Okay, meaning…?" She squints at him suspiciously.

With one hand, he smooths the lapels of her kosode, and with the other takes her hand. "Meaning I'll tell you what you want to know. Or… I could bring you with me? So you can see me fight for yourself."

A snicker fights to escape her throat, but she manages to restrain it until she gets words out. "Don't you mean so I can see you show off?" For once, she manages to make him blush, the faintest hint of pink across the bridge of his nose and the tops of his cheekbones. She waits just long enough for him to open his mouth before she interrupts. "I'll think about it."

Chagrined, he can only shake his head at her, but he's still smiling, until she squeezes his hand, then drops it in favor of tying back her hair. "Are you ready, then? We should get going if there's nothing else. They're beautiful clothes, and I'm grateful for the gift, but I know what your intentions were, giving it to me now. She won't question what she can see with her own eyes, I suppose."

"Yes. I suppose."

"Kouga-"

He shakes his head again, a swift, wolfish gesture that doesn't negate anything, but serves to clear his thoughts. "I know, I know. But you can't blame me for not wanting to deal with her, or-" He snatches up the paper, crumpling it a little more as he waves it in her direction. "This."

"No, I don't. But the sooner we deal with it, the sooner it's done. And… I do have to give you something in return, don't I? When we come back."

She finds herself in his embrace without warning, then in a whirlwind, moving breathless through the den with his arms around her, protecting her from the cutting pressure of the air. He pauses outside, to get his direction, and she laughs and tugs his arm, trying to hold him back. "Are we really in that much of a hurry?"

The smirk is back on his face at full force, and he tugs her close again, then up into his arms. "No, not really. But who said sooner dealt with, sooner done? It's spring, woman. I promised to show you magic and wild things when I brought you home with me, do you remember? I want to keep that promise, not get tangled in human trouble. Spring is the only time of year I'm free to do what I want."

He scowls, just a little, tugging at one of her sleeves with thumb and forefinger. "That's why I planned for these, had them made. There are places you'd be in trouble for not announcing who and what you are. Even if they come in handy now…"

Kagome leans up to kiss his cheek. "You know, so much has happened since then, I forgot. But you did say that, trying to tempt me to come with you. I'll hold you to it."

She's pleased to see a smile on his face again, before she has to close her eyes against the pressure of the wind.

The miko is real, after all. Real, and fulfilling the worst of all the rumors Sango had heard just by the manner of her arrival. She comes carried in the arms of the Wolf, her own arms wrapped around his shoulders, her face pressed intimately against the curve of his neck. Perhaps she is hiding from the dust, or the wind, but he says something to her as it settles. Rather than demand he put her down, she smiles at him, turns her face up expectantly and accepts the demon's kiss.

Only then does the Wolf put her down, but he lingers close behind her, not quite touching, a malicious presence that can't be ignored. Sango still tries to ignore him, tries to take in as many details as she can all at once. A miko, yes, dressed in red and white, the pulse of her power obvious to Sango, trained to detect such energies. The Wolf had called her my woman, and that had given Sango certain expectations, but the miko seems younger than she had expected. Younger than she is, even, barely more than a girl.

The longer Sango looks at her, the more things seem outside her expectations. Her clothes are the right color, but the wrong fabric. Leather? More than leather. Something other. There's a hint of gleam where the sunlight hits the white of her kosode, something gold as a harvest moon glinting at her collar and the edges of her sleeves. Ocean waves distort the shadow of her hakama as the wind moves them. Disoriented, Sango looks up at her face instead.

She has unruly hair, unruly eyes - startling blue, not brown, above a mouth that's set in an unhappy line. Very red, that mouth, as if refusing to allow her to forget the blasphemy of the kiss she's seen. It moves, as the miko speaks.

"Well? Are you convinced I'm real, now?"

Sango is startled out of staring and flushes, first in embarrassment and then in anger at the exasperated tone of those words. She bites back her first, irritated response, and dares to step forward beyond the semicircle of wolves that has kept her in the confines of her tiny cave since dawn. "I was not unconvinced, miko-sama. Allow me to introduce myself -"

"I'm Kagome, not miko-sama. And you're Sango. Do you have a surname? But I don't really care if you do. Sango, the yōkai taijiya, a slayer of demons. A murderer. The last murderer of a whole clan of murderers."

There's no anger in the words, they're almost conversational, but Sango feels the blood drain from her face, knows she needs to say something, but can't think of anything to say.

There is a miko who lives with the wolves in the Ou Mountains. She is the Wolf's woman, beloved of the Alpha of Echigo.

Why hadn't she thought of this before? Why hadn't she considered what she would do if the rumors were true?

Together they cleansed the harpies from the eastern peaks. Do you think she loves him in return?

When Sango says nothing, the miko – Kagome – opens her mouth again. "You don't need to lie or try to think up ways to act nicely. I saw what I needed to see in the look on your face when Kouga kissed me. Just like in Edo-" But she stops then, and takes a full step back, though Sango hasn't moved.

Maybe she uses softness as a leash to tame him!

Yes, that was what the rumors had said. But then why does it feel like the Wolf is the one who's tamed her?

Kagome's glare is sharp, and she knows it, but she has only two reasons for being here, and neither is to reassure Sango. She feels bad for being so blunt about her feelings, but only a little. The expression of disgust on the woman's face had been disappointing, but just that, and it had removed the tiny hope still persisting in the back of Kagome's mind. She knows better now; she will remember for the future. She no longer expects anything else from humans in Sengoku Jidai.

Mostly, Kagome is here to see if something this woman says can solidify her suspicions enough for her to grab hold of them. Her secondary purpose is to see if there's a shikon shard somewhere in Sango's body, and she can tell even from this distance why Kouga was suspicious. Something is wrong; she can feel it, not see it, but it is the presence of the sacred jewel.

Sango seems more angry than anything else, waiting in silence for what, Kagome doesn't really know. Oh, well. She can keep waiting. The woman has squeezed her hands into fists, and there's a notch between her eyebrows deep enough to hold a chopstick, but none of that is what Kagome's looking for.

A hint from Miroku drifts through her mind, and she closes her eyes, trying to see only the things that they don't see for her. It's difficult; in the den she has practiced on Wolves and the negative-energy imprint of Miroku's curse. Here, it's not quite the same, but she's surprised to find that the layer which distracts her from what she wanted to find is almost a combination of both things, the yōki with which she's most familiar, and the oily, miasmic sludge of the curse.

The first thing she sees with her miko senses attuned is that Kouga's suspicion was right – there's a shikon shard in Sango, a large one, embedded in the flesh right between her shoulder blades. The fragment of jewel is velvety purple, rich with the same corruption she first encountered in the harpies' shard.

Third is a subtle thread, thin as a single strand of spider's web, wrapped around the shard like a delicate shroud. This, this is the thing with the poisonous sewer stink, the thing that kept her from seeing the shard at first glance, and she takes a step back the moment she becomes aware of it. As she does so, she can see that the thread is only one of many. A squirming cascade of such strands is hovering in the air, densely packed around the taijiya's body, wavering in the mist of the morning like sickly worms.

The sight, the feeling, makes her nauseous, and Kagome swallows hard, then has to turn away despite herself. It's too much, too gross, and a terrible, horrible thought wavers in the back of her mind, but she's trying too hard not to be sick to focus on it. Something about the daimyo, and his message, and his messenger –

The threads quest vaguely in her direction, and Kagome backs up, and up, avoiding them, until she stumbles over a root she can't see with her eyes closed, and Kouga grabs her arm to stop her from falling. "Kagome?"

She blinks up at his face, opens her eyes to the sunlight again, and the luminous presence of his yōkai self soothes her disordered senses until they fade once more into the background. Compulsively, she still rubs her hands down over her arms, though the sickening threads haven't touched her. "It's so disgusting, like they're rotting. Spools and spools of - something. All around her, and the shard in her. You were right, it's a shard of shikon no tama, but it's corrupt. More than corrupt, I…"

Now that she's aware of them, she can't unsee them, and as the nasty worm-strands move closer, she pushes Kouga to one side, avoiding the tendrils while he stares at her blankly.

"Kagome?"

"What are they? Don't let them touch you, can't you see them?"

He shakes his head solemnly, but obeys her prodding when she moves him out of the way again, and again, until they stop, and she stops. She looks up at Sango, who's staring at both of them like they're crazy, but the words refuse to come.

Kouga is finally the one who says something. "Did you know, taijiya?"

"Know… did I know what?"

"That you're inches from death, and might even be dead right now, except there's a shard of shikon no tama buried in your back."

"What? No!" She's too startled, too shocked, for it to be an act, and Kagome relaxes the tiniest bit. "That's nonsense, Kagewaki-dono spared no expense to heal me after we finally slew the demon who had possessed his father. The sacred jewel is a thing yōkai lust for, it's not for humans to use."

Kagome stares at her for a long moment, then sighs as the thing that's been nagging her all this time comes clear. That's it. Of course that's it. "Sorry, but it's more likely that Kagewaki-dono is the demon you were trying to kill. Or there could be another one, I suppose, but really it makes more sense that there's just one, and he was strong enough to fake his own death. And then he used the shard to keep you alive; you're a real human, it's easier for him to make use of you than expose himself, especially to us."

Sango is silent – enraged, obviously, her face red and her arms trembling, but she has remarkable self-control, and neither moves nor says anything. Kagome sighs, and then takes a deep breath, sets her shoulders and strides forward, while Kouga frowns and the woman takes a defensive stance.

"Can't just leave it there, but no matter what I do it's going to be trouble." Kagome is muttering mostly to herself, but Sango flinches away the moment she's close enough to touch her.

"What are you doing, you can't intend to harm a messenger, even if you're on their side!"

Kagome blinks at her, then jabs a finger into Sango's chest and wishes fiercely she had something sharper. "Side? I'm not on a side, there aren't any sides. Or no, you know what? I'm on common sense's side. And you –" With one swift, unexpected movement, she darts behind Sango and yanks down the collar of her yukata. "You are on the ground."

"What are you doing, no I'm not!"

Then Kagome plucks out the shard with her other hand, and Sango lets out a heart rending scream and drops like a puppet with its strings cut. Kagome is astonished to see that she doesn't fall all the way, though she must be in an enormous amount of pain. She stays on her knees, desperately trying to push herself upright, for nearly thirty seconds before she finally collapses onto her face.

A/N: Down she goes! And there we have it! Technically… the gang's all here! This chapter's title, Horresco Referens, means "I shudder as I tell". I'll just be in my cackling corner while I prepare for the next chapter of DOOM.

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