One fine morning on a day Treville had granted me a day of rest I had made my way to call upon Constance only to find that she had a new guest in her house. A sweet young girl with a shy smile, who was the daughter of Boniceux's cousin, Fleur Boudin. When Constance introduced us, Fleur beamed at me giddily, barely suppressing a giggle as she rushed to take up my hands and squeeze them with all her might. "Constance has told me so much about you, miss! Are you truly the one who embroidered all those fabrics and gowns? Could you teach me? I have never seen anything so fine," the rush of words caught me by surprise, the vibrant energy a little too startling when unprepared to meet it.
"Indeed, the work is mine…it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Fleur. I hope Paris meets all of your expectations." She assured me that it did. Her father had brought her here to spend some time with Constance, believing that she required womanly company to temper her youthful spirit. Thus far, I could safely say that the intent had not succeeded.
"Alright, alright, let go now Fleur before you make her hands turn blue," Constance drew Fleur away so that she was forced to release my hands which had started to ache from the intensity of her hold. I rubbed the wrists to encourage the blood flow, but now that I had adjusted to this new addition, I smiled to her.
"I do not break easily, Constance, do not worry. Come, tell me about yourself Fleur. I should like to become better acquainted with my new friend," the mere suggestion that I considered her a friend was enough to set Fleur's smile ablaze. The swift pace of her speech filled the Bonacieux house for quite some time without pause as Constance and I sat together. In terms of age, Fleur was most certainly the youngest of us for she still retained the innocence of youth, and I smiled nostalgically for a time when I had been just like her. That had been many years ago now.
All the same, it was impossible to dislike Fleur and she was keen to be of service whilst she stayed under Constance's roof. She was quick witted and I even taught her a few simple stitches to begin her embroidery lessons. It was perhaps the only time she was quiet when she was adamantly focused upon the thread. She did not possess a natural talent for the skill, but I assured her that no one truly began their journey as very good at something. I had taken several years to master the art to the level of proficiency I held today. "It takes time, just as all good things worth cultivating do. Time and practice." This mollified her a great deal.
From that day onwards, I often found Fleur at Constance's home, and sometimes we would cross paths in the city whilst I was running my own errands. If she caught sight of me, Fleur would eagerly call my name and wave until she had captured my attention. Upon one such occasion, I was introduced to a friend Fleur had made, another sweet young girl by the name of Thérèse. They were the giddiest little darlings, and they would often follow at my skirts like chirping ducklings.
They talked a great deal as young girls would, but I soon began to catch snippets of their conversations which intrigued me. Especially when they began to discuss the latest Latin passages they had learned. "You are studying Latin?" Enquiring curiously, I perched my basket upon my hip as I observed the two girls who ceased their whispering, their arms full of linens which they had offered to carry for me. Their eyes widened with a flash of fear, as if they had been caught in the middle of committing a heinous act. I chuckled. "Nolite timere, do not be afraid. I am only curious. Where did you learn Latin?" Their mouths dropped open in shock.
For two young girls of low social status, it was understandable that I would be amazed that they knew Latin at all. Suddenly they grasped my arms and pulled me with them away from the busy Parisian streets to where we could speak and be heard, but not overheard. Their brilliant smiles were alight with wonder. "You are educated! I should have known, you speak so well. Much better than us," Fleur rushed to say as Thérèse gripped at my arm.
"Where did you learn? Did the comtesse teach you as well?" For a moment I did not understand what the girl was asking. What did they know about a comtesse? Surely they did not mean my mother, the former Comtesse de la Fère? Only those within my immediate circle knew of my heritage. Neither girl should have any inclination of my birth.
"Which comtesse?" Choosing to speak carefully, I studied them both as they shared a look, silently communicating with one another before seemingly deciding that I was trustworthy of their secret.
"The Comtesse de Larroque, my mother works in her service and she teaches girls like us so that we might receive a good education and further our prospects." Upon hearing this, I allowed myself to settle. They were not referring to my late mother. I understood now. "She teaches us letters, and how to read, and she has even begun to teach us Latin."
"She has even suggested that we might study Greek, but I enjoy her lectures about the stars the most. You should come with us!" Fleur eagerly invited me to attend, describing how the comtesse would be teaching again very soon. She hosted girls of all ages and stations in her home, any and all were welcome. "You will love her, she is utterly brilliant. If I learn well, then perhaps I can find good work for myself and not have to marry." It was a little startling to discover that there was such a brash and forward thinking woman in Paris who dared move against the expectations of society, but I must admit, I was intrigued.
If nothing else, it had been so long since I had read a book of fact or studied something that I discovered that I was aching for a new fount of knowledge. My education had certainly not been lacking, my brothers had seen to it that I was a well-educated young woman with all the acceptable studies of our time, but they also allowed me to study whatever I desired to read. Our family library had once been a grand feature of our house, though I imagine it was all ash by now. What few books I had brought with me when I left were aged and fragile from being read so many times over.
Before I knew it, I was agreeing to go with them. This comtesse figure intrigued me. I wanted to see for myself what all the fuss was about, and I could never turn down such an opportunity to perhaps learn something new. Both Fleur and Thérèse were overjoyed at my agreement, and they could talk of nothing else but education and the comtesse thereafter. They even invited Constance but she politely refused. She excused that she simply had too much work to be getting on with, but I had to wonder.
Perhaps since she was already receiving instruction in swordplay and shooting, she did not want to undertake another secret to keep from her husband which he may inevitably uncover. The lessons for women were not entirely unknown in Paris, spoken of in disapproving whispers by some and eager anticipation by others. I too was eager to see the truth of the matter for myself, and I was not disappointed. At first I was distracted by the grand majesty of the comtesse's residence, far larger than my own former home several times over.
It was open and spacious, seemingly flooding with light as if to encourage a sense of enlightenment. Thérèse led me by the hand, knowing where to go as I became distracted by portraits and paintings, even recognising the style of several artists. It was a place of wonder. Therefore, it only seemed right that it's mistress should also be an otherworldly beauty. I shall admit. When I first lay my eyes upon the comtesse, she took my breath away. Everything pertaining to womanly beauty and elegance belonged to her. She was fair and graceful, seemingly floating as she walked from one student to another, her lecture already beginning. Fleur and Thérèse quickly found a place to sit in order to listen, forgetting completely about everything other than the sound of the comtesse's voice.
Perhaps she was an angel in disguise. It would not surprise me if she were. She talked of stars and the celestial bodies, how they moved across the sky at night and our knowledge of the planets, a book held in her hand open upon the same page. Not once did she require it to confirm her facts, knowing everything completely by heart. Clearly she was intelligent, and her eagerness to impart knowledge begged a swell of admiration for her. I listened as she spoke but did not sit, distracted once more but this time by books.
Quietly I moved around the borders of her parlour, where endless rows of books beckoned to me. I read their titles, gracing my fingertips down the leather-bound spines until finally I selected one. Within seconds, I became lost within the pages. Somehow I had found a place to sit without even raising my eyes from the neat scrawl, delving into the pages with a determination to soak in every single word. All sense of time was lost, and it was only when someone touched my shoulder I realised that the lesson was finished. The Comtesse de Larroque was smiling down upon me.
"I see you have found a volume to your liking," she indicated to the book in my hand, but for a moment I was spellbound by her beauty. It took several moments, but then I realised I had been reading her books without permission and so I hastily sprang to my feet.
"Forgive me, comtesse, I should have asked first," apologising to the lady, I made to hand the book back but she refused to take it, her gentle eyes surveying me curiously.
"No apology is necessary, all are welcome to come and read from my collection whenever they so desire. Tell me, who taught you to read?" Over her shoulder I noticed Fleur and Thérèse lingering, listening with keen interest to my conversation with the comtesse.
"My mother," it was the truth. My mother had begun my tutelage when I was young. "And then my elder brothers continued to teach me after she passed."
"My condolences," a flicker of sorrow creased her smooth brow as I nodded in appreciation for her kindness. "You have fine brothers, young lady. Not many men would condone the education of a young woman. Did you have any difficulty with this particular book?" Her question was polite, however were we in court and my station known to others, it might have been taken as an insult to suggest that I would struggle to read. In this place, however, I recognised that she did not know my identity, and therefore most likely assumed that I was another commoner seeking to better herself.
"Books have always been a favourite pastime of mine. I do not have the opportunity these days to simply sit and read, so this has been a refreshing change," carefully selecting my words, I drew my sight away from Fleur and Thérèse to look upon the comtesse, lowering my voice so that it would not be overheard. "My education was extensive." A fine eyebrow arched itself delicately, an interest deepening within the comtesse as the corners of her mouth tilted upwards.
"What is your name?"
"You may call me Madeleine, my lady."
"Well then, Madeleine, I should like to hear more of this extensive education of yours." Then she took my by the arm and had me walk with her as the other girls dispersed. Thérèse and Fleur lingered longest of all but I politely dismissed them, telling them that I would see them another time and that they should run along home before they were missed. For Fleur especially, it was important that her absence was not noted. We waited until we were entirely alone before the comtesse resumed her discussion. "You are not like the other girls who come here."
"No, my lady. Indeed I am not."
"Your manners and speech indicate a fine education, one of rank and background. Tell me, who are your family?" To this I did not wish to reveal the truth. My family history was a sad story and well known throughout the court of Paris, albeit the nobles did not know our faces. We had never been ones to join the frivolities of court and the royal household. Although I believed the comtesse to be a trustworthy woman who would not ridicule my family's misfortune, it was simply too painful to speak of, even to this day.
"In my family, only I and my one elder brother remain. We have endured many misfortunes together, and he is all I have left in this world." Thinking of Athos naturally brought warm and gentle feelings aloft, allowing my features to soften as I pictured him in my mind. "He is a wonderful man and a kind brother. He cherishes me more than I deserve, perhaps he is even a little too lenient with me sometimes, but I am grateful that he allows me my freedoms. He has never limited my desires, never wished me to fit into a preordained mould of a gentle and noble woman. I am fortunate to be his kin, he is the best man I know." Having spoken only a fraction of all the fine qualities I could attribute to my brother, my enthusiasm made the comtesse laugh lightly. The sound was as musical as a bell.
"He must be a fine man indeed if he is all that you claim,"
"Indeed he is, I cannot fault him. In my eyes, he does not possess a single flaw." She chuckled once more as we continued to walk about the parlour.
"I should like to meet this brother of yours one day. What is his name?" Thinking nothing of it, I told her Athos's name before the subject was set aside and she returned to the discussion of my education. She asked what I had studied as a girl and how far my education had ventured. The comtesse delighted in my knowledge of languages, as I was competent in Latin, Greek, Spanish, English, French and even Italian. To a lady, at least a bare understanding of these languages was vital, for as my governess once said, a lady of court must be able to charm her audience in any tongue.
We discussed mathematics and philosophy, science of the mind and body, the material of the world and foreign policies. Together we poured over maps and discussed the history of places I had only read of in pages, able to recall the facts and intricate details from the books I had all but memorised. In fact, we talked for so long that the comtesse invited me to stay for dinner. At first I refused, thinking that I did not belong at a grand table, but she insisted, and I found it difficult to refuse her gentle imploration. I had no work today, and the day was still young enough that I could join the comtesse for dinner and be home at a reasonable hour. She promised not to keep me.
Thankfully she did not take her dinner in the main hall where I imagined a long, mahogany table to be set with silverware and elaborate floral decorations. If I were to sit with her there, I would have been thoroughly embarrassed to be in such a fine place dressed in a plain frock and unkempt hair. Instead, we ate in a smaller and more intimate room with an excellent view of the gardens. When the food began to arrive, I had to suppress my urge to bury my face into it as the fragrant scents taunted my ravenous stomach. At the very least, I had a reason to use my table manners for the first time in years. Truth by told, a small part of me was glad to be able to act, speak and behave like a lady.
The art had been so thoroughly instilled into me that it felt like a liberation to behave as what was natural. Still, it was difficult to refuse the temptation to shove the entire grouse into my mouth from how mouthwatering succulent it looked. "You are a curiosity indeed, Madeleine," the comtesse finally spoke after we had satisfied our stomachs with several mouthfuls of food. Debating was hungry work, after all. "I must say, your table etiquette is marvellous. Your background is quite the enigma."
"I was simply well taught, my lady, that is all."
"Please, call me Ninon." For a lady of high rank to invite me to call her by her Christian name was quite astonishing. Perhaps if my life was different, such as I was still the sister of a Comte and had debuted into society, such an invitation would be acceptable. As of right now, however, I was merely an obscure young lady of an undetermined background, a stranger to the comtesse. Yet her eyes conveyed a kindness rarely found in the nobility, and I felt at ease in her presence.
"Lady Ninon," accepting her invitation, I maintained a polite cordiality as was proper which she too accepted. We continued to speak of education, and I asked questions of Lady Ninon's own upbringing to which she revealed how she had been taught by no less than fifteen different governesses in the span of only three years. We laughed together at this. According to her, she had been far too headstrong and defiant to let them dictate what she should learn. Lady Ninon saw to her own education by reading her father's books until he had finally relented and provided her with the proper tutors.
It was fascinating to listen to her, even if it was the simplest of tales. She was worldly and wise, sharing ideas with me of her dream that would realise the value of giving women the same education as a man might receive. "Not just the nobility, of course those of rank or wealth can afford to teach their daughters such things as reading and writing, I refer to the civilian women who have little choice but to either enter service or be married off at far too young an age." Lady Ninon flung out her hand to emphasise her distaste in such a notion. "We women are just as keen of intellect as any man. More so, I would argue. We are not so easily distracted and swayed by the countless pursuits men entertain."
"Absolutely, even according to the Bible, the fruit of knowledge was first obtained by Eve," I reflected, sipping on a little wine to moisten my throat as it had dried considerably from so much talking. "Woman possessed knowledge first, therefore does it not stand to reason that our minds are better adapted for progressive thought?"
"What a delightful sentiment!" Beaming, Lady Ninon laughed brightly as she rested herself easily against her chair. "Yes indeed, it is written plainly in the texts. Perhaps I shall raise this point when next the discussion arises that women are inferior to men."
"Oh to be certain, we allow them to think so, otherwise there would be no one left to do the real work." Lifting my goblet, I saluted Lady Ninon who returned the gesture. "To ignorant men, may they forever remain so."
"Hear-hear!" Toasting our cups, we drank deeply of our wine until it was entirely consumed. By now the hour was growing late. A chill had started to cling to the air and servants had begun to light the candles to maintain the light which was fast diminishing in the sky. Noticing my distraction, Lady Ninon also turned her face to look out of the window. "Goodness me, I have kept you too long, Madeleine. For that I apologise,"
"Please do not, I have not spent such an afternoon of leisure and stimulating company in a long time," not wishing to tarnish my wonderful day with apologies, I rose to my feet only after Lady Ninon had done so. It was rude to rise before the host, you understand. "But I must return now, my brother might begin to worry for me." A twinkling smile touched Lady Ninon's features as she signalled to one of her servants.
"Ah yes, the faultless brother. We should not let him worry," turning her head to speak to her servant, she requested that the carriage be brought for me. I tried to assure her that such a thing was unnecessary and that I could walk home very easily, but Lady Ninon would not hear of it. "It is my fault I have kept you too long, and I would not rest easy unless I knew I had sent you home safely. Please allow me to do this for you, Madeleine." Once more, I was unable to refuse. Lady Ninon took my arm and laced it over her own to escort me herself.
We spoke a little further to make arrangements for my next visit. The comtesse insisted that I was welcome to return at any time, and that she looked forward to many more scintillating debates as I could give. I blushed to hear such compliments. Another maid came forward without a word but smiling cheerfully to present me with a parchment detailing a list of dates and scheduled lectures for the next month, as well as a volume wrapped in a velvet covering. The book I had started to read. "Oh no, my lady, I could not take such a precious…"
"It is my gift to you, as a token of the beginning of a wonderful friendship," Lady Ninon halted me, brushing back a loose lock of my hair as she did so. "You may come and read any of my books and take them away with you should you wish. My doors are always open to you…Lady Madeleine." The keenness of her gaze assured me that she was not unwise to my true heritage. Of course, someone as clever as her would have surely put the pieces together. Even if she did not know my family name, she knew that I was born of nobility.
My hand jumped to my mouth as I gasped, staring at her with wide, glassy eyes for several long moments. When had someone last addressed me as a lady? Five years at least. All of a sudden, it felt like an age. My mouth trembled a little as the press of emotion welled up within me, overcome by such a simple acknowledgement of my birthright. I had sacrificed a great deal of pride to become a working woman, and although now I was accustomed to the work and had adjusted to my new position, a part of me still longed to be a noblewoman once more. It was my birthright, and it was a large part of my sense of self. Lady Ninon kissed my cheek. "We shall see one another soon,"
"Yes…yes we shall." I vowed to it. That night I went away in a daze, clutching my new treasure to my chest as if afraid that someone would attempt to pry it from my fingers. It felt as if my entire world had turned on its head as the comtesse's carriage swept me away back to my home. Thankfully, it was a plain and unmarked carriage, so it did not draw attention. The coachman took me all the way to my street and wished me a good evening, politely tipping his hat so I returned the gesture with a curtsey. He did not leave until he had safely observed me enter my door, before I then heard the crack of the whip and the horses begin to clatter away with their hooves drumming against the stones.
Only once I was inside did I finally release the breath I had been unwittingly holding. I went to my room and struck a match to light a candle before sinking onto my bed, where my new book lay waiting. I stared at it for some time, unable to comprehend my great fortune, before finally I pulled it free from its cover and returned to the page I had left, reading by candlelight long into the night.